How worried are you that you might get robbed wearing your bling out?

[missy]

I'm always a bit cautious and aware of my surroundings. I live in a very upscale town and there are robbers hanging out at the local Safeway store and swiping women's purses off of their shoulders. I was at a 49'r football game a few years ago with my friend from Germany, while standing outside of my car so that the could smoke () - here comes a guy on his bicycle. Almost ran into me - I was aware of his approach and turned my body - he wanted to rip my solitaire necklace off of my neck. That would have been a tragedy. I try to be aware of my surroundings.

So true. A haunting case comes to my mind when I think about how living in an "upscale" area will not protect you. In fact it was the reason I decided to get a whole house alarm system for our beach house.

https://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/24/nyregion/24slay.html

 

[Wewechew]

So true. A haunting case comes to my mind when I think about how living in an "upscale" area will not protect you.

Not only will it not protect you, but they can become targets because they are "upscale".

 

[icy_jade]

Depends on where I am... not afraid in Singapore as it’s really safe. Feels mostly the same in Hong Kong depending on which area I am... like Central feels safe but not certain neighbourhoods. Kuala Lumpur is really unsafe (as advised by locals/family/friends too so not slamming anyone), etc. In USA or any where else where I’m not familiar with the neighbourhood I’m in I don’t travel with much bling.

 

[lambskin]

Yes, I do wear crappy clothes when we travel. In fact I look like a backpacker and wear no jewelry except for a Timex watch. I love to shop wherever we go. I will enter a jewelry store, oriental carpet shop or other establishments that typically do not have fixed prices. I look around the store and do not accept their help at first. I tell them I will let them know if I want to view anything. The merchants get a pretty good idea of my 'taste' 'knowledge' and 'savvy' when I ask to see certain items in the display cases. Some can not hide their surprise when they say that that is the most expensive item or best quality) or most rare etc. they have. I know it is of good quality as I have done my research prior to shopping. When I try to bargain for a better price and tell them I am a budget traveller (which I am) they reply that my picks belie my 'budget" status. One merchant told my husband that they do not judge how a person is dressed since a tourist has money to travel and has more money than most locals. On the other hand, I was in Guatamala and entered an antique store. I looked like I had just come from a Dead concert. The merchant followed me around the entire time as if I was going to steal something.
In regard to wearing bling in urban areas or abroad, robbers can't tell if it is a CZ or the Hope Diamond. If you attract their attention and the opportunity presents itself they will rob you. Use caution and common sense wherever you go and keep eyes and ears tuned to the situation.

 

[stylistbydesign]

I don't worry about wearing my jewelry (1.9 ct ring), or anything else when I'm out and about, but just try to practice common sense. Honestly, my bags (I have a pretty extensive luxury handbag collection) attract more attention than my jewelry, but maybe that's just because people are more aware of Chanel/Hermes/etc.. I try to be aware, walk confidently, and pay attention (no looking at phone or looking down) to the people and places around me. If I'm junking, thrifting, or negotiating (recent car buying comes to mind), I dress very casually, wear no jewelry, and carry a nylon bag. I think it's good to keep salespeople guessing! I will work with the sales advisors who treat me the same, whether I'm in sweats or in Chanel. I had a similar experience to yours, @ice empress. My favorite Gucci SA treated me so well the first time I met him, and I was in sweats, with my kids in tow. I'm sure I didn't look like someone who was going to make large purchases, but we've had a long and happy relationship in the years since. His manager *still* jokes about how he no idea I would be "a buyer, not a looker". I told him that you never know when lookers will become buyers, so it's best to treat everyone as if they're buyers.

 

[mellowyellowgirl]

I wear a lot of coloured stones and don't think twice about wearing them because I assume people think they are costume jewellery.

Interestingly enough no one asks or says anything about any of my rings except two specific ones. The plain white solitaire gets lots of "Wows it's so sparkly. That's an amazing rock." People seem to know it's real and admire it.

The yellow diamond ring by DBL gets admired followed by "Is it real?"

***

Hehe we are probably considered "riff raff" on our street simply because of how messy we are. We have junk everywhere all over the front porch and the lawn is a hot mess due to our random habit of digging holes and putting in trees whenever we feel like it.

We also had a very angry dog that half the neighbourhood was wary of. There is a house down the road with all these youths who look quite "rough." Once I was out walking Angry Dog, one of the youths crossed the road as he neared us and gave me the JUDGIEST LOOK!!!!!! I ran home to tell Hubs "The rough looking youth JUDGED me babe! He crossed the road because he thought Angry Dog and I were undesirable people!!!!!" I was so miffed!

