Picking the Setting...Take 2

[rockysalamander]

I had the same problem on my phone earlier, but not my desk top. IDK.

 

[sledge]

Well between my connection and some other errands I had to run, I didn't get back to comment here as quickly as I had hoped. Good news is we were able to sit down and I was able to show her a bunch of stuff and get some feedback.

Before we get too far into this, thank you! All you have been wonderful to me, and I really appreciate you holding my hand and encouraging me through this process, even though I know it kind of feels like we are beating a dead horse. It means a lot and I am very grateful.

Also, I spoke to Lesley @ BGD. She rocks! She said my dilemma was quite common and they would work with me to use a base 4-prong or 6-prong solitaire and then credit me back when/if I decided to buy a different setting from them. Very cool.

So, my 2-cents. Completely, totally, ignore the wedding band. Very few people choose the "matching" wedding band anyway. Any ring, regardless of its design, can have a custom wedding band made to look more integral and fitted or any other design detail. It can be more or less difficult based on the Ering design, but I think the "whole look" search is making this impossible.

Unless you are eloping shortly after marriage...stop thinking about the "whole" final look.

The Gabriel NY option above is fine and might suit. But, I would personally go with a single shank setting as adding shanks (via a wedding band). to make that look cohesive would be easier. Something like this with or without pave. Without the bezel seems to be her preference, so this is just for the idea of a single shank.

The issue I have with dropping the wedding band look is because of a conversation I had w/ my girl. In her viewpoint, she thinks the wedding ring should bring the wow and really complete the entire deal as once you take your vows that is the important part. I'm not sure I ever thought of it in this way, but I can see her point. For this reason she is very much expecting a wedding band. Would she be cool and let us design or pick something later? Probably so but I think she'd be concerned and worried until it happened.

I showed the Simon G to her, and it's a no-go. Very clear she didn't like that one. Sorry.

@sledge did you see this setting from SimonG? This would be a really nice base for a custom wedding band. Price is great.

https://www.whiteflash.com/engageme...n-g-mr2956-solitaire-engagement-ring-5086.htm

This is lovely.
http://www.since1910.com/art-carved-ac-31v303-whitney-diamond-engagement-ring {posting in RG to show the pretty details}



Another form of a twist. Technically a split shank, but the way it wraps has that asymmetrical look she likes.
https://www.krikawa.com/rings/simple-six-prong-solitaire-engagement-ring

She didn't care for this Simon G either. The Whitney we both liked, but she mentioned as great as it was as-is she thought it needed some side stones. In her world, that means "maybe". The last one she really liked for its simplicity but also disliked because it's similar to what everyone else has (tonight she divulged this is why she doesn't like stuff like a basic Tiffany solitaire -- it's over done).

 

[sledge]

I also showed her a slew of stuff from Gabriel's. She liked the one @farrahlyn and I were discussing earlier called the Aleesa.

https://www.gabrielny.com/engagement-ring/ER6360W44JJ

However these two were her favorites:
Leigh - https://www.gabrielny.com/engagement-ring/ER11794R3PT4JJ
Hayley - https://www.gabrielny.com/engagement-ring/ER4309W44JJ

I have to confess, I was a little surprised the Leigh made the cut. It is very similar to that same JA setting where all this started.

Of course that said, she said she prefers the Hayley over the Leigh. It's unique, curvy, but not too flashy. Not sure I agree. I prefer the Leigh myself.

Oh yeah, and icing on the cake -- she tells me "I'm making this too big of a deal". I don't smoke but nearly needed a cigarette, lol.

 

[rockysalamander]

Well between my connection and some other errands I had to run, I didn't get back to comment here as quickly as I had hoped. Good news is we were able to sit down and I was able to show her a bunch of stuff and get some feedback.

Before we get too far into this, thank you! All you have been wonderful to me, and I really appreciate you holding my hand and encouraging me through this process, even though I know it kind of feels like we are beating a dead horse. It means a lot and I am very grateful.

Also, I spoke to Lesley @ BGD. She rocks! She said my dilemma was quite common and they would work with me to use a base 4-prong or 6-prong solitaire and then credit me back when/if I decided to buy a different setting from them. Very cool.



The issue I have with dropping the wedding band look is because of a conversation I had w/ my girl. In her viewpoint, she thinks the wedding ring should bring the wow and really complete the entire deal as once you take your vows that is the important part. I'm not sure I ever thought of it in this way, but I can see her point. For this reason she is very much expecting a wedding band. Would she be cool and let us design or pick something later? Probably so but I think she'd be concerned and worried until it happened.

