Income to diamond ratio?

[dreamofdiamonds]

Thanks for your input everyone.

I am still very young. In my mid twenties. My fiance and I were lucky to have most of our education paid for through scholarships or grants so we are lucky as far as not being in great debt. We both have no car payment. Both want a home in the next 3 years.

As far as having a baby.....

I am very aware of the consequences having waiting for having kids later in life. I do plan on adopting in my forties...

I guess I put so much emphasis in having a diamond that I love because it is something I have to wear everyday and I feel it represents me. That might be crazy, just the way I feel tho''.

Thanks-

 

[DiamondFlame]

Don''t ever equate your self worth to the size of the stone you wear, honey.

Besides, having a 3 carat now is only going to take the fun out of your future diamond upgrade projects...

 

[tyty333]

Date: 7/14/2009 2:25:48 PM
Author: DiamondFlame
Don''t ever equate your self worth to the size of the stone you wear, honey.

Besides, having a 3 carat now is only going to take the fun out of your future diamond upgrade projects...

Wise words DiamondFlame!

 

[rockpaperscissors67]

Date: 7/13/2009 7:29:29 PM
Author: swingirl

Date: 7/13/2009 7:24:41 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 7/13/2009 5:40:56 PM
Author: part gypsy
I agree with others it is a personal decision what is appropriate to spend, and it should be money that is available to be spent (not allocated for emergency savings, house fund, etc). But since you asked;

For my anniversary ring (I don''t have a traditional engagement ring) it was 1/4 my husband''s income, but less than 5% of our combined income. But to us it was a big purchase. As far as not having children until your 40''s, I know it is a very personal question, but why? I had my 2 kids at 35 and 39 and while necessary from needing a stable job, other reasons I wouldn''t say it is ideal. Even if you are adopting, your energy level goes down, and ask yourself if you want to be hitting 60 when your kid is graduating from highschool.

nope !!

And paying for college when you approaching retirement and facing possible health issues? Not good.

I''m 41 and SO is turning 48 next Friday. I''m almost 13 weeks pregnant with my 6th child (his 5th, our 2nd together -- 9 total). Since I''ve been raising kids for the past 20 years, I can honestly say that there are benefits and disadvantages to having a baby at pretty much ANY age. Plus, health issues can also crop up at any time.

As for paying for college, we both believe that kids appreciate a college education more and are willing to work harder when it''s on their dime. We''ll help, but we''re not footing the entire bill. Neither of our sets of parents did.

My engagement ring was about 3% of SO''s yearly income when we bought it 4 years ago. With all of these kids, I was happy to be able to get a 1.15 ct, E, VS2 princess. SO is well aware that at some point I would really, really like a 2.5-3 ct. old mine cut diamond and unless something catastrophic happens, I''m sure I''ll get it.

 

[treefrog]

Date: 7/14/2009 9:43:00 AM
Author: dreamofdiamonds
Thanks for your input everyone.

I am still very young. In my mid twenties. My fiance and I were lucky to have most of our education paid for through scholarships or grants so we are lucky as far as not being in great debt. We both have no car payment. Both want a home in the next 3 years.

I don''t see any coorelation to the income to ring cost ratio. There are just too many variables.

You say you''re not in ''great debt''. Maybe I''m wrong but this implies some debt to me and I know you don''t have house or car payments. I''m not going to ask if you''re both maxing out retirement contributions.

At $20,000, you''re going to be on the absolute low end of quality on a 3ct. Maybe size is more important to you but I personally think a diamond should really perform and for that, you''re looking at an additional $15,000. (A nice chunk towards a down payment on that house you want). I can think of several statements a $20,000 3ct would make in your situation but honestly, I wouldn''t want to be on the receiving end of any of them.

In today''s economy, I think there are better options. Starting with a financial planner that can evaluate where you are, where you''re headed, and can help you to devise a plan to get the right diamond.

Please don''t take this the wrong way. I''m truly trying to help and mean and wish the best for you both.

Treefrog

 

[setell]

"I guess I put so much emphasis in having a diamond that I love because it is something I have to wear everyday and I feel it represents me. That might be crazy, just the way I feel tho''."

