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Got any jokes?

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 30, 2005
Messages
27,714
You shouldn't ask your husband to use your vacuum because he assumes it starts the same way his gas lawn mower does.

tenor.gif

Kenny ... looking for his flame suit.
 
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Rockdiamond

Ideal_Rock
Trade
Joined
Jan 7, 2009
Messages
8,053
A guy is hitchhiking- someone stops to pick him up.
Once they start to drive the passenger says
“ That was brave picking me up -thanks!”
“Brave.....why?” asks the driver.
“Well, I could be a homicidal maniac”, says the hitchhiker.

“I wasn't worried" says the driver. "What’s the odds of there being TWO homicidal maniacs in this car at the same time?".....ooof!!
 

canuk-gal

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 19, 2004
Messages
20,150
HI:

Why couldn't the pumpkin cross the road?

Because he had no guts.

cheers--Sharon
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 30, 2005
Messages
27,714
Ego walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "I need to see your ID".

When I asked Siri why I I've never found love she turned on my iPhone's front camera.
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
30,947
Screen Shot 2019-11-21 at 7.04.34 AM.png

All true but for me the "who in the world is calling me at 9PM is more like who in the world is calling me at 8PM. :lol:
 

missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
30,947
Screen Shot 2019-11-21 at 7.04.49 AM.png
 

kenny

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 30, 2005
Messages
27,714
Did'ja hear about the guy who was killed by a shark during his honeymoon?

The poor guy didn't suffer long.
He was only married three days. :lol-2:
 
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missy

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
30,947
bobcat.jpg
 

princessandthepear

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
Aug 26, 2015
Messages
588
A thief entered a house mid-afternoon. He tied up the woman and at knife-point asked the man to hand over the jewelry and money< The man started sobbing and said, "Brother, you can take anything you want but please untie the rope and free her."
Thief: "You must really love your wife!"
Husband: "No, she is my neighbor"s wife. My wife will be home soon."
 
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