DivaDiamond007
Brilliant_Rock
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What advice would you give your younger self, if you could?
- Thread starter Gypsy
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LaraOnline
Ideal_Rock
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Dear L:
Who you associate with is probably one of the most important influences on your character and your life. Drop the de*dsh*t hangers-on immediately.
Being clever is not a pass port in itself to success... you need to hang out with successful people, and adopt the habits of successful people
Most men, even the men who like you, are not particularly clever or successful. Stop chasing your tail. See step one.
Be prepared to really, really hold out for the REAL THING (a good motto for all aspects of life). Patience and soberness can help you achieve success.
For Crissakes, call that spunk you''ve got the ridiculous crush on! Go visit him, NOW!!! I dno''t care how embarrassed you are!! Because you''re right, you are destined to be married.
Who you associate with is probably one of the most important influences on your character and your life. Drop the de*dsh*t hangers-on immediately.
Being clever is not a pass port in itself to success... you need to hang out with successful people, and adopt the habits of successful people
Most men, even the men who like you, are not particularly clever or successful. Stop chasing your tail. See step one.
Be prepared to really, really hold out for the REAL THING (a good motto for all aspects of life). Patience and soberness can help you achieve success.
For Crissakes, call that spunk you''ve got the ridiculous crush on! Go visit him, NOW!!! I dno''t care how embarrassed you are!! Because you''re right, you are destined to be married.
LaraOnline
Ideal_Rock
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PS The education industry is an industry like any other, and must stand and fall on its merits. There is not necessarily an intrinsic gain from lots of study. Think carefully about what you are trying to achieve in continued study. There are significant opportunity costs associated with remaining in the scholarly world without business / work experience.
Amandine
Brilliant_Rock
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FrekeChild
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Dear Liz,
Don''t date that one guy. Or if you do, only let him take you out once. He did make you appreciate your fiance more. Or maybe you should just go hunt your FI down when you''re both 18 and tell him that in 9 years you''ll be getting married. Or maybe not. That might freak him out.
And that other guy? Do me a favor and don''t date him for almost 4 years. WORST. YEARS. EVER.
Don''t match your prom shoes (or any shoes for that matter) to your outfit exactly. It makes you look like a Stepford Wife.
Stop dyeing your hair. No seriously. Just stop. It takes 2 years to grow back in to a decent length. You''ll thank me later. I promise.
Don''t try to be friends with those girls. They will just screw you over. Or drive you nuts. Or both.
And finally, spend more time with your mom. Ask her to tell you her stories again. And again. And once more for good measure. Then give her a couple of hugs. Times a thousand.
--Old Liz
P.S. Don''t be afraid to love.
Don''t date that one guy. Or if you do, only let him take you out once. He did make you appreciate your fiance more. Or maybe you should just go hunt your FI down when you''re both 18 and tell him that in 9 years you''ll be getting married. Or maybe not. That might freak him out.
And that other guy? Do me a favor and don''t date him for almost 4 years. WORST. YEARS. EVER.
Don''t match your prom shoes (or any shoes for that matter) to your outfit exactly. It makes you look like a Stepford Wife.
Stop dyeing your hair. No seriously. Just stop. It takes 2 years to grow back in to a decent length. You''ll thank me later. I promise.
Don''t try to be friends with those girls. They will just screw you over. Or drive you nuts. Or both.
And finally, spend more time with your mom. Ask her to tell you her stories again. And again. And once more for good measure. Then give her a couple of hugs. Times a thousand.
--Old Liz
P.S. Don''t be afraid to love.
Rock_of_Love
Brilliant_Rock
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Octavia
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Gypsy
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Rock_of_Love
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Well, I didn''t...so I guess I should say instead...Date: 4/15/2009 12:38:12 AM
Author: Octavia
Eeeeek! No!! Don''t do it!!!
"You ARE beautiful! Don''t think you are not! Don''t let that jerk you fall in love with in the summer between your junior and senior year lead you along! He just wants his cake and eat it too! He isn''t worth it!
"Don''t cheat on that *one* test your senior year, just cuz you had "senioritis" (and you didn''t even really need to)! You could''ve been valedictorian if you hadn''t!!
"Apply to Stanford, even though your HS counselor said not to...you probably would''ve gotten in!!
"Go to Europe when you are young and in college.
"Don''t give *it* up so easy...wait 3 months AT LEAST!!
"When you were in college and experimenting with some of the early computers, you should''ve stuck with that and bought some Microsoft stock...as well as AOL at the time. The Internet is the future, realize that NOW."
