Do you find the acronym MILF offensive?

[Matata]

"Find me a majority of women who ..."

Oh okay, so only "majorities" matter. Got it.

Nice baiting technique.

 

[sonnyjane]

You wouldn't post a racist slur like "n*gger" and excuse it by saying that you expect to be able to discuss anything here. In my opinion, MILF is a slur like "n*gger" or "c*nt". I apologize if you didn't realize that it is, but it is.

Woahhhh not even remotely in the same category. “I apologize if you didn’t realize that.”

 

[chrono]

Not related to this topic and maybe I should start a separate thread but I noticed that the F word is used more and more frequently at the office place (even during meetings) without anyone batting an eyelash. It isn't said in anger but used as a adjective.

 

[House Cat]

You wouldn't post a racist slur like "n*gger" and excuse it by saying that you expect to be able to discuss anything here. In my opinion, MILF is a slur like "n*gger" or "c*nt". I apologize if you didn't realize that it is, but it is.

MILF is in no way the same as the n-word, period.

 

[arkieb1]

MILF is in no way the same as the n-word, period.

I honestly think it depends who says it and how it's being said, if a guy you don't know says MILF in a really aggressive tone to a female of any age, then it's not meant in a good way but, if a black guy I know says to another black guy I know "hey **edited, inappropriate to ever use that word please** how are you going" then it's meant to be a funny witty term of endearment... These are real situations I've been a part of.

 

[House Cat]

I honestly think it depends who says it and how it's being said, if a guy you don't know says MILF in a really aggressive tone to a female of any age, then it's not meant in a good way but, if a black guy I know says to another black guy I know "hey **edited, inappropriate to ever use that word please** how are you going" then it's meant to be a funny witty term of endearment... These are real situations I've been a part of.

So you think that the tone of a person’s voice can change the meaning of MILF to the point to where it compares to 400 years of slavery? Nope!

This is a term that was invented for the teen movie American Pie. It doesn’t imply murder, rape, enslavement, etc.

 

[arkieb1]

So you think that the tone of a person’s voice can change the meaning of MILF to the point to where it compares to 400 years of slavery? Nope!

This is a term that was invented in the teen movie American Pie. It doesn’t imply murder, rape, enslavement, etc.

No, I totally agree with what you are saying, but on the flip side of that young people that I've observed specifically young men frequently don't even think about 400 years of slavery and call each other that, and on the flip side these days MILF isn't always used in a nice way, it's used by young men to objectify and demean women.

So I've seen the word **edited, inappropriate to ever use that word please** used as a joking endearing term and I've seen the acronym MILF which was probably originally used as a joking and funny term used in a highly aggressive patronising way.

Lets agree both terms suck because to be honest I hate both.....

 

[nala]

No, I totally agree with what you are saying, but on the flip side of that young people that I've observed specifically young men frequently don't even think about 400 years of slavery and call each other that, and on the flip side these days MILF isn't always used in a nice way, it's used by young men to objectify and demean women.

So I've seen the word **edited, inappropriate to ever use that word please** used as a joking endearing term and I've seen the acronym MILF which was probably originally used as a joking and funny term used in a highly aggressive patronising way.

Lets agree both terms suck because to be honest I hate both.....

Can you please stop writing the N word...

 

[LLJsmom]

To respond to the original question, it is an offensive term. However In order to use it, a person must be thinking about it. If a person is thinking about it, I would rather they say it out loud. It reveals their true thoughts and I could avoid that person going forward.

 

[Ella]

Folks, PLEASE stop quoting posts with offensive language in them. It makes our job so much harder.

NO ONE should EVER be using the n word on this forum. Period.

 

[1ofakind]

To respond to the original question, it is an offensive term. However In order to use it, a person must be thinking about it. If a person is thinking about it, I would rather they say it out loud. It reveals their true thoughts and I could avoid that person going forward.

This....I am not generally in favor of editing words or thoughts for the sake of appealing to those who may be offended. I'd much rather know where people really stand and not force them to hide behind a facade just so everyone feels comfortable. We all know what those words mean even if you just post the first initial of the 'highly offensive word'. How is that any different than seeing it spelled out? Let people reveal themselves...I understand I am in the minority opinion on that.