I think you have to ask yourself if having a large rock is what represents you. I personally will never spend 20k for a ring (even if I''m rolling in dough in the future) but that is just me. I personally think if I''m wearing a huge diamond everyday I''ll be scared vs my smaller diamond. Something about being the prospect of being mugged scares the crap out of me and I''m a very conservative person by nature when it comes to money. I think I may have beaten this to death but if you don''t have the 20k in cash sitting in your bank account right now to pay for the ring then I think it''s a good idea to get a cheaper ring and just upgrade later. I don''t think the average size on PS is 3ct''s too as most are in the 1-1.5ct''s range (from my observations). Also it isn''t a competition as to how "big" you can go too as long as you are happy with your diamond. A friend of ours has a 2ct they got from a mall store so it cost them more then 20k''s. I have no desire to be in a size competition with her as I love the diamond I have. It''s way smaller than her''s but I think my diamond is beautiful and unique!

Financial wise, have you set a wedding budget? Emergency fund in case either one of you get laid off? Debt repayment plan? If you want a house in 3 years a down payment savings plan? Is there a certain % you have to meet to not have to pay mortgage insurance in the US? In Canada if you don''t have 20% down payment you pay steep fees to get a mortgage.

 

[Moh 10]

A few of us spend way way more than we "should".
We love diamonds and make sacrifices to obtain extraordinary specimens.
We have diamonds typically owned by much wealthier people.
We pay no attention to formulae, or common sense.
We find a way to get our diamonds.

I know a woman who is a secretary.
She has a very modest income.
Her passion is opera.
She scrimps and saves and lives a meager life but once every 10 years she flies to Europe to attend a series of opera performances by the best opera singers of our day.
She says she is sure she must be the lowest-income person in the concert hall.
I know an man with a 9 foot concert grand piano, and little else, in his tiny apartment in a very inexpensive neighborhood.
He considers himself wealthy to live with the daily vivid experience of Bach, Mozart, Chopin, and Ravel in his home.
These are two of the happiest people I know.

You can't have everything in life.
But a few of us happily exchange a "normal and balanced" life for one that permits an extreme passion or two.

 

[decodelighted]

If you truly believe this stone will "represent you" ...

Date: 7/14/2009 4:49:42 PM
Author: treefrog
At $20,000, you''re going to be on the absolute low end of quality on a 3ct. Maybe size is more important to you but I personally think a diamond should really perform and for that, you''re looking at an additional $15,000. (A nice chunk towards a down payment on that house you want). I can think of several statements a $20,000 3ct would make in your situation but honestly, I wouldn''t want to be on the receiving end of any of them.

DITTO. And *wince*. I think maybe you''re just in the discovery stage here about diamonds. Maybe its not time for conclusions just yet.

 

[swingirl]

Date: 7/14/2009 5:28:26 PM
Author: Moh 10
I know a woman who is a secretary.
She has a very modest income.
Her passion is opera.
She scrimps and saves and lives a meager life but once every 10 years she flies to Europe to attend a series of opera performances of the best opera singers of our day.

I know an man with a 9 foot concert grand piano, and little else, in his tiny apartment in a very inexpensive neighborhood.
He considers himself wealthy to live with the daily vivid experience of Bach, Mozart, Chopin, and Ravel in his home.

You can't have everything in life.
But a few of us happily exchange a 'normal and balanced' life for one that permits an extreme passion or two.

Very true!! But I bet these people never question their choices.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 7/14/2009 2:25:48 PM
Author: DiamondFlame
Don''t ever equate your self worth to the size of the stone you wear, honey.

Besides, having a 3 carat now is only going to take the fun out of your future diamond upgrade projects...

not if the future upgrade is a 5ct.

 

[plethora23]

Date: 7/14/2009 6:02:08 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 7/14/2009 2:25:48 PM
Author: DiamondFlame
Don''t ever equate your self worth to the size of the stone you wear, honey.

Besides, having a 3 carat now is only going to take the fun out of your future diamond upgrade projects...

not if the future upgrade is a 5ct.

Yep that''s true! I started out with a 3 carat so here I am waiting/planning for the 5 carat...

 

[Shopaholic]

Date: 7/14/2009 6:02:08 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 7/14/2009 2:25:48 PM
Author: DiamondFlame
Don''t ever equate your self worth to the size of the stone you wear, honey.

