I just wanna say -- the random comments thread

[lisaC]

Hi Tekate,
The boys and I weren’t even invited. Not that we would have gone.
I haven’t spent Christmas with his family these last 5years because after 20 years I got fed up of spending 8 hrs in a car just so he could spend all of his time with his bff his brother in law. 2012 was the final straw. I finally figured out he couldn’t force me to go.
Last year was our 25th anniversary in March. He said we should celebrate our anniversary and both our birthdays by going out to dinner before he had his 2 week solo vacation. I told him not to bother.
It does bother me tremendously but his thought is I am a martyr and I make things out to be worse than they are. So it would be pointless even trying to have a conversation with him.

 

[missy]

This year was a milestone birthday for both me and my husband. I turned 50 a week before he turned 60. He has a contract position in a different state and I picked him up at 9pm. Never during the course of the day did he wish me happy birthday. No present, no flowers, no card, no phone call, not even a text. He asked why I wasn’t more enthusiastic picking him up- Happy Birthday to you too was what I got.

This past weekend he drove 5 1/2 hrs to spend his birthday with his family and his sister threw him a birthday party. :roll

Happy 50th Lisa From PS and PSers to you...wishing you a warm and happy belated birthday.

Hi Tekate,
The boys and I weren’t even invited. Not that we would have gone.
I haven’t spent Christmas with his family these last 5years because after 20 years I got fed up of spending 8 hrs in a car just so he could spend all of his time with his bff his brother in law. 2012 was the final straw. I finally figured out he couldn’t force me to go.
Last year was our 25th anniversary in March. He said we should celebrate our anniversary and both our birthdays by going out to dinner before he had his 2 week solo vacation. I told him not to bother.
It does bother me tremendously but his thought is I am a martyr and I make things out to be worse than they are. So it would be pointless even trying to have a conversation with him.

Sorry about your dh and his family. That is not cool.

 

[missy]

@Sandeek thinking of you and hoping you are getting relief. (((Hugs))) and healing vibes to you.

 

[lyra]

Went to my infusion appointment yesterday. Walked out of the bathroom with my IV cord tucked into my pants in front of everyone in the room! Nurse said, Um I think your cord is hung up on your....shirt. Yeah, like that's possible. I'm so classy and not at all awkward and embarrassing.

 

[missy]

Went to my infusion appointment yesterday. Walked out of the bathroom with my IV cord tucked into my pants in front of everyone in the room! Nurse said, Um I think your cord is hung up on your....shirt. Yeah, like that's possible. I'm so classy and not at all awkward and embarrassing.

Awww lol. If it makes you feel better I once left the bathroom not with toilet paper under my shoe as would be the more common oops but with toilet paper coming out of the waist of my pants. Oops!!!

Hope your infusion went well yesterday!

 

[tyty333]

This year was a milestone birthday for both me and my husband. I turned 50 a week before he turned 60. He has a contract position in a different state and I picked him up at 9pm. Never during the course of the day did he wish me happy birthday. No present, no flowers, no card, no phone call, not even a text. He asked why I wasn’t more enthusiastic picking him up- Happy Birthday to you too was what I got.

This past weekend he drove 5 1/2 hrs to spend his birthday with his family and his sister threw him a birthday party. :roll

I'm so sorry Lisa. I would have been bothered too. It doesnt take much...a text saying "Happy Birthday. See you at 9" would have been a good
start with "where do you want to celebrate your birthday dinner" the next day. Does he just not do birthdays, anniversaries and Valentines Day or
does he just not show love and appreciation in general?

 

[lisaC]

Happy 50th Lisa From PS and PSers to you...wishing you a warm and happy belated birthday.

Sorry about your dh and his family. That is not cool.

Thank you very much Missy!

