Don''t Judge Me, Please!

[Ellen]

I''m not going to judge you, just point out, as ds did, there will always be something pretty out there.

Where will it end? Will it ever?

Just a thought.

 

[Ali]

Date: 2/4/2008 6:08:28 PM
Author: Gypsy

Date: 2/4/2008 5:52:26 PM
Author: MP
Concerning the price of the ring you''re trying to sell. Could you post some pictures up as well as some stats on it?

I''m sure there are parties on here that would be interested in it.

MP we aren''t allowed to self promote or use this website to further our own financial gain.

Gypsy is correct. This is a site for consumer education, not sales. If anyone has questions, please review the Forum Policies or contact us directly.

 

[erica k]

Date: 2/4/2008 6:24:55 PM
Author: TravelingGal

If you seek, you shall find, so the key is to stop ACTIVELY looking and trying on rings.

amen to that!

i'm not judging you, because i do the exact same thing! thankfully we've run out of money for jewelry-related projects (the husband wants to save up for a $5,000 drip-coffee machine

), so i can dream about upgrades to my heart's content without spending a penny. since the cartier ring isn't going anywhere, you should think about taking a break from PS and jewelry window-shopping for a few months, and then see how you feel. this also means not spending your time thinking about the ring. you're getting married soon, that's plenty to think about!

honestly, i adore your T&Co ring. i can see how it might not fetch as high of a price as the classic Tiffany setting, but i feel like you should be able to sell it for more than you were quoted for.

cartier is lovely, but like kcourselle mentioned, you might want to look into shops with generous upgrade policies.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 2/4/2008 5:21:08 PM
Author: Fly Girl
Please keep the Tiffany ring.

I like the suggestion to save up your $$$ and hunt for a bargain Cartier. You seem to have the gift, and I bet you could do it.

Ditto to this and what Tgal says. Your ring is one of my favorites!!!

 

[lumpkin]

The best advice you got was to stop looking. As someone who has changed, upgraded, downgraded and continued to lust after ever new rings, it really never does end unless you stop looking. There is always something gorgeous out there, and they become like Lays potatoe chips.

Why not funnel your energy into some bridal jewelry to go with your gown? Maybe some yummy diamond chandelier earrings? Or a diamond necklace (not a pendant, but an actual necklace) or a new bracelet?

You have a classic, classic ring. It''s absolutely stunning and truly, not eveyone gets to own a genuine Tiffany ring. I think you should hold off awhile.

 

[iheartscience]

No judgement from me! I would just say to slow down...the Cartier ring will always be there!

I tend to get hysterical about something, have to get it immediately, and then get over it in a few weeks or a few months if I''m lucky. I''ve done that with expensive handbags, shoes and jewelry, and although I don''t really regret the purchases, I wasn''t trading anything for them-just money!

But if you sold your e-ring for a ring you are lusting after and then you get over it, I think you''d be super depressed. So just slow down...you can think about it constantly and obsess about it all you want, but don''t do anything about it! Then, in 6 months or a year or whatever, if you''re still dying for it, do it.

The value you''ll be offered for your current e-ring isn''t likely to go down, and the price of the Cartier ring isn''t likely to go up that much in a year, so you''re not losing anything by waiting.

 

[fabcrab]

No judgement. I really think your current tiffany ring is quite lovely! I completely understand what you''re going through though. This should make sure that this isn''t just a "craving" that will eventually pass. Perhaps you should give it a month of thinking, without going to any Cartier stores anywhere. If you''re still obsessed then you may start competely thinking about it.

 

[Diamond*Dana]

I am not going to judge you, my pear has had so many different homes only to end up back in a plain YG solitaire as she was in originally...but I do love your ring. I think that I would just hold off for a bit.

 

[Beacon]

Torn between Cartier and Tiffany, yummy, that is excitement, that is drama - that is what I signed up here for!

First thing, let go of the "value" numbers. Your ring is not worth $7000, nor is it worth $27.2K. Those numbers represent the point of view of two very different players evaluating the stone with different goals in mind. So don't get sucked into those numbers and start feeling really good or really bad about your ring based on price.

