Ering vs. RHRs... do you have "rules"??

[msop04]

@msop04 i think you're right that the color would not show as well without the halo for contrast. I have a slightly darker stone in a solitaire and people do not see the yellow until I point it out. I think you chose the perfect setting to let the diamond shine fwiw. I could see it as a lovely pendant also.

Thanks, @bludiva! I agree 100% about the setting... it's perfect for the stone! When I first showed my coworkers the ring (they'd already seen the stone loose), they were like, "Wait, that's not the same diamond! It looks way darker than the one you showed us... are you sure that's the same one??" So, yes, on it's own, it's not that beautiful champagne color that I love.

 

[msop04]

It’s too late to edit my post above, but I wanted to add that it could make a beautiful bangle too. I’d opt for bangle over pendant if you were interested in a conversion, as I’d want to be able to see such a beautiful colour stone myself!

It would look amazeballs in a bangle, but I don't wear bracelets, so that's not an option for me...

 

[msop04]

I have no rules other than whatever is on my dominant hand has to be durable and lacking in pointy parts. I have to handle animals on occasion and don't want to cause any injury. Otherwise, I wear what I like whenever I like. I've inherited and had made a variety of items that I like to mix and match. I tend to wear my wedding band on one or the other hand daily. But, everything else is optional. On the cost, IDK. If you've owned your house for a long time and yet have increased family income -- you may have a larger percent on your finger over time as you move out of the income sucking parts of your life (e.g., kids, paying for school, house, etc.).

I'm not in the ORRTA camp. I like what I like and will wear it. I have gemstones that are larger and more spready than my ering. I wear them on my RH when my workday allows. I also have a very clear limit to how much height off my finger I like, that that inherently limits the size of the stone unless I move into more spready fancy cuts to gain spread without height.

If I had more 'normal' sized fingers, I'd probably end up the Imelda Marcos of vintage rings...

I wish I could be the same way with rings, but... ya know. LOL I do like that my halo is set very low when compared to my ering (not that it's high at all), so it makes it very comfy.

 

[rockysalamander]

I wish I could be the same way with rings, but... ya know. LOL I do like that my halo is set very low when compared to my ering (not that it's high at all), so it makes it very comfy.

We are all allowed to feel as we do. Its what makes PS fun and informative.

None of the jewellery mavens in my life really focused on the "ering". Rather, they focused on the jewels in their life. So, it clearly influenced me to just accept each gem for its own merits. Maybe that will help my pocket book in the end (or on LOL).

 

[nala]

One last suggestion. Could you modify your rhr setting for your ering and create a 3 stone look for your rhr? It seems like you have no problems wearing a 3 stone on your rhr? Or, how about modifying your rhr into a 3 stone similar to the Tiffany circlet ( I think that’s what it’s called) that still preserves the halo look, but eliminates the airline o it shrinks in size? You might feel more comfortable knowing that you are wearing a more traditional look?

 

[mockturtle]

Would stacking a five stone or eternity ring to up-bling the left hand help?

 

[msop04]

One last suggestion. Could you modify your rhr setting for your ering and create a 3 stone look for your rhr? It seems like you have no problems wearing a 3 stone on your rhr? Or, how about modifying your rhr into a 3 stone similar to the Tiffany circlet ( I think that’s what it’s called) that still preserves the halo look, but eliminates the airline o it shrinks in size? You might feel more comfortable knowing that you are wearing a more traditional look?

I'm not really wanting to dismantle the setting, but thanks for the suggestion!

 

[msop04]

Would stacking a five stone or eternity ring to up-bling the left hand help?

I've thought of that... however, it seems the more I have with my ering, the smaller that diamond looks - HA!! My fave is the plan tri-wire band... it seems like that look makes my diamond look the largest. However, I do wear a bezeled eternity sometimes.

I'm thinking maybe the best route would be a big blingy five stone ring as a RHR... if I end up deciding to sell this OEC (:: tear , I may save up and buy one. Thanks for the suggestion, @mockturtle! (and I love your screen name, btw) LOL

 

[december-fire]

Much easier to find a rich BF!...

My independent nature prevents me from clicking 'Like'.
I'll get therapy to get over that.

 

[december-fire]

@msop04 ,
This is a real issue, so don't apologize.
We're on PS, not at a convention about world conflict, etc.

I hope that the more you wear your new ring, the more comfortable you'll feel about it.
However, if not, then do what's right for you. Your jewellery is meant to bring you joy. Not make you feel uncomfortable.

