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Sounds Like Operation Upgrade is About to Commence...

josieKat

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snip
So I changed my approach. Whenever my girlfriend came to me to vent, I started just using slightly modified versions of the classic therapist "I see. So how does that make you feel?" line. And, by golly, it worked!
snip

Btw, this isn't just something boys/men need to learn - women are sometimes fixer types too! Namely my wife (she owns a handyman business), who has had to restrain herself from leaping to solve anything I mention being an issue. Don't get me wrong, I love that her impulse is to fix things (it certainly comes in handy especially with a wonky house) and to make me happy, but she has definitely had to learn to basically take the same approach as TS. I've also learned to give a heads up about whether I'm venting and just need commiseration or want suggestions. I laughed out loud at the scale of great to fine though!

sledge, I'm sorry the open side view is possibly causing an issue in your H. Most likely, as I'm sure you know, a break from the conversation and bringing it up again in a relaxed moment with the explicit goal of trying to make sure she is 100% happy asap (within your joint goals wrt wedding expenses), whatever that means to her, will be appreciated.
 

HappyNewLife

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since you're outside of the return window, you have time to decide if it's something that truly needs to be changed and then you also have time to find the perfect replacement stone.

I had a .79ct H as my first diamond, and the tint always bothered me. I went up to a 1.0ct F after that. Then a 1.7ct G. And now a 2.937ct I - the I tint doesn't bother me at all, in fact, I don't even see it. I think I've either gotten less color sensitive over time, or the ACA just hides color really well.
 

peacechick

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I agree about taking a break and waiting for a relaxed moment. When she caught you by surprise, you could have come across to her as a bit intense and taking it personally (and who wouldn’t after investing so much time in creating the perfect ring) and she may have withdrawn from the discussion as a result. Face to face would be much better than a phone call for sure.

I think this is a great opportunity to work on your relationship since marriage will be full of moments like these! I’ll share mine. After many years of marriage, I made a remark to my DH that the sapphire he got me was darker than trade ideal and he was mildly offended and told me that was the best colour. It’s not but I think it’s adorable that he gets riled up about it. And I love my ring of course and don’t need an upgrade (just more rings).
 

ohsomethingshiny

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“Fine” is every woman’s F-word. :lol: Beware when she drops THAT F-bomb on ya.
 

bludiva

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Does the tint bother her? Maybe she says that it's pastel yellow just as a descriptive fact and doesn't want to change anything. It's as if she's discovering some aspect of a tangible object she hasn't noticed before.

+1

could be she notices it and that's all, she's just noticing it. it's fun to see the changes in various lighting conditions when you first get a stone. you'll have to figure out together if it is bothersome and if it warrants changing anything. i still think it looks amazeballs ;)2
 

msop04

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+1

could be she notices it and that's all, she's just noticing it. it's fun to see the changes in various lighting conditions when you first get a stone. you'll have to figure out together if it is bothersome and if it warrants changing anything. i still think it looks amazeballs ;)2

I agree that it looks freakin' awesome... but for her to blurt out that it's yellow (when it's supposed to be white) says it bothers her, IMO.
 

bludiva

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I agree that it looks freakin' awesome... but for her to blurt out that it's yellow (when it's supposed to be white) says it bothers her, IMO.

could be, but my point is a bunch of strangers on the internet can't diagnose, and it's hard for sledge to guess, they'll have to figure it out together.
 

2Neezers

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You wrote: More importantly, she did not appreciate me nit picking her ring and said “maybe I should ask her what she wants.”

What she said in the above quotes is sticking out to me. Even though the ring she received is gorgeous, did she originally want something else?
 

kindred

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I hate to say this, but I was thinking along the same line as @2Neezers. Do you think that she could be upset that you didn't just buy the maul store (can't remember which one it was) ring that wanted in the first place? Objectively, the ring that you had made for her is SO much nicer, but maybe she resents the fact that you had a custom ring made?

I REALLY hope that's not the case! But yeah, if she wants a whiter stone, I would talk to BG ASAP and see what they can do for you.
 

ohsomethingshiny

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I hate to say this, but I was thinking along the same line as @2Neezers. Do you think that she could be upset that you didn't just buy the maul store (can't remember which one it was) ring that wanted in the first place? Objectively, the ring that you had made for her is SO much nicer, but maybe she resents the fact that you had a custom ring made?