Why exactly do you want the Cartier? This could be a metaphor for other things going on in your life. Maybe you are in the mood for change or drama or just want to shake things up? Maybe it's not really just about the ring?

Or have you made the choice that you want a round or that Cartier is the brand that does it for you most? Is the Cartier larger than what you have now? The setting is definitely lovely, but it is not totally off the wall unique, so is that what is pulling you?

My immediate advice would be: do nothing, check in a month or so and see how you feel. Leave the door open in your mind. Yes, you can have the Cartier if you want. Try not to turn it into an obsession (yes hard I know!). Give yourself permission to mull it over.

I like the consignment idea if you do sell your ring, that might get you the best price. But seriously I would just wait it out for a while. You have a nice ring in hand and you don't want to rush.

 

[diamondfan]

Just to let you know that prices are going up at retailers that are European. The dollar versus the Euro is not helping. Try to see what it is you love about it and see, if you cannot talk yourself out of it, if there is a similar setting elsewhere. Selling your stone is NOT going to get you a premium price, and you will be paying one for the ring at Cartier. Most of these vendors have just had or will be having increases soon.

 

[Cathers]

Date: 2/4/2008 4:54:05 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006
I know the feeling very well, that there is always something around the corner just a little more beautiful. It is hard for some of us to choose settings, because it is hard to narrow it down to one.

My caution to you is that unless you stop looking at rings on the internet and in jewelry stores, you are always going to find another one that you love and wish you had.

If I were you, I''d keep the Tiffany ring especially since it was a good deal, and hope to eventually find the Cartier ring second hand. Then you can wear the Tiffany ring on your right hand, since 3 stone rings make great right hand rings. Or even if you can''t find it second hand, perhaps your husband can get you the Cartier ring if you still really love it for your 5th or 10th anniversary. You can start your ''dream ring'' savings account now! And then if in 5-10 years you like something else even better, you can go for that instead!

diamondseeker, after reading your response, I felt compelled to post. You, indirectly gave me the kick in the arse wake up call I needed, because, even tho I LOVE my e-ring, I find myself constantly looking at, mooning over and wondering ''what if?'' and saying ''will my diamond fit in that setting?'' Your reply was honest and straightforward and what I needed to hear. It''s like at Christmas, I contract the ''one-more itis'' disease for my children: they just need one more thing, one more thing, when, in fact, they really don''t

 

[Sundial]

No one on pricescope should be judging anybody else for lusting after another ring! We all understand, but I have to say Belle that your Tiffany emerald cut three stone ring is one of the most beautiful that I have seen on this forum. Please give this some time before making a change to make sure that this is what you really really want. As others have stated when you start looking you will find!!!

 

[isis~goddess]

well how much did you pay for it? list it on ebay for close to what you payed, or what you are willing to lose. i will say this, if you''re going to sell it on ebay, do it now, for whatever reason, i notice people don''t buy diamonds during the summer months like they do in other seasons. also, when you think about it, the biggest month for weddings is june, whats the average length of engagement? 6 months? i heard that it was, but i could be wrong. maybe i jsut think that because i was engaged for 6 months? anyway, if that''s the case, list it now. list it twice, if it does not sell, then the diamond gods are telling you to keep it and QUIT LOOKING! lol

 

[Madam Bijoux]

When you want to trade a ring in to a store that did not make the ring, I think you have to hold onto it for at least 10 years to get a trade-in value that is somewhat close to the price you paid. But you might never get the full price you paid when you trade it in. What about waiting a year and getting the Cartier ring as a first anniversary gift

?

 

[Miscka]

I think you have gotten some good advice. With your wedding and all going on, maybe wait and see if you are still thinking of it after all that commotion. Your current ring is gorgeous, btw!

 

[MP]

My bad guys and gals. I wasn''t aware of the rules of selling items on the site by an individual party.

As far as your dillema UCLA all I can say is if you have the means to do what you like jewelry wise than why not go for it. You only live once.

Anyone have a picture of a Cartier 1895 ring?

