E-Ring Dream to E-Ring Nightmare in the Diamond District

[whitewave]

No need to pass blame or label others (thin-skinned?). 30K is not a laughing matter and even if it's just $300 -- it would be a cause of concern to me.

From one adult to another -- this world would be a better place if people communicated positively and openly -- that is how my SO and I are going through this and we are fine. If you put your words positively and caution others directly, it may be taken better, instead of labeling others and demeaning those who "made mistakes"

Nobody likes negative nancy and debbie downer

Around where I live, not much more than 30k can get you a small house!

Consumers don't expect to be taken advantage of by seller, but rather educated and informed with clear and open communication and policies.

This may be a cautionary tale for all who read at a later date. I'm sure OP and her FI would rather that not be true.

I look forward to the conclusion.

Fwiw, I overpaid for a pair of antique earrings, but I did so willingly because I fell absolutely in love with them at auction and simply couldn't bear the thought of someone offering more than my low start offer, so I paid full price for them. I did that willingly and likley overpaid by several hundred dollars. It was truly an emotional purchase..l saw my daughter wearing them on her wedding day. But what can I say? I knew what I was doing and I did it willingly. This is a much different situation and experience than what happened to OP's fi.

 

[Hephephippo]

There is no such thing as a new stone. New stones are a billion years old; old stones are 3 billion.

As for being pre-owned, about 40% of all stones are pre-owned. The percentage varies a lot depending on cut, origin, etc. There's a limited number of sources (mines) for diamonds; everything eventually goes into one of the pipes that branch out to the individual stores. This is a large part of why it's so hard to resell a diamond.

If the cert is six years old, it's possible the stone was sold and returned/exchanged, or it's possible it just sat in a vault for a while. It happens. There's no reason to re-cert unless the stone was chipped or whatever. If the stone was chipped, then the cert is invalid and you can get your money back. The appraiser will tell you this, but I think it's unlikely that any store would try to sell a $30,000 stone with a cert they knew would be called out by an appraiser.

Hi and thanks! We certainly will know after the appraisal. Just to note the e-ring is not 30k. SO paid roughly 30k for the E-ring, and wedding bands. However thanks for the advice.

 

[whitewave]

There is no such thing as a new stone. New stones are a billion years old; old stones are 3 billion.

As for being pre-owned, about 40% of all stones are pre-owned. The percentage varies a lot depending on cut, origin, etc. There's a limited number of sources (mines) for diamonds; everything eventually goes into one of the pipes that branch out to the individual stores. This is a large part of why it's so hard to resell a diamond.

If the cert is six years old, it's possible the stone was sold and returned/exchanged, or it's possible it just sat in a vault for a while. It happens. There's no reason to re-cert unless the stone was chipped or whatever. If the stone was chipped, then the cert is invalid and you can get your money back. The appraiser will tell you this, but I think it's unlikely that any store would try to sell a $30,000 stone with a cert they knew would be called out by an appraiser.

I could see a 5 carat J/k/L FL sitting in a vault because it was hard to sell, but not this stone. Hopefully the seller will clarify.

Also, the stone was not 30 k. He also bought the setting and the wedding band.

Since so many people own diamonds, it is highly debatable to call them rare-- rare compared to what?

 

[whitewave]

HE, he bought his wedding band also? Is it a plain band or what?

 

[Hephephippo]

Around where I live, not much more than 30k can get you a small house!

Consumers don't expect to be taken advantage of by seller, but rather educated and informed with clear and open communication and policies.

This may be a cautionary tale for all who read at a later date. I'm sure OP and her FI would rather that not be true.

I look forward to the conclusion.

Fwiw, I overpaid for a pair of antique earrings, but I did so willingly because I fell absolutely in love with them at auction and simply couldn't bear the thought of someone offering more than my low start offer, so I paid full price for them. I did that willingly and likley overpaid by several hundred dollars. It was truly an emotional purchase..l saw my daughter wearing them on her wedding day. But what can I say? I knew what I was doing and I did it willingly. This is a much different situation and experience than what happened to OP's fi.

I agree and for certain things, I do not mind willingly paying over price. For luxury bags for example, if a bag is rare and the color combination is exactly what I have been wanting for a long time, I may jump to a personal seller even if it's way painfully above retail price. But that's because I don't know when I'll see the bag ever again brand new or used in a used market and from a known trusted personal shopper. Luckily it has not happened to me but my point is No one wants to feel like an idiot and treated like one and I would not wish that on others. No one wants to be taken advantage of, vulnerable or not.

 

[alamana]

You give a LOT of credit to the motivations of the seller, which truly are unknown.

The diamond district has a reputation of taking advantage of novice people, which is why we here at PS have recommended vendors there.

I didn't even touch on "the motivations of the seller" here and I certainly didn't give them any "credit." I have no doubt the diamond district had that reputation. So not sure what you are talking about. All I did is point out that the amount charged by the seller is comparable to that charged by an extremely popular mall jewelry store.

 

[Hephephippo]

HE, he bought his wedding band also? Is it a plain band or what?

