What's the most challenging event you ever experienced and...

[FlashyFlamingo]

My life has been like a sad, old country western song lately. I was in a catastrophic accident in January that resulted in multiple broken bones and surgeries and left me on bedrest for months. For a while I wasn’t even able to feed myself. I still can’t walk without a walker and my surgeon says that it can take up to a year to fully heal after the kind of break that I had.
Then my dog who had been paralyzed and had very expensive neurosurgery a few years ago started having horrible siezures which left her in terrible pain. The vet said that she needed to be put to sleep. So while I was still in a hospital bed at home with metal rods sticking out of my leg, (it’s called an external fixator and it hurts like hell) I had to say goodbye to my sweet and loyal little dog which broke my heart.
Speaking of broken hearts, sitting in a bed all day with nothing to do except watch Hulu and online shop leaves you with a lot of time to think. My fiancé did not handle the accident situation well and made it clear to me that I was cramping his style. When we got engaged, I knew that I was settling. He had his faults, a drinking problem being the biggest, but he also had a lot of good qualities and was fun to be around. When you’re in agony after a surgery, you don’t really want good time Charlie there cracking jokes with the doctors and making eyes at the nurses. So with ample time on my hands to think things over, I decided that I didn’t need to be with someone just to be with someone and broke it off with him. It was very hard to do as our lives has become quite intertwined, but I haven’t second guessed my decision yet.

I’ve chosen to put a positive spin on this. It has allowed me to be closer to my fantastic parents who have taken excellent care of me for the last several months. It has given me an out to quit a job working for an absolutely terrible boss. It has made me realize how much I enjoy the little things in life. I can’t tell you how excited I’m going to be when I can finally push a cart around Target again.
This accident has made me greatful about how wonderful my life is which I’d forgotten. Just a few of the things I’ve been reminded to be greatful of: I live on the beach and can sit on my balcony and watch dolphins play in the morning. I have wonderful friends who go out of their way to call and text me daily to see how I’m feeling. I have a beautiful, supportive family who have turned their lives upside down to take care of me through all of this.

So there you have it, my sad country song. I broke half my body, my dog died, and I dumped my fiancé. I’m making the best of it though!

 

[missy]

My life has been like a sad, old country western song lately. I was in a catastrophic accident in January that resulted in multiple broken bones and surgeries and left me on bedrest for months. For a while I wasn’t even able to feed myself. I still can’t walk without a walker and my surgeon says that it can take up to a year to fully heal after the kind of break that I had.
Then my dog who had been paralyzed and had very expensive neurosurgery a few years ago started having horrible siezures which left her in terrible pain. The vet said that she needed to be put to sleep. So while I was still in a hospital bed at home with metal rods sticking out of my leg, (it’s called an external fixator and it hurts like hell) I had to say goodbye to my sweet and loyal little dog which broke my heart.
Speaking of broken hearts, sitting in a bed all day with nothing to do except watch Hulu and online shop leaves you with a lot of time to think. My fiancé did not handle the accident situation well and made it clear to me that I was cramping his style. When we got engaged, I knew that I was settling. He had his faults, a drinking problem being the biggest, but he also had a lot of good qualities and was fun to be around. When you’re in agony after a surgery, you don’t really want good time Charlie there cracking jokes with the doctors and making eyes at the nurses. So with ample time on my hands to think things over, I decided that I didn’t need to be with someone just to be with someone and broke it off with him. It was very hard to do as our lives has become quite intertwined, but I haven’t second guessed my decision yet.

I’ve chosen to put a positive spin on this. It has allowed me to be closer to my fantastic parents who have taken excellent care of me for the last several months. It has given me an out to quit a job working for an absolutely terrible boss. It has made me realize how much I enjoy the little things in life. I can’t tell you how excited I’m going to be when I can finally push a cart around Target again.
This accident has made me greatful about how wonderful my life is which I’d forgotten. Just a few of the things I’ve been reminded to be greatful of: I live on the beach and can sit on my balcony and watch dolphins play in the morning. I have wonderful friends who go out of their way to call and text me daily to see how I’m feeling. I have a beautiful, supportive family who have turned their lives upside down to take care of me through all of this.

So there you have it, my sad country song. I broke half my body, my dog died, and I dumped my fiancé. I’m making the best of it though!

