The Sad Truth

[rainwood]

Unwrinkled skin is wasted on the young. Your hands should become smoother as you age because that's when you'd really appreciate it.

And Haven came up with one of my favorite lines ever in this threadr: "Dude, seriously--they're just rings."

 

[rosetta]

What a weird notion, that younger women should have bigger diamonds because they have less wrinkles.

I'm 30, relatively unwrinkled, but I'll be gosh darned if I don't don't get bigger rocks when im old, haggard and have nothing better to do but stare at said rocks all day

Coz I would feel like I'd earned every little sparkle by then. I get great pleasure looking at the huge and beautiful rocks on the hands of our more mature PS members. Those are the ones that have great significance and represent a life lived and relationships nurtured over decades. An achievement.

And I would rather have a minuscule e-ring bought by my fiancé's hard-earned money, than a gigantic diamond bought by his daddy's cash. I think you'll find a lot of self-respecting women feel the same.

 

[Circe]

What a weird notion, that younger women should have bigger diamonds because they have less wrinkles.

Rosetta, I think it's the philosophical implications of this that bothers me most, not so much Kilops' individual posting of it ... because I think it's the (il)logical extension of the obsession with youth, and specifically, beautiful youth in females, that our culture exercises across the board. Generally speaking, we judge women on their ability to adhere to a single standard of beauty - which is in general young, slender, childlike, and unthreatening.

Men get distinguished, women get old, isn't that how the saying goes? It's just another way of dismissing women who don't meet the baseline standard of value in a sexist world - the standard whereby men want to bone them. A lot of women have commented on how, even online, if a man disagrees with a woman, the first line of attack is usually on her looks - calling her old, fat, ugly ... fundamentally, undesirable. This is just the flip side of the coin ....

 

[iota15]

Almost every girl wants a diamond, and some even come out to say they want a "big" one.

You realize diamonds are expensive; however, until you actually shop for a "big" one, you don't know how reeeallly expensive they are.

Personally, I would rather have a modest, beautiful ring that came from the heart, than to effectively bankrupt my soon-to-be-fiance and wipe his savings because of my preferences and whim.

Your savings will soon be Her money too. You think this financial set back will only cost or hinder your dream honeymoon. I have to ask - have you priced out a wedding yet? Because if not (muhahahahHAHAHAHA) whatever you think it costs - consider what you would do if it were TRIPLE that amount! Even simple weddings cost, laughably, uncomfortably, A LOT!

Remember, you are treating all of your friends and relatives to a nice dinner and a night of dancing. Have you ever treated a group of friends to dinner? Now imagine treating a room full of people to one. Then add decorations, a professional photographer, venue costs, wedding bands. If you fiance can buy a beautiful wedding dress for under $500, other brides will be shocked! It's not impossible but she would have found a "steal" at that price. And what about a home? Do you want to rent forever? Even if mommy and daddy offered to finance part of your wedding, would you prefer to put that money towards a downpayment?

What I suggest is, besides talking about just the ring, is your future - your financial future. Decide where your priorities lie, and where you BOTH plan to use a very limited resource at this time (money). Is it a home? a ring? a wedding? a new TV? whatever.

 

[rosetta]

What a weird notion, that younger women should have bigger diamonds because they have less wrinkles.

Rosetta, I think it's the philosophical implications of this that bothers me most, not so much Kilops' individual posting of it ... because I think it's the (il)logical extension of the obsession with youth, and specifically, beautiful youth in females, that our culture exercises across the board. Generally speaking, we judge women on their ability to adhere to a single standard of beauty - which is in general young, slender, childlike, and unthreatening.

Men get distinguished, women get old, isn't that how the saying goes? It's just another way of dismissing women who don't meet the baseline standard of value in a sexist world - the standard whereby men want to bone them. A lot of women have commented on how, even online, if a man disagrees with a woman, the first line of attack is usually on her looks - calling her old, fat, ugly ... fundamentally, undesirable. This is just the flip side of the coin ....

I couldn't have put it better. I feel Kilops is merely expressing these societal preconceptions.