 

[Rockdiamond]

Really, really offensive.....

 

[chrono]

As a gamer, such words are thrown around carelessly like rain drops during a thunderstorm, without malice or ill intent. It doesn’t bother me even though I understand the history and meaning. It’ll be very different though, if there’s malice, anger, and ill intent behind it.

As a female gamer, I take pains to stay anonymous and keep my gender neutral or as male as possible for personal safety.

 

[cmd2014]

Really offensive. No person deserves to be viewed or treated like they are an object or commodity valued only for the one-sided gratification they can offer. It's dehumanizing and gross.

I realize that sexism and misogyny is common in the gaming community, and personally I think it's really overdue for a cultural overhaul. This stuff is not ok in any context. It's disturbing and gross and perpetuates the idea that it is ok in any context. I hear similar stuff on some bbq forums I belong to (another highly male dominated zone where it doesn't occur to them that women might coexist). It makes me sad for humanity that we have not come further than this.

 

[Matata]

I take pains to stay anonymous and keep my gender neutral or as male as possible for personal safety.

I am totally unaware of what happens in the gaming community. Why is being female a potential threat to your safety?

 

[LemonMoonLex]

Omg the fact that this is even a topic here on PS is hilarious!

I might have a different perspective because Mr. B & I were only 24 & 20 when we had our daughter and we still tend to get looks sometimes for being young parents that have their st*! together, so the term to me is less dirty and more silly. I think our generation sees it the same way.
I honestly wouldnt get offended if someone yelled that at me unless I was with my child.

Plus dont you love seeing a strong beautiful man with a wonderful build being a good dad?
I cant be the only one that
likes the rare and elusive dilfs!

 

[AGBF]

I am totally unaware of what happens in the gaming community. Why is being female a potential threat to your safety?

I do not even know what "the gaming community" is.

 

[partgypsy]

What do you all think if the term Dadbod? I guess I lump milf and dadbod in kind of the same category. Basically I find neither particularly offensive more in the silly/immature category. However if some guy who was into me called me that it would not be a turn on (what- you are attracted both by how I physically look and that I've been able to procreate? What a wonderfully unique compliment to me.)

 

[LemonMoonLex]

I do not even know what "the gaming community" is.

@Matata

Nothing to do with athleticism but it refers to the online video game community where tensions are high and it's male dominated. Most of the boys and men that play allow the darker side of them to come out as they have a semblance of anonymity, and so they're very crude, volatile, and like to push you around verbally. Its mainly childish banter, but believe me if they ever find out youre a girl 99% of the boys playing turn into weird horny hyenas.

The online gaming community has access to mics where they speak to eachother whether theyre on the same team for a game or as opponents.

When I was a young girl my brother would yell for me and I'd walk into his room and he'd want me to speak on his mic again because everyone would go crazy.
"Omg a girl!!!"

Sounds like its still very much this way!

I'd take a wild guess that the average age of an online gamer would be under 18 and more like 15 but Im not sure. So for @chrono and others who mentioned they play; if others found out, the rarity of a mature woman would be shocking as well as what comes out of their mouths there after.

Also many people who play video games tend to be incredibly intelligent (ya, I know the irony) so many of these young boys and men may know how to code or even hack. So if you get one that is infatuated with you and has a few screws loose with the ability to hack...yes it can become dangerous.

 

[partgypsy]

There are article about the term. Apparently people are divided about it. Some people find it highly offensive. Other women use it as a way reclaim their sexuality, after becoming a mom. I guess it's a similar thing where if a friend particular female friend used it as a compliment to my face I wouldn't mind (take as compliment). otherwise it can just be another derogatory sexual term.

 

[Matata]

Thanks for the info @TheGarnetGirl.

 

[partgypsy]

That's funny. Ironically my mom who is her late 70s in addition to scrabulous likes playing online shooter games. She gave herself some neutral Id and turns off her audio. Gamers like to talk trash and actually considering she was an English teacher she can also swear a blue streak (through her messages)! Since she is a novice/relatively inexperienced some gamers guess that she is female and will sometimes hit on my 77 year old mom, which my lil brother finds hilarious. As you can imagine no one in my family is easily offended.

