Would you be disappointed...

[Diamond*Dana]

I would not be disappointed with either! For me, it is what the ring symbolizes...my husband picked my ring himself, all I told him was that I wanted a pear (I think that I even told him that 1/3 carat was fine)...he totally stunned me with a .62 that was and is plenty big for me. Incidently, I am a 35 year old from Ohio

If you cannot see the 2 side by side to compare, I am sure that they are both very beautiful stones. Go with what you are finacially comfortable with and I am sure that your GF will ove it as much as she loves you!

 

[Sparkles22]

Date: 2/20/2008 5:32:03 PM
Author: jayrenay9

Date: 2/20/2008 5:27:23 PM
Author: Haven


And you can always surprise her with the actual proposal--my FI did, and we picked out the ring together!

This is how we did it also. I loved being part of the process and making the decision together.

I think this is a great idea! I think the proposal is what she will be happiest about

. I would have been happy with either 0.81 or 1.0 at the time, but a RB... no, that''s just not me. We went ring shopping together and picked out what we could afford, he surprised me with the when/where/how of the proposal and I thought that was terrific! It made me really fall in love with the ring too (since the memories attached to it were so happy)!

 

[kelpie]

Don''t worried about her being disappointed. Believe me, she''ll be over the moon no matter what you pick. Just take in consideration her tastes and preferences and your buying power. For clues about what size she might have chosen for herself think about where she falls on the spectrum of "earthy crunchy" to "liz taylor", what her height and build is, and how rough on her hands she is (i.e. if she is a chef or plays tennis every morning opt for smaller).

 

[CNOS128]

While I wouldn''t be disappointed in a .81 per se, I would feel like it was a little small (but you can afford what you can afford; there''s always time for an upgrade). Of course, I live in NYC and most of the recently engaged women I know have diamonds well over 2 carats. But outside of NY, and in some circles within, I think .81 is considered really lovely.

And it''s not really all about the ring, you know?

 

[lisa1.01fvs1]

Hi Dave,

I went for the 1 ct.

No extraordinary logic except that I thought it might help fend off DSS for a while

I love it and I wear a size 4.25 and drive a sensible car and yet went whole hog on that damned ring!

I guess diamonds in and of themselves don''t make much sense if practicality is your guide (although the wallet feels pretty practical to me).

Lisa

 

[coatimundi_org]

Date: 2/20/2008 5:44:31 PM
Author: Lynn B
Several random thoughts, in no particular order...


Assuming the cut is excellent, I am a SIZE GIRL, and all other things being equal, I would definitely prefer the 1 carat.

BUT, I am also a practical girl, and wouldn't want my fiance to go into debt over a ring... so if the extra 2K was a hardship, then I would happily take the .81!

BUT, if you drop color and clarity, you can probably get to the 1 carat mark (or darn close) for the same money as the .81. Keep cut your priority, and ask Jon about a killer H, I, J or even K color stone. I have a beautiful AGS-0 2.36 RB that is a J/SI2, it is totally eyeclean and faces up beautifully white. My diamond studs, approximately .75 each, are both AGS-0 K/SI1s and they are little fireballs! I LOVE J and K color stones!


And last but not least, GOG has a great upgrade policy, so if you are OK with her possibly upgrading someday, then what you get now isn't necessarily her one-and-only stone... and THAT can take some of the *pressure* off now!

What Lynn said

I'm crazy about size, but I'm very frugal--strange combo eh? If my husband bought me something that was beyond our means, I wouldn't be happy. I'd be very happy to receive whatever he could give me.

I just wanted to point out Mariposa's ring. I'm so in love with her ring--a .53 ACA.

Her setting is just so beautiful. It has a graceful balance that would alter with a larger stone. I think it's perfection. I would have loved to receive this as my original ering.

link to mariposa's ring

Different settings can change everything.

So many factors going into this emotionally charged purchase.
You sound very thoughtful! Good Luck!

 

[Haven]

I also meant to add in my original response that I wouldn't be disappointed with ANYTHING my FI proposed with, which is really the answer to your question.

AND, I should warn you that going through the ring selection process can turn YOU into a size-guy, that's what happened to my FI. We went from looking for a yellow sapphire to ending up with a 2 ct cushion diamond, and I was not the one driving the size up (not that I argued against it . . . ) I'm just sayin' . . .