Do you think the attention from others is because this is a new ring and they've seen your e-ring before?

 

[mockturtle]

I think you will always get more comments on your light brown halo ring just because it's different and unique. But I bet real diamond lovers are quietly staring at and paying more attention to your e-ring.
I really hope you'll keep the halo ring as is. It's too beautiful to change or let go.

 

[msop04]

@msop04 ,
This is a real issue, so don't apologize.
We're on PS, not at a convention about world conflict, etc.

I hope that the more you wear your new ring, the more comfortable you'll feel about it.
However, if not, then do what's right for you. Your jewellery is meant to bring you joy. Not make you feel uncomfortable.

Do you think the attention from others is because this is a new ring and they've seen your e-ring before?

Thanks, @december-fire. That could be it... however, several have said (not knowing it would make me crazy, of course) that the new RHR is "prettier" and "fancier" than my ering. Even though I probably would've come to the same conclusion, these comments just made me cringe a little.

 

[msop04]

I think you will always get more comments on your light brown halo ring just because it's different and unique. But I bet real diamond lovers are quietly staring at and paying more attention to your e-ring.
I really hope you'll keep the halo ring as is. It's too beautiful to change or let go.

Thank you, @mockturtle... I hope I decide to keep it as well.

 

[JDDN]

Aw, I empathize with your conflicting feelings. I've been there too (for different reasons). It's a new ring, so people are naturally going to comment on it because of that and it is 'different' than what a lot of people may be used to seeing. But it matters most how you feel and you should feel great and happy with your pieces.

 

[Slickk]

@december-fire said what I was thinking that perhaps because it is new, it's garnering more attention. After all, everyone has seen your gorgeous ering.

I also do think it's the ornate, detailed nature of the oec halo (& that ~12mm spread!!) which is drawing people's attention to it in a good way. There is just so much that is in the elements of that ring as to bring comments whereas a soli is more often seen, even if regular people don't or can't appreciate the care you put into the cut and cvb setting. I think it's classic and yet something you see often. The oec is unique and interesting.

I also second what she Decemberfire said in that jewelry is supposed to bring joy, certainly not angst, and you should do whatever is right for you and your lifestyle. I personally would feel uncomfortable with both rings also especially in my profession (teacher), so I totally understand. Best of luck!

 

[kgizo]

I think most people feel like you do. I like to wear a lot of jewelry and don’t worry if the RHR is bigger than engagement. I also rotate 3-4 rings on my engagement finger. A lot of days I decide how many total carats I want to wear and then pick out the pieces that add up to it. 10, 15, 20 carat days can be fun and a little over the top. Kind of a Liberace approach to jewelry I like your approach of wearing both for a week and see how how you feel and if it grows on you.

 

[msop04]

Aw, I empathize with your conflicting feelings. I've been there too (for different reasons). It's a new ring, so people are naturally going to comment on it because of that and it is 'different' than what a lot of people may be used to seeing. But it matters most how you feel and you should feel great and happy with your pieces.

Thank you, @JDDN... I appreciate that.

 

[msop04]

@december-fire said what I was thinking that perhaps because it is new, it's garnering more attention. After all, everyone has seen your gorgeous ering.

I also do think it's the ornate, detailed nature of the oec halo (& that ~12mm spread!!) which is drawing people's attention to it in a good way. There is just so much that is in the elements of that ring as to bring comments whereas a soli is more often seen, even if regular people don't or can't appreciate the care you put into the cut and cvb setting. I think it's classic and yet something you see often. The oec is unique and interesting.

I also second what she Decemberfire said in that jewelry is supposed to bring joy, certainly not angst, and you should do whatever is right for you and your lifestyle. I personally would feel uncomfortable with both rings also especially in my profession (teacher), so I totally understand. Best of luck!

Thanks so much, @Sandeek! I think both of you are right about the fact that it being ornate and large may be the reason for the added attention.

 

[msop04]

I think most people feel like you do. I like to wear a lot of jewelry and don’t worry if the RHR is bigger than engagement. I also rotate 3-4 rings on my engagement finger. A lot of days I decide how many total carats I want to wear and then pick out the pieces that add up to it. 10, 15, 20 carat days can be fun and a little over the top. Kind of a Liberace approach to jewelry I like your approach of wearing both for a week and see how how you feel and if it grows on you.

10-20 CARATS??!! WHOA!!! I want to play in your jewelry box!!

