How much did you spend / would you spend on an e-ring?

[rosetta]

I too would brag if I was in the high income bracket...

Don't be silly DF. You know that would be utterly crass.

I still don't get why the OP wants to buy a diamond when both he and his fiancé think they're a waste of money. Maybe they just want to waste our time (you're very kind Gypsy, but I'm not convinced OP deserves your help).

 

[Christina...]

*yawn* I've better things to do with my time, and you, apparently have better things to do with your money. Good luck to you.

Christina... ive missed you.

Awww! Thanks Neil {{hugs}} I've missed all of you too!

 

[Lula]

Thanks guys some of the diamonds look very good. I will definitely need to some research before going online because the blind aspect does not appeal to me but the budget does.

All I can say with certainty is that she will be very happy with whatever I get her. With regards to my income, I will let you speculate if you wish Your expectations are also pretty ridiculous, assuming they are honest. No one in their right mind would spend that on a ring who makes 250k. Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better

wow --you are a piece of work. I have never seen anyone toss around judgements quite so superciliously on this site. "Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better." Seriously????????? People spend all kinds of money on things that other people think are silly. I know hedge fund guys up to their gills in debt and teachers with tidy sums living modestly. In fact as we see a great many "finance" people made a lot of money the old fashioned way-by cheating. I think people in finance are, by and large, soulless, greedy, paper pushers. You came on here bragging and proselytizing all at the same time. Please desist. There are plenty of accomplished people on this forum and in "finance" in every range of income with different financial priorities. Why dont you eschew the trappings of bourgeoisie and use a blade of grass. Quit your finance job and go live off the land where you can feel morally superior to others. Quite frankly working in finance doesnt give you that right.

Love your response, bgray!

 

[AprilBaby]

Thanks guys some of the diamonds look very good. I will definitely need to some research before going online because the blind aspect does not appeal to me but the budget does.

All I can say with certainty is that she will be very happy with whatever I get her. With regards to my income, I will let you speculate if you wish Your expectations are also pretty ridiculous, assuming they are honest. No one in their right mind would spend that on a ring who makes 250k. Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better

wow --you are a piece of work. I have never seen anyone toss around judgements quite so superciliously on this site. "Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better." Seriously????????? People spend all kinds of money on things that other people think are silly. I know hedge fund guys up to their gills in debt and teachers with tidy sums living modestly. In fact as we see a great many "finance" people made a lot of money the old fashioned way-by cheating. I think people in finance are, by and large, soulless, greedy, paper pushers. You came on here bragging and proselytizing all at the same time. Please desist. There are plenty of accomplished people on this forum and in "finance" in every range of income with different financial priorities. Why dont you eschew the trappings of bourgeoisie and use a blade of grass. Quit your finance job and go live off the land where you can feel morally superior to others. Quite frankly working in finance doesnt give you that right.

Love your response, bgray!

My husband makes more money than you and is older and smarter than you and he has no problem spending money on diamonds for me. He does know better. Keep me happy and he will be happy.

 

[LLJsmom]

So what you are saying is you are very wealthy but you are cheap. What a prize.

I have been trying to be a good, nice girl and not post to this thread again but AprilBaby this just made me laugh out loud at my daughter's gymnastics class!! 'nuff said...

 

[Niel]

I too would brag if I was in the high income bracket...

Don't be silly DF. You know that would be utterly crass.

I still don't get why the OP wants to buy a diamond when both he and his fiancé think they're a waste of money. Maybe they just want to waste our time (you're very kind Gypsy, but I'm not convinced OP deserves your help).

There's some very lovely rings in eBay for less than a grand. As I know the OP said his girlfriend is practically minded but her poor womanly brain gets hysterical over diamonds. Best of both worlds.

 

[rosetta]

Thanks guys some of the diamonds look very good. I will definitely need to some research before going online because the blind aspect does not appeal to me but the budget does.