A young beautiful woman somehow "deserves" the bigger rock by virtue of her youth and beauty.

 

[merilenda]

JewelFreak, I like your reply. I do intend on sitting down and really talking this out before the proposal. Even if she knows the proposal is coming, at least I still have the element of surprise on how I am going to do it. Also, thank you for finally being a person that can see from my side that what I really want is for her to get what she wants and for her to be happy. The ring to me is worthless because you cant eat it, you cant drive it, you cant sleep in it, and you cant do anything with it but to look at it. I would much rather look at my wife than to look at the ring anyday no matter the size of the ring or the age of my wife.

Kilops, I think you would have had a lot more luck getting people to "see it from your side" if you had come to the forum as a young man asking for advice/assistance in buying an e-ring for your GF. Instead, you came in and made a comment that large diamonds look better on young hands and not old, wrinkly ones.

Maybe you should start over with a new thread stating your budget and a general idea of what your GF is wanting in a ring. I bet you'll get a much more positive response. PS gets posts like that quite a bit, and people are generally more than happy to help.

 

[JewelFreak]

Kilops is ok. I think he was venting because he wants to please his FI & this ring thing has him in a knot. I also think he's crazy about the girl & not sure how to approach it, maybe where his OWN value comes in.

Right, Kilops? You might be surprised when you two have a confab & get to actual real live prices of stuff. She may holler, "Eeeeek! No way!" Of course you want to give her the biggest & best. No matter how big & how expensive, there's always another one more so -- this from somebody who LIVES at the Sotheby's site. Your GF, if she's worth anything, will love whatever you get because -- as you said so rightly -- it's a symbol of your commitment. It's still only a thing. The commitment matters, the stuff honestly doesn't.

Iota's advice: "What I suggest is, besides talking about just the ring, is your future - your financial future. Decide where your priorities lie, and where you BOTH plan to use a very limited resource at this time (money)" is great. Getting married is a grown-up thing & works only if approached in a grown-up way, icky as the prospect is.

Bet she'll surprise you. Let us know after you talk to her -- I really want to know. I think you're trying & you're nice. Just young & learning -- nobody is born knowing all this!

--- Laurie

 

[minmin001]

thank you for the post. I really need a laugh today and it sure did the job~

 

[Black Jade]

Oops! Didn't understand at first that Cyclops--I mean Kliops--was a guy (dude?)
Now that I know, I have the solution!
He can wait to get engaged when he is older--to a way younger girl. By the time he is 90, he should have enough money to give an Anna Nicole Smith type an absolutely ENORMOUS diamond--and he'll be dead before she has wrinklesto accessorize it with.
Meanwhile, maybe he can wear sunshades or blinders or something to avoid the sight of us hags in diamonds and the old geezers tooling around in Ferraris. Poor thing.

 

[Kilops]

Your comments are so insightful. I am flattered on 2 accounts: 1) I would live till 90 and 2) I would be rich.
I am insulted by only 1 account: 1) I said I would not upgrade from an earlier reply unless she really wants to so it doesnt really matter how rich I would be in the future. It matters what she likes now and in the future.

Net Gain of 2 flatters and 1 insult = 1 flatter.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Your comments are so insightful. I am flattered on 2 accounts: 1) I would live till 90 and 2) I would be rich.
I am insulted by only 1 account: 1) I said I would not upgrade from an earlier reply unless she really wants to so it doesnt really matter how rich I would be in the future. It matters what she likes now and in the future.

Net Gain of 2 flatters and 1 insult = 1 flatter.

by then you need a TROPHY wife with wrinkle free hands...

 

[VapidLapid]

Your comments are so insightful. I am flattered on 2 accounts: 1) I would live till 90 and 2) I would be rich.
I am insulted by only 1 account: 1) I said I would not upgrade from an earlier reply unless she really wants to so it doesnt really matter how rich I would be in the future. It matters what she likes now and in the future.

