Bidet - ooh or eww?

[somethingshiny]

Date: 2/23/2010 6:20:26 PM
Author: charbie

Date: 2/23/2010 5:43:26 PM

Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 5:40:53 PM


Author: IndyLady


If you got fecal matter on your hands, would you just wipe them off with a paper towel and walk away? Probably not. So why are your other parts any different?

Well ... I don''t eat with my *** for starters. Also: don''t handle door knobs or do food prep with it either!

Omg deco....that comment just made my day.

hilarious!

And, FWIW, it seems a lot of people use baby wipes, so we''re still CLEAN! It''s not like we''re walking around with dingleberries while the bidet users are squeaky clean.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 2/23/2010 6:07:38 PM
Author: IndyLady
If you got fecal matter on your elbows, are you saying it would be ok because you don''t eat with your elbows? Its still on your body, your underpants, and then in your hamper.

I''m guessing you don''t have kids yet ... or a pet. Believe me: Fecal matter is in YOUR hamper too. Maybe even someone ELSE''s.

 

[packrat]

The only time I''ve ever seen one was when I watched Crocodile Dundee waaay back in the day. I''d have to have a class or some sort of crib notes on how to use it. Maybe a big poster on the wall, like the Heimlich poster.

 

[LaurenThePartier]

I''m firmly in the babywipe camp, though I''m not totally opposed to bidets that don''t have the fancy water fountain feature.

I "used" one on our first night in Italy. In our first hotel in Rome, I had not done quite enough research and we ended up in a super small room with a super small bathroom. The bidet was situated almost entirely in front of the shower. Well, I''m a clutz, tripped getting out of the shower, used the bidet to steady myself, and ended up turning the sucker on. Cold water struck the middle of my torso that was partially covered with a towel. I vowed to never go near another bidet in a hotel again.

By the time we made it to Le Sirenuse, I was so in love with the bathroom in our suite that I almost had a "why not?" moment. Then the first night in Rome came rushing back and I decided to avoid it for the rest of the trip.

 

[princesss]

OMG. I''m dying over here. DYING.

 

[Lilac]

It's a good thing I read the last 2 pages in my own apartment. I don't think my professors would have appreciated my hysterical laughter.

I'm now picturing someone wiping with their elbows, then backing onto the bidet making beeping noises like a truck, and then spraying themselves all over with the water.

 

[poshpepper]

Date: 2/23/2010 6:53:46 PM
Author: somethingshiny

Date: 2/23/2010 6:20:26 PM
Author: charbie

Date: 2/23/2010 5:43:26 PM

Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 5:40:53 PM


Author: IndyLady


If you got fecal matter on your hands, would you just wipe them off with a paper towel and walk away? Probably not. So why are your other parts any different?

Well ... I don''t eat with my *** for starters. Also: don''t handle door knobs or do food prep with it either!

Omg deco....that comment just made my day.

hilarious!

And, FWIW, it seems a lot of people use baby wipes, so we''re still CLEAN! It''s not like we''re walking around with dingleberries while the bidet users are squeaky clean.

This whole exchange is just awesome... but the highlighted literally made me spit out my water with laughter... I think my co-workers are looking at me strange now...

And I am in the no Bidet camp, I will stay with my baby wipes TYVM!

 

[monarch64]

Date: 2/23/2010 7:04:22 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 6:07:38 PM

Author: IndyLady

If you got fecal matter on your elbows, are you saying it would be ok because you don''t eat with your elbows? Its still on your body, your underpants, and then in your hamper.

I''m guessing you don''t have kids yet ... or a pet. Believe me: Fecal matter is in YOUR hamper too. Maybe even someone ELSE''s.

LMAO!

It''s true...poo is everywhere!!!

 

[swingirl]

Just curious. For those worried about butt germs do any of you folks swim in a public pool or spa?? Because they way I see it there are butt germs everywhere. And they say candy dishes at restaurants where people grab a little something before they leave are a good source of e coli. Turns out a lot of people use the restroom after they eat and don't wash their hands. Now that's cause for ewww.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 2/23/2010 7:58:26 PM
Author: swingirl
Just curious. For those worried about butt germs do any of you folks swim in a public pool or spa?? Because they way I see it there are butt germs everywhere. And they say candy dishes at restaurants where people grab a little something before they leave are a good source of e coli. Turns out a lot of people use the restroom after they eat and don''t wash their hands. Now that''s cause for ewww.

