Engagement Ring - Best Bang for the Buck?

[princessv]

Hog: The way you describe your gf could be describing me. Before I got engaged, I NEVER wore anything substantial...just fun sterling silver earrings, a necklace or bracelet once in a blue moon and I NEVER wore rings. EVER. I never wore yellow gold or white gold either. But, I was picky, picky, picky about my engagement ring because it is something that I wear every single day and plan on wearing every single day for the rest of my life.

My suggestion would be to get her mother (if you want to involve her) or one of her friends to take her jewelery shopping and try various things on for fun. That way her friend or her mother will be able to provide you with valuable feedback. But its just a suggestion I HTH

 

[windowshopper]

Date: 2/20/2006 7:29:55 PM
Author: hog
Wow...I didn't realize my post would cause that backlash.

Just to answer some of the questions posed...I have the financial ability to purchase a 'better' diamond for my girlfriend since I have no debt and make a decent income. However, to me, life is more than impressing people with the perfect diamond, nicest car or biggest house. I would rather put that money towards buying an appropriate house, going on vacations and starting a family. Maybe that makes me a bad person for not succumbing to the DeBeers marketing machine and their artifical view of love.

As for buying what she wants...she wears very little jewellery (earrings in various colours, a silver necklace once in a while and a couple of gold bracelets on special occasions). She has no rings that I know of. I want this to be a complete surprise so probing what kind of ring she would like and material it is made of would ruin the surprise.

Anyways...Thank you to the few who provided valuable feedback.

Hog

you ve continued to disappoint................1)how lazy are you that you cant investigate in some clever way (I think you DONT WANT to investigate and you dont want her to have any input) and 2) I i think it is terribly arrogant to think you should pick completely for her-----------maybe she doesnt want to be surprised!

 

[windowshopper]

Date: 2/20/2006 8:12:49 PM
Author: Princess V
Hog: The way you describe your gf could be describing me. Before I got engaged, I NEVER wore anything substantial...just fun sterling silver earrings, a necklace or bracelet once in a blue moon and I NEVER wore rings. EVER. I never wore yellow gold or white gold either. But, I was picky, picky, picky about my engagement ring because it is something that I wear every single day and plan on wearing every single day for the rest of my life.

My suggestion would be to get her mother (if you want to involve her) or one of her friends to take her jewelery shopping and try various things on for fun. That way her friend or her mother will be able to provide you with valuable feedback. But its just a suggestion I HTH

this RING IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT--he doesnt get it....................(well said princess v)

 

[tulip928]

Hi Hog -

I am totally not materialistic. I don''t have a history of wearing a lot of jewelry. I drive a six year old Honda Civic and still think of it as my new car (it''s paid off and I love no car payments). But I sure did get a kick out of trying on rings with the hope of getting one. I wouldn''t count on it that she would really want to be left out of the process. Surprises are wonderful, but maybe the surprise of shopping for a ring would make her really really happy.

 

[indecisive]

I think the sentiment of wanting it to be a total surprise can be very sweet. It would probably be better to try and find out what her preferences are. I would go the best friend route or even talk to her best friend as ask her to bring it up. If you really want it to be a surprise than you have to get inventive/sneaky!

 

[XChick03]

Date: 2/20/2006 7:29:55 PM
Author: hog
Wow...I didn''t realize my post would cause that backlash.


Just to answer some of the questions posed...I have the financial ability to purchase a ''better'' diamond for my girlfriend since I have no debt and make a decent income. However, to me, life is more than impressing people with the perfect diamond, nicest car or biggest house. I would rather put that money towards buying an appropriate house, going on vacations and starting a family. Maybe that makes me a bad person for not succumbing to the DeBeers marketing machine and their artifical view of love.


As for buying what she wants...she wears very little jewellery (earrings in various colours, a silver necklace once in a while and a couple of gold bracelets on special occasions). She has no rings that I know of. I want this to be a complete surprise so probing what kind of ring she would like and material it is made of would ruin the surprise.


Anyways...Thank you to the few who provided valuable feedback.


