Are you blunt or sugar coaty?

[Steel]

Blunt.

Except with DH, I am diplomatic with him.

 

[icekid]

With people I am close with (hubby, sister, close friends), I am blunt. With others, sugar coat it!

 

[isaku5]

I''m blunt when I see the need for it. I''m also a pacifist most of the time - kind of contradictory, but I''m not sugar coaty at all.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 5/17/2009 4:24:44 AM
Author: musey
I'm definitely a sugar-coater, at least to some degree. I've found it's hardly ever productive to be excessively blunt, at least not in my own social and work situations.

Unless you're critiquing Susan Boyle, huh?

 

[musey]

It wasn't meant to be a critique (I think of that word as serving a constructive purpose, and since I wasn't speaking to Susan Boyle... you know?), it was sharing of my personal reaction/opinion that was questioned/not understood, that turned into expansion of where my opinion came from............. Deco, are you Susan Boyle?? Otherwise, I can't imagine why on earth you care(d) so much about my opinion

Regardless, I think you've long since made your point about my ever-so-annoying fun-sucking/offensive personal opinions on the subject (if you're just joking, it's not coming across). I already said I would refrain from any comment on the entertainment industry in the future, and I have kept that promise thus far.

 

[zoebartlett]

I like knowing what others are thinking, so I guess I prefer people to be *honest* with me about things. "Blunt" sounds harsh.

 

[steph72276]

I would say I''m more blunt online than in real life, but I think there is almost always a nice way to say things and still tell the truth.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 5/18/2009 1:50:03 AM
Author: musey

It wasn''t meant to be a critique (I think of that word as serving a constructive purpose, and since I wasn''t speaking to Susan Boyle... you know?), it was sharing of my personal reaction/opinion that was questioned/not understood, that turned into expansion of where my opinion came from............. Deco, are you Susan Boyle?? Otherwise, I can''t imagine why on earth you care(d) so much about my opinion

Regardless, I think you''ve long since made your point about my ever-so-annoying fun-sucking/offensive personal opinions on the subject (if you''re just joking, it''s not coming across). I already said I would refrain from any comment on the entertainment industry in the future, and I have kept that promise thus far.

Ditto. Don''t like it, don''t read it.

I''d say I''m blunt

 

[TravelingGal]

Musey, I think Deco is teasing you - a good ol'' fashioned ribbing.

I''m not blunt for the sake of being blunt. Good interpersonal skills means you know when to coat, and when not to. I don''t need to be that person who will always tell it like it is. I value feelings and my real life relationships. I''m a believer in the sh*t sandwich (the real meat delivered in between something a bit softer).

I''m too impatient to surround myself with people I don''t care for, and since I do, I don''t mind coating reality with love. With strangers or acquaintaces, I''m always polite, and figure those people don''t care to hear the truth anyway.

On pricescope? Sweet as pie, of course.

 

[tlh]

HONEST.

By whatever means necessary.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Date: 5/18/2009 12:38:29 PM
Author: TravelingGal
On pricescope? Sweet as pie, of course.

LIES!

Kidding, of course

I personally have no problem with your bluntness (most of the time - we all have our moments). What I dislike is when someone is blunt for the sake of being an a-hole. I have to wonder why they are so insecure that they have to constantly belittle others. I agree with your statement about knowing when to coat and when not to - my mom would be a great example of coating!

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 5/18/2009 1:50:03 AM
Author: musey

It wasn''t meant to be a critique (I think of that word as serving a constructive purpose, and since I wasn''t speaking to Susan Boyle... you know?), it was sharing of my personal reaction/opinion that was questioned/not understood, that turned into expansion of where my opinion came from.

Is this a critique of my use of the word critique? How blunt! C''mon ... OF COURSE I''M KIDDING. I just thought it was funny to read how being blunt just "isn''t your lifestyle" yet in the Susan Boyle thread you were talking about your gang finds it fun to dissect performances down to their vaguest nuances. Seemed contradictory! But I''m not like hunting you down looking for inconsistencies or anything. I thought you''d chuckle at the observation. WhatEVS.

And Monkeypie: eat a bag of

s.

 

[MonkeyPie]

I don''t think blunt is the same as dissecting someone''s performance...unless she was outright telling Susan Boyle to her face that she was not as good as she thinks she is!

blunt
  /blʌnt/
1. having an obtuse, thick, or dull edge or point; rounded; not sharp: a blunt pencil.
2. abrupt in address or manner: a blunt, ill-timed question.
3. slow in perception or understanding; obtuse: His isolation has made him blunt about the feelings of others.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/18/2009 12:52:53 PM
Author: MonkeyPie
I don''t think blunt is the same as dissecting someone''s performance...unless she was outright telling Susan Boyle to her face that she was not as good as she thinks she is!

blunt
  /blʌnt/
1. having an obtuse, thick, or dull edge or point; rounded; not sharp: a blunt pencil.
2. abrupt in address or manner: a blunt, ill-timed question.
3. slow in perception or understanding; obtuse: His isolation has made him blunt about the feelings of others.

