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Home My nanny did WHAT?!??!!

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I don''t have any kids but, her reaction when you walked in says it all, She knew he was not doing the right thing. If she wasn''t doing anything wrong, why didn''t she greet you as if she would have 30 minutes later.
 
It doesn''t matter how nice or apologetic the nanny is. This was a HORRIBLE judgment call on her part and one that I don''t think you can excuse. If you can''t trust your nanny to make decisions in the best interest of your child, then they''re not a good fit. She needs to be let go.
 
I don''t have kids (yet). I hate confrontation and try to avoid it at all costs. However, if something like this happened in the future with my child and babysitter I would fire the babysitter immediately. Is it really worth taking the risk that she''s going to do this again and next time something bad might happen? I would feel bad about her financial situation also... but your child is your priority and you need to do what''s best for him. Finding a nanny with better judgment is best for him.
 
Holy crap.
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Fire her. Immediately. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Do not ever leave your child in her care again. Unacceptable. You do NOT leave a baby, in a stroller, unattended, let alone outside in the front yard with the door closed.
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LIA, I don't even get this. Why the heck did she leave him in his stroller outside alone?
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What was her reason for it? Seems so incredibly bizarre to me.
 
if i were you she''d already have been fired...can you imagine what else she has done to harm your child?!?!??!

i believe small day cares are good for children because they get to learn social skills and there is more than 1 adult looking after your child. i am leery of letting 1 person, whom you don''t know well watch your child. anyone hired in a nanny position is going to put their best show on for the parents.....with that said if you do decide to keep her, i''d get a nanny cam or something else so you can watch her, but i wouldn''t go to that kind of anxiety or trouble....trust your motherly instinct
 
I agree with everyone else, she needs to be fired immediately. Also, I wouldn''t assume that this was the first time that she wasn''t watching your son - it''s just the first time that she got caught.

I think that an excellent day care center would give you more peace of mind than another nanny would right now. My 3 year old son goes to preschool two mornings a week and he loves it - plus, there are two teachers for every class of 10 kids, so there''s always a "checks and balances" system with two adults supervising the class at all times.
 
Yikes!

The only thing I can think of, is your nanny from Scandanavia? Leaving children outside in their strollers is really common there, even in bitter below zero winters, the babies are bundled up and no one bothers them. I first saw this in Iceland and could not believe it, but in Sweden, Norway, etc, very common. I would of course assume that the nanny has been trained in cultural expectations about the US; we do not leave babies outside of shops here if we want to keep them! But just a thought that it might be cultural? You seem to like the nanny so I was hoping to come up with anything that might explain such random behavior. Attached is a photo from Iceland on a busy shopping street. It works there, but again, before folks pounce on me, leaving bebes out is not normal or acceptable in the US! buggies

ETA: Sorry I can't get the darn thing to attach!
 

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I live by the premise, Screw me once, shame on you, screw me twice . . . Coby''s safety trumps wanting to help the nanny financially and your own convenience any day.
 
It''s not even a question to me. I''d have fired her on the spot!!!
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Not to pile on, but I just am freaked out for you! Like you said, what on earth goes on during the day if this happened 30mins before you usually show up? What if someone did snap your baby, what would you think then. In your situation, I would have gone ballistic on her!

This is why I am just so anti-nanny..I'm sorry to all the nannies out there. With no supervision and no blood relation to the family, how can a mother ever be sure what is going on. Even little things like is a baby being watched like a hawk by potentially dangerous items (stairs, by the string that hangs from the window, by the bookshelf that holds the TV)..nevermind being taken outside and left there...or taken shoe shopping--I mean this is what I would be thinking about all day!

Let us know how you're doing LIA, this is alot to juggle when you're working. At least you have most days at home..if you were full time this would be tough to pull off (finding new childcare,etc).
 
Date: 12/8/2009 9:30:54 AM
Author: Laila619
LIA, I don't even get this. Why the heck did she leave him in his stroller outside alone?
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What was her reason for it? Seems so incredibly bizarre to me.
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My thoughts exactly. Did she explain why? Not that it matters- she should be let go immediately. I'm so glad Coby's okay.
 
