Starting over?

[E B]

Why hello, RT!

Recently, I posted about my wedding band dilemma. Basically, my fingers are quite short and I, so excited about having an engagement ring made, didn't think about what I was going to do about a wedding band. The engagement ring was made at almost 3mm (just measured), and now, on a quest for a wedding band, I'm not finding anything I like.

Since that thread, I've been to 3 or 4 places and haven't found anything. I've tried on every type of band that exists, it seems like. Paired with my current setting, every wedding band I've tried has either a) overwhelmed my finger or b) clashed with my engagement ring (whether it was too much sparkle or the wrong style).

Here are my choices, and I'd love some feedback.

1) Sell the entire ring. Since the setting was made for the diamond, selling the setting alone isn't going to work. I already have someone interested. Buy new diamond, have set in plain solitaire until I can make my mind up. Already found a great looking diamond.

2) Keep the ring, and wear it on my right finger (this idea isn't my favorite, but I might consider it).

3) Re-set the diamond, losing the entire cost of the setting.

4) Suck it up, buy a wedding ring I like and deal with it.

This whole situation has me feeling pretty awful. I was hasty, and I wasn't thinking about the wedding band when we created the engagement ring. FH wants me to do whatever I'd like.

What would you do? I guess I just have too many options, and I need some advice.

 

[AmberWaves]

Ebree, I''m sorry you''re having such a hard time!! Wow, thinking of selling the whole package? Wow, that''s brave!

But, if you already have a buyer and your eye on something else, it sounds like you really want this option. If you want this, don''t settle for a band that''s "okay" or an ering you no longer love. It may not be the easiest or most efficient way to do it, but number one sounds like your ideal choice.

 

[Kaleigh]

EBree, can you post a pic of your ering for us??

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 5:59:36 PM
Author: AmberWaves
Ebree, I'm sorry you're having such a hard time!! Wow, thinking of selling the whole package? Wow, that's brave!

But, if you already have a buyer and your eye on something else, it sounds like you really want this option. If you want this, don't settle for a band that's 'okay' or an ering you no longer love. It may not be the easiest or most efficient way to do it, but number one sounds like your ideal choice.

I wish it was my ideal choice! My ideal choice would be to go back in time and remind my *giggly*, soon-to-be-engaged self to take into account what a wedding band would look like with my design!

I just feel awful because it's a fabulously gorgeous setting (and diamond!) but the fact of the matter is, it's just too thick for my short baby fingers. Besides, to be completely honest, finding a beautiful, meaningful wedding band means too much to me. I don't want to settle for one just so it "goes with my e-ring", ya know?

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I think the logical thing is to have a wedding band made to match the e-ring, unless you have just changed your mind about the e-ring altogether.

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 6:06:50 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006
I think the logical thing is to have a wedding band made to match the e-ring, unless you have just changed your mind about the e-ring altogether.

Diamondseeker,

I''ve considered this, but to have a wedding band made to match the e-ring would be too much width on my finger. I tried on a 2.5mm wedding band the other day, and with my e-ring, it was still too much! 4mm on my finger is just about right, and I''d be 2mm over with a matching band.

 

[belle]

if you already have a buyer and are comfortable with making the sale, i would do it. i know what it''s like when you have a lack of ''real estate'' on the finger. 3mm+xxmm adds up quickly. if hand to knuckle coverage is not the look you''re going for, you won''t be happy.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Tacori E-ring has a really wide e-ring, and she had a thinner (@2mm) custom diamond band made to match. She has little hands, too. It looks terrific!

 

[mrssalvo]

If I remember correctly you didn't like the idea of having a matching wedding band made right? I agree with Amber that it sounds like you're ready to move on from you current e-ring since you already have an interested buyer and your eye on a new diamond. I wish there was a way to post it somewhere to remind gals to think about the wedding band while searching for a setting. You're not the only one to have done it and I know how hard it is to want to have a wedding band that works. I think Dani is going through the same thing. anyway, if you got a buyer willing to give you a fair price, I'd probably take them up on it and get a setting and wedding band you can love forever. Assuming your fiance is ok with that

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 6:14:57 PM
Author: mrssalvo
If I remember correctly you didn''t like the idea of having a matching wedding band made right? I agree with Amber that it sounds like you''re ready to move on from you current e-ring since you already have an interested buyer and your eye on a new diamond. I wish there was a way to post it somewhere to remind gals to think about the wedding band while searching for a setting. You''re not the only one to have done it and I know how hard it is to want to have a wedding band that works. I think Dani is going through the same thing. anyway, if you got a buyer willing to give you a fair price, I''d probably take them up on it and get a setting and wedding band you can love forever. Assuming your fiance is ok with that

mrssalvo and belle (and Amber!),

Choice #1 does look the best right now. The buyer is offering enough to buy a new stone and a solitaire setting, even though we''re taking a bit of a hit. But, I can''t help but feeling a bit...superstitious? Silly, I know.

