Is basic chivalry/courtesy dead?

[Lauren8211]

For the record, I do not equate "classy" with smiling when someones rude and pretending it doesnt bother you. I equate classy with treating people respectfully, and expecting said treatment.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:14:04 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 3/3/2010 2:01:20 PM

Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 1:53:06 PM

Author: LilyKat

I guess I was just raised differently. I would not be intentionally rude to anyone, regardless of how they behave. To me, pointing out someone else''s breach of etiquette (especially rudely) is far worse than any breach of etiquette they themselves may have made.


Like Haven and others, I think smiling and letting it drop is the classy thing to do.

Well excuse my crassness, I guess I just can''t be as classy as Haven and the others...


I actually don''t think it has anything to do with how anyone was raised. I was raised very well and I have manners, and I take offense at your suggestion that I was raised badly. Maybe it has more to do with where you live or the people around you. When people are constantly being rude around you, well you know what, there''s only so much smiling and letting it go you can do before you go stir crazy and have to say something for the sake of your own sanity.

Hey--Don''t drag me into this!

I can be as rude as they come, but I''ve found that the killing-people-with-kindness route is much more satisfying because it makes the rude people mad as hell.

I imagine my intentions for simply smiling are the rudest of all, actually. I just get off looking kind, but inside I''m twiddling my fingertips together and thinking ''MWUAHAHAHAHAHAA! I just made you even angrier!'' See? I''m rude.

I think knowing you''re secretly evil makes me respect you more Haven.

 

[Haven]

Oh good, HH. I knew I''d be in good company.

Now I''ve let you all in on my secret. DH laughs when I tell him that everyone on here thinks I''m so sweet and kind. He knows better.

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:15:23 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 3/3/2010 2:14:04 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 3/3/2010 2:01:20 PM

Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 1:53:06 PM

Author: LilyKat

I guess I was just raised differently. I would not be intentionally rude to anyone, regardless of how they behave. To me, pointing out someone else''s breach of etiquette (especially rudely) is far worse than any breach of etiquette they themselves may have made.


Like Haven and others, I think smiling and letting it drop is the classy thing to do.

Well excuse my crassness, I guess I just can''t be as classy as Haven and the others...


I actually don''t think it has anything to do with how anyone was raised. I was raised very well and I have manners, and I take offense at your suggestion that I was raised badly. Maybe it has more to do with where you live or the people around you. When people are constantly being rude around you, well you know what, there''s only so much smiling and letting it go you can do before you go stir crazy and have to say something for the sake of your own sanity.

Hey--Don''t drag me into this!

I can be as rude as they come, but I''ve found that the killing-people-with-kindness route is much more satisfying because it makes the rude people mad as hell.

I imagine my intentions for simply smiling are the rudest of all, actually. I just get off looking kind, but inside I''m twiddling my fingertips together and thinking ''MWUAHAHAHAHAHAA! I just made you even angrier!'' See? I''m rude.

I think knowing you''re secretly evil makes me respect you more Haven.

Same.

I can respect the passive aggressive smile. I can!

 

[sunnyd]

Let's face it folks, sometimes being rude and/or passive aggressive is fun.

ETA: I should say, in response to another's rudeness.

 

[elrohwen]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:18:46 PM
Author: sunnyd
Let's face it folks, sometimes being rude and/or passive aggressive is fun.

ETA: I should say, in response to another's rudeness.

And this is why chivalry is dead. It's so much more fun being a jerk

eta: j/k

 

[princesss]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:14:04 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 3/3/2010 2:01:20 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 1:53:06 PM
Author: LilyKat
I guess I was just raised differently. I would not be intentionally rude to anyone, regardless of how they behave. To me, pointing out someone else''s breach of etiquette (especially rudely) is far worse than any breach of etiquette they themselves may have made.

Like Haven and others, I think smiling and letting it drop is the classy thing to do.

Well excuse my crassness, I guess I just can''t be as classy as Haven and the others...

