Fur Baby Prayers

[missy]

Missy, I really hope you don’t beat yourself up over her last day. I’m going through this with my cat right now, and it’s given me a lot of time to think about how fragile life is and how little control we really have. There’s only three ways it can go down: too early, on time, or too late. That’s a roughly 33% chance to get it right if you want to really oversimplify things. It doesn’t help that some days they seem to feel a lot better and it gives you hope, only to have it all go up in flames when they get worse. The roller coaster makes it nearly impossible to know exactly when the right time is. We’re setting ourselves up for disappointment by thinking that we can succeed, though we must try.

It’s funny, today I had a stranger ask me why I hadn’t put my cat down already when I mentioned she was dying. It had to explain that if she still has enough fight in her that you would have to hold her down for it, then it’s probably too soon.

Anyway, I’m wishing you find your peace sooner than later.

Thank you so much @JPie for sharing what you are going through. I am so very sorry about your sweet kitty. You are right. So completely right. Life is fragile and precarious. And it is going to be either too soon or too late. Very slim chance we would get it just right. And we would never know if we did it too soon how much good time she could have had left.

You are a sweet and wise woman and I appreciate you coming here to share with me. I am so sorry about your sweet baby and I am keeping you an your cat in my thoughts and prayers. And sending you gentle (((hugs))).

 

[missy]

I am so sorry, missy. I just read this thread in its entirety today. Until I saw the notice about Francesca in another thread I did not know that this thread, which I had never opened, was about her. It was heartbreaking to read and was clearly beyond heartbreaking to live. I want to say that you and Greg will be OK in time, but I cannot say it truthfully. The reason I didn't open the thread with the title this one had was that I didn't want my own heart broken again. I feel that every loss we relive through someone else's loss reopens our own wounds. We can love again, but we never fully heal from the losses of the animals we love.

Big hugs,
(((missy and Greg)))
(((Francesca and Bobby)))
Deb

Thank you dear Deb. You are such a sweetheart. (((Hugs))). I am so very sorry about your loss(es). I know how deep the pain and grief goes and how long it lasts (forever).

However with time I was able to get to a place where I could remember my grandma and my Billy with more happiness than sadness and pain. It took a very long time. I don't remember how long.

With Francesca the pain seems even more intense. Why that is IDK. Or it could just be my poor memory and perhaps the pain was this intense each time.

In any case I will hold onto the fact that we were so lucky to have her in our life for even that brief time and pray that we did give her a wonderful loving home where she knew how much she was adored and cherished and loved. And I hope she is at peace now and I pray there is a Rainbow Bridge and she is playing with all the beloved furbabies now gone and with my darling grandma too. Because in my version of Rainbow Bridge all my loved ones are there including my loved humans.

I agree we never fully heal but our hearts are endless in their capacity to love and with each loss there is scar tissue but the heart expands to let in more love for others who need our love and companionship.

(((Hugs))).

You are so wise. I was worried for a long time that I wouldn't know when it was the right time to put down my Lab, Biscuit, in 2010. Then, I am so glad to say, he bit me when I tried to lift him to go outside to urinate. I knew, then, that it was time. What a gift he gave me!

Hugs
(((JPie)))
Deb

Sending you so much love and healing wishes and so sorry about Biscuit. And so glad he let you know when it was time. That is a gift.

 

[missy]

HI:

That is a very good picture, Missy. An armful of cats! Such fuzzy goodness.

You will love her always. And that is a good thing. Talk about it, cry about it, but please be kind to yourself--as you know guilt is a useless emotion. Healing vibes across the miles......

kind regards--Sharon

Thank you dear kind wise Sharon. Furbaby love is (one of the) best kind of love. Pure and straightforward and genuine and limitless. Blissful love.
(((Hugs))).

 

[missy]

A few more photos.

With one of my closest friends. We have been friends for 34 years now. He loved Francesca and she loved him.



Gazing up at us with those eyes. Oh those eyes. Saying I love you Mommy and Daddy and we would of course respond in kind. We never could resist that sweet sweet face.


Sitting on my lap during our car trips back and forth to the beach house. She was a pampered little girl.

 

[missy]

We are still going through Frankie photos and I remember how close she stayed to me when I was housebound for over 4 months with my broken bones.
She was so loving and so sweet and so loyal. I couldn't run with her and play with her the same way but she stayed by my side.

 

[missy]

A dear friend from college sent this to me yesterday and I am going to share it with you guys because I find it poignant and so true.

https://www.getold.com/from-pauls-p...Ws6VbXWOlZnW0OveQ2bUKxVbfhh04k9U8xPqycgq0fU9E

When my little black cat, Reed, had to be euthanized recently, I was surprised by how hard her death hit me. Over 14 years, we had certainly bonded.


Found abandoned in an alleyway in Manhattan, she was clearly the runt of the litter, and she remained petite and kittenish up to the end.

At the time we adopted her, I was in a stressful transition – moving from one role to another inside my company – and I had to study intensively if I was going to pass rigorous certification exams. Almost 60, I hadn’t taken a serious test in decades.

Reed was my constant companion – a “study buddy” – climbing into my lap or onto my shoulders as I pored over textbooks.

When I retired several years ago, she remained my little six-pound sidekick. I started a one-person public relations consulting firm and called it Black Cat Communications. Whenever I left the house, she’d sit at the door, more like a dog, and keep a vigil. Whenever I returned, she’d race out the door and run straight into my waiting arms. She was sweet-tempered, friendly with everyone, and perplexed when visitors, including canines, were stand-offish.

In her last year, she developed cancer. We took every reasonable medical step to save her. But on the final day, when I decided it was kinder to let her go, my wife and I wept as we held her in our arms one last time.

I’m not one to overly anthropomorphize an animal. But it's been reported that contact with a pet releases oxytocin, a hormone associated with human affection. Having a pet, especially in later years, can be an antidote to stress, anxiety, and loneliness.

Connecting across species without words requires empathy. In war, soldiers often “adopt” a stray dog or cat, allowing them to express gentler feelings; I’ve seen it happen myself, in Vietnam.

Simply put, I believe animals make us better people.

Still, I was reluctant to let people know how deeply I was grieving. For one thing, how can you compare the heartbreak of losing a pet to the sadness of losing a friend? For another, you can’t expect everyone to be sympathetic. One well-meaning friend said, “Well, it’s just a cat.”

Not to me.

I’ll never forget the comfort she provided in times of stress – or the joy on a sunny spring day. Watching her bound across the yard in hot pursuit of a butterfly, or perched atop the refrigerator, observing curiously, as Patty prepared a meal. And even as she slowed in her later years, it thrilled me every time she burrowed under a blanket to get close on a cold winter night.

It’s hard to know how grief may affect you until you’ve experienced it. If someone had told me when I first laid eyes on Reed that I’d feel this way, I’m not sure I would have believed them. But sometimes, in our grief, we’re freer to realize the full impact of our relationships.

I’m admitting it. I loved her, I miss her, and she’ll be in my heart forever.

And our photo of Francesca which looks eerily similar to Reed's photo. Not all black kitties look alike but this made me chuckle a little bit because well am I right? Reed and Frankie are posing very much the same in their respective photos.

Francesca


And like the author we love Francesca, we miss Francesca and she will be in our hearts forever. But we will be reunited again one day.

 

[Luvallgems]

@missy More prayers and good thoughts for your furry babies