Net Gain of 2 flatters and 1 insult = 1 flatter. [/quote]


Adjusted for inflated self-regard = priceless

 

[Farleysmom]

I really needed a good laugh today and this thread did the trick. Here I sit typing away with my almost 50 year old (wrinkled by some peoples opinion) hands, laughing as I type, blinded by the bling on my hands (cause my vision ain't what it used to be). Hmmmm.....must be why I needed bigger bling...just so I could see it. Now, if I could just get rid of the wrinkles on my aging backside and stop it looking like the back end of a rhino I'd be happy. In the grand scheme of things, who cares if my hands are a little older looking. It's just life's battle scars -- well earned and well deserved - JUST LIKE THE BIG BLING!!!!! LOL

Thanks for the chuckle today.

 

[tyty333]

What a weird notion, that younger women should have bigger diamonds because they have less wrinkles.

I'm 30, relatively unwrinkled, but I'll be gosh darned if I don't don't get bigger rocks when im old, haggard and have nothing better to do but stare at said rocks all day

Coz I would feel like I'd earned every little sparkle by then. I get great pleasure looking at the huge and beautiful rocks on the hands of our more mature PS members. Those are the ones that have great significance and represent a life lived and relationships nurtured over decades. An achievement.

And I would rather have a minuscule e-ring bought by my fiancé's hard-earned money, than a gigantic diamond bought by his daddy's cash. I think you'll find a lot of self-respecting women feel the same.

Rosetta - you said it so well. Buying your future daughter-in-law (or daughter) a diamond (honking or not) is wrong on so many
levels. The marriage is between your kid and their future spouse. They should buy what they can afford with their own
hard earned money. The thought of having an e-ring funded by my in-laws just gives me the creeps.

 

[lbbaber]

When your girl's hands are old a wrinkly, will you still allow her to wear a big diamond???

I know you are getting a hard time about this thread, and maybe your intentions weren't to sound so ageist and down right rude but please, go back and reread what you wrote. I don't think any amount of explaining can dig you out of that one.

Pricescope is a forum that tries extremely hard to be respectful of others. I am trying to laugh with you...I honestly am...but I am having a hard time seeing the humor in what you wrote and your backpeddling isn't much better.

I hope you decide to stick around PS because it is a valuable tool for those searching for quality bling at a reasonable price. But in the future, I would be careful of your wording. Good luck in your bling search!!

 

[yennyfire]

I really needed a good laugh today and this thread did the trick. Here I sit typing away with my almost 50 year old (wrinkled by some peoples opinion) hands, laughing as I type, blinded by the bling on my hands (cause my vision ain't what it used to be). Hmmmm.....must be why I needed bigger bling...just so I could see it. Now, if I could just get rid of the wrinkles on my aging backside and stop it looking like the back end of a rhino I'd be happy. In the grand scheme of things, who cares if my hands are a little older looking. It's just life's battle scars -- well earned and well deserved - JUST LIKE THE BIG BLING!!!!! LOL

Thanks for the chuckle today.

Oh my gosh Farleysmom, your post had me ROFL...so loudly that DH came out of his office to see what was so funny.

OP, I think that enough has been said about your post. I hope that you start a new post in RT so that you can get some direction from folks who really know what they're talking about when it comes to bling (and, if you read the replies to your post carefully, you've already realized that many of them know what they're talking about when it comes to what's important in life too!)

 

[luv2sparkle]

Arrogant whippersnapper. May you wrinkle prematurely and severely.

 

[slg47]

Yes, it is true. A lot of women get a larger diamond for an upgrade when they are OLDER because then they can afford it. I don't think Kilops's observation was wrong (although he seems to have ignored several rings on PS...yssie and frankie come to mind...) but perhaps the way he worded it was...poor.

Anyway, OP: if you think you might upgrade, I would definitely recommend a vendor with a good upgrade policy. I would also discuss upgrades with your FI after you propose. I don't think it should be your decision to save the finances for the younger generation so your daughter in law can have a huge diamond!

also on a forum that mainly consists of older women with large diamonds, insulting them on your first post is probably not the best way to go! (from a young woman with a small by PS standards diamond)

 

[MyDiamondSparkles]

From my experience here on PS, I have noticed that theres a direct corrolation between the size of the diamonds people wear and the wrinkliness of the owner's hands. This is pretty sad as I find younger girls' hands compliment the larger diamonds better. Its just like when I see elderly people drive ferraris within the speed limit. It doesnt do the product's justice enough. Dont get me wrong, elderly people deserve and look good in the more expensive things but I just think it would look even better if younger folks had access to them as well.

