Deciding on a Budget

[scarsmum]

I think that he has to be the one to set a budget or you risk him always reminding you of his underlying resentment at buying something he doesn’t think has “value”. You, in turn, may feel that your needs and wants are not valuable to him. It could be a mess. He needs to come up to the plate with a figure he is comfortable with. You can spend literally any amount on a diamond ring, there is no norm. I’m getting a sense that he won’t want to go much above 1 carat. If you are financially sound, I think that’s a shame. The ring is a symbol of your value to him since that is the meaning it has to you.

 

[vintageloves]

@vintageloves , I refer you back to @mrs-b 's excellent summation

It sounds like you do have some ideas of what you might like. Tell us what they are. We'll help you price them out, and we can give you excellent perspective on "value for money" to share with your husband - that's what we all do for fun on here

That also sounds like the way your DH wants to approach things! So...

1. You've already told us you like step cuts. Can you rate these characteristics in order of what's most important to you? Forget everyone and everything else. Just you. If you aren't sure on any of them - that's fine. Let us know.

Size - min and max. Preference? Threshold?
Colour - max and min. Preference? Threshold?
Clarity - max and min. Preference? Threshold?​

2. You've showed us some settings you like. No pave. Intricate metalwork okay, in tempered amounts. Preference for classic styles.

3. What's your finger size?

Oh, yes, I really appreciated mrs-b's post (and yours, of course!)

I cannot stand color, so I think that's the most important. Then clarity. Then size. Also, some emerald cuts just look better to me than others, and I can't explain it. I'm willing to budge on both clarity and size for a great looking cut. Not color, though. A F/G, VS1 is ideal for me, but I could go G VS2 for something that speaks to me. Nothing below G no matter what. The little we did looking at diamonds online my husband showed a strong preference for higher color/clarity numbers and thinks it's a better value (yes, I know this is not the case).

My finger size is 6.

 

[OoohShiny]

So, you like stepcuts with high colour and clarity...

http://gemconcepts.net/diamond-boutique/2-52-carat-asscher-cut-diamond-of-first-water/

http://gemconcepts.net/diamond-boutique/special-octavia-cut-diamond/



They are asscher / asscher-based, though - if you want an EC, do you like vintage-style cuts?
http://gemconcepts.net/diamond-boutique/beautiful-rare-vintage-emerald-cut-diamond/


FWIW, and IMHO, no diamond is really a 'value' purchase - they are costly for a number of reasons, from the supply chains involved, to paying for the cutting time required, to the marketing of them as a desirable luxury product that symbolises that abstract thing 'love' - and nowhere along that chain is anyone 'missing a trick', because if a diamond is priced low when compared to other diamonds of comparable specs, it is 99.9% of the time for a reason.

You may need to talk about this with your husband, and say that it is more of an emotional purchase than a cold-logic purchase!

 

[Austina]

I’ve only just got an engagement ring. We’ve been married 40 years at Christmas

When we got married, we didn’t get engaged, just decided to get married and did it.

Being a financial man, my DH just didn’t get the whole thing about spending a large sum of money on a bit of rock.

However, after all these years, he understands my desire to have a beautiful diamond, and I recently got a 4.56ct solitaire OEC.

I have some beautiful large coloured gemstone jewellery, but to me they just didn’t feel like an engagement ring.

 

[elizabethess]

This is a great idea... but it won't work through no fault of yours. He'll think we can afford E but will circle A because in his mind 1.2 ct is huuuge and why spend more when you can get exactly what you want for less than 10K? His focus is always on value, not cost. A jeweler would have to show him every one of those sizes for him to decide.

It's going to take me finding what I want, pointing to it, and saying can I have this. Then it can be yes or no. He's never, ever going to give me a budget.

And I get what you mean about wasting my time. Trust me, I've thought about giving up.