Dear @FlashyFlamingo I am so sorry for all you have been and are still currently going through. I am so sorry about your sweet dog's death and your terrible accident. I want to say though (and please do not be upset with me for saying this) your accident might have been a blessing in disguise. Yes it is a horrible accident and my heart goes out to you but OMG it gave you a wonderful gift. To say goodbye to a man who is just not worthy of you. To escape a lifetime of mediocrity at best and most likely great unhappiness being with a selfish man who does not love you unconditionally and has big issues. And allowed you to leave a job that was making you unhappy. I know a few things about bad bosses (and broken legs) and yup this accident has opened up new possibilities for you that will pay off greatly in time.

You are so brave and a new beginning and life is opening up for you. I know in my heart of hearts you will recover from this awful accident and you will find great happiness. You have taken the necessary steps and kudos to you. Most of us wouldn't have been able to make such a bold move at such a vulnerable time in our lives. You are freaking amazing.

Sending you gentle (((Hugs))) and healing vibes.

 

[FlashyFlamingo]

Dear @FlashyFlamingo I am so sorry for all you have been and are still currently going through. I am so sorry about your sweet dog's death and your terrible accident. I want to say though (and please do not be upset with me for saying this) your accident might have been a blessing in disguise. Yes it is a horrible accident and my heart goes out to you but OMG it gave you a wonderful gift. To say goodbye to a man who is just not worthy of you. To escape a lifetime of mediocrity at best and most likely great unhappiness being with a selfish man who does not love you unconditionally and has big issues. And allowed you to leave a job that was making you unhappy. I know a few things about bad bosses (and broken legs) and yup this accident has opened up new possibilities for you that will pay off greatly in time.

You are so brave and a new beginning and life is opening up for you. I know in my heart of hearts you will recover from this awful accident and you will find great happiness. You have taken the necessary steps and kudos to you. Most of us wouldn't have been able to make such a bold move at such a vulnerable time in our lives. You are freaking amazing.

Sending you gentle (((Hugs))) and healing vibes.

You are so incredibly sweet! I have been trying to frame it that way for myself. It’s really allowed me a lot of time to stop and think about what I’m willing to put up with in life. I don’t like the old adage: everything happens for a reason, but sometimes it feels like it does.

 

[missy]

You are so incredibly sweet! I have been trying to frame it that way for myself. It’s really allowed me a lot of time to stop and think about what I’m willing to put up with in life. I don’t like the old adage: everything happens for a reason, but sometimes it feels like it does.

Yes I totally get what you mean. I hate that adage too and definitely do not believe that everything happens for a reason. Too often bad things just happen.

But no matter why and what happens how we deal with it is key. We cannot control so many things in our life but we can control how we react and deal with traumatic events. And you are doing so amazingly well.

I am truly impressed with you and want you to know I am rooting for you and have great confidence things will not only improve for you but that life will be sweet again. (((Hugs))).

 

[AV_]

@FlashyFlamingo I Love You! & the sea...
I have not counted how many breaks are mentioned in your post - of bones & of people, but many are good breaks. I hope the fractures heal well & you get to forget they ever happened & fast. One year is not long; to me, barely nough to start a good round of research [the last took allot more & it is stll a hoot]

Hopefully you find this funny: your tag here made me think of a very flamboyant person - intently colourful & flashy [& there are so few!]. I see that the flash is something else - a blinding rift in life, turned brilliant. Why 'flamingo' though? Are there any around? The colour?

Happy to have heard your story!

 

[Drm1grl]

My most traumatic experiences (and I have had more than a few but these 2 are the most sad for me) were the unexpected death of my darling wonderful kind sweet grandmother back in 1992 from an asthma attack and the death of our beloved Billy in 2009 and our amazing Butch in 2002.

A few days before my grandma died she wasn't feeling well and was in resting in bed and I visited her as I always did weekly on my day off but only stopped by for a short while to say hi because it was such a lovely day and I wanted to be outside enjoying the weather. So I just popped in and visited with her just a short time and said grandma I will be back next week and of course she was agreeable. I did not realize that was the last time I would ever see her. I still beat myself up about that. It was selfish of me and of course hindsight is 20/20 (boy is it and wouldn't I love going back in time to 4 weeks ago but that is another story) but still I regret not visiting with her longer. I regret not being able to tell her how much I loved (and still do) her and how much she means to me. My heart still hurts with this memory and I will forever regret that day.

From 1970 or so...my entire family. We have a very small family. My grandma is on the left.


Then the other most traumatic experience was the loss of our beloved babies Billy and Butch. They were brothers found together in 1992 in the middle of a blizzard in Great Neck Long Island. 2 elderly sisters found them and called my sister who was their veterinarian. And somehow she convinced me to adopt them. That brought my kitty count from 1 to 3 and I have to say that was the beginning of the end for me re just being content with one cat lol.