All I can say with certainty is that she will be very happy with whatever I get her. With regards to my income, I will let you speculate if you wish Your expectations are also pretty ridiculous, assuming they are honest. No one in their right mind would spend that on a ring who makes 250k. Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better

wow --you are a piece of work. I have never seen anyone toss around judgements quite so superciliously on this site. "Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better." Seriously????????? People spend all kinds of money on things that other people think are silly. I know hedge fund guys up to their gills in debt and teachers with tidy sums living modestly. In fact as we see a great many "finance" people made a lot of money the old fashioned way-by cheating. I think people in finance are, by and large, soulless, greedy, paper pushers. You came on here bragging and proselytizing all at the same time. Please desist. There are plenty of accomplished people on this forum and in "finance" in every range of income with different financial priorities. Why dont you eschew the trappings of bourgeoisie and use a blade of grass. Quit your finance job and go live off the land where you can feel morally superior to others. Quite frankly working in finance doesnt give you that right.

Love your response, bgray!

My husband makes more money than you and is older and smarter than you and he has no problem spending money on diamonds for me. He does know better. Keep me happy and he will be happy.

+1 (though I'm not sure how old you are, but you sound young and silly so I'll assume we're older than you).

 

[AprilBaby]

Maybe we should send him to the "board that shall not be mentioned" . All the look for none of the price!

 

[Lula]

I too would brag if I was in the high income bracket...

Don't be silly DF. You know that would be utterly crass.

I still don't get why the OP wants to buy a diamond when both he and his fiancé think they're a waste of money. Maybe they just want to waste our time (you're very kind Gypsy, but I'm not convinced OP deserves your help).

There's some very lovely rings in eBay for less than a grand. As I know the OP said his girlfriend is practically minded but her poor womanly brain gets hysterical over diamonds. Best of both worlds.

 

[rosetta]

I too would brag if I was in the high income bracket...

Don't be silly DF. You know that would be utterly crass.

I still don't get why the OP wants to buy a diamond when both he and his fiancé think they're a waste of money. Maybe they just want to waste our time (you're very kind Gypsy, but I'm not convinced OP deserves your help).

There's some very lovely rings in eBay for less than a grand. As I know the OP said his girlfriend is practically minded but her poor womanly brain gets hysterical over diamonds. Best of both worlds.

Yes women are so irrational that even when they know the rational choice, their dastardly ovaries get the better of them and they are foiled, foiled I say!

 

[OreoRosies86]

A plain platinum band is chic, simple, relatively inexpensive, and says "married." Why not just do that and call it a day?

 

[AprilBaby]

The saudi's blame all that ovary hysteria on women driving. I guess this is the proof. I drive. I get hysterical over diamonds. My poor ovaries are damaged from driving. Makes sense.

 

[Laila619]

$5,000 will get her a very nice ring. I think OP and his fiancee are practical and smart. Some of the wealthiest people wear just plain bands.

Is the OP coming across a bit rude? Yes. But I do think he means well and is just trying to come to grips with what he views to be a bad financial investment while wanting to make his lady happy.

 

[msop04]

$5,000 will get her a very nice ring. I think OP and his fiancee are practical and smart. Some of the wealthiest people wear just plain bands.

Is the OP coming across a bit rude? Yes. But I do think he means well and is just trying to come to grips with what he views to be a bad financial investment while wanting to make his lady happy.

I wouldn't consider making your SO feel special/spoiled/happy with a once in a lifetime gift a "bad investment." LOL I guess that's my weak, female mind talking though...

 

[msop04]

The saudi's blame all that ovary hysteria on women driving. I guess this is the proof. I drive. I get hysterical over diamonds. My poor ovaries are damaged from driving. Makes sense.

 

[lookingforever]

So what you are saying is you are very wealthy but you are cheap. What a prize.

I am new to this forum so I didn't want to say anything but I was thinking the same thing.