Don't give up! Just arm yourself with all the tools when you talk with him Reading through what you said, especially the steak scenario, and speaking as someone w/an ad background whose life used to revolve around pitching ideas to skeptical clients, I'm going to suggest that whatever you decide on, try to find a way to wrap that particular selection in perceived savings/value. For example: "dear husband, look at this stone/setting/package I found... I love it AND because it's just shy of a a benchmark carat weight we will save $$$$ compared to a nearly identical looking at X carat! (i.e. .9 vs. 1, 1.9 vs 2)"

Or: "I thought I'd want a colorless DEF but I love this G which seems just as white but is a drop in price per carat!"

You get the gist

 

[BlingDreams]

I think the most important thing for you to decide on is the cut you want, because we’d recommend different vendors depending on that answer. After that, size. We know color/clarity (roughly) so the budget will reveal itself after that

Perhaps go on Pinterest and start pinning rings you like the look of. After a few days/weeks, go back and review them. Usually a trend starts to emerge (ie: lots of OEC’s, asschers in a halo, rounds in a three-stone setting, etc). Then delete what you don’t like anymore, continue pinning new stuff, and see what else emerges (vintage settings, cathedral setting, milgrain, filigree, etc). Then share your favorites with us and we can help you find it!

 

[vintageloves]

Here's my idea: every month we put X away. It's not money we need for any expense or investment and it just sits there month after month, year after year, never getting touched. We have more than we need for every conceivable emergency and then some. I was thinking of proposing 6 months worth of savings toward a ring. Does that sound reasonable? My husband will have the final say, obviously, but I want to start negotiations with a strong number .

 

[Lookinagain]

It's going to take me finding what I want, pointing to it, and saying can I have this. Then it can be yes or no. He's never, ever going to give me a budget.

Then do just that. Forget about setting a budget. Find what you want. Show it to him and he will either say yes (which is great) or say no. Assuming the "no" is because of price and not just because he doesn't like the style of ring (which I hope is up to you), then you will have some idea of what the price ceiling is. Then you can always scale back a bit on the diamond, but still get the same ring made only with a diamond that is less pricey. You have to start somewhere so without a budget, just find what you want and go for it.

 

[vintageloves]

I think the most important thing for you to decide on is the cut you want, because we’d recommend different vendors depending on that answer. After that, size. We know color/clarity (roughly) so the budget will reveal itself after that

Perhaps go on Pinterest and start pinning rings you like the look of. After a few days/weeks, go back and review them. Usually a trend starts to emerge (ie: lots of OEC’s, asschers in a halo, rounds in a three-stone setting, etc). Then delete what you don’t like anymore, continue pinning new stuff, and see what else emerges (vintage settings, cathedral setting, milgrain, filigree, etc). Then share your favorites with us and we can help you find it!

This is a very good idea. I like lots of different things, but I've wanted an emerald cut for 15+ years. So I think I'm going to have to scratch that itch. But the setting is more confusing for me. I'll try your recommendation.

 

[mrs-b]

This is a very good idea. I like lots of different things, but I've wanted an emerald cut for 15+ years. So I think I'm going to have to scratch that itch. But the setting is more confusing for me. I'll try your recommendation.

Emerald cuts, because of their reflective nature, show up color and inclusions. So I agree - no warmer than an F for you, and frankly, I would say an E (which is, personally, my sweet spot). If G is as low as you could tolerate, an F, in my opinion, is still too close to that and you've made it clear that, for you, it needs to be a WHITE diamond. So let's make it white!

Also, I'd stay with a VS1 clarity. In an emerald cut, even VS2 can be dicey, and I suspect your husband WON'T think it's great value if "But I can see marks in it!" ends up being the case!! If you're spending big money - white. clean. No compromise.

