Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alternative

[Upgradable]

It has been suggested that we mature posters start a dedicated thread here in FHH, and if there is enough to discuss they may consider starting a designated forum for issues related to aging. So....... let's see if we can keep a train of though going long enough to make a dent.

I hope I remember starting this thread.

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

As a woman in her mid to late 40's, I find myself discovering new things daily. Well, that's not really true. I'm rediscovering the things I forgot I discovered last week. Like I need to get more vacuum bags. Why can't I remember to get vacuum bags before I pull it out to suck up the 1/2 layer of dog hair that is covering the living room carpet?

I'm also rediscovering new places to misplace my car keys. Why would they be on the back of the toilet? And I'm not even going to tell you how long it took me to find them!

And if there were any fairness in the universe, the fact that I forget to eat breakfast and lunch, and then suffer a major hypoglycemic event while running errands which can most quicky be medicated by a quick stop at Cold Stone Creamery, I would LOSE weight instead of gain. ::sigh::

 

[lulu]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

57 here and loving this idea. I often feel like a dinosaur around here-who cares what I think about their wedding dress? When my friends were getting married we bridesmaids were wearing "picture hats"and halter dresses.

I need help with this aging thing. I can't believe the stuff that's happening. I woke up today with a new bump on my thumb joint, what's up with that?

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

What kind of bump? My skin has started developing all kind of weird spots and things. Sometimes I think I must be turning reptilian. I used to have the greatest skin!! But now I hate being sleeveless or in shorts. It's gross!! Thankfully my face skin is still nice. However, I have a great giant zit right in the middle of my forehead! Where is the justice?

 

[lyra]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

What kind of bump? My skin has started developing all kind of weird spots and things. Sometimes I think I must be turning reptilian. I used to have the greatest skin!! But now I hate being sleeveless or in shorts. It's gross!! Thankfully my face skin is still nice. However, I have a great giant zit right in the middle of my forehead! Where is the justice?

Consider it a patina? I've reached the carefree stage. I know my flaws but I've had them long enough to be comfortable enough not to limit clothing choices, especially in this weather ugh! I may not go to the mall in my beat the heat ensemble, but around the house and neighbourhood I just don't care.

 

[dragonfly411]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

I am not older, but I wanted to share a quote with you ladies that I found thought provoking. Recently Penelope Cruz was quoted as saying "Getting older is a good thing because it means you haven't died yet right?". At first I thought of it as slightly offensive, but then I thought about the accomplishment behind this. You've survived. You've lived a life. You probably have experiences and memories that cannot be replaced. You are continuing to survive into old age. You are accomplishing new things in that as well. You have made it through trials and tribulations, and you have defeated those. You may or may not have conquered illnesses or injuries that in another era you wouldn't have been able to. I hope that I can live to be older to say or think something like that.

Just wanted to share, and I hope it's ok for some of us youngsters to lurk so we can learn from you all.

 

[lyra]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Thanks for that thought Dragonfly. I think my carefree attitude is partly a mask for an anxiety I have. I am 48. My dad died at 52, my mom at 65 and my brother this year at 54. I just don't think I'll be around till I'm 80, you know? It gives a person a different perspective to think they may be reaching the end of their lives, especially when there is still so much to do and enjoy. I accept all the choices I've made, I just hope I have the time left to see my daughters through their big milestones.

 

[risingsun]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Uppy~the post you made on the thread in the hangout is spot on. I have tried offering help in LIW and BWW and it's as if were a ghost. What I have to say is irrelevant. The Hangout is too open to jokes and insults by people who haven't been where we are and don't take it seriously. I am glad we are trying this and you have my full support. BTW, I have those spots, too. I haven't worn a bathing suit or short skirt, in warm weather, in years! Too bad, because I have great legs

I big puffy heart you!!

 

[soocool]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Yeah! Finally can talk to people who will truly understand me!