Besides, having a 3 carat now is only going to take the fun out of your future diamond upgrade projects...

not if the future upgrade is a 5ct.

haha! I swear Dancing Fire - every one of your posts that I have read always manages to crack me up!!! I laugh and then I think "ahhh, just brilliant!"

 

[Gypsy]

Honestly, I've been thinking about this. And well... here are some additional thought.

If SIZE and the impression of it is what you want most. Maybe looking at a1.80-2.0 carat oval G-H color eyeclean SI would be the best choice for you (or a pear). They run about 14K.

If eyeclean this one would be a lovely potential option to explore. http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/F-SI2-Ideal-Cut-Oval-Diamond-1180992.asp And at 9.3 by 7.2 you are talking about a LOT of finger coverage. Ovals look HUGE for their carat weight if you chose them carefully. They are also more unique than rounds. If you can stick to 13K... add 2K to that for a white gold halo (meleediamond frame around the diamond) and you are at 15K. Still more than I would spend, honestly. But it will look HUGE on you.

http://www.since1910.com/engagement-rings/tacori/settings-with-sidestones/tacori-setting-with-pave-set-diamonds-15ct-tw-t-2620rd-set-1037.aspxhttp://www.since1910.com/engagement...-set-diamonds-29ct-tw-t-2620rdp-set-1245.aspx Here's a nice setting by Tacori that would give you a nice amount of extra coverage and can be made for an oval. Seriously with this thing on your finger... everyone will think it's 3 carats, at least!


THAT SAID. You absolutely should not equate ANY part of your self image with diamond size.

I'm a diamond junkie. My husband and I make more than you guys do. I wear a 1.09 carat diamond ring. And honestly the attention I get at work (I work in a very wealthy area, and at a company with a lot of high paid people) wearing this thing is ridiculous ALREADY. But we bought the diamond first. Then waited 4 years to buy the setting. And then waited another 2 to get me a pendant. Scrimp save. And pay it in cash. I don't wear designer fashions. My favorite places to shop are Marshalls and TJ Max and outlets. I don't do fancy expensive hair colors or cuts. I don't get my nails done...you know, sacrifice and save. Discretionary income goes to the bling budget (now that the wedding is over... trust me ELOPE!).

 

[Diva0413]

Date: 7/14/2009 9:11:50 PM
Author: Gypsy
Honestly, I''ve been thinking about this. And well... here are some additional thought.

If SIZE and the impression of it is what you want most. Maybe looking at a1.80-2.0 carat oval G-H color eyeclean SI would be the best choice for you (or a pear). They run about 14K.

If eyeclean this one would be a lovely choice. http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/F-SI2-Ideal-Cut-Oval-Diamond-1180992.asp And at 9.3 by 7.2 you are talking about a LOT of finger coverage. Ovals look HUGE for their carat weight if you chose them carefully. They are also more unique than rounds. If you can stick to 13K... add 2K to that for a white gold halo (meleediamond frame around the diamond) and you are at 15K. Still more than I would spend, honestly. But it will look HUGE on you.

http://www.since1910.com/engagement-rings/tacori/settings-with-sidestones/tacori-setting-with-pave-set-diamonds-15ct-tw-t-2620rd-set-1037.aspxhttp://www.since1910.com/engagement...-set-diamonds-29ct-tw-t-2620rdp-set-1245.aspx Here''s a nice setting by Tacori that would give you a nice amount of extra coverage and can be made for an oval. Seriously with this thing on your finger... everyone will think it''s 3 carats, at least!


THAT SAID. You absolutely should not equate ANY part of your self image with diamond size.

I''m a diamond junkie. My husband and I make more than you guys do. I wear a 1.09 carat diamond ring. And honestly the attention I get at work (I work in a very wealthy area, and at a company with a lot of high paid people) wearing this thing is ridiculous ALREADY. But we bought the diamond first. Then waited 4 years to buy the setting. And then waited another 2 to get me a pendant. Scrimp save. And pay it in cash. I don''t wear designer fashions. My favorite places to shop are Marshalls and TJ Max and outlets. I don''t do fancy expensive hair colors or cuts. I don''t get my nails done. I bring my lunch from home... you know, sacrifice and save. Discretionary income goes to the bling budget (now that the wedding is over... trust me ELOPE!).

Well said Gypsy!

