"Just Barely" Pregnant PS''ers

[lliang_chi]

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Sugar, Hugs my friend! Sorry you're going through a rough 1st tri. I had pretty bad constipation too, felt totally bloated and not myself. It gets better. Maybe you can find some food that can help with your bowel movements? I did some prunes and stepped up on stuff like oatmeal which helped me go a little easier. It does get better in the 2nd tri, or at least it did for me.

Missy, 12Wks, come on over to the preggo thread! Hope the 24 hr urine test goes quickly. Not gonna complain about 65F weather, but ha ha funny how things don't go as planned.

~LC

 

[mayerling]

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Sugarpie, isn't it annoying when we take the medication and still throw up? I have to really really really try not to throw up.

Missy, the medication seems to be doing something in that I haven't actually thrown up in the time I've been taking it but it hasn't gotten rid of the queasiness.
How's the 24hr urine collection going?

PetitePoire, you've seriously tempted me to start telling people sooner than planned

AFM, I finally managed to get an appointment with the midwife. She's coming over to my house to see me tomorrow morning.

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

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Hi ladies Long time, no post. I am actually home right now instead of at work (Long story ) so I thought I'd catch up.

China: What are you still doing on this thread?! You need to move on up! Not that I'm trying to oust you- I certainly like having you around... it's just that you're definitely not 'barely' pregnant. I'd say you're for-sure-definitely-positively pregnant.

Missy: Read China's message. It applies to you, too! I can't believe how quickly time flew by... I feel like you were just announcing your pregnancy on the TTC board and now you're headed full-speed toward the second trimester. Awesome! When will you have results from the 24 hour urine test? After how many instances of elevated blood pressure did they decide you should do the test? My numbers were off the chart last time and we chalked it up to a fluke/nerves, but I wasn't feeling nervous... so your situation has piqued my interest!

Mayering: WOO HOO! Glad you'll see a midwife soon. What will she do at this visit? Here's to hoping she has some homeopathic anti-nausea suggestions. Have you tried sea bands? I've read that they work somewhat well (for some women, anyway). Feeling crappy/nauseous/pukey is simply the worst. I feel for you.

Sugar: Sorry things haven't been going swell and that you're feeling pretty awful right now. Fingers crossed that the symptoms begin to abate. What have you been trying in terms of remedies? Anything other than the Zofran? I really, really hope you're feeling a bit better.

Petite: So fun that you were able to share with your family! I am jealous! ...And go ahead and buy more tests. I did that a lot in the early, early days and feel like doing even now.

Steph & Choro: Hope you ladies are well and wonderful!

AFM: I am trucking along at 6w 4/5d. Once I hit the 6 week mark it was like :WHAM: major nausea. At first I thought it was in my head, almost psychosomatic. Then I started gagging each time I tried to brush my teeth. And each time I thought of sushi (Even typing it is hard!). And each time I thought of food, period. Eating breakfast this morning was painful and, surprise, surprise, it came "up" in the middle of teaching World History. I'm not willing to share the news, so I played along with everyone's concerns of a stomach bug and took half the day off. It can't happen again, though... or if it does... I just have to fess up to my principal and tell him that I'm not actually sick and can stay in the classroom without putting the kiddos or other faculty members at risk of getting ill.

Now I'm feeling decent, but I'm so fickle when it comes to food. The only thing I think I can stomach right now is pho or some other noodle/broth combo. And lukewarm gingerale. Visualizing or actually seeing any other food item results in that gross sour stomach/salivation that's a precursor to vomiting. I also do not eat meat or dairy (sometimes I eat eggs or fish), but my typical vegetarian fare isn't cutting it. If this gets worse I'm in trouble. I so, so, SO feel for you ladies who are battling this in an epic way.

 

[PetitiePoire]

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PPM- I'm sorry it's hitting you so hard! Early on I felt really nauseous (before I took the test), so I feel your pain. Sorry you had to take off work! Yikes, I sure hope it doesn't happen again. You're a trooper though. Feeling bad in class is terrible outside pregnancy. Take the rest of your day and relax. Do you note at any meat? I read online about cravings and ms earlier and I remember something about red meat or protein. I've kicked both up I. Recent weeks and rarely have nausea now. Before it was on and off and now I just eat less and more frequently. Hopefully that made sense.

Mayerling- telling people was pretty nerve wracking, especially without having a doctor's confirmation. Oh, also I was surprised how fast my parents told siblings,etc right after we told them. Ideally I would like to wait for friends and rest of family when we can be certain how far along I am and how it's doing in there!

 

[Pandora II]

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Mayerling - I had hyperemesis, and didn't stop throwing up till about 32 weeks. At week 7 I was throwing up 20+ times a day and just felt like death. My SIL was hospitalised 3 times last year with hyperemesis as well and the only thing that worked for her at all was promethazine.