I REALLY hope that's not the case! But yeah, if she wants a whiter stone, I would talk to BG ASAP and see what they can do for you.

Woman’s mind: I picked out the ring I wanted and then man had to change it. So apparently my opinion/taste isn’t good enough and he had to change it to make it his version of what I wanted.

This is very presumptive of me of course. But I could see some women feeling slighted. Of course not all would and those would be thrilled at the effort. I think @sledge’s girl is in the second group. She did ask if anyone could order “her” ring, which would led me to believe she likes having a custom ring.
 

LLJsmom

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Only read page 1 and 2.

Get her an E to be safe. My mom is SUPER color sensitive. If you lined up a F, E, D she can usually correctly identify them. She thinks an F is yellow.
 

Tophat1

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When she originally tried on the Jared ring, do you remember the diamond color from the cert?

Here’s what I think: her mind is playing tricks on her. I’m guessing the cert said E or F or G. Now, I doubt Jared had aN AGS or GIA certed diamond and the grading was probably lenient. But maybe her mind is remembering an F and now she has an H and it is making her see yellow. The only time I see yellow on an H is if I hold it sideways against a white background. In fact, I went to HOF and looked at D-J diamonds and could only start to pick up tint on the I.

Doesn’t mean she’ll be happy with the H, but that ring was made for that stone and I’d hate to see you swap it out to accommodate a mind game
 

msop04

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When she originally tried on the Jared ring, do you remember the diamond color from the cert?

Here’s what I think: her mind is playing tricks on her. I’m guessing the cert said E or F or G. Now, I doubt Jared had aN AGS or GIA certed diamond and the grading was probably lenient. But maybe her mind is remembering an F and now she has an H and it is making her see yellow. The only time I see yellow on an H is if I hold it sideways against a white background. In fact, I went to HOF and looked at D-J diamonds and could only start to pick up tint on the I.

Doesn’t mean she’ll be happy with the H, but that ring was made for that stone and I’d hate to see you swap it out to accommodate a mind game

This is EXACTLY what I was thinking... in combination with her surroundings. The lighting in the mall jewelry stores is very deceiving as well. That's why going back to compare stones in person is so important at this point. I think that may help. It's certainly worth a try before you trade up for a colorless stone and she STILL sees yellow.
 

msop04

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Also, you need to make sure she knows that she's only comparing apples to apples if the others are GIA graded stones... anything else is up in the air and can be as many as 4-5 shades lower than is stated on the report.
 

sledge

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Hmmm....I'm not sure what's going on today but I missed a bunch of posts that is now filtering through randomly on my side. That said, I am going to attempt to quote and answer most of this stuff so we can hopefully all get on the same page.

I know you put so much thought and effort into this so I'm sure you were quite surprised! I really believe (and there have been multiple accounts here on PS) that AGS is ever so slightly softer on color so your AGS H might be closer to a GIA I and that's where people usually start to notice tint. I'm not starting a debate on this but just saying I tend to agree so I would advise if you DO go the upgrade route, that you wait for an F which might be more like a GIA G. Also agree with you on not going much lower in size - staying at or just above the 6mm mark if you want to stay at something comparable or of course a little larger wouldn't hurt either haha

Btw, I chucked to myself reading this....it's so true and I do it ALL the time :lol:

Thank you for the kind words @ac117. It was definitely a labor of love, but I am so glad to have taken the journey. Although there have been speed bumps, I like the fact it's a custom ring with a look not others have and when we get this all sorted out I am sure it will be worth it too.

I do think you are correct in the AGS color grading being softer than GIA's. I've studied up on it a bit myself and came to the same conclusion. Agree, no need for a debate. But I truly think with her color sensitivity and the exposed diamond sides it just makes more sense to stay F+ in color since I am certain I want to stay within super ideal status.

At this point, I am not considering going smaller. I'd like to match the size, but more white. However, I'd be willing to go a little larger if needed. I just want need to coordinate with DK about how much wiggle room I have without causing problems on the setting. During the design phase, I gave them exact dimensions and the entire ring was built around those dimensions so I have to proceed with caution.


