E-Ring Dream to E-Ring Nightmare in the Diamond District

[JDDN]

Can you have your SO (and maybe you can accompany him) go back and ask for the manager and ask how they define "Special Order"? Because what you are describing is not a special order at all. Ask then, what would NOT be special order. If they say...."anything here in the store ready to go, no alterations, etc." then the ring your SO bought is that, hence not specially ordered. I mean if that was a returned ring and the original buyer special ordered it.....well that is very sticky. I mean technically it was special order, but currently if they have it in stock ready to go.....that is not. Semantics!

Also, did your SO bring up that the appraised value was $10K less than what was paid? What's being done about that in the very least? And I thought you said "returns only if appraised less than what paid" or something like that. So then.....doesn't this qualify??

I'm more concerned that they didn't notify him that he was purchasing a special order item that had NO refunds. In common practice.....no one in their right mind would assume that they bought a special order ring if not stated or discussed. I would go back and ask for a manager and discuss these 2 important points before going through your cc, but that's just me.

 

[HappyNewLife]

No wonder. You're a lawyer and trained to look for loopholes when in fact a lot of people just speaking freely and openly and tell a story carelessly. You're one of those lawyers that people love to hate because you will find everything wrong in a picture that's right just to make your case and win, even if it means painting a person wrong and attacking a character just to convince the jury that the witness has a history of lies.

Sure it's your job, but do yourself a favor and don't bring it everywhere you go. You must see the world as a dark place. I feel so sorry for you and your soul.

psst. there is an "ignore" feature on PS

(point your cursor on the person's screen name, click, hit ignore. done)

 

[Allisonfaye]

It honestly surprises me that the ring appraised for less. Usually, they appraise for more. I guess most insurance companies give you a comparable stone as opposed to a check. I made sure that my appraiser didn't inflate my ring's value They tried but it would have cost me significantly more to insure it and they give you a check so I could just go out and get a comparable stone. But the original value was about 90 percent more (per the appraiser) than I paid.

 

[lavieenviolet078]

I'm sorry that this is going on, OP! Don't let this taint your memories of your engagement. While we don't know the contents of your boyfriend's conversation with the jeweler, I know personally I would feel uncomfortable working with a store that did not at least allow the customer to return/exchange unworn merchandise within a reasonable period of time. I think if nothing else this story could be helpful for people out shopping for jewelry to remember to check all invoice/purchase orders/receipts and get return policies in writing before signing .

Is this jeweler refusing a refund or are they refusing to even allow you to exchange for another setting/stone as well?

 

[Hephephippo]

Can you have your SO (and maybe you can accompany him) go back and ask for the manager and ask how they define "Special Order"? Because what you are describing is not a special order at all. Ask then, what would NOT be special order. If they say...."anything here in the store ready to go, no alterations, etc." then the ring your SO bought is that, hence not specially ordered. I mean if that was a returned ring and the original buyer special ordered it.....well that is very sticky. I mean technically it was special order, but currently if they have it in stock ready to go.....that is not. Semantics!

Also, did your SO bring up that the appraised value was $10K less than what was paid? What's being done about that in the very least? And I thought you said "returns only if appraised less than what paid" or something like that. So then.....doesn't this qualify??

I'm more concerned that they didn't notify him that he was purchasing a special order item that had NO refunds. In common practice.....no one in their right mind would assume that they bought a special order ring if not stated or discussed. I would go back and ask for a manager and discuss these 2 important points before going through your cc, but that's just me.

I cannot stress this enough. Yes the invoice states 30day money back guarantee refund on purchases if appraisal is lower than the merchant claims.

They did not honor it. I'm not sure why some souls here still think it's not dishonest?

When appraised value was brought up, they said they won't exchange the rings because they were special order but can exchange the diamond for same carat and stuff but SO has to pay 1k more. LIKE SERIOUSLY WHAT CRAZINESS IS THAT EVEN.

IM a bit overwhelmed right now so I'm sorry if I can't respond or ansrer everything.

 

[kalmen22]

Hi I've been following this thread. Just want to send you a big virtual hug. Breathe. Regroup.

 

[AdaBeta27]

Well, the only lab that assigns a cut grade to a princess is AGS. GIA doesn't. But a 2ct modern round brilliant is a whole lot easier to buy by the numbers. Pricescope has the HCA cut adviser. And the "cheat sheet for rounds" which is described in a thread on here. Fancy shapes have to be evaluated by somebody who can personally inspect the diamond. And then PS usually says "get an ASET" image that indicates how well the diamond reflects light. (Still thinking along the lines of how others on PS wrangled a better diamond when forced to work with the original vendor.)