My GP prescribed promethazine which totally stopped the actual vomiting, but not the general queasiness. I did go through a 6 week phase where the only thing I could eat was Granny Smith's apples. I couldn't even go to the supermarket, let alone open the fridge or cook.

Unfortunately nothing seems to get rid of the nasty 'I might be sick' feeling, you just have to ride it out. It does lessen after a while. From about 25 weeks onwards I had far less nausea, so I kept stopping the promethazine and then ending up throwing up in people's flowerbeds an hour after the next dose was due...

I did have it for a lot longer than most people - normally it eases off around 14/15 weeks, so I hope you are lucky! In the meantime keep telling yourself that it is a 'good' sign!

You can buy promethazine OTC here btw, just say it's for your husband who gets travel sick - don't tell them that it's for you and that you are PG. I've no idea why they freak out about it as it's one of the safest meds for m/s going... and let's just say that considering the rest of the meds I was on (very large doses of opiates for starters) the huge team of doctors I was seeing were not exactly thrilled to throw more into the mix!

I would suggest only taking the 10mg, not the 25mg. Didn't seem to change the effectiveness on the sickness, but it can make you feel really drowsy and I found with the 25mg I was permanently half asleep, which combined with the general 'hit by a tank' 1st trimester feeling is not too good.

10 minutes is way too soon for it to get into your system btw.

PSA: I am not - nor planning to be - pregnant, I merely clicked on the wrong thread by mistake...

 

[sugarpie honeybun]

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PSA: I am not - nor planning to be - pregnant, I merely clicked on the wrong thread by mistake...

Pandora - I always enjoy your disclaimers regarding possible pregnancy


Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement.

Mayerling, PPM and any other sick pregoos - we're in this together! Good, bad or ugly, we'll get through this awful trimester....

 

[Missy0483]

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I turned in my orange urine jug today haha. The nurse says "okay we'll call your # for the blood test" I told her I had it done Wednesday when I picked up the jug. I told her I had asked if it was okay if I waited to begin the urine collection on Sunday and she said no problem and took my blood. The nurse today said she's not sure why she went ahead and took my blood since it has to be taken within 24 hours of beginning the urine collection. Say what??? And this was at the hospital where I will deliver! She apologized for the error. Thankfully I'm not deathly afraid of needles anymore!! So instead of being 10 minutes late, I was an hour late to work. Ugh! But besides that it was a smooth process I'll get results from both tests at my appointment on Wednesday.

 

[mayerling]

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Pandora, I'm so glad you chimed in. It's good to know I can just get it over the counter as they only gave me 28 pills and I'm going to be away for over a month. The thought of having to chase them down again to prescribe more was really not enticing. I'm sorry to hear you were that sick for so long! I really hope it's not like that for me.

Missy, it's amazing how inept doctors offices can be sometimes. Mine seems to misplace my results half the time!

 

[Pandora II]

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Pandora, I'm so glad you chimed in. It's good to know I can just get it over the counter as they only gave me 28 pills and I'm going to be away for over a month. The thought of having to chase them down again to prescribe more was really not enticing. I'm sorry to hear you were that sick for so long! I really hope it's not like that for me.

Missy, it's amazing how inept doctors offices can be sometimes. Mine seems to misplace my results half the time!

You know you can change GP practices any time you want? My father was a GP so I tend to demand a certain level of 'service' and vote with my feet if I don't get it!

You will find a big difference between the USA and UK when it comes to maternity services. Unless you are high-risk or doing infertility treatments, you won't see an OB at all - probably not even during labour. I was high risk and only saw an OB twice - and frankly it was better seeing the midwives anyway! I did see the hospital midwives rather than have 'shared care' with my GP and the community midwife team. Btw, if you don't like the midwives you can also change midwife group - my SIL did that.

If you go to the GP and say you are pregnant they will just book you for your booking appointment at around 9-10 weeks with the midwives. They won't do betas or another test - the reason being that if you are going to miscarry there is nothing that they can do, so what is the point in wasting money on doing these kind of tests for no good reason. They also trust you to take an HPT yourself! Although, my GP made his wife do 5!

At the booking appointment they will do blood tests, some will weigh you to get a base-line. It's not normal to weigh you during pregnancy here. I put on over 75lbs and they weren't worried in the slightest - I measured right for dates and looked in proportion apparently.

They will also discuss family medical history. Geneticist appointments are only if there is a relevant issue.

There is no point taking your husband to any appointments other than the booking one (unless they misbehave like mine did and sit and read the Economist during the whole thing) and the scans. You can wait for HOURS sometimes if it's a hospital one and it's only 10 minutes - blood-pressure, urine, fundal height and that is it. The hospital normally let you hear the heartbeat, but I'm not sure how many GPs or midwives do that.