No, no and NO! I don''t partake in public pools, spas or candy dishes with unwrapped candy.

(One more for good measure:

)

 

[jas]

Any thread that has the terms "butt germs" and "dingleberries" wins.

After reading some of these comments, I need a bidet. For my brain.

 

[sugarpie honeybun]

Date: 2/23/2010 8:21:20 PM
Author: thing2of2

No, no and NO! I don''t partake in public pools, spas or candy dishes with unwrapped candy.

(One more for good measure:

)

GROSS! My company has a candy bowl filled with unwrapped candy sitting outside of the company restroom. It makes my skin crawl! Almost as bad as a bidet!

 

[kittybean]

This thread has me laughing so hard that tears are running down my face. My co-worker just came in and asked me what was wrong. (To save myself the embarassment of talking to him about butt-washing, I just said it was an inside joke.)

I''m not totally grossed out by the bidet thing, but I have no idea how I''d use one without making a giant mess of myself, my clothing, and my bathroom in the process. I''m also curious how you''re supposed to dry off--TP just wouldn''t cut it for me, I think, and I don''t really want to have a big ol'' stack of butt-towels by the bidet (necessary since re-using butt-towels would be much, much worse).

 

[TravelingGal]

I''ve been in bed with a fever for the last few hours and look what I missed...

And if anyone is going the butt towel route, they would have to be brown.

 

[Arkteia]

Date: 2/23/2010 7:58:26 PM
Author: swingirl
Just curious. For those worried about butt germs do any of you folks swim in a public pool or spa?? Because they way I see it there are butt germs everywhere. And they say candy dishes at restaurants where people grab a little something before they leave are a good source of e coli. Turns out a lot of people use the restroom after they eat and don''t wash their hands. Now that''s cause for ewww.

You know, I stopped going to public pools, spas or saunas. Restaurants are difficult - I just try not to let my imagination go astray.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Date: 2/23/2010 7:34:22 PM
Author: monarch64

Date: 2/23/2010 7:04:22 PM

Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 6:07:38 PM


Author: IndyLady


If you got fecal matter on your elbows, are you saying it would be ok because you don''t eat with your elbows? Its still on your body, your underpants, and then in your hamper.

I''m guessing you don''t have kids yet ... or a pet. Believe me: Fecal matter is in YOUR hamper too. Maybe even someone ELSE''s.

LMAO!


It''s true...poo is everywhere!!!

Tell me about it!

I''m giggling in the airport reading this

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 2/23/2010 9:21:23 PM
Author: TravelingGal
I''ve been in bed with a fever for the last few hours and look what I missed...

And if anyone is going the butt towel route, they would have to be brown.

HA!!!!! Best response ever!!!! Love ya TGal.


Sorry you are sick, hoping you feel better soon!!!!

 

[charbie]

next time there is a "favorite threads" thread...this takes the cake for me.

 

[AprilBaby]

I am so confused...I don''t exactly get the idea what you do with the darn thing? You sit on the cold rim facing in or out? And it squirts what you already wiped? So you have to move from the toilet to the bidet? It sounds time consuming and you would get your pants all wet? Or do you take your pants off first?

I''m not joking here, I really don''t get it....

 

[Vancity]

I''m all about knowledge:

http://www.wikihow.com/Use-a-Bidet

I particularly enjoyed the youtube demo at the end. Music by Yanni

 

[princesss]

Date: 2/23/2010 9:40:11 PM
Author: AprilBaby
I am so confused...I don''t exactly get the idea what you do with the darn thing? You sit on the cold rim facing in or out? And it squirts what you already wiped? So you have to move from the toilet to the bidet? It sounds time consuming and you would get your pants all wet? Or do you take your pants off first?

I''m not joking here, I really don''t get it....

I think they''re just a really good case for a good dress. And kilts.

OMG. I just found a reason for all guys to wear kilts. I love kilts. BIDETS FOR ALL! KILTS ALL AROUND!


(But seriously, I think you face outward, and have to do the pants-around-the-ankle shuffle. To face inward you''d have to take the pants off, or be an Olympic-level contortionist.)