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There are so many things that could have gone wrong in this scenario, and I can''t think of ANY reason for her to be leaving your baby outside like that - alone and with no way for her to hear him. What if something HAD gone wrong?? She wouldn''t even know what had happened. If someone had snatched your Coby, she wouldn''t even have been able to tell anyone what they looked like, where they came from, or what directions they went. She may be a nice girl, but she apparently lacks all common sense.

We all make mistakes, but this is egregious.
 
I started to read this thread very dispassionately. By the end of reading all the comments, however, I was back to feeling the way I did when my daughter was an infant and a toddler. I wouldn't leave her alone with anyone but my parents. I loved her more than life. If I came home to find her alone and crying, something I never allowed even when I put her down to go to sleep at night, I think I might have killed the nanny. No firing would have been necessary. My heart is racing now as I think about it.

AGBF
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oh my gosh, I would have been freaked out. I don''t even let my big kids play outside alone and we live in what is considered a safe area too. Seriously, so many things could go wrong and not just kidnapping. what if Coby wiggled out and fell out of the stroller or somehow managed to get ahold of a small object and started choking. I mean, it''s just not excusable at all. the least she could have done is push the stroller into the garage where she could easily see if when he woke up. the whole thing is just mind boggling to me. Fire her...no doubt about it. Heck if my own mother did something like that she would never be allowed to be alone with my child until they were older and I surely wouldn''t continue to pay this gal. and IMO this is a really big deal!!
 
Date: 12/8/2009 11:57:40 AM
Author: mrssalvo
oh my gosh, I would have been freaked out. I don''t even let my big kids play outside alone and we live in what is considered a safe area too. Seriously, so many things could go wrong and not just kidnapping. what if Coby wiggled out and fell out of the stroller or somehow managed to get ahold of a small object and started choking. I mean, it''s just not excusable at all. the least she could have done is push the stroller into the garage where she could easily see if when he woke up. the whole thing is just mind boggling to me. Fire her...no doubt about it. Heck if my own mother did something like that she would never be allowed to be alone with my child until they were older and I surely wouldn''t continue to pay this gal. and IMO this is a really big deal!!
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This is a really good point! The fact is that kidnapping is fairly low probability, but this scenerio could very well happen!

Daycares an be really great if you find a good one. And I think there are more checks and balances in a dycare setting to keep rhe caregivers on the ball, and with more than one caregiver if one is having a bad day, another can balance them out and maybe carry more load. I feel safer leaving hunter in that sort of situation than I do leaving him with a single caregiver.
 
Out of curiosity, what is the temperature like where you live, LIA? Right now here it''s a balmy 20 degrees. I take it you live in a comfortable climate, AT LEAST?

I hope you report back telling us how the firing went! Unlike AGBF, I probably wouldn''t have killed the nanny
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, lol, but as a confrontational person, I would have said, "get the *&#^ out of my house!"

How did you go about hiring her, anyway? If she is from a service of some sort, she should be reported.
 
What is more important to you- your nanny''s feelings or your child''s safety? This shouldn''t even be a question. This person is putting your child''s life at risk and your #1 job as a parent is to keep your child safe. Fire the nanny. Don''t allow her to spend one more minute putting your child at risk. If you have to take unpaid leave from work while you make other arrangements, then do that. Nothing is more important than the safety of your child- not the nanny''s feelings, not your paycheque, not your job- nothing.
 
Date: 12/8/2009 12:23:01 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 12/8/2009 11:57:40 AM
Author: mrssalvo
oh my gosh, I would have been freaked out. I don''t even let my big kids play outside alone and we live in what is considered a safe area too. Seriously, so many things could go wrong and not just kidnapping. what if Coby wiggled out and fell out of the stroller or somehow managed to get ahold of a small object and started choking. I mean, it''s just not excusable at all. the least she could have done is push the stroller into the garage where she could easily see if when he woke up. the whole thing is just mind boggling to me. Fire her...no doubt about it. Heck if my own mother did something like that she would never be allowed to be alone with my child until they were older and I surely wouldn''t continue to pay this gal. and IMO this is a really big deal!!
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This is a really good point! The fact is that kidnapping is fairly low probability, but this scenerio could very well happen!

