How frequently/easily do you spot sub-par diamonds IRL?

[RetroTreeGal]

Speaking of filthy rings, I cleaned a family member’s ring (there was noticeable gunk in crevices) and afterward I noticed one of her side stones was loose. I showed her, and then a couple days later the stone fell out. Grime was literally holding it together. She still doesn’t clean it and won’t let me do it anymore because her stones might fall out.

 

[Bron357]

Wow!! What an unlucky, lucky break!! She’s better off! You saved her from a miserable life!!!

Yes, these days I say nothing at all about other people’s rings, just to be on the safe side.

 

[sarahb]

It appears we've all seen dirty rings, & yes--it drives me nuts too! I just cant figure out why you'd have a beautiful (in the eyes of the beholder/owner) piece of jewelry & wear it all covered in gunk. YUK!

Yes, who can't get excited for a young, new fiancee, its a time of pure joy!

I would not say anything to someone about their choice, maybe if they were direct & and pointed with the question--I have been asked a few different times 'why are your diamonds so sparkly', & my answer is always because of ideal cut & cleanliness. But would never offer an opinion unless requested to in the first place--and at that, very gently & kindly.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Don't show me your ugly diamond b/c I'll tell you the truth...

 

[BlingObsession]

It appears we've all seen dirty rings, & yes--it drives me nuts too! I just cant figure out why you'd have a beautiful (in the eyes of the beholder/owner) piece of jewelry & wear it all covered in gunk. YUK!

Oh me too - drives me insane. My friends are all a bit scared now when I visit and either hide their jewels or give them a quick clean before I get there. Clearly I terrify them. hahhaha.

Bling Wipes - love them - keep them in my handbag so when I have an OCD moment, I can whip out my wipes and polish everything in the vicinity to within an inch of its life. They don't work for really dirty gunked up jewels but certainly enough to give the owner a glimpse of what their ring should look like. Don't even get me started on earrings....

Oh and on the subject at hand, yes sadly some of my friends have some diamonds that are less than stellar but I would never tell them that. It's harder still when they ask if they got a bargain. Oh dear.

 

[elizabethess]

Agree with whitewave that I like to give benefit of the doubt and assume most are filthy. I would no sooner comment negatively on the looks of someone's diamond than on the looks of their baby/child. Only a recipe for disaster

 

[Rhea]

I don't notice unless I get a chance to examine rings quite close up. That's a chance I rarely get. Our last friend to get engaged showed me her ring and asked how he did knowing that I have internet friends on a diamond forum. She didn't show me her ring nearly close enough to know anything. Looking at it while it's on her finger and my face is about 9 inches away is as close as I can politely get to most people. I can tell if it's dirty from about that distance, but that's about all unless it's really included or very very poorly cut. Keep in mind our average friend circle has 0.40 - 0.66 ct diamonds.

How are you getting so close to people? Mostly I just hear "eeeeeeek, he's proposed!" and a quick wave of the finger.

 

[baby monster]

One if my coworkers recently upgraded her ER. It's a large stone with high color/clarity but absolutely lifeless. I had a chance to observe it in many light sources and it's cleaned regularly. I congratulated her on the upgrade and anniversary, end of conversation. I would never offer unsolicited opinion.

The most awkward conversations are when people ask if I think they got a great deal

 

[baby monster]

Oh me too - drives me insane. My friends are all a bit scared now when I visit and either hide their jewels or give them a quick clean before I get there. Clearly I terrify them. hahhaha.

Bling Wipes - love them - keep them in my handbag so when I have an OCD moment, I can whip out my wipes and polish everything in the vicinity to within an inch of its life. They don't work for really dirty gunked up jewels but certainly enough to give the owner a glimpse of what their ring should look like. Don't even get me started on earrings....

Oh and on the subject at hand, yes sadly some of my friends have some diamonds that are less than stellar but I would never tell them that. It's harder still when they ask if they got a bargain. Oh dear.