I don''t understand your definition and I think it was unnecessary.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 5/18/2009 12:52:53 PM
Author: MonkeyPie
I don't think blunt is the same as dissecting someone's performance...unless she was outright telling Susan Boyle to her face that she was not as good as she thinks she is!
blunt
1. having an obtuse, thick, or dull edge or point; rounded; not sharp: a blunt pencil.
2. abrupt in address or manner: a blunt, ill-timed question.
3. slow in perception or understanding; obtuse: His isolation has made him blunt about the feelings of others.

BLUNT
Pronunciation:
\ˈblənt\
Function:
adjective
Etymology:
Middle English
Date:
13th century
1 a: slow or deficient in feeling : insensitive b: obtuse in understanding or discernment : dull
2: having an edge or point that is not sharp (a blunt instrument)
3 a: abrupt in speech or manner b: being straight to the point : direct

 

[MonkeyPie]

Alright, so apparently we have two different definitions. I guess my dictionary is somehow incorrect. I''m done then

 

[CurlySue]

For the most part, I''m diplomatic.

But when I lose my patience with someone (or have imbibed too much alcohol), I can be pretty blunt. Those are not necessarily what I consider to be my finer moments.

 

[D&T]

alrighty ladies, *HUGS* blunt can mean many things for different people and the degree of bluntness varies and it just interest me on how we intereact with certain people, family, stranger, and of course PS

 

[musey]

Date: 5/18/2009 12:49:10 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 5/18/2009 1:50:03 AM
Author: musey

It wasn't meant to be a critique (I think of that word as serving a constructive purpose, and since I wasn't speaking to Susan Boyle... you know?), it was sharing of my personal reaction/opinion that was questioned/not understood, that turned into expansion of where my opinion came from.

Is this a critique of my use of the word critique? How blunt! C'mon ... OF COURSE I'M KIDDING. I just thought it was funny to read how being blunt just 'isn't your lifestyle' yet in the Susan Boyle thread you were talking about your gang finds it fun to dissect performances down to their vaguest nuances. Seemed contradictory! But I'm not like hunting you down looking for inconsistencies or anything. I thought you'd chuckle at the observation. WhatEVS.

And Monkeypie: eat a bag of

s.

Deco, like I said, the 'kidding' just wasn't coming across. Glad to hear that you were, but I was (and am) feeling frustrated by the repeated re-emergence of that topic. Makes it seem like it's at best "mostly" joking.

It was not a 'critique' of your word choice at all, I just didn't find 'critique' to be an accurate descriptor of my motivation so I wanted to clarify where I was coming from. Doesn't mean you didn't find it to be accurate, based upon your own interpretation of my words. I just dislike feeling as though I (whether my words or simply the intention behind them) have been misunderstood, that's all (which is why I'm going to go ahead and post this whole thing even though I am more than a bit afraid of your wrath, deco!).

Here's my meager attempt to make up for this threadjack

: How I speak in (relative) privacy about strangers who put themselves out for judgment does not reflect upon how I interact with those in my real life. To me, being blunt requires a familiarity with the subject as well as actually directing the words to them, which is impossible in the case of 'celebrities.' My familiarity with shows like the Susan Boyle one ends with American Idol, which is asking its viewers to form opinions and vote on its contestants. So I'm completely used to watching shows like that with the purpose of deciding who I do or don't like based upon the kinds of things that I discussed in relation to Susan Boyle.

That does not mean at all that I would share such thoughts with a friend, say, after they finished a karaoke number. It's all about the context (inviting opinions vs. not) and the audience ('celebrity' who I have no vested interest in and who will never notice/care about my opinion vs. someone in my own life who I care about). If said friend asked for my completely honest opinion of her performance (though I can't imagine why one would in a karaoke situation, but just for argument's sake), I would give her some constructive criticism. But not "you were flat, and your rhythm was completely off on the bridge," it would be "It sounded like you were having trouble hearing the track at first, and watch the meter when you're going in to the bridge because it's tricky there." That's where I draw the line between sugar-coated and blunt. Simply a filter, or choosing words carefully. It's not a lack of opinion-sharing, or entering your 'delusional echo chamber,' it's just finding a kinder way to say something that you feel needs to be said.