I actually don''t think it has anything to do with how anyone was raised. I was raised very well and I have manners, and I take offense at your suggestion that I was raised badly. Maybe it has more to do with where you live or the people around you. When people are constantly being rude around you, well you know what, there''s only so much smiling and letting it go you can do before you go stir crazy and have to say something for the sake of your own sanity.

Hey--Don''t drag me into this!

I can be as rude as they come, but I''ve found that the killing-people-with-kindness route is much more satisfying because it makes the rude people mad as hell.

I imagine my intentions for simply smiling are the rudest of all, actually. I just get off looking kind, but inside I''m twiddling my fingertips together and thinking ''MWUAHAHAHAHAHAA! I just made you even angrier!'' See? I''m rude.

LOL, Haven, I''m so glad you said that. I''ve been sitting here thinking, "But she IS being rude, just wonderfully creative about it!" I think you''re a classy lady, and I hope you know that, but I was kind of

at the suggestion that your reaction was any classier or better than anybody else''s. It''s the same as saying something - it''s meant to call attention to somebody''s rudeness and aggrivate them a little bit.

It is, by the way, AMAZINGLY effective! I''ve been putting it to use, and the results can be hilarious.

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:20:55 PM
Author: elrohwen

Date: 3/3/2010 2:18:46 PM
Author: sunnyd
Let''s face it folks, sometimes being rude and/or passive aggressive is fun.

ETA: I should say, in response to another''s rudeness.

And this is why chivalry is dead. It''s so much more fun being a jerk

eta: j/k

Hey I''m a woman, I don''t need to be chivalrous!

 

[princesss]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:22:32 PM
Author: sunnyd

Date: 3/3/2010 2:20:55 PM
Author: elrohwen

Date: 3/3/2010 2:18:46 PM
Author: sunnyd
Let''s face it folks, sometimes being rude and/or passive aggressive is fun.

ETA: I should say, in response to another''s rudeness.

And this is why chivalry is dead. It''s so much more fun being a jerk

eta: j/k

Hey I''m a woman, I don''t need to be chivalrous!

Yup! Now move your leg over, my imaginary bunny needs a seat!

 

[Haven]

Oh, I''m with you Princesss. My grandmother used to get mad*mad*mad when I did things like that. She was in the car with me once when I winked at a guy who had been tailgating me for a while, and then flew past me in the left lane. Oooh, did I get it.

 

[Laila619]

Re men not giving up their seats for a pregnant woman...I think this is simply because a lot of times it''s not always obvious that a woman is pregnant! The woman could just appear to be a bit on the hefty side. Or with a bulky winter coat, it might not be obvious at all. It''s not like a guy is going to be staring at every woman who gets on the bus or train. I honestly don''t think it''s because they aren''t chivalrous anymore.

 

[decodelighted]

Sometimes folks just don''t know better. I''ve been the "backpack violator" myself (shamefully). Was traveling the first time in Europe and just didn''t realize it was bad manners to wear the backpack on the crowded train. A VERY IRATE elderly Italian man set me straight and it didn''t take me learning Italian to know what he meant.

I also remember learning from others that you should stand to the right of an escalator so other people can pass you if you''re just going to ride.

Not everybody''s parents covered ALL the courtesy bases. Sometimes stuff doesn''t come UP during the time you have with your parents. If you see friends/siblings/nephews/nieces behaving in discourteous ways -- maybe THAT''s a good place to bring it up gently. Offering advice to strangers (nicely or rudely) is trickier territory.

I also think its unwise to feel ENTITLED to offered seats, opened doors, people lifting your bags in & out of the overhead compartment etc. And unwise to challenge the overtly rude. You really never know who is going to snap on you violently. Is smugness worth THAT possibility?

 

[princesss]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:24:33 PM
Author: Haven
Oh, I''m with you Princesss. My grandmother used to get mad*mad*mad when I did things like that. She was in the car with me once when I winked at a guy who had been tailgating me for a while, and then flew past me in the left lane. Oooh, did I get it.

