Are you Pretty?

[ladypirate]

Date: 5/18/2009 10:40:47 AM
Author: elledizzy5
Man. I must be surrounded by women with low self-esteem in my life. We regularly discuss how often we cry before going out because we just don''t feel attractive. Sometimes I won''t even leave the house because of it.

I admire you ladies who feel confident in yourselves despite whatever tiny flaws you might have. I hope to some day be that confident.

I dunno, Elle--those death knights thought we were pretty hot.

 

[cakeny]

I was def a late bloomer. I went from thinking I was pretty unattractive to thinking I am pretty hot on most days. I don''t ever think of myself as "pretty" though. Hot yes, pretty, no.

 

[alli_esq]

Date: 5/17/2009 7:47:55 PM
Author: thing2of2
I thought this thread would be more fun but instead I'm just shocked that so many of my fellow PSers don't think they're pretty! Also, I don't believe you all-I don't think I've ever seen an unattractive PSer!

P.S. I think I'm pretty!

I think you're pretty too, thing! (you think I could forget those photos with you in that TDF amsale gown? I DON'T THINK SO!)

No, I'm not pretty. Got a big old honker. I wish I could replace it because my eyes and mouth (after 4 years of braces) are not bad...but yeah. The honker does it for me.

I don't think I'd ever have plastic surgery, but even if I would, FH always tells me that he wouldn't think I was beautiful anymore (haha, I think he just says that so that he's not the only one with a big nose in the relationship

)

And again--not to be a complimentfest here, but just to point out a couple who are delusional:
Tacori and Haven--you ladies are gorgeous. Like, no joke. You're both very very striking, IMO.

 

[ChinaCat]

Ok, I''ll bite. I find this thread very interesting, not as much for the topic as for the responses. Almost everyone on here that has said they don''t find themselves pretty that I have seen pictures of I would strongly disagree! PS''ers are a gorgeous bunch.

To answer the question: I actually do think I''m pretty. Why is that so hard to write? But it''s interesting because I have very high standards of real beauty, and I know that I am not beautiful. I also don''t think I''m classically pretty, in the symmetrical way- for example, I don''t have a face that would photograph well. But it''s what makes me different looking that makes me confident of the way I look. And I think confidence goes such a long way into people responding to you as "pretty". Sometimes I think I believe I am a lot prettier than I actually am. I blame my parents.

For example, I had a friend in high school that was gorgeous- looked like Claudia Schiffer or Rebecca Romijn (sp). Clearly she was far more beautiful than I was, yet I would get more attention from guys. All confidence. Absolutely nothing to do with actual looks. Now of course she has both, so it''s not a lot of fun to walk into a room with her.

Also though, I have been around the movie industry for a fair amount of my adult life and I see what hair and make-up can do. Most of the girls that we find beautiful are averagely pretty girls like the rest of us that have a lot of help. You would be amazed at what it can do.

I have noticed among friends that it seems whether or not you thought of yourself as pretty, or whether others identified you as "pretty" at a young age (I''m thinking 13-14, the junior high years) seems to set in stone your own impression. For example, I have a friend that by any standards is quite pretty, even beautiful. She is an actress and has been on a soap opera in the past (not known for casting unattractive people, right?) But in her teen years she was more smart and plain and wasn''t considered "pretty" (all of this is according to her of course) so she doesn''t see herself as pretty. Even though clearly her job has to validate that.

I love whoever said that everyone is pretty to someone. So true, and so beautiful.

 

[AmberGretchen]

Date: 5/17/2009 12:52:19 AM
Author: Gypsy
I used to be. Not anymore though.

totally beg to differ, having seen you person (very) recently

 

[ChinaCat]

Date: 5/18/2009 6:46:36 PM
Author: AmberGretchen

Date: 5/17/2009 12:52:19 AM
Author: Gypsy
I used to be. Not anymore though.

totally beg to differ, having seen you person (very) recently

Haven''t seen you in person, but in pictures you are stunning. All smoldering eyes and stuff.

