im panicking that i wont make it!! lol

[vanderaf]

Date: 6/24/2010 8:12:54 PM
Author: dreamer_d

Date: 6/24/2010 8:07:33 PM
Author: vanderaf
Here''s some helpful advice from a lady who''s husband waited...LOL. Once he had the ring in hand he was a wreck up until he gave it to me (6 months later). He secretly had to go through this pain without me knowing at all because he wanted to wait for our vacation and for the perfect proposal. As soon as he finally did propose on our trip we were so excited that we just wanted to pack up and run home to tell our family so we cut our vacation short to share our news. My poor fiance at the time was wiped out and exhausted from keeping the secret so long! So, if he could have done it all over again he would have proposed before the trip and shared it with our family first so we could have a nice relaxing vacation together and enjoy our engagement. I wish you luck with your decision!

My BIL had a similar story -- he waited a long time to propose and then once they were engaged said, ''We should have done this ages ago!'' Being engaged is so much fun.

That is what we said so we rushed to the alter! LOL...

 

[clgwli]

Date: 6/24/2010 7:13:37 PM
Author: sarap333

Date: 6/24/2010 6:54:56 PM
Author: dreamer_d

Date: 6/24/2010 6:46:21 PM

Author: cluelessguy2010

Are you enegaged now?

Hmmm.....we''re waiting!

This waiting is killing me. I am so excited for him no matter what!

 

[waterlilly]

Date: 6/24/2010 8:07:33 PM
Author: vanderaf
Here's some helpful advice from a lady who's husband waited...LOL. Once he had the ring in hand he was a wreck up until he gave it to me (6 months later). He secretly had to go through this pain without me knowing at all because he wanted to wait for our vacation and for the perfect proposal. As soon as he finally did propose on our trip we were so excited that we just wanted to pack up and run home to tell our family so we cut our vacation short to share our news. My poor fiance at the time was wiped out and exhausted from keeping the secret so long! So, if he could have done it all over again he would have proposed before the trip and shared it with our family first so we could have a nice relaxing vacation together and enjoy our engagement. I wish you luck with your decision!

THIS IS A GREAT STORY!! I hope he reads it (if he hasn't already popped the question!).

You propose on the cruise and the whole purpose of the cruise is out the window! The vacation is exciting enough without piling the engagement on top of it, you know? Propose on a normal, boring week when nothing is happening so the engagement can then become the center of attention - and you are home so you can share with everyone!

 

[jaybx09]

sorry i couldnt post last night..was with my lovely girlfriend.....the funny thing is i originally planned on proposing around thanksgiving, then pushed it up to august for the cruise, now considering pushing it up to early july....lol

 

[tyty333]

July 4th (as mentioned earlier) under the fireworks would be lovely! You would probably catch her off guard because if she is suspecting
anything its probably the cruise. Do it...do it...do it!

 

[missydebby]

I love the 4thof July idea if you could pull it off, cause then every 4th would have you guys dreamily staring into each others eyes for a moment as you remember the proposal...

 

[jaybx09]

you guys are bad....you actually have me considering this! i moved the proposal up 5 months from originally planned if i go for july 4th..lol....i have to figure out if and how i can talk to her dad before then if i decide to do it then

 

[susimoo]

Telephone, letter, email?!?!?

Does telegram still exist?

Doitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoit!!!!

 

[jaybx09]

 

[jaybx09]

i dont even know what to say to her father...eeek! i need to have something planned so i dont stutter..lol

 

[crbl999]

Date: 6/25/2010 10:46:10 AM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i dont even know what to say to her father...eeek! i need to have something planned so i dont stutter..lol

This is what I said, "May I have your daughter''s hand in marriage?" Just keep it simple.

 

[jaybx09]

i know as soon as i say "i want to talk to you about something" hes going to get nervous that something is wrong..lol

 

[tyty333]

"I''d like to ask your daughter to marry me...are you ok with that?"

You dont have to go into how much you love her, how wonderful she is and how honored you''ll be when she says yes

.

P.S. Its ok to be nervous when talking to the Dad. I''m sure that 99% of the guys are even though they know they will get his
blessing.

 

[clgwli]

Date: 6/25/2010 11:03:50 AM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i know as soon as i say ''i want to talk to you about something'' hes going to get nervous that something is wrong..lol

Say something like "I want to talk to you about something that I hope will make you very happy" and then go from there

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/25/2010 11:03:50 AM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i know as soon as i say ''i want to talk to you about something'' hes going to get nervous that something is wrong..lol

Then don''t make it so formal asking to talk, call him up and just say waht crb said!

I think he will not think something is wrong, he will know what is up

 

[Hest88]

You''re so cute!

"Sir, I''m calling because I love your daughter very much, and I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life making her happy. I would be honored if you give your permission to ask your daughter to marry me."

 

[missydebby]

"Yo Pops, your babydoll is single... I like it and I wanna put a ring on it. Cool?" If you are there in person, this is the time you''ll want to show your roboting break dance skills.

