The Real Women of Pricescope

[Loves Vintage]

Date: 7/1/2009 3:12:23 PM
Author: BKmommy
First, Mariposa, prayers headed your way. You give a much needed reality perspective to all of us. I also read the thread, and like you had nothing nice to say... so I followed my mom's advice...

I don't think anyone here knows me, which is probably because I lurk more than I post.

I feel like I know so many of you (or your gorgeous rings, at least

). Anyway, I thought I'd weigh in.

Me, 35, stay-home mom of 3 kids. Married 9 years last March. About $9000 of student loans left, and some stupid credit card debt.
Him, 32, Pharm sales rep, makes between 70-80K. Has about the same in student loans left, and also some stupid credit card debt. Add in the minivan (which we swore we were too cool to ever own when we were single, LOL) and it's around $30,000 between the two of us. That's without the mortgage.

I had a BEEAUUUTIFUL .34 RB solitaire in a white gold tiffany setting that I'm still sick over losing. Some may think it was tiny, but the cut & color on that thing made it just breathtaking.

We could get a replacement now, but want to avoid more debt. Anyone familiar with Dave Ramsey? We just started our 'debt snowball' and expect to be debt free in about 18 months. Can't wait! My ring was average to maybe a little below average among my peers. When I told my sis we were engaged & mentioned the ring she said, 'What? It took me eight years of marriage to get my 1/3 carat!' LOL Her hubby is now a leiutenant colonel in the AF, and they have 3 girls and a big gorgeous new house .

I'm here because the idea of my perfect ring is ever changing, and because I love learning about and looking at all shapes, sizes, and colors of diamonds. I like it so much, that I want to study to be a gemologist as soon as my youngest child is in preschool. Right now, I'm loving the full time mommy gig!

Hi BKmommy, What's the ring in your avatar? Do you have more photos and a story about it?

And, by the way, you have my dream job!!

Sorry, I keep threadjacking in here, but I keep seeing rings I haven't seen before!!

 

[jaylex]

Date: 7/1/2009 12:56:13 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 6/30/2009 12:25:07 PM
Author:CharmCity
I would REALLY like to know what kinds of jobs you and your husbands have and how they relate to these GORGEOUS rings that have me addicted to this site. In my head you have to be a millionaire to be able to have a 2+ karat diamond!

This is the post that started this thread. Folks interpreting people''s specific answers to this question as them ''justifying'' their jewelry is a judgment that comes from the *reader* not necessarily the intent of the person responding.

ETA: Best wishes, Mariposa. I admire your strength ... and those divine sparklies too.

Amen!

This was the format the topic starter posted with, and the one that most of us followed as a guide in posting our info:
Me- info
Him- info
Us-info
Ring- info
Frame of Reference- info
Photo- photo..?

charm city asked, we answered.

"I don''t care what people''s financial situations are, nor what their education levels are or how hard they worked their whole life to afford their diamond even though they are only 22 years old"

If you don''t care, don''t read. If you had read CharmCity''s original post, and didn''t want to be bothered having to hear about our backgrounds, you could have just moved on to a different thread. The whole point of this topic was to get to know the couple behind the ering and their lifestyles. If you don''t like one of the threads, just ignore it. No one''s twisting your arm to answer.

To those who said that this thread is "unnecessary", yes it is. But could you give an example of a "necessary" thread please?

 

[b.anna]

Date: 7/1/2009 1:22:42 PM
Author: iwannaprettyone
Noneya Bees nest.

Paid cash for what he could afford at the time. No 3 month rule, no consideration for what my friends had...just picked a number based what he thought was suitable and never looked back.

Same for the wedding

- picked a cash amount we could part with without putting us in a bind and went from there.




Geez us girls will analyze everything to death.

yep, same with us! b was really into more of what would make me happy. looked around, found the ring of my dreams, paid for it, proposed, and boom - engaged! except the difference was that he paid with a CC because he wanted the 5% cash back discount and paid it off right away

mariposa: i ditto everyone here and really hope you make a quick recovery and feel healthy again soon!

i totally think this thread is justified. personally i wonder too when someone posts a huge beautiful diamond what kinds of jobs they have, their financial situations etc. i don't judge at all, but curiosity always gets the best of me. so i think this thread is great to show that you don't have to be a millioniare, or have rich families to have a beauitful ring. and conversely, you are not butt poor if you don't carry a huge rock on your hand and drag it around town with you. it's about personal preference, who you are, not what you are.