Sorry, Kilops, I'm offended by your comment or I wouldn't ever say what I am about to say:

Perhaps your girlfriend will dump you for a wrinkly handed man, who drives his Ferrari at the speed limit and who can actually afford to buy her a larger diamond than you obviosuly can!

I'm so glad that stupid seems to "fit" better on younger people than it does on older and wiser people.

Hugs,
MDS

"People never notice my slightly wrinkled hands, because they are too busy looking at my HUGE rock of a diamond"

 

[Dancing Fire]

Kilops...don't let these wrinkly handed women get to your head. they are a little excited b/c it's unusual for them to see a new dude "new blood" on hangout forum.the sharks are circling around fresh meat...

 

[Guilty Pleasure]

Generally, the sky is blue.

Generally, the grass is green.

Generally, older people have more money than younger people.

Generally, older people have more wrinkles than younger people.

Generally, people with more money can afford larger diamonds.

Therefore, the sky is generally blue, the grass is generally green, and older people generally have wrinkly hands and larger diamonds.


I don't get the point of even posting this other than trolling.

 

[crown1]

From my experience here on PS, I have noticed that theres a direct corrolation between the size of the diamonds people wear and the wrinkliness of the owner's hands. This is pretty sad as I find younger girls' hands compliment the larger diamonds better. Its just like when I see elderly people drive ferraris within the speed limit. It doesnt do the product's justice enough. Dont get me wrong, elderly people deserve and look good in the more expensive things but I just think it would look even better if younger folks had access to them as well. [/quote

the saddest truth is that you felt the need to post such an unkind thing. it seems you are just trying to get some much needed attention. a much better approach, in my opinion, would have been to post that you regretted your inability to purchase a large diamond for your so's lovely hands.

everyone is young at one time, i hope you live to be 100 and that you never indulge in "things that should be for younger people".

 

[somethingshiny]

C'mon people.


People vary. Live and let live.

 

[MonkeyPie]

C'mon people.

People vary. Live and let live.

BWAHAHAHA.
Now here's hoping Kilops wises up before he posts again...or that his GF wises up.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

All I have to say is (and I apologize if it's already been said). If the OP thinks the hands around these parts are bad, then he should take a look at some of the feet!

 

[VapidLapid]

I think perhaps it is the weight of the large diamonds that pulls on the skin so making it loose and thus wrinkled. Therefore, if you want your gf to have a youngins hands when shes a old hag you shouldnt get her anything larger than 1/8 carat. Or chop her hands off and store them in a cryogenic display. Ah youth, free from the knowledge of the value of all of the stages of life. One day, if you are very, very lucky, you will take those old wrinkled hand in your old wrinkled hands, your heart will swell and you will think no hands were ever lovelier than these.

 

[iota15]

From my experience here on PS, I have noticed that theres a direct corrolation between the size of the diamonds people wear and the wrinkliness of the owner's hands. This is pretty sad as I find younger girls' hands compliment the larger diamonds better. Its just like when I see elderly people drive ferraris within the speed limit. It doesnt do the product's justice enough. Dont get me wrong, elderly people deserve and look good in the more expensive things but I just think it would look even better if younger folks had access to them as well. [/quote

the saddest truth is that you felt the need to post such an unkind thing. it seems you are just trying to get some much needed attention. a much better approach, in my opinion, would have been to post that you regretted your inability to purchase a large diamond for your so's lovely hands.

everyone is young at one time, i hope you live to be 100 and that you never indulge in "things that should be for younger people".

Killops - this thread made me laugh yesterday, and it's still making me chuckle today.

Now if it helps, my hands may be wrinkly but in all honesty (and sadly), I'm likely not all that much older than you.

