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Grandmother's Engagement Ring - Thoughts?

daydream believer

Rough_Rock
Joined
Mar 3, 2008
Messages
62
Hi everyone :wavey:

Last summer, I posted this thread about engagement ring selection and compromise: [URL='https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/how-much-compromise-with-e-ring.223422/']https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/how-much-compromise-with-e-ring.223422/[/URL] I want to thank everyone for their thoughtful feedback and helpful ideas. My bf and I had a great talk about the whole thing and it turned out that he was mainly worried that I was gravitating towards simple bezels as a preemptive cost-saving measure on his behalf. He ultimately just wants to get me the beautiful ring he thinks I deserve. Since then, we've had a lot of fun throwing around ring ideas and he seems very in tune with what I want.

But recently, my mom threw another variable into the mix by unexpectedly offering us my grandmother's engagement ring. This was a very pleasant surprise for me (although I shouldn't have been surprised - my mom is so thoughtful and I should have known she would do something like this). My grandma was "that person" for me - we were total kindred spirits. I adored her and I still miss her every single day, so this is a wonderful, sentimental prospect.

Here are some notes for consideration:
- While the ring is not 100% what I would normally pick (as per the previous thread, I tend to lean towards simple, YG settings), I've always thought it was very unique and beautiful. It also very much fits my eclectic, bohemian style and I'm a huge softy for family jewelry. I also don't mind mixing metals.
- My bf doesn't LOVE the design but ultimately knows that what I want for my ring is most important (see? He learns! :lol: )
- My mom is totally comfortable with us resetting the diamond into something different if that's what we want to do. This isn't my grandma's original e-ring setting and the diamond started out in a white gold solitaire (my grandparents reset it for one of their milestone anniversaries). My mom said that if we did just take the diamond, she would probably set a sapphire in the setting and wear it as a RHR.

Questions for you:
1) What style/era would you pinpoint this ring as? Is there a term for this style of setting? I'm very curious to learn more about it and I also think the more details I have on it, the more comfortable my BF will be. (I think he'd like being able to say, "This is Daydream's grandma's vintage, X-style engagement ring."
2) If it were you, would you wear it "as is" or would you reset the stone into a setting more to your taste? I don't want to let sentimentality cloud my judgment but I also don't know if setting this stone into a bezel would be a good idea. I will say that it does seem to be surprisingly well-cut and sparkly for an uncerted diamond purchased in the 1940's.
3) Finally, if I kept the ring "as is," what type of wedding band would you wear with it? I love the idea of getting a very thin, plain band and then a slightly wider eternity band to stack with it (since we wouldn't be buying an e-ring, we could spend a bit more on wedding bands :naughty: ). That way, I could also wear just the two bands when I want a blingy, but more understated look. I was thinking of a Jazz style band so I can still scratch that bezel itch, but then I thought that might be too modern for this ring. Thoughts? Any other styles jump to mind?

Here is the ring in question:

grandmas_ring.jpeg
 
Also, you can totally feel free to tell me if you think the ring is too "out there" for an engagement ring. Again, I don't know if sentimentality is clouding my judgment?
 
Well how do you feel about it being your engagement ring? If you like the idea (and since you were close to your Grandmother) then
I say go with it. I would get an antique looking eternity band to go with it. They have some where the stones are in little squares
and the squares are all hooked together that I think would look good with it. You might want to add some milgrain to her ring to
give it more of an antique look.

I was thinking something like these but you may want something bling-yer (and newer).
http://antiqueengagementrings.com/shopping/shopexd.asp?id=6388
http://www.ebay.com/itm/Antique-Deco-Diamond-Vintage-18k-Gold-Embossed-Flowers-Wedding-Band-Ring-Sz-5-5-/371850710574?hash=item5694078e2e:g:upYAAOSwEzxYTu5Y
http://www.ebay.com/itm/1ctH-VS-Single-cut-diamond-vintage-anniversary-band-14k-WG-/192073758341?hash=item2cb87cf685:g:dM4AAOSwa~BYcra9
 
Nothing's too anything for anything.

Just do what you want.
 
I like the ring the way it is. It's unique. I have never seen a thing like it. And great story behind it.
 
IMHO, I would get my own ER. I would pick out the stone and setting with my fiance. The heirloom ring is a nice wedding present from your mom and you could wear it as a RHR -especially on your wedding day and it would count as 'something old'. I have my own ER and inherited my grandmother's. I have two daughters so each one will inherit a ring.
 