as for me:
just turned 23. started my first day of work today as a patient safety fellow at a VA hospital. i have a BS in biology and just graduated with a master's in public health. got a free ride to college so my parents decided to pay for room, board, etc. so i was very lucky to come out with no debt. however, got out of my master's program with lots of debt. also have credit card debt to pay off. currently in the process of applying to medical school, so i'm very thankful my fellowship lets me defer payment loans.

my fiance: he is 24 years old, a partner at a small web applications development firm. graduated with a bachelor's and will never go back to school. really good with his finances so he is almost done paying off school debt and some credit card debt. he loves his job, and for all you students out there, check out bibme.org - it's a FREE bibliography generator online that he and some schoolmates (now friends) built for a school project

us: we met in college, dated for 4.5years when he proposed to me with a beautiful ring. i feel so lucky to have this ring, i told him i never want to change my original engagement ring and he never thought women upgraded their rings, so we were on the same page there i am so in love with my ring and i truly feel like it represents us and our devotion to each other. i'll never forget how i told him that we should find a different ring and he said he only wanted to get me something that i truly loved and would be completely overjoyed with. we now live together in vermont in a 1br apartment with our adorable (and completely spoiled) puppy bailey!

we've decided not to look into buying a house until i am done with school (hopefully an MD in 2014). we are now in the process of saving up for our wedding (both of our parents have too many financial burdens right now). in the meantime, my sisters are planning a very low budget engagement party for september which i am so excited about!

the ring: the one of my dreams!
he bought me a tacori 2623 setting in platinum with a 0.91 RB GIA ex/ex/ex E-VS1 center stone with two OEC heirloom side stones. he proposed on June 3, 2009. i love it so much and wouldn't trade it for anything (not even a 1.8ct stone

)

 

[Buffy01]

Hey Ms. Halo , I just want to compliment your ring, I love the delicate halo around your 1.7ct. Not really into the chunky halo''s. The delicate halo makes your diamond POP!!!!

 

[Harriet]

Mariposa,
My best wishes for you.

 

[ms.halo]

Date: 7/1/2009 4:12:48 PM
Author: Buffy01
Hey Ms. Halo , I just want to compliment your ring, I love the delicate halo around your 1.7ct. Not really into the chunky halo''s. The delicate halo makes your diamond POP!!!!

Thanks Buffy! Hubby was going for delicate (no metal showing!) and I think it turned out perfect! I''ll try to take better pix sometime soon.

 

[FrekeChild]

Date: 7/1/2009 1:03:59 PM
Author: ms.halo

We live in Los Angeles, where he grew up. I''m from Albuquerque, New Mexico and went to school in Texas. We also lived in San Francisco at the beginning of our marriage.

Hello fellow Albuquerquean!

 

[ms.halo]

[/quote]

Hello fellow Albuquerquean![/quote]

Hello!

I saw your engagement party dress post and I wondered where in NM you were from...

 

[jstarfireb]

Jaylex, thanks! He proposed to me using slightly revised lyrics to that song.

Also, Mariposa, I forgot to mention in my previous post that I also wish you the best.

 

[FrekeChild]

Date: 7/1/2009 5:12:52 PM
Author: ms.halo

Hello fellow Albuquerquean!

Hello!

I saw your engagement party dress post and I wondered where in NM you were from...

Born and bred. And still here. Maybe not for too much longer though! Not too many New Mexican''s floating around on these boards. I can think of 2-3 others that are active, and other than that, everyone is mostly on some kind of coast!

 

[legra]

Mariposa - my thoughts and well wishes are with you. I''m so sorry for what you have been going through. Your rings are beautiful btw.

It''s been fascinating reading this thread and finding out a little about people''s situations and backgrounds.

Me: 34 years old, working part time as a veterinarian making about $40K/yr, mom to 2 year old little girl (the light of my life) and trying for baby #2.
My husband: 34 years old, engineer at power company earning about $90-100K/yr
I was lucky to have a full financial scholarship for college and only took out about $16K in student loans for vet school which we are getting close to paying off (my parents were able to help out for which I am very grateful). My husband also received aid from his parents for college tuition and grad school (master''s degree) was paid for through his earnings as a research assistant. We own our house (both sets of parents helped us with the downpayment otherwise we would never have been able to afford a house in our area)
Rings: ering - 0.70 ct OEC antique setting from the 1920''s, wband - Michael B. eternity band 0.27 ctw (can be seen in SMTR)
We''ve been together since we met in college 14 years ago, got engaged 11 years ago when I was in veterinary school and he was a grad student at MIT, married 9 years (tomorrow is our anniversary). At the time we got married my diamond was probably on the larger side of average of my fellow classmates and friends that got engaged around the same time. Nowadays, living in southern California I do see larger diamonds occasionally but there are plenty <1 ct rings out there as well. I think my rings are beautiful and get enjoyment out of looking at them every day. Of course there is a part of me that might like a larger center stone but I would never want to give up my orig ering and I also think that the current set is more practical for me as I wear the rings all the time including at work, in the shower and to bed. I used to take them off to put on lotion or sunscreen but I don''t even do that any more because that''s how I lost my previous wband and almost lost my ering at the same time