 

[TreeScientist]

As an offshoot of this question, do you feel that you can get a good deal while wearing large bling? I wonder about this because I am a bargain hunter.

My husband suggested getting a large CZ to see if I would feel comfortable wearing my large diamond that is currently unset. So I wore a 9 mm CZ when we went furniture shopping and I noticed that we were steered towards the most expensive mattresses they had. A couple who came in a little later than us (sans bling) were steered towards the lower priced mattresses. We went to two stores and the lack of transparency on prices and the pushing towards the most expensive furniture (mattress, chairs, sofas) was frustrating and I will probably just wait until the Black Friday sales and not wear bling (real or fake).

I have wondered the same. Usually, if I’m going shopping where negotiations are possible, I will tone down the jewelry and even use a no name purse. (My go to purses are usually Coach so the name is clearly visible.) It’s showing my age, but I think about the episode of the Cobsy Show where Dr. Huxtable goes to buy a new car and dresses in sweats so as not to give the salesperson the idea that he (and his attorney wife) make a very comfortable living. LOL!

LOL, now about treatment. As a guy, wear a suit and sales people and women are naturally attracted to you. So yes I think dress and jewelry makes a difference.

Dress definitely makes a differences in sales situations. Anyone who thinks salespeople don't profile by dress is incredibly naïve haha.

When I'm shopping in situations where bargaining and dealmaking are possible (furniture stores, open markets, etc.), I always dress casually. I don't look homeless, but I try to look as "average run of the mill 20-something" as possible. Usually decent jeans and a v-neck with no watch. Don't want to look poor, as the salespeople may just ignore you in that case, but also don't want to look like you ooze money.

In situations where bargaining isn't possible and I know that staff will determine how "high priority" you are by your dress (high-end department stores, nice restaurants, etc.) I always dress as nicely as possible. I mean, not white-tie tux nice, but I always wear a suit (like @sledge said) or at least nice pants with a blazer. And always a decent watch. It definitely makes a difference.

Good example was this past Saturday. Fiancé and I were in LA visiting a friend and decided to go out to a nice restaurant for her birthday (nice by average-people standards, meaning $50ish dollars a person, not LA-people standards, meaning $200+ a person haha ). I wore a blazer and slacks that I had brought for the occasion, and she wore a nice calf-length dress with heels. The maître d' immediately did the once-over of us and sat us in a nice corner of the restaurant. Looking around the room, it was probably 60/40 between people dressed semi-nicely like us and people dressed more casually. Throughout the night, I could definitely tell that the waiters were kissing way more ass for the nicely dressed tables compared to the causal tables.

I used to hate the profiling, as when I went out as as college student in causal dress I used to think, "Hey, I'm a decent tipper, why are you ignoring me?!" Now I realize that's just the way it is. Basic business psychology. The correlation is not always 100%, but if you're a sales staff/waiter at a high end store/restaurant, there's a much higher chance of getting a commission/nice tip from someone who is well-dressed than someone who looks like a bum. So just comply and dress nicely if you want to get your ass kissed.

 

[LetLoveRule]

My first diamond is being set in my ER so I don't have too expensive jewellery yet. If I feel that it's needed, I'll turn my ring so the diamond isn't visible.

I'm cautious when travelling though. Last year in SE Asia I turned the screen of my smart watch off and kept an eye on my purse, tablet and phone at all times. When travelling in US and Canada I wasn't as cautious but in certain areas of bigger cities like Toronto, New York, Chicago, SF etc I was more aware of surroundings. Luckily I travelled with my partner, so I felt safe.

Here in Australia I don't feel like I have to be as cautious, especially where we live. Crime rates seem to be lower than in Europe where I'm from.

Right after he proposed we went to look at diamond engagement rings (he proposed with "an interim ring"), wearing comfortable clothes as we went for a hike. The sales lady at a jeweller showed us $400 cluster rings I think it's funny how they can be wrong by judging the book by its cover

 

[ice empress]

@LetLoveRule it’s funny, because as I observed and mentioned in an earlier post, we feel comfortable in our hometown while someone visiting that exact same city as a traveler might not. Toronto is where I would feel most comfortable wearing my jewels.

We just don’t think of theft as something that is possible or plausible in our comfort zones, but obviously this isnt actually true.