I showed the Simon G to her, and it's a no-go. Very clear she didn't like that one. Sorry.



She didn't care for this Simon G either. The Whitney we both liked, but she mentioned as great as it was as-is she thought it needed some side stones. In her world, that means "maybe". The last one she really liked for its simplicity but also disliked because it's similar to what everyone else has (tonight she divulged this is why she doesn't like stuff like a basic Tiffany solitaire -- it's over done).

Feedback is good. So...did you settle on a setting?

 

[TweetyBird23]

She might have fun choosing/designing an intricate setting after the proposal AND she gets the experience of having an elegant solitaire! Not every woman gets to enjoy both.

 

[rockysalamander]

Here's the matching band for the Heyley.
'

Aleesa


I can't find the First one as a matched set. From a wearabilty perspective, I like the one @farrahlyn selected and the Aleesa. But, its not my hand!

 

[sledge]

Hey @rockysalamander, you have to go to the 360* view as they don't have a normal photo together.

Leigh

 

[sledge]

So her ranking was:
1. Hayley
2. Leigh
3. Aleesa

My ranking was:
1. Aleesa
2. Leigh
3. Hayley (only because we have 3 choices -- not a big fan of this ring style)

 

[sledge]

I'm leaning towards the Leigh, but also saw this other one that caught my eye (no feedback from her, yet).

No 360* view, nor a photo with the wedding band -- but there is a matching band that appears to snug up similar to how the Leigh wedding band does.

E-ring: https://www.gabrielny.com/engagement-ring/ER14709R3W44JJ
Wedding: https://www.gabrielny.com/engagement-ring/WB14709R3W44JJ

 

[sledge]

Whatever I decide, any thoughts on just letting BGD custom make the piece instead of buying from Gabriel or similar? They quoted me the original Schneider design and it was cheaper than the original designer by a decent chunk.

I'd like to go platinum with this, rather than WG and the price hike for Gabriel is substantial to jump material types.

 

[rockysalamander]

I actually surprised she liked the wedding band on the Leigh. It really is not integral in the way that the others she liked were. Its really just a slightly shaped pave band. But, if it suits her aesthetic, my confusion doesn't matter.

I don't have any experience with BGD's custom bench. Hopefully someone else will chime in.

I think many of us (myself included) work with David Klass out of LA. We worked out a design based on some inspiration photos and sketches. I mailed him my stones. His work is excellent (and I used to work in my grandmother's bespoke shop...I'm pretty picky) and his prices are quite affordable. I would be 100% comfortable with him re-creating any of these settings. If nothing else, you lose nothing by requesting a quote to compare to BGD.

None of these are a match to what you want, but you can see he can execute swirly-twirly designs.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BYlNNcklode/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**
https://www.instagram.com/p/BTKfdZkgAPC/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMcpx9TArK-/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**
https://www.instagram.com/p/BhPB0GqlC3O/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**

 

[16ocean]

@sledge

And just FYI, buying the simple soli now isn’t necessarily a waste. She could always have a simulant set in the soli for travel (if she doesn’t feel comfortable wearing her diamond), she could set a colored stone in it for variety/options, or it can be sold once the new setting is made. Lots of folks shop for pre-loved simple settings on Loupe Troop, so you could recoup some of your money for it if you wanted. Personally - and fully understanding that you want to get it right the first time - I still think the soli route is the best option to go, which let’s her choose exactly what she wants once she can articulate and formulate what is important to her. And that may only come after she has ‘lived with’ her diamond for awhile.

ditto! !!!

 

[LLJsmom]

Let me just say (and I don’t usually say this about the guy) but you are being very patient with her. Can you just let her choose THE WHOLE THING? E-ring, wedding band all of it. I would have given up a long time ago. And props to @rockysalamander for her endless suggestions. Best of luck to you. I’ll keep following because I am impressed by your determination to find the perfect set for her. I hope she appreciates it and you.

 

[sledge]

I actually surprised she liked the wedding band on the Leigh. It really is not integral in the way that the others she liked were. Its really just a slightly shaped pave band. But, if it suits her aesthetic, my confusion doesn't matter.

I don't have any experience with BGD's custom bench. Hopefully someone else will chime in.

I think many of us (myself included) work with David Klass out of LA. We worked out a design based on some inspiration photos and sketches. I mailed him my stones. His work is excellent (and I used to work in my grandmother's bespoke shop...I'm pretty picky) and his prices are quite affordable. I would be 100% comfortable with him re-creating any of these settings. If nothing else, you lose nothing by requesting a quote to compare to BGD.

