Caring for the elderly.

[justjulia]

Date: 8/21/2008 2:42:02 PM
Author: Ellen
Ok, I need advice here guys. As I posted in my last update, my mom is still in denial. What I didn''t post, is that shortly after I discovered this, I had a convo with my brother, and realized HE is still in denial too. Now, that''s not that big of a problem, at this very moment, but I forsee it could be.

I went to see the Assisted living place my mom wants to eventually live in. It''s really nice, and they do lots of things for the residents. They were having a luau the day I was there.

Anywho, I talked at length with the gal who gave me a tour. She brought up a point I hadn''t thought about. I had said mom wasn''t ready, and I didn''t feel it was time to push yet. One problem is though, she seems to be entertaining the idea a bit less about leaving home. How much less, I don''t know. It''s tricky bringing it up.

The gal mentioned that with ALZ, it might be better to get her in there before she''s TOO bad, so she gets acclimated to a different environment, and I realize this is a valid point. Also, ever since mom was diagnosed in April, she has stopped calling me about how to work her new remote/TV programming. She now call the cable company. I know why she''s doing this, she doesn''t want to ''reinforce'' the fact that there''s a problem. I also worry about her doing something harmful and not telling me. I know she''s burned up at least one pot, maybe two (and this has been awhile ago). I don''t know if she''d tell me now if something else bad happened, for the same reason. (remember, she''s legally blind also)

My point is, I really think she ought to get in there before something happens/she gets too bad. But if my brother is in denial too, I have no back up. What do I do? She has a DR. appt. in October. I just picked up new patient papers to fill out and mail back. Should I put in there that she is in denial, explain, and see if he thinks suggesting an AL in the near future is a good idea? Her nuero guy that we saw in April said that, though I doubt she remembers. But if the new guy said it, and I remind her the other guy said it, maybe it would help? Ya think?

Sorry for rambling, I just feel like I am up against brick walls here.....My brother was in denial when my dad was dying, among other things. I''m getting tired of him not admitting things that are going on. *sigh*

Ellen,
I''m sorry I haven''t read everything written in this thread yet (school has started and I am swamped) but I did read this last page and saw what you had written. I would advise you to make sure her smoke detectors are working and have new batteries and that she has a phone with large number keys with speed dial numbers programmed in. Honestly at this point, what else can you do? I remember you said she would probably forget the lifeline bracelet, so that''s out. I hate to say this, but it may take her falling and breaking something (God forbid) before some serious action can happen.
It may be time for you to take a step back and allow some things to occur. Maybe then people around you will see how dependent she is on you. Tell her to call your brother to take care of some of these appointments. And, yes, it can be arranged that he be in town for them if it''s planned. I put my foot down and had my brother do that. I will have to admit-he did not tell the dr about her cheating with the smoking or taking her meds incorrectly--but I had to let that go. Sometimes I had to ask myself why it mattered so much. Why was I so gung ho? Am I hiding something from myself? Do you get where I''m coming from?

 

[Linda W]

Date: 8/21/2008 3:50:56 PM
Author: Ellen

Date: 8/21/2008 3:32:34 PM

Author: Linda W

Ellen, my dad didn''t want to leave his house either. I''ll never forget how he cried when we drove him to the home. I still get tears in my eyes. But.... he knew my mom couldn''t take care of him anymore. He was slowly dying. Once he was there (his memory was starting to deteriorate he had dementia) he liked it.


I hope your mom will reconsider I know it would be the best thing for her, to be around other people.


I know I''ll never get my mom in one, she has already stated that fact. sheesh. she will be 82 in February


Maybe if you keep telling her, how she will enjoy it and meet so many new people. They have a lot of activities too



Linda

Aw, I can imagine how sad that was Linda.

I just had a ''Eureeka'' moment! Another point that I can make, is that she will get more mental stimulation being around other people/doing things/going out to various places. That has been said to help keep the brain from deteriorating so fast (something she agrees with as well).

That is true Ellen, they take them to all kinds of places. My dads place used to go out to a Mexican Restaurant once a week, for people who loved Mexican food. You can bet, my mom went along too

My mom''s best friend is in a facility and they take them to an Indian gambling casino once a month. The ladies LOVE that outing, HA!!!


