Where's a chap supposed to start?

[Rogueish]

Does your girlfriend have Pinterest or something you could take a peek at to see if she's pinned any rings she likes? Perhaps that could be a place to start looking for some clues/parameters for the engagement ring!

No Pinterest but we have discussed it and I feel fairly confident in the Pave/Nova style setting, is the choice of metal just one of desire or does it also affect durability? All of her jewelry is silver (by her preference), I'm curious why no engagement rings are but it's not a big deal.

If she wears all silver jewelry would white gold or platinum be a better match in coloring? Does it matter? Is one more hard wearing than the other? My mother always favored 9 carat gold over 22 or 24 because it was more durable for example.

 

[cinnamonstick]

It's a personal preference on gold color /metal. However if she wears silver all the time (as I do) I would bet for sure WG or plat. Should ask....but seems logical she would not want YG.

Oh....no 9k. Maybe stronger (IDK) but 14k is strong enough. I prefer 18k by far in yellow gold. I think 18k is not as strong but I appreciate the yellower color. I believe there's no visual difference between 14 & 18 white gold. Jewelers have always told me to go with the 14k in WG because no color varience, cheeper, and stronger. Somebody else would need to verify this statement.

As far as platinum goes, I purchased my first piece of platinum a few weeks ago. Can't comment on how it wears. I believe it developes more of a patina vs white gold and there is a slight color difference. No need to replate plat. but I hardly need to replate my WG. I read platinum is a little bit stronger and it displaces vs wears way. Cost more bit think prices are down. You can read tons of information online or Pricescope WG vs platinum. Tons. Lots of convo on this topic.

 

[Niel]

It's a personal preference on gold color /metal. However if she wears silver all the time (as I do) I would bet for sure WG or plat. Should ask....but seems logical she would not want YG.

Oh....no 9k. Maybe stronger (IDK) but 14k is strong enough. I prefer 18k by far in yellow gold. I think 18k is not as strong but I appreciate the yellower color. I believe there's no visual difference between 14 & 18 white gold. Jewelers have always told me to go with the 14k in WG because no color varience, cheeper, and stronger. Somebody else would need to verify this statement.

As far as platinum goes, I purchased my first piece of platinum a few weeks ago. Can't comment on how it wears. I believe it developes more of a patina vs white gold and there is a slight color difference. No need to replate plat. but I hardly need to replate my WG. I read platinum is a little bit stronger and it displaces vs wears way. Cost more bit think prices are down. You can read tons of information online or Pricescope WG vs platinum. Tons. Lots of convo on this topic.

There is a visible difference between 14k and 18k gold. The difference is white gold is almost always rhodium plated. If you coved the gold up with rhodium, then sure it looks the same. But rhodium doesn't stay, and when it fades 18k will typically be less white.


Op, what ring size is your girlfriend?

 

[Rogueish]

Op, what ring size is your girlfriend?

7.5 I do believe.

 

[cinnamonstick]

Makes sense Niel. Thank you for the clarification on 14k vs 18k WG.

 

[Snowdrop13]

Does the ring have to be a "surprise"? It sounds like the lady has given you some ideas to work with but also that she doesn't really know what size of diamond etc that she would like. Often the best thing is to go into a shop together and try rings on. She may find what suits her hand is not the same as what she thought might. From personal experience, I had expected to want a solitaire but decided a 3 stone design was much more flattering. Will she wear the ring every day? Will it fit with her work situation and lifestyle? Sorry, I know I'm adding to the questions rather than solving any!

 

[Niel]

Op, what ring size is your girlfriend?

7.5 I do believe.

Ok,with that I'll say, I think you should get a round (unless she is open to a halo), and I think you should try and get as large a diamond as you can afford.

7.5 isn't huge, but it isn't small.... And the perception of size is dependant on the ring size. Like food on a plate, the smaller the area, the larger the item on top of it looks.

If you can also get platinum I would.

How does she feel about halos?

 

[Rogueish]

Does the ring have to be a "surprise"? It sounds like the lady has given you some ideas to work with but also that she doesn't really know what size of diamond etc that she would like. Often the best thing is to go into a shop together and try rings on. She may find what suits her hand is not the same as what she thought might. From personal experience, I had expected to want a solitaire but decided a 3 stone design was much more flattering. Will she wear the ring every day? Will it fit with her work situation and lifestyle? Sorry, I know I'm adding to the questions rather than solving any!