Sorry I meant my wedding band. So much confusion since I'm a bit stressed by this and have an all day job interview tomorrow.. the timing blows. My wedding band matches the E-Ring and it's an eternity ring -- the kind with Lots of tiny diamonds around the whole outside of the ring. As to value, we won't know until appraisal time.

 

[HappyNewLife]

Defamation is hard to prove, would require the plantiff to prove loss of something such as business as a result and they would have to prove intent.

Yes, words on the internet never die, but someone expressing concern on one post on one website about their experience does not trigger anything for a defamation case. My opinion

Agreed. I've vented about a vendor here, so have many others. This is supposed to be a safe place to bring up concerns. The OP didn't even name names!

 

[whitewave]

I went to Kay.com and there is no way to compare (I found the website to be difficult). Their Best 2 carat princess is 19k with no specifications other than I color.... no dimensions or mm listed etc.

 

[lalala]

@Hephephippo just wondering if you went with the recommended appraiser posted on this thread (David Wolf)?

 

[Hephephippo]

@Hephephippo just wondering if you went with the recommended appraiser posted on this thread (David Wolf)?

Hi @lalala - we tried but could not get an appointment soon enough so SO is going to another one recommended by PS in the list here. We do however also have an appointment with David Wolf next week, in case we need that too (better safe than sorry)

 

[alamana]

Agreed. I've vented about a vendor here, so have many others. This is supposed to be a safe place to bring up concerns. The OP didn't even name names!

She was very clear in the original post that she intended to disclose the name of the store in the very near future. And she did a lot more than raise concerns--she accused the seller of deception when it seems pretty clear that that isn't true. One could make an argument, especially in a business like diamond dealing, that that is defamation. And that's a problem.

Yes, this should be a safe place to raise concerns. But a place to libel a business? No. It should not be that.

 

[lalala]

Hi @lalala - we tried but could not get an appointment soon enough so SO is going to another one recommended by PS in the list here. We do however also have an appointment with David Wolf next week, in case we need that too (better safe than sorry)

Great! Best of luck today. Can't wait to see what the appraiser has to say. Don't forget to make a list of questions (lots of good ones have been posted) and bring the GIA report!

 

[Hephephippo]

She was very clear in the original post that she intended to disclose the name of the store in the very near future. And she did a lot more than raise concerns--she accused the seller of deception when it seems pretty clear that that isn't true. One could make an argument, especially in a business like diamond dealing, that that is defamation. And that's a problem.

Yes, this should be a safe place to raise concerns. But a place to libel a business? No. It should not be that.

Except I have not named the business and you latch on my statement that I intend to do so. Yet I intend to do so depending on the outcome of my situation.

Further, if Yelp or Google reviews did not exist, then perhaps your point is right. I don't see any negative yelp reviews and Google reviews that have far worse statements made, be taken to court.

If this is defamation then all bad reviews in all forums will be the same. The business has far worse negative reviews than my experience and frankly I'm not the biggest fish they need to worry about.

 

[Hephephippo]

Great! Best of luck today. Can't wait to see what the appraiser has to say. Don't forget to make a list of questions (lots of good ones have been posted) and bring the GIA report!

Thank you could use the good energy today!

 

[alamana]

If this is defamation then all bad reviews in all forums will be the same. The business has far worse negative reviews than my experience and frankly I'm not the biggest fish they need to worry about.

Not all bad reviews are defamatory but I have neither the time nor inclination to explain it to you.

 

[Hephephippo]

Not all bad reviews are defamatory but I have neither the time nor inclination to explain it to you.

Great! Did not want it -- I know where to find it if I wanted to.

 

[SimoneDi]

@Hephephippo good luck with your interview and with clearing up your concerns regarding the ring and band(s) purchase! Please try to ignore some people's pessimism, apparently they have nothing better to do but project their negativity onto other people... For what is worth, the ring that your SO selected sounds lovely! I hope that there are no issues with the stone and the setting and that all of your concerns disappear. Seeing negative reviews about a business you have worked with will always raise red flags and no return policies always make me super anxious, but maybe there is nothing to worry about! Although, nowadays most jewels offer some return/exchange/upgrade policies, it is still possible to see stores that do no offer returns. No return policies, however, should always be disclosed. I would advice that your SO looks around the store better when he visits next because no return policies are usually printed and places around the checkout area. Keep us posted on the progress!

 

[Hephephippo]

Thank you, @SimoneDi and I do welcome the lesson learned for SO (I was honestly annoyed that he didn't think of that but I won't criticize - he was excited, nervous and was vulnerable). Besides, anyone could make this mistake.

Thanks for the vote of positivity - it's a good thing to spread that anywhere

 

[SimoneDi]

Thank you, @SimoneDi and I do welcome the lesson learned for SO (I was honestly annoyed that he didn't think of that but I won't criticize - he was excited, nervous and was vulnerable). Besides, anyone could make this mistake.

