Help find a vintage/antique or like new used for under 800

[HappyNewLife]

Honestly, with the shrunken budget, I would go for the LT ring too. It was one of your top options to begin with, just that people were trying to do better for $1,200 but you no longer have that. Just have your GF show the appraisal to her family (without revealing what you paid) and they will shut up.

About the band, just keep it in a drawer for now. You can still buy wedding bands together and have a special experience. The eternity band will make a nice 1st anniversary gift or a push present when you have your first baby. That would be a nice thing to look forward to.

you are a genius. He'd be all set with an anniversary gift! or a day-of wedding gift!

 

[davidorangecali]

Thanks everyone for all the great advice and offers. Yes "s&%t or get off the pot" is exactly where I am right now! I totally understand if I lose out on the LT ring because of my hesitation but I also don't want to make a hurried decision. Me personally I love the I&R rings because the question will eventually come from my fiancee and her parents "where did you buy it?" and that's why I'm so hesitant on pulling the trigger on the LT ring. Also like others have mentioned there's no returning once its bought and no upgrade policy like others have. I still am going to write her and make an offer I think but if its no longer there or if she doesn't accept the offer than it wasn't meant to be.

Also sorry for keeping everyone in suspense all weekend lol but she was with me the entire weekend and then my boss was keeping me busy all day today.

So my gf did mention that she might prefer to not do the summit hike this trip since we are having a nice dinner on top of the mountain after and she doesn't want to be tired and sweaty trying to change into some nice dinner clothes so I might be able to convince her to come back next month just to do the summit hike and propose then. And that would give me some more time and a better budget.

To lovedogs again thanks so much for your super generous offer (and a friend of mine heard the story and is trying to convince her friend at the LA Times to see if someone might want to run a piece in the paper on such a nice gesture) but I&R doesn't seem to want to budge on the price so I think if I go that route I'll propose next month instead.

To Nala: I'm going to try and find some time to hit up a few KJ's around my area and if I find something then there are still plenty of great times to propose on the trip weekend even if we don't do the summit like friday we'll be hiking to a beautiful waterfall so this could be a last minute winner if I find something that'll work.

To everyone: I'll update if anything changes or if I make any purchases and whether its next week or next month that I propose I will 100% come back and post pictures!

 

[purplesilk]

Good luck!

 

[MamaBee]

Good luck! Can’t wait to hear when you find her ring!

 

[whitewave]

I’m setting odds on she expects a proposal at the nice dinner on top the mountain. You should give her a heads up if that isn’t happening.

 

[farrahlyn]

I’m setting odds on she expects a proposal at the nice dinner on top the mountain. You should give her a heads up if that isn’t happening.

i was thinking the same thing. she wants to get dolled up for pictures, etc.

 

[justpeachy]

I’m setting odds on she expects a proposal at the nice dinner on top the mountain. You should give her a heads up if that isn’t happening.

this

 

[whitewave]

i was thinking the same thing. she wants to get dollecd up for pictures, etc.

I speak from experience. DH and I dated for 9.5 years before we got married. I also gave an ultimatum and I was 100% going to stick with it. End of the year or I’m walking.

From that ultimatum on, it was miserable for both of us. (DH had issues to say the least, but we have been married for 23 years now and everything from the marriage on has been wonderful).

It was miserable because I expected a proposal at any and every thing we did alone. Go to a park, expect a proposal. It didn’t happen.

Op.. take it from me, the longer you wait the more miserable you both are going to be

 

[natasha-cupcake]

I'm hoping he finds something pretty at Kevin's and proposes at the waterfall.

 

[MamaBee]

I’m setting odds on she expects a proposal at the nice dinner on top the mountain. You should give her a heads up if that isn’t happening.

Very true! Oh oh!

 

[Caly27]

I speak from experience. DH and I dated for 9.5 years before we got married. I also gave an ultimatum and I was 100% going to stick with it. End of the year or I’m walking.

From that ultimatum on, it was miserable for both of us. (DH had issues to say the least, but we have been married for 23 years now and everything from the marriage on has been wonderful).

It was miserable because I expected a proposal at any and every thing we did alone. Go to a park, expect a proposal. It didn’t happen.

Op.. take it from me, the longer you wait the more miserable you both are going to be

Similar experience here but shorter dating history (2.5 years). If OP wants to save up, I don't think he could go wrong by telling her that he's saving and it will absolutely happen by X date. (And maybe give her the option of it happening sooner but with his current budget.) It won't completely alleviate her concern but it may lessen her worries. I stopped caring about the surprise at 2 years in and just cared about it happening. Don't think my now-fiance totally understood that.

 

[dtnyc]

With a budget of $800 I wouldn’t let a lack of upgrade policy be a major factor in the purchase decision process.

 

[MamaBee]

With a budget of $800 I wouldn’t let a lack of upgrade policy be a major factor in the purchase decision process.