I will be 54 in a couple of months. I just can't believe it. Seems just like yesterday I was in high school. (nope not gonna cry)

I have had a few friends who died in past few years. Two from cancer and one from heart failure. I myself had to get a pacemaker put in this year for heartblock. And here I thought I did all the right things to stay healthy. Always eat right, exercise, etc. This just bit me in the butt and somedays it is just frustrating knowing I have this little bionic buddy that keeps me alive. Ok got that off my chest. It is just that sometimes it reminds me that I am getting older and makes me think of my mortality more often since I already died once in February.

As to the weird skin stuff. I have these red dots (hematomas??? or??? I have no idea what they are called) that are popping up all over my body. I get so jealous seeing how nice and smooth my daughter's skin is. She hates the heat so stays in the shade or indoors as much as possible. I tell her that my skin(though no wrinkles) could have been better had I stayed out of the sun.

Give me a minute and I will think of more stuff. I keep forgetting stuff..

 

[soocool]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Here's another one. It's weird being with your daughter and knowing that the guys (even the old geezers) are looking at her instead of you. I miss that!!

 

[risingsun]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

soocool~I have the red dots and my derm said that it's nothing to worry about it. I have brown circles/patches, which are raised, on my legs and arms. Mainly on my lower legs. Being in the sun makes them worse and increases the number. They are a form of keratosis. Because I have recurrent skin cancer, I have to be very careful about being in the sun, in general. My last skin CA was a melanoma, so my doctors are watching me like a hawk. I'm so sorry you are dealing with all of those medical problems. I am, too. I sometimes wonder how much longer I can hold it together. I don't have a terminal illness, but there is so much wrong that I find it difficult to manage it all.

 

[Sparkalin]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Just a few years ago I was a working woman taking care of my children. Now I'm a 54 year old with a bad back taking care of my grandchildren. What happened? My 80 year old in-laws live with us as does my 40 year old sister. My husband had a major heart attack this May. Thankfully he is fully recovered and back to work. I don't generate any income and most of my time is spent taking care of others. Not what I expected many years ago, but life doesn't always go as planned. And I'm ok with that. Since plan A didn't work out, I'm on plan B and working on C and D. Of course if I don't write it down I won't remember anyway. And I've got those red spot things going on too. Did I mention the gray hair on my head and the black hairs on my chin?

Linda

 

[soocool]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

RS, sorry to hear about your skin cancer. One good thing about being our age is that many of the things that people died from before now are treatable.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Recently Penelope Cruz was quoted as saying "Getting older is a good thing because it means you haven't died yet right?"

She's allowed to say that because she will likely look exactly the same when she's 80.

 

[packrat]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Recently Penelope Cruz was quoted as saying "Getting older is a good thing because it means you haven't died yet right?"

She's allowed to say that because she will likely look exactly the same when she's 80.

bwahahaha so true!

I'll be 36 in October-am I too young to hang out w/this crowd? I have a lot of those weird red dot things too all over me, if I need some kinda badge to enter or anything. Oh, and my boobs are saggy and one is lower than the other.

 

[gemgirl]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

soocool~I have the red dots and my derm said that it's nothing to worry about it. I have brown circles/patches, which are raised, on my legs and arms. Mainly on my lower legs. Being in the sun makes them worse and increases the number. They are a form of keratosis. Because I have recurrent skin cancer, I have to be very careful about being in the sun, in general. My last skin CA was a melanoma, so my doctors are watching me like a hawk. I'm so sorry you are dealing with all of those medical problems. I am, too. I sometimes wonder how much longer I can hold it together. I don't have a terminal illness, but there is so much wrong that I find it difficult to manage it all.

You can hold it together for as long as you have to because you're a very strong woman, a very intelligent woman and an absolute trooper! Why? because it sure beats the alternative. Besides, there are sooooo many more diamonds to be bought and enjoyed. I'm just sayin'.......

 

[gemgirl]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Darn, it's my aging brain. I wanted my first post here to be "yayyyyyy Uppy!" Thanks for starting this thread. I'll think we'll be a sticky in no time. We just have to spread the word .

 

[junebug17]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

I can relate to so much that's been written already that I hardly know where to begin...

