Diamond Advice

[lawmax]

Whatever floats your boat.

We all make these decisions for our own reasons in our own way. Some people end up happy when they continue in this kind of relationship, some just find that things get worse. Whatever.

 

[Googleman]

It seems to me that you are suffering from am impatient young person in love syndrome/want to get married ASAP. You want the ring and you want to be engaged and you don't want to wait (to save up enough money to buy the ring you want in the first place). You are not satisfied with a "small diamond" but your "I want everything NOW" attitude forces you to buy the smaller rock and upgrade everytime you get a couple bucks in the bank instead of just saving to buy the larger ring in the first place. Somehow, I don't believe this is how Jonathan envisioned his upgrade policy working and this isn't how most people behave. (They exercise a little restraint and save up the money to buy the size and quality ring they really want, even if that means it won't happen tomorrow.) You are the epitome of the microwave generation!!!

The attitude you, YOURSELF, have shown on these forums only portrays YOU as immature and impatient. You embarrased yourself by posting on a forum how "Jonathan hadn't responded to your request for an upgrade" only for everyone to find out you had contacted him only TWO days prior!!! You wrote about how Jonathan forgot to call when your ring was going to be a day later than expected. I do respect the fact that you are expecting an expensive diamond, however, did it ever occur to you that NO ONE IS PERFECT and may have forgotten and that you could place a phone call to him!!!! In my opinion, Jonathan has come off very well throughout all this and the only one who ends up looking like a fool is you. I have no interest in Jonathan's business, I just call 'em as I see 'em.

Clearly, when it comes to deciding to get married, age cannot be the sole deciding factor. It's about maturity. And that is one area where you are lacking.

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/15/2003 9:47:35 AM aljdewey wrote:

My advice to you, Jax is this: Just pick one. It won't matter what you pick because you'll never be completely happy with it. I don't mean disrespect, but I honestly don't believe you can have a "better experience" because.....you don't know what you want, you fixate on things that are non-issues, and you never seem to be satisfied. It's like you have to find *something* to agonize over.

Honestly, I've never seen a bigger display of ignorance in my life. First, until you know EVERYTHING that is going on with the situation, why don't you stick to the question presented in the post and not pass rush judgments? The only thing you know about anything that has been going on is what has been said here and on DT. And from that, you form conclusions about peoples characaters, and what they should and shouldn't be happy with. Whether people want to hear it or not, bad experiences happen. I'm not here to talk about the bad experience. I hear to let you know how uninformed you are and how unintellegent you come across for thinking you know someone from a few posts that you read on a board. We had a problem, we want it fixed and to come out with a ring that we're happy about and a good memory to go along with it.

The diamond in question rates an 0.8!!!!! on the HCA. It is positively gorgeous, and you're worried because it gets 2 V/highs and 1 high? Then you're worried that it won't be as nice as the stone you have. If you like the stone you have, then why are you looking for something else.

I'm glad that you know SO much about diamonds. Now that you've let me know how great it is, I think we're going to run and buy it. Thanks. E-mail Jonathan... ask him about HCA scores and how much weight you should put on them when you're picking a diamond. You might actually learn something. And if you actually had the *slightest* clue what you were talking about before you put your $0.02 in, maybe you would know why we're looking for something else.

With regard to your above statement to Jonathan: This is a PERFECT example of what I'm talking about. Jonathan said in his post: "Warning though. If Jax posts the link she still had dibs on it till she gives me the word." And your inpretation of that is to feel pressured. HOW? He just said he won't give anyone else option on it until you determine if you want it or not. You might as well scrap this diamond anyway, because now that you feel "pressured", I'm sure the "experience" on this one will now be sullied beyond repair as well.

Jonathan, you're a saint. If I were in your shoes, I'd have dropped this hot potato a long time ago. Way, WAY too high maintenance.
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You have no idea what Jonathan e-mailed us personally after the link was posted. So... again, nothing even close to intellegent is coming from post. We have our reasons for feeling the way we did. End of story. I don't think I need to justify myself to a bunch of people I don't even know. We were simply looking for advice before the personal attacks came out. If you think that expecting what we actually requested & were promised in the first place is too high maintenance, then you must be spending your life getting walked on like a cheap rug.

