The February LIW small talk thread

[SailorsSweet<3]

Date: 2/6/2009 7:55:27 AM
Author: sammyj

Date: 2/5/2009 5:41:37 PM

Author: Dreamgirl

I asked FF if he was getting me flowers for Valentines Day and he said: ''Wouldn''t you rather have something more permanent instead of flowers?''

''YES!!!!'' I don''t know what he''s talking about or if he is even getting me anything or not but anyway...lol

Wow...that''s a loaded question!!! Does he know what he''s getting himself into?

So lately I''ve been a little LIW crazy and everytime I hear about an upcoming engagement I say to my BF, ''we''ve been together longer than X and Y.'' Like, we were wathing Entertainment Tonight and they mentioned Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen and an engagement in the near future. Then I was reading the synopsis for last night''s episode for Grey''s Anatomy and I compared us to Derek and Meredith. Sigh....I''m a nutso!

DG that is a loaded question? I know youre not expecting anything ''til 2011, but do you think theres anything behind that comment?!?!?

sammy I get that way too. AND there''s at least 5 posts a month about being together longer than x and y who''ve gotten engaged. I know we''ve all gotten real good at talking ourselves out of the LIWcrazy.. but I wonder what the psychological reasoning behind it is.. itd be interesting for someone to do some research and figure out why so many of us feel we''re paling in comparison when couples of a younger length of time get engaged.. I think I''m going to do some googling on Sunday.

 

[Dreamgirl]

WHO FLIPPING KNOWS!!!!!!!?????????!!!!!!!!!!!

I was like:

lol! I don't know what he meant by that. I couldn't help but get that little idea in my head

But I don't want to get my hopes up because I don't see that happening right now. Plus, for Valentines...we usually get each other a card and sometimes not always a gift. We usually eat out, I've gotten little treats like a Valentines ice cream cake with our names on it, or white chocolate covered strawberries. Sometimes we do get gifts though. Last year he gave me a Tiffany porcelain blue box. (I hadn't gotten him anything last year! lol) One other year he gave me a mini rose bush instead of roses. I mean, he has gotten me flowers MANY a times but not as much the past few years.....seriously, what if he doesn't get me anything? Then he shall pay for that DIRTY little comment

lolol!

 

[misskitty]

I don''t know a whole lot about psychology, but my guess is that the reason we get so flustered (when couples X and Y who have been dating half as long as we have get engaged) is that we have it ingrained in our minds that getting things accomplished earlier = better. Like, think about when we were in school - nobody wanted to be the last one to finish a test, right? Or at work, projects have deadlines, and if you get yours done before the crunch, you''re praised. Even though relationships are WAY personal, there''s still that programming in our brain that makes us think, "Well, I started first, I shouldn''t be finishing after them!"

 

[Dreamgirl]

EEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!

So I'm getting my haircut tomorrow. Just a trim up. But I still can't decide on if I want to cut some long sideswept bangs or not!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't know what to do.......

HELP! Should I do it or not? (I've done variations of bangs before and I usually always hate it. But then again, I usually always hate the front part of my hair anyway as it always falls in my face. Stupid fine hair........)

 

[misskitty]

I say go for it! I just got sideswept bangs cut, and I love them. My hair''s pretty fine, too, and my stylist gave me some styling wax to help keep them in place. Plus...they always grow out, and you can easily get them blended into layers.

 

[Dreamgirl]

How long/short are yours?

 

[misskitty]

Mine are definitely long enough that they need to be swept off to the side. When I pull them to the middle, the longest part comes to a little bit past my nose.

 

[sammyj]

I love my sideswept bangs too. When I pull them down they are between my nose and my upper lip. I posted a pic in your other thread.

misskitty...your analogy makes sense. When I read your post I pictured my BF and I walking leisurely hand-in-hand through the park and seeing other couples speed walk past us. We then look at each other and think "Wtf? Should we be walking that fast too?" Or something along those lines. It''s hard not to compare yourself to others even though you know in your head that it''s not a race. (frankly, I''m sick of hearing that phrase!!

)

 

[SailorsSweet<3]

I did some googling.. this blurp from an article on jealousy over your SO and interaction with the opposite sex had a reference that caught my eye.

"White and Mullen (1989) define romantic jealousy as the cognitions, emotions, and behaviors that follow a loss or threat to self-esteem and/or existence or quality of a romantic relationship."