 

[missy]

@LetLoveRule it’s funny, because as I observed and mentioned in an earlier post, we feel comfortable in our hometown while someone visiting that exact same city as a traveler might not. Toronto is where I would feel most comfortable wearing my jewels.

We just don’t think of theft as something that is possible or plausible in our comfort zones, but obviously this isnt actually true.

I definitely know it is possible and am always aware. It's second nature when you grow up in a big (albeit relatively safe) city. I hope my post before didn't come off as sounding glib because I am vigilant always when out and about. I know bad things happen all the time and I never take my safety for granted.

When we traveled to Italy I did wear my ER and I was also acutely aware of my surroundings. I would do it again because wearing my bling provides pleasure that wearing a travel ring would not. Having said that I would not wear it traveling to all countries but again this is where common sense comes into play. No area is 100% safe and that is a calculated risk I am willing to take. There is no one right or wrong answer to this question as it just depends on one's personal level of comfort.

 

[LetLoveRule]

@LetLoveRule it’s funny, because as I observed and mentioned in an earlier post, we feel comfortable in our hometown while someone visiting that exact same city as a traveler might not. Toronto is where I would feel most comfortable wearing my jewels.

We just don’t think of theft as something that is possible or plausible in our comfort zones, but obviously this isnt actually true.

That makes total sense as you're familiar with your hometown and others may not. You know which areas are safe or not so much whereas a visitor doesn't. This can also be a bad thing as you might get "comfortable" in your hometown and therefore less cautious.
Common sense is what we need in general and luckily PS-ers know the value of diamonds and how to protect their precious belongings.

 

[sledge]

@LetLoveRule it’s funny, because as I observed and mentioned in an earlier post, we feel comfortable in our hometown while someone visiting that exact same city as a traveler might not. Toronto is where I would feel most comfortable wearing my jewels.

We just don’t think of theft as something that is possible or plausible in our comfort zones, but obviously this isnt actually true.

I've been to Toronto and loved it. Decided if I were to defect from the US I would strongly consider there. I was much younger and more of a partier then but remember walking the streets late at night. No issues whatsoever.

Personally I always felt Toronto was much safer and way cleaner than the US.

Only time I felt things could have gone awry was in Chinatown. Not because anyone did anything but because it was crowded and chaotic and it makes it harder for me to analyze people, situations and my potential reactions. But I was in a bigger group with some friends from China and they were speaking their native tongue and lit up like a fat kid in a candy store in many of their interactions. Overall one of my most fun memories of Toronto.

 

[Logan Sapphire]

I work in DC in an area that has rapidly gentrified with lots of tourists, but still has a fair amount of crime. DC police often come to my workplace to give talks on staying safe and aware. One of my friends scared off a mugger in the metro station in daylight, and there have been rapes and robberies all around. On a local forum, someone said she was warned by another metro rider that the group of kids he was standing by were talking about stealing her ring. While my jewelry is certainly more modest than many people's, I sometimes will just wear a band or something more simple when going downtown.

 

[ice empress]

I work in DC in an area that has rapidly gentrified with lots of tourists, but still has a fair amount of crime. DC police often come to my workplace to give talks on staying safe and aware. One of my friends scared off a mugger in the metro station in daylight, and there have been rapes and robberies all around. On a local forum, someone said she was warned by another metro rider that the group of kids he was standing by were talking about stealing her ring. While my jewelry is certainly more modest than many people's, I sometimes will just wear a band or something more simple when going downtown.

Oh my. That’s scary...

It’s such a shame... I wish we could all just wear what we wanted when we wanted without having to have these (justified) fears. As many have noted before, these jewels are meant to be worn and enjoyed...

 

[ice empress]

I've been to Toronto and loved it. Decided if I were to defect from the US I would strongly consider there. I was much younger and more of a partier then but remember walking the streets late at night. No issues whatsoever.

Personally I always felt Toronto was much safer and way cleaner than the US.

Only time I felt things could have gone awry was in Chinatown. Not because anyone did anything but because it was crowded and chaotic and it makes it harder for me to analyze people, situations and my potential reactions. But I was in a bigger group with some friends from China and they were speaking their native tongue and lit up like a fat kid in a candy store in many of their interactions. Overall one of my most fun memories of Toronto.

I always feel safe in Canada... perhaps it’s just a home comfort false sense of security, but perhaps it is because I believe Canada is also safer than many other countries.

I grew up in Montreal and used to walk home from being out at 3 and 4 am by myself without the least concern. I never once felt unsafe. That being said, I wasn’t wearing jewelry back in my university days...