This is very true..This ring already has special meaning even though you don’t have it now because of everything you’re going through to purchase it for her. $800 sounds like a lot of money now but years down the road it may not be as tight for you. You can start saving for a different upgrade on a special anniversary..but keep this special ring.

 

[LJsapphire]

Similar experience here but shorter dating history (2.5 years). If OP wants to save up, I don't think he could go wrong by telling her that he's saving and it will absolutely happen by X date. (And maybe give her the option of it happening sooner but with his current budget.) It won't completely alleviate her concern but it may lessen her worries. I stopped caring about the surprise at 2 years in and just cared about it happening. Don't think my now-fiance totally understood that.

Similar here too. Dating for 5 years by the time of the proposal. But he took me (from the UK) to NYC in 2014. I was convinced he was going to propose there. Went to the top of the Rock. he wanted to wait for sunset... to take some photos. Went on a helicopter ride for the first time ever. Did not happen.
Went back there in 2015 and did other things. Nope. I asked him and he said he needed to save up.

2016 was a leap year so I took it upon myself to propose. He told me off for ruining his proposal. lol:
So I got a proposal on a Saturday morning at home. It was nice, sweet gesture, personal. But I wonder if I hadn't jumped in being impatient there might've been more of an event. Or maybe he just isn't that kind of person.

 

[LLJsmom]

Been married 21 years. Never waited for a proposal. Told him I think we should get married. He agreed with me. Went ring shopping together. REally don’t get why the “proposal” is a big deal. It’s not a question of whether it’s gonna happen right? JUst the when...

 

[whitewave]

Similar here too. Dating for 5 years by the time of the proposal. But he took me (from the UK) to NYC in 2014. I was convinced he was going to propose there. Went to the top of the Rock. he wanted to wait for sunset... to take some photos. Went on a helicopter ride for the first time ever. Did not happen.
Went back there in 2015 and did other things. Nope. I asked him and he said he needed to save up.

2016 was a leap year so I took it upon myself to propose. He told me off for ruining his proposal. lol:
So I got a proposal on a Saturday morning at home. It was nice, sweet gesture, personal. But I wonder if I hadn't jumped in being impatient there might've been more of an event. Or maybe he just isn't that kind of person.

I waited and got a lame ass proposal in front of my entire family, which I had already told him better not happen. Lol

So, no, you probably didn’t ruin some event

 

[MamaBee]

I have a funny story but not related to having to wait for a proposal. We were both very young and just out of school..and broke. He was in the Navy and would have to go to his first assignment in a year. I would go with him then..but like I said we had very little money..we scraped up what we could and set out for the New York diamond district to buy my engagement ring and two wedding bands. The only ring we could afford was a really included diamond. The poor thing tried hard to sparkle for me because I loved it so. As the years went on we had to go to business functions..Sometimes someone would say..gee you have a spot of dirt on your diamond...and try to rub it off! I would laugh and say no that’s just my carbon spot affectionately..My husband couldn’t take me saying that anymore so I got an upgrade!

 

[Gussie]

My DH and I were walking through a gym parking lot after a workout when he said, "so will you marry me?" No ring, not even probably planned. Then we went eat at, wait...


Denny's! Lol, married 17 years this month. I wouldn't change one second of any of it!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I’m setting odds on she expects a proposal at the nice dinner on top the mountain. You should give her a heads up if that isn’t happening.

THIS. Um, perfect time for a proposal, before or after that nice dinner. Great memory. If you miss the opportunity, she's certainly going to be disappointed or upset.

As others have said, every time you two go somewhere, and every holiday or special occasion, she's wondering when this is going to happen. It leads to disappoinment after disappointment. My daughter will have been dating the person she is going to marry for two years in Nov., and we are kind of experiencing the same thing but they don't live together (although he has made his plans bery clear to her other than the timing). I really don't get it if you are already living together...just get engaged if you love and plan to marry her.

As someone else said, the last thing you need to worry about is an upgrade policy with an $850 budget. The diamonds are usually the only thing upgradable and it's just not an issue with stones this size. You guys clearly need emergency savings since the high water bill from one month decreased your ring fund (and other things like paying off any debt like student loans, saving for retirement, buying a house, etc. before ever thinking about an upgraded ring).

 

[davidorangecali]

I just wanted to update everyone! I took up lovedogs on her extremely generous offer to let me borrow the money to propose sooner! I am getting the I&R 1.11ct Halo and I am so excited! When lovedogs first posted that ring I felt it in my gut that it was the right one which is probably why I was so hesitant with other rings.

Now since we're not making the summit hike I need to figure out where to propose. I'm sure there will still be plenty of scenic spots on top of the mountain without having to make the summit but my first idea was the waterfall friday morning! Then again maybe I should just let her dress up and propose at the dinner but I feel like thats so cliche to propose at a nice dinner!

Anyways I will 100% come back with the proposal story and hopefully plenty of pictures.