 

[ms.halo]

Date: 7/1/2009 5:39:47 PM
Author: FrekeChild

Date: 7/1/2009 5:12:52 PM

Author: ms.halo

Hello fellow Albuquerquean!

Hello!

I saw your engagement party dress post and I wondered where in NM you were from...

Born and bred. And still here. Maybe not for too much longer though! Not too many New Mexican''s floating around on these boards. I can think of 2-3 others that are active, and other than that, everyone is mostly on some kind of coast!

I''m on the west coast now. Where do you think you''ll end up? I don''t even have many friends from growing up left in New Mexico, but my parents are still there so we get back a few times a year (and we got married there in 2004).

 

[BKmommy]

Date: 7/1/2009 3:36:21 PM
Author: Loves Vintage

Date: 7/1/2009 3:12:23 PM


Hi BKmommy, What''s the ring in your avatar? Do you have more photos and a story about it?

And, by the way, you have my dream job!!


Sorry, I keep threadjacking in here, but I keep seeing rings I haven''t seen before!!

Thank you! No other photos, but I have a little story...
It was my grandmother''s wedding ring, circa early 1940''s, 3 microscopic little diamonds, but they do show a bit of fire in the sun! We share the same birthday, and the same red curly hair. She died at 26, when my mother was only 5 years old. My mom wore it forever, but also died early (4. My older sister got it with the engagement ring when Mom died, but on my wedding day, sis gave it to me for my something old.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 7/1/2009 12:56:13 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 6/30/2009 12:25:07 PM

Author:CharmCity

I would REALLY like to know what kinds of jobs you and your husbands have and how they relate to these GORGEOUS rings that have me addicted to this site. In my head you have to be a millionaire to be able to have a 2+ karat diamond!

This is the post that started this thread. Folks interpreting people''s specific answers to this question as them ''justifying'' their jewelry is a judgment that comes from the *reader* not necessarily the intent of the person responding.

ETA: Best wishes, Mariposa. I admire your strength ... and those divine sparklies too.

Ah, but you forgot the part of the post linking to someone else''s thread about being 25 and not being super happy with her own 1.8 carat ring. That''s what really put a bad taste in my mouth.

And Amythyste, I think it''s awesome that you saved for so long to get your gorgeous ring.

 

[Elmorton]

Oh what the heck, I figure I''ve probably said all of this in PS threads before anyway This is really interesting to read as a whole.

Me: I''m 26. My parents put me through college, I put myself through grad school. I''m an adjunct professor at two different colleges, and I also tutor, substitute teach, do freelance writing, and other odd jobs. Taxes are a joy Though I get very frustrated working part-time, I love what I do and I work hard so that (hopefully) I''ll be the one to take a full-time position when several of my colleagues retire in the next few years.

Him: A journalist, also 26.

Us: We were married when we were 24. Both of us were raised very comfortably middle class, and we are a prime example of Gen Y I think - sometimes it''s a struggle because we have the expectations of wanting to live in the lifestyle in which we were raised. We bought a (small, affordable) house last October, and are working hard to pay off school debt, cars, etc. So, sometimes we feel like our finances are tight, but I usually have to step back and remind myself that we have a pretty cushy lifestyle for where we are in life. Also, because our jobs/hours are relatively flexible, we are able to spend a lot of time together. Both of us agree that we''d rather make 30k combined and be able to see each other with frequency than 300k and see eachother seldomly. I like having that as a priority, and I''m comfortable with knowing that though our jobs aren''t high-paying, they more than make up for the $ in quality of life markers. In a couple of years, we will have our debts paid off, hopefully I''ll have a full-time teaching position, and at that point, we plan to have a child or two.

My ring: .62 EC G VS1 in a wg setting, wb is 1/4 tw in palladium. DH and I both agreed that a priority in budget was that it was easily paid off before we got married (which it was). My mom wears a ~.4-.5, so .62 seemed like it was a "normal" size to me.