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/25/2010 11:35:22 AM
Author: missydebby
''Yo Pops, your babydoll is single... I like it and I wanna put a ring on it. Cool?'' If you are there in person, this is the time you''ll want to show your roboting break dance skills.

hahaha

 

[amc80]

Date: 6/25/2010 11:35:22 AM
Author: missydebby
I like it and I wanna put a ring on it. Cool?

Hahahaha. Awesome.

To help with your decision, another story. A friend of mine has been with her bf since early high school, so like 11 years now. She was obviously getting anxious and wondering if an engagement would ever happen. She finally got engaged on the first night of their trip to Maui, about a month ago. Then, her bf told her he was going to do it six months ago during their last vacation, but he knew she was expecting it. She is relieved and happy to finally be engaged, but really wishes he would have done it six months ago...for a girl who has been waiting 11 years six months is an eternity.

Don''t do it on your vacation, she probably will be expecting it...do it earlier. I''m sure if her options are 1) wait another few months for something "perfect" and 2) get engaged sooner, she would choose option 2.

 

[jaybx09]

do you guys really think she will be expecting it on the cruise? its not like we been together for 10 years...its been a year, so i dont know if she neccessarily thinks its coming..??

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:01:05 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010
do you guys really think she will be expecting it on the cruise? its not like we been together for 10 years...its been a year, so i dont know if she neccessarily thinks its coming..??

I think she will expect it because you will be acting like a wierdo for weeks beforehand

But the expectation is not why we are saying to do it beforehand... there are lots of other reasons.

 

[amc80]

If you have been talking about rings/marriage/engagement/etc., then I would say yes, she will be expecting it. Maybe expecting is too strong of a word, but she will at least be hoping for it. If your goal is to completely catch her off guard, I would do it before the cruise. If your goal is to have the perfect, romantic proposal, well, I would still do it before the cruise

 

[slg47]

OK...so there have been many replies to this already! I think it is so sweet how you can''t wait to give her the ring (I hope my BF has a similar reaction!!! although I am picking out the ring so it is slightly different)

Anyway, the cruise is fun enough that you don''t need to get engaged on the cruise (although that would be nice!), but then what if you needed to get the ring sized, etc.

Honestly I would just pick a day, any day, and plan something (not super elaborate, a walk in the park, or a picnic, or a nice dinner, maybe have some wine and flowers at your place...) and just ask her. She''ll be thrilled!

As far as the parents go, can''t you just call them? And maybe you can call the mom right before, so she won''t have a chance to spill the beans? I''m not sure what her family situation is, but in my family, Mom would be upset if she wasn''t notified. Or maybe you could ask and be sort of vague about it?

I''d also tell your parents too, since you will be asking GF to be a part of their family. But that''s just me!

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:12:53 PM
Author: amc80
If you have been talking about rings/marriage/engagement/etc., then I would say yes, she will be expecting it. Maybe expecting is too strong of a word, but she will at least be hoping for it. If your goal is to completely catch her off guard, I would do it before the cruise. If your goal is to have the perfect, romantic proposal, well, I would still do it before the cruise

so when she said "i dont think you will ask me until some time in 2011" you think that was bull? you think she thinks i will be doing it sooner, and is hoping for it sooner??
we do talk about getting married all the time...this morning she texted me "im 100% ready to marry you" but like i said, we have only been together for a year, so im not sure HOW MUCH she really expects it anytime soon

 

[chicky monkey]

I''m so late to this party...

Don''t do it on the cruise! Go on the cruise as a newly engaged couple. All I would want to do once I got engaged would be to jabber with my friends and family about it and show them the ring. I wouldn''t want to be on a cruise! And if I couldn''t wear my ring on the cruise that you proposed with...ah! The disappointment! I would not be able to wait to get home!

My ideal proposal would be at a location that was special to us in a daily and ordinary way. Do you go to farmer''s markets? Buy her a bouquet and drop down in an impromptu proposal with the flowers and ring. A park you frequent? A coffee shop? Order a coffee or pastry and slip the ring onto the plate and propose. I think it was Dreamer who was proposed to while reading...I love that. I could imagine finding a ring box in a load of laundry! Now THAT''S a story! LOL.

I think the MOST special is to turn the mundane, ordinary, everyday thing that you share together and with a proposal you say, "hey, I want to do this every day with you. Just this regular stuff."

I love that you''re putting so much time, effort and thought into this. You will make a great husband! Take it from a girl who never got a decent proposal.

I''ll be eagerly watching for the news!

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:26:18 PM
Author: slg47
OK...so there have been many replies to this already! I think it is so sweet how you can''t wait to give her the ring (I hope my BF has a similar reaction!!! although I am picking out the ring so it is slightly different)

Anyway, the cruise is fun enough that you don''t need to get engaged on the cruise (although that would be nice!), but then what if you needed to get the ring sized, etc.