Linda

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/21/2008 4:40:17 PM
Author: justjulia

Date: 8/21/2008 2:42:02 PM
Author: Ellen
things that are going on. *sigh*

Ellen,
I''m sorry I haven''t read everything written in this thread yet (school has started and I am swamped) but I did read this last page and saw what you had written. I would advise you to make sure her smoke detectors are working and have new batteries and that she has a phone with large number keys with speed dial numbers programmed in. Honestly at this point, what else can you do? I remember you said she would probably forget the lifeline bracelet, so that''s out. I hate to say this, but it may take her falling and breaking something (God forbid) before some serious action can happen.
It may be time for you to take a step back and allow some things to occur. Maybe then people around you will see how dependent she is on you. Tell her to call your brother to take care of some of these appointments. And, yes, it can be arranged that he be in town for them if it''s planned. I put my foot down and had my brother do that. I will have to admit-he did not tell the dr about her cheating with the smoking or taking her meds incorrectly--but I had to let that go. Sometimes I had to ask myself why it mattered so much. Why was I so gung ho? Am I hiding something from myself? Do you get where I''m coming from?

Hey julia, good to see you.

Yes, I get where you''re coming from. The thing is, I''ve already "kind" of had that attitude, to a small degree. I told her several months ago I thought she was pushing it, as far as something happening. I''ve told my brother....Then I have let it go, til now.

But I think what I will do is give the new doc a heads up on the entire situation, and see if he also recommends her going into AL. If he does, and really, even if he doesn''t (but that would surprise me), I''m going to tell mom and bro, if she chooses to stay at home, there may be consequences. And while I would feel horrible if something bad happened, I won''t feel guilty, because I will have done all I can.

I am used to not being listened to, I''m the baby, no one ever really listened to me, even though I have more common sense than anyone else in the family. But, I will have tried. And knowing my mother, she''ll say she''ll take the gamble. She did the same thing when we got her a treadmill because walking outside had become so dangerous. She kept walking outside, even though she''d already fallen once. Don''t know if she''s still doing it or not. What can you do? It''s her life....

As for my brother, I have relegated some things to him, but considering he''s in denial that she has ALZ, I don''t really think I''d trust him with a Dr. appt.

Anyway, thanks for checking in and giving me your thoughts. I appreciate it.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/21/2008 5:52:54 PM
Author: Linda W

That is true Ellen, they take them to all kinds of places. My dads place used to go out to a Mexican Restaurant once a week, for people who loved Mexican food. You can bet, my mom went along too

My mom''s best friend is in a facility and they take them to an Indian gambling casino once a month. The ladies LOVE that outing, HA!!!


Linda

Yeah, she was telling me all the places they take them, including restaurants in St. Louis, and up the River Road (scenic drive with river and bluffs), which my mom would love. I should make a list of all the pros vs. cons.

 

[justjulia]

Date: 8/21/2008 7:03:15 PM
Author: Ellen

Date: 8/21/2008 4:40:17 PM
Author: justjulia

Date: 8/21/2008 2:42:02 PM
Author: Ellen
things that are going on. *sigh*

Ellen,
I''m sorry I haven''t read everything written in this thread yet (school has started and I am swamped) but I did read this last page and saw what you had written. I would advise you to make sure her smoke detectors are working and have new batteries and that she has a phone with large number keys with speed dial numbers programmed in. Honestly at this point, what else can you do? I remember you said she would probably forget the lifeline bracelet, so that''s out. I hate to say this, but it may take her falling and breaking something (God forbid) before some serious action can happen.
It may be time for you to take a step back and allow some things to occur. Maybe then people around you will see how dependent she is on you. Tell her to call your brother to take care of some of these appointments. And, yes, it can be arranged that he be in town for them if it''s planned. I put my foot down and had my brother do that. I will have to admit-he did not tell the dr about her cheating with the smoking or taking her meds incorrectly--but I had to let that go. Sometimes I had to ask myself why it mattered so much. Why was I so gung ho? Am I hiding something from myself? Do you get where I''m coming from?

Hey julia, good to see you.

Yes, I get where you''re coming from. The thing is, I''ve already ''kind'' of had that attitude, to a small degree. I told her several months ago I thought she was pushing it, as far as something happening. I''ve told my brother....Then I have let it go, til now.

But I think what I will do is give the new doc a heads up on the entire situation, and see if he also recommends her going into AL. If he does, and really, even if he doesn''t (but that would surprise me), I''m going to tell mom and bro, if she chooses to stay at home, there may be consequences. And while I would feel horrible if something bad happened, I won''t feel guilty, because I will have done all I can.

