I'm a widow

[luv2sparkle]

PB, I can totally see why you are exhausted. Holy cow, I felt like I needed a nap just reading about it and catching up. I can't even imagine what it has been like for you living it.
I hope and pray things start getting straightened out and you can at least have some relief from that side of things. All the family stuff might take like forever.... You have a lot on your plate, and I wish someone could lighten your load a little bit, but it seems like this is how it has to be worked out. Hugs and prayer.

 

[Cozystitches]

Hey PB,

I've been off PS forever, and I'm terribly sorry for your loss. Hugs to you!

Cozy

 

[mary poppins]

Yay for being done with the DMV! Grocery bingo sounds like fun!

The last few months have been so stressful for you in a variety of ways. Part of sleeping is a way of self-protection for body and mind. It sounds like your body is taking good care of you as you move through emotional stages and physical tasks. It can be hard, but take the time you need regardless of what others around you say. None of them have been in your unique situation.

I hope the universe lines up to enable you to accomplish another item on your to do list this week.

 

[PintoBean]

Reeling... digesting. I got the explanation letter from the insurance company explaining why the accident benefit was denied. It looks pretty clear to me unless the medical examiner's report contradicts their rationale.

It would have been an extra 2x salary check. It is what it is...

 

[valeria101]

If the medical examiner's report contradicts their rationale, do you have recourse ?

Ar the rate paperwork moves around you - two months of wages might as well cover some of your labour !

 

[MissGotRocks]

Reeling... digesting. I got the explanation letter from the insurance company explaining why the accident benefit was denied. It looks pretty clear to me unless the medical examiner's report contradicts their rationale.

It would have been an extra 2x salary check. It is what it is...

Well, I suppose it's always possible that there could be a contradiction. It is a lot of money to be denied so I hope they are very sure of what they are saying.

 

[mary poppins]

Reeling... digesting. I got the explanation letter from the insurance company explaining why the accident benefit was denied. It looks pretty clear to me unless the medical examiner's report contradicts their rationale.

It would have been an extra 2x salary check. It is what it is...

If the ME report does not support the insurance company's reason for denail, you should schedule a free consultation with an experienced auto insurance coverage attorney to inquire about sending a demand letter (demanding coverage) and (if no or negative response) suing based on improper denial. The lawsuit would seek a declaratory judgment where the court determines there is coverage and requires the company to pay. An attorney would likely take the case on a contingency fee basis meaning rather than pay the attorney an hourly rate, you would pay costs of filing and the attorney's payment would be a percentage of the amount recovered from the company.

Much as you may not want to see the ME report, which I totally understand, I hope it arrives soon so you can figure out the coverage issue ASAP.

 

[PintoBean]

If the medical examiner's report contradicts their rationale, do you have recourse ?

Ar the rate paperwork moves around you - two months of wages might as well cover some of your labour !

Even more - 2 year's salary

 

[mary poppins]

Oops, went back to try to edit my post to say "could" instead of "should" as I didn't mean to tell you what to do. Just presenting an option for you depending on the circumstances and trying to ease your mind. Hopefully I didn't offend. Hoping for the best for you.

 

[valeria101]

Even more - 2 year's salary

Their rushing to deny before your receiving the ME is quite petty ... - hopefully useless to them !

[Why did I think of 2 months ... ]

 

[MollyMalone]

Their rushing to deny before your receiving the ME is quite petty ... - hopefully useless to them !

No reason to think the insurance company was aware that PB did not already have a copy of the ME's report.

PB, I am so very sorry that the letter of denial is difficult to grapple with. How we wish you could have been spared all of this... that he were still alive... that you two could still be partnering helpmates to each other.

{gentle hugs}
Molly

 

[valeria101]

No reason to think the insurance company was aware that PB did not already have a copy of the ME's report.

I was thinking that they would not have had it either, although the information seems relevant, from what PB wrote. I am asuming that the ME's report is released firstly to the next of kin, so the insurer could not have had access to the respective information before PB.

Why this caught my eye: around here, I'd be the one schlepping such paper to insurers who are obligated to acknowledge receipt formally etc. so it is obvious that everyone has the same information. The process is supremely annoying, so its pretext - that it is important that parties agree, mechanistically, on the facts - got burned into my immagination.

From up this thread, I remember that the ME's report will arrive to a third party, and that a lawyer is involved for some other chores already - the right kind of people I would call on to follow up with the insurer, perhaps much like @mary poppins says.

... not that I know what am I talking about, I was quite happy to see that there were no more news on this thread for a couple of days - so when the new wave hit, I found myself writing ... .(

 

[MollyMalone]

No, the ME's report is not automatically released to the next of kin in New York -- not every one wants or needs it; it must be formally requested by the next of kin (and anyone else who can demonstrate they have a proper interest, like the life insurance company here; New York does not deem its ME reports to be public information, and so, ME reports are not available to the general public).

Lawyers & insurance companies must pay for ME reports; most (maybe all) of the ME Offices in NY will provide one copy to the next of kin free of charge.

 

[cmd2014]

Reeling... digesting. I got the explanation letter from the insurance company explaining why the accident benefit was denied. It looks pretty clear to me unless the medical examiner's report contradicts their rationale.