Thanks for the vote of positivity - it's a good thing to spread that anywhere

In my opinion, men are very vulnerable in the land of diamonds and jewelry - they are very likely to overpay and forget to ask about basic benefits such as return policies. See first how the appraisal goes and decide how you & your SO want to proceed further.

A side story - once my husband purchased an overprices pair of earrings for me. I appreciated his efforts, but returned the earrings the next day..sometimes, I wish that I kept them. I guess what I am trying to say is that even if the rings appraise for slightly less that purchased price, as long as you and your SO love the rings, maybe it is not the end of the word and you can enjoy them even if you can't/don't want to deal with an arduous return process. At the end of the day - your SO purchased them with love and excitement for your future together.

 

[nala]

Did you say that the other band purchased is for you and has diamonds all the way around? If that’s the case, it sounds like an eternity band and depending on the carat weight and quality, might explain the total amount that he spent. Here’s hoping!
I want to commend you on the patience and grace that you are showing on this thread! I certainly would have lost it a long time ago!

 

[HappyNewLife]

If the jeweler is cool with an exchange, I'd beg your BF to come along to pick out your ring. It's something you have to love for however many years - he can still surprise you with the proposal plans. Hang in there and let us know how it goes!

P.S. I don't think you needed to remove the GIA # or carat weight. It's not going to come up on the internet that you're the one that purchased it. If anything, google that GIA # to see if you can find it on ebay or other places where it may have sold back in 2011/2012

 

[Hephephippo]

In my opinion, men are very vulnerable in the land of diamonds and jewelry - they are very likely to overpay and forget to ask about basic benefits such as return policies. See first how the appraisal goes and decide how you & your SO want to proceed further.

A side story - once my husband purchased an overprices pair of earrings for me. I appreciated his efforts, but returned the earrings the next day..sometimes, I wish that I kept them. I guess what I am trying to say is that even if the rings appraise for slightly less that purchased price, as long as you and your SO love the rings, maybe it is not the end of the word and you can enjoy them even if you can't/don't want to deal with an arduous return process. At the end of the day - your SO purchased them with love and excitement for your future together.

Lovely story -- and a good perspective. I do like that my SO picked them out and if it great, then I can keep them and have them re-set in the future or change to a necklace, and get a new ring. I do like that he purchased it with love and excitement for our future -- something getting rarer these days.

 

[Hephephippo]

Did you say that the other band purchased is for you and has diamonds all the way around? If that’s the case, it sounds like an eternity band and depending on the carat weight and quality, might explain the total amount that he spent. Here’s hoping!
I want to commend you on the patience and grace that you are showing on this thread! I certainly would have lost it a long time ago!

Thank you @nala -- i always thought it best to communicate effectively and positively -- i mean that is what an open forum is about. I'm sad for those who are very negative but think they must be so unhappy with their lives... It's widely known in psychology that how you speak are more important than your message. So tone of negativity will also affect personal psychology and positive messaging translates to positive energy for the speaker. That said -- it does not cost a thing to speak gentle to yourself and to others, and it makes the world a much better place!

If the jeweler is cool with an exchange, I'd beg your BF to come along to pick out your ring. It's something you have to love for however many years - he can still surprise you with the proposal plans. Hang in there and let us know how it goes!

P.S. I don't think you needed to remove the GIA # or carat weight. It's not going to come up on the internet that you're the one that purchased it. If anything, google that GIA # to see if you can find it on ebay or other places where it may have sold back in 2011/2012

@HappyNewLife I will do exactly that!! I know SO won't mind I come after all this nightmare, and thank you for such a great idea! Will do that when I get home tonight to check!

 

[Hephephippo]

UPDATE:
My SO texted me after the appraisal, both with good news and bad news. My current info is limited because he said he will explain it to me tonight instead, and he is going straight to the merchant now.

The center diamond is “very good” according to the appraiser, with the girdle being very good but the deck is “low.” I don’t know what any of those mean. The accompanying diamonds on the band, as well as the wedding band, are all real diamonds too. The only concern that the appraiser raised is that the diamonds are severely overpriced for what they are worth (about 10k overpriced) and suggested SO return them though he said it may take time and difficulty to get a refund.

It’s not as bad as I thought it to be – will need to check myself for paranoia. SO is now at the store to return it, based on the report prepared by the appraiser and the return clause provided. Will share the full update as soon as I speak with SO tonight and i'm hoping the merchant will not be difficult.

 

[SimoneDi]

God luck to you and your SO @Hephephippo !! I would also say - send your SO some of the comparable stones that other PSers fund you yesterday. If they give him hard time, he can also pull the comps in front of them.

 

[Hephephippo]

God luck to you and your SO @Hephephippo !! I would also say - send your SO some of the comparable stones that other PSers fund you yesterday. If they give him hard time, he can also pull the comps in front of them.

Thank you, he has been at the merchant and I have not yet heard from him. Praying all goes well.

 

[SimoneDi]

Thank you, he has been at the merchant and I have not yet heard from him. Praying all goes well.

Dust for a successful refund!

 

[soxfan]

Fingers crossed!!!

 

[srke]

Hoping for the best.