It's really been a pleasure reading your posts. I would love to hear more from you in the future!

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/15/2003 6:47

6 PM La Femme wrote:

I completely agree with everything you said, aljdewey. Jonathan, you really /are/ a saint! She gave you a perfect opportunity to drop her, but you've said that you won't. You're a better person than I.

Opportunity to drop her? Since when did stores have the right to just drop their clients? I've never heard of anything like that before... ever.

Jax, you have to understand that from an outsider's POV, it looks like you are a spoiled and demanding princess-type who has a doormat of a fiance. Joe showers you in all sorts of jewelry (most recently the Valentines ring you posted about), and you've upgraded your ring 5 or 6 times now. What do you expect people to think when you keep asking for advice on your next purchase?

Doormat am I? I treat my fiance like a true lady should be treated. Yeah, I get her a lot of nice stuff. Mostly jewelry, because that's what she likes. And I get a lot of nice stuff too... mostly electronics and such, because that's what I like. What business is it of anyone's WHY we've upgraded as much as we have. I think we deserve the same respect that you would give a first time buyer. I'm not one to make judgments about people based on a chat board or how many diamonds they've had. I would assume that most people are the same, but I guess that I'm wrong. No big deal if you don't agree with what we're doing. Just keep it to yourself. You can't honestly think that any good is coming from you making comments like that, can you? I don't really care what people think of me as a person. I know a kind, honest guy. I do care that we're being disrespected because this isn't the first time that we're asking advice about a diamond. That just doesn't make sense to me.

Your alluding to problems you've had with GOG on DT (and here) gets old. Just say what he did that made your experience so horrible. Don't think so highly of yourself to imagine that he'd lose a lot of business from a negative testimonial. He's had not-so-great ones before, and his business appears to be doing fine. But when you go on DT and say that you've had a bad experience with him, only to not say what he did, it makes people think the situation is probably worse than it actually was. So he didn't get back to you promptly at every turn? So your ring arrived one day later than planned? So he's had a hard time finding your perfect stone for the past month? You make it sound like he's done /much/ worse than that.

Maybe if you read all the posts, instead of just selectively reading what you want to, you would know what the bad experience was. That's not really the purpose of my posts. I don't think that Jonathan would lose a ton of business over our experience. That's not even what was intended by posting the bad experience in the first place. What was intended was to use the board for what it's meant... FEEDBACK. Imagine that.

I'm also a firm believer in spending money on what makes you happy - if you have the money. If jewelry is your thing and Joe honestly wants to give it to you, great. But it does make one wonder to see a young couple in their early 20s spending all sorts of money on various pieces of jewelry, and even moreso if the girl in question will soon have a 1.2-1.3 carat rock. Isn't there anything higher on your list of priorities?

How could you even BEGIN to imply "If we have the money"? Are my bank statements getting sent to you again? I'll have to talk to the bank about that. I'm sure the 0 balance came as quite a shock until you realized that it was mine! I can't thank you enough for posting though. The careless spending will stop immeadiatly. Thanks for you input. Me thinks the green-eyed monster is hiding under your bed.

In regrads to whether I "really want to give it to ", that's just silly. I appreciate you implying that I'm without spine, and I can't just give her jewelry on my own, but I think I can take care of myself and figure out what I think she'll like without help.

Thanks again for your post!

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/15/2003 9:31:38 PM liz wrote:

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On 2/15/2003 6:47

6 PM La Femme wrote:

Jax, you have to understand that from an outsider's POV, it looks like you are a spoiled and demanding princess-type who has a doormat of a fiance. Joe showers you in all sorts of jewelry (most recently the Valentines ring you posted about), and you've upgraded your ring 5 or 6 times now. What do you expect people to think when you keep asking for advice on your next purchase?

