"Just Barely" Pregnant PS''ers

[HOUMedGal]

Noel, congratulations!

Well, as it turns out, Bliss and I may have more in common than just the fact we got our BFP''s on Halloween. Went for my 1st prenatal visit today, and the baby is measuring 1 week behind dates (6 weeks 2 days when my dates are 7 weeks 2 days) and the heart rate wasn''t as fast as my doc would have liked (she said "low 100''s" when she would like to see 120''s to 160''s. I know for a fact that my dates aren''t wrong...doc said it is possible to have a "late bloomer" so to speak, but she is concerned, and of course I''m uber concerned. She drew blood for HCG and progesterone and sent them STAT, but they didn''t come back before the office closed today so I''ll find out tomorrow, I guess. I''ll be going back for another ultrasound in 1 week (next Tuesday), and I guess until then, all there is to do is wait.

The waiting sucks. I just wish we knew so that I could either be sad, mourn our loss, and move on, OR actually get excited about this pregnancy. From the very beginning, I was hesitant to get excited, and now....I''m just a mess. I do believe that what''s meant to be will be, and I can accept that. Perhaps this isn''t the right body for this little soul to inhabit. I haven''t given up all hope, but I just don''t know how much hope to maintain. DH is being awesome...he''s out right now picking up some of my fave comfort food takeout for dinner.

I haven''t had any spotting or cramping whatsoever during the whole pregnancy so far, but I''m wondering if it''s a bad sign that I''ve felt a tad bit less nauesous this week? I mean, I wasn''t that nauseous to begin with anyway, and never puked so far....I dunno. I just don''t know what to think.

 

[lili]

HOUMedGal--
Oh no...I''m keeping all my fingers crossed for your little one.
Hope you get good news tomorrow.

 

[qtiekiki]

HOUMedGal
Thinking of you. Fingers crossed for good numbers tomorrow.

 

[HOUMedGal]

My doctor just called me from home to give me my results...I knew I liked her for some reason!

HCG is 45,000 and progesterone 11.2. HCG is appropriate for where I should be by dates, but that''s not necessarily good news, because she says she really would have expected a more robust heart with that kind of HCG. Progesterone is on the low side, so she said if I wanted we could start progesterone supplements. I figure it won''t hurt anything, and if there''s a chance it will help, I''ll take it. She also asked me if I''d like to come in sooner than next Tuesday (YES) and will see me for a repeat US on Friday (when I will be right at 8wks by dates). So we''ll see.

 

[icekid]

HMG- Huge hugs girlie... sending you and your little bean my thoughts and prayers. So glad your hubby is taking good care of you during this time!

 

[Mara]

HMG...i have my fingers crossed for you and the nugget. i didn''t get nausea til around 6.5 weeks and even then it wasn''t ''bad'' until 8-9 weeks...so you never know... it kind of came and went at first. i hope next US goes great and nugget has a strong beat!

bliss...i forgot who else said this but wanted to agree, my friend''s doctor said the same thing...once your body knows what to do it usually doesn''t have much trouble doing it again. my friend had a conception and it was lost very early aka 5 weeks but hopefully she will have a much more sticky bean very soon.

 

[Dreamer_D]

HMG I will be thinking of you and your bean this week.

 

[noelwr]

oh no! that totally sucks, HMG. I will also keep my fingers crossed for you.

now I''m worried about my first US not being until the 10th week of pregnancy, and they wouldn''t see me earlier. "If you do it too early, you won''t be able to see anything." I thought you were able see stuff as of 5 weeks. Holland is such a stupid place to live when it comes to medical issues. fine, we have great health insurance, but unless you''re dying no one does anything for you here.

well, ok, I already know DH would tell me to suck it up and most pregnancies go well, so I''ll just hang in there.

to change of topic, how is everyone sleeping? it''s probably too early to make a difference, but I''m trying to learn to sleep on my side and it is horribly uncomfortable. the aching in my underbelly is worse on my side, so I end up lying on my back and all the aches go away (plus it''s more comfy for my back).

 

[Puppmom]

Hou - I''m hoping your little bean is just giving you a scare and you find out all is well. You''ll be in my thoughts!

 

[swimmer]

Pulling for you and the bean Hou!