Honestly I would just pick a day, any day, and plan something (not super elaborate, a walk in the park, or a picnic, or a nice dinner, maybe have some wine and flowers at your place...) and just ask her. She''ll be thrilled!

As far as the parents go, can''t you just call them? And maybe you can call the mom right before, so she won''t have a chance to spill the beans? I''m not sure what her family situation is, but in my family, Mom would be upset if she wasn''t notified. Or maybe you could ask and be sort of vague about it?

I''d also tell your parents too, since you will be asking GF to be a part of their family. But that''s just me!

what if i only told her dad and not even my parents so that her mom cant be insulted.? or will my parents be annoyed i didnt tell them? ahhhh..so political!

 

[amc80]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:40:23 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010

Date: 6/25/2010 12:12:53 PM

Author: amc80

If you have been talking about rings/marriage/engagement/etc., then I would say yes, she will be expecting it. Maybe expecting is too strong of a word, but she will at least be hoping for it. If your goal is to completely catch her off guard, I would do it before the cruise. If your goal is to have the perfect, romantic proposal, well, I would still do it before the cruise

so when she said ''i dont think you will ask me until some time in 2011'' you think that was bull? you think she thinks i will be doing it sooner, and is hoping for it sooner??

we do talk about getting married all the time...this morning she texted me ''im 100% ready to marry you'' but like i said, we have only been together for a year, so im not sure HOW MUCH she really expects it anytime soon

In my opinion, all girls say something like "I don''t think it will be until next year/years from now/a long time from now" sort of to save face. Nothing would be worse than publicly saying that she thinks it will come sooner, and then have it not happen. It''s sort of like an emotional insurance policy.

And about the parents, just speak to her dad. That''s tradition. Don''t worry about so-and-so''s feelings being hurt. Tradition dictates that you speak to her dad; that''s it. Maybe after it happens you can call ALL the parents on a conference call and tell them all at once.

 

[clgwli]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:40:23 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010

Date: 6/25/2010 12:12:53 PM
Author: amc80
If you have been talking about rings/marriage/engagement/etc., then I would say yes, she will be expecting it. Maybe expecting is too strong of a word, but she will at least be hoping for it. If your goal is to completely catch her off guard, I would do it before the cruise. If your goal is to have the perfect, romantic proposal, well, I would still do it before the cruise

so when she said ''i dont think you will ask me until some time in 2011'' you think that was bull? you think she thinks i will be doing it sooner, and is hoping for it sooner??
we do talk about getting married all the time...this morning she texted me ''im 100% ready to marry you'' but like i said, we have only been together for a year, so im not sure HOW MUCH she really expects it anytime soon

I don''t think it is bull. I think she may be trying to convincer herself of this so she won''t be upset if it doesn''t happen before then.

She''s ready. You''re ready. I see no reason to wait LOL

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:02:13 PM
Author: dreamer_d

Date: 6/25/2010 12:01:05 PM

Author: cluelessguy2010

do you guys really think she will be expecting it on the cruise? its not like we been together for 10 years...its been a year, so i dont know if she neccessarily thinks its coming..??

I think she will expect it because you will be acting like a wierdo for weeks beforehand

Bah-haaahahahhahaha. Yup, exactly.

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/25/2010 12:40:23 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010

Date: 6/25/2010 12:12:53 PM

Author: amc80

If you have been talking about rings/marriage/engagement/etc., then I would say yes, she will be expecting it. Maybe expecting is too strong of a word, but she will at least be hoping for it. If your goal is to completely catch her off guard, I would do it before the cruise. If your goal is to have the perfect, romantic proposal, well, I would still do it before the cruise

so when she said 'i dont think you will ask me until some time in 2011' you think that was bull? you think she thinks i will be doing it sooner, and is hoping for it sooner??
we do talk about getting married all the time...this morning she texted me 'im 100% ready to marry you' but like i said, we have only been together for a year, so im not sure HOW MUCH she really expects it anytime soon

Maybe you're already acting weird and she's letting you know that she's ready and you will get a very happy yes when you ask! If you talk about getting married all the time, believe me, she's expecting -- and hoping for -- a proposal!

Someone in this thread said don't wait, you never know what the future will bring. That is so true. I know how hard it is for guys to be flexible and change plans when they have determined what the "perfect" proposal would be. But, going a little Freudian here, I think you would have waited to order the ring (or paid for the diamond and asked Brian to wait to set it until closer to the cruise -- wasn't that a subject of a previous thread?) if you truly wanted to wait to get engaged. A Freudian would say that by ordering the ring so far in advance of the cruise, that it is your unconscious telling you that you really don't want to wait until the cruise to propose (either that or you're torturing yourself). Boy -- reading what I just wrote, it sounds a little convoluted, and I'd give my students a "C" for writing something like that on an exam, but my point is -- why are you waiting one minute longer than you have to to enjoy the happiness that comes with being an engaged couple?

You need to do this if only so that I can quit obsessively checking this thread for "news"!