 

[WinkHPD]

My wife and I met in Rio de Janeiro back in the early 70's. About fifteen years ago we took a group of Rotarians to Brasil on a friendship exchange. We traveled through the State of Minas Gerais and really enjoyed our trip with them. At the end we stayed for an extra five days to visit Rio and visit with friends there.

We were both comfortable there and went places that the tourists were advised to avoid, including the neighborhood where Resa had her apartment when we were living in Rio. No problems at all.

However on the next to last day there, we went for a walk about after breakfast. Laughing and talking as we window shopped, enjoying the wonderful weather. I looked up and noticed that across the street was a hillside with shanty shacks on it and I told Resa to pick up the pace and take a right at the next corner to get back into Ipanema proper rather than at the out edge of it, as we were now walking across the street from a favela (slum) and did not belong there.

We got to the corner and were nearly to the next block when the young thief tried to stick his hand into my left front pocket to steal whatever change I might have left after breakfast. Unfortunately for him, I had gained some weight during our three weeks in Brasil and his hand got stuck. I quickly tried to grab his wrist, but turning towards him gave him the slack he needed to pull free and he took off running back towards the favela.

As a former Marine, it never occurred to me not to take right out after him. He stopped to look back and the look on his face as I reached for his neck was worth the entire price of admission, as I am sure he had no thought that an overweight tourist would actually now be on the attack, and less than two feet behind him.

He ducked and took off running across the street and up the hillside. Even in full Marine attack mode, I knew better than to go up that hillside if I wanted to eat lunch and dinner with my wife ever again. I heard some cat calls coming from the hillside as I calmly walked back to where Resa was.

Our friends were appalled that I had even thought about trying to catch a thief. Kept telling me how foolish it was and all the ways I could have been killed or injured. My main thought was, "What the heck would I have done with a twelve to thirteen year old thief if I had caught him?"

It really was my fault for not paying more attention to my surroundings. A heads up check a block earlier would have resulted in never having walked in front of that favela, thus no attack, harmless or not.

It did result in a great headline and sub headline for the next newsletter I wrote:

Wink Mugged in Rio!

The things I do to bring you back the goodies.

(This was back in the days when newsletters were sent out in hard copy rather than the Internet, so the only way I know it was successful is that all of the treasures I brought back were sold in about a week.)

What others have said is always applicable, no matter how comfortable you may or may not be, KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN AND OBSERVE WHAT IS GOING ON AROUND YOU!

Wink

 

[KKJohnson]

Luckily I travelled with my partner, so I felt safe.

This made me giggle because I think my husband travels with me to feel safe

 

[cmd2014]

I think most cities have safe and less
safe places to be (which can change depending on time of day). The difference is that you know where they are where you live, so you don’t have to ask yourself the question about whether or not you’ll be safe like you do as a visitor.

 

[cmd2014]

This made me giggle because I think my husband travels with me to feel safe

Ditto. I’m the mean one.

 

[TreeScientist]

I think most cities have safe and less
safe places to be (which can change depending on time of day). The difference is that you know where they are where you live, so you don’t have to ask yourself the question about whether or not you’ll be safe like you do as a visitor.

So true. Pretty much every city I know has a "shady" area. Heck, even here in Oslo, which is one of the safest cities in the world, we have a shady neighborhood called Grønland. Now, it's not "constantly look over your shoulder in broad daylight" shady (I go to the immigrant fruit/vegetable market there every weekend), but it's shady enough that you would probably want to watch yourself if you were there at night. There's frequent robberies/pickpockets in that area after dark, and even a few killings (although I think the killings were between rival gangs. Innocent civilians rarely get shot here). But tourists really don't know that the area is not exactly safe. Many tourists have this misguided belief that all of Scandinavia is completely safe and that there is absolutely no crime.

I've learned never to have a false sense of security while traveling no matter where you are. That's what thieves pray on: The unaware tourist who is completely out of their element and not watching what's going on around them. And trust me, thieves can easily tell tourists from locals. You don't really need to be paranoid, but if you're even remotely paying attention to your surroundings and you have good "spidey-senses," then you'll get a feeling when you're in a bad area. And just like in @Wink's story, you can usually then take actions to prevent yourself from getting pickpocketed. Most street robbers around the world don't want to use knives or guns that might land them in prison. They're frequently just young guys looking to pickpocket someone who's too busy looking at the architecture.