I personally can relate to this. I dont feel a loss in a competitive nature time-wise but I definitely take a hit to my self-esteem which then leads me to ask "if my relationship were as good as I feel it is why did friends x and y get engaged before SO and I?" I think all of us question the quality of our relationship when we have engagement envy and thats what leads to our LIW behaviors and in some cases to drive the SO''s up the wall with our jealousy. Thinking back, had I gotten engaged when a few of our mutual friends had gotten engaged OF COURSE I''d have been happy, yet I wouldve felt the need to justify why we wanted to go ahead with it so soon. Even though I wasnt ready to be engaged I still felt jealous and now I can point out that it WAS because I felt their engagements would lead others to examine our relationship and as why we''ve been dating longer, yet werent engaged - even if that question was not asked aloud or to our faces.

 

[misskitty]

This week, 4 people I know got engaged. I''m totally happy for them, but I''m getting a mad case of "when''s my turn?" even though rational me knows that''s silly.

It definitely sounds like this

Author: SailorsSweet<3
which then leads me to ask ''if my relationship were as good as I feel it is why did friends x and y get engaged before SO and I?''

 

[SailorsSweet<3]

its hard.. I know logically, no one here believes the quality of their relationship is based on how ready you are to get married. So many factors go into a marriage preparation before engagement, during engagement, after the wedding!! I know in my case, some of the people SO and I know who've gotten engaged have their parents (for one a mother who seems to be living vicariously through her daughter's wedding) who are helping them with all preparation for the wedding. Good for them, but I dont have that nor would I want someone doing all the planning and booking for me and just dragging me along to show me what they picked out- even if it was my mother. The thing I keep telling myself is their parents wont be there to help them with their marriage or married life (I assume, but honestly who knows how far it will go). SO and I are preparing ourselves FOR engagement which is something I feel is very respectable and I respect everyone here for the same reason! I feel like so many couples dont do that, at all. My relationship will be ready for engagement and then ready for marriage and thats far more important to me than getting engaged yesterday to beat the crowd. we should all feel proud in knowing how much this board helps us help our relationships in a healthy way, prior to the ring

 

[misskitty]

Author: SailorsSweet<3
My relationship will be ready for engagement and then ready for marriage and thats far more important to me than getting engaged yesterday to beat the crowd. we should all feel proud in knowing how much this board helps us help our relationships in a healthy way, prior to the ring

So smart

 

[SailorsSweet<3]

I hate mondays

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 2/9/2009 9:25:34 AM
Author: SailorsSweet<3
I hate mondays

This one in particular, or just every Monday?

 

[Dreamgirl]

I CUT BANGS!!!!!! They ended up being very long sideswept bangs. Literally just above my chin. Which is fine for this time around because I didn''t want to go too short incase I hated them. Only problem, I have this shorter bob type style haircut that is just below my chin. So the bangs are hardly noticeable

On the other hand, I think I like ''em.

I''m proud of myself because I often fear change. And I made myself do it because its something I wanted to do. I just told myself: "It''s better to try it and hate them than to never have tried at all and wondered what it would be like."

 

[Bia]

Date: 2/9/2009 1:16:42 PM
Author: Dreamgirl
I CUT BANGS!!!!!! They ended up being very long sideswept bangs. Literally just above my chin. Which is fine for this time around because I didn''t want to go too short incase I hated them. Only problem, I have this shorter bob type style haircut that is just below my chin. So the bangs are hardly noticeable

On the other hand, I think I like ''em.

I''m proud of myself because I often fear change. And I made myself do it because its something I wanted to do. I just told myself: ''It''s better to try it and hate them than to never have tried at all and wondered what it would be like.''

Good for you for trying something new! I have bangs right now and I love them. When I don''t feel like wearing them, I clip them back with a bobby pin...Works for me!

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 2/9/2009 1:16:42 PM
Author: Dreamgirl
I CUT BANGS!!!!!! They ended up being very long sideswept bangs. Literally just above my chin. Which is fine for this time around because I didn''t want to go too short incase I hated them. Only problem, I have this shorter bob type style haircut that is just below my chin. So the bangs are hardly noticeable

On the other hand, I think I like ''em.

I''m proud of myself because I often fear change. And I made myself do it because its something I wanted to do. I just told myself: ''It''s better to try it and hate them than to never have tried at all and wondered what it would be like.''

