Refurb gone really wrong - what to do?

[Dreamer_D]

YUURG!!

Well, small consolation, but I think this thread has education value for so many PSers. If you have a vintage mount, it is often better to leave it alone than try to fix it. Seems it can go south very easily. Second, no second chances.

I am hoping for an quick and painless resolution now.

And yummy ruby band!

I would just add to this, but if you do need to fix a vintage mount, get an expert to do it because you can be certain that it takes someone who has proven that they can make fine vintage mounts to do it.

I have learned the "no second chances" from experience. If something isn't done to my satisfaction the first time, such as prongs, it doesn't go back to the person who couldn't do it right in the first place. It goes to someone I am 100% sure can do it right.

Guys, while I certainly agree with both of these points ... here's the bit that is frustrating and making me feel this might be a little ... I don't, like when people assert that what you have to do to avoid X terrible fate is Y, when the truth is, sometimes it's just crappy luck.

They ARE experts who have proven they can make fine vintage mounts. Loads of people here have had grand experiences with them. There is just apparently some kind of cloud hanging over this particular meeting of craftsman and ring. And that, inasmuch as anything else, is what is so frustrating to me.

That does suck. I also have been dismayed on more than one occassion by the craftmanship of a jeweler who in the past was spot on. So lesson 3: Sometimes bad things just happen!

And to be clear, I also was not trying to "nanny nanny boo boo" you and make it look like you should have done differently. I am just trying to summarize and perhaps lurkers can draw some lesson from this sticky butt experience!

 

[Circe]

Hi Circe,
I'm so sorry about your ring. I just wanted to say that I admire your kind and forgiving nature. you trusted in the relationship you have with this jeweler and gave them the chance to make it right. And even though it hasn't gone the way you wanted and has taken far longer than you hoped you still opted not to publicly call them out and vent your frustration. You have been far more understanding than I would have been in your shoes. I would have been far too emotional and would have just wanted to start over with someone new. I really hope they can make the repairs to your satisfaction and that your gorgeous ring is back on your finger very soon.

Thanks, Hospatogi. I certainly don't FEEL very kind and forgiving right now! Though - and I never say this, but, seriously, LOL - you sound exactly like my therapist. Which is probably TMI ... but the last time I saw her and was whinging about this (weeks ago, which says something), she was like "Mmm-hm. So the bench had to go to the doctor the day you saw him, and your rep was screwed in the snow-storm, and all god's chirrun got problems, but ... you just spent, like, 15 minutes beating yourself up for this, so where's the anger at the people responsible?"

I just kind of blinked at her.

It's a valid point. I didn't want to be in that awkward place of half-venting, half-blackmailing the jeweler to do right OR ELSE - which is not, btw, me judging anybody else who'd been here, because, a) every situation is different, and, b) most of the ones that fall into this category suck royally. And, as weird as it sounds, I really did like the rep - maybe some people are just awesomely charismatic, or maybe some people like jewelry and weird things the same way I do, but I'd feel ... bad ... about endangering their job, just because the bench misunderstood. And the bench, though kind of the sort of fellow one might want to compare to a portion of the anatomy found in the trousers region (screwed up my ring TWICE) is still an older gentleman whom I wouldn't want to get fired. Though, believe me, I ever see anybody on here talking about wanting this sort of work, I will be gently steering them elsewheres.

I kind of figure, they're still in the grey area of trying to do right. If they fix it - a month and a hell of a lot of agita later - I figure they've actually done their best, I feel okay knowing they'll do their best by future customers, and will hopefully, maybe, have learned from this and do a better best. And if the third try is not the charm? ... I will write the most even-tempered, open-handed, acknowledging-the-fact-that-jewelers-generally-prefer-to-sell-you-their-stuff-to-fixing-vintage-iest review I can.

And then write another one about OWD, or my custom guy, or whoever the hell else actually fixes the damned thing. Fingers crossed, though - just checked my e-mail and am told a deadline of the 15th is deemed feasible for the third try. CROSS YOUR FINGERS AND TOES, GUYS.

 

[Circe]

YUURG!!