My FI and I are in our late 20s and also make more than you guys as well. And we live in NYC... With that said, neither him nor I considered needing a 20K ring or 3ct+ to show our status. The best thing for you to do is to go shopping. See exactly how much diamonds cost (a very good diamond) and don''t sacrifice quality for size. You''d be surprised that once you start trying rings on, size doesn''t matter as much as sparkle.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 7/14/2009 9:18:19 PM
Author: Diva0413
The best thing for you to do is to go shopping. See exactly how much diamonds cost (a very good diamond) and don''t sacrifice quality for size. You''d be surprised that once you start trying rings on, size doesn''t matter as much as sparkle.

Excellent point. I noticed on your earlier cushion-shopping thread that you were impressed by the size of a rock on a hand that looked to be about a 1.5 ct stone even though the picture claimed to be a 3 ct stone. Its entirely possible that you have a skewed impression of how big stones would look on your hand. You may be surprised at what you''d deem "big" -- especially if you do as Gypsy suggests & start looking at Ovals (&/or Pears).

 

[Gypsy]

DEFINITELY go shopping and try things on. Rounds look weird on my hands unless they are in squarish settings. And I was SHOCKED by how large and ostentatious (TO ME) a 1.5 carat round high set solitare looked on my stubby little fingers. Seriously I was at HoF and I was like... take it off, take it away... ahhhhhhhhhhhhh..... Now, give me a 1.5 carat Dream cut, and I'm thrilled (despite the smaller spread).

And my diamond was in a wide X-prong setting that didn't help it at all. But now it's in a halo and it just looks really bright, and large, plus the shank is thin, which helps. Settings make a huge difference. My ring gets more attention than my boss's 2.5 carat princess solitaire. It's not all about size. It a total package thing.

Also I ADORE east west set EC's and Ovals and Marquise. I tried some on

HORRID on me.

You just don't know until you try them on.

If you do like rounds. I would seriously consider an H color SI in 1.5 carats (around 11.5K if you pay cash) super ideal round in a setting like this puppy. Cause... talk about a BOOST. Setting is about 3K I think. So we're at 14.5K. And a whole LOTA bling. And if you buy from a dealer with a good upgrade policy like GOG or BGD, you can always upgrade the center. And set a glorious colored stone in the blingtastic setting.

This ring has a 1.5 round in it. Just for reference. https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/verragio-insignia-with-1-5-ct-aca.118395/

 

[TravelingGal]

Gah!

(That was my useless response.)

The best indicator of status the size of a rock, but the "size" of that thing between your years and what comes out of your mouth.

(That was my snarkly yet still useless response.)

20K on a 100K income with no house yet? WTF???

(That was my honest response.)

However people have to do what makes them happy. This may make you happy for the rest of your life and you may not have an opportunity to get such a ring again once you do have a mortgage etc. Or you may regret such a purchase. But everyone should have a chance to live and learn.

(My tactful response.)

 

[Gypsy]

And because I'm a PITA... I will tell you what I would pick, if size were important to me.


http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/G-SI1-Ideal-Cut-Oval-Diamond-1172297.asp With PS discount about 8K. And then AFTER A WHILE I'd get ahalo setting for it for up to like the one below (there are two bands on either side of the shank. It's a single shank ring), either custom, or stock. I'd just get the oval in a cheap solitare for now , then upgrade the setting in a couple of years-- would try to keep it to 8.5K MAX right now).

 

[Phoenix]

That is one GORGEOUS ring, Gypsy!!

. I assume it belongs to a PS'er. Lucky girl!!

You have any more pics or perhaps a linky?

 

[Gypsy]

Ahh... got it. https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/yoohoo-i-have-oval-pictures-to-share.53370/ The center is 3 carats (

so bad example) but... I was only meaning to show off the setting, cause it's my favorite halo for an oval because the proportions, prong set, and the way the stone sits ON the halo, and the way pave style and everything work so well.

 

[Phoenix]

Date: 7/15/2009 3:04:39 AM
Author: Gypsy
No. It''s Marvel''s or Marvals or Marvils? ring.

No worries, Gypsy. It *is* gorgeous though, and BIG!!

 

[Gypsy]

I found it and editted.

 

[Phoenix]

Thanks, Gypsy.

I am sure the OP will understand your point.

