Seeking advice on how to choose an engagement ring for life

[catou]

Hi everyone,
Long-time lurker of this wonderful site and community.

My bf of two years and I are going to take the plunge and get married. This would be a second marriage for me, first for him. My engagement ring from first marriage was lovely- a one carat E xxx round brilliant on a simple platinum band from a well known "high end" local jeweller. It was great for me then because I was young, I wasn't really big on jewelry and didn't really know my tastes. I am a simple person fashion wise and classic in my tastes- I'm a corporate suit Monday's through Friday's and laid-back, jeans and tshirt on weekends and on vacation. No fussy colours save the odd pop of color. This time around, I want an engagement ring with some oomph, something that looks like it suits my personality. But I also want it to be timeless so I don't wind up with something than can easily be dated.

I have been looking at various styles and tried on many, seen several on the internet I can't try on in person and can't find remotely similar - and I am having a hard time deciding! I started knowing I wanted nothing like my first one, because the marriage ended badly. "Perfect" Tiffany style solitaires with perfect round stones leave me cold as a result. Right now I'm just wondering what suits me best, and since I don't have a huge personal collection to draw inspiration from, I am at a crossroads. I don't want to do an upgrade in the future. At best maybe I will reset it in 20 years to change.

I also began considering a five stone anniversary ring as an engagement ring. I've settled on the wedding band to be a Tiffany milgrain two tone, to match his.

Without further ado, these are the styles I've narrowed it down to- as you can see, they vary greatly from one another. I wonder if my choices are trendy, and I wonder if I'm crazy- I adored a halo on an emerald cut, hated it with a cushion. I wear both gold and white metals equally well. I love the sunny, golden aesthetic of Single Stone's designs (the Sydnee setting being my favourite), but I also love Edwardian antiques, which introduced me to the chunky gorgeousness of old mine and antique cushions. I also love the clean classic lines of the Tiffany Soleste. I tried one on at Tiffany and I immediately felt girly and "princessy". But I fell hard in love with photos of old mine and antique cushions, and would love an August vintage stone. So my question is, how do you know which is The One?

Thanks

 

[Tophat1]

They are all gorgeous!

My opinion: I think the most timeless from your list of likes will be the old style cuts (AVR or AVC) and non-halo

Do you have a budget in mind?

Did round or square/rectangle speak to you more when you tried on rings? I was adamant I wanted a cushion but once I tried one on, it just didn't look right on my hand. Rounds suit me way better!

 

[catou]

Rounds are a no for me. Emeralds and slightly elongated cushions speak to me. Budget is about $7500 usd (the Canadian exchange rate is to our disadvantage unfortunately so will need to settle for smaller and/or not custom made. Oh and add our sales taxes of about 15% to that total amount). I'm Ok with warmer diamonds for the cushions but again, never seen an AVC in person, so I will definitely need some help stone hunting! . Im hovering at around 7mm size for a cushion, so I'm guessing a 1.5 ct weight.

I'm sensitive to colour and H colour on an emerald looked too warm to me. Truthfully, actual warm diamonds are tough to come by here. I've never seen warmer than an I before. Jewellers here don't seem to carry anything beyond white gold, halo, standard rounds and princesses. I've gotten pushback from my jeweller on using yellow gold and another one outright told me he's never done rose gold before- ever. And this is an experienced person in the business a good forty years! I have some modern cushions in a three stone sapphire ring I had made recently which look great for that particular setting, but to have that in an engagement ring doesn't look right to my eye. Chunky pastel flashes are what got me!

 

[Tophat1]

I love warmer colors in chunky cuts!

Have you looked at options at jewelsbygrace?

There's also an AVC in the pre-owned section. It's a bit more than your budget though

https://www.pricescope.com/communit...n-custom-vatche-platinum-double-prong.228528/

 

[LLJsmom]

I have loved the Sydnee for years. If you look at my old posts I tried it on in 2014 wanted it back then. It is a wonderful solitaire setting. Just a word of caution. If your budget is $7500, the setting alone, not including tax, will Eat up 77% of your budget. I have asked within the past couple of months. If you get the whole ring from them you may be able to work something out with them. maybe try calling and tell them your budget. But one thing. A smaller stone may not be able accommodate all the designs that are the basket of a sydnee. I have tried it on with a 3.5 and a 1.5 stone. Good luck!!