I am used to not being listened to, I''m the baby, no one ever really listened to me, even though I have more common sense than anyone else in the family. But, I will have tried. And knowing my mother, she''ll say she''ll take the gamble. She did the same thing when we got her a treadmill because walking outside had become so dangerous. She kept walking outside, even though she''d already fallen once. Don''t know if she''s still doing it or not. What can you do? It''s her life....

As for my brother, I have relegated some things to him, but considering he''s in denial that she has ALZ, I don''t really think I''d trust him with a Dr. appt.

Anyway, thanks for checking in and giving me your thoughts. I appreciate it.

What if one day you casually took her over to the place and naively said, "oh, look, this is such n such..let''s go in and just look around for a min..." (Having set it up in advance for a tour.) Would she get out of the car and look? Anyway, she would probably come up with a littany of reasons not to like it. Oh Ellen, you are between a rock and a hard place.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 6:35:40 AM
Author: justjulia
What if one day you casually took her over to the place and naively said, 'oh, look, this is such n such..let's go in and just look around for a min...' (Having set it up in advance for a tour.) Would she get out of the car and look? Anyway, she would probably come up with a littany of reasons not to like it. Oh Ellen, you are between a rock and a hard place.

Great idea, except, she's already been through a couple times.

That's why I went there in the first place, as she has said this is where she wants to end up. Now it's just a matter of getting her there!

And I forgot to mention, this place has an ALZ wing, so when she got too bad to live in an apt., we could just move her to the other dept., which would be nice. She can stay there until she's literally bedridden, then we would have to put her in a NH. I just need to compare prices, if there's not a horrible difference, I'll let her stay there as long as she can.

 

[Linda W]

Ellen,

I hope your brother will give you support at some point. My brother is two and a half years younger then me and very bossy. It took him a long time, to see and even admit that my parents were going down hill. He lived in his own little world for a long time. I used to want to kick him in his butt to wake him up.

Is your brother around her enough to see the changes in her???


Linda

 

[Skippy123]

Ellen, I am sorry, I pray you can get her in sooner then later so she has time to adjust like you say! I am sending you a hug!

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 12:35:09 PM
Author: Linda W
Ellen,

I hope your brother will give you support at some point. My brother is two and a half years younger then me and very bossy. It took him a long time, to see and even admit that my parents were going down hill. He lived in his own little world for a long time. I used to want to kick him in his butt to wake him up.

Is your brother around her enough to see the changes in her???


Linda

That's what's funny. I was telling the gal at the AL place about my brother, and she asked if he was younger. No, he's actually 11 years older than me..... And he's down once a month, definitely often enough that he should see it, but doesn't seem to. And yes, I am getting close to "kicking some butt" myself. He better wake soon.

(you'd think going through my dad's deterioration would have given him some insight)



Thank you Skippers!

 

[Linda W]

I don''t think they really WANT to see it. My brother didn''t come around much at all. Now he is over my mom''s house all the time. I think he feels guilty now. Before, he used to see my parents, maybe every few months.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 1:27:49 PM
Author: Linda W
I don''t think they really WANT to see it. My brother didn''t come around much at all. Now he is over my mom''s house all the time. I think he feels guilty now. Before, he used to see my parents, maybe every few months.

No, I''m sure they don''t. Guess what? Neither do I! But what if I just stuck my head in the sand and refused to see everything that was going on, where would we have been/are now? That''s such a cop out. And I think that''s part of the problem. He doesn''t really have to deal with much, certainly not on an everyday basis. He just lives his own life, pops down for a short stay, ignores everything and goes back home to his own world.

Like I said before, I really thought after he saw how wrong he was about my dad dying, that he would get a clue. It really kind of blows me away that he is doing this all over again.

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[Linda W]

Yep, that is what my brother used to do too. He still lives in his own little world, but at least he is more active in mom''s life now. I used to tell him he was selfish and to wakeup

He and I still bump heads all of the time. Is you brother willing to talk to your mom''s Dr., or is that a stupid question on my part???

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 1:44:19 PM
Author: Linda W
Yep, that is what my brother used to do too. He still lives in his own little world, but at least he is more active in mom''s life now. I used to tell him he was selfish and to wakeup

He and I still bump heads all of the time. Is you brother willing to talk to your mom''s Dr., or is that a stupid question on my part???

B I NGO B I NGO

And you are right, imo, it IS selfish.