 

[ksinger]

All I can say is I have a size 5.75 finger and I just love my .81 H&A. Most people assume that it''s a carat. He let me (I absolved HIM of the mind-boggling work is what HE''D say), pick the stone, within a known price range. He just OK''d it. Not romantic? Maybe not, but then we''ve known each other for a bit (28 years). We''re old married already, trust me.

If your lady is as practical as she sounds, she will probably not appreciate you straining your resources. If you are young and getting married, you''re going to have enough ''acquisitions'' to make right now without putting a strain on the budget for a diamond. (That''s the crusty old 45 year old talking now)

Would I like a larger diamond? Well, DUH! But then like many on this board I''m a diamond FREAK: The more the better!!! However, we decided to put those extra $$$ towards the kitchen remodel - new lighting, cabinets, granite counters, tile floors, pantry. It''s SWEET. And he cooks for me. Far more romantic than a stone, IMO. But would I give up the diamond I have - as in trade up? Wow. That''s a toughy. Once a rock is on my hot little fist, (so to speak), I''m hard pressed to give it up. But I do think the advice you''ve received to go with a company that has a trade-up policy, a very good idea. I was not a PS''er at the time of our diamond purchase, so didn''t go with a place with a trade-up policy. Just as well, because I''d be agonizing now. As it is, all I have to do now is figure out how to get another one!

 

[iheartscience]

I say get the bigger one if you can afford it! I personally wanted at least a 1 carat diamond before I even really started researching...it was just the magic number or something! And I am the first in my circle of friends to get engaged, so I had no real reason for wanting a 1 carat. Of course, the more I researched, the bigger the diamond I needed, so I ended up with a 1.5 carat.

Oh, and I third or fourth the suggestion to check out H and I SI1s to get to that one carat for less than $2k. I have I color ACA H&A diamond earrings from WF and they are as white as can be!

 

[star sparkle]

My BF will be proposing with a .82ct ACA, and I couldn''t be more excited!

For our situation right now, this was the best choice for us. I''ll most likely be upgrading sometime in the future, but for now I feel like this is going to be absolutely perfect.

 

[3shebabes]

I don''t have anything new or earth-shattering to add - but these thoughts make sense to me:

*Go for a bit more size - most women are thrilled with a slightly bigger diamond when given the choice

*Look for something CLOSE to a carat but not exactly a carat - saves money - but hard to find, I know (Something like .95-.99, maybe...)

*Definitely consider dropping in color & clarity (H, SI1 is a great compromise in my opinion -- but many women really love warmer I and J colored stones,too)

Even if you opt for something in the .80 carat range instead -- feel confident that it is still a very nice sized stone. Yes, there are places in this country where that would be considered on the small side (big cities, of course) but believe me -- I think there are many more places where a .80 carat diamond would be considered quite a nice size! Not sure if anyone else has mentioned this -- but ask yourself whether she''d prefer a larger stone in a simple, plain setting -- or a slightly smaller stone in a more elaborate setting...that may help you decide how to spend your budget.

Good luck and have fun! It''s kind of like a treasure hunt really!

 

[Imdanny]

Personally I think .81 is an elegant size, and out of those two combinations I''d rather have the .81 G VS2. Maybe that''s just me, but that''s how I feel.

 

[Gr8fulDave]

Wow, thanks to all for takiing the time to give me your thoughtful responses; I never expected to get so many replies. You have given me a lot to think about and I appreciate all the feedback. Now, where is that coin for me to toss?

A few random comments: The trade-up policy is great but she is very sentimental so I doubt that she would want to trade in the original stone. She is wearing her mother''s two-stone ring (old european-cut round stones that maybe are .6-.7 tcw) as a RHR so that is where I''m getting the notion that she would prefer a RB diamond. The marriage proposal itself will not be a surprise but the timing, location, and manner will be. (actually, they are a surprise to me also right now as I haven''t gotten that far yet.) I will definitely solicit her input as this is too big a decision for me to make alone.

Finally, I do realize that there is no "right" answer as this is a very personal decision that depends on a lot of parameters that are unique to each individual.

Love means nothing in tennis and everything in life.