Hog

I''m glad you clarified why you had that budget. Though, I am still going to point out how much an engagement ring means to a woman. You still might want to consider raising your budget just a little. I''m not saying spend $10,000 but $3-4k will get you a really nice stone. As far as making it a surprise, I think that''s a wonderful idea and a very sweet one.

My suggestion to you would to be to get a very nicely cut 3/4 ct. (which would be a little higher in your budget) or a nice 1 ct. if you''re willing to spend that much, since 1 ct is a very nice size and most women would be thrilled with one. Then, have it set in a simple solitaire setting, which will only be a few hundred dollars. If she loves it, then you won''t be seen as being "cheap" or as uncaring about her ring. If she doesn''t like it, maybe you could let her pick out a different setting. If you decided to do this, make sure the place you buy her first setting has a return policy in case she''d like something different.

This would be my pick for you, even though it is over your budget. It''s a .827 ct and ideal cut, so it would look substantial and sparkle beautifully. Stone Setting

If you really don''t want to spend over $2000, here a nice .70 ct. Link

Good luck.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 2/20/2006 7:29:55 PM
Author: hog
Wow...I didn''t realize my post would cause that backlash.


Just to answer some of the questions posed...I have the financial ability to purchase a ''better'' diamond for my girlfriend since I have no debt and make a decent income. However, to me, life is more than impressing people with the perfect diamond, nicest car or biggest house. I would rather put that money towards buying an appropriate house, going on vacations and starting a family. Maybe that makes me a bad person for not succumbing to the DeBeers marketing machine and their artifical view of love.


As for buying what she wants...she wears very little jewellery (earrings in various colours, a silver necklace once in a while and a couple of gold bracelets on special occasions). She has no rings that I know of. I want this to be a complete surprise so probing what kind of ring she would like and material it is made of would ruin the surprise.


Anyways...Thank you to the few who provided valuable feedback.


Hog

Thanks for clarifying for us. I will say, before I married, I hardly wore any jewelry. Even now, I rarely wear earrings, no necklaces, nothing, but I always wanted a 1 carat round e-ring set in Platinum. hubby knew this and that''s what I got

I know you want it to be a surprise but please consider trying to find out what she wants, especially if you expect her to wear it forever

I love your plan of putting money towards a house, vacations, family etc..but please don''t minimalize the importance, significance and value to an e-ring. Show her how much you love her by finding out and somehow getting her what she wants, not just what you want her to have

 

[firebirdgold]

Date: 2/20/2006 7:29:55 PM
Author: hog
Maybe that makes me a bad person for not succumbing to the DeBeers marketing machine and their artifical view of love.

Diamonds are forever is a marketing scheme, and it is true that DeBeers has sucessfully turned the focus of engagment rings to diamonds. HOWEVER it is not true that engagment rings as a concept is due to DeBeers. Engagement rings have been a tradition for centuries, or at least well over a century. This is not similar to valentine''s day which really is a marketing creation, and it still tends to be important even to women who recognize that fact. It is so hard for women not to see the e-ring as a symbol of how important they are to their guy.

I beg you, do not underestimate how important this could be to her. I really suggest playing it safe and make your budget more flexible. Think about the moment you propose. Don''t you want to take her breath away and have her eyes light up?

Does she have a sister that she''s close to? Her sister might have some ideas on her feelings towards e-rings.


And thank you Orbaya for being so understanding.

 

[valeria101]

Yiks!

Dear ''Hog'', couldn''t you just say ''budget is 2k'' w/o adding this is one week worth of your income ?? That would have made things easier ...

It isn''t hard to guess that (nearly?) everyone posting on a forum like this takes engagement rings very seriously; and with diamonds, there''s always something better out there to wish for

if you so choose. That''s what these stones are good for anyway. What else?

 

[ChooChoo]

Just to add my thoughts to this - as an independent and working woman myself (well, as soon as I graduate from law school, anyway), I appreciate my fiance''s frugality and practicality in thinking about ways to save money for us - but I would NOT appreciate it if that same thought extended to his selection of my engagement ring. It''s not a TV or a car - it''s not something you NEED, but it is something that a woman usually thinks of as the single most important gift she will receive in her whole life, and the thought that her fiance was being "cheap" (your words, not mine) in selecting it is unlikely to put a smile on her face. Personally, I think paying a little more for the ring that will reflect so much about your relationship to everyone INCLUDING your fiance is worth skipping a vacation.