Our dear Billy and Butch were special souls. Rescue kitties with personalities larger than life. Humans trapped in a cat's body. They were something else. They loved people and were not afraid of anything or anyone and just freaking awesome.

Billy developed diabetes and hypertension in his mid years and we gave him insulin twice a day for almost a decade. His poor body gave out after years of his diseases being treated and controlled as best as possible. His kidneys and other organs just gave out. Billy was truly special and one of a kind. And we had some amazing fur babies up to this point but no one could touch our Billy.

His orange haired brother Butch was also very special and died way too soon in 2002 from an aggressive cancer. He was smart as a whip and brazen and bold and just filled with love and mischief and never did we have a kitty as bright as Butch. He taught the other kitties how to play fetch and how to catch flies mid air. He never met a person he didn't love. He never met anyone he didn't charm. I know people say their babies are special and yes to us all our babies are special but objectively Billy and Butch were magical.

RIP Billy and Butch. I like to think you are at Rainbow Bridge frolicking and playing with each other and all our past beloved fur babies and my grandma is with you.


Buster (my first cat and also special) is in the front and butch (orange) is to his right and Billy (gray) is in the back. Old photo and only one I have of the three of them together.


My most joyous experience is marrying the love of my life. My B'shert. My soulmate. My sweet, funny, smart, kind, generous darling husband. I have known only 2 amazing men in my life and I am lucky they are both in my life. My dh and my dad. And if truth be told while my dad is amazing and the best dad one could hope for my dh is way more talented and skilled at almost everything. But where it counts they are both awesome. Loving kind souls with sharp wits and wonderful perspective on life. I love quoting my dad's wise comments to which my dh affectionally refers to as Stanelyisms. Listen my dad was a wise old soul before he got old.

My mom and dad on their wedding day over 55 years ago



Greg and I on our wedding day.




I hope there will be many more amazing wonderful joyous life experiences but to date this one is still tops. And while I know there will also be more traumatic and sad experiences I pray they stay at a minimum and far away.

Thank you all for sharing your memories and experiences. Life is a roller coaster filled with happy and tragic both and one never knows what is coming one's way but one thing we do know is wait a bit and surely things will change again.

Missy - I have been thinking about this post ever since I read it two nights ago. Like you, I was incredibly close to my grandmother - so I completely understand the loss. I believe that my Nana, and my guess is that there are similarities to your grandmother, would be extremely sad if something related to her still haunted me. Nana would want me to forgive myself and never let any memory of my times with her be anything but joyful. I hope you are able to comfort yourself that your grandmother understood that day - and that she knew how very much you loved her.

 

[missy]

Missy - I have been thinking about this post ever since I read it two nights ago. Like you, I was incredibly close to my grandmother - so I completely understand the loss. I believe that my Nana, and my guess is that there are similarities to your grandmother, would be extremely sad if something related to her still haunted me. Nana would want me to forgive myself and never let any memory of my times with her be anything but joyful. I hope you are able to comfort yourself that your grandmother understood that day - and that she knew how very much you loved her.

Thank you @Drm1grl, your kind post made me cry. It is so sweet of you to think of me and I love what you wrote.
I agree with you and I am glad you had a wonderful grandmother too.
I wish our dear grandmothers could still be here with us but hopefully one day we will be reunited with them.

Thank you so much for your kind words. (((Hugs))).

 

[LinSF]

I'm going through the most challenging years of my life right now, and that's saying a lot considering the obstacles I faced growing up. I keep saying that I can't handle one more thing, and then one more thing comes. My resilience is also my weakness.

I'm hesitant to post yet, but my heart goes out to you ladies who are sharing.

 

[Calliecake]

@LinSF , I feel the same when I hear people say things can’t get any worse. Things can always get worse, no matter what you are going thru. I’m sorry you are going thru a hard time right now. I hope things improve quickly for you.

@FlashyFlamingo , Hang in there honey.. Things may seems really hard now and you are understandably heartbroken. I have a feeling a little further down the line you will realize this may been a blessing in disguise regarding the man in your life. I’m so sorry about the accident and the loss of your sweet dog. Stay strong. Sometimes going thru hard things has a way of showing us our true inner strength. We also gain insight, compassion and empathy for others, which are all wonderful qualities.

Very few us get thru life without going thru trying times. It’s how we pick ourselves up and move on that matter.

@canuk-gal , I hope you are hanging in there and are doing better. What you went thru sounds awful. Somethings really shake us to our core and do change us. I hope who ever did this you has been apprehended. Going through what you described can really mess with your head, your sense of well being and security. Please let me know if your ever want to talk.