 

[Mara]

beauty is def in the eye of the beholder... i notice that people tend to highly appreciate and give more 'beautiful' weight to assets that they covet in others.

the funny thing is that so many people that are socially lauded as beautiful (aka actresses) look incredibly diff without makeup. did anyone see that DH from last week where eva longoria had to go without makeup. i thought they deliberately made her look sick and sallow without makeup when in reality, i am sure she looks lovely without it. i wear hardly any makeup because i don't need it...i was (thanks mom!) genetically blessed with good skin, so when i was watching i thought, great here is an opp to show that women don't NEED to have a ton of makeup on to be beautiful. but not so much.

 

[LaurenThePartier]

Wow, I just spent an hour looking through the PS faces thread, and it''s so terribly incongruent to so many of the posts in here. Our posters are on average, better looking than you''ll find on most forums. I''d say our "pretty" population is really, really high.

 

[tigian]

I read through this whole thread and I still don''t know how to answer. I look in the mirror and think "could be better, could be worse." I get many compliments from friends, family, and acquaintances about my looks. I wonder if it has more to do with how I carry myself because although I accept the compliments, I don''t feel like it matches up to what I actually see. I felt pretty on my wedding day.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 5/18/2009 5:03:53 PM
Author: ladypirate

Date: 5/18/2009 10:40:47 AM

Author: elledizzy5

Man. I must be surrounded by women with low self-esteem in my life. We regularly discuss how often we cry before going out because we just don''t feel attractive. Sometimes I won''t even leave the house because of it.

I admire you ladies who feel confident in yourselves despite whatever tiny flaws you might have. I hope to some day be that confident.

I dunno, Elle--those death knights thought we were pretty hot.

World of Warcraft?

Everyone online thinks I''m smokin'', until they see my picture! I don''t think I''m hideous by any means - I''m cute, I suppose - but my personality is apparently ten times better than my looks. And that''s how I like it

 

[allycat0303]

Oh....now here''s a topic that REALLY reveals how we view ourselves.

On my VERY best days I think I can be considered *cute*. However, much of how I feel about myself is in direct relation to my younger sister, who syas she''s hot, knows she''s hot, and every guy she''s ever met has agreed. Meanwhile, guys have actually forgotten meeting me. TWICE. Their mouths drop open when they find out we are related. Obviously, this does not build my ego.

BUT. I also think, and I sincerely believe this: Beauty is WAY overrated. Really. I think women that are too wrapped up in their looks fail to measure up in many other ways. My earliest memories were of my mother saying, "Beauty means nothing. The only thing that matters is how intelligent you are." I think this is one of the greatest lessons my mom every gave me. Consequently, I am much more defined by my ambition and my intelligence then my looks. I think this is a good thing, because beauty is fleeting. AND not to mention the fact that there are gorgeous girls on every street corner.

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

Date: 5/17/2009 1:30:22 AM
Author: Circe
Am I pretty? Nope, not in the slightest.


I''m tremendously attractive (and very modest, to boot), but I''m a hawk-faced, deep-chested, curvy little woman in a time of remarkable inarticulateness and narrow-sightedness when it comes to beauty. In a more well-spoken age, I would have been called a handsome woman, but these days, that carries an intimation of androgyny that me and my 32D''s just can''t convincingly carry off.


''Pretty'' carries some very specific images of fine-boned delicacy, frilliness, and femininity to me, but there are myriad other forms of beauty out there - I''m all about trying to name and acknowledge as many as possible. Awesome question, Butterfly!

Love. This.

I haven''t read through all the posts yet, but I''m surprised at how many PSers don''t think of themselves as pretty (because I''d bet that i think you are!). We are all our own worst critics, no?

Like most, I have my days. The worst is when you *think* you''re having a ''pretty'' day, and then a photo is taken of you... and then you see what you REALLY look like

Yeah, generally though, I feel ''OK'' with myself

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 5/18/2009 7:28:46 PM
Author: MonkeyPie

Date: 5/18/2009 5:03:53 PM

Author: ladypirate

Date: 5/18/2009 10:40:47 AM


Author: elledizzy5


Man. I must be surrounded by women with low self-esteem in my life. We regularly discuss how often we cry before going out because we just don''t feel attractive. Sometimes I won''t even leave the house because of it.


I admire you ladies who feel confident in yourselves despite whatever tiny flaws you might have. I hope to some day be that confident.

I dunno, Elle--those death knights thought we were pretty hot.

World of Warcraft?