 

[lisaC]

I'm so sorry Lisa. I would have been bothered too. It doesnt take much...a text saying "Happy Birthday. See you at 9" would have been a good
start with "where do you want to celebrate your birthday dinner" the next day. Does he just not do birthdays, anniversaries and Valentines Day or
does he just not show love and appreciation in general?

Christmas birthdays anniversaries aren’t big in our house

 

[lisaC]

By the time we got out of the airport lot it was 9:15 and he asked where would I like to go eat dinner. Seriously?!! I’d taken the boys out at 7 for a burger we were all hungry.
We did have plans to go out to lunch the next day- to celebrate our son’s birthday on the 12th, mine, his and his aunt’s in between him having to work. Ok I keep thinking I am ungrateful.. But it was a milestone birthday and the last time I got something for me was when I turned 40. I drank much too much beer and came home and took a nap til 6

 

[lyra]

@lisaC Have you communicated your feelings to your husband? I'm the least subtle person ever. If my birthday is coming up, I remind my husband and tell him what I want (if anything), or buy something and tell him it's my birthday present. Same with anniversaries. This avoids the "I'm not a mind reader, I had no idea" conversations that could come up. It may be okay for you right now, but your kids might pick up on things. I've experienced this as a child, and it was difficult to deal with because I loved both parents and one was making the other feel bad.

 

[lisaC]

@lisaC Have you communicated your feelings to your husband? I'm the least subtle person ever. If my birthday is coming up, I remind my husband and tell him what I want (if anything), or buy something and tell him it's my birthday present. Same with anniversaries. This avoids the "I'm not a mind reader, I had no idea" conversations that could come up. It may be okay for you right now, but your kids might pick up on things. I've experienced this as a child, and it was difficult to deal with because I loved both parents and one was making the other feel bad.

I did say I wanted to mark it with a piece of jewelry- he said go ahead and put it on your credit card

 

[lyra]

@lisaC I would and have put it differently. I say here is the number you will call, and here is the item I want, and tell them I'm from PS. He has done this for me a few times. If you offer up the most simple and direct route, then there might be less quibbling. Honestly, I don't know many guys who want to take a chance on buying a gift, let alone accidentally not getting the right thing. My husband gets high anxiety in shopping situations. YMMV. I'm not terribly sentimental. I would rather get what I know I want. I hate surprises.

 

[tyty333]

I did say I wanted to mark it with a piece of jewelry- he said go ahead and put it on your credit card

Put it on YOUR credit card...does that mean you have to buy and pay for your own gift? sad If that's the case, I think I would wait a while before buying anything. I would just want the sour taste out of my mouth. Do a lot of looking around and when you find something that you really love treat yourself.
Its a birthday gift from you, to you, celebrating your accomplishments over the last 50 years. Nothing to do with him...I wouldnt even go out of my way
to show it to him.

I'm sorry he is not more enthusiastic about your big day.

 

[Slickk]

@Sandeek thinking of you and hoping you are getting relief. (((Hugs))) and healing vibes to you.

As always you are so sweet, @missy Sadly I am still fighting this thing along with some impacted molars, still so miserable. Hoping for a resolution soon! Hugs for reaching out to me!

 

[TooPatient]

By the time we got out of the airport lot it was 9:15 and he asked where would I like to go eat dinner. Seriously?!! I’d taken the boys out at 7 for a burger we were all hungry.
We did have plans to go out to lunch the next day- to celebrate our son’s birthday on the 12th, mine, his and his aunt’s in between him having to work. Ok I keep thinking I am ungrateful.. But it was a milestone birthday and the last time I got something for me was when I turned 40. I drank much too much beer and came home and took a nap til 6

You are NOT ungrateful. He took time to go to a party for him that you weren't even invited to. That alone would bother me. He is following this up with two weeks of vacation without you. Seems like he has time for everything in his life but you and it doesn't bother him.

Talk to him. Tell him what you need. Work with a counselor to come up with something you can both live with. Whatever you need.
If he isn't willing to hear AND attempt to address your feelings, you need to decide what you want to do moving forward.