 

[mrs-b]

This isn't the most challenging event I've ever been through - but it's certainly the most recent and is sitting highest in my experience at the moment.

When I was 14, I pulled a drowning girl out of a swimming pool. As I lifted her out of the water, being unaware of general good practice for my back, I herniated 10 discs - 8 in my back and 2 in my neck. As a result, my spine is slightly cork-screwed (no, I don't look like a twisted tree trunk! The effects are inside my body - not outside!). As a result, this situation has damaged my vagus nerve and one of the problems I've had for the last 8 years is vagal nerve a-fib. My a-fib is posturally induced, and it throws my heart into chaotic rhythm (most common potential risk - stroke. Second most common potential risk - heart attack). As a result, I was put on a drug called amiodorone - a brutal, very, very strong drug with more side effects than I care to mention. But it kept my heart in sinus rhythm, so that was....ok....

But then, 6 weeks ago, I had to have my annual thyroid test. My thyroid readings to date have been pretty reasonable, but suddenly they went haywire. Amiodorone will destroy your thyroid, and can send you into a cycle of hypothyroidism AND hyperthyroidism - which was my experience. So.....

My doctors recommended I have a cardiac ablation. Pronto. This involves burning away tiny spots in your heart that receive the messages from your pulmonary nerves to beat incorrectly. They burn away those reception sites, and your heart (ideally) loses its ability to go into a-fib.

So I had this on Wednesday (I was lucky - at worst, it can take up to 7 or 8 hours, but mine was done in 4) and - while I wouldn't change this for the world, as the opportunity to be both a-fib AND amiodorone free is precious beyond belief - can I just say - just this once......

IT HUUUUUUURTSSSSS!

My heart is very swollen and I have huge lungs - partly genetically and partly from having my voice trained (opera) for a number of years. I only take about 6 breaths per minute, and they're big and deep. At the moment, tho, I can't do that, so I'm doing that 'sick puppy' breathing thing - fast and shallow - where every one bounces my lungs off my heart and hurts like Hades! I've had multiple surgeries in my life and cannot remember anything that hurt as much as this. I also have small veins, and they struggled to find an insertion point for my IV. When I woke up after the surgery, I had 3 different IVs hanging out my arms (none of them connected to anything - so why didn't they remove 2 of them, for Pete's sake??) - and three more points where they'd tried and couldn't get an access point at all. So all in all - ow! ow! ow! ow! OOOWWWW!!

On the other hand.....

I have already gone off amiodorone - last dose pre surgery - so I have a chance of getting out of both hyper and hypothyroidism! ENERGY BACK! HAIR!! WEIGHT STABILIZING!!! And a heart that beats regularly and reliably. And in getting rid of the a-fib, my increased risk of stroke and heart attack may well disappear. So after this hideous experience, what I might be left with is hope.

And I haven't had that for a long time.

 

[MamaBee]

This isn't the most challenging event I've ever been through - but it's certainly the most recent and is sitting highest in my experience at the moment.

When I was 14, I pulled a drowning girl out of a swimming pool. As I lifted her out of the water, being unaware of general good practice for my back, I herniated 10 discs - 8 in my back and 2 in my neck. As a result, my spine is slightly cork-screwed (no, I don't look like a twisted tree trunk! The effects are inside my body - not outside!). As a result, this situation has damaged my vagus nerve and one of the problems I've had for the last 8 years is vagal nerve a-fib. My a-fib is posturally induced, and it throws my heart into chaotic rhythm (most common potential risk - stroke. Second most common potential risk - heart attack). As a result, I was put on a drug called amiodorone - a brutal, very, very strong drug with more side effects than I care to mention. But it kept my heart in sinus rhythm, so that was....ok....

But then, 6 weeks ago, I had to have my annual thyroid test. My thyroid readings to date have been pretty reasonable, but suddenly they went haywire. Amiodorone will destroy your thyroid, and can send you into a cycle of hypothyroidism AND hyperthyroidism - which was my experience. So.....

My doctors recommended I have a cardiac ablation. Pronto. This involves burning away tiny spots in your heart that receive the messages from your pulmonary nerves to beat incorrectly. They burn away those reception sites, and your heart (ideally) loses its ability to go into a-fib.

So I had this on Wednesday (I was lucky - at worst, it can take up to 7 or 8 hours, but mine was done in 4) and - while I wouldn't change this for the world, as the opportunity to be both a-fib AND amiodorone free is precious beyond belief - can I just say - just this once......