 

[ChristineRose]

Some forums require mods to approve every post, or to approve posts by new members. Spam bots will copy posts and threads and repost them in hopes of getting marked as a "safe" poster. Often times you'll see a completely intelligent and helpful post on an entirely unrelated thread.

On PS your posts show up automatically. I don't think PS has a list of safe or unsafe posters, I think that you get one shot and then you're just banned. If you see these bogus reposts, just report them.

 

[LetLoveRule]

This made me giggle because I think my husband travels with me to feel safe

My fiancé is twice my size I do the talking though

 

[KKJohnson]

My fiancé is twice my size I do the talking though

Haha!

 

[doberman]

Interesting. I don't tend to think of being robbed for my jewels, but I have worried about being robbed for my car at a particular mall. It's a very upscale mall (Tiffany, VCAa etc) but it's not far from some shadier areas. A couple of years ago a young man was shot in front of his wife and died after being carjacked for his Range Rover Sport. I don't go there very often.

Many years ago the people who put in our alarm system stole my tennis bracelet and a really nice gold tie tack that I'd given my husband. Like a moron I had just left it in a jacket pocket rather than the safe. And I had my small diamond studs stolen by a housecleaner when I took them off to shower. The thief replaced them with some cheap earrings which was bizarre. I confronted him before he left and said that maybe he'd vacuumed them up, could he check. He knew he'd been caught and wasn't going to be able to leave until he'd coughed them up. He was filling in for his father and I felt badly when I had to call him to cancel services and tell him what his son had done. Now all my stuff is in the safe.

 

[sledge]

This made me giggle because I think my husband travels with me to feel safe

Ditto. I’m the mean one.

My fiancé is twice my size I do the talking though

LOL my girl has spunk too. I particularly love the scenarios where I go to the bathroom and come back to see her in a dispute with one or more men and then without a beat she blurts out, "honey, go kick their ass for me so I don't break a nail on their worthless souls!".

I'm not sure if it's my stern look I give them, or the fact they think I'm crazy because of my girl but they always back down and shut up. Which is usually when my girl says something along the lines of, "nothing but crickets now...they're scared of the whippin' I was about to lay down". I smile and say, "I know babe, they had no idea I walked back in the nick of time to save their lives".

 

[LaylaR]

I think it's smart to always be aware of your surroundings. I used to turn my rings around at night, when I was walking on a city street or public transportation.

Then, I was robbed, almost 10 years ago now. The thieves got a lot of my "real" non-diamond pieces. But of my diamonds-- none. They took the CZ/crystal stuff I had instead (it was right after my wedding and I had some nice sim earrings, pendants, etc.). It was much blingier and grabbed their attention, and they somehow missed the diamond ring right next to it!

It made me realize that most petty thieves probably can't tell the difference between a nice sim and a real diamond. And I stopped wearing fake bling on when I travel instead of real. If someone is desperate to hurt me for what might be a CZ it seems like tempting fate to wear expensive looking jewelry at all in certain places.

For the most part I wear my nicer real pieces when we are safer situations-- at people's houses, at restaurants where there is safe lit parking, (Home Depot for their lighting ), and not in cities when I am walking or taking public transportation. And I don't wear sims when I travel or when I go to big busy cities or public transportation at all. I enjoy higher end costume jewelry like Alexis Bittar, etc. And wear those pieces when I travel with a wedding band. That way I am adorned-- but not in anything that tempt a would-be thief.

 

[canuk-gal]

You bet. And I am Canadian.

 

[Wewechew]

This made me giggle because I think my husband travels with me to feel safe

That’s awesome!

 

[PierreBear]

I don't wear my rings when I travel. Partly because of the area but more so I don't want to worry about it. I usually compromise and just wear an eternity wedding band but from one travel experience, learned that I had squeezed the railing so hard on either riding the subway/bullet train/some sort of public transportation that my ring was slightly out of shape. It was fixable but think in the future I'll just wear a plain band and enjoy that vacation!

 

[MrsKBP]

I guess I'm oblivious...I wear my jewelry all the time and also travel quite frequently with it all and have never had a problem. I would consider my main pieces on the expensive side (diamond ring/9.5 ctw, gold charm bracelet w/diamonds and a platinum/diamond Rolex).

I'm sure there are thieves all around but I'm usually in areas I wouldn't feel unsafe in...but I'm sure they're everywhere...

I've been lucky to have never had anything happen to me. I'm my worst enemy...lost my engagement ring. I owe that all to myself.