 

[SimoneDi]

Hi there and congrats on your upcoming engagement! It is good that over the years you have learned what speaks most to you and I can completely understand wanting to move away from a ring style that was associated with a previous marriage. When I saw your inspiration pics and your budget, I immediately thought of this stone: https://loupetroop.com/listings/loo...ra-antique-cushion-needs-to-go-asap-pice-drop

I realize that you said that colors below H look "warm" to you, but I would seriously consider this one. It is way below retail and it has a wonderful size at over 1.5ct! Alternatively, you can look at GOGs and VCs inventories to see what other options are available, but be prepared that your budget might not stretch to a 1.5ct precision cut diamond.

You can also look at jewels by grace and love affair diamonds for old mine and old European cuts.

Good luck!

 

[Tophat1]

Hi there and congrats on your upcoming engagement! It is good that over the years you have learned what speaks most to you and I can completely understand wanting to move away from a ring style that was associated with a previous marriage. When I saw your inspiration pics and your budget, I immediately thought of this stone: https://loupetroop.com/listings/loo...ra-antique-cushion-needs-to-go-asap-pice-drop

I realize that you said that colors below H look "warm" to you, but I would seriously consider this one. It is way below retail and it has a wonderful size at over 1.5ct! Alternatively, you can look at GOGs and VCs inventories to see what other options are available, but be prepared that your budget might not stretch to a 1.5ct precision cut diamond.

You can also look at jewels by grace and love affair diamonds for old mine and old European cuts.

Good luck!

That stone is seriously gorgeous and great value!!

 

[valeria101]

Emeralds and slightly elongated cushions speak to me ... I've never seen warmer than an I before.

WWW

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I love both emerald cuts and antique cushions (AVCs or CACs). I think either of those would be outstanding, timeless and totally different than a round brilliant, which you want to avoid. I like the antique cushions better as a solitaire and emerald cuts better in a halo unless they are over 2 cts. I think H-I is an excellent color range for either.

Caysie van Bebber (CVB Inspired Design) makes gorgeous solitaire settings that people who like Singlestone would like. Some pics are on Facebook (CVB Inspired Design).

And here:
https://www.etsy.com/shop/CVBinspiredDesign?ref=l2-shopheader-name

https://www.pricescope.com/communit...b-eye-candy-thread.211825/page-9#post-4180861

 

[soxfan]

http://www.jewelsbygrace.com/2-05ct-antique-cushion-cut-diamond-rose-gold-halo-gia-q-r-vvs2

 

[AprilBaby]

That halo by grace is to die for!!!!

 

[foxinsox]

tyty's suggestion of getting some test rings is a great one! There's also an app called Beaumade that has a lot of different styles you can "try" on a photo of your hand and get a sense of whether what you like looks right if you don't have a lot of choice around where you live. I'm pondering a reset for my ering and it's been really handy to visualise how things could look

 

[pearaffair]

I'm just going to throw it out there that the OP's budget in USD is about $5500 USD.

You guys are finding some really stunning options but I hope we're not breaking OP's heart (or budget) because $7k USD is almost $10,000 Canadian dollars.... nearly double her stated budget. Just sayin'

 

[Tophat1]

OP said her budget was $7500 *USD*

 

[pearaffair]

Do I get to blame this on pregnancy brain?? Oh man I am so sorry for my confusion! Ignore me!

I love the rose gold haloed antique cushion that JBG has. Hope OP finds something lovely! Some great options have been posted!!

 

[Tophat1]

Do I get to blame this on pregnancy brain?? Oh man I am so sorry for my confusion! Ignore me!

I love the rose gold haloed antique cushion that JBG has. Hope OP finds something lovely! Some great options have been posted!!

Of course! And you were just looking out for another PSer!

 

[SimoneDi]

I totally missed the memo on a five stone engagement ring! Yes, yes! (Unless you go with the CAC I suggested or something similar in terms of e-ring) I do love five stone rings and I think that they are very classy, vey blingy and look amazing as a standalone ring! I would probably see what is the most your money can buy and try to go for 40pts each. I would use BGD, WF or IDJ for the project if you decide to go that route.

 

[pearaffair]

OP said her budget was $7500 *USD*

Of course! And you were just looking out for another PSer!

