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Too big? Should I reset?

Discussion in 'Jewelry Pieces' started by Lynniiee, May 16, 2019 at 1:08 PM.

  1. Lynniiee
    Rough_Rock

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    by Lynniiee » May 16, 2019 at 1:08 PM
    My fiancé and I just got engaged about 2 weeks ago with a ring we custom designed together, and it’s absolutely gorgeous.

    The only problem is... I think it may be too big for my comfort zone. The reception has been very nice, no negative comments, just a lot of “ITS HUGE”, but I’m just not sure if it sits right with me yet. If it were just me and this ring, I’d never take it off. I have no issues with it’s size, and I’ve been trying not to care about outside perception but it’s definitely been bugging me more than I expected.

    It’s a 2.58 H VS2, and I also realized I might be a more color sensitive than I thought. I’m thinking of maybe going down to 2-2.25ct in a better color grade.

    I have a great upgrade policy on the stone, the only issue is the stone was purchased separate and the setting was done by David Klass. I was wondering if anyone had any experience changing the stone in their setting? How long it might take, if it’ll absolutely need to be sent to DK again because of the size change, or if it can just be switched out.

    Or, should I just wait it out and get over it? I live in a big city where big stones aren’t uncommon, but it definitely still stands out. I’m comfortable at work and home, but traveling to see our families is a bit of a different world.
    783C4012-8958-4A18-AE52-2CBE3D3E3AF1.jpeg
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  2. Lynniiee
    Rough_Rock

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    by Lynniiee » May 16, 2019 at 1:30 PM
    Oops, I also messed up the title. I don't intend to reset the same stone, I mean to switch to a different stone into the same setting. :silenced: Not enough sleep...
     
  3. lambskin
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by lambskin » May 16, 2019 at 1:40 PM
    I think your ring is beautiful and not too big. The H color does not show up on pics and since it is a solitaire it is not competing with other stones colors. IMHO, it is stunning and I would keep it.
     
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  4. bludiva
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by bludiva » May 16, 2019 at 2:00 PM
    I'd say give it a little time to see if the discomfort on the size is temporary or not. Other people pay attention to a ring and make comments when you first get engaged or married but after that not so much. I think the tolerances with that type of basket are pretty small so going down in size may require remaking the ring (which is very pretty, btw!)
     
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  5. Austina
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Austina » May 16, 2019 at 2:16 PM
    I think it’s gorgeous and looks the perfect size for your hand. I second @bludiva, live with it for a while longer and see what you think. It’s surprisingly easy to used to the size, and you could regret going smaller in the future.

    It looks perfect to me :love:
     
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  6. LLJsmom
    Ideal_Rock

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    by LLJsmom » May 16, 2019 at 3:11 PM
    Do you feel it’s too big or is it that others’ Opinions bother you? If you are really uncomfortable regardless of other people then yeah. Make a change. But do give it time. It usually takes a little while before DSS sets in.

    If I don’t want to hear it from other relatives I just don’t wear it if I know I will see them.
     
  7. missy
    Super_Ideal_Rock

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    by missy » May 16, 2019 at 5:07 PM
    IF you're asking if we think it is too big my answer is a resounding No. IMO it's perfect. Beautiful and big as in perfect size. But it's your decision only. A personal decision. You have to love and feel comfortable wearing your ring. Give it some time and see how you feel. DSS is real and it sinks in quicker than you can say upgrade please. 8):cheeky:

    As for other people and what they think of your ring remember the wise saying...it's none of our business what other people think of us. :halo:

    Do what you want to do, wear what you want to wear and enjoy life on your terms. You deserve that.
     
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  8. tigertales
    Shiny_Rock

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    by tigertales » May 16, 2019 at 5:13 PM
    Ugh, the subtle shaming of "it's HUGE!"

    Your ring, and the size of your diamond are beyond gorgeous. I don't even think it's so outrageously big as to be showy or ostentatious. And the color is perfect in the gold. Please don't change it, unless of course, YOU want a different look or feel.
     
  9. Gussie
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Gussie » May 16, 2019 at 5:56 PM
    It's glorious! Please let it settle in for a while before downsizing. I also had qualms about wearing my ring in front of my in-laws. At first. Now I don't even give it a thought. As @missy said, it's not your business what others think of you, even family. Enjoy that beautiful ring!
     
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  10. Lynniiee
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    by Lynniiee » May 16, 2019 at 10:40 PM
    Thank you guys so much, I really appreciate it! I really love the crap out of it as-is, so I'm going to stick with it a while longer. We are visiting his family next weekend and they're all sweethearts I truly love, I hope they'll be supportive.
     