Re half a year's savings - we really can't comment on that - do you understand that? We have no idea what you have 'sitting in the bank, untouched.' We have no idea what you earn. We have no idea what emergencies you've allowed for - and whether, for you, an emergency is a two thousand dollar vet bill or a need to rebuild a 500,000 dollar home after a fire. We don't know what your standard of living is like - or whether you live in downtown Manhattan or in the boondocks of Alabama. We don't know how old you are, whether this is a first or second (or third) marriage, what sort of retirement you want or, most of all, how many kids you have and how much you want available to commit to them. We cannot comment on your budget. YOU need to tell us what you want to spend.

If you truly have NO financial limits, then let's start with what size you want. To that end....

Diamond shrinkage syndrome (known here commonly as DSS) is a real thing. What looks huge on day 1 looks moderate by day 10. I got engaged with a .23ct diamond when I met my husband-to-be at university. I always wanted something MUCH bigger....like...half a carat! I'm currently waiting on delivery of my new ring - 4.01ct...in a halo! And I'm sure this is going to look just fine to me. I'll never forget a time when I wore a 2ct solitaire and had grown very used to it. I was visiting a girlfriend of mine and had always liked her ring. I wondered if mine was about as big as hers. We put our hands out and compared and...it became apparent that hers was about 3/4 of a ct, while mine was much bigger! I'd just grown so used to it, I could no longer see its size. Every experienced woman on PS will tell you that this happens, so my strongest advice to you would be to buy somewhat larger than you think you could wear comfortably; it will change over time.

Size 6 is a very average size finger - not large and not small. I would suggest, for proportional aesthetics, that you look around the 2.5ct mark. This will be a big ticket item, but I'm now trying to pin a specific size to a budget whose parameters I don't know. Are your fingers particularly short or long? Would you describe them as medium length? As for setting - my all time favorite setting for an EC is by Erika Winters. If we're talking the same language here, I'll pull up the photo and post it.

The biggest waste of money is spending any amount at all - then not getting what you want. So this needs to be right on the money in every regard. If you're spending a lot of money on this, I'm guessing that this will only make sense to your husband if it's a first rate product - otherwise there's just no justifying it.

So we need to get this right.

 

[lovedogs]

OMG #1!!!!!!!

I don't like the size of the diamond, too large for my tastes, but the style is 100% spot on! I love the double prongs. I wonder if I could get something like this made for me.

You could 100% have something like this made for you! People have had.....interesting experiences working with Leon M himself, but this design isn't anything that can't be made by a skilled bench (there are many versions of this type of 3 stone). I'd recommend figuring out what size middle stone you would want and getting a quote from David Klass or Victor Canera, Steven Kirsch, or any other benches often recommended here.

 

[vintageloves]

Re half a year's savings - we really can't comment on that - do you understand that? We have no idea what you have 'sitting in the bank, untouched.' We have no idea what you earn. We have no idea what emergencies you've allowed for - and whether, for you, an emergency is a two thousand dollar vet bill or a need to rebuild a 500,000 dollar home after a fire. We don't know what your standard of living is like - or whether you live in downtown Manhattan or in the boondocks of Alabama. We don't know how old you are, whether this is a first or second (or third) marriage, what sort of retirement you want or, most of all, how many kids you have and how much you want available to commit to them. We cannot comment on your budget. YOU need to tell us what you want to spend.

If you truly have NO financial limits, then let's start with what size you want. To that end....

Diamond shrinkage syndrome (known here commonly as DSS) is a real thing. What looks huge on day 1 looks moderate by day 10. I got engaged with a .23ct diamond when I met my husband-to-be at university. I always wanted something MUCH bigger....like...half a carat! I'm currently waiting on delivery of my new ring - 4.01ct...in a halo! And I'm sure this is going to look just fine to me. I'll never forget a time when I wore a 2ct solitaire and had grown very used to it. I was visiting a girlfriend of mine and had always liked her ring. I wondered if mine was about as big as hers. We put our hands out and compared and...it became apparent that hers was about 3/4 of a ct, while mine was much bigger! I'd just grown so used to it, I could no longer see its size. Every experienced woman on PS will tell you that this happens, so my strongest advice to you would be to buy somewhat larger than you think you could wear comfortably; it will change over time.