 

[justjulia]

Would she be up for someone to come by daily to physically check on her? I wonder how feasible this would be. I know that when mom had her nurse come over twice a week for bathing, she went along with it willingly. If I did it, she would make excuses that she was too tired and would never do it. Does your doctor or hospital have possible leads for someone/agency that could do this? Then, the house would be checked, and she''d get personal hygiene issues scheduled and, any time you spend with her would not be all chores. Would this work as a temporary option?

 

[Ellen]

That''s the thing julia, she''s at this "inbetween" stage. She''s not perfectly fine, but she''s really not so bad that an actual check in is necessary. What''s really needed is for her to be in a place where she can carry on by herself, yet, have watchful eyes nearby if need be. Do you know what I mean?

She''s still quite capable of bathing, cleaning, cooking (though to a less extent now, but she''s managing).

There are agencies around here. I don''t exactly know what shape she needs to be in to qualify, but at this point there really wouldn''t be anything for them to do.


I have been thinking though, if she insists on staying at home for now, I''m going to get her one of those Lifeline medic alert necklaces.

 

[justjulia]

Date: 8/22/2008 2:39:18 PM
Author: Ellen
That''s the thing julia, she''s at this ''inbetween'' stage. She''s not perfectly fine, but she''s really not so bad that an actual check in is necessary. What''s really needed is for her to be in a place where she can carry on by herself, yet, have watchful eyes nearby if need be. Do you know what I mean?

She''s still quite capable of bathing, cleaning, cooking (though to a less extent now, but she''s managing).

There are agencies around here. I don''t exactly know what shape she needs to be in to qualify, but at this point there really wouldn''t be anything for them to do.


I have been thinking though, if she insists on staying at home for now, I''m going to get her one of those Lifeline medic alert necklaces.

Dang tootin'' yeah! Those lifeline necklaces are THE thing girl. I''m tellin'' you. Now, I will tell you that my mother found it annoying when she took her frequent naps to have it around her neck....then she''d forget to put it back on and found herself making trips back and forth because she FORGOT where the heck she took it off!!! So, get the BRACELET option instead. It STAYS ON even when bathing!! Also, they explained to me that she/we could push the button even if we just wanted to talk with someone, wanted to know the date or time, etc... That way, when we went away for an evening or overnight, we were a lot less worried.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 2:49:25 PM
Author: justjulia
Dang tootin'' yeah! Those lifeline necklaces are THE thing girl. I''m tellin'' you. Now, I will tell you that my mother found it annoying when she took her frequent naps to have it around her neck....then she''d forget to put it back on and found herself making trips back and forth because she FORGOT where the heck she took it off!!! So, get the BRACELET option instead. It STAYS ON even when bathing!! Also, they explained to me that she/we could push the button even if we just wanted to talk with someone, wanted to know the date or time, etc... That way, when we went away for an evening or overnight, we were a lot less worried.

Awesome. That''s what I need then. Thanks for the info, which you may have given me before and I forgot.

 

[justjulia]

Date: 8/22/2008 2:59:06 PM
Author: Ellen

Date: 8/22/2008 2:49:25 PM
Author: justjulia
Dang tootin'' yeah! Those lifeline necklaces are THE thing girl. I''m tellin'' you. Now, I will tell you that my mother found it annoying when she took her frequent naps to have it around her neck....then she''d forget to put it back on and found herself making trips back and forth because she FORGOT where the heck she took it off!!! So, get the BRACELET option instead. It STAYS ON even when bathing!! Also, they explained to me that she/we could push the button even if we just wanted to talk with someone, wanted to know the date or time, etc... That way, when we went away for an evening or overnight, we were a lot less worried.

Awesome. That''s what I need then. Thanks for the info, which you may have given me before and I forgot.

Good. I''m glad in some tiny way I could help. The bracelet is made of gortex-y like material with a velcro "buckle." Light weight and washable/waterproof. Mom adapted to it very well.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 3:06:22 PM
Author: justjulia
Good. I''m glad in some tiny way I could help. The bracelet is made of gortex-y like material with a velcro ''buckle.'' Light weight and washable/waterproof. Mom adapted to it very well.

You did!!

As for mom adapting to it, she''s a pill, so I don''t expect this to go easily. I don''t care, she''s gonna wear it.

Hopefully, I''m pleasantly surprised....

 

[Linda W]

LOL Ellen, my mom is a Pill also. I wanted to get her one also and she was soooooooooooo insulted. She said if I walked into HER house with one, she would instantly throw it in the garbage can. Geez, I never brought it up again.

That is what I get for trying to help the lady.

