justjulia
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Apr 4, 2006
- Messages
- 2,308
Isn''t it interesting how our minds work. Like, if you can''t remember, it''s easier to conveniently plug new info in and make it work, I guess. I''m tickled your mother was so resolute--like it''s your memory problem, not hers.Date: 11/23/2007 9:10:57 AM
Author: Ellen
Yeah, the memory thing can be somewhat disheartening. It''s just a huge clue that things are beginning to decline, and you can''t deny it.
I suppose the cancer could have spread, how long ago was the scan, I can''t remember...And has anyone said if this type moves fast? Also Julia, if you''re wanting to get a better idea of how much time you may have with her (as opposed to this fairly large window), I would ask the hospice people. They see this all the time, and may very well have a much better idea. As I said earlier in this thread, I was being told one thing by my dad''s dr., and another by the head night nurse at the nursing home, about dad and how long he might be with us. The nurse turned out to have much greater insight. She was spot on in what she told me. And I WISH I''d totally listened to her instead, as I would have spent every waking moment with my dad, since in the end there was so little time left.Doctors certainly have their place, but they don''t spend hours upon hours, day in, day out with the sick like nurses and hospice folks do....
I can definitely relate to the memory thing myself. Mom''s has been deteriorating for a few years now, but it''s really started to escalate. I was becoming increasingly concerened, and after last night, I am actually alarmed. I noticed the minute mom walked in the door that she had her hair done differently, but didn''t think much about it, except to think that I''d never seen her wear it that way. But hey, we all change it up, no biggie. However, she got to talking about her hair later, and to make the story shorter, at one point she said, ''since I''ve always parted my hair on the right'' (this day it was parted on the left). Julia, she''s never, in my entire life, parted her hair on either side. It''s basically always been fairly short, parted right in the middle, but just ever so slightly in the ''bang'' area, and the rest was just brushed/poofed straight back on top.
Then, she said to me later, ''You know how you asked me to write down things you said when you were little, well I can only remember a couple''. Thing is, I never asked her that.
She seems to have slipped a lot lately, almost to the point I''m wondering if she''s maybe had some mini strokes or something. It''s just not right...Her dr. appt. can''t get here soon enough, we go Dec. 12th. Hopefully we''ll know more then.
Hang in there Julia, and thank you for updating me. And as always, I''m here whenever you want to talk/vent. {{{hugs}}}
I''ve got to find mom a mid size calendar. The one I first got for her is very large, thinking she could see it better. The big ole pages are hard to turn and I think I want her to see two months at a time. Ironically, I don''t know if we have 2 months ahead, even. I have an appt for her to see her psychiatrist, to see if her medications are alright--nov 30. You are living for dec 12 and for me it''s nov 30. I''m hoping the dr can lift her spirits and keep her stable-her internist recently innocently tried to decrease some of her psch meds and she became very upset--which we fixed immediately.
How adamant is your mother about not living in an assisted living? Do I remember correctly that she wasn''t crazy about the idea? Some places are very independent--like apartments with kitchens/living rooms but there is a nurse on staff and planned activities. There are shuttles for shopping and outings, so driving isn''t necessary. (Can you tell how wonderful I think assisted living is?)