Thanks for being so understanding

OP - I can't wait to see what you choose! Congrats on your impending engagement!

 

[marcy]

I like all of the options you posted as well as some of the suggestions. A 5 stone rings looks very classic and elegant. I notice you said you fell in love with AVC, elongated cushions and OMC so IMO that is what I'd look at first. As so many mentioned it's hard to tell until you can try some one to see what you like on your hand.

 

[catou]

I think if you want classic then you should stick with some sort of solitaire. IMO old stones never go out of style. I wish you could
get somewhere where you could try some on. Beyond that, I would work with someone that has a good return policy so if the stone
is not for you, you can return it. I know its not that easy to return stones from Canada.

Emeralds are also pretty classic. I too would stay away from halos if you are looking for more timeless (not that they're going anywhere anytime soon).

You might try looking on etsy to see if they have any CZ rings in emerald cuts or OEC that you could order and wear around for a while to see what you
think might suit you more.
https://www.etsy.com/listing/286668825/emerald-cut-ring-engagement-ring?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=emerald cut cz&ref=sr_gallery_2 way bigger than you need
https://www.etsy.com/listing/528169021/cubic-zirconia-emerald-cut-post-earrings?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=emerald cut cz&ref=sr_gallery_39 earring that you can play with
https://www.etsy.com/listing/221814548/26-cttw-sterling-silver-emerald-cut-halo?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=emerald cut cz&ref=sr_gallery_45 haloed emerald

https://www.etsy.com/listing/488060158/custom-old-mine-cut-moissanite-omc?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=Old european cushion&ref=sr_gallery_12 not too elongated
https://www.etsy.com/listing/497422094/antique-cushion-moissanite-env?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=Old european cushion&ref=sr_gallery_37 pretty but probably
more than you want to spend for a "test" stone

Edit...this is an asscher but would probably give you that emerald feel
https://loupetroop.com/listings/loose-stones/new-loose-asscher-moissanite

...and therein lies the issue, tyty. I ordered a cheap CZ emerald cut on a simple band and I do like it, but I feel I may need to go for size for an emerald for me to be happy with it. And size has to come at the cost of clarity or colour. Back to the drawing board for me. The halo makes it pretty to me. Again I must be crazy because I absolutely don't tolerate halos on any other shape, even my preferred ones! I think it brings the right amount of femininity to the masculine rectangular cut. I think that is why that style speaks to me. And truthfully, this would absolutely be the easiest one to have made here. The Tiffany I tried on was a touch over 1 carat centre stone and it was plenty large enough for my smallish hand.

The moissanite cushions in the size I am looking at are expensive just to try out. Also I'd hate to buy one only to have to spend another couple of hundreds of dollars to set it, and then decide it isn't for me.

 

[catou]

I have loved the Sydnee for years. If you look at my old posts I tried it on in 2014 wanted it back then. It is a wonderful solitaire setting. Just a word of caution. If your budget is $7500, the setting alone, not including tax, will Eat up 77% of your budget. I have asked within the past couple of months. If you get the whole ring from them you may be able to work something out with them. maybe try calling and tell them your budget. But one thing. A smaller stone may not be able accommodate all the designs that are the basket of a sydnee. I have tried it on with a 3.5 and a 1.5 stone. Good luck!!

Thank you LLJMom!
I actually had reached out to Single Stone and sure enough, it is outside our budget- which in retrospect I thought was plenty! They sent me a photo with a lovely 1.30 carat old cushion cut, J colour, and it looked like the perfect size. And I had considered biting the bullet and doing it. But what if I don't like it on my hand? No returns allowed. So I started contemplating perhaps a larger-stoned eternity band as an option. I continue to vacillate between having a simple eternity band in interesting cuts like French cuts in yellow gold, to make it unique, and then hold out for a great solitaire as an anniversary gift.

I guess the difficulty I am having is actually NARROWING IT DOWN TO ONE CHOICE. PS spoils you for options, which makes it harder to commit to one style!

 

[catou]

I love warmer colors in chunky cuts!

Have you looked at options at jewelsbygrace?

There's also an AVC in the pre-owned section. It's a bit more than your budget though

https://www.pricescope.com/communit...n-custom-vatche-platinum-double-prong.228528/

I reached out to the owner. thank you!