Seriously...I could compose a novel!!! Oh, if I knew then what I know now....such is life.
kittybean
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Amen, Gypsy. (Does this thread require you to have quit the legal profession? ''Cause I''m not quitting until studying for the bar is a little more of a distant memory.)Date: 4/15/2009 12:46:36 AM
Author: Gypsy
We should start a ''recovering lawyers'' thread on PS. LMAO. Don''t DO IT!Date: 4/15/2009 12:38:12 AM
Author: Octavia
Eeeeek! No!! Don''t do it!!!
It actually amazes me how many lawyers with amazing taste and incredible non-law-related talents there are on PS. I have to keep reminding myself that the law is not just for people who are "boring and ugly and serious" (as Elle Woods'' dad described them).
Okay, back on topic: I would not only tell myself to think long and hard before going to law school--I would also advise myself to do some serious research into what it means to be a lawyer and what law school is really like. I would then also research what the heck else I might be able to do with the skills I have. I wouldn''t toss aside the idea of teaching or going to grad school for language and literature so quickly.
To answer Tgal''s question, I don''t think I would truly want to change everything on the list. The knee surgery and eyebrow-plucking are non-negotiables. Not doing the former held me back from a lot of my dreams, and not doing the latter leaves me more than a little embarrassed to show people pictures of the time where I thought "shaping" my brows with a razor would just be so much faster and easier (wrong again, little KB).
I have such mixed feelings about law school and the legal profession. On one hand, I wish I hadn''t gone, because it''s caused me endless headaches, messed with my self-esteem, worked me to exhaustion, and almost bored me to death. Practicing law is better, and I like what I''m doing right now (public interest), but I still feel like there is a career out there that is more suited to what I do best. However, if I had tried to find that career after college, I probably would have never met my wonderful fiance, who truly makes me believe that everything will be okay no matter what. I was meant to marry this guy, so I''m happy that going to law school and finding a great summer internship led to meeting my future husband.
As far as finishing college early, it led me to where I am now--a year younger than most of my friends from law school, and much younger than most of the people I work with. I don''t mind this, but why shouldn''t I have "taken the money and run" in college when I had the chance? I could have had a whole ''nother year paid for by my wonderful out-of-state institution where I had wonderful times, great sorority sisters, interesting classes I actually wanted to go to, almost year-round pool access and constant flip-flop weather. That last year could have been filled with getting a better grasp on Italian, learning French, enjoying the advanced dance classes I loved when I was young, learning yoga for credit, taking more Women''s Studies classes, and maybe even going abroad again.
As far as the icky, unsuitable, moocher-of-a-boyfriend I allowed to hang around me for 3 years, on and off, just because I "loved" him, I think I did learn a lot from him about what I don''t want in a man. Besides being also cute and fun (different fun though), my current man shares no qualities with him. And I love it. I feel like I should have cut short that long college relationship as soon as I figured out the cheating and lying in which he was participating with no apparent qualms. Those cute frat boys smiling at me across the pool? I should have given them the time of day and let them take me out to dinner. The boys in my major classes who would actually read Borges and Neruda and Avellaneda before class? I should have smiled back and gone out for that coffee-study date they were always offering. That would have been fun, and collecting a few more friends here and there would have been fabulous.
In sum, the things I''ve been though have been difficult sometimes, and easy at others, but I''m happy with the way my life is turning out at this point. Now I just keep truckin'' . . . hopin'' I make some good decisions here in the future . . .
zhuzhu
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whitby_2773
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dear kareyn,
work just a little harder. not stacks and stacks - just a little.
you were right to dump law school and change majors - but you should have done vet science; you freaking LOVE animals!
don''t bother dating and dont stress about being ''single for the rest of my life!'' you''ll meet Mr Perfect when you''re 22 and he will adore you. and you will worship the ground he walks on. always.
work harder to keep the body you have now; guys think you''re hot and the reason you dont know it is because you go to a girl''s school. your legs are not the ugly lumps you think they are now.
grow your hair. you''re a natural blonde - what are you looking for??
dont lie. EVER. it''s the biggest waste of time and you never did anything that bad anyway.
save your money. you have the opportunity to determine your financial destiny starting NOW. when your parents offer you the opportunity to buy their small riverfront 40 acre property for $10,000 - DON''T BE AN IDIOT. dinners with friends, the latest fashions and catching cabs instead of public transport is not worth losing the opportunity to be a land owner at 20. (that land is gonna subdivide one day and be worth a barrel.)
pray more. in doing so you''ll be talking to the one person who can really help you.