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Agreed. Jaxie, whether you see yourself this way or not, this is the image your behavior is projecting. Grow up and learn that the world cannot always conform to your exact specifications within your exact time frame.
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Since when did everyone know every last thing that has been requested in this process. Is Jonathan forwarding all the e-mail to you guys? I'll have to check in to that. All we want is to be kept informed and to get what we asked for in the end. I don't know where everyone got the idea that we gave Jonathan a time frame. I think Jonathan can tell you that we didn't give him a timeframe, as well can I tell you that. And I think getting your exact specifications was part of the consumer process. I don't go clothes shopping and buy an XL when I really wear a Medium, just because they don't have a medium. As well, I wouldn't take a diamond that didn't meet up to what I expected from it just because it's the one that's there. And I think that anyone that just takes what is given to them when they're not completely satisfied is going to spend their life getting walked on. Call me demanding or high-maintenence... call me whatever you want. I don't really care. I just want to end up with what I started looking for in the first place. I never realized that was such a bad thing.

The whole "grow up and realize that the world cannot ______________" thing just doesn't work for me. I don't think what we're looking for is an impossible task, and neither does Jonathan. Throughout the process he's even mentioned a few projects that he's been working on for others that are MUCH harder than what we're asking. It just makes you sound like somebody's mother to make a comment like that.

Thanks for your post!

 

[mattinSD]

From GOG site:

"...if the market does not have what you are looking for at the time... do one of two things. Either wait till your stone comes along or better yet just go into that next magic number. For example if you want a diamond that weighs in the 1.40's because you want to save the money you'd be spending on the 1½, go to the 1½ and drop down a color or a clarity. Be flexible to an extent. Or if your jeweler can't find you a stone in the 1.40's but finds you an absolute beauty in the 1.30's BUY IT!!! You'll be anal enough with all the information you are going to want from the jeweler (especially after reading this site), so be willing to be flexible a bit and don't give your jeweler such tightly rigid standards. Don't get me wrong, you want to be picky to an extent. You do want to draw the line somewhere in your clarity, color, cut and weight, but be flexible and have fun!!!"

Unfortunately, you guys ain't having no fun!!! And your not following your vendor's advice...

But the real backlash is a result of airing your dirty laundry in public - I've only starting reading DT and pricescope for a couple weeks, and I know that:

1) you originally bought a engagement ring at Zales (I would assume sometime in the spring of 2002)
2) re-proposed last June with a superbcert (approx 3/4 ct.)
3) upgraded to over a carat since then between June and fall of 2002
4) Been trying to upgrade again for a couple of months since then

Surely you can see how people might get the impression that you guys are impossible to please, overly picky, and immature - Sheesh, I'd be worried that my fiance would be looking to upgrade me!! (I am honestly joking, please don't take that personally...)

I hope things end up working out for you, but I'll leave you with a saying my father used to tell me (slightly editted for language):

"If you crap the bed, don't hang the dirty sheets in the front yard unless you want the nieghbors knowing!"

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/17/2003 10

5:16 AM aljdewey wrote:

You still don't seem to get it. The purpose of my comments were not to defend GOG.....because I personally don't think it matters who you deal with. I think you'll find something to be unhappy about even if you try to work with the Pope to find you a diamond.

I'll say it again in case you just missed it.....I'm not defending GOG. I don't know him at all. I'm saying that you are never happy with anything.

I think we both get it, but I think your ignorance of the situation at hand and any past experiences or rings that we've had has clouded your vision. If we were supposed to get the ok from you or people like you when we wanted to upgrade to a new diamond, then we must have missed that day in school. I think it's great that you're not defending GOG, but confused why you feel it's your personal duty to personally attack people that you don't know. Seems that the opinions we asked for were about a diamond and not why we were upgrading again, or why we were unhappy in the past or why we've had a few diamonds. Thanks for feeling that you had an obligation to completely stray from the point of the post in the first place.

This isn't a personal attack on you, as you think it is. It is an observation based on YOUR comments about the various diamonds you've had to date.

You don't know what you want, you find fault with every stone for the smallest of reasons, and nothing is ever done fast enough for you. Those are my observations based ON YOUR WORDS.