Yay DG!

I bet they look great on you!

And I totally agree with better to have tried, than not. It''s only hair... it DOES grow back.

 

[Dreamgirl]

Yaaaaaaay! I''ve grown

Something I''m working on this year...lol

 

[sammyj]

Date: 2/9/2009 2:18:18 PM
Author: Dreamgirl
Yaaaaaaay! I've grown

Something I'm working on this year...lol

That's awesome DG! Your post reminded me of something....I used to work for lululemon when I was in school and they have a manifesto filled with random quotes to live by. For many of us, our favourite quote was "Do one thing a day that scares you."

P.S. I hate (non-holiday) Mondays too!

 

[misskitty]

Awesome! I''m glad you like the bangs

 

[Lauren8211]

On a totally random side note...

I've been trying to drink more water. So far today I've had... Ohh.... 50 oz. I think I'm supposed to get 64 all day, ideally?

Anywho... Oh my goodness does it make you pee a lot!

I've gone seriously... 5 times before 4 PM! I usually go 2 or 3 ALL day. Annoying!

ETA: I need to learn to cool it on the ellipses in my posts. Wonder where that habit came from?

 

[sammyj]

Date: 2/9/2009 3:52:03 PM
Author: elledizzy5
On a totally random side note...

I''ve been trying to drink more water. So far today I''ve had... Ohh.... 50 oz. I think I''m supposed to get 64 all day, ideally?

Anywho... Oh my goodness does it make you pee a lot!

I''ve gone seriously... 5 times before 4 PM! I usually go 2 or 3 ALL day. Annoying!

ETA: I need to learn to cool it on the ellipses in my posts. Wonder where that habit came from?

When I had a desk/office job, I''d drink a ridiculous amount of water and constantly have to go pee. I think I did it to break up the monotony of having to sit at my desk all day! Now, I''m constantly on the go and I find that I almost forget to drink water during the day. It''s bad!!!

I''m totally guilty for using a lot ellipses...(<--- haha, I just did that subconsciously) I hope that wasn''t a jab at me

! I can''t help it though. At least our posts aren''t big run-on sentences, right?

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 2/9/2009 4:08:26 PM
Author: sammyj

When I had a desk/office job, I''d drink a ridiculous amount of water and constantly have to go pee. I think I did it to break up the monotony of having to sit at my desk all day! Now, I''m constantly on the go and I find that I almost forget to drink water during the day. It''s bad!!!

I''m totally guilty for using a lot ellipses...(<--- haha, I just did that subconsciously) I hope that wasn''t a jab at me

! I can''t help it though. At least our posts aren''t big run-on sentences, right?

Sad to say, but I''ve actually gone pee when I didn''t have to just to break up the monotony of my desk job. I thought I was the only weirdo who did that! Ha!

Plus I spend a really long time washing my hands in the bathroom sometimes, so the day goes by faster.

I''m an ellipses freak! I think I use them when I''m actually pausing in real life. That''s both weird and totally unnecessary seeing as how we''re not talking and you don''t need to know when I pause.

I had to actively try NOT to use ellipses in that sentence. I think I have a problem!

 

[sammyj]

Date: 2/9/2009 4:12:19 PM
Author: elledizzy5

Date: 2/9/2009 4:08:26 PM
Author: sammyj

When I had a desk/office job, I''d drink a ridiculous amount of water and constantly have to go pee. I think I did it to break up the monotony of having to sit at my desk all day! Now, I''m constantly on the go and I find that I almost forget to drink water during the day. It''s bad!!!

I''m totally guilty for using a lot ellipses...(<--- haha, I just did that subconsciously) I hope that wasn''t a jab at me

! I can''t help it though. At least our posts aren''t big run-on sentences, right?

Sad to say, but I''ve actually gone pee when I didn''t have to just to break up the monotony of my desk job. I thought I was the only weirdo who did that! Ha!

Plus I spend a really long time washing my hands in the bathroom sometimes, so the day goes by faster.

I''m an ellipses freak! I think I use them when I''m actually pausing in real life. That''s both weird and totally unnecessary seeing as how we''re not talking and you don''t need to know when I pause.

I had to actively try NOT to use ellipses in that sentence. I think I have a problem!