Regarding the NT scan, you should get the results immediately after the scan. If the numbers are bad you then have 3 options - do nothing, have CVS (can be done straight away, results back in a few days, 2% risk of miscarriage) or wait till 15/16 weeks for an amnio and then another 2 weeks for the results (only 1% chance of miscarriage). If you would terminate for chromosomal abnormalities, I would personally opt for CVS. The risks are higher, but the risk is over all CVS procedures... in London they are doing them on a much more regular basis and so the actual risk is far, far lower than the 2%.

With CVS you've got the results fast and you can have a surgical termination, with amnio, you are at least 17/18 weeks along and that means they have to induce labour which IMO is a lot more emotionally and physically stressful.

BTW, not all areas in the UK offer the NT scan as a matter of course - my sister had to pay privately for all 3 of hers. In London I think all the hospitals offer them.

They also won't do any GD testing here unless they think there is a good chance that you might fail it. Nor will they do any internals unless you go over dates (might do a sweep) or are in active labour - you can sit at 2cm dilated for 3 weeks, or be in active labour for over 20 hours and not even finger-tip dilated. Internals merely increase the chances of infection so they don't like to do them.

On the plus side, we get Entonox which is seriously good stuff. You also get lots of help after the birth - the midwives will come out to see you for the first 10 days after you get home and the LCs should come and see you in the hospital and at home afterwards if you are struggling.

Just out of interest, which hospital are you booked with? My best friend is an OB in London so I have the low-down on most of them! I was at St Thomas's which I can't say enough good things about.

It's a massive anticlimax at the beginning - you're all excited and nervous about being pregnant and they just say... that's great, congratulations, see you in a month or so.

 

[mayerling]

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Pandora, the information you've just given me is amazing! And I have loads of questions. I'm just sitting here waiting for my booking appt with the midwife but I'll write back after that's over with my comments, questions, etc.

 

[stephbolt]

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Hi ladies!

Choro, glad I'm not the only one who is overwhelmed by my belly!

PetitePoire, I think I was 5+ weeks before my test was super dark. I stopped testing right around 6 weeks once I started feeling sick all the time! I can totally relate to the emotionalness and the crazy dreams too! Being pregnant is so weird. Glad telling your family went well!

Mayerling, sorry your doctor is being so difficult. I think Pandora has a good point about finding someone who gives you better service if you truly feel ignored. Hope the midwife booking appt went well!

Missy, congrats on 12 weeks! Hope your test results are ok. And wow to that Ravens game on Thanksgiving! Great ending to the day. How was NY?

Sugarpie, so sorry you are still feeling ick even with the Zofran. Hope the rest of the first tri goes quickly for you!

China, yes, Dear Sophie Lee kills me too! We're happy to still have you around here for now, but you are totally for real big girl pregnant now, wooo hooo!

PPM, ugh to getting sick at work! The preggie drops helped with my nausea at work, hope you can find something to help you get through teaching!

Hi to anyone I missed!

AFM, Thanksgiving was wonderful! I hosted for the first time for my parents, MIL, and sister and BIL, and everything turned out wonderfully! It was so nice to not have to travel anywhere either. DH and I ventured out on Black Friday to pick up a new camera since my old one met an untimely death when I dropped it on the slate floor in our house. We splurged on a DSLR with some early birthday money we got and it is amazing! So excited to learn a little more about it so we can take good pictures of our LO.

Going to the midwife after work today and so hoping we get to hear the heartbeat. I'm trusting everything is going well so far but it would be nice to have some confirmation. I'm 10w4d today!

 

[Missy0483]

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Steph - Thank you! Yes, the game was good, had me freaking out for a bit towards the end! NY was fun! I need better shoes though. I wore my favorite pair and I've worn them so much that they no longer feel good when I walk! I believe I have heels spurs, so I felt like I was walking on rocks towards the end of the day! The pair of shoes I have are Dockers slip ons, pretty much like clogs and they were the first pair of shoes that didn't make my feet hurt, almost like they "corrected" my feet because other shoes didn't hurt as bad either! I'll have to find a new pair somewhere.

I don't know if it's too early, but I think I may be feeling some "flutters" or gas? I've never had gas feel like this before. Usually gas pains are uncomfortable for me. It's been on the same side every time and it almost feels like a slight muscle twitch. Actually, feeling it now as I type...hmmm.

Anyway...I guess I'll be moving on to the big Pregnant thread! I will continue reading here and reply to your posts! I'll update you ladies tomorrow after my appointment and then I'll be moving on

 

[PetitiePoire]

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Missy- have fun in the big preggo thread. That's so exciting!

Steph- thanks for the testing info. I know it's not any sort of guarantee but it is nice to think I could be farther. I would love that as it would be less time to worry!