I can see the tint in these pictures, so it is unlikely that it is environmental or skin tone. Now whether it bothers her to the point she wants an upgrade, only the two of you can decide. It is truly a lovely stone. =)2

Thank you for the compliments, much appreciated. :cool2:

Yeah I can see the tint too. But I'm detailed and picky. What surprises me is that SHE can do it. When we started this journey she literally told me to get her a CZ and she'd be happy. Now I'm learning she's a f*ckin' color connoisseur! :wall:


Does the tint bother her? Maybe she says that it's pastel yellow just as a descriptive fact and doesn't want to change anything. It's as if she's discovering some aspect of a tangible object she hasn't noticed before.

Conversations between a man and a woman quite often result in misunderstanding because the man will go off looking for a solution to a problem when the woman just wanted to talk about it.

I'll be honest, I don't know. When she blurted it out, it was "my stone is yellow" to which I'm sure my initial look wasn't good. Within a nano second, my brain went back into history where @icy_jade and I was debating color and she called H "yellow" also, which kind of torqued me.

Not because I own H but because even going up to K I wouldn't consider that "yellow". It's the term I have an issue with because I don't like yellow gold, brass or anything in that spectrum. Oddly enough I do like very bright yellow (what I call "canary yellow").

Just for the record....no "yellow" here. :lol: I see tints of white/cream is all.

diamond-color-side.jpg



This is yellow....and hideous IMO. I've peed that shade of yellow before when I didn't drink enough water. Thanks, but no thanks.

Good news is I think I finally found a stone big enough for all you with DSS. :lol:

graff-yellow-diamond-auction.si.jpg

Acceptable shade of canary yellow. Blower is optional but helps me like it more. :mrgreen2:

0d4889152910e3e92e718709d6252c81.jpg


Anyhow, my long drawn out point is that when she said "yellow" I may not have had the best look on my face as all this flashed in my head. So maybe she used the other descriptors to lessen the blow to my ego.


The melee is going to look whiter and brighter than the center due to the smaller flashes. Therefore, if you decided to upgrade the center stone for an F color, then it would still be fine. If she thought an H is "pastel yellow", there is no way I'd get a G. I think F is a ripoff bc it's the tail end of the colorless range, but you're still paying for colorless... however, it would be much less expensive than a D or E.

What color environment was she looking at this ring? Were the walls off white or was the lighting less than stellar?? I can understand seeing "tint" in an H if suuuuper sensitive, but pastel yellow??? Nope.

Yeah, my point too. In fairness to her she used pastel yellow as she knows I don't like pastel and said it was much, much more faint than that. She just didn't know how to properly describe it is the issue I believe.

And yes, the walls in the new place are tan and we were sitting in the breakfast nook that has some weird combo of normal lightbulbs and those twisty curly ones (CFL I think). I haven't had time to replace them with the Reveal light bulbs I like.

043168449526_09204921.jpg



Wait... didn't your lady choose this stone from the two you posted?? I may be confusing threads, but I thought you showed her the stone.

Nope, she never got involved in the diamond choosing process.

The choice came down to a WF 0.90ct G SI1 Expert Select and the BGD stone. I opted for the BGD because of the superior cut, meeting true super ideal & not just expert select, it was a super clean VS2, it was about $1k lower and it had medium fluor to help whiten back to a G.


Ahhhh... it was an AGS H! Yeah... hmmmm.... I think it's time to have the discussion of size vs color. Also, I would NOT have that setting remade. It was a PITA with a lot of blood, sweat, and tears for you! ...and it's exactly what she wanted. That said, I think you could set a somewhat smaller stone in it just fine. I'd ask DK to tell you the smallest diameter it could hold and still keep its aesthetic.

The problem if I go smaller is the twisty halo wraps will then have too large of a gap between the outside of the stone and the wraps. At this point, I would replace it with the same size or slightly bigger but nothing that any of you suffering from DSS would be happy hearing about. ;)2


I think I am going to tell DH about my DSS that way he can fix it! :twisted2:
Be sure to ugly cry.

LOL, and this is why I will never bring the future Mrs Sledge to meet any of you. :lol: :lol:


Boy ain't that the truth. Often times I regret bringing up a topic because it spirals into something massive when all I wanted to do was to share something. In this case, did she mention the color because she is unhappy about it or just as something she noticed? Maybe she was surprised she was this color sensitive and was simply commenting. And now will she be unhappy/frustrated because you're now talking/worrying about the wall colors at her work, her tanned skin, and nitpicking at her beautiful ring and making her feel worse about it?