Everyone online thinks I''m smokin'', until they see my picture! I don''t think I''m hideous by any means - I''m cute, I suppose - but my personality is apparently ten times better than my looks. And that''s how I like it

LOL, LP!

That''s why I play WoW. Everyone is attractive in MMORPGS!

Besides, my character got to pick out all of her own features, so she''s pretty, plus she runs everywhere so she''s got a smokin body.

I envy my blood elf.

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

Post #2: Wowza- so many ''pretty'' feelings seem to be tied to weight. :sigh: Say it isn''t so!!

There''s a vast difference between a pretty and an athletic build. I''ve seen heavyset people of both sexes and thought they were pretty an/or handsome. "Plus size" models, for example, are extraordinarily pretty! Then again, plus size models are pretty avg. sized, so that''s not making the best point?

I think it''s more face/confidence/how one carries herself/himself/dresses himself/herself. Oh. And personality plays a major role! But if we''re going on outward appearances alone, I would say that for me, personally, weight really isn''t a factor. It may be if you''re asking me about how attracted I am to someone''s BODY, as we all prefer different body shapes. But not general prettiness.

 

[D&T]

Date: 5/18/2009 7:49:54 PM
Author: SanDiegoLady

Date: 5/18/2009 2:47:19 PM
Author: Aloros

Date: 5/17/2009 8:05:42 PM
Author: SanDiegoLady
Meh. Average. Not one way or another. I have had days or events where I have felt truly beautiful or glamorous.. with or without make up..

My husband thinks I''m beautiful.. I really think if you''re feeling it inside it shows outside.

SDL, get OUT! You are beautiful. You practically glow in your photographs.

I feel pretty at this stage in my life. I grew up a very very very awkward teenager (big glasses, braces, bad haircut...the works) and even had a classmate tell me I was ugly. I held on to that for a very long time. The first time a guy asked me out, I thought it was a prank!

I think I grew out of it though.

I get told that I am pretty a lot by strangers, and I have learned to accept the compliment gracefully. Most days I feel pretty. Some days I just roll out of bed, throw on the first clothes I see, and just want to go through the day unnoticed. It really helps to have a handsome man (my fiance, in this case) telling you how beautiful he thinks you look every day.

Aw, thanks sweetie.. that''s really kind of you..

I''m pretty simple/average, promise.

&

As far as the giving birth to a girl -vs- boy.. I''d never heard of such a wive''s tale.. my girl came first then three boys. I think I''m pretty good for wear, given I have four adult children.

Tacori, you are beautiful in every way.

SDL- I''m glad I can put a face to a screen name- Your a BEAUTIFUL!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

alli & SDL you are both very kind. I *promise* I was not fishing.

SDL, I think they "steal your beauty" while preggo ONLY. In my limited experience (with my own and my friends'' pregnancies) women who carry girls seem to gain more weight, have oily skin & hair, sometimes their nose grows (I am NOT kidding) when carrying a girl. All this is temporary though. Didn''t mean to suggest all moms of girls are now suddenly ugly! I actually had someone tell me "you look to good to be carrying a girl" at my baby shower. Little did she know.

 

[Haven]

Kimberly and iwanna--You ladies are so kind, thank you. I'm really about as average as you can get, but it's so nice to hear that someone thinks otherwise!

I thought about this a bit today, and I decided that it's sad that more women don't think they're pretty, *especially* because there are so many beauties here on PS. I'm usually taken aback when I open a thread with pictures and see how beautiful our members are.

I find that people look most beautiful when they're absorbed in a moment--of thought, of interaction with another person, of looking at something they appreciate--which are things we can't see ourselves doing. I think my DH looks most handsome when he's laughing while playing with our dog, but he'll never see himself in that moment, so his perception of his own appearance is so narrow, and it doesn't even include him in his most handsome moments. Does that make any sense?

 

[iluvcarats]

Nah. I blend in with the crowd.
But my kids are GORGEOUS!

 

[Haven]

Okay, I have another question:

For those of you with significant others, does your SO tell you that you''re pretty/gorgeous/beautiful/hot? If so, which one, and how often? And, does it make you *feel* pretty?

