im panicking that i wont make it!! lol

[jaybx09]

now that i have the ring im having a hard time knowing i can give it to her anytime i want and i have 2 months.....any one out there have to hold thee ring for long before proposing?? give me some inspiration! im already starting the rationalizing other times i can give it to her, like 4th of july..lol...cruise proposal would be perfect, and thats why i decided i wanted to do that...but now im excited to see her face when i get down on my knee and pull out the box..

 

[stone-cold11]

yap, good luck waiting.

You probably won't make it if you keep looking at the ring.

 

[tyty333]

Dont wait

...I''m an enabler

!

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/24/2010 3:55:28 PM
Author: tyty333
Dont wait

...I''m an enabler

!

lol..i dont want to wait..its just a perfect place..i dont want to regret not waiting just a little longer and doing it somewhere good...hmmmmm, unless i could come up with somehting just as good thats local lol

 

[peonies]

im already starting the rationalizing other times i can give it to her, like 4th of july..

I think that a proposal under fireworks would be pretty perfect too!

 

[clgwli]

What do you usually do for the 4th of July? I know the cruise is an awesome option, but think about it. If you are around loved ones during that time she will be able to share her joy with everyone without having to wait.

Yep I am an enabler too.

Just letting you know that any proposal can be perfect. A cruise is awesome, yes, but any place at any time is perfect too!

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/24/2010 3:57:43 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010

Date: 6/24/2010 3:55:28 PM

Author: tyty333

Dont wait

...I'm an enabler

!

lol..i dont want to wait..its just a perfect place..i dont want to regret not waiting just a little longer and doing it somewhere good...hmmmmm, unless i could come up with somehting just as good thats local lol

Need a rationalization to give the ring to her early? Well, lucky you, you've come to the right place! Here's one way to think about it: You and she have planned the cruise together, right? So the cruise is not a surprise. So if you and she have talked about marriage and agree that marriage would be a good step for the two of you, she's probably already expecting that the proposal will happen on the cruise. I know you've received some advice before that you should propose on the first night of the cruise so she doesn't spend the whole cruise wondering when the proposal will happen. I think the cruise will be a lot more relaxing for both of you if you go as a newly engaged couple who are on the cruise to celebrate their recent engagement...

I'm sure you can think of something wonderful locally. And that way you and your gf will have a day that's special in its own right (and not tied to a big event like a cruise). And she will be truly surprised because she's not expecting a proposal until the cruise.

Did I help you rationalize the decision to give her the ring early?

 

[Dreamer_D]

In my mind, becoming engaged is so important and special on its own it does not need any special time and place and it is also such a fun time in your life that I think it is worth enjoying for an extra 2 months!

So I am not help

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:08:21 PM
Author: sarap333

Date: 6/24/2010 3:57:43 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010

Date: 6/24/2010 3:55:28 PM

Author: tyty333

Dont wait

...I''m an enabler

!

lol..i dont want to wait..its just a perfect place..i dont want to regret not waiting just a little longer and doing it somewhere good...hmmmmm, unless i could come up with somehting just as good thats local lol

Need a rationalization to give the ring to her early? Well, lucky you, you''ve come to the right place! Here''s one way to think about it: You and she have planned the cruise together, right? So the cruise is not a surprise. So if you and she have talked about marriage and agree that marriage would be a good step for the two of you, she''s probably already expecting that the proposal will happen on the cruise. I know you''ve received some advice before that you should propose on the first night of the cruise so she doesn''t spend the whole cruise wondering when the proposal will happen. I think the cruise will be a lot more relaxing for both of you if you go as a newly engaged couple who are on the cruise to celebrate their recent engagement...

I''m sure you can think of something wonderful locally. And that way you and your gf will have a day that''s special in its own right (and not tied to a big event like a cruise). And she will be truly surprised because she''s not expecting a proposal until the cruise.

