Can you help me compare these two antique cushions??? ERD and GOG

[missydebby]

Date: 5/25/2010 4:10:51 AM

I am a woman and I am highly critical and analytical. Perhaps even too much ...


MissyDebby - Are you familiar with Myers Briggs? I am a ENTJ and ENTF - it appears I am ENTJ at work and ENTF in my personal life.

Yes. It was incredibly important in my field of sales (financial products). I am straight up Expressive and my DH is a very Analytical computer programmer. So communication twixt the two is totally possible. Sometimes, when we''re going someplace I''ll ask "Are we about 3 miles away?" And he replies "No, only about 2.7"

Anyhow, very basically as far as information is concerned, Drivers want the bottom line, Analyticals want the evidence, Expressives want to make a relationship, and Amiables want you walk them through the process. And nothing drives a Driver more crazy than withholding the bottom line info and instead trying to hold his hand, and nothing drives an Analytical more crazy than lots of small talk without facts. If you give the Expressive only facts and don''t want to be friends, they will fall asleep during your presentation. If you try to bottom line an Amiable, they''ll feel pressured and run away scared to do business with you.

NONE of this has to do with gender.

But I ain''t mad at choo, CCL

You just analyzed based on evidence you thought was true. And in your experience, it seems it''s a woman thing to fall in love with the pretty stone and disregard the evidence. I sometimes feel like Analyticals fall in love with the evidence and disregard the stone

 

[ChunkyCushionLover]

Date: 5/25/2010 1:46:48 AM
Author: dreamer_d

Date: 5/25/2010 12:07:45 AM
Author: ChunkyCushionLover

My wife also loves her diamond and would never let me trade or upgrade it. She loves it not because it is the most beautiful diamond but because I gave it to her. This is a major reason why I find that opinions given by some women in this forum are not as critical or analytic as I would like. Diamonds are inherently beautiful so its far too easy I think for women to 'fall in love' with their diamonds and ignore the flaws. This 'falling in love' can often result in weak and often misleading advice to those trying to make a more rational and calculated decision. However to the wearer of the diamond it is perfect and there is no need to rethink a decisions or to replace it no matter what other choices are available.

CCL while your point is a good one re: emotional aspects of diamonds, and a sentiment with which I wholeheartedly agree, I must take issue with the sweeping statement about the 'opinions given by some women in this forum' being 'not as critical or analytic' as you would like. I think you can easily make that statement without reference to gender. Your observation about thel link between gender and diamond irrationality is an illusory correlation: Apart from the people in the trade, and maybe 5 regular consumer posters, *all* of the regular posters in RT are women. Therefore, it makes complete sense that if you sample the comments of PSers and find some percentage -- let's say 20% -- to be too emotional, then those comments will come from women most of the time. As do most of the highly rational comments, by the same measure of probability

.

I agree with you gender should be irrelevant, but those type of comments are most often made by the wearer which happens to be 99.9% of the time women.
We do have a few cases where men post here and blindly defend their purchase so that everyone can know what a smart decision they made, but the comments have a different nature, they aren't usually in love with the diamond they gave their wife, only in love with their wife

.

Wow only ~5 male high post count consumer posters, that really opens my eyes

.

 

[Cehrabehra]

debby - the last line in your post made me nod and laugh at the same time!

 

[ChunkyCushionLover]

Date: 5/25/2010 9:34:34 AM
Author: missydebby

Date: 5/25/2010 4:10:51 AM

I am a woman and I am highly critical and analytical. Perhaps even too much ...


MissyDebby - Are you familiar with Myers Briggs? I am a ENTJ and ENTF - it appears I am ENTJ at work and ENTF in my personal life.

Yes. It was incredibly important in my field of sales (financial products). I am straight up Expressive and my DH is a very Analytical computer programmer. So communication twixt the two is totally possible. Sometimes, when we''re going someplace I''ll ask ''Are we about 3 miles away?'' And he replies ''No, only about 2.7''

Anyhow, very basically as far as information is concerned, Drivers want the bottom line, Analyticals want the evidence, Expressives want to make a relationship, and Amiables want you walk them through the process. And nothing drives a Driver more crazy than withholding the bottom line info and instead trying to hold his hand, and nothing drives an Analytical more crazy than lots of small talk without facts. If you give the Expressive only facts and don''t want to be friends, they will fall asleep during your presentation. If you try to bottom line an Amiable, they''ll feel pressured and run away scared to do business with you.

NONE of this has to do with gender.

But I ain''t mad at choo, CCL

You just analyzed based on evidence you thought was true. And in your experience, it seems it''s a woman thing to fall in love with the pretty stone and disregard the evidence. I sometimes feel like Analyticals fall in love with the evidence and disregard the stone

Great post and having both types here is a plus. I have had the pleasure of working with a few top criminal lawyers as a student, as I assisted them in preparing for trials. I was taught the analytical only approach or too much focus on minute details can really hurt arguments at trial. These great lawyers were both expressive and analytical and knew how to summarize a lot of information and only present what is most important so the message had the most impact.

Karl K and Kenny do this effectively in the PS forums, I wish I could write shorthand and still get all the points across effectively, it is not an easy task.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 5/25/2010 9:40:41 AM
Author: ChunkyCushionLover

Date: 5/25/2010 1:46:48 AM
Author: dreamer_d

Date: 5/25/2010 12:07:45 AM
Author: ChunkyCushionLover

My wife also loves her diamond and would never let me trade or upgrade it. She loves it not because it is the most beautiful diamond but because I gave it to her. This is a major reason why I find that opinions given by some women in this forum are not as critical or analytic as I would like. Diamonds are inherently beautiful so its far too easy I think for women to ''fall in love'' with their diamonds and ignore the flaws. This ''falling in love'' can often result in weak and often misleading advice to those trying to make a more rational and calculated decision. However to the wearer of the diamond it is perfect and there is no need to rethink a decisions or to replace it no matter what other choices are available.