Thank you for starting this thread Upgradable! I plan on being a very active participant. I recently turned 50 and this thread is going to be such a source of comfort and support for me. I too am overwhelmed by the issues related to getting older, and it will be so nice to have a place to go to receive and give support. and to make each other laugh! I've already almost spit out my coffee after reading some of the comments here. What great senses of humor you ladies have!

Getting older is definitely an interesting phenomena. Heck, I just bought a pair of diamond studs off ebay because they fit into my current budget, and I don't want to waste any more time waiting for something I would really like to have! How many years do I have left to enjoy pretty jewelry? I know, it's morbid and depressing...but I also feel that it's realistic. And the good news is I really like the earrings, and they're giving me a lot of joy.

You know, sometimes, if I listen very carefully, I can hear a clock ticking. It's very faint, more like annoying background noise, and usually I can distract myself from hearing it. But there are times the ticking reaches a level where I can't ignore it, and it scares me a little. It's nice to know there's a place I can go at these times, where there's a decent chance someone will understand.

well, I guess it's pretty obvious by now that turning 50 has hit me like a Mac truck! I promise that my future posts won't be so heavy. These are just thoughts that have been on my mind, so thanks for letting me share!

 

[Matata]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Old Geezer reporting for duty! Fifty five yrs. old. Just recently achieved post-menopausal status. For years I wanted to be done with periods and all the unpleasant personality altering side effects associated with it. Then the Big Irony hit. I need those darn hormones I was so impatient to be rid of. Things dry up and stop working without hormones. Like my libido.

And speaking of libido, how unjust is it that men have Viagra & Cialis -- creating just what the earth needs, a huge cadre of horny old men and yet research is so far behind on something similar to help women. Fer cryin' out loud.

Let's talk memory or lack thereof.

Let's talk memory or lack thereof.

Let's talk memory or lack thereof.

Am I repeating myself? Sorry, LOL.

 

[gemgirl]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Old Geezer reporting for duty! Fifty five yrs. old. Just recently achieved post-menopausal status. For years I wanted to be done with periods and all the unpleasant personality altering side effects associated with it. Then the Big Irony hit. I need those darn hormones I was so impatient to be rid of. Things dry up and stop working without hormones. Like my libido.

And speaking of libido, how unjust is it that men have Viagra & Cialis -- creating just what the earth needs, a huge cadre of horny old men and yet research is so far behind on something similar to help women. Fer cryin' out loud.

Let's talk memory or lack thereof.

Let's talk memory or lack thereof.

Let's talk memory or lack thereof.

Am I repeating myself? Sorry, LOL.

High five Matata! I'm 55 also. I can sympathize. I kept hearing from doctors that as soon as I hit menopause, my near twenty year bout of Endometriosis would disappear because it's estrogen that feeds Endo, BUT, when the estrogen disappears, so do a lot of other things. Fortunately for me, despite the fact that my estrogen is in the crapper, I still have my libido. Unfortunately, it's the rest of me (physically) that checked out a few years ago.

There are too too many of what my husband calls "stiffy commercials" on during dinner time. Is that ALL men think about? "When the moment comes........ be ready". Oh pahleez!!!

 

[risingsun]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

soocool~I have the red dots and my derm said that it's nothing to worry about it. I have brown circles/patches, which are raised, on my legs and arms. Mainly on my lower legs. Being in the sun makes them worse and increases the number. They are a form of keratosis. Because I have recurrent skin cancer, I have to be very careful about being in the sun, in general. My last skin CA was a melanoma, so my doctors are watching me like a hawk. I'm so sorry you are dealing with all of those medical problems. I am, too. I sometimes wonder how much longer I can hold it together. I don't have a terminal illness, but there is so much wrong that I find it difficult to manage it all.

You can hold it together for as long as you have to because you're a very strong woman, a very intelligent woman and an absolute trooper! Why? because it sure beats the alternative. Besides, there are sooooo many more diamonds to be bought and enjoyed. I'm just sayin'.......

Thanks for the support, GG. I'm not negotiating this developmental milestone very well. I recently had to write off an old friend and my daughter and I are communicating my email only. Her choice. My resilience is slipping away. Of course, another piece of bling couldn't hurt, you devil you

 

[risingsun]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

I love your cartoon, Matata

 

[soocool]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

I have been in menopause since I was 48 and was happy that I would never have a period again, but then all the talk about how estrogen protects the heart, etc. I felt that I should have had a few more years before I became menopausal. Then I see my DD with bad cramps last week and then I remembered why I was happy it ended.