Linda

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 3:13:56 PM
Author: Linda W
LOL Ellen, my mom is a Pill also. I wanted to get her one also and she was soooooooooooo insulted. She said if I walked into HER house with one, she would instantly throw it in the garbage can. Geez, I never brought it up again.

That is what I get for trying to help the lady.

Linda

Guess not!


It''s like I keep saying, by doing all this, we''re earning our angel wings.

 

[justjulia]

Our situation was to the point where mom was taking a very small dose of under the tongue morphine, to ease her breathing, and I was worried sick she would get a dizzy spell and slip and fall. Otherwise she was very alert and eating well, mobile, etc... She found the lifeline to be a relief and welcomed it--but again, she understood her physical limitations.

Before Lifeline my mother carried around her cell phone in her pocket. But, she''d forget it. When I''d call and she didn''t answer, I''d rush home from work only to find it was in her coat pocket back in the bedroom or outside. Mom was always furious that the cell phone reception was iffy or dropped...she was easily angry...so the cell phone idea was sort of short lived. Lifeline was set up to call me immediately if she ever contacted them (at the same time as an ambulance, etc).

I guess they have to buy into the whole idea that it is a benefit, not a leash.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/22/2008 6:02:58 PM
Author: justjulia
Our situation was to the point where mom was taking a very small dose of under the tongue morphine, to ease her breathing, and I was worried sick she would get a dizzy spell and slip and fall. Otherwise she was very alert and eating well, mobile, etc... She found the lifeline to be a relief and welcomed it--but again, she understood her physical limitations.

Before Lifeline my mother carried around her cell phone in her pocket. But, she''d forget it. When I''d call and she didn''t answer, I''d rush home from work only to find it was in her coat pocket back in the bedroom or outside. Mom was always furious that the cell phone reception was iffy or dropped...she was easily angry...so the cell phone idea was sort of short lived. Lifeline was set up to call me immediately if she ever contacted them (at the same time as an ambulance, etc).

I guess they have to buy into the whole idea that it is a benefit, not a leash.

See, she can''t even see well enough for a cell phone really, and she would absolutely forget where it was/lose it. I bought her one of those "My lil reminder" things, cheap though it was, I knew it could help her some. And I think it might have, til she lost it, which wasn''t all that long after I got it. lol

She definitely needs something that can stay on, if she''ll leave it on. But yeah, I''m going to try and stress the comfort/security it can give her.

Are they very expensive julia?

 

[justjulia]

Date: 8/22/2008 7:10:17 PM
Author: Ellen

Date: 8/22/2008 6:02:58 PM
Author: justjulia
Our situation was to the point where mom was taking a very small dose of under the tongue morphine, to ease her breathing, and I was worried sick she would get a dizzy spell and slip and fall. Otherwise she was very alert and eating well, mobile, etc... She found the lifeline to be a relief and welcomed it--but again, she understood her physical limitations.

Before Lifeline my mother carried around her cell phone in her pocket. But, she''d forget it. When I''d call and she didn''t answer, I''d rush home from work only to find it was in her coat pocket back in the bedroom or outside. Mom was always furious that the cell phone reception was iffy or dropped...she was easily angry...so the cell phone idea was sort of short lived. Lifeline was set up to call me immediately if she ever contacted them (at the same time as an ambulance, etc).

I guess they have to buy into the whole idea that it is a benefit, not a leash.

See, she can''t even see well enough for a cell phone really, and she would absolutely forget where it was/lose it. I bought her one of those ''My lil reminder'' things, cheap though it was, I knew it could help her some. And I think it might have, til she lost it, which wasn''t all that long after I got it. lol

She definitely needs something that can stay on, if she''ll leave it on. But yeah, I''m going to try and stress the comfort/security it can give her.

Are they very expensive julia?

I can''t remember Lifeline''s'' cost exactly. It was like $50 per month, or something like that. They had to come drill holes through the kitchen wall to the outside to connect with the phone line. They provide a phone with large number pads that talks back to you when you push the bracelet/necklace button and talk into the air. They speaker-phone answer with "May I help you Ms. so n so?"

 

[Ellen]

Ok, cool. Thanks!!

 

[Kaleigh]

Hi guys, just checking in. I called my Dad to check on my Mom. She had work done on her teeth, she wasn''t doing well. Saw her a few days ago. She''s having some stomach problems, all is being handled. What got me sad was when I mentioned that DD is coming home tomorrow. I said yeah we are doing the whole Ikea thing, buying the furniture for college. I said remember how I had bought mine way back and had all the wood laid out over the front hallway?? He said you did??