 

[Hephephippo]

So my SO has now filed for a dispute with the card company and we are hopeful this will be resolved. There are a lot of things in our favor, most especially the clause. The clause never said anything about special order either.

My SO and I had a very good conversation about this and I said I'll own the ring if we don't get our money back/dispute does not resolve in our favor. He refused. It was quite funny really because I was so focused/concerned on the idea of being scammed/duped and see it as a financial loss and I really really really hate being taken advantage of. He sees it too and doesn't like it but he does not like the fact that the ring comes from a dishonest vendor in the first place -- he wants a new ring altogether. I was shocked, he said he can afford another ring and he insists on it. i honestly was shocked and had no idea my SO is more financially blessed than I thought. That was probably why he was comfortable and too trusting just walking in to a jeweler in the DD without detailed research. (I know he has money but didn't know he can be liquid that quickly!!) I told him I still feel really shitty about the financial loss and it hurts me that we lost that money. He however does not see it that way, just a slight financial loss, and that he would rather have a gorgeous ring to start us off...

So having said that, SO is focusing on the dispute and I am focusing on the ring search. I posted a thread about this before and I put that thread on hold while this situation was underway.

If anyone wants to join the fun of finding a ring, please come join me in that thread. I promise to update this thread regarding the further outcome of our dispute and any further response from the merchant.

In the meantime my other thread will come to life and we are looking for almost any ring because really my baseline is best value for money. As long as it looks elegant and timeless, I am not picky/fussy. But I care so much about best value for money. It is weird but people's motivations are different. Instead of picking a cut I like, I picked out cuts I know j won't like (Marquis, oval, and heart). For setting -- half pave is good. Our maximum budget with tax is 35k -- please if you can help us with advice and looking for a ring it will keep my mind off this ordeal for a little while. We were considering going to IDJewelers since you guys highly recommend them here, and we may benefit from an in-person educational discussion. This jewelry thing is the start of a long thing for us -- SO indicated he wants to upgrade the gem too in the future and have milestone/celebratory jewelries. So def important to have a good jewelry education and jeweler relationship.

Thank you again to everyone with kind words and good suggestions. Really appreciate it.

Here is my ring search thread, if anyone is interested to offer up advice or suggestions.. much big hugs and positive energy to kind souls:

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/e-ring-confused-and-dizzy.235967/

 

[Hephephippo]

Hi I've been following this thread. Just want to send you a big virtual hug. Breathe. Regroup.

Thank you. Appreciate the virtual hug. Kind words help calm down the nerves.

 

[Hephephippo]

psst. there is an "ignore" feature on PS

(point your cursor on the person's screen name, click, hit ignore. done)

Thank you dear @HappyNewLife -- you definitely know the secret to happiness! Following your advice

 

[JDDN]

Well, it sounds like you two are coming out of this with a better understanding of what goes into buying expensive jewelry and a nice foundation in your partnership. It's a very sentimental purchase so I understand why he's insisting on a fresh start (ring-wise).

I still think you can come down firmly with the store manager regarding 'special order' especially if they never said it was special order but you should do what you think is the best thing.

All the best to you and your SO!

 

[Hephephippo]

Well, it sounds like you two are coming out of this with a better understanding of what goes into buying expensive jewelry and a nice foundation in your partnership. It's a very sentimental purchase so I understand why he's insisting on a fresh start (ring-wise).

I still think you can come down firmly with the store manager regarding 'special order' especially if they never said it was special order but you should do what you think is the best thing.

All the best to you and your SO!

Thank you. I agree completely and SO will handle it. He doesn't want me stressed over it and he also got his credit cards involved. I'm really happy I have a good guy. That's all that matters. He may have made a mistake but he is my man.

 

[KirstLWA]

I hope you find a quick and beneficial solution. Not a nice situation to start your journey together but don't let it taint it.

Can anyone point us in the direction of a list that shows the PS approved stores in the NYC Diamond District?

 

[Niel]

@alamana has been giving you good information. It’s direct, and it’s not what you want to here, but she appears to be the most knowledgeable about what your options are and are not.
The internet is not your best friend, no one is required to only tell you what you want to hear. You were fishing for unconditional support and unfortunately sometimes when you go fishing you catch a boot.
My advise is to calm down. If the receipt shows you are entitled a refund due to the appraisal then take whatever avenues available and seek one. I would proceed with caution as you very well may not end in a refund and you do not want to burn bridges. I assume you want a new ring and if they have your money and will only offer exchanges- you’ll have to get it there.
To the statement about price. Overpaying is relative. I can but a steal on eBay for 5 k that James Allen might sell for 8k , Kay’s may sell for 15k and a busy store front in a high traffic area with expensive rent might charge 25k. At which point a would I be overpaying?