IT HUUUUUUURTSSSSS!

My heart is very swollen and I have huge lungs - partly genetically and partly from having my voice trained (opera) for a number of years. I only take about 6 breaths per minute, and they're big and deep. At the moment, tho, I can't do that, so I'm doing that 'sick puppy' breathing thing - fast and shallow - where every one bounces my lungs off my heart and hurts like Hades! I've had multiple surgeries in my life and cannot remember anything that hurt as much as this. I also have small veins, and they struggled to find an insertion point for my IV. When I woke up after the surgery, I had 3 different IVs hanging out my arms (none of them connected to anything - so why didn't they remove 2 of them, for Pete's sake??) - and three more points where they'd tried and couldn't get an access point at all. So all in all - ow! ow! ow! ow! OOOWWWW!!

On the other hand.....

I have already gone off amiodorone - last dose pre surgery - so I have a chance of getting out of both hyper and hypothyroidism! ENERGY BACK! HAIR!! WEIGHT STABILIZING!!! And a heart that beats regularly and reliably. And in getting rid of the a-fib, my increased risk of stroke and heart attack may well disappear. So after this hideous experience, what I might be left with is hope.

And I haven't had that for a long time.

Oh @mrs-b I’m so sorry you had to go through all this! It sounds like this was the right thing to do..but that would be traumatizing for anyone to go through. I’m sending you lots of prayers that you get all your energy back..along with all the good things you mentioned..

 

[missy]

This isn't the most challenging event I've ever been through - but it's certainly the most recent and is sitting highest in my experience at the moment.

When I was 14, I pulled a drowning girl out of a swimming pool. As I lifted her out of the water, being unaware of general good practice for my back, I herniated 10 discs - 8 in my back and 2 in my neck. As a result, my spine is slightly cork-screwed (no, I don't look like a twisted tree trunk! The effects are inside my body - not outside!). As a result, this situation has damaged my vagus nerve and one of the problems I've had for the last 8 years is vagal nerve a-fib. My a-fib is posturally induced, and it throws my heart into chaotic rhythm (most common potential risk - stroke. Second most common potential risk - heart attack). As a result, I was put on a drug called amiodorone - a brutal, very, very strong drug with more side effects than I care to mention. But it kept my heart in sinus rhythm, so that was....ok....

But then, 6 weeks ago, I had to have my annual thyroid test. My thyroid readings to date have been pretty reasonable, but suddenly they went haywire. Amiodorone will destroy your thyroid, and can send you into a cycle of hypothyroidism AND hyperthyroidism - which was my experience. So.....

My doctors recommended I have a cardiac ablation. Pronto. This involves burning away tiny spots in your heart that receive the messages from your pulmonary nerves to beat incorrectly. They burn away those reception sites, and your heart (ideally) loses its ability to go into a-fib.

So I had this on Wednesday (I was lucky - at worst, it can take up to 7 or 8 hours, but mine was done in 4) and - while I wouldn't change this for the world, as the opportunity to be both a-fib AND amiodorone free is precious beyond belief - can I just say - just this once......

IT HUUUUUUURTSSSSS!

My heart is very swollen and I have huge lungs - partly genetically and partly from having my voice trained (opera) for a number of years. I only take about 6 breaths per minute, and they're big and deep. At the moment, tho, I can't do that, so I'm doing that 'sick puppy' breathing thing - fast and shallow - where every one bounces my lungs off my heart and hurts like Hades! I've had multiple surgeries in my life and cannot remember anything that hurt as much as this. I also have small veins, and they struggled to find an insertion point for my IV. When I woke up after the surgery, I had 3 different IVs hanging out my arms (none of them connected to anything - so why didn't they remove 2 of them, for Pete's sake??) - and three more points where they'd tried and couldn't get an access point at all. So all in all - ow! ow! ow! ow! OOOWWWW!!

On the other hand.....

I have already gone off amiodorone - last dose pre surgery - so I have a chance of getting out of both hyper and hypothyroidism! ENERGY BACK! HAIR!! WEIGHT STABILIZING!!! And a heart that beats regularly and reliably. And in getting rid of the a-fib, my increased risk of stroke and heart attack may well disappear. So after this hideous experience, what I might be left with is hope.

And I haven't had that for a long time.

@mrs-b, I am sending you continued healing vibes and gentle hugs. You are going through such a challenging time but as always doing it with grace and courage.