Did I help you rationalize the decision to give her the ring early?

hmmm..your getting there lol

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:09:28 PM
Author: dreamer_d
In my mind, becoming engaged is so important and special on its own it does not need any special time and place and it is also such a fun time in your life that I think it is worth enjoying for an extra 2 months!


So I am not help

Yes! Yes! A day special in its own right -- like today! Thursday!

 

[melz]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:06:58 PM
Author: peonies

im already starting the rationalizing other times i can give it to her, like 4th of july..

I think that a proposal under fireworks would be pretty perfect too!

I like this idea!

ya, i earlier told you to wait but you know, clgwli''s point that this way she''d be able to share with everyone, and sara''s point that the crusie would be a lovely and relaxing time to celebrate your engagement, both make a lot of sense to me ...

plus i''m afraid if you dont plan something local soon you''ll just drop to your knee at the gas station or walmart or whatever because you won''t be able to wait.

 

[melz]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:10:46 PM
Author: sarap333

Date: 6/24/2010 4:09:28 PM
Author: dreamer_d
In my mind, becoming engaged is so important and special on its own it does not need any special time and place and it is also such a fun time in your life that I think it is worth enjoying for an extra 2 months!


So I am not help

Yes! Yes! A day special in its own right -- like today! Thursday!

 

[jaybx09]

i knew this was going to happen once i got the ring!! i should have waited another month..lol....
well, id have to think of some way to do it local thats memorable..i dont want to give up the cruise idea and do something corny......so i have to think if i could come up with something great...

the other problem is that it gives me less time to figure out when to go behind her back to talk to her father....

lastly , some advice from you guys....
my parents arent together and her parents arent together....her mother has a big mouth and her sister has a big mouth..if her mom knows she will tell her sister and her sister will blow the suprise..guaranteed! ...if i just tell her dad and my parents, will her mother be insulted that she didnt know?? i know her dad is traditional in wanting to know about it..he even made a comment once recently , and i said "dont worry, you will know when its happening" so now i have to tell him..lol

 

[ilovemesomediamonds]

I totally agree with Sara! My FI proposed with a stand-in ring at a moonlight picnic at a favorite park where we often go running together and I was completely surprised because we had a trip to Hawaii planned 3 weeks later (that''s when I suspected he would propose). But his thinking was that he wanted to propose somewhere we would go often and remember that moment, and he was totally right -- I get a little giddy every time I pass that park. The other great thing was we got to bask in our newly engaged status during the Hawaii trip before delving into wedding planning craziness and I got to be totally surprised by his proposal and we got to share the good news with our friends and family live at a BBQ that we already planned for the next day instead of waiting til we were back home from a vacation. So my vote is GO FOR IT!!

 

[ilovemesomediamonds]

Here is how you get around the big mouth parents/sister. Yes, absolutely ask/tell them you are going to propose but do not give ANY details on when. Do NOT let them know you have the ring. They will all likely assume that you will do it on the cruise, you don''t need to correct that impression -- don''t mislead but just don''t given any details. I think from their perspective, it''s not about knowing the details beforehand, but more the respect you have shown them by acknowledging their important role in their daughter''s life.

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:17:14 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i knew this was going to happen once i got the ring!! i should have waited another month..lol....

well, id have to think of some way to do it local thats memorable..i dont want to give up the cruise idea and do something corny......so i have to think if i could come up with something great...


the other problem is that it gives me less time to figure out when to go behind her back to talk to her father....


lastly , some advice from you guys....

my parents arent together and her parents arent together....her mother has a big mouth and her sister has a big mouth..if her mom knows she will tell her sister and her sister will blow the suprise..guaranteed! ...if i just tell her dad and my parents, will her mother be insulted that she didnt know?? i know her dad is traditional in wanting to know about it..he even made a comment once recently , and i said 'dont worry, you will know when its happening' so now i have to tell him..lol

I think tradition says you only need to talk to her father. Yes, her mother may be hurt if she finds out that your parents found out before she did. So I'd suppress the urge to tell your parents, stick with tradition, and set something up privately with her dad -- as close to the actual proposal day as possible to lessen the chance that the news slips out. Families can be horrible about keeping secrets when they are excited about something.