Pandora- although the info wasnt for me, I found it very interesting. I am from the US, but live in Europe (France) so I am curious to see how this pregnancy goes there. I've already had experience with doctors there and it has been a completely different experience. I have a feeling it will be more laid back like the UK, unfortunately I read everything in English so I get the American perspective and assume it must be that way.

AFM- still nothing exciting to report. I am officially counting down until I can return home. DH leaves in a few days, so I caved and frantically called doctors to get an appointment here in hopes that we could hear a heartbeat or anything that would ease my mind. Unfortunately it wouldn't be until after he left, so I'll just wait it out. Some even said it would still be too early?? I could be as much as 8-9 weeks... Is that really too early? Oh well. Today I go shopping, so I will be buying more sticks! That will keep me relaxed for another few days until anxiety kicks back in. In other news, my much younger brother (barely an adult) has already bought baby gifts. I think that is the cause of my anxiety. I'm thrilled that he is happy, but not so that I don't have any medical proof that something is in there!

Hope you ladies are having a wonderful week. sorry if I missed anyone. I am terrible at remembering what I just read.

 

[mayerling]

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I'm back

Well, I had my booking appt with the midwife and I have to say that I enjoyed it a lot more than the ones I've had with the GPs. Although she did nothing but fill forms, she was still much more approachable with the GPs and didn't seem to patronise me or DH every two seconds. She said I won't see her again until about 16 weeks but I shouldn't hesitate to call/text/send smoke signals/etc if I need to talk to her about anything.

Pandora, I have some questions about the stuff you mentioned:
1. Should I just go to boots and ask for promethazine or is there a brand name I should go for?
2. Does NT stand for nuchal test? If so, I'm having that done in early January just before I hit the 13w mark. It's good that my area offers this test. I was under the impression it was standard practice everywhere in the UK.
3. You've convinced me about going the CVS route. Having to go through induced labour just seems like adding insult to injury.
4. I'd love to say which hospital I'm booked with, but I'm no longer in London so if I give the name of the hospital I'm pretty much giving away where I live - and I'm really paranoid about who might be watching these boards!

Pregnancy care here is ok, but I would really love it if I could be offered more things to get me in touch with my pregnancy if you know what I mean. A good friend of mine said she didn't really start feeling the bond until she heard the heartbeat and I'm king of bummed that I won't be offered that here. It's one of the reasons I intend to see my OBGYN back home when I'm there for the holidays.

In other news, I had a bunch of antenatal blood and urine tests done and they all came back normal

Come on, ladies, let's liven up these boards! How are you all doing?

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

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It's office hours at school and I'm feeling well, but this morning I had to leave my advisement kiddos to throw up. The bright (?) side is that my mentor teacher is right next door, 22 weeks preggo, and just as miserable!! We both went home sick yesterday, too. There's and endless supply of crackers, gingerale, ginger candy, Tums and Gas-X floating between our rooms it's awful that she still feels crummy, but it's nice to work with someone who understands.

 

[Pandora II]

Re: Re:

I'm back

Well, I had my booking appt with the midwife and I have to say that I enjoyed it a lot more than the ones I've had with the GPs. Although she did nothing but fill forms, she was still much more approachable with the GPs and didn't seem to patronise me or DH every two seconds. She said I won't see her again until about 16 weeks but I shouldn't hesitate to call/text/send smoke signals/etc if I need to talk to her about anything.

Pandora, I have some questions about the stuff you mentioned:
1. Should I just go to boots and ask for promethazine or is there a brand name I should go for?
2. Does NT stand for nuchal test? If so, I'm having that done in early January just before I hit the 13w mark. It's good that my area offers this test. I was under the impression it was standard practice everywhere in the UK.
3. You've convinced me about going the CVS route. Having to go through induced labour just seems like adding insult to injury.
4. I'd love to say which hospital I'm booked with, but I'm no longer in London so if I give the name of the hospital I'm pretty much giving away where I live - and I'm really paranoid about who might be watching these boards!

Pregnancy care here is ok, but I would really love it if I could be offered more things to get me in touch with my pregnancy if you know what I mean. A good friend of mine said she didn't really start feeling the bond until she heard the heartbeat and I'm king of bummed that I won't be offered that here. It's one of the reasons I intend to see my OBGYN back home when I'm there for the holidays.

In other news, I had a bunch of antenatal blood and urine tests done and they all came back normal

Come on, ladies, let's liven up these boards! How are you all doing?

Glad the appointment went well!

Answers:

1) The brand name is Phenergan, but just asking for promethazine is fine. DO NOT tell them it is for you unless you want to traipse round looking for another chemist! It's one you have to ask for rather than it just being on the shelves.