LOL, I can totally imagine that.

Add me to the list that likes this secretly devious side of you.

 

[hisdiamondgirl]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:28:03 PM
Author: decodelighted
Sometimes folks just don''t know better. I''ve been the ''backpack violator'' myself (shamefully). Was traveling the first time in Europe and just didn''t realize it was bad manners to wear the backpack on the crowded train. A VERY IRATE elderly Italian man set me straight and it didn''t take me learning Italian to know what he meant.

I also remember learning from others that you should stand to the right of an escalator so other people can pass you if you''re just going to ride.

Not everybody''s parents covered ALL the courtesy bases. Sometimes stuff doesn''t come UP during the time you have with your parents. If you see friends/siblings/nephews/nieces behaving in discourteous ways -- maybe THAT''s a good place to bring it up gently. Offering advice to strangers (nicely or rudely) is trickier territory.

I also think its unwise to feel ENTITLED to offered seats, opened doors, people lifting your bags in & out of the overhead compartment etc. And unwise to challenge the overtly rude. You really never know who is going to snap on you violently. Is smugness worth THAT possibility?

True, but I doubt that the middle-aged woman with her nose upturned to the world who feels entitled to have the door held for her is going to snap on me violently...but then I guess you never know

 

[Haven]

I don''t know, HDG--crazy comes in all shapes and sizes these days.

 

[hisdiamondgirl]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:44:15 PM
Author: Haven
I don''t know, HDG--crazy comes in all shapes and sizes these days.

Ha! I think I could take her though

 

[Bia]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:28:03 PM
Author: decodelighted
Sometimes folks just don''t know better. I''ve been the ''backpack violator'' myself (shamefully). Was traveling the first time in Europe and just didn''t realize it was bad manners to wear the backpack on the crowded train. A VERY IRATE elderly Italian man set me straight and it didn''t take me learning Italian to know what he meant.

I also remember learning from others that you should stand to the right of an escalator so other people can pass you if you''re just going to ride.

Not everybody''s parents covered ALL the courtesy bases. Sometimes stuff doesn''t come UP during the time you have with your parents. If you see friends/siblings/nephews/nieces behaving in discourteous ways -- maybe THAT''s a good place to bring it up gently. Offering advice to strangers (nicely or rudely) is trickier territory.

I also think its unwise to feel ENTITLED to offered seats, opened doors, people lifting your bags in & out of the overhead compartment etc. And unwise to challenge the overtly rude. You really never know who is going to snap on you violently. Is smugness worth THAT possibility?

It''s not smugness, at least not from where I stand...it''s losing patience with people in general. The ''I''m not the doorman'' comment would come in handy for certain ''types.'' Types I DON''T see jumping me.

 

[hisdiamondgirl]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:48:38 PM
Author: Bia

Date: 3/3/2010 2:28:03 PM
Author: decodelighted
Sometimes folks just don''t know better. I''ve been the ''backpack violator'' myself (shamefully). Was traveling the first time in Europe and just didn''t realize it was bad manners to wear the backpack on the crowded train. A VERY IRATE elderly Italian man set me straight and it didn''t take me learning Italian to know what he meant.

I also remember learning from others that you should stand to the right of an escalator so other people can pass you if you''re just going to ride.

Not everybody''s parents covered ALL the courtesy bases. Sometimes stuff doesn''t come UP during the time you have with your parents. If you see friends/siblings/nephews/nieces behaving in discourteous ways -- maybe THAT''s a good place to bring it up gently. Offering advice to strangers (nicely or rudely) is trickier territory.

I also think its unwise to feel ENTITLED to offered seats, opened doors, people lifting your bags in & out of the overhead compartment etc. And unwise to challenge the overtly rude. You really never know who is going to snap on you violently. Is smugness worth THAT possibility?