 

[ljmorgan]

HOU I am sending good wishes your way -- I sincerely have hope for you. My daughter measured exactly a week behind when I was 7w5d -- she measured 6w5d. If you DO have a late bloomer, I feel that the heart rate is right where it should be for not even 7 weeks. Also, some women have higher levels of HCG earlier -- development corresponding to HCG is only an estimate. For instance, studies from the NIH said with HCG levels of 10,800 you should have a visible embryo with a heartbeat. When my HCG was around 10,000 I was only 21 dpo -- no heartbeat at all to see there! I''m holding out hope for you!

 

[Bliss]

Wow, so much has happened! New mommies in here!

Oh, ladies... thank you so much for sharing your experiences and opening your hearts. My mom is flying in today to stay with me for a week while I go through this. I love DH, but there is nothing like Mom when you're in need of serious comfort! You have been amazing and when I can't sleep at night, sometimes I read over and over again your messages of hope and love to a sister in need. I'm feeling much better now, though sometimes it's still so hard. I am in awe of your kindness. Thank you.

One of our doormen is a week away from having a baby boy! We sent him the cutest outfit from the registry and he is so excited, as are we for him. He's such a thoughtful and perceptive soul that today he asked what was up with us lately. We're always laughing and joking - I love to play pranks on my favorite doormen sometimes

but lately I've just been coming and going with sad smiles, huddled up next to DH like a lost soul. He just knew. So today I told him I had a miscarriage and just teared up when I realized it's going to be a long road to getting over the grief.

The hardest part is FEELING pregnant. I tried to miscarry naturally but it didn't work. The misoprostol didn't work either. Mental agony! I guess I was in the rare single digit percentage point population of women it doesn't work for. My OB is recommending a D&C and I am so grateful to have found an alternate solution. I don't have a good feeling about this D&C. There seems to be a greater risk of scarring in the uterus and infertility issues with an invasive procedure such as a D&C. It is also, I found, not necessary for a ending a miscarriage that is so early. I found, thank you Lord, a doctor who is at the forefront of manual vacuum aspiration, which is manual suction instead of a sharp curettage, which is the metal scraping of the uterus that would take place in a D&C. People fly in from all over to see her, apparently. They are pioneers in manual vacuum aspiration.

This is all very painful to share, but I am hoping it helps someone here one day if confronted with these decisions. It is amazing to me that so few women know of this, myself included, and it has a much lower complication rate... it is less invasive, takes 5-10 minutes and there is a shorter recovery time. No going under like in a D&C. It is more natural and is better for future fertility, I believe. In the past, it was used as a therapeutic means to end heavy periods and is safe. So I'm getting that procedure done tomorrow. DH and my mom are coming with me so I will have their support... still, I'm scared.

I am such a baby, myself!

Anyway... I hope my experience helps my fellow sisters in the future. I am learning so much and am so humbled. DH and I have grown even closer. Wow, this being a parent is the greatest thing in the world. I cannot imagine doing anything bigger or greater in my life as a human being. I salute all moms and dads from the bottom of my heart.

 

[Bliss]

HOUie, don't you ever say that! We're not going to have that in common - your baby is going to grow stronger each day and you will hear an amazing heartbeat at your next US. I am praying for you, sista!

Your peanut is going to be JUST FINE!

Think positive, girlfriend! You have to, for this little bean inside you!

I just have a feeling your bean is a late bloomer. Maybe the bean implanted a little later than we thought and that's why the heart rate is slow - it just started beating sooner than we imagined. And doctors MANY MANY times miscalculate how big a baby should be. It is more common than you think.

I am crossing my fingers and toes for you... I just know exactly how you feel right now. Scared as heck and full of fear for your precious baby. I *know* your bean is meant to be! Your baby is going to be fine!!!! Tell the bean to stop scaring mommy!

Sending major prayers your way!!!!!!!!!!

(((HUGS)))

 

[HOUMedGal]

Thanks so much for the good wishes and crossed fingers lili, qtiekiki, icekid, mara, dreamer, noel, puppmom, swimmer, and lindsey. It means a lot!

Lindsey, what you wrote does make me feel a bit better. Thank you! I spent all day yesterday after my appointment crying and mourning what hasn''t even happened yet, but I''ve decided today that I''ve got to be hopeful, because that''s all I can do right now! A good outcome is still possible, and I''m still pregnant today, no cramps or bleeding or anything. I woke up quite nauesous this morning, with bb''s that were more tender than they had been the past couple of days, which could be a good sign I guess, BUT I also started progesterone supplements last night (took my first one before bed) so that may have had something to do with the symptoms. Who knows.