It would have been an extra 2x salary check. It is what it is...

PB, are you saying that they're saying that this wasn't somehow an accident? If so, how are you hanging in? I know you've expressed worry that maybe it wasn't an accident before, so I'm just checking in (ETA: even though I'm assuming the denial of benefit is because of some sort of technicality in the policy).

 

[minousbijoux]

I can just imagine that every single obstacle/piece of new information must feel like a gut punch.

 

[TooPatient]

PB -- How are you doing? Worried about you after that letter. I hope it was just a technicality that can be appealed and is just another of the "you have got to be kidding me" moments.

 

[PintoBean]

PB -- How are you doing? Worried about you after that letter. I hope it was just a technicality that can be appealed and is just another of the "you have got to be kidding me" moments.

I am waiting for the toxicology report to come to verify the data against what was provided in the explanation letter. It is what it is... now ladies and gentlemen sweeten my 2017 by sending me the winning lotto tickets!!!

 

[Calliecake]

Pinto, I hope in your heart you know no matter what the insurance company or medical examiners report show or what they say, this was an accident. You knew Mike. These people did not. Please remember that. Hugs

 

[cmd2014]

Oh PB, if this was denied because he had alcohol in his system (which is a common reason that auto insurance claims, including accidental death benefits, can be denied), I can only imagine how you might feel. There is no judgement on anything you might want to express here, towards anything or anyone.

I'm with Calliecake on this. Just because the toxicology report might come back positive, does NOT mean that this wasn't an accident. It just means that the insurance company might have grounds in their policy to deny a claim made under these circumstances. Which is sh*tty for all sorts of reasons in and of itself.

 

[mtsapphirelovingannie]

PintoBean, I wish I could send you the winning lotto numbers! I am sending you warm thoughts.

 

[yennyfire]

Aww PB. That's just shitty. No other word for it. Can the universe please just give you a break??? C'mon already! Sending gentle hugs...

 

[tyty333]

Sending you gentle hugs PB...you've been through so much and I know this is just one more thing that you have to work through. You've been able
to handle everything that's been shoved your way and you will get through this too. Sending healthy, healing dust and hugs your way.

 

[lovedogs]

I love you, PB!!! Agree with all the others that even IF he had alcohol in his system is *DOES NOT* mean what happened wasn't an accident.

 

[Puppmom]

PB, thinking of you as you navigate through this. I agree with the others, if the toxicology report does show alcohol, it doesn’t mean this wasn’t an accident. I’m sorry though that there’s even any question. I cannot begin to imagine how exhausting this is for you.

 

[whitewave]

It seems to me if there was alcohol in his system, it is more likely it was an accident. HUGS, PInto.

 

[valeria101]

It seems to me if there was alcohol in his system, it is more likely it was an accident.

This is the law here.

 

[MissGotRocks]

PB, I hope you are doing OK since receiving this letter. Another process of sorts for you to have to work through cope with. Just want you to know that you are thought of often and I hope that you've had other things to do and think about over the weekend. Big hugs to you - I get a bit nudgy when we don't hear from you - worrying is my pastime - lol!!

 

[PintoBean]

As you know I get frustrated when I get derailed in my sleep progress. A couple more things happened this week. One being my dad showing up with the dog, Bean, without my permission and scaring and disrupting my cats and household. I ended up locking the storm door on him and telling him to leave.

The insurance company that wants me to work for them - they sent me a text. I was excited about trying on the financial advisor hat until my parents rained on the parade, especially when my dad went off on the day of the interment. Then I lost confidence in myself and became anxious that I couldn't hit the commission milestones. I'm trying to convince myself that my original plan is to not work and take it easy = $0 earned. So what if I don't make my commission monthly? $0. Same difference except that now I'll have set a goal and gone for it.

I tell myself all this but it's still stressing me out.

The medical examiner's report arrived with Saturday's mail. I just couldn't bring myself to remove the mail from the mailbox. I'm going to reach out to the insurance agent and my attorney tomorrow to see who's available first to compare what's in the ME's report with what's in the explanation for denying the accidental benefit.

I started Taichi on Thursday - yay. I was supposed to end an enrichment lecture on Saturday but I overslept - oh well...

Saturday I went to dinner for two friends' birthdays. We went to a local bar later and it was soooo terrible with terrible karaoke. I saw that friend of a friend who's mom recently died and felt a twinge of jealousy Bc he walked in and knew almost everyone. He's got so much support in town with family and friends. I envy him.

 

[PintoBean]

Ooo one major change I'm not pleased with. My cleaning lady officially quit on my neighbor and I. She has a new gig that demands 3days a week of her time. Shitty. She's nice, does a nice job, likes my cats and my cats like her. I trusted her enough to leave when she was mid cleaning and ask her to shut the front door behind her.

 

[valeria101]

I was excited about trying on the financial advisor hat until my parents rained on the parade, especially when my dad went off on the day of the interment.

I am still curious about this possibility !

Admitedly, your progenitors know when & how to step on your soft parts ...

he walked in and knew almost everyone. He's got so much support in town with family and friends. I envy him.

My two friends with a caggle like that, like to have lunch to ... get away from their crowds which I do want to meet ! I need a deal with them: one my way for you, one your way for me ...

2c