Size 6 is a very average size finger - not large and not small. I would suggest, for proportional aesthetics, that you look around the 2.5ct mark. This will be a big ticket item, but I'm now trying to pin a specific size to a budget whose parameters I don't know. Are your fingers particularly short or long? Would you describe them as medium length? As for setting - my all time favorite setting for an EC is by Erika Winters. If we're talking the same language here, I'll pull up the photo and post it.

The biggest waste of money is spending any amount at all - then not getting what you want. So this needs to be right on the money in every regard. If you're spending a lot of money on this, I'm guessing that this will only make sense to your husband if it's a first rate product - otherwise there's just no justifying it.

So we need to get this right.

I keep hoping there will be some sort of rule, like the old 2 months salary they used to use for engaged couples. Some rule would make it much easier. My husband likes order, rules, numbers. I'm trying to relate on his level.

Maybe I'm naive, but I'm not worried about shrinkage syndrome. If I get something beautiful, why would I need it to be bigger? I think I'm going to need to see some stones in person because 2.5 ct sounds awfully large. Maybe it's not if I see it.

The only thing remarkable about my hands is I have a high web between ring and middle. Because of this, the ring sits not all that far from my knuckle. That's one of the reasons I want a thinner band. In this sense, asschers are better (I love all the steps) because it won't get up to my knuckle. Again, I'm obviously going to have to do some in person shopping.

Does anyone know a good jeweler in DE?

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Is your current ring the shape you want to stick with? What are the dimensions--is it "right" for you?

cheers--Sharon

 

[yssie]

... Oh my goodness. My cat walked on my keyboard, and now the post that you quoted is gone. Did she delete it!!!?

Well... in any case, this is great info:
I cannot stand color, so I think that's the most important. Then clarity. Then size. Also, some emerald cuts just look better to me than others, and I can't explain it. I'm willing to budge on both clarity and size for a great looking cut. Not color, though. A F/G, VS1 is ideal for me, but I could go G VS2 for something that speaks to me. Nothing below G no matter what. The little we did looking at diamonds online my husband showed a strong preference for higher color/clarity numbers and thinks it's a better value (yes, I know this is not the case).

Many men value colour/clarity over size! And that you feel the same way is very convenient! We definitely understand that some ECs look better than others, and that "look better" is a personal judgment - we can help you with that once we've narrowed what we're looking for down a bit. I think the biggest question left is size - diamond prices increase more (ie. rate of change in price is greater) as carat increases in higher colour/clarity stones (vs. lower colour/clarity).

Your reaction to
https://www.jewelsbygrace.com/3-76ctw-emerald-cut-diamond-ring-by-leon-mege-gia-h-vs
was "perfect setting" (and yes, that style is very doable - either exactly that design from Leon or something very similar!) but "stone's too big".
~3ct, 9.53 x 6.90mm

You liked
https://www.jewelsbygrace.com/2-81ctw-art-deco-emerald-cut-ring-gia-h-vs1
but weren't sold on the setting.
~2ct, 7.82 x 7.59mm


Here are some ECs/square ECs of different sizes. I tried to find examples of styles similar to the LM you liked on similar finger sizes. The best way to find out what stone sizes you personally prefer is by visiting a jewellery store and trying various sizes on in-person, but... for right now, thoughts on stone sizing?

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-beautiful-new-ering.53625/
~1.35ct, 7.72x5.36mm
Size 5

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/need-comfort-regarding-new-side-stones-for-ec.225850/
~0.71ct
Size 6

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/emerald-cut.234435/
~2.09ct
Size 5

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/emerald-cuts-asschers-a-collection.113993/page-36
~3ct
Size 6.75

 

[yssie]

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/emerald-cuts-asschers-a-collection.113993/page-34
~1.02ct
Size 5.75

~2.03ct
Size 6.25

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/emerald-cuts-asschers-a-collection.113993/page-30
~3.01ct
Size 5.5