Daycares an be really great if you find a good one. And I think there are more checks and balances in a dycare setting to keep rhe caregivers on the ball, and with more than one caregiver if one is having a bad day, another can balance them out and maybe carry more load. I feel safer leaving hunter in that sort of situation than I do leaving him with a single caregiver.
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Agree! And how many times do we hear of some new recall and think "how on earth would that even happen" when it''s in response to some event that harmed a baby. I bet it happens during incidents like this (baby left alone unsupervised by careless caregiver ,etc).
 
Didn''t you come home from work a few days ago and find Coby "a bloody mess" from some sort of gum injury and the nanny hadn''t even noticed? Was this the same nanny?
 
Wow, for once I think PP is being overly nice!! lol

I would''ve walked straight up to that little b**** and smacked her. "Fired" would be implied.

I''m sorry this is weighing so heavily on your mind.
 
Date: 12/8/2009 12:41:25 PM
Author: swingirl
Didn't you come home from work a few days ago and find Coby 'a bloody mess' from some sort of gum injury and the nanny hadn't even noticed? Was this the same nanny?
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Yes, she did post that her son was bloody while in the nanny's care. . .

Here's a quote from her post dated 12/03/09, "snlee: i came home from work a couple weeks ago and coby was a bloody mess. he had somehow torn the top part of his gum away from his lip when the sitter was there. she didn't even know how he did it. but OMG...i can't believe how much it bled (and KEPT re-opening all day!)."

I'm sickened that two incidents have been posted. How many other accidents have happened? Did you even take your son to the emergency room or at least a walk-in clinic? If the injured gum kept reopening, he may have needed stitches.
 
Date: 12/8/2009 1:03:08 PM
Author: MC

Date: 12/8/2009 12:41:25 PM
Author: swingirl
Didn''t you come home from work a few days ago and find Coby ''a bloody mess'' from some sort of gum injury and the nanny hadn''t even noticed? Was this the same nanny?
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Yes, she did post that her son was bloody while in the nanny''s care. . .

Here''s a quote from her post dated 12/03/09, ''snlee: i came home from work a couple weeks ago and coby was a bloody mess. he had somehow torn the top part of his gum away from his lip when the sitter was there. she didn''t even know how he did it. but OMG...i can''t believe how much it bled (and KEPT re-opening all day!).''

I''m sickened that two incidents have been posted. How many other accidents have happened? Did you even take your son to the emergency room or at least a walk-in clinic? If it kept reopening, he may have needed stitches.
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I''m sure LIA is handling it now, prob why she''s not online. And a sitter might not be the nanny.

I think this just shows how our mama bear instincts get stirred even when it someone else''s baby. I am generally a confrontational person, but oh boy even moreso when it comes to my baby.
 
Okay, I have to say that I agree with all of you that the nanny was in the wrong and should be terminated. But I think that some of the comments are starting to sound a little accusatory toward LIA for no reason. MC, I am sure that as a loving mother LIA was able to assess Coby''s injury and make the best decision for his care. The "did you even" sounds a whole lot like "Are you so incompetant that..." and I think we should be giving LIA the benefit of the doubt in terms of raising her own son.

JMO.
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Date: 12/8/2009 1:03:08 PM
Author: MC

Date: 12/8/2009 12:41:25 PM
Author: swingirl
Didn''t you come home from work a few days ago and find Coby ''a bloody mess'' from some sort of gum injury and the nanny hadn''t even noticed? Was this the same nanny?
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Yes, she did post that her son was bloody while in the nanny''s care. . .