Those wipes are a neat party trick! I wonder how many appreciate being told their ring is filthy

 

[KristinTech]

The dirty ones make me so sad! I love the idea of carrying bling wipes! I was that friend in college that cleaned everyone’s rings before we went out on the weekends. I hardly ever see gorgeous rings where I live. .25 - .5 carat is typical— mall rings. I don’t comment on people’s jewelry, but close friends and a precious few co-workers know of my obsession.

Extended family went out to a big lunch over break. There was an older woman there by herself at a table near ours. I immediately positioned myself so I could glance at her OEC glory. Rings, necklace, brooch....Glittery rainbows everywhere! You could tell she dressed herself up to go out. She looked spectacular! That is very rare for me to see around here. And all spotlessly clean—even rarer.

 

[metall]

The dirty ones make me so sad! I love the idea of carrying bling wipes! I was that friend in college that cleaned everyone’s rings before we went out on the weekends. I hardly ever see gorgeous rings where I live. .25 - .5 carat is typical— mall rings. I don’t comment on people’s jewelry, but close friends and a precious few co-workers know of my obsession.

Extended family went out to a big lunch over break. There was an older woman there by herself at a table near ours. I immediately positioned myself so I could glance at her OEC glory. Rings, necklace, brooch....Glittery rainbows everywhere! You could tell she dressed herself up to go out. She looked spectacular! That is very rare for me to see around here. And all spotlessly clean—even rarer.

Now THAT must have been a sight to behold!

 

[AdaBeta27]

... I wonder how frequently people encounter diamonds in real life that they can tell are sub-par in terms of cut, color or clarity.
...

Where I live, the PS-quality diamonds, or Hearts on Fire, which is the only decent product line one can buy locally are seldom seem. I met one woman with a Hearts on Fire e-ring, and she is the one who brought it up, because she noticed my Brian Gavin diamond and inquired if it was HoF. One woman wears a 8mm Moissanite, and I am certain that less than 1% of local residents could tell Moissanite from diamonds. Mall jeweler and pawn shop fare, most .75ct or less, are what I see. Local women my age are still wearing their original .25 - .5ct they got back in the day. Not many anniversary upgrades here.

What I learned from being on PS is that diamonds come in many colors, and none of those are "inferior" in any way. I also learned how to gladly give up clarity because you can literally get 2x the carat weight you could otherwise afford, and it gives you lots more diamonds to perhaps choose from. Same for being flexible on tint. Or fluorescence. It's all personal preference. I happen to like beautifully cut warm diamonds, even in H&A RB cut, as well as I like the colorless and near-colorless range. Variety is the spice of life.

Performance is another issue altogether. Cut and size are what people notice. (Then maybe color, if they have learned anything about diamonds.) And to me, a dead dull diamond is not worth having. Who cares if it's D IF but cut so poorly that it looks like a glassy bad CZ? I was a '90s bride. Among my co-workers, two had RBs that must have been in the 1.5ct to 1.75ct range but were lifeless and paste-white. There was also a large marquise, probably very shallow but it looked huge, and it was also a lifeless paste-white diamond. Those women had children, and the one thing that I noticed right after the kid(s) came along was that those big glassy e-rings were never seen in the office again, replaced by either plain gold bands or a diamond band with well-cut diamonds.

 

[AdaBeta27]

I’ll share my odd experience from today. A woman came in for her appointment, today, and I noticed her ER...not because it was remarkable, in a good way, but because it was remarkable in a “holy crap! What is THAT?” way.
She had a 1+/-ct center stone (Emerald Cut, I THINK), Set in a pave halo. Her WR is so thin, I thought it was part of the ER. Her center EC (still questionable-it was rectangular) was dark GRAY! Now, it COULD have been a gray spinel...but I was afraid to strike up conversation with her about it for fear it was just a diamond’s worst nightmare! I couldn’t even see the steps on this thing, and it didn’t flash or scintillate...