My friends'' rings: Mine is the smallest of the bunch. A few friends are in the .5-.8 range, but most hit the magical 1 ct mark. No one in my age/social circle has more than a 1.2 center, though some push it to 2 ct tw. Most of my friends also have graduate degrees, and married spouses with a strong educational background as well. I notice that many of my friends who got married right after school/grad school like I did are slightly under 1 ct, and those who are getting married now are the ones with 1 ct+.

 

[writergeek]

Mariposa, you are an inspiration.

Interesting topic, with such a range of responses. I guess if it offends you, it's best just not to read the posts and move onto something else.

Me: 52, engaged for about two months - this will be my first marriage. Took 20 years and 3 tries to get through college, the third try got me a Ivy-league degree, with honors (I also worked full time). Took 18 years to build a career, but I'm in high tech and make 6 figures. Gave up thinking I'd ever marry around age 45, was wrong. LOL! Not so frugal woman.

Him: 52, divorced after 26 years of marriage. Spent 4 years alone, putting his son through college (who graduated debt-free). Found me! He has some college. 30 years in the same kind of work, middle management for a very large, diverse company in one of their manufacturing divisions. Frugal guy.

The ring: 1.3 RB, H, VS2 in JA common prong setting. Paid for in cash by my frugal guy, who appreciated but did not accept my requests to contribute to the purchase. So I got the wedding bands.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 7/1/2009 7:22:12 AM
Author: Amethyste

Date: 6/30/2009 11:33:52 PM
Author: thing2of2

Date: 6/30/2009 9:22:58 PM

Author: Haven

Date: 6/30/2009 4:00:14 PM


Author: gwendolyn


Sorry, but it gets under my skin a little bit when people get overly involved in appraising what''s ''appropriate'' for someone else, no matter how well they know you. I don''t even think it''s my mother''s place to know details of my finances, and she knows me better than probably anyone. My finances are between my partner and myself, and should be respected as off-limits.

I agree 100% with Gwennie.


You never know how people prioritize or what they do without in order to own what they believe is worth it. I''m 28, DH is 39, and I wear a 2 ct cushion e-ring, for which we paid cash. I''m a high school teacher, DH is a muscle specialist, we have collectively earned two bachelor''s degrees, three master''s degrees, and countless certifications in our particular specialties.


But none of that really matters. We know exactly what we want, what we value, and what we are willing to sacrifice in order to live exactly the way we want to, and according to our values. Others'' assessments of what we ''should'' or ''should not'' own don''t matter to us, because we are the ones who have to be happy with the lives we''ve created for ourselves.

Ditto Gwen and Haven. People can spend their money however they want. Last time I checked, PS was a diamond forum, yes? All diamonds are a frivolous luxury item, no matter how much money you make and how small your diamond is.


I think a thread on how hard we''ve all worked and how we paid for our diamonds are is more than a little ridiculous and unnecessary.

Oh ooopps, I am sorry that I bored everyone on how I paid for my diamond.... My bad!

Relax, kiddo. There is nothing wrong with your response. And no good reason for anyone to get irritated about this thread when they could simply ignore it.

 

[HollyS]

Mariposa, anyone who can endure what you have endured, and still be feisty is our heroine! And your VC set is one of my personal faves.

You have our best wishes, our prayers, and our highest hopes for your full recovery.

 

[SparklyLibra]

Date: 7/1/2009 1:22:42 PM
Author: iwannaprettyone
Noneya Bees nest.

Paid cash for what he could afford at the time. No 3 month rule, no consideration for what my friends had...just picked a number based what he thought was suitable and never looked back.


Same for the wedding

- picked a cash amount we could part with without putting us in a bind and went from there.





Geez us girls will analyze everything to death.

Big ole fat DITTO!

Same here IWPO! DH set a budget for our stone, setting, and wedding based on what wouldn''t put us out of house and home. It was THAT simple. Did we have access to WAAAAAY more cash? Yes, but we had made up our minds that we would close our home with a certain amount down payment, to keep our carrying costs reasonable. That was the deciding factor in our situation....

Oh and BTW: Me 29 this fall, college diploma in Paralegal (never used it, now a SAHM). Him: Degree in chemical engineering, works for the city, and it''s noneya damn beeswax how much we make

Interesting thread tho, lol

 

[anne_h]

I like the idea of getting to know everyone better, but I''m not comfortable with what seems to be some people judging the "I''m 25 and 1.8 carats is too small" poster.

I think everyone has a right to their feelings - even if we do not feel the same or identify with them.

So if that poster wished for a larger stone - fine. That is her perogative! She has her own life experiences and expectations that led her to her current feelings. She also expressed her views respectfully and nicely, and was not rude at all. So I am not okay with judging her just because I may or may not feel the same in her shoes.