You asked for advice and opinions....and I gave you mine. I'll repeat it, because you apparently missed it: Pick any diamond, because it won't matter what you pick. You won't be happy with it anyway, and if perchance you can't find fault with the stone, you'll most certainly find a way to find fault with "the experience". It is impossible to make you happy in my opinion.

Again, no disrespect meant....just an honest telling of advice and opinions, as YOU asked.
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How could you not mean disrespect by the comments that you're making. You're getting in the middle of a situation which is none of your concern to begin with. That's disrespectful in itself. And tell me or Jax how we should and should not feel and what we should be happy with and what we're never going to be happy with is completely disrespectful, not to mention inconsiderate, uninformed and just plain wrong. I'm glad that you think so much of yourself that you feel that you know exactly how others should feel and DO feel. Again, we didn't ask advice about our life or past experiences, our personalities, our income or wealth or anything of the sort. We asked advice about a DIAMOND, and if you didn't have anything to say about the diamond itself without giving your PERSONAL opinion of Jax or myself, then you probably shouldn't have said anything at all. Perhaps I should attack your parents for not teaching you any proper manners, but I'm not that kind of person.

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/17/2003 1:13:20 PM canadianice wrote:

Pyramid:

Complaining about "the experience" was, apparently, Princess Jax's initial complaint...

Anybody else have dirty laundry to air publicly?

My eyes are doing the Krispy Kreme (or Tim Hortons in Canada) on this thread... completely glazing over.

Public petulance isn't pretty.
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Is the Princess Jax comment all the neccessary? She's a girl that knows what she wants and will let people know when she's not getting treated the way she feels she should. I'm the same way. We got treated great when we got the .70 Superbcert. Look for a post where we're ranting and raving about something bad. Good luck, because there aren't any. It was a great experience. Great service and communication. Exactly what I wanted and expected from GOG and the reason that we recommend him to all our friends, parents and other relatives. Not the same service this time and last. Which is why there are posts. We'll keep the badness private at this point. I'd just like to point out that the only reason GOG and our bad experiences in the past came up is because someone felt the need to start attacking our character for the way that we've choosen to do things.

As any girl would tell you I'm sure(since we've asked quite a few since this started)... if she is a part of the engagement ring experience, and there is something bad that happens along the way from the store you're giving your business to, there will probably be bad feelings associated with the whole engagement experience because you can't help but think about the "badness" that happened with the store. That's how a bad experience can happen. Is it really that big of a deal to everyone else what we're doing? If you don't want to read about it, don't. The thread was just to ask opinions about a diamond we were considering. And the only reason that we had to ask the question here is because we didn't get an answer when we asked the source. And still haven't.

Hope that answers the whole bad experience question for you.

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/17/2003 3

7:30 PM ccuheartnurse wrote:

LOL CanadianIce....by the way, too many Tim Hortons around. haha Then again, at 1am, they wont let you down.

I have been shaking my head since the beginning of your saga stories Jax. The one that you lost me on was the one at Christmas. I really thought you were way off base wailing like a child cause you couldnt get your 1ct that you wanted ASAP. I thought, how childish, doesnt she know its the busiest time of the year? And, correct me if I'm wrong, but wasnt it your fiance who mailed your original ring in late & thats why you got your new one late??

I'm correcting you, because you're wrong. The ring was not mailed late. It's water under the bridge and I'd rather not discuss what happened. If you look around a little more and actually read everything before coming to your conclusions, you might uncover Jonathan's apology for the stuff that happened. We were impatient to a certain extent and he did his share of wrong doing. All water under the bridge and behind us now. And I wish everyone would drop the idea that we were so crushed because it came a day late. We were upset because it was an expensive piece of jewelry that we expected on a certain day and didn't receive. I think it would make anyone a little nervous and upset.