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 2/21/2008 12:18:18 AM
Author: Gr8fulDave

She is wearing her mother''s two-stone ring (old european-cut round stones that maybe are .6-.7 tcw) as a RHR so that is where I''m getting the notion that she would prefer a RB diamond.

Dave, I really would suggest at least finding out for sure what shape stone she wants. I used to wear an heirloom ring as well and it was special b/c it was an heirloom, not because that''s the shape stone I''d want for my e-ring so i wouldn''t use that as an automatic guess that she''d 100% choose a round. with all the wonderful shapes out there many gals have said they might have choose something different had they even known about them. And, the fact that she is sentimental and won''t change whatever you give her, don''t you want to be 100% sure that she *wants* whatever that is? You''re getting ready to spend a lot of money on a lifetime gift for her. when hubby and I were dating, we had discussed marriage a bit. One night after a dinner out he just asked me what shape stone I wanted. At the time, it was a round and that was the end of the discussion at that point. He actually ended up proposing without a ring

and then we went shopping and picked out the ring together. I know this isn''t very traditional and many guys wouldn''t go for that at all, so I think at least asking her what shape stone she''d want would be a really great idea.

 

[gwendolyn]

I second mrssalvo! I wear my great-grandmother''s ring on my right hand because it''s a family heirloom, but it isn''t the style I would choose for my engagement ring.

 

[Sparkles22]

Date: 2/21/2008 8:00:32 AM
Author: mrssalvo

Date: 2/21/2008 12:18:18 AM
Author: Gr8fulDave

She is wearing her mother''s two-stone ring (old european-cut round stones that maybe are .6-.7 tcw) as a RHR so that is where I''m getting the notion that she would prefer a RB diamond.

Dave, I really would suggest at least finding out for sure what shape stone she wants. I used to wear an heirloom ring as well and it was special b/c it was an heirloom, not because that''s the shape stone I''d want for my e-ring so i wouldn''t use that as an automatic guess that she''d 100% choose a round. with all the wonderful shapes out there many gals have said they might have choose something different had they even known about them. And, the fact that she is sentimental and won''t change whatever you give her, don''t you want to be 100% sure that she *wants* whatever that is? You''re getting ready to spend a lot of money on a lifetime gift for her. when hubby and I were dating, we had discussed marriage a bit. One night after a dinner out he just asked me what shape stone I wanted. At the time, it was a round and that was the end of the discussion at that point. He actually ended up proposing without a ring

and then we went shopping and picked out the ring together. I know this isn''t very traditional and many guys wouldn''t go for that at all, so I think at least asking her what shape stone she''d want would be a really great idea.

I think this is a great point since while I

my princess e-ring, and wouldn''t want any other shape. I would wear other shapes like RB for other things, especially if she is sentimential, it could just be that, not so much the shape she likes. If the fact you are eventually going to ask her to marry you isn''t a big surprise you can ask random questions about what she likes. Like ask her more about the ring she wears, like "your mom''s ring is really pretty, what do you think of the stone shape? or Is that what you would have picked out for a RHR? or Do you guys have similar taste in jewelry?" or you can always just flat out ask or go ring shopping together. If you want her to have a ring at the time of the proposal you can go ring shopping together beforehand, or propose with a cheap fake one and take her to a jewelry store

 

[cwj]

I agree with everybody! I also wear my grandmothers ring, and I can promise u its not because of the size of the diamond. I always want more size, as long as the stone is eyeclean to me and I like the color. I know u can shop around and find great looking H and I color that look great! I had a 2.50 rd I Sl1 that was prefect to me. It was stolen and now I have a 2.02. If I had the choice I would chose the 2.5. And the fun part of both purchases was we shopped together. I''m more the bargain hurter and it eased my mind to know I looked and found the most for our money! Maybe find a cracker jack ring for fun and give her that when u pop the question, have several rings picked out and take her right then (after u get the yes) and start your shopping, make a whole day of nothing but shopping. It will be fun for u both and a day she will never forget!
cwj

 

[jaguarnation]

sounds like folks are giving you some excellent advice. i would have to add one thing, and i am 1000% sure it has to do with my upbringing. i am from the south, where bigger is better. do i really need to drive my 300 HP V8 truck that I only occassionally use for hauling stuff?: answer -- NO, but it sure looks cool to be in my ''big black beast''. do i really need a 3700 sq ft house as a bachelor?: answer -- NO, but i can''t imagine being in anything smaller. (on second thought, maybe i am claustraphobic!)