I just want to say again from the very bottom of my heart to lovedogs and everyone else who has put so much time and effort into helping me, Thank You! If there were more people like all you guys in this world it'd be a much nicer place!

 

[LittleRed]

I’m glad you took her up on her offer. You sound very confident in your decision. May you have a lovely proposal and s beautiful, long and happy marriage!

I wish you @lovedogs great joy in knowing what kindness you did for someone. That kind of kindness is rare. What a lovely person you are!

 

[ohsomethingshiny]

I just wanted to update everyone! I took up lovedogs on her extremely generous offer to let me borrow the money to propose sooner! I am getting the I&R 1.11ct Halo and I am so excited! When lovedogs first posted that ring I felt it in my gut that it was the right one which is probably why I was so hesitant with other rings.

Now since we're not making the summit hike I need to figure out where to propose. I'm sure there will still be plenty of scenic spots on top of the mountain without having to make the summit but my first idea was the waterfall friday morning! Then again maybe I should just let her dress up and propose at the dinner but I feel like thats so cliche to propose at a nice dinner!

Anyways I will 100% come back with the proposal story and hopefully plenty of pictures.

I just want to say again from the very bottom of my heart to lovedogs and everyone else who has put so much time and effort into helping me, Thank You! If there were more people like all you guys in this world it'd be a much nicer place!

How exciting!!! I think the waterfall would be a marvelous place (and make for some awesome pics). If you don’t have a little tripod for your cell phone or camera, I’d invest in one. That way you don’t have to have people around. Then she can wear the stunning ring to dinner as you celebrate your engagement.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I hope you asked what the clarity grade is on that diamond since it isn't stated in the description. I just hope it's not I1. I like the ring other than it is going to not work well with a wedding band because the halo is down on the finger and will cause a big gap. I'd be quite sure you have her try on wedding bands with it while you are in the return period.

lovedogs is wonderful to help you!

 

[MamaBee]

I just wanted to update everyone! I took up lovedogs on her extremely generous offer to let me borrow the money to propose sooner! I am getting the I&R 1.11ct Halo and I am so excited! When lovedogs first posted that ring I felt it in my gut that it was the right one which is probably why I was so hesitant with other rings.

Now since we're not making the summit hike I need to figure out where to propose. I'm sure there will still be plenty of scenic spots on top of the mountain without having to make the summit but my first idea was the waterfall friday morning! Then again maybe I should just let her dress up and propose at the dinner but I feel like thats so cliche to propose at a nice dinner!

Anyways I will 100% come back with the proposal story and hopefully plenty of pictures.

I just want to say again from the very bottom of my heart to lovedogs and everyone else who has put so much time and effort into helping me, Thank You! If there were more people like all you guys in this world it'd be a much nicer place!

Yay!!! I’m so excited for you both!
@lovedogs

 

[lovedogs]

I am also excited for you guys! Can't wait to hear about it, and I hope she's thrilled.

 

[LJsapphire]

I hope you asked what the clarity grade is on that diamond since it isn't stated in the description. I just hope it's not I1. I like the ring other than it is going to not work well with a wedding band because the halo is down on the finger and will cause a big gap. I'd be quite sure you have her try on wedding bands with it while you are in the return period.

lovedogs is wonderful to help you!

my ring is a big halo and although I don't have a wedding band yet I know I have options. I would not change my ER for the world.
1. wear it with a gap
2. wear a v. fine band that will slide under the halo
3. wear a curved band that will curve around the halo
4. wear a ring jacket
5. just wear the ER and only buy a cheap WB for the ceremony
6. wear a WB on my left hand and wear the ER on the right.

 

[LJsapphire]

I just wanted to update everyone! I took up lovedogs on her extremely generous offer to let me borrow the money to propose sooner! I am getting the I&R 1.11ct Halo and I am so excited! When lovedogs first posted that ring I felt it in my gut that it was the right one which is probably why I was so hesitant with other rings.

Now since we're not making the summit hike I need to figure out where to propose. I'm sure there will still be plenty of scenic spots on top of the mountain without having to make the summit but my first idea was the waterfall friday morning! Then again maybe I should just let her dress up and propose at the dinner but I feel like thats so cliche to propose at a nice dinner!

Anyways I will 100% come back with the proposal story and hopefully plenty of pictures.

I just want to say again from the very bottom of my heart to lovedogs and everyone else who has put so much time and effort into helping me, Thank You! If there were more people like all you guys in this world it'd be a much nicer place!

This is fabulous, I'm glad you have chosen. I hope you find a lovely way to propose.

 

[KristinTech]

Yes to the waterfall proposal! Then she can get all dolled up for dinner and show it off!

 

[kgizo]

Wonderful news!! I’m sure you will both be thrilled to make the engagement “official” and start this new phase of your lives together.

 

[JPie]

Yay! I've been following along and I think you picked a lovely ring.

Kudos to @lovedogs for the act of kindness and to the PS community for finding so many great options.