Yup, I am relatively certain the fact I have analyzed it and tried to find a solution and reasoning behind it has made it worse. She doesn't want to make a fuss about it, and I want to understand it and fix it while there is time.


Wait... what?? I'm so confused by what she said here.

I'm having difficulty with this this statement, and it makes me sad for you, @sledge. We all know how you agonized over every single detail (no matter how "minor") in order to give your girl an amazing diamond and setting in a quality that she would've never received with the inspiration ring. I think I probably need to refrain from commenting on this part. <le sigh>

As you mentioned earlier, I think she needs to wear her ring and compare it with GIA XXX graded stones in the local shops to test her tolerance and preference for color.

Awwww thanks @msop04. She didn't beat me up, I promise. And she's not trying to be difficult. I want her to know that the most. Just if it's something she doesn't prefer, tell me so we can work around the time limitations and try to correct it.

If it becomes a massive undertaking, I will tell her she has to wait a bit until we source the right stone.

And I do think she needs to look at stones. That is what I suggested this morning before she got upset with me and asked why I didn't want to know what she wanted.


The setting isn't your problem. She wanted that setting, set high. If she's worried about the color from the side, then she prefers a higher color.

ETA: an H isn't a low color... she is just very sensitive.

All true statements. Still I knew there was tint in the sides of an H and I should have upgraded the color or redesigned the setting to better hide the sides if I stuck with H. I take full responsibility for that and if I design another one I will remember this lesson.


@sledge, what was the color of the stone in the inspiration ring from Kay/Jared/maul shop? Is it possible that she just has more time to "examine" the ring now that it's on her hot little hand?? Not that it changes how she views the color, but I'm just trying to make sense of it all...

The inspiro setting didn't have a stone pre-set. However, when looking the sales guy showed us a 1 carat G SI1 XXX which she didn't like because it bled over onto the pave halo twists. Then he got all proud as we were talking CA, PA, table, depth, ASET, etc. and pulled out a D IF about 1/2 carat and threw in there. She loved that, but not because of color or clarity. It "fit" the Jared setting properly which is what made her happy. I thought he was going to cry as he never saw a girl ask for a smaller diamond. :lol-2:

If she remembers that color, I'd be amazed. She spent like 10-15 minutes with it and that was MONTHS ago.


so i agree with the comments that you need to have a frank discussion but give her some time to think about it for a day or two. Start off by "i don't want to upset you by bringing this up. You should know, I LOVED creating your ring, i did it because i wanted it to be everything YOU wanted and i wanted it to be absolutely beautiful. I only want you to be happy with it! Please know that if you are unhappy with the stone and the tint will bug you, i would absolutely be happy changing the stone. i love you and i want you to be happy with it forever."

I hope your conversation with her goes well!

Thank you for the wise words. I have decided I'm going to let this sleep over the weekend. Maybe bring it up Sunday if the right opportunity arises. We shall see.


I feel you are right... you need to reinforce that it's totally okay, but she needs to tell you NOW so it can be fixed. Tell here this exactly (in bold red above). If she STILL won't give you a direct answer, then you can rest easy knowing that you've done everything you can to make her happy. However, I know I'd probably say "screw this" and just switch out the damn stone for an F and nip it in the bud to avoid future issues.

Disclaimer: I don't know anything about your fiancé other than what has been posted, but I am female (and admittedly a difficult one, at that), and I used to play this game too. It took a while for me to figure out that it doesn't get me what I want in the long run -- it even makes it worse, so now I just say what I want and what I mean.

I agree with the urgency and having a right to say I did everything, but I'm just not built that way. I want to do it right and make her dreams come true. I know she's not meaning for this to be a task. She is quite the opposite of a hassle.

If anything I'd do as you suggested -- just switch the stone to an F and move on. Sunk costs for the finance/accounting majors.


I want to add that you're handling this situation with the utmost sensitivity and care, @sledge. You sound like good marriage material to me!

(can you talk to Mr. msop04 for me, please?? mama needs an upgrade!! ;-) )

Thank you so much, I appreciate that! :cool2:

But trust me, I definitely have my moments and baggage. But I do try hard and I always mean well. I'm sure all this will work out fine. It's not a major deal (to me) outside of wanting it to be right so it's a non-issue again.