I very much appreciate questions, it makes me think! We have browsed together online and in store, I think I know the setting but the size, color and clarity are what I'm really not sure about. Clearly one can tell what is best or better but I debate what is appropriate, often in simple terms such as whether extra thousands should go toward a house deposit or on a ring. I don't want to go cheap but don't want to go ridiculous either. She would wear it every day, I'd expect it to never leave her finger other than maybe for showering or cleaning or whatever, she works in a professional position so no specific need not to wear it.

My big debate is if the wearer or an observer can actually tell the difference between say an E and an H or a WS1 and a VS2 as those choices start to determine the size, obviously a larger stone is more affordable in a lower color/clarity.

Maybe my question to ring owners rather than specialists is if someone showed you their new ring what is impressive? Do you think "Oh, that looks like an H" or "Oh my, look at the size of that!"? Is a .75 carat VS1 E noticeably nicer than a 1.2 carat SI1 G for example? Should I focus on carat weight and cut? On color and clarity? Middle of the range on each and so on?

Even if I settled on an amount to spend I feel all the same questions come in to play.

 

[Rogueish]

Op, what ring size is your girlfriend?

7.5 I do believe.

Ok,with that I'll say, I think you should get a round (unless she is open to a halo), and I think you should try and get as large a diamond as you can afford.

7.5 isn't huge, but it isn't small.... And the perception of size is dependant on the ring size. Like food on a plate, the smaller the area, the larger the item on top of it looks.

If you can also get platinum I would.

How does she feel about halos?

I think originally she liked the idea of a halo but once we looked at a few we both agree we prefer a single central stone, hence the pave/solitaire or whatever the proper name is. All of the mounts suggested (Novo style) align well with what I'm looking for. In looking at them the bigger question is the stones in the band and if they are visible/exposed at the side, we like that rather than inset.

As large as I can afford... there's the $64,000 question, go larger and sacrifice color/clarity or as large as I can afford but within a specific range...?!

 

[Niel]

Does the ring have to be a "surprise"? It sounds like the lady has given you some ideas to work with but also that she doesn't really know what size of diamond etc that she would like. Often the best thing is to go into a shop together and try rings on. She may find what suits her hand is not the same as what she thought might. From personal experience, I had expected to want a solitaire but decided a 3 stone design was much more flattering. Will she wear the ring every day? Will it fit with her work situation and lifestyle? Sorry, I know I'm adding to the questions rather than solving any!

I very much appreciate questions, it makes me think! We have browsed together online and in store, I think I know the setting but the size, color and clarity are what I'm really not sure about. Clearly one can tell what is best or better but I debate what is appropriate, often in simple terms such as whether extra thousands should go toward a house deposit or on a ring. I don't want to go cheap but don't want to go ridiculous either. She would wear it every day, I'd expect it to never leave her finger other than maybe for showering or cleaning or whatever, she works in a professional position so no specific need not to wear it.

My big debate is if the wearer or an observer can actually tell the difference between say an E and an H or a WS1 and a VS2 as those choices start to determine the size, obviously a larger stone is more affordable in a lower color/clarity.

Maybe my question to ring owners rather than specialists is if someone showed you their new ring what is impressive? Do you think "Oh, that looks like an H" or "Oh my, look at the size of that!"? Is a .75 carat VS1 E noticeably nicer than a 1.2 carat SI1 G for example? Should I focus on carat weight and cut? On color and clarity? Middle of the range on each and so on?

Even if I settled on an amount to spend I feel all the same questions come in to play.

There's a term called " eye clean" we throw around here. That means, you cannot see inclusions when you look at it on your hand.

You can find wye clean stones down to the SI level. If you're concern is what people will be able to SEE, shop for eye clean stones, rather than getting stuck on what the clarity grade is.

She isn't wearing the certificate on her fingers, so if you're looking to save a bit, consider that. If you can't see ethe inclusion for a vvs2 or a si1.....then ON THE HAND they look the same , kwim?

This is different than MIND CLEAN. some people, though they know full well they may not be able to see the inclusions, still want a higher clarity.