Fast forward just a couple of mths. You say you've been patient for 4 wks now. It took me 7 mths to make up my mind in regards to *my* perfect stone. Of all the vendors that I communcicated with, not many could find what I wanted. I just needed to sit on my hands & wait it out. The stones can only come out of GIA/AGS labs fast enough. And god knows, none of us would buy a stone without either one of those certs to back it up.
.
I dont care what your financial situation is or how old you are. If you want a bigger stone, then get one, if you want a new car, then get one, if you want a pedicure, get one, I dont care. Your life does nothing for mine. I just find it frustrating that you take your dilemas so public. Take them private then you will not get the opinions you dont want to get.

Do we *DESERVE* the treatment we're getting because we asked a question about a diamond on a public forum? Just because we've done it before? I don't think so. I appreciate that you're not prying in to our financial situation and you're all for us doing something we want to do when we want to do it. We just had a question and ended up having to defend ourselves because someone did want to make comments about why we shouldn't be doing this and our financial status. We're sitting tight now, but there were certain things that we were told by Jonathan that we didn't really stress too much when this first started. Now that it's a month in to it, we're starting to ask questions and we expect certain answers. All that's under control though... privately.

I really appreciate you not judging us for what we're doing though, like some many others have. It's a relief to see that there's still a hand full of people with some common courtesy out there. Thanks.

 

[joefelipe]

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On 2/17/2003 5:15:57 PM Googleman wrote:

It seems to me that you are suffering from am impatient young person in love syndrome/want to get married ASAP. You want the ring and you want to be engaged and you don't want to wait (to save up enough money to buy the ring you want in the first place). You are not satisfied with a "small diamond" but your "I want everything NOW" attitude forces you to buy the smaller rock and upgrade everytime you get a couple bucks in the bank instead of just saving to buy the larger ring in the first place. Somehow, I don't believe this is how Jonathan envisioned his upgrade policy working and this isn't how most people behave. (They exercise a little restraint and save up the money to buy the size and quality ring they really want, even if that means it won't happen tomorrow.) You are the epitome of the microwave generation!!!

We've been engaged almost 2 1/2 years now. So I really doubt that we're the impatient young people want to get married ASAP people that you think we are. Thanks for yet another uninformed comment. I don't really think Jonathan cares that we're upgrading again, taking advantage of the policy and spending more money in his store. I'm sure he's glad that you're explaining to everyone how his upgrade policy should be used properly. I respect your feelings about how upgrades should be done, as well I think you should respect ours.

The attitude you, YOURSELF, have shown on these forums only portrays YOU as immature and impatient. You embarrased yourself by posting on a forum how "Jonathan hadn't responded to your request for an upgrade" only for everyone to find out you had contacted him only TWO days prior!!! You wrote about how Jonathan forgot to call when your ring was going to be a day later than expected. I do respect the fact that you are expecting an expensive diamond, however, did it ever occur to you that NO ONE IS PERFECT and may have forgotten and that you could place a phone call to him!!!! In my opinion, Jonathan has come off very well throughout all this and the only one who ends up looking like a fool is you. I have no interest in Jonathan's business, I just call 'em as I see 'em.

Just so you know... we called him a number of times that day. Perhaps you just don't know enough about the situation to be making any comment on it at all. The store was called and a message was left (no one there), and his cell phone was called and a message was left (no answer), and an e-mail. Thanks for bringing that up though. My young mind would have never thought of calling him. And it was a little more than two days. Try a couple weeks. Atleast get your story straight if you're going to attack someone. You just come off as a rude, uninformed gossip otherwise. And we've admitted to being impartient and Jonathan has admitted to his wrongdoings and we're straight on that issue now. Why keep bringing it up if the people involved have settled it already? It just adds to your ignorance.

Clearly, when it comes to deciding to get married, age cannot be the sole deciding factor. It's about maturity. And that is one area where you are lacking.
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Maturity is restaining yourself when you're not familiar with a situation, and not making judgments when you don't know the whole story or the people involved. Maybe someday you'll realize that.