 

[AmberWaves]

Ebree, I know what you mean about superstitious! I would, too. But I''ve never been of the thought that this is my "Forever" ering. I WILL upgrade someday, and who knows what setting I''ll get? But the wedding band, now that IS forever, and it means more to ME. If you''re thinking the same way, follow your gut, girl.

So your e-ring was designed for you and GORGEOUS. It''ll look almost as good on someone else (no offense, I swear). And your next one will be the one that you love, maybe forever?

 

[decodelighted]

Okay ... we *really* need the pix to discuss this ... so I hope this worked!

I think I mentioned it before ... but we both have a "meaty" finger situation. Yours is about four-five sizes smaller than MINE

... but, slightly meaty where the meat meets the bling ... if ya follow!

Go EASY on yourself, girl! The ring itself isn''t some crazy monster you created blindly ... it''s a pretty simple design, gorgeously executed. Which makes me think ... have you seen a 2mm+2mm set that you DO like the looks of on your hand? Sometimes super thin things can emphasize "meat" in a way wider bands don''t ... I just don''t want you to end up with something that doesn''t "work" for a totally other reason!

For my w-band, I went with something thinner than my e-ring & not matchy ... the "link band" from EDJ. That helped visually for me ... to still make my ering "pop". I wonder if you tried something like that ... or the marquise, round alternating band ... or something with color ... all in the 1.7 - 2mm range ... if that might "do the trick".

If you *really* prefer plan a though... then by all means go for it ...

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I don''t think you need to feel superstitious...plenty of us on here have upgraded at some point! Did you find a stone you like as well or better?

 

[decodelighted]

Here''s a never before seen (and you''ll know why -- hello, blurry!) pix of my ering & new w-band together. Hope this illustrates the non-matchy combo on "meaty" fingers! But, again, this might be EXACTLY the look you''re hoping to AVOID!

 

[february2003bride]

Ebree-

Can Whiteflash or Quest not make a 1.5-2.0mm wedding band to match?

 

[E B]

*Double Post*

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 6:50:16 PM
Author: decodelighted
Okay ... we *really* need the pix to discuss this ... so I hope this worked!

I think I mentioned it before ... but we both have a 'meaty' finger situation. Yours is about four-five sizes smaller than MINE

... but, slightly meaty where the meat meets the bling ... if ya follow!


Go EASY on yourself, girl! The ring itself isn't some crazy monster you created blindly ... it's a pretty simple design, gorgeously executed. Which makes me think ... have you seen a 2mm+2mm set that you DO like the looks of on your hand? Sometimes super thin things can emphasize 'meat' in a way wider bands don't ... I just don't want you to end up with something that doesn't 'work' for a totally other reason!


For my w-band, I went with something thinner than my e-ring & not matchy ... the 'link band' from EDJ. That helped visually for me ... to still make my ering 'pop'. I wonder if you tried something like that ... or the marquise, round alternating band ... or something with color ... all in the 1.7 - 2mm range ... if that might 'do the trick'.


If you *really* prefer plan a though... then by all means go for it ...

LOL, Deco, that pic makes me *cringe* everytime I see it. For some reason, my fingers look like they're bratwursts in pics. In real life, my hands (and fingers) look like a child's. Very small. Dough-y. My fiance can bend his fingers to the second knuckles over mine.

Regarding the size, I love it on my finger alone. 4mm is good too...I've tried two very thin settings together and they looked great. Any more than that is just too much. If I had longer fingers, it'd look great with any band. Alas, I don't (do they make a machine that stretches fingers?

). While at Robbins Bros., just for fun, I tried on one of those beautiful, 6mm Simon G rings. It literally ate up the entire bottom part of my finger.

I tried on some diamond bands (from a 1.7mm Ritani to a 2.5mm Scott Kay, I believe), and with my e-ring, it was bling city. Beautiful on other PSers (especially yours- I love the way they compliment but don't match exactly), but too much for me. I'm a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal, and I just felt like it was too much.