 

[AprilBaby]

I don’t like wearing a ring that is bigger ct weight on the right but with my bracelet I don’t mind total ct weight on the right to be more.

 

[LLJsmom]

@msop04 I think I know how you feel. I seldom wear my Tiffany soleste because as a RHR it definitely Is blingier than my ering. I don’t like that. So I don’t wear them at the same time. In fact I learned that I don’t like anything that draws any attention. so the only RHR I will wear are rings with no stones, colored stones or diamonds.

I am sure someone already suggested this but can you wear it as an alternative ering?

 

[msop04]

@msop04 I think I know how you feel. I seldom wear my Tiffany soleste because as a RHR it definitely Is blingier than my ering. I don’t like that. So I don’t wear them at the same time. In fact I learned that I don’t like anything that draws any attention. so the only RHR I will wear are rings with no stones, colored stones or diamonds.

I am sure someone already suggested this but can you wear it as an alternative ering?

We share the "no ring shall be blingier than my ering" mentality, @LLJsmom...
I guess I could wear it as an alternative ering, but I know I wouldn't. There's no alternative for me... it's the ering or nothing at all! HA!

 

[SimoneDi]

@msop04 in my eyes you have always been "rock it guurl" kinda person so I am surprised that you feel that your ahhh-mazing new right hand ring is overshadowing your gorgeous e-ring
In my view both diamonds/rings are beautiful. A gorgeous and white 3.33ct ring will always be more impressive in my view and I don't really see it in a competition with your oec at all. Most people nowadays love halos, so it is really no surprise that they noticed your new ring and commented on it, but whooo cares?!? You have two amazing and sizable rings, wear them, enjoy them! I know you said "no" multiple times to the alternative e-ring idea, but how about wearing the right hand ring some days with simple bands on the left hand. I think the issue is with wearing both rings at the same time, that causes too much competition. Can you try giving your e-ring a day off? I have been without an e-ring since March and I have been re-discovering some of my costume jewelry and also "going back to the basics" it is amazing what a simple band and a statement right hand ring can do!
In any case, best of luck with whatever you decide to do. In the event that you do not want your new ring, I am sure that there will be many people here who would love to have it

 

[kenny]

Rules Schmules!

Wear whatever you want.

 

[msop04]

@msop04 in my eyes you have always been "rock it guurl" kinda person so I am surprised that you feel that your ahhh-mazing new right hand ring is overshadowing your gorgeous e-ring
In my view both diamonds/rings are beautiful. A gorgeous and white 3.33ct ring will always be more impressive in my view and I don't really see it in a competition with your oec at all. Most people nowadays love halos, so it is really no surprise that they noticed your new ring and commented on it, but whooo cares?!? You have two amazing and sizable rings, wear them, enjoy them! I know you said "no" multiple times to the alternative e-ring idea, but how about wearing the right hand ring some days with simple bands on the left hand. I think the issue is with wearing both rings at the same time, that causes too much competition. Can you try giving your e-ring a day off? I have been without an e-ring since March and I have been re-discovering some of my costume jewelry and also "going back to the basics" it is amazing what a simple band and a statement right hand ring can do!
In any case, best of luck with whatever you decide to do. In the event that you do not want your new ring, I am sure that there will be many people here who would love to have it

Thanks, @SimoneDi, you're too kind! I'm wearing my RHR again today, and I'm pleasantly surprised that I'm warming up to it a little more. Yay!! I totally get what you mean by swapping hands and giving my other ring a break too -- but if I wear anything, it's my ering -- I reserve any RHR for "dressier" or "professional" days! HA!

It's funny you mention bands... I've noticed that when I put my plain band with my RHR (or ering, for that matter), it suddenly appears "smaller" and my ering alone looks larger by comparison! Is that crazy or what?? LOL So I think the addition of any band can diminish the presence of a single ring to me... which is why I think I prefer my thin, plain band with my ering most days. Well, it's also possibly that I've really lost my marbles!!

I'm going to give it another week or so to see how I feel before making any decisions I'll regret...

 

[nyquestioner]

I've been thinking about your dilemma. I sometimes wear a large solitaire or nice sized colored stone halo on my right hand, but my e-ring is a fairly modest 3 stone (center 1.2), which I think makes a difference for the look. I tried putting on the solitaire on one hand and the halo on the other and it did bother me a bit. I think both solitaires and halos work best if the other hand has a three stone, five stone, large eternity, or stack of bands. Then it complements rather than competes. Do you have a stack you like but never wear? Maybe once a week that could go on your ring finger instead of your solitaire and that day would be your RHR day. You also may love your solitaire even more if you take occasional days off like that!