 

[Colored Gemstone Nut]

Jax172/JoeFillipe:

I have been reading this post for days now. I personally read all the info and can honestly say, save yourself further frusteration and stop posting. Any other info that you guys need to work out either do it with class with personally contacting the other party involved. I think everyone agrees we should put this thread to rest. Don't try to defend yourselves anymore and rationalize with people who don't know the facts and can't see the situation for what it was or what the both of you know happened. Save yourself the worry from the critics who never intend to know the situation at hand and just assume things. Your situation was unpleasant and that's that. Move on because I'll tell you guys life is too short to put up with the non-sense. I'm glad you guys shared your experiences in the thread, but take the high and don't you think we should put this baby to rest.

Josh Rioux
Sitka, Alaska

 

[hazeghi]

From Joe's posts so far, it sounds like he suffers from the same prima donna attitude as his fiance. Congratulations! You guys are perfect for each other!!

Hazeghi

 

[Maria D]

Joe (if in fact you *are* Joe; it wouldn't be the first time someone on these forums came on posing as a spouse just to cause trouble!) take a deep breath.

Yes, Jax172 asked a fair question. But please also notice that she got quite a few very fair answers -- the gist of which was that no, one H reading on the B-scope shouldn't be a problem but perhaps the best thing to do would be to get the stone and compare it to the stone you already have. You have to admit that this is good advice that sticks to the topic at hand and doesn't get into anything personal.

So what does Jax172 reply?

>>First, No I cannot view the stone before deciding, we'd have to pay for it first, and we're doing an upgrade, so they'd have to have my diamond back, or we'd have to pay the full amount. If we sent my ring back to them, then I could not compare the diamonds. And we don't have $9,600 to give them so we can view the ring.
So all that good advice is basically useless to Jax. She also wrote:

>>Second, Jonathan I did not post the webpage because I didn't want other people to see it and the want it, thus causing me to feel rushed into deciding just yet.
Notice how here Jax has moved past the original technical question and is now talking about personal feelings. She doesn't want to feel rushed, she wants the stone to sit in inventory while she decides. And how will she decide? Not by comparing (can't do that), and not by considering the opinions of forum members on the b-scope reading (ignores that); it's all just so hopeless!

Perhaps if Jax172 had thought to say something like "thanks for all your advice, I will take it under consideration" instead of continuing on and on in the same old vein this whole thread would not have gotten completely out of hand.

I wish you luck in your search for the optimum e-ring and e-ring shopping experience.

toodles

 

[Jax172]

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On 2/17/2003 7:40

3 PM mattinSD wrote:

From GOG site:

"...if the market does not have what you are looking for at the time... do one of two things. Either wait till your stone comes along or better yet just go into that next magic number. For example if you want a diamond that weighs in the 1.40's because you want to save the money you'd be spending on the 1½, go to the 1½ and drop down a color or a clarity. Be flexible to an extent. Or if your jeweler can't find you a stone in the 1.40's but finds you an absolute beauty in the 1.30's BUY IT!!! You'll be anal enough with all the information you are going to want from the jeweler (especially after reading this site), so be willing to be flexible a bit and don't give your jeweler such tightly rigid standards. Don't get me wrong, you want to be picky to an extent. You do want to draw the line somewhere in your clarity, color, cut and weight, but be flexible and have fun!!!"

Unfortunately, you guys ain't having no fun!!! And your not following your vendor's advice...

But the real backlash is a result of airing your dirty laundry in public - I've only starting reading DT and pricescope for a couple weeks, and I know that:

1) you originally bought a engagement ring at Zales (I would assume sometime in the spring of 2002)
2) re-proposed last June with a superbcert (approx 3/4 ct.)
3) upgraded to over a carat since then between June and fall of 2002
4) Been trying to upgrade again for a couple of months since then

Surely you can see how people might get the impression that you guys are impossible to please, overly picky, and immature - Sheesh, I'd be worried that my fiance would be looking to upgrade me!! (I am honestly joking, please don't take that personally...)