 

[tyty333]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

48 and happy to be here! No major complaints (well at least not today)! I like the idea of a thread for us
"more experienced" PSers.

 

[lulu]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

The bump on my thumb feels like a cyst. And last year I developed a piece of painful extra cartilage on my ear. The dermatologist said it happens to older people who put too much pressure on their ears when they sleep. (?????) They actually make a pillow with a hole in it for this condition. I had to put steroid tape on it for months, but it seems to be disappearing. None of this stuff is major but it's a reminder that I am changing into a woman of a certain age.

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

OH, I LOVE ALL YOU OLD BROADS!! I KNEW THERE WAS A NEED FOR A PLACE THAT WE COULD POST ALL OUR SHIZZLE WITHOUT GETTING PATRONIZED, CONDESCENDED TO, OR LAUGHED AT BY DF.

Now be patient as I go back, quote, and respond to all of the posts that I feel compelled to comment on.

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Consider it a patina? I've reached the carefree stage. I know my flaws but I've had them long enough to be comfortable enough not to limit clothing choices, especially in this weather ugh! I may not go to the mall in my beat the heat ensemble, but around the house and neighbourhood I just don't care.

Lyra, it can only be considered a patina by those of us whose macular degeneration is gaining ground. When I can see it, I just call it fugly!

Although I have crossed the boundry between being fashion conscious and being comfortable. Ten years ago we moved from the upper midwest to Oklahoma. There is no place on the planet that is more horrible than August in Oklahoma!!!! I no longer care what my upper arms look like, I'm wearing a tank top. I don't care that I haven't shaved my legs in a week and a half, I'm wearing shorts.

In fact, I think we should consider bringing back the mumu, or the housedress. Remember those tacky cotton print things that our mothers/grandmothers wore that snapped up the front and had two big pockets (always full of used and shredded tissue, btw)? They were completely shapeless but they were worn every day but Sunday. I'm think they're a helluva good idea! Minimal undergarments necessary, and I'll use those tissues to wipe the sweat off my forehead (or under my boob pits, if noone is watching).

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Here's another one. It's weird being with your daughter and knowing that the guys (even the old geezers) are looking at her instead of you. I miss that!!

I work at the high school where my kids attend. I'm always laughing and joking with the kids. It broke my heart the day DD said, "Mom, you're not always as funny as you think you are."

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

soocool~I have the red dots and my derm said that it's nothing to worry about it. I have brown circles/patches, which are raised, on my legs and arms. Mainly on my lower legs. Being in the sun makes them worse and increases the number. They are a form of keratosis. Because I have recurrent skin cancer, I have to be very careful about being in the sun, in general. My last skin CA was a melanoma, so my doctors are watching me like a hawk. I'm so sorry you are dealing with all of those medical problems. I am, too. I sometimes wonder how much longer I can hold it together. I don't have a terminal illness, but there is so much wrong that I find it difficult to manage it all.

And it is always so much worse when you have no one to talk with about it. And I mean just talk, not look for sympathy or strategies, not with any expectation of making it better. But sometimes just being able to say to someone, "today is really hard" makes things somehow a little easier.

 

[Upgradable]

Re: Getting older isn't so bad when you consider the alterna

Just a few years ago I was a working woman taking care of my children. Now I'm a 54 year old with a bad back taking care of my grandchildren. What happened? My 80 year old in-laws live with us as does my 40 year old sister. My husband had a major heart attack this May. Thankfully he is fully recovered and back to work. I don't generate any income and most of my time is spent taking care of others. Not what I expected many years ago, but life doesn't always go as planned. And I'm ok with that. Since plan A didn't work out, I'm on plan B and working on C and D. Of course if I don't write it down I won't remember anyway. And I've got those red spot things going on too. Did I mention the gray hair on my head and the black hairs on my chin?

Linda

what I just wrote to Risingsun x2