None of these are a match to what you want, but you can see he can execute swirly-twirly designs.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BYlNNcklode/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**
https://www.instagram.com/p/BTKfdZkgAPC/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMcpx9TArK-/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**
https://www.instagram.com/p/BhPB0GqlC3O/?hl=en&taken-by=davidklassjewelry**

Edited to add: LOL, yeah I don't understand the Leigh setting either FWIW. She said integral this, flowy that, curve this, blah, blah, blah. Don't take me wrong I really like that ring, but it isn't what she told me. Then she acts like I'm the crazy one for calling her on it.

Wow, the more I see of DK's work the more I am impressed. Someone pointed me to him a few days ago to inquire about the Schneider design. I reached out via email but he has not responded. Maybe I should pick up the phone. It certainly appears he has the craftsmanship to get the job done. Some of those videos and photographs you shared were amazing. The last one was gorgeous and I don't even like that cut of stone, lol. Also, I thought the YG solitaire was phenomenal.

The fact he can transform pieces into beauty that I normally wouldn't appreciate says a lot about his work. Also I was impressed with the flow and smaller/finer lines of the twists. They didn't seem as bulky and heavy as others.

I think I owe it to myself to get make contact and get some pricing. I'd love to save a few dollars if possible.

Let me just say (and I don’t usually say this about the guy) but you are being very patient with her. Can you just let her choose THE WHOLE THING? E-ring, wedding band all of it. I would have given up a long time ago. And props to @rockysalamander for her endless suggestions. Best of luck to you. I’ll keep following because I am impressed by your determination to find the perfect set for her.

Thank you! I have been trying to get this right, but I would be lying if I said my patience has not been tested during this journey. I've just managed to hold it together for the most part, lol. I think at this point she is tired of talking about the rings, and I just need to man up and make a decision and live with the consequences. I will do my best and if she doesn't love it then in 5-10 years down the road we can upgrade and she can design whatever she wants.

 

[rockysalamander]

Wow, the more I see of DK's work the more I am impressed. Someone pointed me to him a few days ago to inquire about the Schneider design. I reached out via email but he has not responded. Maybe I should pick up the phone. It certainly appears he has the craftsmanship to get the job done. Some of those videos and photographs you shared were amazing. The last one was gorgeous and I don't even like that cut of stone, lol. Also, I thought the YG solitaire was phenomenal.
.

Yes. Call David Klass on the phone. He is not always great with first contact via email.

I think you have all the elements now to distill. Her top choice was the Hayley and you both like the Whitney. These are actually quite related from a design perspective. I greatly prefer the the integrated head with wrapping elements on the Whitney. So, what if you took the twist of solid and pave from the Schneider but had it wrap up and around the head like the Whitney. That gets you a design that basically straight (i.e., you have design that is along the same line as the shank). But, she wants that Hayley twist. So, he just has to twist that head a bit.

I found a ring that looks like that Whitney ring with some pave and is very pretty. What I love is that the side view is a pretty as the top view with the pave stones following that twisted shank. It has a tiny stone, but I think it is lovely and a unique take. I can see a really nice fitted bank made to work with this.



http://www.k-uno.co.jp/bridal/product/engagement/spira/

To have bit more of that twist from the top like the her favorite, imagine you had the diamond and prongs in your hand, looking down from the top, you twist that so the north prong become the NE prong.

 

[rockysalamander]

The reason I said not to worrk about the wedding band, yet, is that she should wear the ering for a while and figure out what she actually likes. If the ering feels wide, she may like something thin. When I said anything can be customized, this ring is a good example. I highlighted the weddingband as it is hard to see.


Couple more I found in my Pinterest that offter some inspiration

GreenLake Jewelry Works

Love this braided shank

Totally different look, but she liked unique. Without the extra metal swirls on the lower end of the shank.


Ok. Turtles may not be her thing, but imagine the pave here (white diamonds if you prefer), but with the semi-bezel of the below ring.

https://www.greenlakejewelry.com/gallery/cust_gallery.aspx?ImageID=103754

Tell me if you want me to stop

 

[TweetyBird23]

The reason I said not to worrk about the wedding band, yet, is that she should wear the ering for a while and figure out what she actually likes. If the ering feels wide, she may like something thin. When I said anything can be customized, this ring is a good example. I highlighted the weddingband as it is hard to see.