This would be true had we started this in 2002. But Actually we've been engaged since September 2000. And your missing a few steps, but whats the point no one gets the story straight anyways. And to be honest, I don't seem what everyone's problem is with us upgrading my ring. Sure, if it was true that I was a terrible witch who only wanted a big diamond this might have some relevance. However, if you'd read any of the posts properly you'd surely notice that the only reason an upgrade started was because the Zales diamond scratched and we got such poor service from them that we started to educate ourselves about diamonds. It was my fiance who decided he'd like to give me a nicer ring for Christmas of 2001. And it was only after we got that ring that we found DT and started to learn about Hearts and Arrows diamonds. My fiance decided on his own, to get me a 0.70 Superbcert (and this is no business of yours, but because no one can get past it) to repropose to me. Not because we'd broken up or because I made him, but because of a personal situation during the first engagement that cast a shadow upon the joy of being engaged (I was very ill, and that is all I'll say as I don't think I need to explain myself to any of you). If we'd never had the problem with the Zales ring, I'd never have learned about diamonds, and I's still have that ring. All I wanted was to be engaged when we got engaged. But seeing as we DO have the money now and my fiance wants to give me the ring of my dreams, I don't see what business it is of anyone elses that we upgraded my ring before. Our relationship has not changed. We've been together since 1998, and not once have we broken up. Even when our relationship was under tremendous stress because of my illness. He's my hero in more ways than I can ever say. And what you think about us upgrading is totally and utterly false. We're not compromising anything in our lives by upgrading, and it is certainly not bothering Jonathan because he makes money off of it.

I hope things end up working out for you, but I'll leave you with a saying my father used to tell me (slightly editted for language):

"If you crap the bed, don't hang the dirty sheets in the front yard unless you want the nieghbors knowing!"

Thanks but this doesn't really apply to us because we've aired no "dirty laundry" as I see it. Yes I've told my engagement and upgrade story but it isn't anything to be ashamed about. I'm sorry that you think it is. It's actually quite a nice story, because to us, the love that we share has nothing to do with a ring. It could be made of tin foil and we'd still be together. And the fact that we've never gone into debt over a ring is also pretty amazing considering what alot of young people do. Maybe some people would have done it differently, maybe they would have waited until we had money all at once to go from a 0.50 Zales non certified diamond to a 1.04 Certed diamond. But that is them and this is us and we're happy with it, and no one asked your opinion on how we've upgraded our diamond. We have no problems with how we've ended up with the current ring. And I don't think Jonathan cares too much either considering we've only upgraded with him once so far. We're far from abusing his upgrade policy, though I've known a few DTers who have upgraded a diamond after less than a year and have only spent a couple hundred more. And he was glad to do it. Because he's that kind of guy. Which is a great thing, because most places will ask you to spend twice as much in order to upgrade (which by the way we did this last time around). But I don't think GOG would agree with any of you that we're abusing his upgrade policy.

You know I've gotten subtle accusations that I'm putting us into debt and that we don't really have the money to spend. Yet, people are also telling us we're wrong to upgrade a little at a time. Never mind that the upgrades happened more because of the diamond education we were getting rather than because of our desire to constantly make the ring better. Nor was it because we are unsure of what we want.

What I wanted most last time was to end up with a gorgeous ring from my wonderful fiance. But I also didn't want to have to get into arguments with the vendor. I highly respect Jonathan, which is why the last business transaction with him ws rather upsetting and dissappointing. As my fiance has stated, none of you know the whole story and are none of you are privy to all the little things that did or did not happen. So none of you can comment on my "experience" or how I ought to be happy with it. I'm not going to go into anymore of why we were so upset because people will choose to believe what they want to even when I post what happened. People are selective in what they remember and quite a few of you have rushed to post and pass judgement on us before researching the topic properly. Many of you have posted things that if you'd gone back and read, you'd see were incorrect.

I have personally placed a phone call to Jonathan so that I may speak with him in person to ask him a few things. It appears that he believes and sees things differently than us. But no assumptions are being made as to whom is correct. Because honestly, it is all in perception anyways, and when persons outside the loop attack, it can get heated and escalated to an extent that it is impossible to see what a person's true intentions behind certain actions may have been.