It''s one thing to find the best deal on a spectacular ring (which all of us on this board strive to do), and to deliberately choose an unspectacular ring because the price is right. Focus on what you want your girlfriend to feel when she gets the ring, and work backward from there. If you''re not sure what will make her swoon, get some input from her or her friends or family, as everyone here suggests. You do not want her to end up on this board complaining about loving you but not the ring you chose. You should take a look at some of those threads to understand what that''s like for a woman - it''s a huge disappointment.

 

[windowshopper]

Date: 2/21/2006 1:04:50 AM
Author: ChooChoo
Just to add my thoughts to this - as an independent and working woman myself (well, as soon as I graduate from law school, anyway), I appreciate my fiance''s frugality and practicality in thinking about ways to save money for us - but I would NOT appreciate it if that same thought extended to his selection of my engagement ring. It''s not a TV or a car - it''s not something you NEED, but it is something that a woman usually thinks of as the single most important gift she will receive in her whole life, and the thought that her fiance was being ''cheap'' (your words, not mine) in selecting it is unlikely to put a smile on her face. Personally, I think paying a little more for the ring that will reflect so much about your relationship to everyone INCLUDING your fiance is worth skipping a vacation.

It''s one thing to find the best deal on a spectacular ring (which all of us on this board strive to do), and to deliberately choose an unspectacular ring because the price is right. Focus on what you want your girlfriend to feel when she gets the ring, and work backward from there. If you''re not sure what will make her swoon, get some input from her or her friends or family, as everyone here suggests. You do not want her to end up on this board complaining about loving you but not the ring you chose. You should take a look at some of those threads to understand what that''s like for a woman - it''s a huge disappointment.

ChooChoo-well said. No one is assailing his budget at all.............rather his inabaility to see that she might want some input or at least, value his attempt to find out what might please her. One can still surprise someone but seek to match the gift with the person''s likes/dislikes/desires especially with a gift so profound as this. I hate to be harsh but I really dont care for the tone and personality I am reading from "Hog." I believe he is exactly what his post first stated , "cheap" and worse I see a massive control freak. As such I feel he has no interest whatsoever in consulting her because it might mean he wouldnt a)have complete decision making power and b) might have to spend more than he wants. I would like to clarify again--this is not a criticism of his stated budget. My first marriage I had a thin white gold band and nothing more--ever. It didnt matter. We were poor and thats what there was. I had no problem with that. My second and current marriage: my husband said to me "why dont you look around and see what you like and what things cost and see what that is..." I did and reported back. He said "you pick because you''ll be wearing it......"

 

[Anastasia]

I don''t think there is anything wrong with surprising the girlfriend with a ring. In fact, I think it is very sweet.

I agree with Ana - if hog had said the budget was $2,000.00, without mentioning his income, everyone would have been eagerly trying to help him find the best ring for the money, and not questioning him so much. The mention of the salary, and the cheap comment, are what gets everyone riled up. If he couldn''t afford more than $2,000.00, would we be telling him that maybe his girlfriend has always dreamed of a 1 carat ring? I doubt it.

Hog - it is your choice to spend as much or as little as you would like on the ring. If you go with a simple setting, I don''t think you can go too far wrong. I do think it would be nice though, to offer to her that if she wants a different setting, she can get it. Most women have strong feelings on metal type at least.

 

[MiniMouse]

I''m a firm believer in finding out what your girlfriend would like as an engagement ring, after all she''ll be wearing it for the rest of her life, so it''s mega important. There are ways to find out, such as asking her best friend to come up with a dreamy question during their girly times together such as flicking through a conveniently purchased magazine and the friend could come across a page of rings and say "what sort of engagement ring would you want if ??? proposed, this is what I''d want". It could start a conversation during which the friend could find out quite a lot, without the motive being obvious.