Well, small consolation, but I think this thread has education value for so many PSers. If you have a vintage mount, it is often better to leave it alone than try to fix it. Seems it can go south very easily. Second, no second chances.

I am hoping for an quick and painless resolution now.

And yummy ruby band!

I would just add to this, but if you do need to fix a vintage mount, get an expert to do it because you can be certain that it takes someone who has proven that they can make fine vintage mounts to do it.

I have learned the "no second chances" from experience. If something isn't done to my satisfaction the first time, such as prongs, it doesn't go back to the person who couldn't do it right in the first place. It goes to someone I am 100% sure can do it right.

Guys, while I certainly agree with both of these points ... here's the bit that is frustrating and making me feel this might be a little ... I don't, like when people assert that what you have to do to avoid X terrible fate is Y, when the truth is, sometimes it's just crappy luck.

They ARE experts who have proven they can make fine vintage mounts. Loads of people here have had grand experiences with them. There is just apparently some kind of cloud hanging over this particular meeting of craftsman and ring. And that, inasmuch as anything else, is what is so frustrating to me.

That does suck. I also have been dismayed on more than one occassion by the craftmanship of a jeweler who in the past was spot on. So lesson 3: Sometimes bad things just happen!

And to be clear, I also was not trying to "nanny nanny boo boo" you and make it look like you should have done differently. I am just trying to summarize and perhaps lurkers can draw some lesson from this sticky butt experience!

Thanks, Dreamer - I know!

All my own butt-hurt about the unfairness of the universe aside, though, that's the bit I wanted to emphasize - that this crap can happen to anybody, no matter how carefully they select their jeweler, and that the important part is how to deal with it after. Sometimes, it seems like it'll be less hassle to just let the jeweler fix their own work - odds are, it won't. When it has for me in the past, well ... they've been long-term family friends. I think that skewed my perspective, here.

This will probably win up costing me less, financially. But I've spent a damn month tied up in knots about it. I think that if I'd - as the obnoxious saying goes - played hardball, walked away from the first meeting and said, "Mm-hm. Right. I'm taking this to my custom jeweler and sending you the bill," it would have evened out in the end, and I wouldn't have felt so helpless.

Given this experience, my advice is that even if they are the reincarnation of Leonardo da Vinci? Walk away. It will probably cause you less agita in the end. Bottom line is, you guys are RIGHT ... but I just want to emphasize that it applies at all stages, if you see what I mean.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Circe, you are hilarious, even though you may not be feeling like it! (mainly referring to your reply to Hospatogi!)

 

[Dreamer_D]

Given this experience, my advice is that even if they are the reincarnation of Leonardo da Vinci? Walk away. It will probably cause you less agita in the end. Bottom line is, you guys are RIGHT ... but I just want to emphasize that it applies at all stages, if you see what I mean.

yes yes yes! This is exactly what I was trying to say! You can have a great relationship with a jeweler and it can go wrong at some point either through miscommunication or through finding the chink in their skill set. At that point.. I dunno. Jump off a bridge

 

[Hospatogi]

Hi Circe,
I'm so sorry about your ring. I just wanted to say that I admire your kind and forgiving nature. you trusted in the relationship you have with this jeweler and gave them the chance to make it right. And even though it hasn't gone the way you wanted and has taken far longer than you hoped you still opted not to publicly call them out and vent your frustration. You have been far more understanding than I would have been in your shoes. I would have been far too emotional and would have just wanted to start over with someone new. I really hope they can make the repairs to your satisfaction and that your gorgeous ring is back on your finger very soon.

Thanks, Hospatogi. I certainly don't FEEL very kind and forgiving right now! Though - and I never say this, but, seriously, LOL - you sound exactly like my therapist. Which is probably TMI ... but the last time I saw her and was whinging about this (weeks ago, which says something), she was like "Mmm-hm. So the bench had to go to the doctor the day you saw him, and your rep was screwed in the snow-storm, and all god's chirrun got problems, but ... you just spent, like, 15 minutes beating yourself up for this, so where's the anger at the people responsible?"

I just kind of blinked at her.