Now come on, I remember making a huge joke about it, (this was when I was 20 for my first apartment.), no wonder this stuff is so cheap, you have to assemble it yourself. He got a chuckle out of it. He has no memory issues. Every time I mention something about what the kids did, or something my brother and I did. Or god forbid what Mom did, it''s always, no I didn''t know that. He laughed tonight saying the only thing he remembers is him coming home to me having parties and having all my friends over. Umm, then that would have been me at 18? It''s like time stood still after that to him. I just find that sad, and odd.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 8/25/2008 9:03:11 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Hi guys, just checking in. I called my Dad to check on my Mom. She had work done on her teeth, she wasn''t doing well. Saw her a few days ago. She''s having some stomach problems, all is being handled. What got me sad was when I mentioned that DD is coming home tomorrow. I said yeah we are doing the whole Ikea thing, buying the furniture for college. I said remember how I had bought mine way back and had all the wood laid out over the front hallway?? He said you did??

Now come on, I remember making a huge joke about it, (this was when I was 20 for my first apartment.), no wonder this stuff is so cheap, you have to assemble it yourself. He got a chuckle out of it. He has no memory issues. Every time I mention something about what the kids did, or something my brother and I did. Or god forbid what Mom did, it''s always, no I didn''t know that. He laughed tonight saying the only thing he remembers is him coming home to me having parties and having all my friends over. Umm, then that would have been me at 18? It''s like time stood still after that to him. I just find that sad, and odd.

Lisa, I am sorry about your mom. I am sorry, that is pretty crappy; can you ask why he doesn''t remember or what do you think? I would be frustrated! Very strange.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 8/25/2008 9:11:39 PM
Author: Skippy123

Date: 8/25/2008 9:03:11 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Hi guys, just checking in. I called my Dad to check on my Mom. She had work done on her teeth, she wasn''t doing well. Saw her a few days ago. She''s having some stomach problems, all is being handled. What got me sad was when I mentioned that DD is coming home tomorrow. I said yeah we are doing the whole Ikea thing, buying the furniture for college. I said remember how I had bought mine way back and had all the wood laid out over the front hallway?? He said you did??

Now come on, I remember making a huge joke about it, (this was when I was 20 for my first apartment.), no wonder this stuff is so cheap, you have to assemble it yourself. He got a chuckle out of it. He has no memory issues. Every time I mention something about what the kids did, or something my brother and I did. Or god forbid what Mom did, it''s always, no I didn''t know that. He laughed tonight saying the only thing he remembers is him coming home to me having parties and having all my friends over. Umm, then that would have been me at 18? It''s like time stood still after that to him. I just find that sad, and odd.

Lisa, I am sorry about your mom. I am sorry, that is pretty crappy; can you ask why he doesn''t remember or what do you think? I would be frustrated! Very strange.

Once Mom is better, I will ask him Skippy. I think part of it is denial, part of it is that he pretends to not remember. Hard to say really. He''s one of those guys where it''s all about him. Like we never talk about me till the very end of the convo and by then his attention span is gonzo.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 8/25/2008 9:24:39 PM
Author: Kaleigh

Date: 8/25/2008 9:11:39 PM
Author: Skippy123

Lisa, I am sorry about your mom. I am sorry, that is pretty crappy; can you ask why he doesn''t remember or what do you think? I would be frustrated! Very strange.

Once Mom is better, I will ask him Skippy. I think part of it is denial, part of it is that he pretends to not remember. Hard to say really. He''s one of those guys where it''s all about him. Like we never talk about me till the very end of the convo and by then his attention span is gonzo.

Well, next time bring it up in the beginning; you do such wonderful things for them. Hugs!!! I hope your mom feels better soon.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/25/2008 9:24:39 PM
Author: Kaleigh

Date: 8/25/2008 9:11:39 PM
Author: Skippy123

Lisa, I am sorry about your mom. I am sorry, that is pretty crappy; can you ask why he doesn''t remember or what do you think? I would be frustrated! Very strange.

Once Mom is better, I will ask him Skippy. I think part of it is denial, part of it is that he pretends to not remember. Hard to say really. He''s one of those guys where it''s all about him. Like we never talk about me till the very end of the convo and by then his attention span is gonzo.

I think that''s possible Lisa. And, he actually may have forgotten some things. I''m sorry.