I thought of something else, too -- if you've read any threads on the Ladies in Waiting forum, you know that gf's sometimes find the "hidden" surprise ring -- apparently men aren't too clever in figuring out good hiding places for engagement rings. The longer you wait, the higher the chances your gf may discover the ring. Another reason not to wait!

ETA: If you really feel like you need to tell someone on your side of the family before the proposal, talk to your dad. You know, the man-to-man thing. Then both mothers find out later, not just one mother.

 

[waterlilly]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:17:14 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i knew this was going to happen once i got the ring!! i should have waited another month..lol....

well, id have to think of some way to do it local thats memorable..i dont want to give up the cruise idea and do something corny......so i have to think if i could come up with something great...


the other problem is that it gives me less time to figure out when to go behind her back to talk to her father....


lastly , some advice from you guys....

my parents arent together and her parents arent together....her mother has a big mouth and her sister has a big mouth..if her mom knows she will tell her sister and her sister will blow the suprise..guaranteed! ...if i just tell her dad and my parents, will her mother be insulted that she didnt know?? i know her dad is traditional in wanting to know about it..he even made a comment once recently , and i said ''dont worry, you will know when its happening'' so now i have to tell him..lol

If she''s got a big mouth, nope - don''t tell her and don''t feel the least bit bad for it. This is YOUR DAY, not hers. She''ll get over it. Tell/ask the dad as close to the time as possible to prevent any blabbing and DO IT ALREADY!! I am a BIG fan of NOT waiting once you have the ring. You never know what tomorrow can bring, so just do it!!! It will give her some time to get used to it and not be so freaked out and scared of losing / damaging it on the cruise

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:28:05 PM
Author: waterlilly

Date: 6/24/2010 4:17:14 PM

Author: cluelessguy2010

i knew this was going to happen once i got the ring!! i should have waited another month..lol....


well, id have to think of some way to do it local thats memorable..i dont want to give up the cruise idea and do something corny......so i have to think if i could come up with something great...



the other problem is that it gives me less time to figure out when to go behind her back to talk to her father....



lastly , some advice from you guys....


my parents arent together and her parents arent together....her mother has a big mouth and her sister has a big mouth..if her mom knows she will tell her sister and her sister will blow the suprise..guaranteed! ...if i just tell her dad and my parents, will her mother be insulted that she didnt know?? i know her dad is traditional in wanting to know about it..he even made a comment once recently , and i said ''dont worry, you will know when its happening'' so now i have to tell him..lol

If she''s got a big mouth, nope - don''t tell her and don''t feel the least bit bad for it. This is YOUR DAY, not hers. She''ll get over it. Tell/ask the dad as close to the time as possible to prevent any blabbing and DO IT ALREADY!! I am a BIG fan of NOT waiting once you have the ring. You never know what tomorrow can bring, so just do it!!! It will give her some time to get used to it and not be so freaked out and scared of losing / damaging it on the cruise

Excellent point, Waterlilly!

This thread is great -- so many great rationalizations for giving her the ring early!

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:24:29 PM
Author: sarap333

Date: 6/24/2010 4:17:14 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i knew this was going to happen once i got the ring!! i should have waited another month..lol....

well, id have to think of some way to do it local thats memorable..i dont want to give up the cruise idea and do something corny......so i have to think if i could come up with something great...


the other problem is that it gives me less time to figure out when to go behind her back to talk to her father....


lastly , some advice from you guys....

my parents arent together and her parents arent together....her mother has a big mouth and her sister has a big mouth..if her mom knows she will tell her sister and her sister will blow the suprise..guaranteed! ...if i just tell her dad and my parents, will her mother be insulted that she didnt know?? i know her dad is traditional in wanting to know about it..he even made a comment once recently , and i said ''dont worry, you will know when its happening'' so now i have to tell him..lol

I think tradition says you only need to talk to her father. Yes, her mother may be hurt if she finds out that your parents found out before she did. So I''d suppress the urge to tell your parents, stick with tradition, and set something up privately with her dad -- as close to the actual proposal day as possible to lessen the chance that the news slips out. Families can be horrible about keeping secrets when they are excited about something.