all jokes aside, i just had to make a decision about buying a larger diamond 1.5 ct or a 1.2 ct round brilliant. in the end, i selected the 1.2 ct, but that is because it was clearly of a higher quality (color, clarity, and cut)! that being said, if i were me (and I am), i would err on the side of the bling-bling in the case of a 0.8 vt vs 1.0 ct. we all have heard women say size does not matter, but with diamonds (just like other things), it may matter more than someone is willing to admit! (women of PS, do not be offended. the statement i made should not bother you at all, unless you resemble that remark!)

(i sure hope i did not just get myself banned from any more assistance!!)

 

[elle_chris]

When my husband and I got engaged, I didn''t even get an engagement ring!! To be honest, I didn''t care because I was too happy that the guy I adored wanted to marry me.
The first ring came about 2 years after we were married due to a few promotions and large bonuses as that was "fun" money.
I know that diamond "shrinkage" is an ongoing theme on this board but in the real world, it mostly never happens so there''s nothing wrong with saving a few grand and going with the smaller stone provided it''s a beauty.
I am POSITIVE that your girl is going to be beyond happy no matter what you choose because the ring comes in a faaaaaar second to the proposal.

 

[lisa1.01fvs1]

Date: 2/21/2008 10:05:03 AM
Author: jaguarnation
sounds like folks are giving you some excellent advice. i would have to add one thing, and i am 1000% sure it has to do with my upbringing. i am from the south, where bigger is better. do i really need to drive my 300 HP V8 truck that I only occassionally use for hauling stuff?: answer -- NO, but it sure looks cool to be in my ''big black beast''. do i really need a 3700 sq ft house as a bachelor?: answer -- NO, but i can''t imagine being in anything smaller. (on second thought, maybe i am claustraphobic!)

all jokes aside, i just had to make a decision about buying a larger diamond 1.5 ct or a 1.2 ct round brilliant. in the end, i selected the 1.2 ct, but that is because it was clearly of a higher quality (color, clarity, and cut)! that being said, if i were me (and I am), i would err on the side of the bling-bling in the case of a 0.8 vt vs 1.0 ct. we all have heard women say size does not matter, but with diamonds (just like other things), it may matter more than someone is willing to admit! (women of PS, do not be offended. the statement i made should not bother you at all, unless you resemble that remark!)

(i sure hope i did not just get myself banned from any more assistance!!)

You sure got me laughing this morning

.

I guess diamonds and other things do relate in the size department - heeheehee (no offense Dave if this doesn''t positively relate to you

)

No ban for you!

 

[vslover]

As far as diamond shrinkage never happening in the real world, I kinda think that''s true. I really don''t know anyone IRL who has upgraded like I have. Makes me feel a little guilty to be honest. If people stay away from this site, they''ll be happy with whatever!!

 

[ImpatientOne]

Date: 2/21/2008 11:49:15 AM
Author: vslover
As far as diamond shrinkage never happening in the real world, I kinda think that''s true. I really don''t know anyone IRL who has upgraded like I have. Makes me feel a little guilty to be honest. If people stay away from this site, they''ll be happy with whatever!!

LOL, I so agree!

 

[niceice]

Date: 2/20/2008 4:00:37 PM
Author:Gr8fulDave
with a .81 H&A RB G VS2 from GOG versus a 1.0 H&A RB G SI1. I''m having a hard time justifying paying $2000 more for .19 of a carat. Is the 1 carat mark a mystical benchmark below which no man should go?

For the record, she is not materialistic and it will be her first marriage. And yes, I know that the answer to this question will probably be ''it depends on the person.''

I suppose it depends on the lady and her personal preferences in terms of the internal clarity of the diamond. I''m assuming that both diamonds are of comparable cut quality and thus the primary difference is going to be a little bit of size and the degree to which the inclusions within the diamond are visible through a loupe. I''ve sat down with many women who feel that a 3/4 carat diamond is too big for their preference and others who seem to think that nothing short of two carats will do (?)

 

[jaguarnation]

Glad I could make you laugh...