As much as I love my husband, if he had proposed with a surprise engagement ring, I would have been really upset if I didn''t like the ring, because it wouldn''t reflect what I feel about him. I seriously would want a ring that I absolutely love and would want to wear and show to family and friends. You''d be very lucky if you came up with her dream ring if it was a total surprise and you had no knowledge of what your girlfriend likes. It''s dangerous. I know in a space of a year I chopped and changed my idea of the sort of ring I wanted, but I definitely knew what I didn''t want. That''s what you really do need to know.

Engagements are one of the highlights of a girl''s life, so be careful when it comes to choosing an engagement ring without knowing her taste. Whether you spend $2,000 or $20,000, it doesn''t matter, but it''s important that she adores the ring.

I still find myself disturbed by your comment "I''m really cheap". When I think of when my husband asked me to start thinking about what kind of engagement ring I wanted, I wanted to know the budget I should work to so I could choose something that I loved but within a budget he was comfortable with. His answer was for me to choose what I wanted and not think about the budget... he would take care of that, and just wanted me to have what I wanted, not what he wanted to give me. I was realistic (compared to what he wanted to spend), but I certainly felt like a princess and the fact he wanted to make me so happy really was touching. I suggest that since you can afford more, why not ask your girlfriend what she wants first, then fit a budget accordingly, it may only cost $2,000 or $3,000, but if what she wants costs you more, why not? At least you will know you have made the most important person in your life very happy. I think that''s worth more than monetary value.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 2/20/2006 8:32:18 AM
Author: Momoftwo
White gold and platinum will go in and out of style as yellow gold has. It''s about marketing and enticing people to change what they have in order to buy more. Classic will be whatever she loves and wants because she''ll be less tempted to change it then. I got married in ''81 with white gold e-ring and platinum w-ring. 10 years later we change it to yellow gold and my new upgrade is yellow gold with white gold prongs. The only real ''classic'' now in terms of e-rings is possibly the tiffany style solitaire setting cause it has been around for years and is still somewhat popular. Otherwise someone is always coming up with something new. 10 years from now some will look at their rings and think ''what was I thinking?'' Just like anythng else. Make sure she''s in on the choice because she probably has a real preference in the type of metal and style.

MO2
yep...in the mid 80''s-mid 90''s

YG were the hot item now, it''s white metals.i think YG will make a come back within the next 5 yrs.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 2/20/2006 5:53:57 PM
Author: orbaya

Date: 2/20/2006 4:04:34 PM
Author: Wren



I happen to think 18k yellow with a platinum head is very classic, and will help the budget. (do not go for 14k, that looks cheap not classic). My advice is that you either go with the 18k x-prong and a half carat diamond of no less than I color, amazing cut, and no less than SI1 clarity.
Or do the same diamond in a classic tiffany setting, but beware! Unless it''s the low-set replica of the real tiffany it will look like a temp setting. Don''t be fooled by the description ''tiffany-style''.
For instance on whiteflash.com the first few solitaires are described like that and I would have a fit if that''s what I got.

Look at the one the knife edge tiffany, you could have that done in 18k for a lot less.
Or you could even go designer with etienne''s halo ring. An 18k/Plat low halo will run you between $420 -$620, and the halo will make the diamond look bigger. It''s also clutz-proof. I bet whiteflash could match that price for something along those lines.
Personally I''d rather have something very wearable than flashy.

So basically my 14kt yellow gold six-prong e-ring setting is cheap and looks like a temporary setting, huh? Should I go to hubby right now and have a ''fit'' because this is the exact ring he got me 8 years ago? (And still wear).

Real nice.

i''m a cheapo too

both of my wife''s e-ring are set in 14WG.