I thought of something else, too -- if you''ve read any threads on the Ladies in Waiting forum, you know that gf''s sometimes find the ''hidden'' surprise ring -- apparently men aren''t too clever in figuring out good hiding places for engagement rings. The longer you wait, the higher the chances your gf may discover the ring. Another reason not to wait!

lol..well i have the ring in a locked safe..and i honestly dont think that shes is expecting me to propose anytime soon....she told me not too long ago that she doesnt think i will ask her until sometime next year, so i think no matter what it will be a suprise..but who knows..you chicks just say things to make it seem like your not expecting it but you are!! why the mind games??

so you think i should not tell my parents or her mother and just her father?

hmm..not a bad idea...

there is this little park not too far from me in this real upper class waterfreont mansion type neighborhood that we take walks in now and then..the park is right on the water with little gazebos and stuff....4th of july me and her will be at her dads for a bbq..i wonder if i spoke to him sometime that day, then after bbq before it got dark out go to the park (we said we would go watch fireworks together so she knows we will be leaving her dads) and do it there?? but shouldnt i bring the ring when i talk to her dad? now i will have the ring on me all day at bbq..that might be a pain, plus id have ot figure out how to get her dad alone when there are 50 people at his house for a bbq.....eek, confusing..maybe i should just wait..this is getting complicated..

 

[waterlilly]

It doesn''t have to be on an eventful day or holiday, etc. Plan a picnic - or plan something else and simply surprise her with a picnic instead. Any scenic areas near you? What are you doing Saturday morning?

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:32:19 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010

Date: 6/24/2010 4:24:29 PM

Author: sarap333

Date: 6/24/2010 4:17:14 PM

Author: cluelessguy2010

i knew this was going to happen once i got the ring!! i should have waited another month..lol....


well, id have to think of some way to do it local thats memorable..i dont want to give up the cruise idea and do something corny......so i have to think if i could come up with something great...



the other problem is that it gives me less time to figure out when to go behind her back to talk to her father....



lastly , some advice from you guys....


my parents arent together and her parents arent together....her mother has a big mouth and her sister has a big mouth..if her mom knows she will tell her sister and her sister will blow the suprise..guaranteed! ...if i just tell her dad and my parents, will her mother be insulted that she didnt know?? i know her dad is traditional in wanting to know about it..he even made a comment once recently , and i said ''dont worry, you will know when its happening'' so now i have to tell him..lol

I think tradition says you only need to talk to her father. Yes, her mother may be hurt if she finds out that your parents found out before she did. So I''d suppress the urge to tell your parents, stick with tradition, and set something up privately with her dad -- as close to the actual proposal day as possible to lessen the chance that the news slips out. Families can be horrible about keeping secrets when they are excited about something.


I thought of something else, too -- if you''ve read any threads on the Ladies in Waiting forum, you know that gf''s sometimes find the ''hidden'' surprise ring -- apparently men aren''t too clever in figuring out good hiding places for engagement rings. The longer you wait, the higher the chances your gf may discover the ring. Another reason not to wait!

lol..well i have the ring in a locked safe..and i honestly dont think that shes is expecting me to propose anytime soon....she told me not too long ago that she doesnt think i will ask her until sometime next year, so i think no matter what it will be a suprise..but who knows..you chicks just say things to make it seem like your not expecting it but you are!! why the mind games??


so you think i should not tell my parents or her mother and just her father?


hmm..not a bad idea...


there is this little park not too far from me in this real upper class waterfreont mansion type neighborhood that we take walks in now and then..the park is right on the water with little gazebos and stuff....4th of july me and her will be at her dads for a bbq..i wonder if i spoke to him sometime that day, then after bbq before it got dark out go to the park (we said we would go watch fireworks together so she knows we will be leaving her dads) and do it there?? but shouldnt i bring the ring when i talk to her dad? now i will have the ring on me all day at bbq..that might be a pain, plus id have ot figure out how to get her dad alone when there are 50 people at his house for a bbq.....eek, confusing..maybe i should just wait..this is getting complicated..