Couple more I found in my Pinterest that offter some inspiration

GreenLake Jewelry Works

Love this braided shank

Totally different look, but she liked unique. Without the extra metal swirls on the lower end of the shank.


Ok. Turtles may not be her thing, but imagine the pave here (white diamonds if you prefer), but with the semi-bezel of the below ring.

https://www.greenlakejewelry.com/gallery/cust_gallery.aspx?ImageID=103754

Tell me if you want me to stop

Lol turtles. I’d like to see her face if after all the deliberation, OP proposes with that.

 

[Tophat1]

What about Diana Vincent settings? They are amazingly well made and the Countour has won design awards. The Aura could be nice too

https://www.dianavincent.com/collec...t-contour-engagement-ring?variant=17258584705

 

[GearGirly]

I really, really think she needs to spend a few hours searching (at least go through every setting Brian Gavin has, and she needs to send you links!!!

 

[SimoneDi]

I really, really think she needs to spend a few hours searching (at least go through every setting Brian Gavin has, and she needs to send you links!!!

In addition, I also think that she needs to spend some time visiting local stores to try on some settings. Some designs may look great online but may be totally unflattering or uncomfortable in person. She needs to see for herself.

 

[rockysalamander]

I wonder if your girl would like something like this with the underpave-band. It has the twist in the head and both pave and solid.
https://www.brilliance.com/engagement-rings/bezel-diamond-bridge-ring-rose-gold

 

[the_mother_thing]

In addition, I also think that she needs to spend some time visiting local stores to try on some settings. Some designs may look great online but may be totally unflattering or uncomfortable in person. She needs to see for herself.

Ditto!

If I had a nickel for every ring setting I loved in pics/online but did not love once I had it/tried it on, I could probably reset all my loose stones ... in platinum.

 

[sledge]

Yes. Call David Klass on the phone. He is not always great with first contact via email.

I will call DK on Monday. Without totally killing ANY surprise element, hard to do much on the weekends as we live together.

The reason I said not to worrk about the wedding band, yet, is that she should wear the ering for a while and figure out what she actually likes. If the ering feels wide, she may like something thin. When I said anything can be customized, this ring is a good example. I highlighted the weddingband as it is hard to see.


Couple more I found in my Pinterest that offter some inspiration

GreenLake Jewelry Works

Love this braided shank

Totally different look, but she liked unique. Without the extra metal swirls on the lower end of the shank.


Ok. Turtles may not be her thing, but imagine the pave here (white diamonds if you prefer), but with the semi-bezel of the below ring.

https://www.greenlakejewelry.com/gallery/cust_gallery.aspx?ImageID=103754

Tell me if you want me to stop

You know I always enjoy seeing your bling and ideas! You seem to have an endless collection and spot in most the time. The designs are amazing examples and I appreciate you sharing!

I really, really liked that braided shank. Think it looks great with the princess cut. Of course I am partial to PC’s myself. Wish my girl liked those or cushions but she rarely sees anything in those cuts she likes. Such a shame.

Lol turtles. I’d like to see her face if after all the deliberation, OP proposes with that.

Haha don’t give me ideas. I have a pretty huge personality in real life and would totally propose with a ring she considers crazy just to test her theory of “I will love anything you get” and to give us a memorable story later on. Thankfully she has a great sense of humor or she couldn’t deal with me. I do lots of silly and funny things and thankfully we both tend to laugh a lot.

What about Diana Vincent settings? They are amazingly well made and the Countour has won design awards. The Aura could be nice too

https://www.dianavincent.com/collec...t-contour-engagement-ring?variant=17258584705

Very nice!

I really, really think she needs to spend a few hours searching (at least go through every setting Brian Gavin has, and she needs to send you links!!!

Not sure how much time she spent but this was one of my first thoughts. She said nothing there inspired her. The more I’ve learned is she doesn’t like care for the classic solitaire, halo or pretty much any style that she considers “mainstream”. Also most tend to have twists or curves to them in some manner.

Having looked through quite a few settings at BGD myself I think most of what they have on their site doesn’t match what she said at all.

Wish they did as it would make my life much, much easier.

In addition, I also think that she needs to spend some time visiting local stores to try on some settings. Some designs may look great online but may be totally unflattering or uncomfortable in person. She needs to see for herself.

We were actually back in our hometown yesterday and was on the way to dinner. She asked if we could stop by Jared’s on the way, if we had time and I didn’t mind. Of course I agreed.