 

[wen104]

Ow don''t sell that beautiful ring wait until the 10th anniversary and get the other one you want also

. That way you can change it up when you want. As a diamond lover myself and finding myself obsessed with what I cannot have, I have come to the conclusion that all good things will come in due time. So I wait and maybe wait for a long time because 3 kids come first but that being said we always need soemthing to look forward to in our future. Keeps us fresh. I have an amazing .70 ideal H&A which is much bigger then any of my friends or family but I would love to have a 1.5. Stay out of those stores cause that is what causes this problem, us diamond lovers are crazy! Ow and no judgement here, I actually fully understand your dilemma! Good luck and let us know what you decide!

 

[decodelighted]

I really wonder if its the FEELING you're chasing ... and the high that comes from being first engaged and having the new sparkly etc. Six months out from a wedding is a SUPER STRESSFUL time for a lot of folks. You could be nostalgic for the beginning again -- when its all so new & stress free.

As far as the "if you love it, go for it" folks go -- IMHO, Belle has been "going for it" -- over and over again. Four, five times since she's been engaged? Its not working. Scratching the itch doesn't ever "solve" the problem. Even *recently* when she's been very vocal about how cured she was now that she found "the one"?? True love/lust crept its way back in.

But even a landslide of "STOP!!!!" might not have any effect. Last time people said the same thing ... "stop looking" and sure enough the Tiffany ring showed up. Fact is: you keep ACTING on your impulses, lusts. If you ever stopped ACTING on them you'd probably see that they'd PASS. And that you wouldn't be fixated on "the one that got away". You'd find a whole new thing to fixate on.

And then pass that up as well.

 

[UCLABelle]

I think Deco is right (and others) to a degree that it is best to stop looking. I will probably save and get a similar ring, or a small Cartier one for a 1st or 5yr.

But I disagree that it has something to do with the idea that I am missing the "thrill" of getting a new ring, or that I am stressed about getting married....

Can't it just be that I honestly just love ALL THE DARN RINGS!!!!!! SO MANY OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!

They are all so different, and I think that it would be nice to have them all....


I do feel though that I must bid goodbye to PS. It is simply fueling the fire...

and I simply cannot see all these awesome rings all the time and wait for the "desire" for them to pass....so I probably just have to cut it off (I guess this means I will not be visiting the new HW in summer 2008 when it opens in Costa Mesa!!!!!).

Deco-In my slight defense, my actual e-ring that I had consisted on numerous setting changes...probably done to attempt to counteract my dislike of an "I" colored "Square Emerald Cut"...not that it sounds any better

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/5/2008 11:28:16 AM
Author: UCLABelle

Can''t it just be that I honestly just love ALL THE DARN RINGS!!!!!! SO MANY OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!

They are all so different, and I think that it would be nice to have them all....

I suppose it could, except, I see rings on here weekly that I love, think are beautiful, stunning, etc. But I don''t think, "I have to have that"! And I''m actually not going to be with my current setting forever, it''s temporary. So I could be "looking". But I love my setting, and I''m going to get my money''s worth out of it, and someday, for a big bday or anni, I''ll get my forever setting.

So, while it "could" be that, I wonder.... I really hate to see you leave though. I wish you could just figure out what''s truly causing this, if there IS a real reason. And I wish I could be more help.

 

[lumpkin]

I wish you didn''t feel like you have to leave PS to stop looking at the possibility of trading your ering. I know how you feel, though, because I don''t come as often as I used to and I don''t spend a lot of time looking at the SMTR forum thread that has all the erings in one place. I used to look at some for "inspiration" for future rings and I finally decided that by doing that I was making myself unhappy with what I have, when what I have is a heck of a lot nicer than what most of the people I know have. There''s always that push for the next level and it can be consuming. After some time I can look with some detachment and know that what I already have suits me very well. Yes, there are other things that would suit me well, too, but I already HAVE this one and I get to look at it all the time. Hopefully you will get to that place and can come and visit without that feeling of unrequited lust after other styles, shapes, sizes and settings. Someone else is lusting after YOUR ring, too.