I'm actually leaning toward an engraved wedding band, similar to the one my mom wears. I've always loved it.

p.s. Amber- that's the way I feel too. That's why I want a beautiful wedding band that I'll love with or independent of the engagement ring. I want to keep it for always.

 

[february2003bride]

Date: 10/16/2006 7:09:06 PM
Author: EBree

Date: 10/16/2006 6:50:16 PM
Author: decodelighted
Okay ... we *really* need the pix to discuss this ... so I hope this worked!

I think I mentioned it before ... but we both have a ''meaty'' finger situation. Yours is about four-five sizes smaller than MINE

... but, slightly meaty where the meat meets the bling ... if ya follow!


Go EASY on yourself, girl! The ring itself isn''t some crazy monster you created blindly ... it''s a pretty simple design, gorgeously executed. Which makes me think ... have you seen a 2mm+2mm set that you DO like the looks of on your hand? Sometimes super thin things can emphasize ''meat'' in a way wider bands don''t ... I just don''t want you to end up with something that doesn''t ''work'' for a totally other reason!


For my w-band, I went with something thinner than my e-ring & not matchy ... the ''link band'' from EDJ. That helped visually for me ... to still make my ering ''pop''. I wonder if you tried something like that ... or the marquise, round alternating band ... or something with color ... all in the 1.7 - 2mm range ... if that might ''do the trick''.


If you *really* prefer plan a though... then by all means go for it ...

LOL, Deco, that pic makes me *cringe* everytime I see it. For some reason, my fingers look like they''re bratwursts in pics. In real life, my hands (and fingers) look like a child''s. Very small. Dough-y. My fiance can bend his fingers to the second knuckles over mine.

Regarding the size, I love it on my finger alone. 4mm is good too...I''ve tried two very thin settings together and they looked great. Any more than that is just too much. If I had longer fingers, it''d look great with any band. Alas, I don''t (do they make a machine that stretches fingers?

). While at Robbins Bros., just for fun, I tried on one of those beautiful, 6mm Simon G rings. It literally ate up the entire bottom part of my finger.

I tried on some diamond bands (from a 1.7mm Ritani to a 2.5mm Scott Kay, I believe), and with my e-ring, it was bling city. Beautiful on other PSers (especially yours- I love the way they compliment but don''t match exactly), but too much for me. I''m a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal, and I just felt like it was too much.

I''m actually leaning toward an engraved wedding band, similar to the one my mom wears. I''ve always loved it.

p.s. Amber- that''s the way I feel too. That''s why I want a beautiful wedding band that I''ll love with or independent of the engagement ring. I want to keep it for always.

EBree-

I totally understand the jaens and t-shirt style. I bet a 1.5-2.0mm matching band would be gorgeous! Just a little sparkly, not too blingy but it would go with your set and not be so wide.

 

[february2003bride]

Ebree-

Have you seen this band? It''s from Blue Nile and is 2.5mm with milgrain. I bet someone could do a 2.0 with milgrain!
http://www.bluenile.com/product_details.asp?oid=6287&catid=126&filter_id=0&nav1=band_channel.asp&page=1&col=2&row=6&pos=17&set_shape=

 

[E B]

Feb,

I tried on a band like that just yesterday! I was so hopeful, but it just didn''t work. Still too much finger coverage.

 

[february2003bride]

That''s too bad

You have such a gorgeous engagement ring! My e0ring setting was damaged and couldn''t be repaired so when I picked out my new one, I was working backwards; the e-ring had to fit the wedding band. Why don''t you find THE wedding band, whether it matches your e-ring or not, and then go from there. If it works with your e-ring, great. If not, then you know you have options!

 

[decodelighted]

Have you seen this one? #1 ... the 2mm engraved platinum one?

Or this one? Also 2mm, engraved, from Solomon Bros??



ETA-- check these out .. at least for fun!

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 7:28:33 PM
Author: february2003bride
Why don''t you find THE wedding band, whether it matches your e-ring or not, and then go from there. If it works with your e-ring, great. If not, then you know you have options!

That''s a great idea. I have a couple of great options already, but I''m not rushing into anything (as I did before). I should get a photo of the new diamond I''m thinking about tomorrow, so we''ll see if I flip for it or not.

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 7:36:54 PM
Author: decodelighted
Have you seen this one? #1 ... the 2mm engraved platinum one?


Or this one? Also 2mm, engraved, from Solomon Bros??