I take the stance that I don't want to pay for something I cannot see. If I cannot SEE the difference between a si1 and a vvs1.... Then I do not want to pay for it

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

You have to make that choice, what is most important to you? Go see some stones in person, you need to be comfortable with your choice and how you spend your money. Do yourself a favor and only view GIA or AGS certed stones to get a proper idea what what ratings mean (especially cut and color).

 

[Niel]

Op, what ring size is your girlfriend?

7.5 I do believe.

Ok,with that I'll say, I think you should get a round (unless she is open to a halo), and I think you should try and get as large a diamond as you can afford.

7.5 isn't huge, but it isn't small.... And the perception of size is dependant on the ring size. Like food on a plate, the smaller the area, the larger the item on top of it looks.

If you can also get platinum I would.

How does she feel about halos?

I think originally she liked the idea of a halo but once we looked at a few we both agree we prefer a single central stone, hence the pave/solitaire or whatever the proper name is. All of the mounts suggested (Novo style) align well with what I'm looking for. In looking at them the bigger question is the stones in the band and if they are visible/exposed at the side, we like that rather than inset.

As large as I can afford... there's the $64,000 question, go larger and sacrifice color/clarity or as large as I can afford but within a specific range...?!

I think you should go with platinum, as you're buying online and I don't think you want to worry about repairs or redipping.

With that in mind I think you don't want to go any lower than an I in color... And probably best to stay in the H or higher (I if you can really get something good!) And clarity I think just get one that's eye clean.

 

[Rogueish]

I feel the target is coming in to view, I think where I am is a round diamond, H or higher color and eye clean (is that something I can search on?!). Within those parameters I can then look at price/size combinations to tip-toe toward a decision, I think.

It seems on the sites such as white flash there is a rating for the cut, how crucial is that? That site also confuses me a little as there are "in house" and "virtual" diamonds, I assume that means I'd have more confidence in an "in house" as they have reviewed and rated it, are the "virtual" ones a gamble? Of lesser quality?

 

[Niel]

I like this setting

6 prong
http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/engagement-rings/pave-and-side-stones/legera-pave-six-prong-platinum-6649p

Or 4 prong
http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/engagement-rings/pave-and-side-stones/legera-pave-platinum-5861p

 

[Niel]

I feel the target is coming in to view, I think where I am is a round diamond, H or higher color and eye clean (is that something I can search on?!). Within those parameters I can then look at price/size combinations to tip-toe toward a decision, I think.

It seems on the sites such as white flash there is a rating for the cut, how crucial is that? That site also confuses me a little as there are "in house" and "virtual" diamonds, I assume that means I'd have more confidence in an "in house" as they have reviewed and rated it, are the "virtual" ones a gamble? Of lesser quality?

If where going to ship for eye clean (which I do think is a good idea) we want to shop at places that will tell you that. That's whiteflash, James Allen, good old gold, Brian Gavin... among some other places I'm sure I'm not thinking of now.

I like those Brian Gavin settings I just posted as they are under 2k for a platinum pave setting like you're after

 

[Rogueish]

I like those Brian Gavin settings I just posted as they are under 2k for a platinum pave setting like you're after

I like them too, thank you. Would you hazard a guess at what weight the stone is in the pictures?

 

[Rogueish]

How would i search for "eye clean" on say white flash?

 

[Niel]

I like those Brian Gavin settings I just posted as they are under 2k for a platinum pave setting like you're after

I like them too, thank you. Would you hazard a guess at what weight the stone is in the pictures?

Oh gosh.... The 4 prong? Maybe a 1ct princess? The 6 prong looks to be maybe a 1.5-2 ct round. I have no idea. So hard to gauge when you don't know the finger size.

You can get a 1-1.15 ct stone with that setting in platinum for under 10k... And that's just a round. They have nice princesses and cushions too


You can't search. But when you click on the stone to the left there is a rectangle with icons. They say things like "aca" "eye clean" "in house" next to them. If the eye clean icon is there, they feel its eye clean to their standards

 

[Niel]

If you wanted to stay within the 8-8.5k mark, here are my choices depending if you wanted a round, princess, or cushion.