Back in the mid to late '80s, the local chain-store mall jewelers offered a "1ct for $1999" special. Those diamonds were truly godawful, filled with black pepper inclusions, and sparkled like, um, potting soil. maybe. There were a couple of young women I was in a civic organization with who received those e-rings. When I got engaged in the '90s, the better jewelers each had one of those $1999 ct rings in their showcases, just to show customers what crap looks like!

 

[bmfang]

Back in the mid to late '80s, the local chain-store mall jewelers offered a "1ct for $1999" special. Those diamonds were truly godawful, filled with black pepper inclusions, and sparkled like, um, potting soil. maybe. There were a couple of young women I was in a civic organization with who received those e-rings. When I got engaged in the '90s, the better jewelers each had one of those $1999 ct rings in their showcases, just to show customers what crap looks like!

Here in Australia, the 1ct for low $xxxx is still alive and kicking. Though it may be 1ct for A$2999 or 1ct tcw for A$1999

 

[foxinsox]

Here in Australia, the 1ct for low $xxxx is still alive and kicking. Though it may be 1ct for A$2999 or 1ct tcw for A$1999

Same here in NZ - it’s not often a peppered stone tho but rather a cluster of tightly set small stones to approximate a single stone.

 

[bmfang]

Same here in NZ - it’s not often a peppered stone tho but rather a cluster of tightly set small stones to approximate a single stone.

Over here, the single stones set in a solitaire for AUD$2999 are sometimes peppered (usually highly included, sometimes they are primarily white inclusions, but you do get salt and pepper in the one stone at times).

But more often than not, they are at the extreme end of the cape series (so L-M or below) and are horribly cut (they look lifeless; a CZ would look better!!!). Some also exhibit brown and grey tones when viewed mounted.

The AUD1999 1ct tcw rings are full of very eensy teensy weensy melee that sparkles from some viewing angles and is often set in a number of rows rather than clustered to make the ring appear as a solitaire.

I often shudder to think of the workmanship and the poor lady who buys it/receives it, wears it for a year and then when she brings it back in for the annual checkup and clean, a number of those melee stones fall out in the ultrasonic cleaner...

 

[ChristineRose]

I notice it all the time.

I hate it though, because some of those rings are very dear to the wearer. Sometimes because they love their fiancé so much, sometimes because it was grandma's ring. I just tell myself they are dirty and that anyone who can actually keep their ring clean all the time doesn't have a life.

 

[ericad]

I can't say I have, though I certainly notice when a person's rings sparkle more than average. The other day my daughter was having a haircut with a new stylist we hadn't been to before, and her rings were not super large, but they sparkled like crazy! I noticed, and complimented her on them. Another that comes to mind is one of the moms I know from my daughter's sporting activity - her rings always sparkle like mad, so I notice them. And my own mom, of course, because she owns some nice big old cuts that I chose for her lol.

Did I notice those specific rings because they have a superior cut, or because perhaps the wearer is more diligent about keeping them clean? Maybe these women are PS'ers...maybe the super sparkly ones aren't even diamonds, lol, who knows! I just know they were beautiful on the hand from a distance!

 

[whitewave]

Same here in NZ - it’s not often a peppered stone tho but rather a cluster of tightly set small stones to approximate a single stone.

Same here

 

[HappyNewLife]

my wife never cleans her ring, while I clean mine daily. It drives me nuts, because she's one of those people walking around with an ideal cut diamond that doesn't sparkle and it reflects negatively on ME!

Her rings are so tight on her and hurt her to take off (that is another story), that it's not possible to steal them daily and clean then when I clean mine. I just wish she'd take better care of it. But alas...

 

[mellowyellowgirl]

Her rings are so tight on her and hurt her to take off (that is another story), that it's not possible to steal them daily and clean then when I clean mine. I just wish she'd take better care of it. But alas...

OMG is she one of those people who insist on tight rings?

My BFF is like that! I warned her! She insisted on rings THAT CANNOT SPIN on the finger! They were so tight it was not funny!

Now after giving birth none of her rings fit and she wails about having no jewellery but REFUSES to resize them because she doesn't want them altered! Grrrrrrr

She's looking to get a new ring to mark the birth of the babies and is wanting to insist on MEGA tight rings again! It makes me want to tear my hair out!