FYI, Jared’s is owned by Signet who also owns James Allen.

http://www.signetjewelers.com/company/default.aspx

Anyhow while there we found a setting she really, really loved. Actually we both did. More on that soon. But the short version is yes, many of the settings we saw online were very different in person and on her finger — and many neither of us liked.

I wonder if your girl would like something like this with the underpave-band. It has the twist in the head and both pave and solid.
https://www.brilliance.com/engagement-rings/bezel-diamond-bridge-ring-rose-gold

You are good @rockysalamander! The one she picked in the store is very similar to this, but wait for it — with more bling, lol.

And I love this one personally. Great design and balance of diamonds and metal IMO.

Ditto!

If I had a nickel for every ring setting I loved in pics/online but did not love once I had it/tried it on, I could probably reset all my loose stones ... in platinum.

Very much our experience the other day in the store. They had several settings that were similar to stuff we saw online we liked and it just didn’t work in person.

 

[sledge]

Okay as I said, we stopped by a local jeweler the other day. The GM was assisting us and I learned they are owned by the same company that owns JA. The setting we found is a custom made setting for the local store but I suspect it can be found in JA with some research, or reproduced.

It’s similar but different than some of the stuff we discussed before. Most importantly she got really excited about it and mentioned it frequently after we left.

Excuse my big paws in the pics. I tried to snap a few photos as I wanted to remember and knew you all would want to see.

FYI I’m not convinced I will buy from here. Still thinking might have BGD or DK make one instead. Also the wedding band isn’t an exact match but was close and would be custom done (if buying from Jared’s) so it matches perfectly.

 

[dtnyc]

Okay as I said, we stopped by a local jeweler the other day. The GM was assisting us and I learned they are owned by the same company that owns JA.
*******
FYI I’m not convinced I will buy from here. Still thinking might have BGD or DK make one instead. Also the wedding band isn’t an exact match but was close and would be custom done (if buying from Jared’s) so it matches perfectly.

Coming out of lurkerdom (I love to follow a good setting journey) James Allen doesn't operate any retail outlets.

Also please tell me you aren't considering buying from Jared's?

I am not loving the channel setting on that ring above. Personally I think channel settings are slightly dated looking- and that channel setting in particular doesn't look well done (the gaps between the stones.) Did she like that element of the setting?

Can I ask how many times you have gone and seriously looked at rings together? Do you think her excitement is over that particular setting - or - she is just excited to know that this is really happening and she is going to be getting engaged/she knows the ball is really rolling in terms of engagement ring procurement? Or do you think she may be suffering from ring shopping/browsing fatigue and she might just want to get something on her finger sooner rather than later?

 

[sledge]

Coming out of lurkerdom (I love to follow a good setting journey) James Allen doesn't operate any retail outlets.

I wasn't saying JA operated the retail outlet. The parent/holdings company that owns both JA and Jareds is Signet Jewelers. So wherever you spend your money, it funnels back to the same big pocket at the end of the day -- apparently about $6.3 billion of big pocket per year.

http://www.signetjewelers.com/company/default.aspx

Signet Jewelers Limited is the world's largest retailer of diamond jewelry and the largest specialty jewelry retailer in the US, UK and Canada. Signet operates over 3,500 stores primarily under the name brands of Kay Jewelers, Zales, Jared The Galleria Of Jewelry, H.Samuel, Ernest Jones, Peoples and Piercing Pagoda. Signet also operates JamesAllen.com. The company’s annual sales of approximately $6.3 billion derive from the retailing of jewelry, watches and associated services.

Also please tell me you aren't considering buying from Jared's?

Not really. We just don't have many high end jewelers in our hometown and this one of the nicer spots that has a fairly large selection. Luckily we got the GM who was actually knowledgeable and very helpful overall.

I am not loving the channel setting on that ring above. Personally I think channel settings are slightly dated looking- and that channel setting in particular doesn't look well done (the gaps between the stones.) Did she like that element of the setting?

I see what you mean in these pics, which are magnified. In reality, looking at the ring as a whole has a slightly different appearance. I know it doesn't mean it doesn't still exist. Just saying a zoomed out real life view yields a slightly different view.

But we did not specifically talk about the channel set diamonds. I did notice that when we were looking, but honestly she liked the ring so much I really didn't want to nit pick it at the moment.

My moment of concern was when the GM sat a stone in the middle. To me, it gives a halo appearance which she has been against. But when I brought that up, she said it was different because of the elevations/heights of where the actual stone set compared to the swoops creating the halo effect.