If you search retro diamond cluster or retro diamond cocktail, you'll see a similar style of ring. I absolutely adore that style, and think it makes a fantastic engagement ring. I also would totally treasure wearing my grandmother's ring, because I'm named for her and because her marriage was so strong. (My mom has my grand mom's rings and has said I will inherit but she hasn't been able to let go yet, which I understand!).

Thoughts: put it on your right hand, and go try on rings at a store with your left. Compare. Does one make your heart sing? Or: use grandmom's ring for awhile, and have a 5 year plan for another engagement ring from boyfriend for your anniversary, and then you can alternate. (I suppose you have to be ok with having multiple wedding ring sets, which I am).

And I just read the first couple posts so far on your other thread, but I'm completely on team the ring wearer gets what the ring wearer wants, and it is a heck of a lot more romantic to *listen* to your spouse than it is to surprise them. IMO. That said, if your BF feels like it is a ring that symbolizes your grandmom instead of him, I'd do what I could to change that.
 
I love your grandmother's ring! I think it would make a beautiful engagement ring! However, you have mentioned 'bezel' so many times in your initial post that I wonder if this is truly where your heart lies in terms of an engagement ring. I don't think bezelinf your grandmother's ring will do it for you because it will be different than how you remembered her with it, especially with your close connection to her. Since you and your boyfriend have been looking for rings, what comes to the forefront of your mind as a ring that you feel like is yours already? That is the ring that should be your engagement ring.

Whichever way you decide to go is sure to result in a beautiful engagement ring. You just have to make sure that you are getting the engagement ring that is right for you. :wavey:
 
I think its a lovely vintage ring. I can think of a couple options.

- Leave it as is as others have said and use as a RHR or alternate ering.
- remove the stone and use it as part of a 3 stone bezel ering for you so you have some of you and some of her....
-Explor how it might look turned 180 for use as an alternate wedding band, so that the straighter part is facing out then see how it looks with a simple ering or 3 stone ring.

All of these are possibilities that would intrigue me, as I love vintage things (but fully admit to being a bling addict as well).

Even as a RHR I would develop a "stack" around it and I have no issue at all with mixing eras. In fact, I think styling contrast looks cool and I do it all the time so that things look "fresh" instead of "old fashioned". (Get a thin bubble ring- they modernize things in a good way and go with everything!) My own e-ring is a platinum fishtail prong ring, but with a modern stone, and I stack all sorts of things with it from antique style to modern (bezel bands look fab...and the bubble ring...don't forget that handy piece...)

ngbling3.jpg

eringbezel.jpg
 
Another vote for leaving it and it's beautiful! You can always have a matching band made for the other side that has the floral swirl like the top of the ring or go for a plain band. These were super popular during that time period and are actually making a come back. People want unique and different and due to $ many people are opting out of what our era has seen as 'traditional' rings. If you love it, rock it. If you don't get something different and keep it as a RHR. What a blessing to have something so beautiful being passed onto you!
 
tyty333|1487808027|4132356 said:
Well how do you feel about it being your engagement ring? If you like the idea (and since you were close to your Grandmother) then
I say go with it. I would get an antique looking eternity band to go with it. They have some where the stones are in little squares
and the squares are all hooked together that I think would look good with it. You might want to add some milgrain to her ring to
give it more of an antique look.

I was thinking something like these but you may want something bling-yer (and newer).
http://antiqueengagementrings.com/shopping/shopexd.asp?id=6388
http://www.ebay.com/itm/Antique-Deco-Diamond-Vintage-18k-Gold-Embossed-Flowers-Wedding-Band-Ring-Sz-5-5-/371850710574?hash=item5694078e2e:g:upYAAOSwEzxYTu5Y
http://www.ebay.com/itm/1ctH-VS-Single-cut-diamond-vintage-anniversary-band-14k-WG-/192073758341?hash=item2cb87cf685:g:dM4AAOSwa~BYcra9

Thanks for the input Tyty! I love those wedding band ideas, especially that first one. I used to think I wanted a diamond eternity band as an engagement ring, so I feel like accepting my grandmother's ring and then getting a fabulous wedding band would be up my alley.
 
kenny|1487809183|4132361 said:
Nothing's too anything for anything.

Just do what you want.

You're absolutely right and thanks for the reminder. It is my hand and I should put whatever I want on it :wavey:
 
AprilBaby|1487816365|4132402 said:
I like the ring the way it is. It's unique. I have never seen a thing like it. And great story behind it.