Anyway, I''m going to try to remain as hopeful as possible, and keep focused on my work to get me through till my next US on Friday (it''ll be at 10am). I''m in the NICU right now, today''s my second day. It''s interesting and enlightening working here right now...just gives a whole new perspective on this whole babymaking/prenatal/early postnatal time. There''s just so much to be grateful for when you end up with a good pregnancy and a perfect, healthy little baby. I''ve got some sick babies to take care of, so getting focused on my work right now isn''t hard at all!

 

[Bliss]

HOUie, there is so much more hope for your little bean!

When my peanut didn''t have a strong heartbeat, it was lower than 100. It was in the 90s and my doctor told me that there was no hope, really. It was measuring way smaller and she told me to prepare for a miscarriage. She said aside from a medical miracle, there was no hope.

Your situation is SO different!!!!!!!!

You have tons of hope!

I really believe your bean is just a late bloomer and you will hear a THUNDEROUS heartbeat at your next US!

Boom boom boom! Like that.

I know people tell you not to worry... you can''t help it. It''s really hard. I remember it consumed all of my thoughts to the point I had no energy left for anything else.

But remember, you are still pregnant! Your little bub needs you now more than ever!

You''re still pregnant! There is TONS of hope!

Whenever I started to cry or worry, I''d read inspirational books... I''d smile and wave at babies, hopeful for our future bean. Do some heart to hearts with your bean! Talk to your belly! I feel they can hear you! I know mine did.

Pulling for you so hard, sistergirl!

 

[HOUMedGal]

Date: 12/1/2009 3:32:16 PM
Author: Bliss
HOUie, don''t you ever say that! We''re not going to have that in common - your baby is going to grow stronger each day and you will hear an amazing heartbeat at your next US. I am praying for you, sista!

Your peanut is going to be JUST FINE!

Think positive, girlfriend! You have to, for this little bean inside you!

I just have a feeling your bean is a late bloomer. Maybe the bean implanted a little later than we thought and that''s why the heart rate is slow - it just started beating sooner than we imagined. And doctors MANY MANY times miscalculate how big a baby should be. It is more common than you think.

I am crossing my fingers and toes for you... I just know exactly how you feel right now. Scared as heck and full of fear for your precious baby. I *know* your bean is meant to be! Your baby is going to be fine!!!! Tell the bean to stop scaring mommy!

Sending major prayers your way!!!!!!!!!!

(((HUGS)))

Awww, Bliss, you totally just made me cry. Dang hormones, I''m such a leaky faucet right now!! LOL! Thank you so much for your kind words...you are an amazing lady to be able to say such nice supportive things to someone else when you are hurting so much yourself. I am glad you checked in...I''ve been thinking about you A LOT. I hope and pray for you that tomorrow''s procedure will give you the closure you need to grieve appropriately and then start the recovery process. I will definitely ask my doctor about the manual vaccuum aspiration if I have to go there. But, as you ordered, I am going to stay positive right now!! Yesterday I didn''t feel very positive at all, just worried sick. But today I choose to maintain hope! I won''t give up on this little peanut unless he/she shows me that it''s definitely time to let go.

And if I have to let go, I will comfort in the knowledge that whatever happens is God''s will, or "everything happens for a reason.". My dad said something really nice...something along the lines of "if this pregnancy isn''t meant to be, it just means that your baby''s little soul needs a better, healthier body to inhabit, and the soul will be back once that better body is ready!"

 

[Bliss]

HOUie, your baby is gonna be FINE!

I just know it! I wish my bean's heart rate had been in the 100s. That would have given me so much more hope. It really does sound like your puffin baby's heart just started beating a little later than the docs would have thought. I did a ton of research until my eyes fell out on low fetal heart rates when I was going through my ordeal, and yours sounds good. Sounds like a late bloomer. My case... so totally different from yours!

You'll see! You've got a fighter in there! The bub probably took his/her sweet time implanting and is now scaring mommy and daddy. I just know your bean will be perfectly healthy and surprise your OB on Friday!

I can't wait to see an awesomely relieved HOUie post on Friday that the heartbeat is strong and fast... and that your bub is doing super well.

(((HUGS)))

 

[Kaleigh]

HMG,
I am pulling for you and your bean, and sending tons of positive vibes your way.

 

[somethingshiny]

Big Congrats to Noelwr!!

Bliss, prayers for a speedy recovery following your procedure. And more for mental well-being!

HOU~ You and the baby are going to be FINE, perfect in fact!! Lots of prayers and dust outgoing for you both!