 

[mrs-b]

Thanks, ladies. The encouragement truly helps. My best girlfriend - a very experienced and very good nurse - arrives from Australia this evening, so I expect to be spoilt and have my pillows expertly fluffed for the next 2 weeks.

 

[carbonfan]

This isn't the most challenging event I've ever been through - but it's certainly the most recent and is sitting highest in my experience at the moment.

When I was 14, I pulled a drowning girl out of a swimming pool. As I lifted her out of the water, being unaware of general good practice for my back, I herniated 10 discs - 8 in my back and 2 in my neck. As a result, my spine is slightly cork-screwed (no, I don't look like a twisted tree trunk! The effects are inside my body - not outside!). As a result, this situation has damaged my vagus nerve and one of the problems I've had for the last 8 years is vagal nerve a-fib. My a-fib is posturally induced, and it throws my heart into chaotic rhythm (most common potential risk - stroke. Second most common potential risk - heart attack). As a result, I was put on a drug called amiodorone - a brutal, very, very strong drug with more side effects than I care to mention. But it kept my heart in sinus rhythm, so that was....ok....

But then, 6 weeks ago, I had to have my annual thyroid test. My thyroid readings to date have been pretty reasonable, but suddenly they went haywire. Amiodorone will destroy your thyroid, and can send you into a cycle of hypothyroidism AND hyperthyroidism - which was my experience. So.....

My doctors recommended I have a cardiac ablation. Pronto. This involves burning away tiny spots in your heart that receive the messages from your pulmonary nerves to beat incorrectly. They burn away those reception sites, and your heart (ideally) loses its ability to go into a-fib.

So I had this on Wednesday (I was lucky - at worst, it can take up to 7 or 8 hours, but mine was done in 4) and - while I wouldn't change this for the world, as the opportunity to be both a-fib AND amiodorone free is precious beyond belief - can I just say - just this once......

IT HUUUUUUURTSSSSS!

My heart is very swollen and I have huge lungs - partly genetically and partly from having my voice trained (opera) for a number of years. I only take about 6 breaths per minute, and they're big and deep. At the moment, tho, I can't do that, so I'm doing that 'sick puppy' breathing thing - fast and shallow - where every one bounces my lungs off my heart and hurts like Hades! I've had multiple surgeries in my life and cannot remember anything that hurt as much as this. I also have small veins, and they struggled to find an insertion point for my IV. When I woke up after the surgery, I had 3 different IVs hanging out my arms (none of them connected to anything - so why didn't they remove 2 of them, for Pete's sake??) - and three more points where they'd tried and couldn't get an access point at all. So all in all - ow! ow! ow! ow! OOOWWWW!!

On the other hand.....

I have already gone off amiodorone - last dose pre surgery - so I have a chance of getting out of both hyper and hypothyroidism! ENERGY BACK! HAIR!! WEIGHT STABILIZING!!! And a heart that beats regularly and reliably. And in getting rid of the a-fib, my increased risk of stroke and heart attack may well disappear. So after this hideous experience, what I might be left with is hope.

And I haven't had that for a long time.

I am so sorry to hear all of this, @mrs-b... what an incredibly painful ordeal to go through. But it is our response to life's turbulence and tribulation that matters most, and I truly admire your grace and resilience through it all! Enjoy this well-deserved down time with your girlfriend, and may the positive effects from the procedure continue, along with renewed hope! ((Hugs!))

 

[mrs-b]

I am so sorry to hear all of this, @mrs-b... what an incredibly painful ordeal to go through. But it is our response to life's turbulence and tribulation that matters most, and I truly admire your grace and resilience through it all! Enjoy this well-deserved down time with your girlfriend, and may the positive effects from the procedure continue, along with renewed hope! ((Hugs!))

Thanks, @carbonfan. I truly am aiming for 'grace' - tho I suspect my husband would tell you what I'm actually achieving is closer to 'grumpy'. He just caught me out in the kitchen saying hallo to the dogs, and man, did I ever get shuffled back to bed in double quick time! I never do anything truly terrible, but in general I'm not good with rules....

 

[carbonfan]

Thanks, @carbonfan. I truly am aiming for 'grace' - tho I suspect my husband would tell you what I'm actually achieving is closer to 'grumpy'. He just caught me out in the kitchen saying hallo to the dogs, and man, did I ever get shuffled back to bed in double quick time! I never do anything truly terrible, but in general I'm not good with rules....

Oh, I think you and I would get along famously, @mrs-b! What was that quote from The Portrait of a Lady... “I always want to know the things one shouldn't do." "So as to do them?" asked her aunt. "So as to choose." said Isabel. I mean, some rules are just meant to be broken... but please try to sneak some quality recovery time in first, just to stay on the safe side!