 

[Gypsy]

I hope so. Basically, I wouldn't spend more than 8.5K including the setting and would maximize my stone in a simple and cheap solitaire for now. And play the setting game later.
Honestly, I recently had a scare where I thought I had lost my ring, and I was TOTALLY panicked. And my husband was trying to calm me down as we are both frantically searching for it EVERYWHERE and he makes a joke that... I could get a bigger diamond if I wanted now, as I know more about spread (I have an asscher, pits for spread) and color (F) and clarity (VS1)... etc. And I just did NOT find it funny in the least. The ring is a symbol. Of the two of us and our commitment. When people compliment it, I always say "My husband did a great job" (Unless it's Psers, then you know... that's different, it's all about specs and stuff then). I don't think it's size or anything about it says anything about ME as a person-- other than... "Hey I was engaged at some point...look down, OH LOOK, I'm married now-- see the band!" NOW that I have it in it's permanent setting and I've married with it... I wouldn't want another to replace it because it is what it is. Now a big ole' RHR... that's different.

And WAY down the line.


And T-gal... ROFLMAO. I'm in agreement with your second response about the brain and mouth. Dazzle, other s them longer.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/15/2009 3:20:23 AM
Author: Gypsy
I hope so. Basically, I wouldn't spend more than 8.5K including the setting and would maximize my stone in a simple and cheap solitaire for now. And play the setting game later.
Honestly, I recently had a scare where I thought I had lost my ring, and I was TOTALLY panicked. And my husband was trying to calm me down as we are both frantically searching for it EVERYWHERE and he makes a joke that... I could get a bigger diamond if I wanted now, as I know more about spread (I have an asscher, pits for spread) and color (F) and clarity (VS1)... etc. And I just did NOT find it funny in the least. The ring is a symbol. Of the two of us and our commitment. When people compliment it, I always say 'My husband did a great job' (Unless it's Psers, then you know... that's different, it's all about specs and stuff then). I don't think it's size or anything about it says anthing than... Hey I was engaged at some point...look down, OH LOOK, I'm married now see the band! NOW that I have it in it's permanent setting and I've married with it... I wouldn't want another to replace it because it is what it is. Now a big ole' RHR... that's different.

And WAY down the line.


And T-gal... ROFLMAO. I'm in agreement with your second response about the brain and mouth. Dazzles them longer.

Ha, true. And my second statement should have read, "is NOT the size of a rock..." as well as "ears", not "years". Perhaps I should take my own advice and go rest my weary brain with some Zzzz's!

ETA, although I daresay many "years" helps with growing what's between the "ears."

 

[dreamofdiamonds]

OK! WOW.............

A lot of opinions about this, I guess I asked for it!

size isnt everything.... I understand now that I''ve read more on PS, cut is the most important thing to me...

I dont know, I feel really greedy for wanting something so expensive.

thanks- but no one really wants to answer my question...

 

[Moh 10]

You wrote, "thanks- but no one really wants to answer my question..."

That reminds me.
Once a little boy told his dad, "Daddy, God didn''t answer my prayer."
His father looked at him lovingly and said, "Son, yes he did answer your prayer. The answer was, No."

Frankly I think we did answer your question.
The answer is there IS no answer, only opinions.

 

[dreamofdiamonds]

Moh,

What I meant by that was my first question: how much was your diamond vs. income?

I can see your point, everyone has their own opinions and its looking like, people would think I''m crazy to spend 20k on a ring.

Thanks

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 7/15/2009 10:06:47 AM
Author: dreamofdiamonds
thanks- but no one really wants to answer my question...

Um, this is a public forum. Where we post pictures of our jewelry which is very easy to estimate "worth" ... do you REALLY expect to tell you what percentage of their INCOME is represented by that ring? Seems pretty brazen & unrealistic if you ask me.

And what we''re trying to tell you is -- it doesn''t matter ANYWAY. You can''t just poll people to try to prove that your request is reasonable. It doesn''t work like that. Whether your request is reasonable or not is subject to YOUR OWN CIRCUMSTANCES ONLY. Even your method of justification betrays your, um, what''s the kind word here .... naivete?

 

[Moh 10]

You wrote, "people would think I'm crazy to spend 20k on a ring."

Don't be overly concerned about what others think of you.
You'll be happier.