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  11. OoohShiny
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    by OoohShiny » May 17, 2019 at 4:09 AM
    Anyone who is not totally supportive and pleased for you is likely to be jealous, secretly or overtly - and as @missy says, we can't control what other people think so let them get on with it and rock whatever you want to rock ;-) :))

    As long as you are proud of it but not boastful, and I don't get any sense that you are a boastful, 'one-up' sort of person from your post, you should be fine! :)

    Use common sense in new places or areas that are likely to be risky, of course, and turn it into your palm, but I am sure you won't have any issues!
     
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  12. Luce
    Brilliant_Rock

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    by Luce » May 17, 2019 at 9:19 AM
    @Lynniiee , Your Ering is drop dead gorgeous! It may take a little while to get used to the size but if I were you, I would not change a thing. Congratulations!!!
     
  13. Bonfire
    Ideal_Rock

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    by Bonfire » May 17, 2019 at 11:43 AM
    Gorgeous ring. It looks stunning on you! Congratulations!
    I agree with those who advise to give it some time. If something about the stone bothers you that’s one thing. If it’s because of what others think of it then please pause and think carefully. This ring is not about them. It’s about you and your DF. Don’t let others judgement rain on your parade or cause you to conform to their standard. All the best to you!
     
  14. DAF
    Shiny_Rock

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    by DAF » May 17, 2019 at 9:13 PM
    The center diamond is a perfect size for your finger. Yes, it's bigger than most, but it looks great on you. Lovely diamond, too.
     
  15. Iwanttosparkle
    Rough_Rock

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    by Iwanttosparkle » May 18, 2019 at 10:16 AM
    Some people are impossible to please, especially family (ask me how I know. ha!). These same people would likely be making similar comments had you showed up in a new car or even with a new handbag or shoes that is outside of their norms. Do and have and wear what *you* think is beautiful :)
     
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  16. kmoro
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    by kmoro » May 19, 2019 at 6:52 AM
    Haha ... my ex-fiance’s daughter once exclaimed/yelled “IT’S SO SMALL!” when she saw the ring I got from her dad (it was maybe a .3 ct) ... I think it’s better to have them say it’s huge! lol

    I know we all say that we shouldn’t care what others’ think, but there are not too many of us that really don’t care what others’ think. To some extent, it does matter - to the extent that you are sensitive to it. However, you said large diamonds are not uncommon where you live, and you love your ring - and I agree with all the others - it looks wonderful on your hand, and omg, it is gorgeous! I think that once everyone has seen it, you’ll start to relax. Those initial reactions can have an impact, despite our steely determination, but then they will pass. After that, it will be strangers - and it’s much easier not to care what they think. I think sometimes that judgement comes from a misinterpretation of the motive behind having a larger diamond ring ... that someone is showing off or being frivolous, for example ... but if they know how much happy the diamond brings you, then it becomes something else (positive if they like you, lol)

    I remember my boss ... because I am a diamond fan, the first time I caught her wearing a gorgeous diamond, I said (with a lot of joy, btw), wow, is that a two carat? And she immediately pulled her hand away and stuck it under the desk, turning a bright red. Then she said that her husband just bought a new vehicle, so ... Anyway, I’ve often thought about that ... in our workplace, no one wears larger diamonds, but she and her husband could well afford it and two carats is not the rock of gibraltar, you know? The thing is, it’s no fun to wear a diamond if you feel like hiding it under your desk. And I was giving her a positive reaction.

    I guess I’m trying to say that people are going to judge, but it doesn’t matter what size your diamond is for them to do it ... you could be wearing a one carat and someone might call it huge and someone might call it small, for example. I think that the likely reactions in your circle and how you feel about those reactions is something to think about when purchasing a diamond.

    Back to the point: I think that diamond looks perfect on your hand and it is a beauty! Since the setting can not be easily adjusted, I’m with those that suggest giving it some time. But if it continues to bother you, I hope you don’t end up beating yourself up for that, and it would be a good idea to make some changes. The goal is to find your long term happy diamond, right? That should mean happy in every way, imo. I am hoping that you learn to love the size ... that way, if the colour continues to bother you, it’s an easier fix ... and it’s perfect ... oh I said that already, haha.

    I suggest just staying on the PS forums ... if DSS does not set in naturally, hanging on the forums can probably induce it ;)2
    Congratulations on your engagement and your gorgeous ring! :wavey:
     
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  17. arkieb1
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    by arkieb1 » May 20, 2019 at 12:33 AM
    I think only you can know which colour is right for you, both size and colour are completely subjective what is white for one person may not be for the next what is big for one person also might not be for someone else.

    I'm a size whore all the way, I like big diamonds and coloured stones but, I think it depends on where you are and what you feel is appropriate for your lifestyle.
     
  18. LinSF
    Shiny_Rock

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    by LinSF » May 21, 2019 at 12:06 PM
    I would give it some time, I bet you'll love it as is. I felt slightly uncomfortable when I started wearing my rings as well, but I quickly got over it. Like others have said, you love it and it fits your lifestyle. I can only imagine that both of your families will be thrilled for you and love the ring. :)
     

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