I get the feeling he isn't the type of person that is going to feel the same way about not spending so much on the ring when he is with his big time finance friends and all their wives are sporting huge rocks because they spent a larger % than he did.

 

[Laila619]

$5,000 will get her a very nice ring. I think OP and his fiancee are practical and smart. Some of the wealthiest people wear just plain bands.

Is the OP coming across a bit rude? Yes. But I do think he means well and is just trying to come to grips with what he views to be a bad financial investment while wanting to make his lady happy.

I wouldn't consider making your SO feel special/spoiled/happy with a once in a lifetime gift a "bad investment." LOL I guess that's my weak, female mind talking though...

Lord knows I've bought gifts for DH that I thought were kind of dumb or silly or a waste of money, but they were what he wanted. I wanted to make him happy, so I did it. But me thinking they were a bad investment doesn't mean I don't love DH or want him to feel special.

 

[Laila619]

So what you are saying is you are very wealthy but you are cheap. What a prize.

I am new to this forum so I didn't want to say anything but I was thinking the same thing.

I get the feeling he isn't the type of person that is going to feel the same way about not spending so much on the ring when he is with his big time finance friends and all their wives are sporting huge rocks because they spent a larger % than he did.

It's not a competition. There will always be other people who spent more or less. Spending more $ doesn't mean someone loves his fiancee more.

 

[thadanim]

Let's be fair to this nut though I would not fall short of letting out at the OP. He has absolutely all the right in the world to do what he wants to do with his $$. What is NOT acceptable is coming to a place like this and dissing the fact that buying jewelry is a waste and being arrogant. He should be on a psychology board rather than a jewelry board.

 

[bliss_cathy]

In my opinion people in finance ie trader or fund manager, capital markets manager etc tend to be quite pretentious and like to enjoy their hard earned money. I'm not sure which area the OP is in, but my observations are that these people tend to like the nice suits and shoes and drink champagne and do other expensive recreational hobbies It's important for them as well so when they are going out for drinks with clients that they look successful.

It make a me wonder if he's in back end finance, ie not customer facing, out the back office putting together documents and filing reports for the traders.

So if he is the former type of finance person, I'm surprised that he doesn't want to buy an absolutely stunning ring for his future fiance. Considering that the posts also come off as quite condescending and pretentious.

If he's the later type, I'm surprised he's not more humble.

These contradictions make me sort of agree with canuck girl, he does sound like a troll!

OP: given you've ignored the advice of many genuinely helpful PS ers, Gypsy, Neil, Circe...what do you want from us?

Also, seriously, what do you do in finance?

 

[LLJsmom]

auktalent3 -

If you can "realistically afford" it,

And you know that "deep down she wants a nice ring",

But you think she can "survive without it",

And - although "it's a bitter pill to swallow",

And despite living in "a very up-scale neighborhood within one of the most expensive financial districts in the world"

You intend to spend "~4% of your annual salary",

Because it's so important to you not to make "arguably a very bad financial decision"….

Dude, seriously, you need to rethink more than the ring.

So what you are saying is you are very wealthy but you are cheap. What a prize.

I couldn't resist. I showed my DH. He's still laughing!!

 

[MarionC]

Thanks guys some of the diamonds look very good. I will definitely need to some research before going online because the blind aspect does not appeal to me but the budget does.

All I can say with certainty is that she will be very happy with whatever I get her. With regards to my income, I will let you speculate if you wish Your expectations are also pretty ridiculous, assuming they are honest. No one in their right mind would spend that on a ring who makes 250k. Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better

wow --you are a piece of work. I have never seen anyone toss around judgements quite so superciliously on this site. "Generally the people who do make that kind of money know better." Seriously????????? People spend all kinds of money on things that other people think are silly. I know hedge fund guys up to their gills in debt and teachers with tidy sums living modestly. In fact as we see a great many "finance" people made a lot of money the old fashioned way-by cheating. I think people in finance are, by and large, soulless, greedy, paper pushers. You came on here bragging and proselytizing all at the same time. Please desist. There are plenty of accomplished people on this forum and in "finance" in every range of income with different financial priorities. Why dont you eschew the trappings of bourgeoisie and use a blade of grass. Quit your finance job and go live off the land where you can feel morally superior to others. Quite frankly working in finance doesnt give you that right.