It appears your husband wandered down the street and said “I wanna pay $30k for a diamond ring” and he did just that.

 

[whitewave]

I hope you find a quick and beneficial solution. Not a nice situation to start your journey together but don't let it taint it.

Can anyone point us in the direction of a list that shows the PS approved stores in the NYC Diamond District?

ID Jewelry is one.

 

[OFY]

I think we need to be on the OP’s side here and stop saying some version of “it’s your own fault”. The vendor may not be wrong from a legal perspective, but it would only be helpful for posters to point that out nicely and with some sympathy. Because from a moral perspective the vendor is definitely all kinds of wrong. And there are so many vendors doing this sort of thing, with customers losing out in the end - I thought fighting this sort of problem in the jewelry world was the reason for creating pricescope in the first place. What to buy, what to look for, who to buy it from...if this was an easy thing to navigate then this forum wouldn’t exist.

This vendor doesn’t deserve to be in business and if there is any way to make them do right by the OP then that’s what we ought to focus on.

 

[Hephephippo]

@alamana has been giving you good information. It’s direct, and it’s not what you want to here, but she appears to be the most knowledgeable about what your options are and are not.
The internet is not your best friend, no one is required to only tell you what you want to hear. You were fishing for unconditional support and unfortunately sometimes when you go fishing you catch a boot.
My advise is to calm down. If the receipt shows you are entitled a refund due to the appraisal then take whatever avenues available and seek one. I would proceed with caution as you very well may not end in a refund and you do not want to burn bridges. I assume you want a new ring and if they have your money and will only offer exchanges- you’ll have to get it there.
To the statement about price. Overpaying is relative. I can but a steal on eBay for 5 k that James Allen might sell for 8k , Kay’s may sell for 15k and a busy store front in a high traffic area with expensive rent might charge 25k. At which point a would I be overpaying?

It appears your husband wandered down the street and said “I wanna pay $30k for a diamond ring” and he did just that.

Not fishing at all. There is a lot of value in messaging -- if anyone wrote well then the message is taken well. No one wants to be accused, judged, etc.

The way you communicate is more important than the message. That is a golden rule.

We are getting a new ring not from this merchant, regardless of our current avenue pursued. We do not want to transact with this merchant at all anymore. They did not stand by their supposed policy, and lied too about claiming special order. Not sure how that will be handled or proven, however SO never had previous interaction nor order so we intend to state that for the record.

Thanks.

 

[whitewave]

The dispute process is going to take two months to play out whether they side with you or not.

Have you thought about getting a store credit and starting over with the same company (I agree, not desirable but it is an option)? Does this vendor have a searchable database?

 

[Hephephippo]

I think we need to be on the OP’s side here and stop saying some version of “it’s your own fault”. The vendor may not be wrong from a legal perspective, but it would only be helpful for posters to point that out nicely and with some sympathy. Because from a moral perspective the vendor is definitely all kinds of wrong. And there are so many vendors doing this sort of thing, with customers losing out in the end - I thought fighting this sort of problem in the jewelry world was the reason for creating pricescope in the first place. What to buy, what to look for, who to buy it from...if this was an easy thing to navigate then this forum wouldn’t exist.

This vendor doesn’t deserve to be in business and if there is any way to make them do right by the OP then that’s what we ought to focus on.

Thanks for being objective and understanding. If anything, I just wish no one goes through this at all and I really want to caution people regarding all of diamond district, except maybe for ID jewelry and any price scope recommended merchant there.

 

[whitewave]

Just saw your reply about starting over regardless....

 

[Niel]

Not fishing at all. There is a lot of value in messaging -- if anyone wrote well then the message is taken well. No one wants to be accused, judged, etc.

The way you communicate is more important than the message. That is a golden rule.

We are getting a new ring not from this merchant, regardless of our current avenue pursued. We do not want to transact with this merchant at all anymore. They did not stand by their supposed policy, and lied too about claiming special order. Not sure how that will be handled or proven, however SO never had previous interaction nor order so we intend to state that for the record.

Thanks.

Do unto others is the golden rule, but I understand you believe people should only communicate in a positive way. That won’t get you far with unsavory vendors like the one in your current pickle.

Just so I’m clear, you have a very real possibility of getting no refund back from this seller. Your plan is to keep the ring anyways,try and sell it used any anywhere from 25-40% what you put into it and then spend money on top of that go get another ring? I hope that’s not the case as that would be an unwise use of 10s of thousands of dollars.