While we're at it, that was the approach I was using in the Boyle thread. I was not being blunt in there (eta: in my own opinion, to my understanding of the definition), I was sharing my opinion in as polite a way as I could at the time (which was before I realized that that thread was for gushing, not opinions).

I totally get the humor (haha musey's inconsistent and/or a liar) you were pointing out, but I'm just saying that they're two completely different contexts, and therefore do not reflect upon one another.

 

[musey]

Date: 5/17/2009 4:24:44 AM
Author: musey
I'm definitely a sugar-coater, at least to some degree. I'll be blunt with my family, but not overly so.

I've found it's hardly ever productive to be excessively blunt, at least not in my own social and work situations. Some peoples' lifestyles call for it, but mine doesn't.

I knew I threw a disclaimer in there.

Sharing opinions on Susan Boyle does not = my own social and/or work situation(s). Unless Susan Boyle were my friend or coworker, in which case my style of interaction with her would be completely different.

 

[decodelighted]

WRATH!!! RRrrrrrrrrrrr

**giggle**

I think the misunderstanding stems from different interpretations of the line "I''ve found it''s hardly ever productive to be excessively blunt, at least not in my own social and work situations. Some peoples'' lifestyles call for it, but mine doesn''t."

You mean: that you''re not blunt TO the people in your social and work situations.

I meant: that you are in fact blunt AROUND the people in your social & work situations. At least as far as engaging in a somewhat technical level of criticism of people who are putting themselves out there for said criticism. i.e. : Ms. Susan Boyle.

** deep bow **

END SCENE

 

[musey]

Date: 5/18/2009 1:41:10 PM
Author: decodelighted
I think the misunderstanding stems from different interpretations of the line 'I've found it's hardly ever productive to be excessively blunt, at least not in my own social and work situations. Some peoples' lifestyles call for it, but mine doesn't.'

You mean: that you're not blunt TO the people in your social and work situations.

I meant: that you are in fact blunt AROUND the people in your social & work situations. At least as far as engaging in a somewhat technical level of criticism of people who are putting themselves out there for said criticism. i.e. : Ms. Susan Boyle.

Yep, precisely.

Like I said, "blunt" to me requires a present subject. If I knew that Susan Boyle were a PS regular and reading that thread, I would call my posts 'blunt' (even though I could have been much more so). Since she isn't (to my knowledge), it doesn't feel like 'bluntness' to me, it's just me sharing my opinion in a neutral area. Well, in theory neutral, because it didn't occur to me that anyone would have such a vested interest in her!

 

[HollyS]

I''m a straight shooter. It''s not as if I could lie about that here on PS.

But I don''t think bluntness is necessarily unkind. It doesn''t have to be.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 5/17/2009 1:12:18 AM
Author: Dancing Fire
why don''t you tell me? am i blunt or the sugar coaty type ?

*snort*

I hesitate to call you ''blunt'' when your tongue is as sharp as the knives at Benihana.

And we wouldn''t have it any other way.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 5/18/2009 1:44:27 PM
Author: musey
Yep, precisely.

Like I said, ''blunt'' to me requires a present subject. If I knew that Susan Boyle were a PS regular and reading that thread, I would call my posts ''blunt'' (even though I could have been much more so). Since she isn''t (to my knowledge), it doesn''t feel like ''bluntness'' to me, it''s just me sharing my opinion in a neutral area. Well, in theory neutral, because it didn''t occur to me that anyone would have such a vested interest in her!

Well we can agree on something then. As to the "vested interest" ... mwhahahaha. If someone defended Pilot Charles "Sully" Sullenberger against comments about his "stupid, outdated mustache" do they have a "vested interest" in him? I guess I''m a Boyle-bot, now?

You''re acting like I''ve been bringing this up ad nauseum. Linkies?

 

[HollyS]

Time for pie?

Make mine a coconut creme, please. Yum.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/18/2009 2:08:42 PM
Author: HollyS
Time for pie?

Make mine a coconut creme, please. Yum.

OMG Holly, are you HALL MONITORING?

 

[HollyS]

Date: 5/18/2009 2:09:43 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 5/18/2009 2:08:42 PM
Author: HollyS
Time for pie?

Make mine a coconut creme, please. Yum.

OMG Holly, are you HALL MONITORING?

No. Far be it from me to Net Nanny anyone. I was merely reminded that this is the point where we usually discuss 'pie', and since lunch is next on my agenda, I was daydreaming about my fav.

Deco and Musey can take care of themselves.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Mmm, pie.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 5/18/2009 2:20:15 PM
Author: MonkeyPie
Mmm, pie.

That''s what I''M talking about!