read your Bible more. it gives you much better advice than your friends.
do NOT leave home at 18 to study miles away so you can follow your boyfriend; it will lead to three of the worst years of your life.
there is no ''one right thing/person/destiny.'' pick something and go with it. start now. mistakes can be undone, fixed, worked around or flat out denied. but inaction is something you''ll regret for the rest of your life.
one day when you''re old you''ll look back at your 48 yr old self writing this and wish you''d taken the same advice you gave your 17 yr old self. try to realize THEN that life is not over just because you''re no longer 25. get up. move. live. don''t ever let yourself be paralyzed by fear. time is ticking....
work just a little harder. not stacks and stacks - just a little.
you were right to dump law school and change majors - but you should have done vet science; you freaking LOVE animals!
don''t bother dating and dont stress about being ''single for the rest of my life!'' you''ll meet Mr Perfect when you''re 22 and he will adore you. and you will worship the ground he walks on. always.
work harder to keep the body you have now; guys think you''re hot and the reason you dont know it is because you go to a girl''s school. your legs are not the ugly lumps you think they are now.
grow your hair. you''re a natural blonde - what are you looking for??
dont lie. EVER. it''s the biggest waste of time and you never did anything that bad anyway.
save your money. you have the opportunity to determine your financial destiny starting NOW. when your parents offer you the opportunity to buy their small riverfront 40 acre property for $10,000 - DON''T BE AN IDIOT. dinners with friends, the latest fashions and catching cabs instead of public transport is not worth losing the opportunity to be a land owner at 20. (that land is gonna subdivide one day and be worth a barrel.)
pray more. in doing so you''ll be talking to the one person who can really help you.
read your Bible more. it gives you much better advice than your friends.
do NOT leave home at 18 to study miles away so you can follow your boyfriend; it will lead to three of the worst years of your life.
there is no ''one right thing/person/destiny.'' pick something and go with it. start now. mistakes can be undone, fixed, worked around or flat out denied. but inaction is something you''ll regret for the rest of your life.
one day when you''re old you''ll look back at your 48 yr old self writing this and wish you''d taken the same advice you gave your 17 yr old self. try to realize THEN that life is not over just because you''re no longer 25. get up. move. live. don''t ever let yourself be paralyzed by fear. time is ticking....
CNOS128
Ideal_Rock
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Date: 4/15/2009 12:46:36 AM
Author: Gypsy
Date: 4/15/2009 12:38:12 AM
Author: Octavia
Eeeeek! No!! Don''t do it!!!
We should start a ''recovering lawyers'' thread on PS. LMAO. Don''t DO IT!
The worst part is that I''m not even a lawyer yet. I still have a year (and this semester''s finals) to go, and I already know I don''t want to be a lawyer.
And I made the law school decision when I wasn''t that young.
And I''m worried that perhaps the next year (and set of finals) will suck every last bit of creativity from my brain!
allycat0303
Ideal_Rock
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Do not waste 6 years of your life, working like a dog, and living in a state of constant anxiety over whether or not you''ll get into medical school. You will get in, and when you''re done you''ll see it wasn''t worth it.
Just once in your life, take a break, and go party down south like every other normal college student. Your grades will not plummet if you do, and you will never be 23 years old again. You will regret wasting most of your 20''s chasing an empty dream.
The people that you are convinced will outlive you, won''t.
Figure out why you feel the way you do. It''s not normal.
Just once in your life, take a break, and go party down south like every other normal college student. Your grades will not plummet if you do, and you will never be 23 years old again. You will regret wasting most of your 20''s chasing an empty dream.
The people that you are convinced will outlive you, won''t.
Figure out why you feel the way you do. It''s not normal.
steph72276
Ideal_Rock
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Dear younger Steph,
Do NOT keep the same boyfriend all throughout high school and some of college. Just be single and hang out with your friends more.
Be nicer to your parents in high school....hormones are not an excuse to be so moody!
Stop trying to diet all the time in high school. When you look back on those pictures, you will realize you were great just the way you were. Size zero doesn''t equal perfection.
Spend more time with your grandfathers, they will both be gone soon at such a young age.
Go straight from your bachelor''s to your masters....a year off will turn into getting married and having a child so you better do it now!
When you are pregnant, do NOT make it an excuse to eat anything you want. It will take you YEARS to get that weight off....just say no to Quarter Pounders with Cheese!
Start being responsible with money from the start. Your 30 year old self would thank you if you would have saved more instead of spending on silly stuff you thought you needed.