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.030-h-si1-cushion-diamond-ags-104083556011

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.187-h-vs1-princess-diamond-ags-104075727006

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/0.980-h-si1-round-diamond-ags-104083953003

 

[Niel]

My last choice, if you're willing to spend a bit more (still under 10k) would be this

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.155-h-si1-round-diamond-ags-bl-104083953019

 

[Niel]

If you wanted to stay within the 8-8.5k mark, here are my choices depending if you wanted a round, princess, or cushion.

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.030-h-si1-cushion-diamond-ags-104083556011

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/1.187-h-vs1-princess-diamond-ags-104075727006

http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/diamonds/diamond-details/0.980-h-si1-round-diamond-ags-104083953003

Here is what (approximately) they would look like on a 7.5 size finger. Notice how the princess is pretty much equal to the round, even though it's larger. So same price, same face up size, more ct. That way, if she cares about ctw, then that's something to consider.

 

[Rogueish]

I'm thinking round or cushion, I like Princess but those sharp corners, I just don't know. I suspect I'll end up with a round but we'll see.

It looks as though a 1.2 carat Princess is smaller (width and height) than a 1.0 carat round but obviously being square there's maybe similar surface area. Between a cushion, round and princess is one thought to be more "sparkly" than the others?

 

[Rogueish]

Thanks Niel, that's awesome, a great comparison.

 

[Niel]

I'm thinking round or cushion, I like Princess but those sharp corners, I just don't know. I suspect I'll end up with a round but we'll see.

It looks as though a 1.2 carat Princess is smaller (width and height) than a 1.0 carat round but obviously being square there's maybe similar surface area. Between a cushion, round and princess is one thought to be more "sparkly" than the others?

A princess I think is also in its waning years of popularity. So if she wants it, go for it, but not unless she specifically stated she wants one would I get one. But you had it in your list, so I included it.

A round is said to be sparkiest. But all three of those stones are graded ideal light performance (I'm 99% sure, but I cannot pull up their certs on my computer to confirm so you can double check) so all of those will be very sparkly.

A cushion in my mind is the new princess. The princess was the new marquise. What I mean by that is, they are very popular and after their time in the spot light I think you will notice people will tire of them. It took marquise 30 years to get out of that "obviously 80s " look. And princesses have the "obviously 2003" look, and I fear cushions will have a "obviously 2010" look. Eta: this is jewelry fashion overall. This does not mean your girlfriend will necessarily tire of if, but I'm talking jewelry trends in general

Rounds don't have that same problem. Less unique though. It's all a trade off

 

[LLJsmom]

How would i search for "eye clean" on say white flash?

When you click on a particular stone, if the Whiteflash in-house team has determined it is eye clean, there will be the words "EYE CLEAN" on the top of the page to the right of the picture of the stone. It will be next to the words "AGS CERTIFIED".

WF will provide this information for their "A CUT ABOVE" AND "EXPERT SELECTION" stones. "A CUT ABOVE" AND "EXPERT SELECTION" stones are stones they have in-house, or on their premises. They can grab the stone and examine it and answer any questions. I've called WF and ask them to compare two in-house stones. You could even ask them how eye clean a stone is. I'm super anal and have asked if it's eye clean up to 5 inches, or whatever. (Am I also very near-sighted which makes eye clean more of a challenge for me.)

With VIRTUAL SELECTION stones, these are usually not in-house. They can access the stone, but they do not have it on the premises. I an not sure if they can determine if an SI1 is eye clean. You should call and ask them. WF is super easy to talk to. Same goes for Brian Gavin Diamonds. You can call them, tell them what you're looking for, for example, a G-H stone, VS1 or VS2. Eye-clean. Tell them your budget. You can also ask about the setting. How high does the diamond sit in this setting versus this other setting. They offer great customer service so why not take advantage of it? They will email you suggestions and work with you through the process.

You should also be aware of upgrade policies. Even if you think you will NEVER need it, never say never. WF and BGD policies are slightly different. Click on their website and read it for yourself. If you have ANY questions and need clarification, CALL THEM AND ASK THEM. This is important and is part of the value you are paying for when you purchase from these vendors.

A round stone would be wonderful, a classic. H VS2 would be quite safe. And if you get them from WF or BGD, and you are choosing their in-house stones, you can confirm with them personally that they are eye clean.