What OP is saying is true. Many people I know with a boat-load of money would never go overboard on a ring or a car. It's called common sense. That's how they got rich and that's how they stay rich: hard work, common sense and a certain frugality in attitude.
They have nice things, but not nearly as expensive as they could easily afford.
"Living large" is more of a wannabe trait.

 

[MarionC]

All this to-do is making me smile. Boy, did the OP push some buttons!
I'm sure he will get her something very nice that she will be happy with. He's just here working it out. Ya gotta understand that people who aren't into diamonds thinks the rest of us are a bit odd.

All the best to you, OP! I'm one of the people who agrees with you, but don't be too frugal! What you do now will be an excellent investment with great returns.

 

[Tekate]

oooh that sounds very nice Bron357! how about some pix!! I love emerald cut diamonds!!! 4 carats. I can dream! congratulations!!

peace.

This is my first post, I too am a "lurker" but I had to weigh in on this one. I'm involved in finance and I can assure you that very few interesting and enjoyable items are "investment opportunities". Engagement rings are not bought for their investment appeal but with smart purchasing you can usually get back what you put in. Engagement rings are usually the first and last biggest $$ jewellery purchase made in life. It is a ring generally worn daily for the rest of the woman's life (divorce not withstanding). On that basis my engagement ring cost a whopping sum of money (it's over 4 carat emerald cut plus 1 carat total emerald sides) HOWEVER nothing I have ever owned or will ever own gives me more pleasure and joy at least 100 times a day as I gaze down and admire its beauty. I feel a surge of extra love for my hubby for overindulging me this way every time I look at it. 13 years later and I can say unlike the wedding, honeymoon, wedding dress, photos, video etc etc, that all added up to tens of thousands of dollars which are all beautiful memories, I still have the ring. If we go bad tomorrow, I'll sell it and recover its cost. Buy the best, most awe inspiring ring you can find, one that will make your beloveds heart sing every time she glances down and it will be the best investment you ever make in life.

 

[Christina...]

$5,000 will get her a very nice ring. I think OP and his fiancee are practical and smart. Some of the wealthiest people wear just plain bands.

Is the OP coming across a bit rude? Yes. But I do think he means well and is just trying to come to grips with what he views to be a bad financial investment while wanting to make his lady happy.

I wouldn't consider making your SO feel special/spoiled/happy with a once in a lifetime gift a "bad investment." LOL I guess that's my weak, female mind talking though...

Lord knows I've bought gifts for DH that I thought were kind of dumb or silly or a waste of money, but they were what he wanted. I wanted to make him happy, so I did it. But me thinking they were a bad investment doesn't mean I don't love DH or want him to feel special.

I think the difference is that you made the gift lovingly to your DH despite the fact that you felt it was a bad investment. OP appears to feel that it's a bitter obligation. I wouldn't want any gift, let alone one that is supposed to symbolize our relationship, from a person who felt obligated or bitter about doing so.

 

[Polished]

I'm sure he will get her something very nice that she will be happy with. He's just here working it out. Ya gotta understand that people who aren't into diamonds thinks the rest of us are a bit odd.

I hope so Jimmianne but it's just that the OP doesn't seem remotely interested in diamonds or in learning about them which ought to be the task in hand for him at the moment. This casual disregard over how a considerable sum of money is going to be spent on a piece of jewelery intended to please his girlfriend, doesn't seem particularly financially savvy to me and it is making some here believe our financial guru is simply a troll.

 

[MarionC]

I'm sure he will get her something very nice that she will be happy with. He's just here working it out. Ya gotta understand that people who aren't into diamonds thinks the rest of us are a bit odd.