2) Yes, NT is Nuchal Test. 12 weeks is a good time - if you get good pics, it's sometimes possible to tell the gender (you don't see a willy or anything like that as the genital tubercule is almost identical in both male and female at that stage, but there is a thing called nub theory that goes by the angle of the tubercule compared with the spine. The forum In-gender is brilliant at analysing them. Before 12 weeks it's very hard to do.

3) If you do need to do CVS, try and convince them to send you to somewhere like Kings as they are doing them all the time. If I was ever to have another, I'd probably do CVS anyway unless my numbers were amazing as I'd be in my 40's.

4) Is it a big hospital or a little one? Can you say the basic area/county? One thing I have seen with friends is that you are better off in a hospital setting for a 1st baby rather than a midwife birth centre as you have access to epidurals and if anything goes wrong you are not having to be sent off to hospital. Even though a hospital may have 24/7 anaesthetists, it still doesn't mean you get an epidural straight away. St Thomas's has 3 on duty and I still had to wait 2 hours for one as they were all in theatre, so if you do want one then ask early!

I'm afraid that when it's all free, it tends to be fairly no frills. All the money is put into the essential stuff rather than the fun or unviable bits. For example they won't try to prevent a miscarriage before 18 weeks - unless you are seeing a specialist because of recurrent miscarriage.

Other things that are different: In the USA if your waters break they want you to deliver within 24 hours, here they will start inducing you if the baby is born within 36 hours (I went 54 hours).
- They don't test for Strep B.
- They don't put ointment in the baby's eyes.
- There are NO nurseries, it's all rooming in - and you don't get a private room unless you pay/have an infectious disease/have a medical need (I got one because of the opiate withdrawal). Normally it's 3-4 women to a room.
- There are normally strict rules on visitors - my hospital you had to give the names of a max. of 2 people who would be allowed in the delivery room, no-one else admitted until you are on the postnatal ward and then a max of 2 visitors + the father and strict hours. So, if your parents and IL's are planning to be there for the birth, they could be waiting a very long time to see you (normally you don't go to postnatal for a couple of hours after the birth)

You can pay to get private scans if you want. It's about $120 or so.

Oh, and some hospitals won't tell you the gender even at the 20 week scan - especially if you live in an area with a high Asian population. I think it's ridiculous - if you are going to terminate over having a girl then you'd probably get a private scan done anyway, so they may as well tell us all. My hospital was happy to tell, but I've got friends who ended up paying for a gender scan separately.

I think it's awful that we don't all get the NT scan - I know they were planning to roll it out everywhere, but so much comes down to what the local PCT decided to fund. Total postcode lottery.

When you have the baby you also need to bring EVERYTHING with you. They don't have nappies or wipes or pads for you or anything unless you are literally a total emergency. It's also illegal for companies to give out formula samples in hospitals here and the formula they do have is kept under lock and key (you will also get VERY disapproving looks if you don't intend to at least give breastfeeding a go - just to give you a heads up!).

If you are doing antenatal classes, a lot of people do NCT - more for the social aspect than the actual classes. I didn't do NCT as round here it's all very lavender oil and whale music and I knew I was going in with a big arrow on my back saying 'Epidural goes in here' plus my daughter would be born opiate dependent and I could be bothered with the 'looks' I would get from them. I did the hospital's own course which was mainly aimed at high-risk mothers - my group were all multiples bar me. It was good because I got to tour the labour wards etc and the girl running it was the midwife I actually got in labour.

It's worth checking the staffing. St Thomas's had a 1 to 1 policy so the midwife was only looking after 1 woman at a time, but some hospitals have 1 midwife looking after 3 or 4 women which can end up as a total disaster. My sister was left alone for most of her first 36 hour labour and wasn't very happy. She had polyhydramnios which they hadn't spotted (my father had 3 weeks earlier but didn't say anything so as not to scare her) and her daughter was born with a cleft palate. The ***** of a midwife then went crazy at her for not breastfeeding correctly - you can't actually breastfeed babies with cleft palates as they can't form a vacuum.

Another girl on PS was at the same hospital (Shrewsbury) and had an equally awful time.

The care you get depends so much on which hospital you are at and which midwife you have. They are getting better at making it a good experience in many places - we had birthing pools, an indoor garden with fountains and super-swish new birth unit and great midwives (it's a top training hospital so people really want to work there) but much of the rest of the UK has yet to catch up.

Feel free to ask as many questions as you want!

 

[ChinaCat]

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Mayerling- Pandora (or as I like to call her, Pandy ) gave great information. Just wanted to say that though I am not in the UK, I did a CVS. So if you get to that point and have any questions, let me know.

Missy- I *think* it's too early to feel anything BUT it does feel like gas bubbles, so maybe you are feeling it early! I have/had an anterior placenta with both pregnancies, so I won't feel anything till later. Did you just carry your pee jug in with you? Is it clear or at least colored so you aren't announcing to the world what you've got in there? Hope your appt went well today.