They''re both gorgeous (!) but unfortunately, both out of budget. I like the 3-sided engraving, but I was under the impression that the sides wear down if they rub against another platinum ring.

 

[Diamond*Dana]

Your engagement ring is beautiful...it would be a shame to have to start over. My eternity band would match it perfectly!

 

[kcoursolle]

I hope this doesn''t come off the wrong way, I don''t mean it in a bad way. Ebree, not thinking about wedding bands at all...Are you even happy with your engagement ring??

For some reason, it seems to me that you might be having trouble picking a band because you may not like your current engagement ring or the setting. If this is the case, I would focus on getting the band you want for your furture engagement ring. You can buy the wedding ring you want, and for now deal with not loving the two together until you upgrade your current engagement ring.

Please forgive me if I am not assessing the situation well, but it''s just a feeling I''m getting from your posts.

 

[jcrow]

sorry if you already answered, but-- do you know the person who is interested in your ring? as in, would you see it regularly? and if so, how does that make you feel? i know **i** wouldn''t be comfortable with that. **i''d** be second-guessing myself- at least i think i would. ha!

also, i really wouldn''t suggest getting a regular setting in the meantime if you do sell your current ring. if i were to sell the ring - and i was you - i''d start from scratch with BOTH rings. i would make sure the two were thin enough and sat flush together as a set, from the start. it''s much harder starting with an e-ring and then finding a w-ring to match later on - remember, that''s how you ended up in this place to begin with.

 

[E B]

Date: 10/16/2006 8:45:40 PM
Author: kcoursolle
I hope this doesn't come off the wrong way, I don't mean it in a bad way. Ebree, not thinking about wedding bands at all...Are you even happy with your engagement ring??

For some reason, it seems to me that you might be having trouble picking a band because you may not like your current engagement ring or the setting. If this is the case, I would focus on getting the band you want for your furture engagement ring. You can buy the wedding ring you want, and for now deal with not loving the two together until you upgrade your current engagement ring.

Please forgive me if I am not assessing the situation well, but it's just a feeling I'm getting from your posts.

I know this is how I must sound, but I truly do love my engagement ring. The only thing I don't like about it, actually, is it's width on my finger. On a longer finger, it'd be fabulous! It is a fabulous setting...so incredibly sparkly and well made.

DiamondDana- Thanks! It would be a perfect match. If I had longer fingers (and didn't mind a ton of bling), it'd be a match made in heaven!

JCrow- If I go with a completely new ring, I'll be getting a temp setting for now. The cheapest one they have. I can't risk spending $$$ for a setting I don't love, so I'm going to really think this next setting through, for months. I'm going to keep looking for a wedding band I *adore*, and I'll make sure, when I finally find the perfect setting, that it sits flush with my wedding band. Right now, the perfect wedding band is what I'm focused on most.

 

[AmberWaves]

Ebree, I totally know where you''re coming from. I want a 2mm at the MOST WB, even though my ering is 2mm at the most as well. For so long (ha- the 7 months we''ve been engaged!

) I thought I totally wanted a prong-set WB, but then I thought that I really just want a 2mm plain band that we can engrave with something meaningful. Why did I change my mind? Well, (this is purely my opinion), having a plain band is so classic, and something that will ALWAYS go- jeans, Paul''s XXL sweatshirt and nikes, or a little black dress, no matter, it fits. It''s less hassle, and I know I''ll get my diamond studded band at some point, but when I do, I want the best quality and right now, we need a new bed. I''d rather spend our money on something we both can enjoy and also have this classic band that I can give to my granddaughter, like I have MY g-mas. I wish you luck, I KNOW how much you love your ering, but it''s something that while very special in it''s own right, doesn''t symbolize an eternal love like a wedding ring does to me. I think you feel kinda the same way, right? If you ever need to go searching around, I''d love to come, I need to find my band (and drool over ones we can''t afford yet!

)

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I have smaller hands/shorter fingers as well but I can comfortably wear more width than you can (like DS2006 mentioned). I think I can go up to 9-10 mm. Right not I am around 8 mm. Have you ever thought (sorry if you or someone already mentioned this) wearing your e-ring and WB on seperate fingers/hands? That way you could keep the e-ring you love and get the WB you would love. Also I know some designers make 1.5-1.7 mm. Would that work? When and if I ever upgrade I will still keep my e-ring. Maybe I am just more sentimental but this is the ring he proposed with and to me that means a lot.