Do NOT keep the same boyfriend all throughout high school and some of college. Just be single and hang out with your friends more.
Be nicer to your parents in high school....hormones are not an excuse to be so moody!
Stop trying to diet all the time in high school. When you look back on those pictures, you will realize you were great just the way you were. Size zero doesn''t equal perfection.
Spend more time with your grandfathers, they will both be gone soon at such a young age.
Go straight from your bachelor''s to your masters....a year off will turn into getting married and having a child so you better do it now!
When you are pregnant, do NOT make it an excuse to eat anything you want. It will take you YEARS to get that weight off....just say no to Quarter Pounders with Cheese!
Start being responsible with money from the start. Your 30 year old self would thank you if you would have saved more instead of spending on silly stuff you thought you needed.
nytemist
Brilliant_Rock
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- 962
Great thread! Just as I sat thinking the other night about things I would have done differently.
Dear 17-18 year-old C,
After high school, go with the friends that took time off to hop around Europe, instead of staying home that summer and going immediately to college.
Go to Marist instead of Johnson&Wales.
Go with the friend that was going to drive down to Miami and see where she landed (she nows owns a nightclub)
Don''t get married.
Continue to be your usual crazy, fun-loving, try new things extrovert and don''t listen to the people who tell you all the time to ''grow up''.
Accept that date that your best friend wanted to set you up with.
Never stop swimming.
Dear 17-18 year-old C,
After high school, go with the friends that took time off to hop around Europe, instead of staying home that summer and going immediately to college.
Go to Marist instead of Johnson&Wales.
Go with the friend that was going to drive down to Miami and see where she landed (she nows owns a nightclub)
Don''t get married.
Continue to be your usual crazy, fun-loving, try new things extrovert and don''t listen to the people who tell you all the time to ''grow up''.
Accept that date that your best friend wanted to set you up with.
Never stop swimming.
LaraOnline
Ideal_Rock
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AdiS
Brilliant_Rock
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Honestly, the only thing I''d tell the 17-18 year old AdiS is what I keep repeating myself these days: this too shall pass. Don''t waste so much time and energy worrying about things you won''t even remember in a month and don''t be in such a hurry to grow up. I''m still working on the former.
TGal is right though.
I have spend two years of my life deluding myself this guy is the love of my life. He was not. He wasn''t even worth a second glance.
I was betrayed by my dearest and beloved friend who was like a sister to me. It took me years to restore my trust in humankind.
I wasted a year trying to get into law school and when I failed, i was crushed.
And I wouldn''t change a thing. Without my bitter experience of how bad the bad guys can be, I would never be able to fully appreciate my husband when we met. If my friend hadn''t stabbed me in the back, I wouldn''t be so careful who I associate with later and wouldn''t be able to see what a real friend is supposed to be like when I met my BFF, who became my wonderful maid of honour. And if I hadn''t failed at the law school, I wouldn''t start studying economics where I met my hubby!
So, I think everything happens for a reason and I''m not sorry for a single hardship, mistake or a heartbreak I have ever had.
TGal is right though.
I have spend two years of my life deluding myself this guy is the love of my life. He was not. He wasn''t even worth a second glance.
I was betrayed by my dearest and beloved friend who was like a sister to me. It took me years to restore my trust in humankind.
I wasted a year trying to get into law school and when I failed, i was crushed.
And I wouldn''t change a thing. Without my bitter experience of how bad the bad guys can be, I would never be able to fully appreciate my husband when we met. If my friend hadn''t stabbed me in the back, I wouldn''t be so careful who I associate with later and wouldn''t be able to see what a real friend is supposed to be like when I met my BFF, who became my wonderful maid of honour. And if I hadn''t failed at the law school, I wouldn''t start studying economics where I met my hubby!
So, I think everything happens for a reason and I''m not sorry for a single hardship, mistake or a heartbreak I have ever had.
geckodani
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Margot
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"Don''t get involved with T. Make your focus your studies in college. Save your money while you''re in school, and stick it in some mutual funds. Travel abroad. Don''t forget you''re an adult now and you can do what you want without your parents approval. But mostly, don''t get involved with T."
*sigh*
Then again, if I hadn''t done what I''d done then, I wouldn''t be where I am now. I do like the now.