And sure. My consulting fees are Crown & Coke, preferably frozen if you have the recipe and icee machine to make them. :mrgreen2:


First, I love the setting you designed. The profile is magnificent. I love the way the diamond’s profile is exposed; to me one of the pleasures of diamonds is being able to see the exposed pavilion exactly as shown in your meticulously designed setting, so one can admire the color from the side.

If you are going to go for a whiter stone, take the following with a grain of salt.

I’m very color sensitive. As someone who was bothered by the tint of a G, I finally in the end told myself only AGS certified E (or GIA certified F) was the way to go. I have an AGS E now and it’s ~just~ white enough, although not as white as my GIA E that I lost. You might try out a couple Fs and Es side by side to see if you can find one “white enough”. You might try medium fluorescence, if your fiancé is okay with that. Honestly, I would select an SI1 ACA or CBI with the help/assessment of a trusted gemologist (I’m not sure how BGD handles inclusions but I’m sure it’s the same rigorous assessment) to get a larger and whiter stone. Both companies (BGD might too) have rigorous standards on inclusions. You will not see inclusions in a sub one carat superideal without difficulty. I urge people not to buy into the idea that (minute carefully assessed) flaws in a natural diamond are indicative of a lack of integrity or value. I love my rock, and the minute speck of inclusion is a natural part of my rock. “Senior level” eyesight doesn’t hurt either. :) A note on cut. Stick with superideal of any brand. It makes a huge difference and is worth the premium.

Awww, thank you for the awesome compliment on the setting!

In my head, at this point, I think an upgrade in color is necessary. No offense taken and I agree with you on all levels.

FYI, the current stone is a BGD Blue and has medium fluor. Since we will be sticking with a super ideal stone I am not overly concerned about fluor and she doesn't know the difference.

Also, I understand I need to let the VS2 clarity thing go. It's a mind clean thing for me, and I understand there are some great SI1's out there that will fit the bill and be beautiful. I'd just like to find a VS1 that accidentally got mislabeled and discount priced to an SI1 level. ;)2


I posted before I finished reading the thread and being seeing the pics of how open it is on the sides. It sounds like you have a good understanding of the issue. I’ve now had two BGD I’s and if you looked hard you could definitely see color from the side. But my settings have never been nearly as open as yours.

It just seems like such a hassle and financial burden to redo everything - especially when it’s possible she was just making an observation and doesn’t really care. I totally do this to my husband - he thinks I am complaining, but I’m really just making an observation. I hope this is the case for you!

Thank you, I hope so too. Fingers crossed. :pray:

since you're outside of the return window, you have time to decide if it's something that truly needs to be changed and then you also have time to find the perfect replacement stone.

I had a .79ct H as my first diamond, and the tint always bothered me. I went up to a 1.0ct F after that. Then a 1.7ct G. And now a 2.937ct I - the I tint doesn't bother me at all, in fact, I don't even see it. I think I've either gotten less color sensitive over time, or the ACA just hides color really well.

Very true. I guess I'm just hopeful that BGD may cut me a break given the situation. I'm certainly not expecting anything but I think it's worth a conversation to fully understand my options.

If none of the options make sense, the upgrade and changes will have to wait.


You wrote: More importantly, she did not appreciate me nit picking her ring and said “maybe I should ask her what she wants.”

What she said in the above quotes is sticking out to me. Even though the ring she received is gorgeous, did she originally want something else?

She found the inspiration piece at Jared's. I had it custom designed/built with DK. Some tweaks were made to refine it. One of those things being it had to be re-proportioned to fit the BGD stone. However, all said and done she sees ecstatic with it so I don't think that's the issue.

So while it wasn't EXACTLY what she found, it is very similar but with tweaks that make it better.


I hate to say this, but I was thinking along the same line as @2Neezers. Do you think that she could be upset that you didn't just buy the maul store (can't remember which one it was) ring that wanted in the first place? Objectively, the ring that you had made for her is SO much nicer, but maybe she resents the fact that you had a custom ring made?

I REALLY hope that's not the case! But yeah, if she wants a whiter stone, I would talk to BG ASAP and see what they can do for you.

Possibly. But at this point there isn't much I can do about it. If that is the case, she needs to tell me and we will work with DK to do something else. But I honestly don't think that's it because as I said she seems to love it. Even after telling me about the tint, she seems protective about it like she doesn't want me messing with it or taking it from her to get it fixed.