 

[lisaC]

Thank you ladies! I appreciate your replies- i have a lot to think about.

 

[Cozystitches]

Oh my! So, I came home tonight after protesting for additional funding for AZ schools. I figure there a a ton of people here and want to share. Today's protest (lining Broadway for MILES) in Tucson is pretty historic. I'm excited, but super tired. I was tired before I went, but I went because students deserve better. My students should not be afraid of a mouse (or other rodent) falling onto their heads during my genetics lesson (true story). They should not be crammed into rooms that the original occupancy rate was 29, but was magically changed to 39 (not sure how they made the room bigger, because my students haven't gotten smaller). They should have access to a counselor, to technology, to educators who not only care but who don't have to work two (or more) jobs despite having multiple degrees. While I am not going to the capitol, I am going to support downtown in my town.

 

[Tekate]

I hope you find an answer that makes you happy.

I know people in the Jehovah Witness religion don't celebrate anything but wedding anniversaries, or that is what a woman I worked with told me (she was a Witness).. so if your husband comes from this background then you can't do much and maybe you don't want to as you said, it's not big in the family.

One time my hubster went on a skiing TRIP! with his bud from work - off to Telluride, ME? I'm home with the boy, dog and work.. so I went to a jewelry store and had a ring made my little present to myself. If your husband says buy something, you should do it, but make sure it's on his card it's his gift to you!!! (if you share the card then just do it)..

If you marriage is okay aside from these idiotic inlaws and a hubster who doesn't think much of holidays, bdays etc, and you are happy together then it's no biggie!

Do what you want for you and the boys.

Thank you ladies! I appreciate your replies- i have a lot to think about.

 

[missy]

As always you are so sweet, @missy Sadly I am still fighting this thing along with some impacted molars, still so miserable. Hoping for a resolution soon! Hugs for reaching out to me!

Aww Sandeek, I am so sorry you are going through this miserable experience and you are in my thoughts. Hoping you find relief very very soon and sending you gentle hugs. I am here for you however I can be. (((Hugs))).

 

[missy]

Thank you ladies! I appreciate your replies- i have a lot to think about.

My perspective is this. It is not about the birthday, the gift or anything else. It is about making you, the love of his life, his wife, his parter through this life- happy. If it is important to you it should be important to your dh. Pure and simple as I see it.

So the birthday, since it is important to you, should have been important to him. I find it interesting (and disturbing) that his birthday is obviously important to him yet he doesnt look at your birthday the same way?

And him getting you a gift would have meant something to you therefore it was an important thing your dh should have done to show he cares about you and loves and respects you. But make no mistake. This is not about the gift, or the birthday or anything else but the fact that if something is important to you, it should be important to your dh.

I am sorry LisaC. Of course we are strangers on the internet and know NOTHING about your relationship (except what you have shared here) and I don't pretend to know what the right answer is for you but I am with @Tekate.

Talk with your dh. Let him know exactly how you feel. Because if he understands how you are feeling about all this then and only then can he make changes in the right direction to bring peace and harmony to your relationship. As much as we love our dhs they cannot read our minds nor should we expect them to. If he knows and still behaves that way then you need to explore issues further (counseling, etc) but first make sure he gets how you feel. So sorry and sending you good wishes and lots of good luck moving forward for a happier relationship. Hugs.

 

[stracci2000]

It's henna time! Once the cold weather is finally gone, I like to do some henna. It's so much fun to draw on yourself!
Like a tattoo without commitment.

 

[missy]

It's henna time! Once the cold weather is finally gone, I like to do some henna. It's so much fun to draw on yourself!
Like a tattoo without commitment.

I wonder if this would work to make eyebrows where one has none? I am a henna virgin so might not be appropriate at all. This looks very lovely on you Stracci.

 

[Dee*Jay]

Like a tattoo without commitment.

I had a marriage like that once!