It's a valid point. I didn't want to be in that awkward place of half-venting, half-blackmailing the jeweler to do right OR ELSE - which is not, btw, me judging anybody else who'd been here, because, a) every situation is different, and, b) most of the ones that fall into this category suck royally. And, as weird as it sounds, I really did like the rep - maybe some people are just awesomely charismatic, or maybe some people like jewelry and weird things the same way I do, but I'd feel ... bad ... about endangering their job, just because the bench misunderstood. And the bench, though kind of the sort of fellow one might want to compare to a portion of the anatomy found in the trousers region (screwed up my ring TWICE) is still an older gentleman whom I wouldn't want to get fired. Though, believe me, I ever see anybody on here talking about wanting this sort of work, I will be gently steering them elsewheres.

I kind of figure, they're still in the grey area of trying to do right. If they fix it - a month and a hell of a lot of agita later - I figure they've actually done their best, I feel okay knowing they'll do their best by future customers, and will hopefully, maybe, have learned from this and do a better best. And if the third try is not the charm? ... I will write the most even-tempered, open-handed, acknowledging-the-fact-that-jewelers-generally-prefer-to-sell-you-their-stuff-to-fixing-vintage-iest review I can.

And then write another one about OWD, or my custom guy, or whoever the hell else actually fixes the damned thing. Fingers crossed, though - just checked my e-mail and am told a deadline of the 15th is deemed feasible for the third try. CROSS YOUR FINGERS AND TOES, GUYS.

Haha maybe I should consider a career change

 

[missy]

Circe, I'm just popping in to say I am thinking of you. All my fingers and toes are crossed!!! ***DUST***DUST***DUST***

 

[rosetta]

I missed the whole saga. I hope you the bench gets it right this time Circe!

And whoah, that is one beautiful ruby eternity!

 

[Circe]

IT'S BACK. I picked it up last night after work. I am delighted to say that the third time was the charm.

Somewhat ironically, though the proportions are great, the prongs are sound, and the general effect is just what I wanted ... the finish is so off, oy, vey. It looks like it's been done with steel wool. But I CAN LIVE WITH THAT, at least until the next time I see my custom guy or something, because damned if I am letting if off my finger for the forseeable future.

EDIT: Yes, that is a glass of champagne in the first picture, don't judge me. If this isn't worthy of a glass of bubbly ....

 

[ForteKitty]

Woohoo!!! It looks great, and I'm glad they finally got it right!!!

 

[Circe]

Those were my shots from last night: here's a couple in the cold light of day (and I do mean cold, as NY is sub-freaking-zero today).

ETA: Thanks, ForteKitty! I am DELIGHTED.

 

[Rockdiamond]

I haven't been through the whole thread- but I think the design looks great- not that I can see the details- but most of all glad that it's been does to your satisfaction and that you're happy!

I see a workbench behind you- what are you working on?
Making jewelry maybe?

 

[missy]

I am so happy for you Circe!!!! Your patience and grace paid off!
The ring looks beautiful.

 

[Circe]

Except. Um. Here's where the plot thickens. While I was depressedly trolling eBay for settings, just in case this whole thing continued to go south, I found the perfect setting. One of my dream designs. I figured I could use it to reset my original e-ring!

And then I got this guy back, and tried them on together, and thought ... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmm.

ETA: Hi, David! I hope the last shots give a l'il more detail - I cannot for the life of me figure out where my Olloclip is. And, heh, yeah, I'm an amateur silversmith - I popped the stone (random white zircon I had floating around) into the setting below so that I could wear it while I figured things out.

Son of ETA: Thank you Missy!!!

 

[bunnycat]

I'm so glad they got it done this time!

 

[Circe]

And here they are together, and hopefully the comparison shots will also give y'all a good idea of what the new setting looks like.

I am really happy they got it wearable for me. I DO NOT want to do anything big in the foreseeable future. But a tiny part of me is sort of like "Fate! Kismet! An age-appropriate actual antique!" because ... I dunno, I guess I'm in that odd phase where I keep eyeballing it and having little things (cough finish cough) catch my eye, and going back and forth on the amount of Frankensteining the poor thing has been through.

So, yeah. I just got it back, and already I'm wondering if I should reset it, because I am crazy.

If I do, though? SO going to OWD ....