 

[lumpkin]

Date: 2/5/2008 11:46:56 AM
Author: Ellen

Date: 2/5/2008 11:28:16 AM
Author: UCLABelle

Can''t it just be that I honestly just love ALL THE DARN RINGS!!!!!! SO MANY OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!

They are all so different, and I think that it would be nice to have them all....

I suppose it could, except, I see rings on here weekly that I love, think are beautiful, stunning, etc. But I don''t think, ''I have to have that''! And I''m actually not going to be with my current setting forever, it''s temporary. So I could be ''looking''. But I love my setting, and I''m going to get my money''s worth out of it, and someday, for a big bday or anni, I''ll get my forever setting.

So, while it ''could'' be that, I wonder.... I really hate to see you leave though. I wish you could just figure out what''s truly causing this, if there IS a real reason. And I wish I could be more help.

Wha???? Say it ain''t so!!! Ellen, I love your setting! The ring is perfect on you and so elegant. If ever there was a jewelry match made in heaven it was your diamond and your setting.

 

[UCLABelle]

Ellen & Lumpkin- I know, I wish I could, I am just not as strong as all of you gals (and guys

).....

Plus, it is probably time to jump to a new forum such as "How to Save Money!" or something like that

 

[TravelingGal]

I do agree that "new" is what keeps a lot of people going in life (whether it be experiences, material possessions, etc). Your need for new seems to be fixated on your ring...is there anything else you can transfer that attention to?

And c''mon...there have to be ways to still lurk around PS but not covet every gorgeous ring that pops up. Perhaps opening up a window with your bank account side by side with PS. Or visiting Zales on a regular basis. Didn''t you also recently buy a new condo? Tape your mortgage stubs onto your computer....

 

[Ellen]

Date: 2/5/2008 11:50:59 AM
Author: lumpkin


Wha???? Say it ain''t so!!! Ellen, I love your setting! The ring is perfect on you and so elegant. If ever there was a jewelry match made in heaven it was your diamond and your setting.

Oh, lol, thank you mam! I DO love it (and yours), but honestly, it was picked partially because I put the majority of the budget into the stone. But don''t worry, it''s going to be around for quite awhile.

And who knows, maybe I will get too attached to change it.

LOL@Tgal!!

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 2/5/2008 11:28:16 AM
Author: UCLABelle
I disagree that it has something to do with the idea that I am missing the 'thrill' of getting a new ring, or that I am stressed about getting married....

Well you would know best! It was just a wild guess on my part ... because of the timing etc.

Deco-In my slight defense, my actual e-ring that I had consisted on numerous setting changes...probably done to attempt to counteract my dislike of an 'I' colored 'Square Emerald Cut'...not that it sounds any better

Aw ... you don't need a defense. Color-sensitivity ... its a real problem for some folks. And its understandable that you (or anyone else) might not "know" until they "know" ... yanno? Obvs the sq. emerald wasn't for you. But this Tiffany had you OVER THE MOON! I worry you might really miss it when the gloss is off whatever else you love/lust next. And just that it doesn't seem practical $$-wise to contemplate a switch. Whether you can afford to or not ... it seems you'd take a bath on the Tiffany and pay so much markup for the Cartier (double pain!). With a track record of wanting something different in another year or so ... Skip the Cartier. See if it passes. If you want it 2 yrs, 5 yrs, 10 years from now ... get it! No one says you only get one ring & you have to trade in every time.

Delaying gratification is really a rite of passage. Totally not fun ... but everyone goes through it. I'm sure you're stronger than you think -- but exercising those "no" muscles will make you stronger. And give you more confidence that you can do it ... and more history like: "wow ... I'm glad I DIDN'T make that purchase/switch/etc" to inform your future decisions.

Wanting is human nature. A few years back I had to take a break from magazines because they were stirring up too much "want". I read some now but I feel stronger about things. Am sharing this not to be all preachy but to *relate* ... hopefully *help*.