Oh my goodness...I am laughing my butt off. Thank goodness I''m at home and not in public or else people might think I''m crazy! I used to also bring my toothbrush to work and brush my teeth several times a day to waste time. No, you are NOT alone!!!

I use ellipses when I''m not sure if I should use a comma or a semi-colon and I don''t want to use a period. So I guess that means that I''m pausing too. My text messages are even worse for ellipses and sometimes I have to remove them so I can fit everything into one text! Ahhh!!!!

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 2/9/2009 4:20:28 PM
Author: sammyj

Oh my goodness...I am laughing my butt off. Thank goodness I''m at home and not in public or else people might think I''m crazy! I used to also bring my toothbrush to work and brush my teeth several times a day to waste time. No, you are NOT alone!!!

I use ellipses when I''m not sure if I should use a comma or a semi-colon and I don''t want to use a period. So I guess that means that I''m pausing too. My text messages are even worse for ellipses and sometimes I have to remove them so I can fit everything into one text! Ahhh!!!!

Bwahaha! I am totally bringing my toothbrush with me next time! Maybe some floss, some mouthwash.... hell I''ll start doing my make up here in the morning!

I think you''re right. Ellipses are my "go-to" punctuation. I could just not be lazy and actually figure out what is correct. Or stick to my stand by... good ol'' ellipses!

Off to pee...

 

[SailorsSweet<3]

I hate mostly every Monday (Non-holiday is right! ha

) I work Saturdays so my weekends consist of Sundays. I had a particularly bad day today; though, I'm going to try and be extra productive tonight to make up for it but Im just in a bummy- sit on my couch with a blanket- kind of mood.

Coincidentally.. I'm drinking some poland spring sparkling water. The girls I work with are always talking about trying to drink more but we never get far... maybe one big poland spring bottle from 930 to 530? We even tried powder drink mixes to add into it but I'm not a big fan of them, they're very sweet. I figured out that I drink the sparkling water faster because its more like soda with the carbonation. Poland Spring is my favorite because their flavoring isnt too sweet at all. Its only 8oz per bottle, though.

 

[audball]

Hey ladies! I''m having some personal conflicts I wanted to share/get advice on, but it was kinda long (well very long) after I typed it out so decided to create a new thread. Please check it out and offer any advice you may have. It''s Non-LIW related, but has been on my mind a lot lately.

I''d especially appreciate sammyj''s perspective, as I believe somewhere I read that she''s an OT?

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/non-liw-advice-needed-i-feel-so-lost-warning-very-long.107007/

Thanks ladies!

 

[jcarlylew]

Date: 2/9/2009 6:13:38 PM
Author: SailorsSweet<3
I hate mostly every Monday (Non-holiday is right! ha

) I work Saturdays so my weekends consist of Sundays. I had a particularly bad day today; though, I''m going to try and be extra productive tonight to make up for it but Im just in a bummy- sit on my couch with a blanket- kind of mood.

Coincidentally.. I''m drinking some poland spring sparkling water. The girls I work with are always talking about trying to drink more but we never get far... maybe one big poland spring bottle from 930 to 530? We even tried powder drink mixes to add into it but I''m not a big fan of them, they''re very sweet. I figured out that I drink the sparkling water faster because its more like soda with the carbonation. Poland Spring is my favorite because their flavoring isnt too sweet at all. Its only 8oz per bottle, though.

my fav is san palligrino... YUM!

I finally caught a cold this year. i woke up at 10 and for 4 hours was coughing throughout my sleep. grrr.

 

[Bia]

Date: 2/9/2009 3:52:03 PM
Author: elledizzy5
On a totally random side note...

I''ve been trying to drink more water. So far today I''ve had... Ohh.... 50 oz. I think I''m supposed to get 64 all day, ideally?

Anywho... Oh my goodness does it make you pee a lot!

I''ve gone seriously... 5 times before 4 PM! I usually go 2 or 3 ALL day. Annoying!

ETA: I need to learn to cool it on the ellipses in my posts. Wonder where that habit came from?

Ha! me too...
I always use elipses, it''s sort of annoying because I notice after the fact.

BTW: I''ve been trying to drink more water too and the peeing is getting on my nerves. 5-6 times a day? Come on! At least we know our kidneys are in tip-top shape!

 

[Dreamgirl]

Sunday was so perfect, but yesterday we found out S will have his pay cut by 10% because the business isn''t doing good.......

GOD I just so badly wished he could get another job already.