Okay, the safe is a good place -- some guys put the ring box in their sock drawer. Duh! The first place I''d look. How far does her father live from the two of you? Because if he lives close, you could just give him a call and ask to meet with him the day before the BBQ. You don''t have to take the ring along; you can just tell him that you bought the ring and it''s in the safe. BTW, get that ring insured right away!

 

[melz]

i personally dont think you need to show her dad the ring. and you can phone him, or find a quiet moment at the bbq it will only take a minute.

 

[jaybx09]

i got it insured this morning....her dad lives about 30 minutes away..

so you guys are saying dont do it on a holiday? do women find that to ordinary? its better on a random day? if thats the case i will cancel the 4th of july possibility..this weekend is action packed already..

 

[valchiria]

Now I will do the bad girl, the devil of the situation

Your girlfriend has sent you a picture of a ring she likes,according to her preference, you have got the ring.
Now imagine...
The next two weeks she sends you a picture of a ring that she think to prefer,completely different from what you bought...
What do you do?
If you give her the ring achieves her dream and now you stop her dreaming and the possibility that she changes idea about her prefered setting

 

[jaybx09]

you know, you guys/girls were supposed to tell me that i should wait and im dumb not to wait.. this post back fired on me!! lol

 

[jaybx09]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:44:47 PM
Author: valchiria
Now I will do the bad girl, the devil of the situation

Your girlfriend has sent you a picture of a ring she likes,according to her preference, you have got the ring.
Now imagine...
The next two weeks she sends you a picture of a ring that she think to prefer,completely different from what you bought...
What do you do?
If you give her the ring achieves her dream and now you stop her dreaming and the possibility that she changes idea about her prefered setting

im gonna kill you!! know whats funny, ive actually thought about that..lol

 

[bagelboy]

Sorry I am going with the rest, I''m voting to propose earlier than the cruise because of all the good rationales expressed. It is a big day that you will always remember no matter where you propose. She will immediately want to show this off to family and friends. She won''t have that opportunity on board a cruise. You could talk to her father, but if that is very difficult(time or travel) then most fathers will understand. It is tradition, but you can''t always get the moon and all the stars lined up perfectly. The Fourth celebrates many things, all those fireworks exploding is just exactly how you feel inside about her. Now just get a grip, and come up with a good plan!!!

 

[motownmama]

(here''s another) don''t wiat ........... (and don''t tell the mom either - that will blow it).

 

[Lula]

Date: 6/24/2010 4:43:54 PM
Author: cluelessguy2010
i got it insured this morning....her dad lives about 30 minutes away..


so you guys are saying dont do it on a holiday? do women find that to ordinary? its better on a random day? if thats the case i will cancel the 4th of july possibility..this weekend is action packed already..

Okay, good news on the insurance. Would her dad be offended if you told him over the phone the day before or the day of the proposal? Because if it would be difficult to meet with him in person without your gf knowing, a phone call might be a great solution. Then after you talk to him, you could call your dad and say, dad, I just wanted you to know that I asked *insert your gf's name here* father for his blessing to marry his daughter.

And, yes, I think "random day" proposals are very special. I think that the less time you have to carry the ring around in your pocket, the better. Also, the more things going on on the day of the intended proposal, the more chances there are for something unexpected to interfere. 50 people at a BBQ introduces a lot of random error into the process -- what happens if someone at the BBQ wants to go along with you to watch the fireworks? Then you're busted!

So I know a random day doesn't sound as exciting as proposing during a big holiday or on a vacation, but I think you said it best when you wrote that you just want to see the look on her face when you are down on one knee asking her to marry you with the ring. That's what the proposal is all about. And that's what she will remember.

 

[melz]

...