My DH rarely gives me compliments, so he''ll only comment on my appearance if I do something extraordinarily different like, you know, put on a wedding dress. That was probably the only time since our first few months of dating that he told me I look beautiful. It made me feel beautiful on our wedding day, though.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 5/18/2009 7:39:34 PM
Author: elledizzy5

Date: 5/18/2009 7:28:46 PM

Author: MonkeyPie

Date: 5/18/2009 5:03:53 PM

Author: ladypirate

Date: 5/18/2009 10:40:47 AM

Author: elledizzy5

Man. I must be surrounded by women with low self-esteem in my life. We regularly discuss how often we cry before going out because we just don''t feel attractive. Sometimes I won''t even leave the house because of it.

I admire you ladies who feel confident in yourselves despite whatever tiny flaws you might have. I hope to some day be that confident.

I dunno, Elle--those death knights thought we were pretty hot.

World of Warcraft?

Everyone online thinks I''m smokin'', until they see my picture! I don''t think I''m hideous by any means - I''m cute, I suppose - but my personality is apparently ten times better than my looks. And that''s how I like it

LOL, LP!

That''s why I play WoW. Everyone is attractive in MMORPGS!

Besides, my character got to pick out all of her own features, so she''s pretty, plus she runs everywhere so she''s got a smokin body.

I envy my blood elf.

I must admit, my blood elf is significantly better looking than me, with those pouty lips, big booty and teeny waist. Not to mention the "dainty" eyebrows! Soooo jealous.

(Psst...what realm are you in? My husband and I play in Scarlet Crusade.)

 

[princesss]

Date: 5/18/2009 9:01:56 PM
Author: Haven
Kimberly and iwanna--You ladies are so kind, thank you. I''m really about as average as you can get, but it''s so nice to hear that someone thinks otherwise!

I thought about this a bit today, and I decided that it''s sad that more women don''t think they''re pretty, *especially* because there are so many beauties here on PS. I''m usually taken aback when I open a thread with pictures and see how beautiful our members are.


I find that people look most beautiful when they''re absorbed in a moment--of thought, of interaction with another person, of looking at something they appreciate--which are things we can''t see ourselves doing. I think my DH looks most handsome when he''s laughing while playing with our dog, but he''ll never see himself in that moment, so his perception of his own appearance is so narrow, and it doesn''t even include him in his most handsome moments. Does that make any sense?

Yes! BF is so gorgeous when he''s watching an Ultimate game, or playing with the dog that it''s unbelievable. He''s self conscious when he''s dressed up to go out or something, but when he just relaxes and focuses on doing something he loves he''s jaw-droppingly gorgeous.

I also generally like pictures where I''m really occupied doing something. I like the way I look, and I think it''s because when I''m throwing myself into something Im not stopping to think about whether or not I look awful or if my smile sucks or whatever. I''m just having fun. (It''s why I think in general the goofier I''m being in a picture, the cuter it turns out.)

 

[princesss]

Date: 5/18/2009 9:19:39 PM
Author: Haven
Okay, I have another question:


For those of you with significant others, does your SO tell you that you''re pretty/gorgeous/beautiful/hot? If so, which one, and how often? And, does it make you *feel* pretty?


My DH rarely gives me compliments, so he''ll only comment on my appearance if I do something extraordinarily different like, you know, put on a wedding dress. That was probably the only time since our first few months of dating that he told me I look beautiful. It made me feel beautiful on our wedding day, though.

He tells me I''m gorgeous/beautiful/hot/sexy at least every other day, but usually every day. It rarely makes me feel hot/gorgeous/whatever, but it does make me feel loved and appreciated and happy, which boosts how I feel about myself in general.

 

[mimzy]

Date: 5/18/2009 9:19:39 PM
Author: Haven
Okay, I have another question:


For those of you with significant others, does your SO tell you that you're pretty/gorgeous/beautiful/hot? If so, which one, and how often? And, does it make you *feel* pretty?