 

[AGBF]

This....I am not generally in favor of editing words or thoughts for the sake of appealing to those who may be offended. I'd much rather know where people really stand and not force them to hide behind a facade just so everyone feels comfortable. We all know what those words mean even if you just post the first initial of the 'highly offensive word'. How is that any different than seeing it spelled out? Let people reveal themselves...I understand I am in the minority opinion on that.

However, you are in good company. Lenny Bruce, who was no dummy, was saying the same thing many years ago. He has a famous recording in which he advocates saying the n-word as many times as possible so that everyone hears it and "when one little black child" is called it as an epithet at school she "doesn't have to come home crying". He was recording these monologues back in the 1950's and 1960's.

 

[Elizabeth35]

One issue with this acronym is that (aside from being juvenile) it is implying that being a mother is unattractive. So if you are attractive after having a child, you are some sort of weird unicorn. It sounds like something someone extremely ignorant and immature would somehow try to pass off as a compliment (which it is not).
The other issue, to me, is describing someone as "ILF" is incredibly crude. Vulgar even.
As if our only worth is for someone to "F"?!?! Really?

Here's a simple barometer. Is it something you would say in a meeting with VP's and CEO's at work? Would you say in in from of your mother? Or HR?

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

Omg the fact that this is even a topic here on PS is hilarious!

I might have a different perspective because Mr. B & I were only 24 & 20 when we had our daughter and we still tend to get looks sometimes for being young parents that have their st*! together, so the term to me is less dirty and more silly. I think our generation sees it the same way.
I honestly wouldnt get offended if someone yelled that at me unless I was with my child.

Plus dont you love seeing a strong beautiful man with a wonderful build being a good dad?
I cant be the only one that
likes the rare and elusive dilfs!

I feel like this might be a generational thing! I’m really young as well and I find a term like MILF/DILF would wildly offend my parents but people my age (I have a few friends who are young moms) just find it silly as hell. I know one of my friends who had a baby a couple years ago has a silly inside joke with her husband where he refers to her as a MILF (obviously as a joke, in private or only around a few very close friends) and she finds it amusing/almost sweet. Of course there’s a vast difference about being called something by your partner in a consensual way and having it yelled down the street after you by someone aggressive trying to intimidate/humiliate you. Its kinda like the term “b*tch” which I use frequently in my friend circle “e.g. you’re a boss-a$$ b*tch” which is A-OK in that context but having someone catcall “you b*tch” wouldn’t be.

Also: good looking dudes who are also amazing dads are the epitome of attractiveness, I’ll bill you for my exploding-ovary surgery, k thanks.

 

[Matata]

There's a lot of stuff that is offensive on a societal level that people find inoffensive on a discrete personal level. The circumstances affecting the offensiveness of something on a discrete level are as varied as the number of people on the planet. Finding something inoffensive on a personal level does not negate its offensiveness on a societal level.

edited to add: Anything that diminishes women to an object will remain offensive on a societal level until women reach equality on all levels.

 

[nala]

I think the term is just silly. Like. When i asked hubby this question he started laughing. He said. Do people actually use that term anywhere? Anymore? Like. Who would even utter it? Would you address someone and say, Hey MiLF or look at that Milf. I teach high school kids and have never heard them say that about anyone. Maybe it’s a regional thing. But if I had to classify it as offensive, yes, bc it operates on so many stereotypes and contains profanity.

 

[sonnyjane]

Can you please stop writing the N word...

Dear lord thank you, that was outrageous to read.

 

[nala]

Dear lord thank you, that was outrageous to read.

It was more outrageous that it seemed to bother very few of us.

 

[AllAboardTheBlingTrain]

There's a lot of stuff that is offensive on a societal level that people find inoffensive on a discrete personal level. The circumstances affecting the offensiveness of something on a discrete level are as varied as the number of people on the planet. Finding something inoffensive on a personal level does not negate its offensiveness on a societal level.

edited to add: Anything that diminishes women to an object will remain offensive on a societal level until women reach equality on all levels.

Serious (curious) question (not trying to be controversial or confrontational in any way), while I do agree about what you said about things having different implications on a discrete/societal level, what is your position on the term DILF then, given your edit? Since arguably men benefit from privilege in a myriad of ways in society. Do you think that both terms are equally offensive or one is worse than the other?