It''s not smugness, at least not from where I stand...it''s losing patience with people in general. The ''I''m not the doorman'' comment would come in handy for certain ''types.'' Types I DON''T see jumping me.

Exactly...and you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

 

[Bia]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 2:48:38 PM
Author: Bia

Date: 3/3/2010 2:28:03 PM
Author: decodelighted
Sometimes folks just don''t know better. I''ve been the ''backpack violator'' myself (shamefully). Was traveling the first time in Europe and just didn''t realize it was bad manners to wear the backpack on the crowded train. A VERY IRATE elderly Italian man set me straight and it didn''t take me learning Italian to know what he meant.

I also remember learning from others that you should stand to the right of an escalator so other people can pass you if you''re just going to ride.

Not everybody''s parents covered ALL the courtesy bases. Sometimes stuff doesn''t come UP during the time you have with your parents. If you see friends/siblings/nephews/nieces behaving in discourteous ways -- maybe THAT''s a good place to bring it up gently. Offering advice to strangers (nicely or rudely) is trickier territory.

I also think its unwise to feel ENTITLED to offered seats, opened doors, people lifting your bags in & out of the overhead compartment etc. And unwise to challenge the overtly rude. You really never know who is going to snap on you violently. Is smugness worth THAT possibility?

It''s not smugness, at least not from where I stand...it''s losing patience with people in general. The ''I''m not the doorman'' comment would come in handy for certain ''types.'' Types I DON''T see jumping me.

Exactly...and you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

ill.

and yes.

 

[jas]

I seem to always get bitten in the butt -- hard and fast -- by karma when I try to call strangers out on their rudeness. Even an eyeroll on my part seems to cause great offense and/or harm and/or escalation. (Although I will concede that I do a heck of an eyeroll). So while I'd love to give a Julia Sugerbaker-tirade to some people -- in traffic, in stores, in elevators, staring at me when I'm trying to wheel two toddlers around -- I have found that, for me, it's best to, as my grandmother would say, "Try to rise above." I don't think I'm better than anyone (ok, I may be better than twits who don't help out people obviously in need of a helping hand), but I do find that when I answer rudeness by calling it out, I never really feel better about it, and often it tends to make me wallow in my own anger about the situation.

I try to think about the classy women I know, and how they would handling the petty rudenesses that face us every day. I am a short-tempered person with very thin skin. I have a lot of opportunities to practice my Grace Kelly-ness (or pick your icon...) every day.

This is not to say I let myself be a doormat. If I'm mistreated, it hurts. If it's going to matter to me in 5 days or 5 years, I will say something.

This is also not to say I never roll my eyes or harumph anymore, but I am trying to let things go and am so appreciative when people aren't staring at their navels and lend a hand, open a door, or don't run me over with their cars.

ETA: This is my experience, obviously. Not trying to comment on how others handle their situations. Oh, and I do think Preggos should not have to deal with harumphing when asking for an empty seat.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl
you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there''s a certain "type" you''re talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

 

[CNOS128]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:01:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM

Author: hisdiamondgirl

you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there''s a certain ''type'' you''re talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

Because that''s rude?

 

[hisdiamondgirl]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:01:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl
you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there''s a certain ''type'' you''re talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

If I sense someone behind me, I just hold the door. I don''t turn around and check to see whether they''re worthy of having the door held for them.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 3/3/2010 2:58:05 PM
Author: jas
I seem to always get bitten in the butt -- hard and fast -- by karma when I try to call strangers out on their rudeness. Even an eyeroll on my part seems to cause great offense and/or harm and/or escalation. (Although I will concede that I do a heck of an eyeroll). So while I''d love to give a Julia Sugerbaker-tirade to some people -- in traffic, in stores, in elevators, staring at me when I''m trying to wheel two toddlers around -- I have found that, for me, it''s best to, as my grandmother would say, ''Try to rise above.'' I don''t think I''m better than anyone (ok, I may be better than twits who don''t help out people obviously in need of a helping hand), but I do find that when I answer rudeness by calling it out, I never really feel better about it, and often it tends to make me wallow in my own anger about the situation.