ETA: I should mention that I didn't come up with the "take a break from mags" idea on my OWN. A well-meaning friend, sick to death of hearing me obsess over the latest, greatest, trendiest whatEVER called me on my consumption. Told me of her own struggles & how she put a stop to it. It was a needed wake-up call in my case and I'm SO glad she gave me a tangible way to see that it NEVER ENDS. Mags keep coming, celebs keep wearing stuff, new gorgeous jewelry keeps being designed. To get control I had to TAKE control. There are other parts of PS yanno?

 

[kellyfish]

I can totally relate. If I could afford it, I''d have about 5 e-rings & seeing all of this beautiful jewelry certainly fuels that urge. This situation reminds me of what someone told me when I was shopping for wedding dresses, "When you pick out your dress, do not look at any more. You WILL see one you like better eventually!!" I think the same holds true in this case....

 

[vespergirl]

Hi UCLA,

First of all, let me just say that I think that your ring is absolutely gorgeous and stunning, and I would give a toe to get something that nice from Tiffany''s

But, I know how you feel - but I think that what you may have is "I''m tired of step-cut-itis". I also had that problem with my asscher - as much as I loved them under "jewlery store lights," they never performed like I wanted them to in the real world. When I took a girlfriend with me to look at other shapes and stones when I was thinking of trading my asscher, I fell in love with a 3-stone emerald cut, just like zhuzhu''s new ring. But she reminded me that I fell like the step cuts always look smudgy and flat in most lighting if I wasn''t constantly cleaning it, so won''t I stop liking an emerald cut once I get it out of the store?

Of course, she was right, so I went for a round brilliant, and absolutely love it. I never thought that I was a "round" girl, but now I know why they''re as popular as they are. I still love asschers & emerald cuts, but I am going to save that 3-stone emerald cut for our 10th anniversary, and maybe I''ll treat myself to a ritani endless love asscher halo RHR when I go back to work (I''m staying home with my son now)

Still, I don''t mean for this post to encourage you to switch out your ring. It was easy for me to do financially because my jeweler has a 100% lifetime trade-in policy. But, I have to say, with the first asscher trade-up, my husband totally understood why I wanted to trade up once people were asking if my stone was much smaller than it was (he was into getting me a big stone, and it annoyed him that people thought it was half the size that it was) but it was still kind of sad for both of us to see the diamond that we had picked out together go back to the jeweler.

But, I had also waited until AFTER the wedding to say anything about a trade-up. I didn''t want to bring it up right away not knowing what his reaction would be.

So, I think that you should wait until after the wedding, and then still see if you are interested in the Cartier. I know that I come on here every day & see something else that I like. My new obsession is Leon''s work, and in a few years, I would love to have a custom micropave setting made for my new stone, but it''s fine where it is right now, and since I''m not even really decided on what I would want, I''m not even going to start planning that sort of thing unless it''s for a big occassion, like an anniversary, or a push present for our next child. I think that we have only so many "jewelry credits" with our husbands, and mine jokes with me that I''ve sued all of mine up until 2009

I think that you guys should just make it to the wedding - maybe pick a plain 2 mm platinum wedding band, so that if you do decide to change or upgrade your ring later, it will go with whatever you choose. Or you can get a tiny version of the cartier for yourself as a "career" gift later, like if you get a promotion or raise or something. Or, maybe your husband will get you that cartier as a push present if yu guys are planning on kids, or as a nice anniversary gift.

Just stick with what you have now, because it''s a gorgeous ring!

 

[vespergirl]

Hi UCLA, just one more thing - I just checked out the Carter on Signed Pieces that you were talking about, and while I think it''s nice, I think that your ring is MUCH PRETTIER!

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 2/5/2008 12:50:19 PM
Author: vespergirl
Hi UCLA, just one more thing - I just checked out the Carter on Signed Pieces that you were talking about, and while I think it's nice, I think that your ring is MUCH PRETTIER!

I agree!

And seeing that pix reminded me ... didn't Ebree have a VERY similar ring made that she ended up re-setting because NO WEDDING BANDS flattered that setting? Belle, read up on Ebree's story -- it might squash the want ASAP!

Here is her story.