My two cents!

 

[Lisa Loves Shiny]

Wow this thread really got me thinking. Many of us equate diamonds with wealth, with beauty or with social status. Some have other attractions to the stone. For me it is simple, and it is not about who I am now, but who I was then. Back as a child my father had a hobby in which he collected jems, and made jewelry. My mother did not subscribe to the femine things of life such as makeup, jewelry, or gentle ways. She was hard as rock, beautiful, and had but one feminine object that rarely left her person. Her diamond wedding set. She had is reset from yellow to white gold when I was a child. I was always fascinated when she took it off and cleaned it in baking soda and vinager. She would let me hold and examine it, which was a rare treat and a subtle form of kindness that she rarely showed. She was a hard, as cold, and as timelessly beautiful as a diamond. And as I have matured, I have found that I have a fetish for these brilliant stones.

My diamond collection is modest for many, extravagent for many others. I have a beautiful diamond 1.07 transition cut SI1 G in Platinum diamond E-ring. But from there I go to a .75 RB G VS1 in simple Solitarre setting, a .60 D VS Diamond surrounded by .3 carat rubies, .70 Carat J/K SI1 in Antique reproduction WG, .71 Princess SI2 in Halo, .5 RB H&A in .5 VS RB halo, plus a 3 stone 1.25 RB and numerous bands, with my newest being a .5 carat E color VS diamonds in Platinum, also almost forgot a .60 RB Ideal cut SI1 surrounded by .3 RB in YG. Plus other gem stone rings. Somewhere along the line it became a fetish. I did a rough estimate of my rings and my collection is worth retail more then my house. But of course I rarely buy retail so the cost for my collection is I kid you not- around 10K.

Regards,
Lisa

 

[Dandi]

I''m sure I''ve rattled most of this off before, but what the heck

Me: 27, RN, Asscociate Nurse Unit Manager of an operating theatre suite. Owned my first home when I was 21, sold it to take a chunk out of our current mortgage

Him: 33, Electrician, both domestic and industrial. Owned his first home at age 25, sold it for the same reasons I did.

We now owe less than half of our original mortgage on our current and (hopefully!) final home, and we jointly own a factory that we rent to a business for investment *cough*taxdodge*cough* purposes

I ADORE ADORE my ring, it''s a .77ct RB flanked by one .39ct either side in 18ct yellow gold with white gold claws, which DH paid for in cash, refusing any help from moiself. Going on the whole ''2 months salary'' thingo we probably could have ended up with something in the 2ct solitaire range, maybe? But there were/are other things in our lives that required attention and money. Heck, I wouldn''t have turned one down! It just wasn''t/isn''t on the priority list. Different strokes for different folks, of course. At any rate, I was bowled over by receiving that ring while we were paying 3 mortgages and saving for a wedding!!

 

[GossamerAngel]

This thread is so interesting! I love reading about people, just to really see a slice of the diversity of this community - everyone is so different, yet we all share a love for all things sparklie

So maybe we''re not all so different after all

Me: 28, bachelor''s degree, work as a buyer for a large retailer. NOT a jewelry buyer, surprisingly enough

Tiny bit of school debt, tiny bit of cc debt.

Him: 30, 1 year away from completing his MBA, works in the banking/finance industry for a large, multinational bank. Would might be dicey except his bank was one of the few that turned a profit last year WITHOUT any government bailout money! Small amount of school debt, some amount of cc debt.

My ring: an upgrade that was financed by an insurance claim settlement from when I sadly lost my original ring, a gorgeous 1ct round diamond in a fancy micropave setting that I still miss very much

The new ring is a 3 stone, 2ct J VS1 radiant flanked by .69cts in trillions, in white gold. Would never have been able to afford this outright as we are *ahem* not frugal savers. We own a modest home in a nice middle-class neighborhood that we bought when we were making far less annual income, which is great since the small mortgage payment in relation to what our salaries NOW has afforded us to be able to drive nice European cars, buy ourselves fun grownup toys, take fun vacations, and have fun with life. Hell, for all we know, one trip is all you get on this crazy ride, so why not?

I know it''s not everyone''s mantra, but we''re very happy.

 

[wolftress]

Oops, I just realised when I did my earlier post I left out some interesting information that some of the other posters have been sharing - what other women in their city/town are wearing. I hope I don''t annoy anyone with taking this slight segueway.

