Somebody Please Explain This To Me

[AdiS]

I'm rather slim and I wear an E cup. Years ago I learned that it doesn't matter how I was dressed - shirts, jackets or simple tops, men would always stare. I have never felt particularly flattered by being oggled. I just learned not to give a damn.

I love my bust and I like the way it looks in lower cut tops. I will make absolutely no excuses for that - that it's just the way fashion is, that it's hard for me to find more conservative clothes and having big breasts is such a hardship. I like myself when I'm looking moderately sexy - nothing too revealing, but nothing completely hiding what I have, either.

Do I dress in order to get male attention? Hah. Whatever might be going on in their heads is something I take no interest in, as long as they keep it to themselves. Which they do. Nothing in my personality encourages men to make inappropriate comments or behave in a less than civilized manner. If they want to stare covertly - that's their problem. Anything other than that will not be tolerated.

 

[Dancing Fire]

I have D's and I specifically wear low cut shirts the day after the old fuddy duddy pisses me off about something.

"Revenge Boobies!" LOL!

This made me laugh out loud

ETA: Where's DF now that we have a picture? Actually I think hers are gross. In that particular photo they make me think of skin-covered basketballs. Ick!

but they aren't real...

 

[slg47]

I was thinking about this topic today, and, as it happens, I went swimsuit shopping. Guess what? I'm up 2 sizes. Without gaining any weight, I skipped go, did not collect $200, and went directly to F, on a 32 band size. I will now have even more fun trying to find things that don't make me look like a **** star during business hours(not that I have anything against **** stars - more that impersonating one on a college campus would be awkward). In my off-time? I wear the pretty shiny vintage-y things that make me happy, and that do not cost me an arm and a leg.

Look, I have safety pins. Double-sided tape. Dickeys. A collection of fetching scarves, necklaces, and bits of lace. And, at the end of the day, you know what? It doesn't matter. Like Jessica Rabbit, I'm not bad: I'm just drawn that way. And, with the passage of the years, I've sort of grown to accept it.

I'm a body-positive HAES feminist. I do not believe that a woman's dress is any excuse to assault her, any reason to disrespect her, or any cause to demean her. I think that the people who engage in such activities? Are saying a lot more about themselves than they are about the women in question, be their clothing 30, 60, 0r 90% off.

(By the way: try finding attractive professional clothing for women with hourglass figures these days. I dare you. I double dog dare you. And I can tell you off the bat, your best bet will be - of all places - Brooks Brothers, where I got my interview suit for just under 1K. If you're on a budget, and/or just can't spend that every single day? You, too, will have to invest in double-sided tape and a good tailor. Or, you know, dress unattractively and take what some people call the Dog Tax ... or come to terms with your body. Your choice.)

You know what actually fills my heart with glee? Seeing my young female students wearing clothes that flatter them. I look at those girls, in their micro-minis and their v-necks, with their brilliant insights and their rapier wit, and I think, how wonderful! You are confident in yourselves all the way through, without any of this nonsensical bodily shame. Good on you! One of these days, I'll get to the same exact point. Till then, I have my dickeys.

I have similar proportions and agree that it is difficult to find clothing. As a side note...have you tried Freya or Fantasie for swimsuits?

 

[Dancing Fire]

we need a swimsuit contest...

 

[HollyS]

we need a swimsuit contest...

Okay. You first.

 

[Laila619]

You know what actually fills my heart with glee? Seeing my young female students wearing clothes that flatter them. I look at those girls, in their micro-minis and their v-necks, with their brilliant insights and their rapier wit, and I think, how wonderful! You are confident in yourselves all the way through, without any of this nonsensical bodily shame. Good on you! One of these days, I'll get to the same exact point. Till then, I have my dickeys.

Circe, I don't think you meant to imply this at all, but women who choose to keep themselves covered up don't necessarily have bodily shame, nor are they not confident. In fact, they might be very confident and comfortable in their own skin.

As far as the topic, exposed cleavage doesn't bother me one way or the other, except on young girls. In Victorian times even, ball gowns were cut very low.

 

[Circe]

You know what actually fills my heart with glee? Seeing my young female students wearing clothes that flatter them. I look at those girls, in their micro-minis and their v-necks, with their brilliant insights and their rapier wit, and I think, how wonderful! You are confident in yourselves all the way through, without any of this nonsensical bodily shame. Good on you! One of these days, I'll get to the same exact point. Till then, I have my dickeys.

Circe, I don't think you meant to imply this at all, but women who choose to keep themselves covered up don't necessarily have bodily shame, nor are they not confident. In fact, they might be very confident and comfortable in their own skin.

As far as the topic, exposed cleavage doesn't bother me one way or the other, except on young girls. In Victorian times even, ball gowns were cut very low.

Thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt! I definitely didn't mean to imply that. The phrasing was mostly a reaction against some of the earlier commentary in the thread. I do think that a little bit of cultural internalization can occur, though: I'm happy with my body and don't attach any onus to low-cut tops or short skirts myself ... but I do sometimes have the little voice in my head that says, "Other people will think this means I'm seeking attention inappropriate to the setting." I suppose I'm glad to see that fading a little in the next generation ....

 

[Laila619]

You know what actually fills my heart with glee? Seeing my young female students wearing clothes that flatter them. I look at those girls, in their micro-minis and their v-necks, with their brilliant insights and their rapier wit, and I think, how wonderful! You are confident in yourselves all the way through, without any of this nonsensical bodily shame. Good on you! One of these days, I'll get to the same exact point. Till then, I have my dickeys.

Circe, I don't think you meant to imply this at all, but women who choose to keep themselves covered up don't necessarily have bodily shame, nor are they not confident. In fact, they might be very confident and comfortable in their own skin.

As far as the topic, exposed cleavage doesn't bother me one way or the other, except on young girls. In Victorian times even, ball gowns were cut very low.

Thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt! I definitely didn't mean to imply that. The phrasing was mostly a reaction against some of the earlier commentary in the thread. I do think that a little bit of cultural internalization can occur, though: I'm happy with my body and don't attach any onus to low-cut tops or short skirts myself ... but I do sometimes have the little voice in my head that says, "Other people will think this means I'm seeking attention inappropriate to the setting." I suppose I'm glad to see that fading a little in the next generation ....

I always love your articulate and thought-provoking posts, Circe!