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/emerald-cuts-asschers-a-collection.113993/page-23
~0.91ct
Size 5.75

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/asscher-upgrade.186499/
~2ct, 7.02-7.09mm
Size 6

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/thoughts-on-2-23-ec-vvs2-k.194070/
~2.23ct, 8.31 x 7.22mm
Size 6

 

[vintageloves]

HI:

Is your current ring the shape you want to stick with? What are the dimensions--is it "right" for you?

cheers--Sharon

Noooo. My colored stone is a badly shaped cushion cut. It's not symmetrical and has a weird cutlet at the bottom shaped sort of like a triangle. I don't have strong opinions about the dimensions. I could go bigger or smaller and it's about the size of a 1.5ct diamond.

 

[Miss Marple]

I'll add my 2 cents because my experience may help with your thinking. For the longest time, I thought that I did not like diamonds. My husband purchased a traditional diamond engagement ring for me because we felt like it was a social requirement. Neither of us cared much and spent as little as we thought we could get away with. It was and is a terrible diamond but given that we did not have or want a traditional wedding, it was a way to somewhat mollify our respective mothers.

It wasn't long before that engagement ring was abandoned to a drawer. I switched over to a CS that we both loved.

fast forward 20+ years. I found PS. That's when I discovered that I just don't like diamonds that are not well cut. The past 6 months have been something of a journey that started with, "maybe I can get a nice little 5 stone ring for $1-2k" and ended with. "I'm budgeting $15-20k on a rock for our next anniversary. "

My husband still isn't really a diamond guy but he never said a word about the budget--other than hoping I don't plan to upgrade. and the reality is that if I got comfortable spending more to get what I really wanted, he would have gone along with it.

For each of us. Half the fun of a large purchase is the journey. I've been reading PS obsessively, eyeing the many lovely rings of the PSers, and viewing many, many vendor offerings. I recently ended up with a 2.76 ct antique cushion. Much to my amusement, when I showed my husband a 1.35 ct antique cushion in a setting that's totally my style, he commented that it looked a little small. Not a word about how it was 1/3 the price of my self-imposed budget. But if I'd shown him the 1.35 ct ring early in my diamond buying journey, he would have thought it was a lot of money and absolutely would have balked at my final budget. The education was key.

Based on what you've said, my impression is that your financial circumstances would allow plenty of "budget creep", and your husband needs time to understand what "value" means in the diamond and jewelry world and how that aligns with what you want. Therefore, I'd suggest that you take your time in figuring out what you really like and keep your husband updated on your research.

In addition to my online research. I visited a number of different jewelry stores and tried on many, many different rings, with different cuts. Colors. Sizes and styles. Turned out that I really did not like some things that I was certain were top contenders and loved other things that I was convinced were not in the running.

Good luck with your search, and check out Brian Gavin. I don't think anybody has mentioned them yet but they have a line of ideal emerald cut diamonds.

 

[BlingDreams]

I have to tell you @vintageloves , given what you’ve said so far I’d LOVE for you to see/end up with a 2.5ct asscher that @diagem (real name Yoram) offers on his site. I think it might have already been mentioned, and it’s a stone that I have listed over for a very long time. It’s a D color of the finest quality diamond and you could not ask for any better of a cut. I’d suggest reaching out to him for more information/photos/videos. It truly is a one-of-a-kind diamond and would scratch that step-cut itch forever!

http://gemconcepts.net/diamond-boutique/2-52-carat-asscher-cut-diamond-of-first-water/

 

[sledge]

I would agree with @mrs-b in that you should stick with an F+ color, especially looking at emerald cut diamonds. Fancy shapes will show slight tints of color much more than a round shape.

Also, due to the cut style and fact you have such a large table and shallow stone, the clarity will be very important as also pointed out. I would not exclude VS2 stones, but I would make sure they are extremely clean VS2 stones and would prefer a VS1.