AFM- Had an appt as well today. Got the final test results back from my CVS and ALL were normal. SO relieved. Will probably head over the big girls thread, but will still check in on you here!

Also, I have an envelope in my bag with the gender. It's SO weird that I could just open it and know. Will definitely hold off for awhile- with Oliver, my husband and I took the envelope with us on a trip to Puerto Rico and opened it at sunset on the beach. So just ripping it open on a cold Tuesday doesn't really match up.

My 2 year old somehow knows we are having a baby even though we haven't really told him or talked about it with him. At Thanksgiving he ran into the room, lifted up his shirt and said "Baby in tummy! Baby in tummy! I want a baby sister!" I have NO idea how he knows babies are in bellies. He doesn't know anyone else pregnant, we haven't "told" him that and while I'm showing a tiny bit, not enough for him to notice. Kids are crazy!

Have told everyone at work except my main boss. All went well, but it's just so awkward. I feel like I"m announcing "Hello boss man. Just wanted to let you know that my husband and I totally did it a few months ago. Just thought you should know. "

Everyone, hang in there. For the sickies, I am finally feeling (almost) back to normal, so there is light at the end of the tunnel. I can even drink water now!

 

[PetitiePoire]

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PPM- glad you have a friend at work who understands. I'm sure that will make you feel better, especially having all of the soothing foods around.

China- yay for everything being normal! I love how you found out about Oliver. That's a really sweet idea. Do you have any vacation plans to open this one? I'll have to pop over to the other thread to check and see when you open it. Any feelings on what it might be?

 

[ChinaCat]

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Petite- No vacation plans anytime soon. Will have to get creative! I will pop back and let you know what it is when we open it. Where in France are you (if you feel ok sharing)? I spent a semester in Paris and loved it. Well actually I was pretty miserable for the first half, but loved every minute once I got used to it.

 

[Pandora II]

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Great news on the CVS results China!

And LOL on the feeling that you're telling your boss that you DTD. A friend of mine who is a doctor with 4 kids said she was so embarrassed when she got KU with the first because EVERYONE would know she had had sex!

Pandy... oh dear, oh dear

 

[PetitiePoire]

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China- in the north east of France. About an hour from Germany and luxembourg, and an hour and a half by train to Paris. I love being so close to so many cultures. It's such a big change from the US ( at least for me).

I forgot to comment on the telling people. I felt the same way with telling my family. It's really awkward, although I never think about it twice when someone else says their x many months along. I can only hope they don't think about it either! Haha

 

[ChinaCat]

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Thanks Pandora. I wish you'd get pregnant again just for my personal enjoyment of your posts. Though can you imagine TWO Daisys????????

Petite- How lovely! What an amazing place to be. Maybe your kiddo will grow up quadrilingual? If that's the correct word!

 

[Pandora II]

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Thanks Pandora. I wish you'd get pregnant again just for my personal enjoyment of your posts. Though can you imagine TWO Daisys????????

Petite- How lovely! What an amazing place to be. Maybe your kiddo will grow up quadrilingual? If that's the correct word!

That, my dear, is why I am not pregnant again!

 

[Missy0483]

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China - Yup I put it in a grocery bag, but the jug was bright orange so people probably had an idea when I walked up to the lab window with it I'll have to ask where the placenta is at my next ultrasound, kinda curious about that. I've felt the "gas bubble" feeling on and off all day today too. It feels so strange, like I can feel the blood pumping in my stomach or something. I thought it was too early to feel anything also. Maybe it is just more blood flow in that area that I'm feeling. My appointment is tomorrow afternoon so I will report back with my results! So cool that you have the gender right at your fingertips already. How far along are you again? You are so patient to be able to keep it hidden from yourself haha.

 

[mayerling]

Re: Re:

2) Yes, NT is Nuchal Test. 12 weeks is a good time - if you get good pics, it's sometimes possible to tell the gender (you don't see a willy or anything like that as the genital tubercule is almost identical in both male and female at that stage, but there is a thing called nub theory that goes by the angle of the tubercule compared with the spine. The forum In-gender is brilliant at analysing them. Before 12 weeks it's very hard to do.

4) Is it a big hospital or a little one? Can you say the basic area/county? One thing I have seen with friends is that you are better off in a hospital setting for a 1st baby rather than a midwife birth centre as you have access to epidurals and if anything goes wrong you are not having to be sent off to hospital. Even though a hospital may have 24/7 anaesthetists, it still doesn't mean you get an epidural straight away. St Thomas's has 3 on duty and I still had to wait 2 hours for one as they were all in theatre, so if you do want one then ask early!

- There are NO nurseries, it's all rooming in - and you don't get a private room unless you pay/have an infectious disease/have a medical need (I got one because of the opiate withdrawal). Normally it's 3-4 women to a room.