 

[mrs-b]

@carbonfan - I could adore you just on the basis of having read Henry James! The classics are horribly overlooked these days.

 

[bling_dream19]

Wow, so sorry you are going through this mrs-b but I hope you can enjoy the recovery time and know you will be in even better health. Hoping you feel better soon.

 

[AV_]

I truly am aiming for 'grace'

You've got it.

 

[violet3]

My life has been like a sad, old country western song lately. I was in a catastrophic accident in January that resulted in multiple broken bones and surgeries and left me on bedrest for months. For a while I wasn’t even able to feed myself. I still can’t walk without a walker and my surgeon says that it can take up to a year to fully heal after the kind of break that I had.
Then my dog who had been paralyzed and had very expensive neurosurgery a few years ago started having horrible siezures which left her in terrible pain. The vet said that she needed to be put to sleep. So while I was still in a hospital bed at home with metal rods sticking out of my leg, (it’s called an external fixator and it hurts like hell) I had to say goodbye to my sweet and loyal little dog which broke my heart.
Speaking of broken hearts, sitting in a bed all day with nothing to do except watch Hulu and online shop leaves you with a lot of time to think. My fiancé did not handle the accident situation well and made it clear to me that I was cramping his style. When we got engaged, I knew that I was settling. He had his faults, a drinking problem being the biggest, but he also had a lot of good qualities and was fun to be around. When you’re in agony after a surgery, you don’t really want good time Charlie there cracking jokes with the doctors and making eyes at the nurses. So with ample time on my hands to think things over, I decided that I didn’t need to be with someone just to be with someone and broke it off with him. It was very hard to do as our lives has become quite intertwined, but I haven’t second guessed my decision yet.

I’ve chosen to put a positive spin on this. It has allowed me to be closer to my fantastic parents who have taken excellent care of me for the last several months. It has given me an out to quit a job working for an absolutely terrible boss. It has made me realize how much I enjoy the little things in life. I can’t tell you how excited I’m going to be when I can finally push a cart around Target again.
This accident has made me greatful about how wonderful my life is which I’d forgotten. Just a few of the things I’ve been reminded to be greatful of: I live on the beach and can sit on my balcony and watch dolphins play in the morning. I have wonderful friends who go out of their way to call and text me daily to see how I’m feeling. I have a beautiful, supportive family who have turned their lives upside down to take care of me through all of this.

So there you have it, my sad country song. I broke half my body, my dog died, and I dumped my fiancé. I’m making the best of it though!

Goodness, I wish I could give you a hug. You are a strong lady!

 

[violet3]

For me, it's a tie. The death of my mother was pretty rough, and not being able to have children. I think the two are equally hard to endure - not having a mother and not being a mother either, leaves me feeling sort of lost in this world.

My mother suffered great depression and anxiety after we all left for college, and she became an alcoholic late in life (compared to most others I know). She basically killed herself over a very painful decade, for both of us, during which time I was her caretaker on a regular basis. It was truly awful to watch, and I still have terrible anger over the whole thing.

The childless thing is usually bearable, but my youngest brother just had a baby, so now I'm the only one of us 4 siblings without children, and it opened up the wound pretty deeply, so I cry a lot these days. Any other people on here have this trouble? If so, I'd love to hear how you deal with it. I wish I could handle it a little more gracefully than I have been able to so far.

The best thing that happened to me was marrying my sweet husband, for whom I am grateful every day.

 

[MamaBee]

Thanks, ladies. The encouragement truly helps. My best girlfriend - a very experienced and very good nurse - arrives from Australia this evening, so I expect to be spoilt and have my pillows expertly fluffed for the next 2 weeks.

I’m sooo happy you will be looked after by your friend. How wonderful she’s coming from Australia to be with you!

 

[MamaBee]

My life has been like a sad, old country western song lately. I was in a catastrophic accident in January that resulted in multiple broken bones and surgeries and left me on bedrest for months. For a while I wasn’t even able to feed myself. I still can’t walk without a walker and my surgeon says that it can take up to a year to fully heal after the kind of break that I had.
Then my dog who had been paralyzed and had very expensive neurosurgery a few years ago started having horrible siezures which left her in terrible pain. The vet said that she needed to be put to sleep. So while I was still in a hospital bed at home with metal rods sticking out of my leg, (it’s called an external fixator and it hurts like hell) I had to say goodbye to my sweet and loyal little dog which broke my heart.
Speaking of broken hearts, sitting in a bed all day with nothing to do except watch Hulu and online shop leaves you with a lot of time to think. My fiancé did not handle the accident situation well and made it clear to me that I was cramping his style. When we got engaged, I knew that I was settling. He had his faults, a drinking problem being the biggest, but he also had a lot of good qualities and was fun to be around. When you’re in agony after a surgery, you don’t really want good time Charlie there cracking jokes with the doctors and making eyes at the nurses. So with ample time on my hands to think things over, I decided that I didn’t need to be with someone just to be with someone and broke it off with him. It was very hard to do as our lives has become quite intertwined, but I haven’t second guessed my decision yet.