This said, I think there is some value in dropping by a local diamond store and looking with your own eyes at various EMERALD CUTS. When they ask for a budget, tell them $30k. It doesn't matter if it's accurate or not. I just want you to see some stones. It gets that awkward question out of the way and will allow enough money to see stones in a high color and clarity. We can address cut and value later, but the point of this trip would be to establish your tolerance for color in clarity specifically in an EMERALD CUT stone.

I would hope you would find what you prefer and also what is your minimum so that we can establish a range of stones to seriously start looking at that we can be certain will meet your specific sensitivities.

Back to the budget question, I knew your husband was a guy that put high emphasis on value when you mentioned the steak story. Anyone that orders a bigger steak because they calculated it's less per ounce, has some financial sense. I'm just curious why he didn't take the equation further and conclude that if he ordered the bigger steak and divided by 2 (so he could share with you) then his cost for dinner was a significantly better value. I promise not to mention this to him.

While I joke, I am much the same way when I shop for groceries. Why spend $2 on 10oz when I can spend $3 and get 24oz? I'm sure you and your husband has debated this before, if he goes to the store with you.

I've heard of a different rules, but honestly I think most of them are silly and flawed, as they just don't apply to all situations. IMO, all our purchases should be based on our personal financial situation and personal comfort levels.

From what I've gathered, I think you are realistically in the $20-30k range. This is a good budget, but not the largest I've seen. Just the other day someone had roughly a $100k budget for the stone only! The one thing I've noticed we all have in common, regardless of budget amounts, is we want to get the best bang for the buck. Or the more PC term, value.

But value is such a relative term. By determining things like stone type, color and clarity sensitivity, etc. we start to understand what you value. Once we at least establish a rough budget, then we can narrow down our search to find a stone that meets that criteria and will consequently help you get a great value.

FYI, good value doesn't translate to the least amount of dollars so I think your husband is having a hard time committing to a budget. Plus how does one perceive and put a price on beauty? Qualities like color, clarity and carat size is somewhat scientific and hard data that can be objectively compared amongst stones. Cut is all about beauty. In particular EC's where you look for things like even patterns in the step cuts or alternating contrast in the step cuts. Those stones are more beautiful and worth more, even though they may have the same carat, color and clarity of another stone of less money.

Anyhow, here are some of those "rules". The one I think most of us have heard of is the 3-month salary but it's pretty flawed to when you think about it. Hope this helps somehow.

1) The Three Months Gross Salary Rule. This rule stipulates that if a man makes $80,000 a year, he should spend $20,000 on an engagement ring! What kind of nut came up with that idea? There’s really no rhyme or reason why a man should spend 3 months of his gross salary on an engagement ring, let alone 2 months. After taxes, 3 months gross is equivalent to 1/3rd his take home pay. Imagine if the man makes $400,000 a year. Is he supposed to buy her a $100,000 Harry Winston pink diamond? Ridiculous.

1b) The Three Months Net Salary Rule. Crazy!

1c) The Two Months Gross or Net Salary Rule. Nuts!

1d) The 1 Month Gross or Net Salary Rule. OK, not so bad as it’s under 1/10th a man’s annual gross or net income. Again, here we go with the 1/10th rule for car buying, which hints at something beautiful.

2) The Age Rule. Another crazy rule is for the man to buy a quality ring whose size is equivalent to the age of the woman. For example, if the man proposes to a 32-year-old woman, he should buy a 3.2 carat diamond engagement ring! Wow! Even if he gets em young at 18, that’s still 1.8 carats! What if you’re a late bloomer, or are simply into older women? Is a man supposed to buy a 50-year-old vixen a 5.0 carat ring? Forget it! A very rich woman told this rule to me with a straight face at a bar one day. She showed me her 3 carat, E color, VVS1 princess cut diamond as proof. Poor guy.