I had my US today and my official due date is 7/17 (so hang in there HOU, you and me are in this together!!)

My doc doesn''t want me to try a VBAC and wants to schedule a C around 7/7 - 7/9. I asked him for complete straightforwardness and he definitely gave it to me, but WOW. Some of what he brought up about me trying a VBAC didn''t even cross my mind! Everything is going well, I have to go in again next week to make sure everything is still fine, then I''ll go to normal monthly appts.

Morning sickness is kicking my butt but hopefully it''ll go away soon! I have to take a sick bag in the car with me.

Hope you''re all feeling well!

 

[Puppmom]

Hello! I would like to officially join the Barely Preggo thread. DH and I got our BFP last week. I''m super scared! I just know way too much about all the bad things that can happen. I''m trying not to worry too much but that really is a challenge for me.

I don''t really have any symptoms except sore boobs but that''s normal for me. My skin is REALLY itchy but I think that may just be the weather???

We''re not telling family and friends until the first trimester is over. We''ve just decided that we would not be comfortable sharing the news if this bean doesn''t stick so we''ll wait until our little bean has a better chance. This is going to be SUPER hard to keep secret.

Congrats to you all on your BFPs and here''s to some healthy babies in the summer of 2010!

Hou, I''m thinking about you. I really have a good feeling that everything is going to be okay. Can I ask why your doc thought it necessary to check the heart rate through U/S? I figured I wouldn''t get to hear that until it was audible on the doppler (10 weeks?).

 

[Puppmom]

Hello! I would like to officially join the Barely Preggo thread. DH and I got our BFP last week. I''m super scared! I just know way too much about all the bad things that can happen. I''m trying not to worry too much but that really is a challenge for me.

I don''t really have any symptoms except sore boobs but that''s normal for me. My skin is REALLY itchy but I think that may just be the weather???

We''re not telling family and friends until the first trimester is over. We''ve just decided that we would not be comfortable sharing the news if this bean doesn''t stick so we''ll wait until our little bean has a better chance. This is going to be SUPER hard to keep secret.

Congrats to you all on your BFPs and here''s to some healthy babies in the summer of 2010!

Hou, I''m thinking about you. I really have a good feeling that everything is going to be okay. Can I ask why your doc thought it necessary to check the heart rate through U/S? I figured I wouldn''t get to hear that until it was audible on the doppler (10 weeks?).

 

[HOUMedGal]

Bliss, you are a sweetheart. Thank you.

And thanks to Kaleigh, somethingshiny, and puppmom too! Somethingshiny, I do hope the peanut and I will be joining you on 7/17!!!

Puppmom, welcome to the thread!!

SO happy for you!! It will definitely be hard waiting to tell everyone your good news...we had a really hard time and ended up giving in. Our family and close friends know now, but we haven''t gone "public," per se. At my appointment, which was my first, my doc wheeled in the ultrasound as if it was routine. I think it''s fairly common practice these days for docs to do an early ultrasound for dating/viability purposes.

Although, I''m not sure I would have rather known what I know now, or just have been in the dark about the possibility of losing my baby....and I remember the debacle that Bliss went through after her 1st ultrasound when they thought she might have an ectopic....leaves me wondering if early ultrasounds are truly useful or just stirring up trouble, yanno?

 

[somethingshiny]

Congratultions, Puppmom!! It''s a hard secret to keep so I wish you lots of luck on that!!



As far as early US are concerned. My first early US indicated that I would miscarry, and I did. Having been through many, I will say, it was a *bit* easier knowing "ahead of time" rather than just miscarrying when you think everything is fine.

With my son, my early US and hearing/seeing the heart beat, it brought me great joy. Today, I had my first US with this baby (7w3d) and heard and saw a healthy 141 beat. Again, it brought me joy. I think this early, we grab at any glimmer of hope for a healthy pregnancy. Unfortunately, anything negative turns monumentally huge because of our fears.

I''ve always had early US, probably due to my risks, but I thought they were basically standard now. The same US was used to measure the crown to rump length to verify due date which can be determined more accurately early rather than later. For example, JT was right on track at my 6-7 week US, but by 20 weeks, he was measuring almost a month further!

 

[ChargerGrrl]

HOU- I'm rooting for you, girl! As Bliss said, there's TONS of hope. I'm glad to hear that you were able to get an earlier ultrasound and are taking supplements to boost your progesterone. I'll be thinking of you, DH and your precious bean on Friday!