My DH rarely gives me compliments, so he'll only comment on my appearance if I do something extraordinarily different like, you know, put on a wedding dress. That was probably the only time since our first few months of dating that he told me I look beautiful. It made me feel beautiful on our wedding day, though.

i have no idea if this is the superior philosophical stance on it, but my DH says nice things (all of the above) to me about the way i look all the time (at least a few times a day)and it absolutely affects how i feel about myself. not in a 'okay, whew, maybe i am okay looking' type of way, but more in a 'yay HE thinks i'm pretty' sort of way, and that's usually enough for me to feel good about my(physical)self for that moment in time (despite the constants of being overweight and having crappy skin and hair). even though his compliments have much more to do with his extremely vocal nature (love languages anyone?) than what i actually look like, i believe him to be sincere and it makes my heart flutter that someone as

could say things like that to me with a straight face

for the original question, i consider myself unoffensive looking. but just reading this thread makes me feel very vain.

 

[mia1181]

Date: 5/18/2009 10:40:47 AM
Author: elledizzy5
Man. I must be surrounded by women with low self-esteem in my life. We regularly discuss how often we cry before going out because we just don''t feel attractive. Sometimes I won''t even leave the house because of it.

I admire you ladies who feel confident in yourselves despite whatever tiny flaws you might have. I hope to some day be that confident.

Wow, I thought I was the only one! DH hates it and is so confused by it, but I often get really emotional/upset when I am getting ready to go somewhere and I hate how I look or my hair or even my clothes. I really feel good about myself most of the time, but somehow I get really stressed when I want to look good.

I also feel 500x uglier when I am in the presence of other girls who are attractive. I don''t know why. The last time we went to Newport Beach I about had a panic attack in the car looking at all of the blonde, busty fashionistas walking around. And guess where we are moving... Newport Beach! I guess I will have to figure out how to deal!

 

[mia1181]

oops

 

[mia1181]

Date: 5/18/2009 6:48:05 PM
Author: ChinaCat

Date: 5/18/2009 6:46:36 PM
Author: AmberGretchen

Date: 5/17/2009 12:52:19 AM
Author: Gypsy
I used to be. Not anymore though.

totally beg to differ, having seen you person (very) recently

Haven''t seen you in person, but in pictures you are stunning. All smoldering eyes and stuff.

She''s gorgeous IRL!

 

[mia1181]

Date: 5/18/2009 10:10:15 PM
Author: mimzy

Date: 5/18/2009 9:19:39 PM
Author: Haven
Okay, I have another question:


For those of you with significant others, does your SO tell you that you''re pretty/gorgeous/beautiful/hot? If so, which one, and how often? And, does it make you *feel* pretty?


My DH rarely gives me compliments, so he''ll only comment on my appearance if I do something extraordinarily different like, you know, put on a wedding dress. That was probably the only time since our first few months of dating that he told me I look beautiful. It made me feel beautiful on our wedding day, though.

i have no idea if this is the superior philosophical stance on it, but my DH says nice things (all of the above) to me about the way i look all the time (at least a few times a day)and it absolutely affects how i feel about myself. not in a ''okay, whew, maybe i am okay looking'' type of way, but more in a ''yay HE thinks i''m pretty'' sort of way, and that''s usually enough for me to feel good about my(physical)self for that moment in time (despite the constants of being overweight and having crappy skin and hair). even though his compliments have much more to do with his extremely vocal nature (love languages anyone?) than what i actually look like, i believe him to be sincere and it makes my heart flutter that someone as

could say things like that to me with a straight face

for the original question, i consider myself unoffensive looking. but just reading this thread makes me feel very vain.

I agree. I don''t think I am very pretty at all, BUT when DH says it, I believe him and it makes me feel good. I think it matters most that he thinks I am pretty, not random strangers. I choose to believe that he really thinks I am the most beautiful woman in the world.

 

[sbde]

haven: like yours my dh rarely gives me compliments. he does so only if i''ve done something out of the ordinary or really put an effort into dressing up.

 

[AmberGretchen]

Date: 5/18/2009 10:17:24 PM
Author: mia1181

Date: 5/18/2009 6:48:05 PM

Author: ChinaCat

Date: 5/18/2009 6:46:36 PM

Author: AmberGretchen

Date: 5/17/2009 12:52:19 AM

Author: Gypsy

I used to be. Not anymore though.

totally beg to differ, having seen you person (very) recently

Haven''t seen you in person, but in pictures you are stunning. All smoldering eyes and stuff.

She''s gorgeous IRL!

Totally agree - Ms. Gypsy has lovely, lovely features and beautiful hair

 

[Haven]

edited