3) The Hotness Rule. This could be the most dangerous rule for men as it is all or none. Essentially, every man before proposing will say how beautiful his girlfriend is. The problem with showering her with praise such as, “You are the most beautiful woman in the world,” or “Your beauty makes the stars look dim” is that you are setting expectations incredibly high! Your fiancé will rightly think that if she really is the most beautiful woman in the world, she better get the biggest, most beautiful rock in the world! If I am a 10/10, then you better give me the most luxurious engagement ring among all my girlfriends. Women will pretend to tell you they don’t care what ring you get, but don’t listen, not for one second, unless you want to start sleeping on the coach for no good reason.

THE SOLUTION: THE CAR RULE FOR ENGAGEMENT RING BUYING
Now that you understand what silly rules there are for guys to follow when spending money on an engagement ring, you’ll now realize the absolute beauty of The Car Rule For Engagement Ring Buying. The Car Rule simply states that a man should spend up to, but no more than the initial purchase price of his car!

Most guys like cars. The more obsessed he is about cars, the bigger and better your potential ring. We all realize that buying a car hurts our finances because it’s a depreciating asset. Yet, guys still overspend anyway, and in a big way. If a guy making $80,000 a year is dumb enough to buy a $50,000 Cadillac Escalade (78% of his net after tax income) you should most definitely demand he spend $50,000 on a 2 carat, Tiffany Novo ring that is an E color with VVS1 clarity! Blow up his finances with glee!

Conversely, if your man is fortunate enough to make $300,000 a year like Lyndon, but drives a 10 year old Honda Civic he bought for $3,000 8 years ago, then all you can really hope for is that he buys you a nice 0.25 carat, H color, VS2 ring from Jarrod’s. Unless you live in New York City, Boston, or Los Angeles where the average carat size is 1.8-2.0, the national average carat size is around 1 carat, so stop being greedy!

Finally, if the man so happens to be the biggest nature lover on earth and takes the bus and rides his bike, well, you’re out of luck! There is no way you can demand anything more than a Push Pop ring!

 

[Johnbt]

"My husband likes order, rules, numbers."

I'm a 67-year-old man who bought an engagement ring in April. Once upon a time I was a physics major, early computer nerd of sorts, etc.

I didn't know where to start and hadn't purchased an engagement ring since 1986. I could have easily afforded a $48k 2-carat Whiteflash solitaire, but she tried on a bunch of rings locally and decided that a 1.5-carat looked right on her size 5.5 finger. Okay, great, I tried, but I saved 50% by getting a 1.5-carat F VVS2 ACA platinum Vatche 6-prong. Still a lot of money to me, but she doesn't understand me paying $649 each for bass rods either... and the reels are extra. A really nice reel can run $400 or $500. I ordered two more rods Monday. I like nice stuff sometimes. (But being retired I can get away with wearing $12 carpenter pants from Tractor Supply and t-shirts from tackle shops and marinas.)
www.tacklewarehouse.com/Shimano_G_Loomis_Conquest_MBR_Casting_Rods/descpage-LCQ.html

Anyway, tell him for me - one logical tightwad to another - that a month in a nursing home runs $7k to $10k or MORE for the really nice places. So whatever number he has in the back of his mind, he can spend it now or he can spend it later, but he can't take it with him.

 

[sledge]

It sounds like you are pretty well decided on the EC stone. However, you mentioned earlier you also like some OEC's but wasn't sure you could deal with the color, etc.

I've recently started to like some of the vintage cuts myself. There are "modern ideal vintage cuts" available by forum member @Rhino through his company August Vintage.

https://www.augustvintageinc.net/#

Might be worth a look.

 

[OoohShiny]

I have to tell you @vintageloves , given what you’ve said so far I’d LOVE for you to see/end up with a 2.5ct asscher that @diagem (real name Yoram) offers on his site. I think it might have already been mentioned, and it’s a stone that I have listed over for a very long time. It’s a D color of the finest quality diamond and you could not ask for any better of a cut. I’d suggest reaching out to him for more information/photos/videos. It truly is a one-of-a-kind diamond and would scratch that step-cut itch forever!

http://gemconcepts.net/diamond-boutique/2-52-carat-asscher-cut-diamond-of-first-water/

If you like that one, you have to check out @Jimmianne's thread on her Mildred!
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/asscher-from-gemconcepts-code-name-mildred.236249/

I think it's possible my favourite stone and ring on PS - maybe even beating the Octavia cut...