I’ve chosen to put a positive spin on this. It has allowed me to be closer to my fantastic parents who have taken excellent care of me for the last several months. It has given me an out to quit a job working for an absolutely terrible boss. It has made me realize how much I enjoy the little things in life. I can’t tell you how excited I’m going to be when I can finally push a cart around Target again.
This accident has made me greatful about how wonderful my life is which I’d forgotten. Just a few of the things I’ve been reminded to be greatful of: I live on the beach and can sit on my balcony and watch dolphins play in the morning. I have wonderful friends who go out of their way to call and text me daily to see how I’m feeling. I have a beautiful, supportive family who have turned their lives upside down to take care of me through all of this.

So there you have it, my sad country song. I broke half my body, my dog died, and I dumped my fiancé. I’m making the best of it though!

@FlashyFlamingo You are an incredibly strong woman to come out from this painful time in your life..Other people would have come out bitter..but you have come out stronger than ever. I’m happy you broke it off with your then fiancé..and now have a new appreciation for your family. {{{{Hug}}}}

 

[MamaBee]

For me, it's a tie. The death of my mother was pretty rough, and not being able to have children. I think the two are equally hard to endure - not having a mother and not being a mother either, leaves me feeling sort of lost in this world.

My mother suffered great depression and anxiety after we all left for college, and she became an alcoholic late in life (compared to most others I know). She basically killed herself over a very painful decade, for both of us, during which time I was her caretaker on a regular basis. It was truly awful to watch, and I still have terrible anger over the whole thing.

The childless thing is usually bearable, but my youngest brother just had a baby, so now I'm the only one of us 4 siblings without children, and it opened up the wound pretty deeply, so I cry a lot these days. Any other people on here have this trouble? If so, I'd love to hear how you deal with it. I wish I could handle it a little more gracefully than I have been able to so far.

The best thing that happened to me was marrying my sweet husband, for whom I am grateful every day.

Alcoholism is terrible for everyone including the alcoholic..I grew up with a father who was an alcoholic..It was a terrible childhood. I also know someone that is one... (not my husband TG) and puts everyone through stress...You have been a good daughter....I can easily see why you would be angry...
I’m sorry that you’re hurt that you can’t have children...It must be very hard to see your brothers and sisters have children..I’m hoping that in time it will be easier for you..{{Big hug}}

 

[lovedogs]

You are all so strong and wonderful, and I appreciate every single one of you! So happy I found PS, because I've met such lovely people. I've had lots of horrible stuff, but have also experienced lots of wonderful things as well.

 

[Austina]

That is the truly wonderful thing about this place, it’s safe to share life’s trials and tribulations, when often times, we don’t always feel we can with those closest to us.

The support and kindness of people we don’t know, and for the most part, will probably never meet, restores one faith in human nature.

If one person reads a thread and gets something out of it, whether it’s comfort, commiserations, or just straightforward advice, then it’s been a very good day.

I think the willingness to share some of the truly awful things that have happened, gives perspective and hope to those who may be going through something similar. This place is full of truly, courageous and caring people.

 

[Bonfire]

I just went through a double mastectomy 3 days ago for breast cancer.
Definitely a physical and emotional challenge, but that is what life can throw at you. I will persevere.

 

[missy]

I just went through a double mastectomy 3 days ago for breast cancer.
Definitely a physical and emotional challenge, but that is what life can throw at you. I will persevere.

Sending you bucketloads of healing dust Bonfire. And gentle (((hugs))). Wishing you a complete recovery.

 

[junebug17]

@Bonfire, I'm so sorry you had to go through this - I'm wishing you a smooth and speedy recovery. Sending you love and lots of healing dust (((HUGS)))

 

[MamaBee]

@Bonfire I’m sending you a big hug and wishes for a fast recovery. Thank you for sharing this with us. I hope you come here often to let us know how you’re doing. I’m so sorry you have to face this challenge....but I have no doubt that you will persevere.