ETA: Thank you, BastetCat!

 

[ForteKitty]

Would they be able to take out the inner bezel so your diamond can fit? What's in that setting right now?

Keep both?

 

[Circe]

Would they be able to take out the inner bezel so your diamond can fit? What's in that setting right now?

Keep both?

Oh, I'm keeping both - there was no way I could resist those little Gothic-looking gallery piercings. Right now the octagonal setting is housing a completely random stone, a white zircon I had bouncing around on my bench (and I do mean bouncing - you can probably see the abrasions). If I keep the anniversary ring together with its ... it feels weird to call it "original setting," but you know what I mean - I'm probably going to look around for that eye-visibly fluorescent stone of my dreams to set into it. This whole thing made me take another look at my original e-ring with its beautiful prongs and decide to NEVER EVER EVER mess with it.

If I do swap the anniversary stone into the new setting, I'll be keeping the original (especially after all this!) and look for a nice colored stone to set into it. I think they should be able to take out the inner ring, and use its supports for prongs and/or a new plate, whichever is sturdiest.

But, no rush on the decision ... I really am just SO HAPPY that it's all turned out well, and that I can wear it again.

 

[Rosebloom]

Yay for a fix!!! It looks great - such a stunning setting that its hard (for us) to see any finishing issues. The new setting is gorgeous too. Clearly the only solution is another diamond.

 

[TravelingGal]

Yay! Glad it turned out! And I gotta say..love that octagonal setting!

 

[Circe]

Yay for a fix!!! It looks great - such a stunning setting that its hard (for us) to see any finishing issues. The new setting is gorgeous too. Clearly the only solution is another diamond.

Thanks, Rosebloom! It really would be OCD of me to let that detract from my pleasure in having it back.

You know, I never "got" the whole naming-your-ring thing, probably because just naming my CATS was such a drag (I tried naming the last one Stuart Halpern-Fingerhut, after a TV producer, because, well, the guy always makes me laugh - both his writing and his, er, name - and I figured that's be a good quality for a cat, but it completely failed to take: eventually, we just named him after one of the Dukes of Hell ... believe me, it fits him). But I'm naming this one.

Because I've finally got my mojo back.

 

[tyty333]

Ah, relief! I think it looks fabulous! Why couldn't they do that in the first place?

I'm so happy for you Circe...I was afraid there was not going to be a happy ending. Nice to be wrong!

 

[distracts]

Yay! SO glad it is fixed now!

 

[GemFever]

That's a very pretty zircon in the gothic setting! Does it have an open culet?

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Much better!!!! Thank goodness!!!

I love the other setting, too! It will be fun to find a stone to fit it! Definitely keep that gorgeous double bezel!!!!

 

[Laila619]

It looks great, Circe!

 

[Mico]

I'm glad this all worked out!!! This is probably my worst nightmare, and the more I play in PS the more I am hesitating refurbishing my ring!

Thanks for the read!

 

[Rockdiamond]

Except. Um. Here's where the plot thickens. While I was depressedly trolling eBay for settings, just in case this whole thing continued to go south, I found the perfect setting. One of my dream designs. I figured I could use it to reset my original e-ring!

And then I got this guy back, and tried them on together, and thought ... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmm.

ETA: Hi, David! I hope the last shots give a l'il more detail - I cannot for the life of me figure out where my Olloclip is. And, heh, yeah, I'm an amateur silversmith - I popped the stone (random white zircon I had floating around) into the setting below so that I could wear it while I figured things out.

Son of ETA: Thank you Missy!!!

NIIICE!
Much better than some of the setters here on 47th street.
You've always got to think twice before giving your diamond to some guy called "Chip"


I am glad it worked out well- finally
Both rings looks sweet to me!
Mojo back.....git down!!!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Looks great! Finally.

But I gotta say -- rmeove those two inner bezels and then bead set your honker into your new mount! Add some fine milgrain... DIVINE!!! So low and smooth and protected, so practical. DO IIIITTT.

 

[junebug17]

I'm so happy Circe, the ring looks great!

And that's a pretty sweet little zircon you've got there! I actually really like the cut, and it looks like it has a culet.

And of course I adore your new setting!