I hope so Jimmianne but it's just that the OP doesn't seem remotely interested in diamonds or in learning about them which ought to be the task in hand for him at the moment. This casual disregard over how a considerable sum of money is going to be spent on a piece of jewelery intended to please his girlfriend, doesn't seem particularly financially savvy to me and it is making some here believe our financial guru is simply a troll.

I hear you!

 

[Circe]

In my opinion people in finance ie trader or fund manager, capital markets manager etc tend to be quite pretentious and like to enjoy their hard earned money. I'm not sure which area the OP is in, but my observations are that these people tend to like the nice suits and shoes and drink champagne and do other expensive recreational hobbies It's important for them as well so when they are going out for drinks with clients that they look successful.

It make a me wonder if he's in back end finance, ie not customer facing, out the back office putting together documents and filing reports for the traders.

So if he is the former type of finance person, I'm surprised that he doesn't want to buy an absolutely stunning ring for his future fiance. Considering that the posts also come off as quite condescending and pretentious.

If he's the later type, I'm surprised he's not more humble.

These contradictions make me sort of agree with canuck girl, he does sound like a troll!

OP: given you've ignored the advice of many genuinely helpful PS ers, Gypsy, Neil, Circe...what do you want from us?

Also, seriously, what do you do in finance?

I think he came here for a philosophical discussion on why the hell we like these things, though I don't know if it was to confirm a bias, commiserate with like-minded others (and possibly expecting more dudes who feel put-upon), or to confirm his low opinion.

I also suspect that from what he's saying, he's still pursuing the "wholesaler" route, and not taking offers of assistance seriously, because, psssht, how hard could this be? So there's a chance he might come back in triumph as I recall a few others doing, only to be slightly crestfallen to discover HCA or the massive differences between lab certs, or what fluorescence is, or god only knows what, making his "deal" invalid. Or, hey, just resign himself to paying top dollar for something like Hearts on Fire or Tiff's - more money, but a guarantee of quality without having to waste time learning about a thing he scorns.

There is this frequent perception, I think, that certain low-status things are really easy. Look, fill-in-the-blank group of people who are stereotyped as idiots do it, I can too! Thankfully, with diamonds, the worst-case-scenario is just spending too much money on a poor performer or overpaying for a guarantee. I think he'll live, either way.

P.S. - Guys, don't take it personal.

 

[TitanCi]

If I could, I would spend all the money in the world for the ring that she DREAMS of because she is THAT worth it to me.


But I don't get the point of your question.


It's based on what people can afford or want to buy. Some people are loaded and they buy 19k stones. Some people aren't and buy 50 point stones. Also, the reverse situation occurs too. Some people buy stones to represent their love, irregardless of size.

The main point is if she loves you for YOU, she'll say yes whether it be a 2.0k rock or a 0.20k rock, right?

 

[msop04]

$5,000 will get her a very nice ring. I think OP and his fiancee are practical and smart. Some of the wealthiest people wear just plain bands.

Is the OP coming across a bit rude? Yes. But I do think he means well and is just trying to come to grips with what he views to be a bad financial investment while wanting to make his lady happy.

I wouldn't consider making your SO feel special/spoiled/happy with a once in a lifetime gift a "bad investment." LOL I guess that's my weak, female mind talking though...

Lord knows I've bought gifts for DH that I thought were kind of dumb or silly or a waste of money, but they were what he wanted. I wanted to make him happy, so I did it. But me thinking they were a bad investment doesn't mean I don't love DH or want him to feel special.

Exactly, that was my point -- and you did it anyway to make him happy. I'm right there with ya on this sort of thing. My husband wants a new bass boat -- I think it's a total waste because I can count on one hand how many times he goes out on the water each year... but he really wants one... and I want him to be happy. Guess who's going shoppoing at Bass Pro in a couple of months? This one.