Oh, and some hospitals won't tell you the gender even at the 20 week scan - especially if you live in an area with a high Asian population. I think it's ridiculous - if you are going to terminate over having a girl then you'd probably get a private scan done anyway, so they may as well tell us all. My hospital was happy to tell, but I've got friends who ended up paying for a gender scan separately.

When you have the baby you also need to bring EVERYTHING with you. They don't have nappies or wipes or pads for you or anything unless you are literally a total emergency. It's also illegal for companies to give out formula samples in hospitals here and the formula they do have is kept under lock and key (you will also get VERY disapproving looks if you don't intend to at least give breastfeeding a go - just to give you a heads up!).

Thanks for the info on how to guess the gender! I'm actually one of those people who will not be able to wait until the birth to find out. Thankfully my hospital does give this info at the 20 week scan.

The hospital is a very big teaching hospital in a well-to-do area of the south east. So I'm confident they'll have the medical resources should I need them. I'm afraid if I mention the county I'd be giving myself away.
You have me worried now about how there's 3-4 women per ward, with their babies, and their guests. It can't be very easy to get any rest after the birth with all those people in the room

I fully intend to breastfeed but it's a bit alarming that they won't offer any formula. What if something goes wrong and I can't breastfeed? The baby starves? Thanks for the heads up on bringing my own stuff.

By the way, do I ever get to hear the heartbeat? Is it at the nuchal scan?

 

[Pandora II]

Re: Re:

Thanks for the info on how to guess the gender! I'm actually one of those people who will not be able to wait until the birth to find out. Thankfully my hospital does give this info at the 20 week scan.

The hospital is a very big teaching hospital in a well-to-do area of the south east. So I'm confident they'll have the medical resources should I need them. I'm afraid if I mention the county I'd be giving myself away.
You have me worried now about how there's 3-4 women per ward, with their babies, and their guests. It can't be very easy to get any rest after the birth with all those people in the room

I fully intend to breastfeed but it's a bit alarming that they won't offer any formula. What if something goes wrong and I can't breastfeed? The baby starves? Thanks for the heads up on bringing my own stuff.

By the way, do I ever get to hear the heartbeat? Is it at the nuchal scan?

Okay, I have a fair idea where you are - my parents live in East Sussex and I was at boarding school in Kent so I know the SE very well.

Big teaching hospital = good!

You will probably find it odd that you most likely won't ever see the OB. They only deliver the baby if there are complications, normally the midwives deliver the babies. On the other hand you don't have the bizarre thing of having to wait for the OB to arrive to actually deliver the baby - when it comes, it comes!

Postnatal is pretty grim wherever you are - they're always under staffed and over-worked. Most people try to get the heck out asap. You can go home as early as 6 hours after the birth if it was uncomplicated and the paediatrician has checked the baby over. C-section you are stuck for 48 hours.

You don't get any rest in the wards as there are always people coming and going and babies crying. There just isn't the space to have private rooms - luckily my hospital had 3 available and I was allowed one purely because babies that are going through withdrawal need dark and quiet. (I totally lost it on the 3rd day after the birth and the psychiatric team had another bed brought into my room and my husband moved in for the week which was lovely, but VERY unusual.)

Need for rest is one of the reasons that they are so strict on guests - at Tommy's visiting hours were 10am - 9pm for the father and 3pm - 8pm for other visitors and no under-16's except the baby's own siblings. Also they want to reduce the risk of any infections.

(St Thomas's had a birth centre and a home-from-home centre next door to each other. The birth centre had epidurals and was more medicalised, the home-from-home was midwife led and Entenox only, you had to move if you wanted an epidural, but they had birthing pools and you stayed in the one room until you went home - and there was a sofa bed for the father so he could stay there with you the whole time. Unfortunately if you needed a c-section you got sent to the birth centre and then down to post-natal and they couldn't stay. But is did offer the best of both worlds - the two sections were separated by the obstetric operating theatres so in an emergency you were also in the right place whichever side you started out on).

Some hospitals kick the father's out even during labour after 9pm if they don't think the baby is due for a while. Personally I think that is awful and it would have stressed me out hugely.

With the breastfeeding, you won't know that early that you can't. The baby's stomach is only the size of a small marble so they need very little at the beginning and all you have is colostrum anyway. Milk doesn't normally come in properly till the 3rd day. It's nature's way, so babies don't need more than the colostrum and they won't starve.

My milk didn't come in for over 2 weeks and Daisy did end up with formula - they weren't too happy but she lost a huge amount of wait after 8 days and the neonatologists ordered it. The hospitals can't give you formula unless there is real medical need or they will lose their 'Baby-Friendly' status.