 

[catou]

Hi there and congrats on your upcoming engagement! It is good that over the years you have learned what speaks most to you and I can completely understand wanting to move away from a ring style that was associated with a previous marriage. When I saw your inspiration pics and your budget, I immediately thought of this stone: https://loupetroop.com/listings/loo...ra-antique-cushion-needs-to-go-asap-pice-drop

I realize that you said that colors below H look "warm" to you, but I would seriously consider this one. It is way below retail and it has a wonderful size at over 1.5ct! Alternatively, you can look at GOGs and VCs inventories to see what other options are available, but be prepared that your budget might not stretch to a 1.5ct precision cut diamond.

You can also look at jewels by grace and love affair diamonds for old mine and old European cuts.

Good luck!

Thank you for pointing this one out! Maybe if I went for a super simple setting it would work with my budget (more or less). I am actually ok with warmer coloured antique cushions, as I'd like the "ivory" colour on a yellow gold setting. It's with emeralds that I am picky on color. Turns out I am picky with clarity on emeralds, too. I visited a local jewelry store on a stroll yesterday, where he showed me a nice F colour stone with Vs1 clarity and I saw the inclusions two feet away from my eyes. :-s I am thinking warm coloured cushion is the way to go more and more.

I have also been looking at Jewels by Grace, Old World Diamonds and Love Affair Diamonds obsessively over the past few months. I may bite the bullet and order something from these places and return it quickly if they wind up not working for me.

 

[catou]

tyty's suggestion of getting some test rings is a great one! There's also an app called Beaumade that has a lot of different styles you can "try" on a photo of your hand and get a sense of whether what you like looks right if you don't have a lot of choice around where you live. I'm pondering a reset for my ering and it's been really handy to visualise how things could look

I think I tried every single option on Beaumade!! LOL

Thank you all for the great suggestions! I feel great knowing that my bases are covered!!

 

[catou]

Of course! And you were just looking out for another PSer!

Either way, the fact that $10,000 isn't stretching out as much as I had hoped is also kinda breaking my heart ! LOL
I know. First world problems.

 

[AVC4Me]

Hi Catou, I saw your inquiry...see LT for more info on the AVC and contact info!

 

[mrs-b]

Hi Catou -

That Loupetroop stone is an AWESOME deal, and Victor Canera's stones are top class and very, very beautiful.

Singlestone's prices are massively expensive in my opinion, but a solitaire of that nature with similar elements would be very easy to create. Try David Klass in LA (VERY popular jeweler on these boards who does awesome work) and ask to have something made by his uber-bench, whose work is incredible.

To get something noticeably more oomph-y than your original e-ring you'll need something in the 1.5ct range, so definitely check out that VC stone on Loupetroop - I've seen his stones in person many times, and that stone for 7k is an amazing deal for a stunning stone.

Good luck!

 

[Funion]

Hi Catou!
I feel the need to chime in since you listed a photo of my AVC for you inspiration!
I too had difficulty deciding on my upgrade from a MRB, but when I saw the AVC I immediately knew it was for me. I agree that you need to see as many stones in person as possible and don't worry you will absolutely KNOW the one when you see it!

P.S. The loupetroop stone looks like heaven, keep us posted.

 

[totallyfree]

I have a 1.6c antique cushion from Adam at Old World Diamonds - he was super easy to work with and I would highly encourage you to reach out with your specs/budget and see what he can do.

Likewise, Grace, Diamonds by Lauren and Good Old Gold were all very helpful during my search. The only reason I finalised my sale with OWD was that this ring was posted online - rose gold, eagle/double claws at exactly our budget - meant to be!!

Keep in mind that an antique or 'chunky' cushion cut will face up smaller, at 1.6c I think mine is 6.2mm. Sometimes I wish I'd gone for a slightly better cut stone (being a little bigger across), but I was pretty eager to get a ring!

Good luck

 

[catou]

Hi everyone,

Thought I'd post a quick update but I called and emailed a few vendors and bumped up my budget a bit and I think I found the perfect stone! I opted for an actual antique diamond in lieu of an AVC, and decided on a rose or yellow gold setting. Just trying to figure out a solitaire setting that isn't boring and stays classic and modern at the same time. What are your thoughts on a warm antique cushion with a brushed satin rose gold setting with 4 prongs? Ought to stand the test of time, no, and I can "update" it with stackers.