Thanks AprilBaby! I too love things that are a bit unique.

lambskin|1487817576|4132415 said:
IMHO, I would get my own ER. I would pick out the stone and setting with my fiance. The heirloom ring is a nice wedding present from your mom and you could wear it as a RHR -especially on your wedding day and it would count as 'something old'. I have my own ER and inherited my grandmother's. I have two daughters so each one will inherit a ring.

That's a good point and I'm sure my mom would be open to that too. I should add that my BF just started his own business so the idea of using this ring now and then getting a brand new ring for a 5 or 10-year anniversary appeals to me too.

phancynan|1487822686|4132444 said:
Thoughts: put it on your right hand, and go try on rings at a store with your left. Compare. Does one make your heart sing? Or: use grandmom's ring for awhile, and have a 5 year plan for another engagement ring from boyfriend for your anniversary, and then you can alternate. (I suppose you have to be ok with having multiple wedding ring sets, which I am).

That's a great suggestion and I think that's the direction I'm leaning. As I mentioned above, BF is getting his business off the ground right now and I don't mind waiting a few years for a mega-rock from him :)
 
CRYSTAL24K|1487823606|4132445 said:
I love your grandmother's ring! I think it would make a beautiful engagement ring! However, you have mentioned 'bezel' so many times in your initial post that I wonder if this is truly where your heart lies in terms of an engagement ring. I don't think bezelinf your grandmother's ring will do it for you because it will be different than how you remembered her with it, especially with your close connection to her. Since you and your boyfriend have been looking for rings, what comes to the forefront of your mind as a ring that you feel like is yours already? That is the ring that should be your engagement ring.

Whichever way you decide to go is sure to result in a beautiful engagement ring. You just have to make sure that you are getting the engagement ring that is right for you. :wavey:

Thank you Crystal24K! I agree that I don't think bezeling this stone will be the best path. From a completely non-sentimental view, I just don't think the stone is big enough and I worry it would get swallowed up in anything other than the most delicate bezel.
 
bunnycat|1487826499|4132452 said:
I think its a lovely vintage ring. I can think of a couple options.

- Leave it as is as others have said and use as a RHR or alternate ering.
- remove the stone and use it as part of a 3 stone bezel ering for you so you have some of you and some of her....
-Explor how it might look turned 180 for use as an alternate wedding band, so that the straighter part is facing out then see how it looks with a simple ering or 3 stone ring.

All of these are possibilities that would intrigue me, as I love vintage things (but fully admit to being a bling addict as well).

Even as a RHR I would develop a "stack" around it and I have no issue at all with mixing eras. In fact, I think styling contrast looks cool and I do it all the time so that things look "fresh" instead of "old fashioned". (Get a thin bubble ring- they modernize things in a good way and go with everything!) My own e-ring is a platinum fishtail prong ring, but with a modern stone, and I stack all sorts of things with it from antique style to modern (bezel bands look fab...and the bubble ring...don't forget that handy piece...)

ngbling3.jpg

eringbezel.jpg

Now those are some stacks! I love that bubble band - I actually have a similar one pinned on my Pinterest board. I really like the mis-matched look - something about it screams elegant, casual and a little bohemian all at the same time :)
 
I think it is lovely as it is and it will have meaning when you look at it.
 
vintagelover229|1487858363|4132522 said:
Another vote for leaving it and it's beautiful! You can always have a matching band made for the other side that has the floral swirl like the top of the ring or go for a plain band. These were super popular during that time period and are actually making a come back. People want unique and different and due to $ many people are opting out of what our era has seen as 'traditional' rings. If you love it, rock it. If you don't get something different and keep it as a RHR. What a blessing to have something so beautiful being passed onto you!

Thanks VintageLover229! A custom band is a really fun idea - I'd love something that is similar but a little bit different.

When you acquired your beautiful sapphire ring (which I stalked on Grace's site for the longest time!), I really appreciated your post about your newfound attitude towards jewelry. Your message about simplifying hit home for me and that's kind of what I'm going for here. My bf just started his new business, we're both young and we have great aspirations to travel, so the idea of accepting a beautiful family heirloom and then using the funds to create experiences together really appeals to me at the moment.