Noelwr- Once bloodtests confirmed that I had a nice high Beta in relation to my DPO, my Doc had me come in for my 1st appointment at 6 weeks. She mentioned that she likes to err on the side of caution and get her patients in early "to make sure that everything is where it's supposed to be." She did warn us before the ultrasound that we may not be able to see/hear anything, but we lucked out and saw the twinkling line that represented a heartbeat. But from what I understand, coming in this early for a first visit isn't the norm.

somethingshiny- Glad to hear that everything is going well, and that your Doc is a straight-shooter. I'm sure you have lots to think about now!

puppmom- WELCOME! I'm right there with you on not telling folks until the 1st trimester is over, but it's been SO HARD! We did tell our immediate family during the TG Holiday, and my 2 best friends know but that's it. I only have about 2 weeks to go until my 2nd trimester, so i'm in the home stretch!

Bliss- You're such a strong, amazing woman! Good thoughts and vibes outgoing.

Nothing new to report here, but can I admit that it freaks me out a bit that my symptoms just aren't really there? I am tired a lot, have the awful belching/indigestion and heightened sense of smell, but that's really it. No sore boobs, morning-sickness, etc... I know I should be thankful that I lucked out on the symptoms, but sometimes I crave to FEEL pregnant. When is this finally going to feel real to me?

 

[KimberlyH]

HMG, sending lots of good and calming rhoughts your way.

Bliss so glad your mom is able to come spend some time with you.

 

[somethingshiny]

Date: 12/1/2009 7:47:26 PM
Author: ChargerGrrl
but sometimes I crave to FEEL pregnant. When is this finally going to feel real to me?

When you feel the flutters! I felt my first fluttering at 11 weeks with JT, obviously a bit early, but no mistaking that feeling! Also, you''ll feel pregnant as soon as EVERYONE knows, because they don''t let you forget it for a minute.

 

[Kaleigh]

Charger,
I didn''t have any symptoms with my second. No sore boobs, no MS, and carried small. I considered it lucky as I was the opposite when I was preggo with DD, who I had before my son. I gained 28 pounds with both kids, but showed a lot more with DD. I don''t have any clue as to why that is, but I was tiny with DS and huge with DD... I hope you don''t get MS, and you''ll pop soon. Are you small to begin with?? How far along are you??

I think it''s soooooo exciting we have so many Preggo PS''ers and PS Mommies!!!

 

[qtiekiki]

Bliss
Big *HUG* to you. You are an amazing woman. Glad you will have your mom for comfort and support for the next week.

HOU
Sending you lots of good vibes. The sore boobies and nauseousness are good signs. Stay positive.

Somethingshiny
I remember there was a lady in my childbirth class whose dr. insisted she has a scheduled c-section and not try VBAC. She was really upset with her dr. b/c she said there''s no reason she can''t try VBAC since her first two births were vaginal and only her third was c-section. It seems like her dr. wasn''t telling her the risks or something. So I am glad your dr. is straightforward with you.

Puppmom
Congrats again.

ChargerGrrl
Consider yourself lucky with the minimal symptoms. I never had morning sickness with both pregnancies; it was mostly fatigue for me. So it''s not a sign of anything. You''ll feel pregnant soon when you start getting a little bump.

 

[noelwr]

does anyone have nice U/S photos to share with the rest of us who have to wait forever and then we can kind of picture what''s going on inside?

otherwise not much update. I was feeling queezy before lunch yesterday, but that went away once I ate. also, I told DH I wasn''t making dinner because I felt way too exhausted and thinking I had to do that plus fold a mountain of laundry just made me depressed. not sure if it''s the pregnancy or me still trying to get over jet lag. otherwise, I''m still getting the occasional cramping which I think is related to digestion. I think I have to go buy one of those pregnancy pillows to learn how to sleep on my side.

 

[HOUMedGal]

Just checking in. Repeat ultrasound is tomorrow at 10am....I welcome all the good vibes you guys can send our way!! I''m soooo hoping and praying to see some good growth and a nice heartbeat. I will be OK if this pregnancy doesn''t work out, but I REALLY hope and pray that it does. I''ve continued to have sore boobs as well as nausea off and on these past few days...it''s strange, now I feel more like I did during week 5 and early in week 6 with the increased nausea. Hoping that''s a good sign, maybe Peanut''s growth is back on track! Also, have been super exhausted again these past few days, just like I was earlier on. I''m cautiously hopeful.