I try to think about the classy women I know, and how they would handling the petty rudenesses that face us every day. I am a short-tempered person with very thin skin. I have a lot of opportunities to practice my Grace Kelly-ness (or pick your icon...) every day.

This is not to say I let myself be a doormat.

This. 100%. Especially the bolded part. There seem to be two types of people: 1) people who feel like people "got away with something" if you let them pass unscolded ... and 2) people who feel like if you''re driven to SCOLDING means they''ve gotten the better of YOU. YOUR anger has driven YOU to their level. Camp Two for me.

 

[Bia]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:07:05 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 3:01:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl
you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there''s a certain ''type'' you''re talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

If I sense someone behind me, I just hold the door. I don''t turn around and check to see whether they''re worthy of having the door held for them.

this

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:08:09 PM
Author: Bia

Date: 3/3/2010 3:07:05 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 3:01:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl
you've been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there's a certain 'type' you're talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

If I sense someone behind me, I just hold the door. I don't turn around and check to see whether they're worthy of having the door held for them.

this

Well if its this big deal that brings countless annoyances to your days - maybe reconsider? I think its vastly ruder to chide someone for not thanking you than to BE the non-thanker. There's plausible deniability for the non-thanker. Maybe they just got diagnosed with cancer and are deep in thought? The SCOLDER is 100% jerktastic. No excuses.

ETA: Its as bad as demanding apologies. Really? You think its valid if you have to demand it? You think you can BULLY thank yous and sorrys out of people with sarcasm? Its only a TRUE GIFT or TRUE GRACIOUSNESS if you have no expectation of "reward". Y'all are stingy givers.

 

[purselover]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:07:35 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:58:05 PM
Author: jas
I seem to always get bitten in the butt -- hard and fast -- by karma when I try to call strangers out on their rudeness. Even an eyeroll on my part seems to cause great offense and/or harm and/or escalation. (Although I will concede that I do a heck of an eyeroll). So while I''d love to give a Julia Sugerbaker-tirade to some people -- in traffic, in stores, in elevators, staring at me when I''m trying to wheel two toddlers around -- I have found that, for me, it''s best to, as my grandmother would say, ''Try to rise above.'' I don''t think I''m better than anyone (ok, I may be better than twits who don''t help out people obviously in need of a helping hand), but I do find that when I answer rudeness by calling it out, I never really feel better about it, and often it tends to make me wallow in my own anger about the situation.

I try to think about the classy women I know, and how they would handling the petty rudenesses that face us every day. I am a short-tempered person with very thin skin. I have a lot of opportunities to practice my Grace Kelly-ness (or pick your icon...) every day.

This is not to say I let myself be a doormat.

This. 100%. Especially the bolded part. There seem to be two types of people: 1) people who feel like people ''got away with something'' if you let them pass unscolded ... and 2) people who feel like if you''re driven to SCOLDING means they''ve gotten the better of YOU. YOUR anger has driven YOU to their level. Camp Two for me.

I definitely agree with this I don''t particularly care if people don''t thank me for holding the door or things like that. I do it because I like to be nice not so others will validate to me that it''s the right thing to do. Life''s too short to be annoyed over small things.

 

[princesss]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:07:35 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:58:05 PM
Author: jas
I seem to always get bitten in the butt -- hard and fast -- by karma when I try to call strangers out on their rudeness. Even an eyeroll on my part seems to cause great offense and/or harm and/or escalation. (Although I will concede that I do a heck of an eyeroll). So while I''d love to give a Julia Sugerbaker-tirade to some people -- in traffic, in stores, in elevators, staring at me when I''m trying to wheel two toddlers around -- I have found that, for me, it''s best to, as my grandmother would say, ''Try to rise above.'' I don''t think I''m better than anyone (ok, I may be better than twits who don''t help out people obviously in need of a helping hand), but I do find that when I answer rudeness by calling it out, I never really feel better about it, and often it tends to make me wallow in my own anger about the situation.