 

[somethingshiny]

Perhaps the brown butt towels would qualify for a diaper cleaning type service. You know, send in X dirty butt towels and get X clean butt towels in return. Of course, you wouldn''t be getting YOUR OWN butt towels back. But, remember, bidets are so CLEAN so you shouldn''t even worry about using someone else''s butt towels!

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 2/23/2010 10:02:17 PM
Author: princesss
I think you face outward, and have to do the pants-around-the-ankle shuffle. To face inward you''d have to take the pants off, or be an Olympic-level contortionist

And what, pray tell, do you suppose is getting all up & in those ground-dragging pants? Which you then pull up and back onto your person. And rub all over your car''s seat/couch/lap of a loved one. That''s right: STRANGE FECAL MATTER! Or, at the very least, splash back + tracked in dirt + man drippings. Get thee to a hamper, stat!

 

[princesss]

So here''s the deal. We''ve got a great business opportunity here. Elle and sunnyd (I think) will provide the heated toilets and bidets (just heat the seats, please, not the water. Nobody needs to scald their hoo-ha). I''ll embroider the (brown) butt towels. SomethingShiny will send them to the cleaners, and return with clean butt towels. We could set this up in every major $$$ hotel in the US. We''ll just tell them it''s the latest bathroom fad in Europe. It sells that weird hair remover on TV, it''s gotta work!

Who''s in?

 

[princesss]

Date: 2/23/2010 10:13:53 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 10:02:17 PM

Author: princesss

I think you face outward, and have to do the pants-around-the-ankle shuffle. To face inward you''d have to take the pants off, or be an Olympic-level contortionist

And what, pray tell, do you suppose is getting all up & in those ground-dragging pants? Which you then pull up and back onto your person. And rub all over your car''s seat/couch/lap of a loved one. That''s right: STRANGE FECAL MATTER! Or, at the very least, splash back + tracked in dirt + man drippings. Get thee to a hamper, stat!

I don''t know about you, but I always carry a spare pair of pants and laundry hamper in my purse. I don''t associate with anybody that doesn''t.

 

[Kaleigh]

TGAL...

This thread will go down in PS history. It''s right up there with some of the best threads ever.....

 

[somethingshiny]

I''m in but only if I don''t have to touch the dirty or clean butt towels and if my delivery truck can say "Bidets and Butt Towels--Helping YOU Stay Dingleberry free since 2010"

 

[charbie]

Date: 2/23/2010 10:13:53 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 10:02:17 PM

Author: princesss

I think you face outward, and have to do the pants-around-the-ankle shuffle. To face inward you''d have to take the pants off, or be an Olympic-level contortionist

And what, pray tell, do you suppose is getting all up & in those ground-dragging pants? Which you then pull up and back onto your person. And rub all over your car''s seat/couch/lap of a loved one. That''s right: STRANGE FECAL MATTER! Or, at the very least, splash back + tracked in dirt + man drippings. Get thee to a hamper, stat!

yup. i hope you dont keep your toothbrush anywhere near a toilet. do you know how much stuff is on a toothbrush just by hanging out in the open air of a bathroom!?

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 2/23/2010 10:14:55 PM
Author: princesss

Date: 2/23/2010 10:13:53 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 2/23/2010 10:02:17 PM
Author: princesss
I think you face outward, and have to do the pants-around-the-ankle shuffle. To face inward you''d have to take the pants off, or be an Olympic-level contortionist

And what, pray tell, do you suppose is getting all up & in those ground-dragging pants? Which you then pull up and back onto your person. And rub all over your car''s seat/couch/lap of a loved one. That''s right: STRANGE FECAL MATTER! Or, at the very least, splash back + tracked in dirt + man drippings. Get thee to a hamper, stat!

I don''t know about you, but I always carry a spare pair of pants and laundry hamper in my purse. I don''t associate with anybody that doesn''t.

ME TOO! They fit so snugly with my portable crouching goofy man spotter & an industrial sized vat of Purell. A gal has gotta be CLEAN for goddsake.

 

[princesss]

Date: 2/23/2010 10:17:51 PM
Author: somethingshiny
I''m in but only if I don''t have to touch the dirty or clean butt towels and if my delivery truck can say ''Bidets and Butt Towels--Helping YOU Stay Dingleberry free since 2010''

I like the second half, but I think we need a catchier name.