I am originally from Singapore and a lot of my friends back home wear round brilliants. One friend wears a .8 solitaire that she pairs with a semi-eternity band or plain band. Friend no. 2 wears an approx. 1-1.25ct three-stone ring with full eternity band. Friend no. 3 wears a .6 Princess cut and was recently gifted a .5ct natural pink rb in diamond halo as a push present. Friend no. 4 wears a 1ct rb solitaire (the biggest in our circle) with an eternity band. All my friends in Singapore (with the exception of the 3-stone wearer) quit their jobs shortly after getting married and now stay home to take care of their babies so their husbands are the sole breadwinners. From my understanding, they all make very good money.

In Melbourne, Australia, e-rings can range from .25 to 1ct. I sometimes see very large diamonds (to me, over a carat is large!) in the city, but they are not very common. Friend 1 wears a .5ct solitaire with plain band. Friend 2 wears a .15-.2ct rb in solitaire setting with plain band. Friend 3 wears a 1ct with approx 1ct in matching side stones and half eternity band (her diamond is from her parents). Friend 4 wears an ''illusion'' princess cut which is made from 4 stones to make up the illusion of 1 big stone, with small rounds on the side, approx 1--1.5ct total weight.

In general, I think my rings are very different from anything else I have seen here or in Singapore because they are old cuts. My halo micropave setting also garnered a lot of attention when I went back to Singapore recently for a holiday because it is so different from the solitaires that everyone else seems to wear. So far I have only seen one other woman wearing a halo and she is someone I work with on a daily basis so it is lovely eye candy for me at meetings!

I''d love to read more about ''the real women of Pricescope'' because it is so interesting to hear the different backgrounds and occupations. I don''t think there should be any need to justify our purchases - to each their own. I think it goes without saying that if we are PS regulars, we know how to sniff out a good bargain anyway!

 

[Haven]

Wow--I had no idea that writing a post that simply stated that people have different priorities would elicit snarkiness from posters I''ve never even run into before on this forum. How odd. Relax, ladies, I was just giving an honest, innocent answer to an innocent question.

CharmCity--You said I missed the point, but I think it''s just that I must not have been very clear in my first response. Let me clarify:

You said "I would REALLY like to know what kinds of jobs you and your husbands have and how they relate to these GORGEOUS rings that have me addicted to this site. In my head you have to be a millionaire to be able to have a 2+ karat diamond!"

I answered by sharing the jobs that my husband and I have. Then I added that (and here is where I am rephrasing for clarity, I''m sure I was just unclear in my original response) *I* don''t think that they really do relate to my diamond, because it isn''t about how much money we earn, it''s about what we try to do with that money. It''s about priorities, and sacrifices, and how we choose to spend our money. AND, for *us* (meaning: DH and me) others'' opinions of how we spend our money don''t matter, and we don''t take that into consideration. That''s all. No snark here. No disagreeing here.

We just do things the old-fashioned way: We figure out what we value, and we save our pennies (and stop spending them on things we don''t really value) until we can afford to buy the really important things with cash. That''s all.

I know millionaires who drive $15,000 cars, and a 32-year-old man who drives a $50,000 car and lives in his parents'' basement. It''s all about priorities, and living according to what you believe is important, in my opinion.

I love diamonds, I enjoy wearing them, and I think they''re worth the money. I know that I have family members who think diamonds are a waste of money. On the flip side, DH and I think that dining out is a waste of money, unless it is such fine dining, and the food is so special, that it''s worth paying someone else to prepare it for us. I have family members who dine out for dinner several times a week, and go out for lunch daily. For me, that would be a waste of money--I''d rather save that cash up for a new piece of jewelry.

Does that explanation make more sense? Not at all offensive, right?

 

[beach]

Date: 6/30/2009 12:25:07 PM
Author:CharmCity
After reading this thread... https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/i-dont-know-if-i-love-my-ring.118588/ ... I started really wondering about The Real Ladies of Pricescope.

I'm trying not to be judgmental but it absolutely blows my mind to have a 25 year old girl upset that her husband to be ONLY bought her a 1.8 karat absolute perfect ring, even if they are uber-rich. Instead of being mortified, I'd like to be educated.

I do understand that in different social circles and different parts of the country (or world) there are far different norms and I'm very curious about how all of you live.

I would REALLY like to know what kinds of jobs you and your husbands have and how they relate to these GORGEOUS rings that have me addicted to this site. In my head you have to be a millionaire to be able to have a 2+ karat diamond!

________________

Just for fun, I'll start.

Me -
36 years old, animator for online educational software company.
Own my house, master's degree in animation, 80+ grand in student loan debt.

Him -
30 years old, union steamfitter apprentice, high school education but will begin out-earning me next month.