There's a policy of doing skin-to-skin straight after delivery - they don't bath the baby or anything, they just pass it straight up onto your stomach or chest, towel it off a bit and then cut the cord and they like you to try and feed straight away as the baby is normally wide awake for the first hour. Daisy didn't get a bath till she was about 4 days old!

Very, very few people really can't breastfeed. A lot give up because a) it hurts like crazy the first 2-3 weeks (worse than labour IMO), b) they never really wanted to and c) they don't like not knowing how much the baby is getting (boobs aren't see-through like bottles).

I always tell people to give it 6 weeks and if it's still hell then consider stopping then. After 3 weeks your nipples toughen up and you suddenly find it much easier. I would never have guessed at 2 weeks how much I would enjoy breast-feeding 2 weeks later - the oxytocin high is very nice, a bit like a couple of glasses of nice red wine...

My problem feeding was due to a) being severely anaemic - I had a massive haemorrhage and ended up in ICU and having 5 blood transfusions over 2 days, b) being on opiates and c) my body having been through severe trauma and stress (I was unconcious for several hours after the birth).

The midwives - once I escaped from hospital after 8 days - who came to the house were brilliant about helping me get her off the formula on onto breast only. For what it's worth, I think it's a good idea to have a few boxes of Aptimil so that when the baby is screaming and you have raw bleeding nipples you can shove some formula into them rather than sitting bawling your eyes out!

Also worth getting a hand-pump till you know that you will definitely feed, they're much cheaper than the electric ones and you are in charge so it's better if you have sore nipples. I pumped one day and breast fed the next for a week or so to give mine a chance to heal up. I bought the Tommee Tippee one and the Closer to Nature bottles - both were great and easy to clean, and you can sterilise them in the microwave in 2 minutes.

It's also normal for babies to lose weight in the first week.

You will definitely hear the heart-beat at the NT scan. Depending on the sonographer you will get a lot of information at the scan. From what people on PS have said it seems that the sonographers don't say much in the USA, mine pointed out all the bits and told us what she was checking and said that certain things were a good sign. She also calculated the numbers and told us the risks etc. Tommy's had a separate large screen for the parents to watch the scan on which was nice. Still had to pay £2 for the pictures, but it's a lot less than the co-pays or insurance in the USA so I'm not complaining - plus I'd rather that they charge for pics and have another bed in the NICU for the cost (my hospital does 8,000 births a year so that would be a lot of free pictures!).

My midwives did the heart beat at every scan after 14 weeks. They don't like to do it earlier as it can be very hit and miss before then and if they can't find it then the mother starts to panic and as they can't offer an ultrasound, the mother really panics. I had a scan at 8 weeks because I had a lot of bleeding - I only got one because my hospital had an Emergency Early Pregnancy Unit and a sonographer available. I could see the heartbeat on the screen, but they couldn't do sound. Often they can't see it on a scan until after 6 weeks anyway.

If your GP or midwife has a doppler then they will probably do the heartbeat at the appointments after 14/16 weeks. I think the appointments are about every 4-6 weeks until 35 weeks and then every week, but each area has slightly different protocols.

Nearer the time, I can give you a list of what to take with you.

Books I would recommend are Lesley Regan's 'Your Pregnancy Week by Week' which is brilliant, 'The Panic-Free Pregnancy' that tells you that you can eat ham and sushi and dye your hair and explains why!

Also Claire Byam-Cook's 'Breast-feeding Without Tears' and 'What to Expect When You're Breastfeeding and What If You Can't?'. She's a midwife and nurse and the UK breast-feeding guru. She also was one of the rare few who really could not breast-feed and so is less Nazi like over it all. I've met her and she is the nicest person. She also does private consultations if you are really desperate - and I can't think of anyone I'd rather have turn up and help if I couldn't get any help elsewhere).

 

[stephbolt]

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Just a quick note to say that the appointment yesterday went great, and we got to hear the heartbeat! So cool to finally get confirmation that there is something in there! She didn't count the exact rate but said it was "around 140."

 

[Missy0483]

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Yay Steph!!! I bet you're feeling some relief now! So cool isn't it! DH is going with me today so he'll get to hear it for the first time! Mine was 170 at my last appointment when I was 10 weeks.

 

[mayerling]

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Pandora, you're a treasure!

Steph, hurray for hearing the heartbeat!!!!

 

[mayerling]

Re:

Come to think of it, back home 6 hours after having the baby?!!! I was thinking I could stay in the hospital for a couple of days with round the clock care, people to help me feed, change, put down for a nap, anything really so I don't have to face doing it on my own so soon after the baby is born! What's it like in the US? Back home, you definitely spend a night or two in the hospital with full-time help after a vaginal birth.

Pandora, yes, I'd definitely appreciate a list on what to bring with me as well as a list on what to buy for the baby. Basically, any wisdom you're able to impart would be much appreciated!