 

[stracci2000]

I wonder if this would work to make eyebrows where one has none? I am a henna virgin so might not be appropriate at all. This looks very lovely on you Stracci.

Missy, henna is all natural, and might not irritate you.
My ingredients, besides 100%henna powder, are sugar, lemon juice, and a little brewed black tea. The coloration lasts about 10 days, then fades away.
You could find someone in your neck of the woods, and give it a try. You can buy premade henna paste from most henna artists and apply it at home. Probably a small amount delicately placed
in your brow area would do the trick.

 

[TooPatient]

My jeweler has outdone himself! Just picked up my grandma's ring and it looks like a whole new thing. I mean, same ring but fully restored. Half of the band cut out and replaced with new gold, fully re-pronged, polished to a spectacular shine... Yes, I cried when I got it!

(Pictures when I get a good one)

 

[TooPatient]

Before and after. (Before isn't all that clear, but shank is cracked in two places, prongs are worn to almost gone, gold is super dull.)

 

[missy]

Before and after. (Before isn't all that clear, but shank is cracked in two places, prongs are worn to almost gone, gold is super dull.)

That is beautiful TooPatient! So glad you got the result you wanted and what a wonderful thing for you to do.

Missy, henna is all natural, and might not irritate you.
My ingredients, besides 100%henna powder, are sugar, lemon juice, and a little brewed black tea. The coloration lasts about 10 days, then fades away.
You could find someone in your neck of the woods, and give it a try. You can buy premade henna paste from most henna artists and apply it at home. Probably a small amount delicately placed
in your brow area would do the trick.

Thanks Stracci for the info! I will keep it in reserve for when (hopefully there will be a when and the inflammation won't last forever) my condition calms down. Thank you!

 

[the_mother_thing]

Purging & packing a home of 12+ years ... SUCKS! The suck factor is compounded when said home has been in a state of renovation for 2+ months with floors torn up, furniture & stuff shuffled around as a result, dust (because you can properly clean subfloor), etc. We closed on our new home last Friday, and the movers come this Wednesday morning, so the pressure is on to get the various little/misc items sorted & packed.

Hubby has been an absolute saint, working on items at the new house all weekend to make the new house comfortable & welcoming for DD & my arrival on Wednesday. It will be so nice to finally actually live with and wake up with him every day in the same home, as this past 3 months (since we were married) has been non-stop shuffling back & forth between our two (current) homes ... and not always together. How we have made it to & thru this entire chaotic process without a fight is beyond me, so we really must be perfect for eachother.

 

[AGBF]

It's henna time! Once the cold weather is finally gone, I like to do some henna. It's so much fun to draw on yourself!
Like a tattoo without commitment.

GORGEOUS!!!! Did you know we have some henna tattoos in The Gold Thread? How did you learn to do this, stracci? I am very envious. Another member, telephone, said she had trouble with hers. (Henna tattoos did not show up on her.) I will let her chime in for herself if she sees this thread, but she thought it was because she was so fair complected. Maybe you participated in the thread where she discussed her problem; it was in Hangout.

Deb

Photos from The Gold Thread:

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-46
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-47
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-57

 

[stracci2000]

GORGEOUS!!!! Did you know we have some henna tattoos in The Gold Thread? How did you learn to do this, stracci? I am very envious. Another member, telephone, said she had trouble with hers. (Henna tattoos did not show up on her.) I will let her chime in for herself if she sees this thread, but she thought it was because she was so fair complected. Maybe you participated in the thread where she discussed her problem; it was in Hangout.

Deb

Photos from The Gold Thread:

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-46
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-47
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/do-you-have-a-favorite-gold-designer.29197/page-57

Thanks, Deb! That bridal henna is breathtaking!
I havent been lookiing at that thread because the title says "Designer", and I was thinking it was about VCA, Tiffany, etc.
I better get over there and start posting!
-Deb (I'm Deb too!)