 

[Dancing Fire]

okay ladies...
what if hog ask his gf...what style/size E-ring would you like? and she said a 4 ct

then what should hog do? none of us here really know what''s the right amount to spend on the ring.the only way to find out is when hog propose to his gf, if she throws the ring back at his face,then he know is the wrong ring.

maybe we can get hog to up his budget from $2k to $60k

 

[MiniMouse]

Date: 2/21/2006 4:24:12 AM
Author: Dancing Fire
okay ladies...
what if hog ask his gf...what style/size E-ring would you like? and she said a 4 ct

then what should hog do? none of us here really know what''s the right amount to spend on the ring.the only way to find out is when hog propose to his gf, if she throws the ring back at his face,then he know is the wrong ring.

maybe we can get hog to up his budget from $2k to $60k

find a lower maintenance woman, or at least one who wants to start at the lower carat and work her way up over the years to the 4ct

 

[valeria101]

Date: 2/21/2006 4:24:12 AM
Author: Dancing Fire


What if hog ask his gf...what style/size E-ring would you like? and she said a 4 ct. Then what should hog do?

Don''t think that is possible. Unless the two of them don''t know each other yet! C''mon... Asking is always a good thing

none of us here really know what''s the right amount to spend on the ring.

2k.

 

[jetmal]

I think Hog and TOMNJ should get together and go bowling!

 

[firebirdgold]

Ok, I know this seems like I'm backtracking on what I said earlier.
But when my bf implied that a $3000 e-ring was 'Unreasonable', I was extremely upset.

It would have been one thing if he said 'I don't think I can afford that in a reasonable amount of time'. Which is either what he meant, or I just should ignore everything he ever says about money. (Which is what he later told me, along with 'don't worry about it' after I said I didn't want the ring to be a burden. Can I just say the man is getting very close to being throttled?)
Anyway, the point being that since you could afford it, unless you up your budget to at least 3 weeks worth of salary. She will resent you for it. She may not say it right away, but she will resent it. It would be so much easier to suffer a little finacial pain now, than to be scrambling for ways to make her feel that she and this marriage is important to you.
No matter how understanding and how non-materialistic most of me is, there is a part that is not happy about my situation. In fact, I keep crying about it. Do you want your girlfriend to cry about it in private?? All I can do is to trust him and remember that he really wants me to be happy.
Quite frankly you don't sound like you really care about making her happy, just the minimum you can get away with so you can propose.

 

[Odilia]

Well, I wrote a post last night and it got lost in cyberspace, so I will try to restate it briefly:

I don''t think there''s anything wrong with trying to surprise her, especially with an inexpensive classic setting, as long as she has the option to change it if she wants something else. I, like some of the other girls stated here, am not really materialistic and am very frugal. Never wore too much jewelry, other than extremely inexpensive stuff. But the e-ring is something we girls have to wear & look at every day for the rest of our lives. And it is a symbol. You''d be surprised how much difference it makes, maybe even more so to a girl who doesn''t wear much jewelry. So, I think she should definitely have the option to change the ring if she wants. Especially metal color. Read the recent threads about girls who were unhappy with their e-rings. If you want her to be happy, at least get something that is exchangeable and give her that option.

 

[ChooChoo]

I totally agree with everything Wren said. And just to add, I'm guessing that most of the couples who you're friends or acquaintances with are working with a pretty similar salary as their budget. In all likelihood, that means that every ring your fiance will see will have cost four to eight times as much as her own. Now, at Pricescope you can learn how to get the most "bang for your buck", but you will never make a $2000 ring look like an $8000 or $16000 ring. Your fiance will have to deal with a lot of "Oh, that's cute" or "is that a promise ring" - and that's just what people might say to her face - she'll know that what they're thinking is a lot worse. Meanwhile, she's going to be looking at the rings that all her friends have and trying to convince herself that the difference between hers and theirs doesn't mean that you love her any less.

All in all, the two months salary thing may be a DeBeers creation, but if you spend an eighth of what most people would in your position, you won't be sticking it to DeBeers - you'll only be hurting your fiance and yourself.

ETA: And that's without even addressing what her family is going to think of you when they see the ring. I have a friend whose fiance proposed with a ring that was obviously much, much cheaper than what he could afford. She was somewhat disappointed, but her parents were heartbroken. They thought that is was a pretty good sign of how much he valued their daughter and how he would treat her for the rest of her life. She married him anyway, and I can tell you she rarely gets romantic gifts, and the parents still don't like their son in law very much.