Woman’s mind: I picked out the ring I wanted and then man had to change it. So apparently my opinion/taste isn’t good enough and he had to change it to make it his version of what I wanted.

This is very presumptive of me of course. But I could see some women feeling slighted. Of course not all would and those would be thrilled at the effort. I think @sledge’s girl is in the second group. She did ask if anyone could order “her” ring, which would led me to believe she likes having a custom ring.

LOL, I hope she's in the second group. She does most the cooking so she will have opportunities galore to get revenge.


Only read page 1 and 2.

Get her an E to be safe. My mom is SUPER color sensitive. If you lined up a F, E, D she can usually correctly identify them. She thinks an F is yellow.

I'm leaning strongly this way just so I don't have to worry about it. Problem is I have to confirm if the melee will work with an E+ or not.


When she originally tried on the Jared ring, do you remember the diamond color from the cert?

Here’s what I think: her mind is playing tricks on her. I’m guessing the cert said E or F or G. Now, I doubt Jared had aN AGS or GIA certed diamond and the grading was probably lenient. But maybe her mind is remembering an F and now she has an H and it is making her see yellow. The only time I see yellow on an H is if I hold it sideways against a white background. In fact, I went to HOF and looked at D-J diamonds and could only start to pick up tint on the I.

Doesn’t mean she’ll be happy with the H, but that ring was made for that stone and I’d hate to see you swap it out to accommodate a mind game

The Jared ring didn't have a stone set. It was a setting only and they loose set some different sized stones in the setting to give her an idea. I'd be surprised if she even remembers the size, color or clarity marks of each stone. She just knows how it made her feel and if she liked the look.


This is EXACTLY what I was thinking... in combination with her surroundings. The lighting in the mall jewelry stores is very deceiving as well. That's why going back to compare stones in person is so important at this point. I think that may help. It's certainly worth a try before you trade up for a colorless stone and she STILL sees yellow.

Absolutely. She has to see it in person and confirm it's colorless. That's what I was telling her this AM. I don't care where it falls, but I need to know so we don't have to fix it twice.


Also, you need to make sure she knows that she's only comparing apples to apples if the others are GIA graded stones... anything else is up in the air and can be as many as 4-5 shades lower than is stated on the report.

All the stone previously presented to us were GIA XXX stones. I got the manager and their gemologist helping me because I kept asking too many technical questions for their other sales people to handle.

Obviously they tried to sell me, but at that point I had already decided on the BGD stone and wasn't going back. I was informing them about HCA tool, ASET, idealscope, etc. Pretty funny actually.
 
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Todd Gray

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Worked late and came home. As we are eating dinner, my girl drops a bomb on me -- her diamond is yellow!

At first I thought she was joking as she knows I'm pretty obsessive over her stone, cleaning it, etc. Nope, she wasn't joking. She describes it as pastel yellow but much, much more faint.

For those that are curious...

BGD Blue 0.867ct H VS2

https://www.briangavindiamonds.com/...0.867-h-vs2-round-diamond-ags-bl-104098623002

I'm not really sure when my inspection/return period kicked in as I bought the stone and it sat in BGD's safe for at least a month prior to shipping to DK for final mounting. DK then had the stone about a week. I finally had in my hands around 6/29 and if I am reading correctly, I only had 15 days to inspect & return so I think my time would have ran out around 7/14.

:cry2:
Really wish she had said something earlier, although in her defense she wasn't trying to be rude and she just assumed it was her as no one else ever said anything to her. Apparently she is more color sensitive than I originally thought.

Assuming I'm out of the return period, I am guessing my only other option is an upgrade. I started looking tonight but didn't find anything of similar size and budget ($4700+) that got me excited.

Any other thoughts? Also, now I'm on the fence about a G. Almost thinking F+ and maybe E+ to be safe. Most likely I will just get her involved so she can see the difference and tell me where it does and doesn't make a difference.

Hi Sledge,

If you’re more color sensitive to subtle differences in hue and saturation, then you might be able to see a bit of warmth in an H-color diamond, since that is in the spectrum of near-colorless.

I know that the Gavin’s want you to be happy with your diamond, shoot Lesley an email, but give her some time to respond because of the weekend.
 