Us -
We are trying to pay off debt from my loans and his past screw ups. Married for one month. In the next year or two we would like to have kids and be able to afford for me to be a stay at home mom so we try to live simply. I fell in love with my ring on a website and stalked it for two years until it went on sale.

The Ring -
One karat, old European cut, VS2, I color (but faces up completely white due to medium fluorescence which is so exciting to me), ruby halo in platinum setting.

The Frame of Reference -
We live in Baltimore and own a modest row house. We budgeted for the ring together, paying cash for half and putting the rest on a fixed, low interest credit card that we paid off in less than one year. My ring is on the large size for my circle of friends who are mostly in similar financial situations to us, but they have better toys (cars, tvs, etc.) The exception being one friend who has two karats of maul store frozen spit and my sister's which is much bigger and brighter than mine!

I really don't think it was fair for you to post a thread and make less than favorable statements about another PS member. You could have not written your first 3 lines and still had made your point. I do find this thread interesting, but wish you would have not made it at the expense of another PS member. The way it stands, this thread should be removed IMO. You could then start another thread without insulting another member.

 

[mausketeer]

If I may I think I need to add my two cents to this one..... I was also a bit um, baffled by "that other thread" that inspired this one (for various reasons) but I think some people may be missing the point of why CharmCity started this one (and I don't know CharmCity so I don't know for SURE that this is why - I am only guessing - please correct me if I'm wrong CC!). By the way - you don't work for "THE CAKE GUY" by any chance, do you??????

I THINK the whole point was that when someone comes on here and ASKS people "hey guys - I have a question about my ring" and gives US information and asks US what we think, but then THEY don't supply us with enough information to make an informed decision to give her an answer - how are we supposed to react? As many people have already said, a 1.8 carat diamond is VERY large to a LOT of people, yes? But who knows, in HER world, maybe it's small, right? (to someone who makes a LOT of money, that's a small diamond. To people who make less money, that's a LARGE diamond. It's all RELATIVE) See, for some reason, on this forum - it's PERFECTLY okay to ask a million questions about the DIAMOND itself "size, colour, clarity, percentages" etc etc." (but the thing is that SO many people on here are SO informed about diamonds that they KNOW exactly what it cost just from the specs. But they would NEVER EVER ASK "what did it cost", right? And most people NEVER say it. Why? I don't know.) And to DIRECTLY ask her anything FINANCIAL would have been the HEIGHT of rudeness, right? "Hey girlfriend, um, can you tell us, how much money does your fiance make? When he went out and spent that $15,000 -$20,000 on your ring (because we've already figured it out from the specs, right?) or so on your ring, like, did he mortgage his HOUSE to buy it? Or was that like, a week's salary to him?" Because, this is the point: that is RELEVANT to answer the question of whether "does this look small and should I say something to him about it?". IF he is wealthy and the $15,000 to $20,000 is no big deal to him then eh, you know what? Maybe it wouldn't be so awful to say anything (setting aside the ENTIRE emotional content of the argument here - WHOLE OTHER TOPIC of course). But IF he is a starving student? And he is $50,000 in debt and he's been SAVING for YEARS to buy this RING that they picked out together? NO! You do not GET to say anything about it!!! NO way!!!! But instead of just asking directly "what is your and your fiance's financial situation?" everyone dances around it. I don't really understand why finances are so off-limits, sorry....... Anyways, that's what I THINK inspired this? "What DOES someone who has a ring X large make anyways? Is there a "norm"?

 

[FrekeChild]

Date: 7/1/2009 6:02:19 PM
Author: ms.halo

Date: 7/1/2009 5:39:47 PM
Author: FrekeChild

Date: 7/1/2009 5:12:52 PM
Author: ms.halo

Hello fellow Albuquerquean!

Hello!

I saw your engagement party dress post and I wondered where in NM you were from...

Born and bred. And still here. Maybe not for too much longer though! Not too many New Mexican''s floating around on these boards. I can think of 2-3 others that are active, and other than that, everyone is mostly on some kind of coast!

I''m on the west coast now. Where do you think you''ll end up? I don''t even have many friends from growing up left in New Mexico, but my parents are still there so we get back a few times a year (and we got married there in 2004).

Eh, probably on one of the coasts. I don''t know really. Pretty much where ever we get jobs I think. I''d like to end up in the Pacific Northwest, but we''ll see. Everyone I went to school with is still around, which is one reason I want to leave so badly!