 

[gailrmv]

Some girls do not care about their ring''s size. But a lot do. And most every girl cares that her fiance spent a lot of time and effort to choose it. Is that you?

I know a lot of women with beautiful but smaller stones. Most of them are young (early 20s), still students, or just starting off. Most everyone I know with a great salary like yours has a big sparkler. You fiance might not care, but she might feel bad and inadequate when she looks at her ring instead of happy. I love the TV analogy. Or, everyone you know drives a luxury car, you can easily afford one, but you get a civic. Are you OK with that? Maybe, if you decide it yourself. (I might do that, b/c cars aren''t really my thing, and I love the new civic.) But what if you have always dreamt of a beamer and your wife just goes out and buys the civic for you guys without discussing it with you? Would you feel like something you had dreamed of and hoped for was arbitrarily taken from you for no good reason?

About the metal, I think white gold or plat is a much safer choice today. I think the majority of younger women are choosing white metals, with some exceptions certainly. I don''t think it will ever go out of style, but if it does and she wants to change it in a few years, and you have selected the $150 solitaire, no big deal, right?

My ring did not cost a lot compared to some on this site, but my husband bought it when he was a med student, and it comprised a huge chunk of his life savings at that point. I can''t tell you how much it meant and still means to me that he made that sacrifice for me to be happy with my ring, which I very much am!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I just wanted to say that my usual daily jewelry and what I have on now are sterling hoop earrings, a small sterling cross, a stainless watch, and my wedding rings. I sometimes wear diamond studs. So I do not really consider myself flashy or materialistic. My husband told me to pick out a diamond ring for our anniversary, and he did not put a price limit on it. I brought in a 1.66 ct. diamond to look at but was a little uneasy with the size compared to what the people around me wear. And since I do not want to get into debt or clean out our savings, I''ll be conservative with the amount. That''s why he doesn''t have to set a limit! However, by letting me look around, I am 100% certain to get what I love. That would most assuredly not happen if he surprised me, unless he just picked a diamond from one of these reliable vendors, put it in a plain setting, and then told me to pick my permanent setting.

I just so much agree with the girls who have said, this ring is like no other gift she will ever receive, and it will refect on you. I honestly would be shocked and disaapointed if my college age daughter was dating someone with your income and came home with a half carat diamond. I hate to say it, but unless he was doing mission work in a third world country and devoting all his income to the poor (except that people in that line of work do not get paid nearly what you do), then I would think he might not treat my daughter well. The contrast between minimouse and wren''s experience should be enough to convince anyone how girls really feel about this.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

And DF, you are SUCH a cheapo! Wasn''t the last diamond ring something like a 3 ct???

 

[Odilia]

diamondseeker2006, you make a good point. "..I do not really consider myself flashy or materialistic. My husband told me to pick out a diamond ring for our anniversary, and he did not put a price limit on it. I brought in a 1.66 ct. diamond to look at but was a little uneasy with the size compared to what the people around me wear. And since I do not want to get into debt or clean out our savings, I''ll be conservative with the amount. That''s why he doesn''t have to set a limit! However, by letting me look around, I am 100% certain to get what I love."

Again you remind me of me, and my husband is the same way. He gave me an IOU for a new setting for our last anniversary, and didn''t put a price limit on it. He knows that I am very frugal. Even when I went to the jewelry show last Friday, he joked as I was leaving, "don''t spend too much!" because he knows me, and knows that is exceedingly unlikely. And sure enough, I bought a $4 pair of earrings and a $3 bracelet. Thus, I think if Hog''s GF is not materialistic, he doesn''t have to worry about her wanting to spend zillions. She ought to at least have the option of exchanging it for something she really loves, even if it costs more. If she did want to spend what he considers way too much, maybe they ought to rethink whether they are well matched? Just a thought.

Another thing my husband said when we first got engaged was, if you wear this ring every day for the rest of your life, and divide the cost by all those days, it is really very inexpensive.

 

[giantfan216]

I couldn''t help but read this post this morning and my first thoughts were exactly the same as everyone else on the board. I will try and give a guy''s perspective on this, but here is a little background.