LLJsmom

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With regard to putting a colorless stone in a halo, especially an MRB, I still notice the inherent difference in the way the eyes see melee and a much larger center stone. Especially with MRB melee, I think she will read the melee as very white and sparkly and the center stone won’t exhibit that same kind of “whiteness”. I put that in quotes because even though the center is an E, it exhibits whiteness differently from colorless full cut melee.
I have a Tiffany soleste double halo and the melee is nothing but WHITE-WHITE ALL THE TIME. No flashing or contrast or arrows. Just white. If you have concerns about her Being color sensitive, I wouldn’t do a halo. It would defeat the initial goal of getting a whiter stone.
 

sledge

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With regard to putting a colorless stone in a halo, especially an MRB, I still notice the inherent difference in the way the eyes see melee and a much larger center stone. Especially with MRB melee, I think she will read the melee as very white and sparkly and the center stone won’t exhibit that same kind of “whiteness”. I put that in quotes because even though the center is an E, it exhibits whiteness differently from colorless full cut melee.
I have a Tiffany soleste double halo and the melee is nothing but WHITE-WHITE ALL THE TIME. No flashing or contrast or arrows. Just white. If you have concerns about her Being color sensitive, I wouldn’t do a halo. It would defeat the initial goal of getting a whiter stone.

When I said halo earlier, I didn't mean physical halo. The way the split shaft takes and wraps up and around the diamond, it gives the appearance of a halo on the top view.

I need to pay attention to the whiteness aspect more. But just the other night I noticed her melee was flashing rainbows at me as was her center stone while watching TV with minimal lighting. I frequently see the melee sparkling and not just "white" per se.

Are we talking the same thing?

DKJPV_0629_WR-1.jpg

DKJPV_0629_WR-8.jpg
 

Crystal_Dreams

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Colour in a stone is much more visible from the side than from the top. I can certainly see it... I just prefer to look at the pretty sparkly side :) having said that, when I noticed the colour in my F, it was from face up.

The problem is, now that she has noticed it... it isn’t going to go away. Have that frank conversation with her and let her know that you just want her to have something she loves, and it is something that can be addressed... but as others have said, the sooner the better. BGD have amazing customer service- so give them a chance.
 

MissGotRocks

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Sledge, I admire your attitude about all of this. Unfortunately, because you are the one that has acquired so much diamond 'knowledge', the yellow comment may end up eating at you more than it does her. Sometimes we can't unhear what we've heard. I know you put so much time and thought into this ring and anything less than just right won't do. Believe me - I feel your pain!
 

LLJsmom

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When I said halo earlier, I didn't mean physical halo. The way the split shaft takes and wraps up and around the diamond, it gives the appearance of a halo on the top view.

I need to pay attention to the whiteness aspect more. But just the other night I noticed her melee was flashing rainbows at me as was her center stone while watching TV with minimal lighting. I frequently see the melee sparkling and not just "white" per se.

Are we talking the same thing?

DKJPV_0629_WR-1.jpg

DKJPV_0629_WR-8.jpg
Sorry I see what you mean. It’s a halo from the top down view. The center stone will go up in color. I assume that means you are keeping the setting since you put so much time and effort and money into it.
 

Dancing Fire

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My wife's ring is an H colored GIA stone, if she complains about it then I'll find myself a cheaper wife.
nod.gif
 

babs23r

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@sledge You saw the stone before it was set, right?
Did you see any yellow tint? I actually do see what she is talking about from the pictures, but it’s hard to get a good diamond photo.
I would take her to a store and have her pick out a color that she deems white. She’ll always be bothered by the tint...:wall:
 

diamondseeker2006

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Stones with fluoresence are sometimes overgraded for color (see article below), so with AGS grading, this stone easily could be GIA I color in light with zero UV.

https://www.pricescope.com/wiki/diamonds/diamond-flourescence

I certainly think you could go to G color and improve this problem. Just tell BG it HAS to be a true G, as in GIA G, and get the stone appraised before you have it set. Get as close to the exact same size as the stone you have now. It looks right in the setting and I would NOT sacrifice size. Only go up one color because you'll be in huge trouble if you ever want to upgrade again, since you'd have to increase two specs. I think a true G would be a big improvement, and you're already going to have to add money to get a G without fluorescence.
 
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