CCL while your point is a good one re: emotional aspects of diamonds, and a sentiment with which I wholeheartedly agree, I must take issue with the sweeping statement about the ''opinions given by some women in this forum'' being ''not as critical or analytic'' as you would like. I think you can easily make that statement without reference to gender. Your observation about thel link between gender and diamond irrationality is an illusory correlation: Apart from the people in the trade, and maybe 5 regular consumer posters, *all* of the regular posters in RT are women. Therefore, it makes complete sense that if you sample the comments of PSers and find some percentage -- let''s say 20% -- to be too emotional, then those comments will come from women most of the time. As do most of the highly rational comments, by the same measure of probability

.

I agree with you gender should be irrelevant, but those type of comments are most often made by the wearer which happens to be 99.9% of the time women.
We do have a few cases where men post here and blindly defend their purchase so that everyone can know what a smart decision they made, but the comments have a different nature, they aren''t usually in love with the diamond they gave their wife, only in love with their wife

.

Wow only ~5 male high post count consumer posters, that really opens my eyes

.

Lets not confuse the gender *roles* of buying versus wearing and receiving with the genders themselves. And irrationality takes many forms, you cite but one example. I also find it irrational when posters indicate a a blind refusal to listen to anyone who might have an opinion that differs from their own when it comes to cut. Somehow it seems to me that those types of irrational comments tend to come from men and are just as irksome

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 5/25/2010 9:40:41 AM
Author: ChunkyCushionLover

Date: 5/25/2010 1:46:48 AM
Author: dreamer_d

Date: 5/25/2010 12:07:45 AM
Author: ChunkyCushionLover

My wife also loves her diamond and would never let me trade or upgrade it. She loves it not because it is the most beautiful diamond but because I gave it to her. This is a major reason why I find that opinions given by some women in this forum are not as critical or analytic as I would like. Diamonds are inherently beautiful so its far too easy I think for women to ''fall in love'' with their diamonds and ignore the flaws. This ''falling in love'' can often result in weak and often misleading advice to those trying to make a more rational and calculated decision. However to the wearer of the diamond it is perfect and there is no need to rethink a decisions or to replace it no matter what other choices are available.

CCL while your point is a good one re: emotional aspects of diamonds, and a sentiment with which I wholeheartedly agree, I must take issue with the sweeping statement about the ''opinions given by some women in this forum'' being ''not as critical or analytic'' as you would like. I think you can easily make that statement without reference to gender. Your observation about thel link between gender and diamond irrationality is an illusory correlation: Apart from the people in the trade, and maybe 5 regular consumer posters, *all* of the regular posters in RT are women. Therefore, it makes complete sense that if you sample the comments of PSers and find some percentage -- let''s say 20% -- to be too emotional, then those comments will come from women most of the time. As do most of the highly rational comments, by the same measure of probability

.

I agree with you gender should be irrelevant, but those type of comments are most often made by the wearer which happens to be 99.9% of the time women.
We do have a few cases where men post here and blindly defend their purchase so that everyone can know what a smart decision they made, but the comments have a different nature, they aren''t usually in love with the diamond they gave their wife, only in love with their wife

.

Wow only ~5 male high post count consumer posters, that really opens my eyes

.

Lets not confuse the gender *roles* of buying versus wearing and receiving with the genders themselves. And irrationality takes many forms, you cite but one example. I also find it irrational when posters indicate a a blind refusal to listen to anyone who might have an opinion that differs from their own when it comes to cut. Somehow it seems to me that those types of irrational comments tend to come from men and are just as irksome

 

[missydebby]

Date: 5/25/2010 10:05:24 AM

Great post and having both types here is a plus. I have had the pleasure of working with a few top criminal lawyers as a student, as I assisted them in preparing for trials. I was taught the analytical only approach or too much focus on minute details can really hurt arguments at trial. These great lawyers were both expressive and analytical and knew how to summarize a lot of information and only present what is most important so the message had the most impact.


Karl K and Kenny do this effectively in the PS forums, I wish I could write shorthand and still get all the points across effectively, it is not an easy task.

True. What always happens is that we give information and make our cases based on the way WE ourselves like to get and process information. Great salespeople, or people in jobs where they have to sell a story - like attorneys - are extremely good at figuring out who their audience is and then selling to them the way the audience likes to be sold. So for instance CCL, if you were trying to get me (Expressive) to understand where you''re coming from, you might befriend me first, ie "MissyDebby, I totally see where you''re coming from and that it''s important for you to have a good relationship with your seller. I understand you want your cushion to have a unique character. Let me share with you a few hard facts that may help you determine those traits during your decision making process..." Then you can go to Analytical town, just making sure every once in a while that I haven''t fallen asleep. If you don''t know who your audience is, or if it''s possibly made up of many different types, make sure you add a little of it all in...

OP Question: Help me choose between this ERD diamond and an AVC

Response: (Find out who you''re talking to) There are lots of different criteria that may help you. Tell me, what''s more important for you- specific character and faceting in your diamond (Expressive)or do you want the cold hard facts about light return (Analytical). Does it just come down to price per carat/cut/color and it doesn''t really matter who the reputable vendor is (Driver) or do you want a vendor who can walk you through the process (Amiable)?

And you don''t have to do any of this. You have to decide: it is more important to tell what you know or that someone understands what you mean.

 

[ccb0x45]

Sorry to rise this thread from the dead, but the ring is done and finished and I have posted pictures for anyone curious:

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/old-mine-from-mark-t-and-singlestone-custom-setting.145810/