 

[Begonia]

I'm going to solve this for you. Wear the RHR as your engagement ring occasionally. Change is good, change is healthy.

Now you're going to be left with a bare right finger. Worry not. I think the purchase of another RHR is in order. Try to keep it on the smaller side. Just do your best with that. No pressure.

Shall we start another thread for the hunt for the new ring or shall we just continue here?

 

[msop04]

I've been thinking about your dilemma. I sometimes wear a large solitaire or nice sized colored stone halo on my right hand, but my e-ring is a fairly modest 3 stone (center 1.2), which I think makes a difference for the look. I tried putting on the solitaire on one hand and the halo on the other and it did bother me a bit. I think both solitaires and halos work best if the other hand has a three stone, five stone, large eternity, or stack of bands. Then it complements rather than competes. Do you have a stack you like but never wear? Maybe once a week that could go on your ring finger instead of your solitaire and that day would be your RHR day. You also may love your solitaire even more if you take occasional days off like that!

Thanks for your reply, @nyquestioner! I get what you mean, but I think the issue I'm facing is a little different. I struggle with my feelings that one ring overpowers or "outshines" the other. Since I feel like a solitaire makes a stone look largest, a three stone would certain add bling, but I'm not sure if I'd like it better than my solitaire... and I don't have desire, much less the money, to change out my setting. HA! What I've realized is it's all perception and it's very much individualized... so until mine changes or "adjusts", I'm still going to feel how I feel, KWIM?

 

[msop04]

I'm going to solve this for you. Wear the RHR as your engagement ring occasionally. Change is good, change is healthy.

Now you're going to be left with a bare right finger. Worry not. I think the purchase of another RHR is in order. Try to keep it on the smaller side. Just do your best with that. No pressure.

Shall we start another thread for the hunt for the new ring or shall we just continue here?

No can do, @Begonia... it's ering or nothing for this crazy chick! HA!! However, if you'd like to start a collection for msop's RHR 2.0, I take no issue with that!

 

[HappyNewLife]

Some want a big flashy halo for both, some reserve the "flash" for a RHR... others just don't care ("bling is bling")...

I'm definitely a "one-ring-to-rule-them-all" (ORTRTA) gal when it comes to my engagement ring. Also, I always want my ering to be the star, and I'd gladly sell every piece of jewelry I own, as well as my soul (kidding! - sort of...), for a big honkin' diamond for my ering and call it a day!

It seems that if I'm wearing a RHR that even remotely "competes" with my diamond, I'm constantly comparing and second guessing. I don't know if being left-handed has something to do with it or not (is this even a thing, or am I only trying to justify my insanity over this??)... or maybe it's comments by friends/coworkers/etc... but I just can't deal if I feel like my RHR outshines my wedding set.

I recently purchased a faint brown OEC that I wanted for a "neutral" and warmer RHR. DK made the most stunning airline halo for it, and I can't imagine another setting that could possibly show off its beauty more than this setting. It's seriously perfection.

...but then I start the comparisons with my ering, and I'm inside my head. Although my soli is 9.8 mm and the OEC is 7.7 mm, the airline halo adds a lot for a total of 12.9 mm of real estate. Clearly, my diamond is significantly larger -- I know that. But the fact that the RHR is flashier (halo) and larger overall is really bugging me... I haven't been wearing it. At all... and it's making me sad. I just can't seem stop the comparisons and feeling like my ering is playing second fiddle. Crazy, right?? Pretty darn good problem to have, yes?? I mean, WTH is wrong with meeeeee???!!!

I'm almost embarrassed to post this, because it sounds like such a ridiculous first world problem -- or even worse, not a problem at all, and I'm just a complete freakazoid.

Does anyone else have rules and/or struggle with some sort of delicate "Ering vs. RHR" balance... or is it just me and my crazy?

I like my e-ring to be a solitaire that stands out on my left ring finger (with my wedding band too). I don't actually have other big diamonds, but if I did I'd probably halo them for a RHR to make them look different than my e-ring. I rarely wear a RHR, though I do love my eternity ring (1.5ct) I purchased for the right hand. I was my hands so many times a day that it annoys me to have TWO hands with rings that are always wet underneath the bands.