 

[asscherisme]

Date: 6/30/2009 1:21:05 PM
Author: Mariposa
I just want to say that I''m in total agreement with you. I actually had the misfortune of reading that post while I was at the hospital getting my 22nd round of chemotherapy. Needless to say I had nothing nice to sat about it, so I said nothing. The more I thought about it, the more it got to me...come on! Some people have REAL problems.

Me - 33 years old, on disability for stage 4 colon cancer, was diagnosed 4 months after marriage. Used to be a Histotech at a large hospital. 4 year degree + 2 year certification

Hubby - 35, attorney, $150k in debt for law school loans

Ring - 0.58ct ACA set into a gorgeous Van Creaynest set.

Mariposa

Mariposa, I agree with you and the original poster 100%. First off, my thoughts are with you for a full recovery.

I was appaled at the posters attitude as well and regretted reading that thread because it really bugged me!

 

[vespergirl]

Date: 7/2/2009 1:12:44 AM
Author: mausketeer
If I may I think I need to add my two cents to this one..... I was also a bit um, baffled by ''that other thread'' that inspired this one (for various reasons) but I think some people may be missing the point of why CharmCity started this one (and I don''t know CharmCity so I don''t know for SURE that this is why - I am only guessing - please correct me if I''m wrong CC!). By the way - you don''t work for ''THE CAKE GUY'' by any chance, do you??????

I THINK the whole point was that when someone comes on here and ASKS people ''hey guys - I have a question about my ring'' and gives US information and asks US what we think, but then THEY don''t supply us with enough information to make an informed decision to give her an answer - how are we supposed to react? As many people have already said, a 1.8 carat diamond is VERY large to a LOT of people, yes? But who knows, in HER world, maybe it''s small, right? (to someone who makes a LOT of money, that''s a small diamond. To people who make less money, that''s a LARGE diamond. It''s all RELATIVE) See, for some reason, on this forum - it''s PERFECTLY okay to ask a million questions about the DIAMOND itself ''size, colour, clarity, percentages'' etc etc.'' (but the thing is that SO many people on here are SO informed about diamonds that they KNOW exactly what it cost just from the specs. But they would NEVER EVER ASK ''what did it cost'', right? And most people NEVER say it. Why? I don''t know.) And to DIRECTLY ask her anything FINANCIAL would have been the HEIGHT of rudeness, right? ''Hey girlfriend, um, can you tell us, how much money does your fiance make? When he went out and spent that $15,000 -$20,000 on your ring (because we''ve already figured it out from the specs, right?) or so on your ring, like, did he mortgage his HOUSE to buy it? Or was that like, a week''s salary to him?'' Because, this is the point: that is RELEVANT to answer the question of whether ''does this look small and should I say something to him about it?''. IF he is wealthy and the $15,000 to $20,000 is no big deal to him then eh, you know what? Maybe it wouldn''t be so awful to say anything (setting aside the ENTIRE emotional content of the argument here - WHOLE OTHER TOPIC of course). But IF he is a starving student? And he is $50,000 in debt and he''s been SAVING for YEARS to buy this RING that they picked out together? NO! You do not GET to say anything about it!!! NO way!!!! But instead of just asking directly ''what is your and your fiance''s financial situation?'' everyone dances around it. I don''t really understand why finances are so off-limits, sorry....... Anyways, that''s what I THINK inspired this? ''What DOES someone who has a ring X large make anyways? Is there a ''norm''?

Oh, BTW - WAS engaged - called it off...... ex-fiance made $150,000 last year but was self-employed so ended up with about $75,000 maybe? (most of his money went back into his business). I work for the federal government and make about $40,000 a year. He gave me a $4,000 budget for an e-ring. Had one made for $3,200, didn''t like the stone, ended up keeping the setting instead, found a 1.08 carat antique OEC transitional for $2,000. Used the same setting. It was really pretty. When we broke up he said I could keep it but then said he wants to sell it. Not sure what we''re going to do with it now..... I might keep it and just give him the money for it. I love the stone (it''s a very unusual colour - or it was before it was set - it''s an O/P silver/pink. VERY unusual. Gorgeous.) Once it was set the colour just sort of went away. It''s very white for an O/P. Not a trace of yellow in it......

Mausketeer, great post - I agree with everything you said.

Sorry to hear that your engagement didn''t work out - about that lovely ring, I believe that the way it works legally in most states is if he broke off the engagement, you can keep the ring, but if you broke it off, you''re supposed to give it back (unless he doesn''t want it back). I know because I broke off an engagement 6 years ago, and I gave the ring back, but a lawyer friend of mine told me that if he had broken it off, I could have kept it if I wanted to.