At this point, I will apologize to Jonathan about anything that may have come out here in the forum that he personally feels was not something he would like to have discussed in a public forum. It came out simply because I felt I had to defend myself from an unwarranted and very personal attack. In the process I said more about my current experience with GOG than I had intended to. I have been in constant contact with GOG from the beginning and neither of our tempers flarred until I posted asking advice and got slammed for it. I sincerely hope that Jonathan feels as I do that we ought not bring outsiders opinions into this any longer as I think we both agree that no one but my fiance and I and GOG know what is truely going on. My fiance and I felt it right to try and correct a few thing on here that are no true because our reputations as decent human beings is being attacked when all we came here for some diamond advice. If you did not feel like offering any because you don't like me because I've upgraded before or because I posted about my bad experience with GOG in the past, than you did not have to comment. I will admit that Jonathan and I are not seeing eye to eye on quite a few issues at the present time. I cannot speak for Jonathan, but I know that my fiance and I still hold him in high regard and we are going to try to work things out in a calm and professional manner. No, we will not be buying the 1.34 and no, we will not be having Jonathan sell the 1.04 so I can work with a different vendor. I've wanted to work with GOG from the beginning because we've had 3 excellent experiences with them, and I trust him to find us what we need. Tempers got out of control because of some comments that truthfully I ought have ignored because they were silly and aimed at starting a flame war. Which indeed they succeeded and msotly because I am too sensitive for my own good. I personally do not treat people that way and it really bothers me when people post things about me that are untrue. My fiance and I have said everything we have to say. I've realized that people will continue to believe anything they want to and that is fine with me. The only people that matter to me at this point, is Jonathan, my fiance and I.

So once again I apologize to Jonathan for not being able to just ignore people who were clearly not interested in getting into any constructive discussion about diamonds. Which if you read my first post is clearly what I came here for. I never gave Jonathan a time line and I never was upset that we had not yet found the diamond we wanted. I can keep waiting as long as Jonathan and I can facilitate a relationship in which my fiance and I are kept informed on what is and is not being done. When communication fails, feelings get hurt and misunderstandings occur. I think Jonathan knows that neither I nor my fiance has ever tried to maliciously hurt him or his company. I am looking forwad to speaking with him personally because I think that this is the only way we will both get the answers we need. As I believe Jonathan may have misunderstood some of what we've said. Likewise, we probably misunderstood some of what he said. Either way, we're going to keep this a private matter from now on.

If people still feel the need to attack our characters there is nothing else I can do except say (since I've gotten some clever quotes from posters parents, here is one of my own mothers favorites) "If that is what knocks your socks off..."

 

[liz]

Somebody shoot this thread. Put it out of its misery.

 

[ringbling17]

I couldn't resist the urge to respond to this thread.
First of all ,Jax, I just want to say that I am truly sorry that you have had the experiences that you have been having in purchasing your diamond engagement ring.
With that said, I also believe that Jonathan has shown that he is more than willing to continue to work with you and help you find the diamond of your dreams.
I do believe that everyone here has been overly critical of your decision to upgrade, it really is none of their business, but the fact remains- no one would have ever known about it if you had never posted it!
What your fiance is doing, I think, is commendable. Not only is he trying to buy you the best engagement ring he can afford, he has also shown that he is willing to fight for you till the end (of the thread at least).
As far as your original post regarding the scores on the brilliancescope- I am in the process of purchasing a diamond that was never checked on the brilliancescope. Prior to me finding this diamond, I continually posted threads such as "Is this diamond okay, etc." But once I found this one, I never posted a thread on whether or not I should buy this diamond. I just knew this was the one for me. It is everything I am looking for.
I personally believe that you should also continue searching until you find the one that you want. If you already have questions about the BS results on this 1.34, then maybe this is not the one for you.
Just be patient. You are already wearing a beautiful diamond ring (love that royal crown)and everyone already knows your engaged.
If you are planning on getting the Royal Crown again, some of your friends may not even notice a different diamond until you tell them, anyway.
Maybe you should just go with a 1.5 to 2.0 carat and then you won't have to upgrade ever again. Sorry, don't want to assume that you are upgrading for size, just most people do it for this reason.
Anyway, good luck with everything.
Just my $.02

 

[Richard Sherwood]

BANG!