 

[Hephephippo]

The dispute process is going to take two months to play out whether they side with you or not.

Have you thought about getting a store credit and starting over with the same company (I agree, not desirable but it is an option)? Does this vendor have a searchable database?

Just saw your reply about starting over regardless....

No worries. SO actually asked for an exchange too, as part of their exchange policy however they will only exchange for similar carat stones, and not change the bands (we don't mind the bands) from a certain selection and want us to pay an extra $1k to change the stone.

Now that was never in any clause or receipt that we need to pay 1k for changing stones after it is appraised at a lower value!!! I really am perplexed why some can't see that this merchant practices bad business !

 

[Hephephippo]

Do unto others is the golden rule, but I understand you believe people should only communicate in a positive way. That won’t get you far with unsavory vendors like the one in your current pickle.

Just so I’m clear, you have a very real possibility of getting no refund back from this seller. Your plan is to keep the ring anyways,try and sell it used any anywhere from 25-40% what you put into it and then spend money on top of that go get another ring? I hope that’s not the case as that would be an unwise use of 10s of thousands of dollars.

My SO has decided he wants a new ring for us. It may be financially unwise (which makes me feel sick everytime I think of the money lost), but he doesn't want this ring altogether nor to deal with the merchant at all after they did not meet their word and their written clause.

Whether my SO will sell the rings or not is up to him. I first offered and insisted to keep it but he does not want to. If he doesn't sell then I may just change the ring into a necklace and maybe wear the bands on other fingers like one of those decked out rappers!!

 

[Niel]

No worries. SO actually asked for an exchange too, as part of their exchange policy however they will only exchange for similar carat stones, and not change the bands (we don't mind the bands) from a certain selection and want us to pay an extra $1k to change the stone.

Now that was never in any clause or receipt that we need to pay 1k for changing stones after it is appraised at a lower value!!! I really am perplexed why some can't see that this merchant practices bad business !

Everyone can see the vendor is unscrupulous, however were not all quick to blame your circumstances entirely on illegal behavior on the part of the seller.

 

[Niel]

My SO has decided he wants a new ring for us. It may be financially unwise (which makes me feel sick everytime I think of the money lost), but he doesn't want this ring altogether nor to deal with the merchant at all after they did not meet their word and their written clause.

Whether my SO will sell the rings or not is up to him. I first offered and insisted to keep it but he does not want to. If he doesn't sell then I may just change the ring into a necklace and maybe wear the bands on other fingers like one of those decked out rappers!!

It seems like both you and your SO are making decisions emotionally. $30k is too much money to do that with, particularly when it’s out on credit. Please consider taking some time to consider what’s best for your situations rationally.

 

[OFY]

It seems like both you and your SO are making decisions emotionally. $30k is too much money to do that with, particularly when it’s out on credit. Please consider taking some time to consider what’s best for your situations rationally.

I thought she said he had this type of funds liquid?

 

[Niel]

I thought she said he had this type of funds liquid?

If I misread I apologize but the sentiment is the same, think logically about your next steps before throwing more money down the drain. I was basing it off he statement that her SO split this payment over Amex and Chase, earlier in the posting.

 

[Hephephippo]

If I misread I apologize but the sentiment is the same, think logically about your next steps before throwing more money down the drain.

I fully agree with you both @OFY and @Niel And I did insist to my SO we can just keep the ring. Our finances matter more to me than a ring, regardless that it is liquid and not credit.

Would you have any advice how I can communicate this to my SO? Or a middle ground so he is also still happy?

 

[Niel]

I fully agree with you both @OFY and @Niel And I did insist to my SO we can just keep the ring. Our finances matter more to me than a ring, regardless that it is liquid and not credit.

Would you have any advice how I can communicate this to my SO? Or a middle ground so he is also still happy?

If a refund can not be accomplished and do not want to pay to get a different ring you will like I suggest selling both the setting and the band (don’t expect to get much that’s just the nature of these things) and reset the stone in your favorite setting of all settings. You’d be amazing how bad juju can come right off in a new setting. Wait to buy a wedding band until you are closer to the date when the stink of this transaction wears off.

 

[Hephephippo]

If a refund can not be accomplished and do not want to pay to get a different ring you will like I suggest selling both the setting and the band (don’t expect to get much that’s just the nature of these things) and reset the stone in your favorite setting of all settings. You’d be amazing how bad juju can come right off in a new setting. Wait to buy a wedding band until you are closer to the date when the stink of this transaction wears off.

What a great suggestion!!! I hope hope hope my SO agrees to this instead and puts the new budget he gave me into my bank account or our wedding instead!!! Thank you for this wonderful idea!