 

[alamana]

Maybe my question to ring owners rather than specialists is if someone showed you their new ring what is impressive? Do you think "Oh, that looks like an H" or "Oh my, look at the size of that!"? Is a .75 carat VS1 E noticeably nicer than a 1.2 carat SI1 G for example? Should I focus on carat weight and cut? On color and clarity? Middle of the range on each and so on?

What's impressive -- especially regarding the "Oh my, look at the size of that!" thing -- is cultural.

I'm a lawyer who is originally from the midwest living on the east coast who left the practice of law to go back to the arts. My lawyer friends here on the east coast don't find my 1.5 carat diamond impressive in the least (well the diamond connoisseurs do because of the great cut, but that's different). It takes over 2 carats to impress them, and most of them have center stones of at least two carats. Mostly solitaires. Back in the midwest town where I am from, my 1.5 carat diamond is impressive to pretty much everyone (and arguably tacky as hell to some folks ... including folks who have lots 'o money). There, anything much over a carat is impressive and I'd say the average center stone there is a bit under a carat (including the folks with lots 'o money). My friends in the arts (writing/theater) here on the east coast (in other words, those on much tighter budgets) tend to have center stones of about 1 carat, or perhaps smaller, like say a .6, with a halo. As lovely as many of those rings are, not many people in this area would call those rings "impressive" (I'm using your word here, on purpose).

Regarding clarity: It just needs to be eye clean. Regarding color: I start to notice tint around "I" -- I have an icy "E," I but I actually kind of like the warmer colors. Be aware that color does show more in the larger stones and it shows more in cushion and princess cuts than in rounds. Some (picture those east coast lawyer types I mentioned earlier) will wrinkle their nose a bit with noticeable tint in a very large diamond set in white metal. Regarding shape: Do not buy a princess cut unless she really, really wants one -- in some circles they are considered very out of style. Go with a round or cushion, bearing in mind that if size and budget are issues the rounds face up larger.

Sooooo ... these are just my thoughts as a "ring owner" based on experience. Hope this helps and hope it doesn't sound annoying or snooty -- this is the info you seemed to me to be after.

ETA: You asked about silver ... it's too soft.

 

[Niel]

Yes, I live in the Midwest and I'd say half ct is expected and .75+ is large.

You live in other areas you get different expectations.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Cut is number 1 in importance if you want the most beautiful stone. I think G-H and VS2 is an almost foolproof choice for most people (many here get SI1, too). Still very nice color and clarity without going to a smaller stone to get D-F VVS.

I posted these on the first page. I may have missed if you have decided on a budget yet.


http://www.whiteflash.com/loose-diamonds/round-cut-loose-diamond-3577103.htm

http://www.whiteflash.com/loose-diamonds/round-cut-loose-diamond-3590800.htm

 

[Rogueish]

I am so thrilled with all of the advice I have received, it's a lot to absorb all at once but I keep going back through the posts to recap everything. While I wouldn't say I've settled on a specific stone I feel I am close to a 1.0 - 1.25 Carat Round, probably G/H and VS1/VS2, the quality of cut is the part I'm still researching now I have a better understanding of its importance.

I also have a friend who has a friend who runs a diamond business, she is looking in to thinks on my behalf too and says I could get a great deal, the good news is that I now feel much more informed on determining if it is indeed a deal or not. I may have a dilemma in looking at getting the mount and the diamond from different places but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

To narrow things down further she did send me the attached picture as her current favorite, I think the notable thing is that the diamonds in the band are larger, the theory is that if they are there then they should be easy to see and apparent.

 

[Niel]

I am so thrilled with all of the advice I have received, it's a lot to absorb all at once but I keep going back through the posts to recap everything. While I wouldn't say I've settled on a specific stone I feel I am close to a 1.0 - 1.25 Carat Round, probably G/H and VS1/VS2, the quality of cut is the part I'm still researching now I have a better understanding of its importance.

I also have a friend who has a friend who runs a diamond business, she is looking in to thinks on my behalf too and says I could get a great deal, the good news is that I now feel much more informed on determining if it is indeed a deal or not. I may have a dilemma in looking at getting the mount and the diamond from different places but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

To narrow things down further she did send me the attached picture as her current favorite, I think the notable thing is that the diamonds in the band are larger, the theory is that if they are there then they should be easy to see and apparent.

be very wary of buying your ring from your friend

It's very easy to find people here who worked with a friend or family member and it rarely turns out well.