 

[HappyNewLife]

OMG is she one of those people who insist on tight rings?

My BFF is like that! I warned her! She insisted on rings THAT CANNOT SPIN on the finger! They were so tight it was not funny!

Now after giving birth none of her rings fit and she wails about having no jewellery but REFUSES to resize them because she doesn't want them altered! Grrrrrrr

She's looking to get a new ring to mark the birth of the babies and is wanting to insist on MEGA tight rings again! It makes me want to tear my hair out!

No- she gained weight and has already had it sized up, but needs to do so again

 

[madelise]

ALL THE TIME.

I have no poker face and know it, so it's really hard for me. People know I love jewelry, and loveee sharing their engagement rings with me. It's like nails on chalkboard for me to see a 1 carat stone that is super awful cut. Or a crappy made pave setting from the mall.

 

[TreeScientist]

The first thing I notice is the size. Cut is next, although in certain lighting conditions it can come first. I remember a lady wearing a fireball of a diamond across a restaurant with spotlighting - and upon closer inspection it was huge, so probably easier to spot. Color is difficult to tell unless it was obviously tinted face up and clarity I can't tell, unless again, very obvious. All this is from normal viewing distance, not looking up close intently for a good minute!

I have had a few acquaintances where the ring was probably not cut well, but I choose to smile and congratulate them on their engagement and ring. What is the point of pointing out something off with their ring when they have already bought it and are enjoying it? It serves no purpose other than to make them feel worse about their ring. If they had approached me for assistance during the shopping process or confided that something is off with their ring that would be a different story, although as @Austina has said, it needs to be done with tact and sensitivity.

This. I've seen a few friends show me their engagement rings up close. I can mainly notice cut if it's really poor (or color if it's like K or L), as an excellent- or even decently-cut stone will have fire with multiple colors in good lighting, whereas a poorly-cut stone looks dull or just shiny white without the fire.

I would never mention anything though, even if they told me the cost they paid (as some men like to do with other men) and I realize they got taken for a ride at a chain store now that I know what people should be paying. Doesn't do anything but make them feel bad, and it won't change the situation anyway.

Just smile and congratulate them.

 

[MTHealthyLiving]

With all the expertise on this forum I wonder how frequently people encounter diamonds in real life that they can tell are sub-par in terms of cut, color or clarity.

Any stories where a friend or acquaintance showed you a stone they were happy with and you could immediately tell something was wrong? Did you tell that friend about your thoughts?

I’m very much an amateur when it comes to diamonds, so at this point I can’t tell much just by looking. But I do look! I seriously am obsessed with diamonds and love to check out women’s rings. It’s the first thing I notice! Lol!
A gal I know just got engaged with a Henri Daussi, and right away I felt it was missing the mark somewhere. The diamond accents kind of sparkle, but the big diamond looks yellow. I know it cost a small fortune, but it just seems off to me. Upon research it seems the way HD cuts diamonds it creates a look one either loves or hates. Let’s just say I won’t be buying a HD. But she loves it and that’s all that matters. I know my diamonds are not even close to perfect, but they mean something special to me. That said, I’m glad I found this forum so that I can learn more and find the best as I upgrade/reset/, etc in the future.

 

[Allisonfaye]

It would be like telling someone they were wearing an ugly dress.

I don't really see most people's diamonds up close. I rarely ask anyone to look and I would have to have my reading glasses on to see well enough to tell.

 

[Vogue]

This thread has shamed me into cleaning my ring, and I thank it for that.

 

[nala]

Ok. So today I stopped by my jewelers. And of course, he has those special lights, tho they seem to not do much to help my ring. Anyhow, a customer walked in wearing a 3.5 carat round with trillions side stones. It looked gorgeous Bc she wore it well. Mostly I was in awe of the size and setting. But on closer look Bc she met me see it, I could see it had a huge table and was not as sparkly as mine. So to answer your question, I think I'm a size whore! And my eyes notice that first. Followed by the setting.