The ageism of your post is akin to me saying this:

Lately, I've been noticing a lot of large diamonds on really young girls - not all young girls, mind you, but only ones who seem to be trying really hard to impress people. I don't think large diamonds suit young girls at all. I find it pretty sad that they and their fiance's don't have the good sense to buy what they can afford, given all the other important financial milestones they have over the next few years. Instead, they are yanking out most of their savings or using credit to buy a luxury item. Don't get me wrong, I like young whippersnappers. I just think they all need a good knock on their heads if they think dumping their savings on a rock is a remotely good idea. A large stone on a young girl just makes her and her fiance look foolish.


(Of course, this isn't my opinion).

 

[Black Jade]

Has Cyclops gone away now--or is he just being quiet while he's working on getting his foot (or hoof, as the case may be) out of his mouth?

I was so offended by the premises behind his post (summed up so well by Circe a while back) that I didn't feel like mentioning right away that although I am fifty-four, I actually do not have wrinkled hands or wrinkled anything quite yet. It is not an inescapable fact that all women who hit their fifties (the age when you usually are able to afford more bling, if you're successful) necessarily have wrinkles. HOWEVER, WHY is a big deal whether we do or we don't? Is someone like me (a little genetically blessed and also kept away from the sun in youth by a wise grandmother) BETTER in some way than someone else my age who has a few wrinkles (which I know I will be getting in a few years, unless someone who thinks like Kliops decides that it's ethical to euthanize me?) Why do we make a big, big fuss about women who look even a little younger than their age as if they did something VIRTUOUS and worthy of praise and why is "you look so young' the ultimate compliment for a woman? What about actual achievements (which, in my opinion anyway, looking good is NOT an achievement. It's either pure, dumb luck--genetical lottery--or thinking WAY too much about such things and spending way too much time and money concentrating on something than no man would waste ten minutes thinking about.) I read once somewhere that if every woman in the United States were to magically wake up and think that she looked just fine as she was, the economy would grind completely to a halt, it is based so much on selling women things they don't need, and fostering their insecurity to make them think they need all these things to look 'good'--the be-all and end all of EVERYTHING. Why don't we give women praise for raising healthy children who are decent citizens and educating them and nourishing them and teaching them morals; making homes that are a pleasant environment for those who live in them PLUS all the other things so many women do now in terms of making scientific discoveries, breaking athletics records, added to the knowledge of history, law, economics, etc. etc. (all while being underpaid compared to men, by the way AND being told whatever life choice they make is inferior to whatever life choice they didn't). Beautiful young women with completely unwrinkled skins (and no stretch marks, and perky bosoms) have POTENTIAL to have these accomplishments eventually--but they haven't had the TIME to manage it yet. Why is it that when they HAVE had the time, and have accomplished amazing things, some little idiot like Cyclops feels that he has the right to tell them that they don't deserve the beautiful things that they can now afford, because HE doesn't think they look good enough any more? Who is he to even dare to have an opinion about this?

Cyclops, if I knew your fiancee, I would tell her to run away from you very fast and very far.
But you ARE young; and you do have time to learn better (and I hope you do, because I am basically a nice person, and I do thinks it's possible.)

 

[dragonfly411]

Generally, the sky is blue.

Generally, the grass is green.

Generally, older people have more money than younger people.

Generally, older people have more wrinkles than younger people.

Generally, people with more money can afford larger diamonds.

Therefore, the sky is generally blue, the grass is generally green, and older people generally have wrinkly hands and larger diamonds.


I don't get the point of even posting this other than trolling.

LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!

 

[MonkeyPie]

Lately, I've been noticing a lot of large diamonds on really young girls - not all young girls, mind you, but only ones who seem to be trying really hard to impress people. I don't think large diamonds suit young girls at all. I find it pretty sad that they and their fiance's don't have the good sense to buy what they can afford, given all the other important financial milestones they have over the next few years. Instead, they are yanking out most of their savings or using credit to buy a luxury item. Don't get me wrong, I like young whippersnappers. I just think they all need a good knock on their heads if they think dumping their savings on a rock is a remotely good idea. A large stone on a young girl just makes her and her fiance look foolish.

THIS!