 

[lovedogs]

You have to check out @Jimianne's thread on her Mildred!
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/asscher-from-gemconcepts-code-name-mildred.236249/

I think it's possible my favourite stone and ring on PS - maybe even beating Octavias...

holy SH*T that stone is insane. I've never seen one of those. wow--definitely a rival of Octavia in terms of complex beauty!

 

[BlingDreams]

If you like that one, you have to check out @Jimmianne's thread on her Mildred!
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/asscher-from-gemconcepts-code-name-mildred.236249/

I think it's possible my favourite stone and ring on PS - maybe even beating the Octavia cut...

Yep. I think I needed smelling salts after I saw that one

 

[OoohShiny]

I want to play the video on slow-mo repeat

 

[sledge]

I want to play the video on slow-mo repeat

 

[foxinsox]

@vintageloves there is also real value in your happiness and smiling every time you look down at your hand outside of the objective value we can help you realise with finding a beautifully cut, clean large EC.
If your husband won’t set a budget, I think the posters who’ve suggested you work out what you’re happiest with and then discuss/show him are right.

Also OMG Mildred if I could afford that asscher of the first water, I would be so all over it. I LOVE the faceting of antique asschers so much.

 

[marymm]

^ Yes, you can totally get a similar ring made for you, with a smaller emerald-cut diamond. The ring above was made by Leon Mege (see link below)
https://www.leonmege.com/portfolio/three-five-stone

Victor Canera also makes beautiful three- and five-stone rings with emerald-cut diamond center stones: https://www.victorcanera.com/rings/engagement?type=three-stone

Steven Kirsch is another jeweler with high-quality three-stone rings: http://stevenkirsch.com/gallery/#threestonerings/

Leon Mege and Steven Kirsch are both based in New York City; Victor Canera is in Los Angeles. All three of them are available for personal appointments and/or telephone or email consultations. All three of them can assist you in finding the perfect center stone, and once you have chosen/agreed on that, they can custom-make your ring based on the Leon Mege ring you love in the prior post above.

Can you visit high-end jewelers in your area (Tiffany's, Cartier, Harry Winston, etc.) to try on three-stone diamond rings so you can decide what size center stone you prefer on your finger? Then, contact any or all three of the jewelers named above (if you like what you see on their websites) for price quotes?

Once you do your homework, and make your own decision as to your top choice(s) based on your style and budget preferences, then fill in your husband and let him know that the best value is represented by your #1 pick because that is the one that pleases you most, and that is what this ring is all about (fair market pricing for the diamond, top quality ring-building, and a blissed-out wife).

 

[kindred]

I think that you have gotten some great responses. Regarding color, I would suggest that you only look at GIA or AGS graded diamonds. Otherwise you don't really know what you are looking at. If you look in a typical mall store, their so-called D color may be a GIA or AGS G color or something else. You really have no way to know.

Another suggestion - If you are having a hard time deciding on a center stone size (dimensions are more important than ct. size in terms of the look), maybe buy a cheap CZ ring from Amazon or Berricle and try wearing it for a while to determine what size you would be comfortable with. 1 carat sounds like a lot, but it looks much smaller on my size 8.5 finger than you might think.

 

[foxinsox]

Once you do your homework, and make your own decision as to your top choice(s) based on your style and budget preferences, then fill in your husband and let him know that the best value is represented by your #1 pick because that is the one that pleases you most, and that is what this ring is all about (fair market pricing for the diamond, top quality ring-building, and a blissed-out wife).

This is exactly the way to represent the ‘intangible’ value