I try to think about the classy women I know, and how they would handling the petty rudenesses that face us every day. I am a short-tempered person with very thin skin. I have a lot of opportunities to practice my Grace Kelly-ness (or pick your icon...) every day.

This is not to say I let myself be a doormat.

This. 100%. Especially the bolded part. There seem to be two types of people: 1) people who feel like people ''got away with something'' if you let them pass unscolded ... and 2) people who feel like if you''re driven to SCOLDING means they''ve gotten the better of YOU. YOUR anger has driven YOU to their level. Camp Two for me.

I think a person can be split. I''m camp 2 75% of the time. But every now and then I''ve got my panties in a twist about something and I feel like somebody did something intentionally - well, I''ve taken to giving them Haven''s smile. Sometimes, if the person didn''t intentionally do anything (90% of the time so far), they smile back and I realize I''m being an idiot. 10% of the time, they were trying to get away with something and their reaction tells me that they know they''ve been caught.

I can''t say I''m above stooping to their level sometimes. I do. It''s actually part of why I like Haven''s solution so much - when they do smile back, it snaps me out of it. But sometimes I''m rude, and I meet rude people, and we have rude encounters. I''m very impressed that you''re able to consistently rise above it - that''s something I hope I can do eventually.

 

[hisdiamondgirl]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:12:07 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 3:08:09 PM
Author: Bia

Date: 3/3/2010 3:07:05 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 3:01:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl
you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there''s a certain ''type'' you''re talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

If I sense someone behind me, I just hold the door. I don''t turn around and check to see whether they''re worthy of having the door held for them.

this

Well if its this big deal that brings countless annoyances to your days - maybe reconsider? I think its vastly ruder to chide someone for not thanking you than to BE the non-thanker. There''s plausible deniability for the non-thanker. Maybe they just got diagnosed with cancer and are deep in thought? The SCOLDER is 100% jerktastic. No excuses.

ETA: Its as bad as demanding apologies. Really? You think its valid if you have to demand it? You think you can BULLY thank yous and sorrys out of people with sarcasm? Its only a TRUE GIFT or TRUE GRACIOUSNESS if you have no expectation of ''reward''. Y''all are stingy givers.

I didn''t say it was that big a deal. This is a thread about chivalry/rude people and THAT is what I was responding to.

I''ll just drop it and say, about the highlighted part, isn''t this ironic coming from you?

 

[Bia]

Date: 3/3/2010 3:12:07 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 3:08:09 PM
Author: Bia

Date: 3/3/2010 3:07:05 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl

Date: 3/3/2010 3:01:55 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 3/3/2010 2:50:30 PM
Author: hisdiamondgirl
you''ve been to The Westchester so you know exactly who I mean

If there''s a certain ''type'' you''re talking about -- why keep opening doors for them? Just stand back & let them do the heavy lifting ...

If I sense someone behind me, I just hold the door. I don''t turn around and check to see whether they''re worthy of having the door held for them.

this

Well if its this big deal that brings countless annoyances to your days - maybe reconsider? I think its vastly ruder to chide someone for not thanking you than to BE the non-thanker. There''s plausible deniability for the non-thanker. Maybe they just got diagnosed with cancer and are deep in thought? The SCOLDER is 100% jerktastic. No excuses.

ETA: Its as bad as demanding apologies. Really? You think its valid if you have to demand it? You think you can BULLY thank yous and sorrys out of people with sarcasm? Its only a TRUE GIFT or TRUE GRACIOUSNESS if you have no expectation of ''reward''. Y''all are stingy givers.

I know...this was said before...I think the word ''unclassy'' was used.

I disagree with you. I don''t know where you live, but where I live, this is ALL THE TIME. I get annoyed. That''s where HDG''s idea is a good one.