I have just recently completed the process of buying an engagement ring. I live in New York and I work in finance at NBC so my office is literally two blocks away from the diamond district so it was relatively easy for me to escape and really look around at thousands of diamonds. From reading this board and doing my own homework, I have become very educated at what I think is a fascinating business. My budget for a ring was $10k, which got me a 1.5ct ideal cut asscher with a solitare platinum setting. While I do appreciate the dedication to saving money for the future etc, I have to say that there are very specific times in our lives when you need to step up to the plate and spend money, which lest we forget is the reason why most of us work so hard in the first place.....to be able to afford nice things.

Hog, it sounds like you make a very good living, which to me means you work very hard. My personal feeling was that while the engagement ring I just received cost more than anything I have bought in my life (except for a car obviously), I felt a sense of accomplishment and pride knowing I could get something so nice for the person who means the world to me. And that goes for everyone who spends $2k or $200k on a ring, price doesn''t matter, it is the thought and EFFORT that means 10 times more.

Now if you want to spend $2k on a ring, I can completely understand, however my suggestion is to put as much effort into picking out the perfect one as you would for something you were spending $200k on. Please don''t underestimate the importance of this purchase, this will set up the rest of your life so just treat it accordingly.

FYI - pics of the engagement ring will be posted in a seperate thread!

Take care everyone!

 

[diamond_quester]

Everyone has good points. I need to show this thread to my future FI

Just wanted to add that Hog''s attitude doesn''t seem that unusual. Some men who make 6-figure salaries would not spend more than $2-3K on a ring, happily drive Civics, and generally don''t care if anyone thinks they should spend more because they can afford it. I would assume that Hog''s girlfriend knows him well and would not be surprised by the ring he has in mind. (Which is a nice ring.) That said, I hope he will be flexible about switching/upgrading if it turns out his gf has her heart set on something flashier.

p.s. I vote for a platinum setting.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 2/21/2006 10:38:38 AM
Author: giantfan216
I couldn''t help but read this post this morning and my first thoughts were exactly the same as everyone else on the board. I will try and give a guy''s perspective on this, but here is a little background.


I have just recently completed the process of buying an engagement ring. I live in New York and I work in finance at NBC so my office is literally two blocks away from the diamond district so it was relatively easy for me to escape and really look around at thousands of diamonds. From reading this board and doing my own homework, I have become very educated at what I think is a fascinating business. My budget for a ring was $10k, which got me a 1.5ct ideal cut asscher with a solitare platinum setting. While I do appreciate the dedication to saving money for the future etc, I have to say that there are very specific times in our lives when you need to step up to the plate and spend money, which lest we forget is the reason why most of us work so hard in the first place.....to be able to afford nice things.


Hog, it sounds like you make a very good living, which to me means you work very hard. My personal feeling was that while the engagement ring I just received cost more than anything I have bought in my life (except for a car obviously), I felt a sense of accomplishment and pride knowing I could get something so nice for the person who means the world to me. And that goes for everyone who spends $2k or $200k on a ring, price doesn''t matter, it is the thought and EFFORT that means 10 times more.


Now if you want to spend $2k on a ring, I can completely understand, however my suggestion is to put as much effort into picking out the perfect one as you would for something you were spending $200k on. Please don''t underestimate the importance of this purchase, this will set up the rest of your life so just treat it accordingly.


FYI - pics of the engagement ring will be posted in a seperate thread!


Take care everyone!

very well said. your GF, future fiancee is very lucky. Can''t wait to see pics of the ring, it sounds gorgeous

 

[edouble44]

Why would you want to take the chance of disappointing her when you could spend a little more and put a little more effort into getting a nicer ring? My girlfriend is not materialistic at all, and I got her a ring that cost more than I would have imagined spending, but she pointed out a setting she liked and I got it. She has no clue how much it costs, but she has a ring that she loves and that she won''t be embarassed to show. You may feel that it''s a waste of money and it''s a scam and all that, but she''s the one that will be looking at everyone else''s rings and wondering why you couldn''t have tried a little harder when you could easily afford it.