Here''s a quote from her post dated 12/03/09, ''snlee: i came home from work a couple weeks ago and coby was a bloody mess. he had somehow torn the top part of his gum away from his lip when the sitter was there. she didn''t even know how he did it. but OMG...i can''t believe how much it bled (and KEPT re-opening all day!).''

I''m sickened that two incidents have been posted. How many other accidents have happened? Did you even take your son to the emergency room or at least a walk-in clinic? If the injured gum kept reopening, he may have needed stitches.
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OK, now you should fire her AND SUE her!

I''m being a bit dramatic of course but suffice it to say you are not going to have peace of mind when you step out the door.

Taking care of kids is hard work and should be taken seriously. I wouldn''t want to be a nanny ever. You''re in a job when you can''t possibly do as good a job as the mother and are in charge of someone''s most precious possession. I expect that sometimes people goof up. I''ve goofed many times as a mother and don''t expect a nanny to be perfect. My nanny once came back from the park with my kid, who she had dressed in a long sleeved shirt and a hoodie, that was zipped up. The problem was that it was 90 degrees out (unseasonably warm for fall) Amelia was obviously hot and flushed, and I was pissed off. After I calmed down, I realized that in the park, 90% of it is in the shade and it''s alwasy breezy because of the trees. She probably wasn''t sitting there dying of heat in the park. But the walk home got her.

Either way, my nanny wasn''t on top of her game. Was it a fireable offense? I didn''t think so, but I have not let them go out to the park since (also partially due to all the flu that was going around).

Your nanny has goofed up at least twice now somehow, and unlike me, you are not home to keep a check on things. There would be no question in my mind to let that woman go.
 
Date: 12/8/2009 1:12:33 PM
Author: luckystar112
Okay, I have to say that I agree with all of you that the nanny was in the wrong and should be terminated. But I think that some of the comments are starting to sound a little accusatory toward LIA for no reason. MC, I am sure that as a loving mother LIA was able to assess Coby''s injury and make the best decision for his care. The ''did you even'' sounds a whole lot like ''Are you so incompetant that...'' and I think we should be giving LIA the benefit of the doubt in terms of raising her own son.

JMO.
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Ditto
 
Date: 12/8/2009 1:12:33 PM
Author: luckystar112
Okay, I have to say that I agree with all of you that the nanny was in the wrong and should be terminated. But I think that some of the comments are starting to sound a little accusatory toward LIA for no reason. MC, I am sure that as a loving mother LIA was able to assess Coby''s injury and make the best decision for his care. The ''did you even'' sounds a whole lot like ''Are you so incompetant that...'' and I think we should be giving LIA the benefit of the doubt in terms of raising her own son.


JMO.
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The other thing to remember is that LIA is a DOCTOR. I am sure she knows when stitches are needed and when they aren''t.
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Gosh. Frightening. Reminds me of nightmares I used to have when my DSons were babies. I''d dream I left them alone somewhere, in a car or at home when I went to the store...I would have totally freaked out if a nanny/sitter had actually left my son unattended and crying.

I hope you get this worked out soon...maybe a daycare setting would be best.
 
Not to beat a dead horse, but I agree with the others. I put my child''s safety and well-being above everthing. If my in-home daycare provider did that with my son she''d be fired instantly. The nanny''s financial problems are her own, and her lack of judgment is astounding.
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I am so glad that Coby is safe because heaven forbid anything terrible happen to him.
 
Date: 12/8/2009 1:31:05 PM
Author: neatfreak


The other thing to remember is that LIA is a DOCTOR. I am sure she knows when stitches are needed and when they aren't.
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I didn't know that she is a dr. Sorry if my post went overboard BUT when I see two posts about the same child being hurt while in the care of another, it's going to bring out more of my opinionated views than the causal posts that I generally respond to. If the sitter and nanny are two seperate individuals, then more time should be taken in researching references. If the person is the same, then she is NEGLIGENT (the sitter/nanny that is) *JMO*

As Janinegirly said, LIA is most likely handling the situation now. Hopefully all works out good and LIA finds a wonderful, caring new nanny.
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