Gee, the more I respond to everyone, the more clear everything is becoming. Funny how that works! :wavey:
 
daydream believer|1487864605|4132560 said:
vintagelover229|1487858363|4132522 said:
Another vote for leaving it and it's beautiful! You can always have a matching band made for the other side that has the floral swirl like the top of the ring or go for a plain band. These were super popular during that time period and are actually making a come back. People want unique and different and due to $ many people are opting out of what our era has seen as 'traditional' rings. If you love it, rock it. If you don't get something different and keep it as a RHR. What a blessing to have something so beautiful being passed onto you!

Thanks VintageLover229! A custom band is a really fun idea - I'd love something that is similar but a little bit different.

When you acquired your beautiful sapphire ring (which I stalked on Grace's site for the longest time!), I really appreciated your post about your newfound attitude towards jewelry. Your message about simplifying hit home for me and that's kind of what I'm going for here. My bf just started his new business, we're both young and we have great aspirations to travel, so the idea of accepting a beautiful family heirloom and then using the funds to create experiences together really appeals to me at the moment.

Gee, the more I respond to everyone, the more clear everything is becoming. Funny how that works! :wavey:

Thank you so much! Now that I have the matching band all is right in my world. But hubs thinks the market isn't doing hot so instead of diamonds I get to spend money on heavy high carat gold pieces, so don't let that sell of the big old pretty stone fool you. I've massed quite the gold collection in a short time LOL!

I am SO happy to hear people actually read my posts and that my experiences helped another. It is so easy to get caught up in all the unique and beautiful (and expensive) high quality pieces here. Every person in my family except one has an heirloom ring and quite frankly, I'm a bit sad I don't too! They are daintier but have a history of love you can't get past. I realize they aren't for everyone but the fact they have family who are so willing to share a part of their history (and sometimes the $ side of things, people don't like to part with things they can sell/get cash for) is a very touching gesture. A new business and travel will be fun. A custom band (or maybe hunting vintage stores for a band on your travels ::) would be a very fun experience. Someday after you really REALY know what you want and the business has gotten off the ground, and you are at a place in your life you find yourself still wanting or get enjoyment out of an anniversary wedding set that will be a fun process to also do.

I find that many of us from the younger generation have an expect it instant attitude, I realize its not all but we have on demand netflix, shop on demand and get it right when you see it-instant communications via text and email. I'm not sure what a young couple in love would do without skype or facetime! Can you imagine being a war bride waiting at home for the postal person eagerly reading your love letters over and over and over? While I think its romantic I think many young couples would be not so thrilled with that LOL!
I take it for granted too, hubs travels for work and I still get to hear his voice while he's away.

I can't tell you how much I adore that ring, how nice it looks on your hand and how if it had been presented or offered to me I would have been moved to tears at such a gesture. But that's just where I am at in my life. At one point I may have scoffed and though that it wasn't good enough for me and gone a different route. I was a different person in my youth-and not one I'm very proud of (not saying that wanting a different ring is a bad thing, I just mean in general I wasn't a kind person due to childhood and trauma in my early years). I'm so glad that I have changed and can see the beauty in many ways others don't.

If you want help hunting for a band via ebay or rubylane hit me up. The thrill of the hunt is a one I love!

Congratulations on the new business and the upcoming wedding!
 
I love that ring. It is unique, I wouldn't take out the stone.

eta I see that you have already decided not to, yay! Have fun picking out a beautiful band to go with it.
 
I don't know if this is weird or not, but I remember your original post very well. I'm so happy to hear you and your bf are moving in a good direction with it all!

I am hugely sentimental, so if it were me, I would most definitely want to incorporate the ring somehow. It sounds like you're leaning towards wearing it as is, and I think that's a lovely idea. I tend to like different and unique things so the fact that this ring is just that is only a plus in my book!

If you are still considering creating your own ring, I think the idea resetting your grandmother's stone as a sidestone in an idea with great possibilities. There are a lot of beautiful things you could do with a three-stone bezel.
 
I have my grandmother's engagement ring, and I LOVE it and the idea of feeling connected to her when I wear it. Honestly, I think your grandmother would love that you wear her ring as it is, or if you redid it with the center stone. Either way, it's so special to have something of your grandmothers to wear every day. Wear it in good health!
 
What a special ring! And if you ever decide down the road you want a different ering, I think it'd still be lovely as a RHR or possibly converted to a pendant.

daydream believer|1487864605|4132560 said:
Gee, the more I respond to everyone, the more clear everything is becoming. Funny how that works! :wavey:

:lol: I hear you! Oh boy, I looooove talking things out, to the occasional chagrin of my significantly less-talky DH. Having like minded folk who are happy to process with you is a blessing :D
 
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