Can I ask how many times you have gone and seriously looked at rings together? Do you think her excitement is over that particular setting - or - she is just excited to know that this is really happening and she is going to be getting engaged/she knows the ball is really rolling in terms of engagement ring procurement? Or do you think she may be suffering from ring shopping/browsing fatigue and she might just want to get something on her finger sooner rather than later?

Sure, you can ask anything. I'm pretty open. This is the second time in a retail store. The problem I've seen is some of the higher end stores have less in-stock items and crazy prices on the stuff they do have available.

As far as "why" she choose this setting, I am not sure. She was just drawn to it. She tried several settings before hand she thought she would like better and this one she really liked. Anything after that she compared against this one. Since it was HER idea to visit the store, I'm inclined to think she wasn't speaking from clouded judgment but maybe I'm wrong.

 

[LLJsmom]

Dear PSers, and OP, I think we should let this lovely couple just go or on their own and figure it out. Dear @sledge I think you are a darling for trying everything and the kitchen sink and all the sweet and patient PSers who have suggested setting after setting with customization after customization. But honestly who would have thought she would like a swirly halo with the diamond set way high above the halo, when she had never wanted a halo at all. I would say to @sledge keep taking her to see settings IRL and if she sees one she likes, GET IT!!!! Unless very brave, I would not even suggest having any vendor make it because don’t you want to be DONE? Well, whichever way I wish you the very best. You’re a catch. I hope for your sake in future joint decision making, you just present her with a limited number of options unless she is willing to put in the leg work and do the research herself.

 

[luv2sparkle]

I agree with much of what LLjsmom said. After reading this thread, it sounds like there is a lot of ring shopping/thinking about fatigue. If you can take her to a couple more stores and she definitely has a preference, I would go with what she picks. It could be a fun road trip to go to a larger city to look at a couple jewelers. As you have found, seeing a ring on your finger is different than looking at a photo. Someone mentioned that they didn't like the channel setting, and while not everyone likes it, it does have some pluses. It is great for everyday wear. It holds up well and you will not have to worry about losing a stone. It is also a very classic style. These things go in and out of vogue but channel setting will always be around. If she loves it go with it. It doesn't sound like at this point she would be too concerned about prong size or any of the other crazy things we all obsess about here. She will love it because it came from you, and you bought a great stone so that is pretty much going to be the star anyway.

 

[JDDN]

1. She is trying to guide me with details without saying "I want this one". She says whatever I pick she will love and the thought is what matters to her. For this reason, I don't ever get THAT reaction when the girl finds THEIR ring.
2. She believes society is backwards. Too much focus on the e-ring and not enough on the wedding band. In her opinion the e-ring should be plain & then come to life with the wedding band added.
3. She tends to like twisted/curved rings the best and usually rounds but has seen a few with princess & marquis cuts she likes.
4. She doesn't like many of the modern rings where the wedding band looks like an "after thought".
5. She likes e-rings & wedding bands that are designed to be integral with one another.
6. Because of 7 & 8, I don't see her ever wearing the wedding band solo.
7. No halos -- she doesn't like them.
8. The other night, she spouted off just get plain matching wedding bands.

I copied and pasted a blip from one of your previous posts on the other setting thread here. When I read #1 and #2, it sounds like she has an idea in her mind of what she thinks she likes but actually......doesn't completely know what she likes (which is totally understandable). I mean she said the e-ring should be plain and then come to life with the wedding band, but the setting she really likes is anything but plain . To me main problem is that she is wanting you to pick something out for her and is telling you she'll love whatever you pick but she's being super picky and actually rejecting settings you would pick for her, LOL!!! Let me tell you....it's totally fine to be picky. In fact PS is a bunch of picky a$$ people. But you can't have it both ways, it is just setting you up for failure and disappointment for her. Would it be at all reasonable to have a convo with her and let her know you are a bit worried that even though she is saying she'll love whatever you pick for her, you have serious concerns over that notion? What about having her choose three settings (with the accompanying band because that sounds very important to her) and then you will surprise her and propose to her with your choice of one of the three options. That way she has approved of the ring and band and she still gets the romantic and sweet "I picked this one specifically with you in my heart" feeling that I think she is desiring and it will still be a surprise. When I read she said you're "making this too big of a deal" that kinda feels like she doesn't get how hard this is and I worry for you, lol.

 

[TweetyBird23]

There is always this.

https://awesomejelly.com/13-of-the-coolest-engagement-ring-tattoos/