*sigh*
Then again, if I hadn''t done what I''d done then, I wouldn''t be where I am now. I do like the now.
whitby_2773
Ideal_Rock
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this is just the most precious thread.
hudson_hawk - your message made me cry - i love the sound of the man in your life now and you sound as tho you''ve learnt some valuable, hard won lessons.
so much of this thread brought a lump to my throat and tears to my eyes - there''s something about looking backwards that''s always bitter-sweet. perhaps we should start a new thread of things we''ve promised ourselves we''ll never do again - significant changes we''ve made which have changed our lives for the better.
i''d like a condensed version of this thread with all the names and specifics removed to give to all teenage girls; you cant buy wisdom like this!
you''re all just so precious! (wipes tears from eyes...smiles...)
hudson_hawk - your message made me cry - i love the sound of the man in your life now and you sound as tho you''ve learnt some valuable, hard won lessons.
so much of this thread brought a lump to my throat and tears to my eyes - there''s something about looking backwards that''s always bitter-sweet. perhaps we should start a new thread of things we''ve promised ourselves we''ll never do again - significant changes we''ve made which have changed our lives for the better.
i''d like a condensed version of this thread with all the names and specifics removed to give to all teenage girls; you cant buy wisdom like this!
you''re all just so precious! (wipes tears from eyes...smiles...)
tlh
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HollyS
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Note to self at 18:
1) Be less concerned with what other people think.
2) Do what you want, the way you want.
3) Choose a career based on your passions, desires, heartfelt longings. ''Cause the going to a ''job'' everyday gets tiresome. No matter the pay scale or benefits.
4) Enjoy youth; a decade (or a few) goes by in a flash!
1) Be less concerned with what other people think.
2) Do what you want, the way you want.
3) Choose a career based on your passions, desires, heartfelt longings. ''Cause the going to a ''job'' everyday gets tiresome. No matter the pay scale or benefits.
4) Enjoy youth; a decade (or a few) goes by in a flash!
Bia
Ideal_Rock
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Dear High School Bia:
-Don't be ashamed of your taste in music! One day, you'll be the cool one, and your 'friends' will still be generic.
-Don't be so hard pressed to go to a private university. Save your folks some money so you can find other, more fun, ways to spend it. Like a house
-Smokin a little w**d won't make you a bad kid. Trust yourself. Trust me...
-Beware of NY boys, they'll reel you in right quick. P.S.! It turns out better than okay in the end
-When you turn 18, toss every credit card application you get, except one, and let your parents use it until you are responsible enough to start using it yourself.
-And, save money, of course.
-Don't be ashamed of your taste in music! One day, you'll be the cool one, and your 'friends' will still be generic.
-Don't be so hard pressed to go to a private university. Save your folks some money so you can find other, more fun, ways to spend it. Like a house
-Smokin a little w**d won't make you a bad kid. Trust yourself. Trust me...
-Beware of NY boys, they'll reel you in right quick. P.S.! It turns out better than okay in the end
-When you turn 18, toss every credit card application you get, except one, and let your parents use it until you are responsible enough to start using it yourself.
-And, save money, of course.
Kelli
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Steel
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Octavia
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Date: 4/15/2009 8:06:00 AM
Author: TheBigT
Date: 4/15/2009 12:46:36 AM
Author: Gypsy
Date: 4/15/2009 12:38:12 AM
Author: Octavia
Eeeeek! No!! Don''t do it!!!
We should start a ''recovering lawyers'' thread on PS. LMAO. Don''t DO IT!
The worst part is that I''m not even a lawyer yet. I still have a year (and this semester''s finals) to go, and I already know I don''t want to be a lawyer.
And I made the law school decision when I wasn''t that young.
And I''m worried that perhaps the next year (and set of finals) will suck every last bit of creativity from my brain!
TheBigT, I could have written your post word-for-word. We should definitely commiserate, along with all the other JD-isenchanteds.
Elmorton
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Gypsy, THANK YOU for this thread!! I had so much fun writing/reading...
....and I asked my students to do this as a free-writing activity at the beginning of class today. They loved it, too! I didn''t require they share if they didn''t want to, but we were laughing so hard at some of the "nuggets" of advice that they did share for their former selves.
....and I asked my students to do this as a free-writing activity at the beginning of class today. They loved it, too! I didn''t require they share if they didn''t want to, but we were laughing so hard at some of the "nuggets" of advice that they did share for their former selves.
Selkie
Ideal_Rock
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- Jan 11, 2006
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Relax more in high school, take more chances, and socialize with more people. Most of them turn out to be pretty cool as adults. Take a good look in the mirror, you''re a lot more attractive than you give yourself credit for. Don''t let any guy make you feel like you''re not good enough, self-confidence is sexy. Especially important, don''t let the same guy make you feel "not good enough" for over five years. Oh yeah, and WEAR MORE SUNSCREEN!
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