Why update your ring/setting?

[Diamonds make me happy!]

You go Stardust. Pack it up! Seriously though, it makes perfectly good sense! Good luck!

 

[KristyDarling]

Eric -- yours is a good question, since it's shared by a lot of men.

To me, my e-ring is just a *symbol* of my marriage. The fact that I wear a ring on my left hand ring finger means I'm married. The most important thing is that I have a ring on that finger at all times to signify to the world that I'm married. To me, jewelry is just jewelry. Jewelry is just *fashion.* However, for some women, the sentimentality of forever wearing the ring that they were married in *supersedes* whether or not their ring is still "in fashion." Other women are not as sentimental and are totally fine with modifying their ring according to their changing tastes. Everyone's different and handles this in their own way.

I, personally, couldn't bear to part with my original wedding set...even though the diamond is of very crappy quality. So I still have it and wear it with love. However, I also have a "second wedding set" that hubby and I bought during our marriage, when were financially comfortable enough to afford a nicer diamond. I feel very lucky to have the option of both keeping my original set and having a blingier set to wear when I feel like it. And fortunately, my husband was totally on board with it.

 

[gwendolyn]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:22:26 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
I still don't see the comparison between cars, tv's shoes, etc. to an ering. A car or tv has no meaning at all. It's like comparing apples to oranges in my opinion. That is somewhat my point. I think people are losing site on what marrage/rings mean. Of course the fact that the divorce rate is over 50% maybe an indication that people care more about huge diamonds than the actual marriage.

I think that, to some people, the rings are just material things, and that what's important (their relationships) isn't affected by the size or quality of the stones on their fingers. To you and to me, this isn't the case since we are attached to the rings themselves too, but to some people, they don't attach the same sentimental value to the items themselves, just to the people to whom those items represent to us. And if that works for them, then I see absolutely nothing wrong with it.

 

[mrdisco99]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:13:06 PM
Author: Diamonds make me happy!
I can't help but notice it's the men that have a problem with this. I see nothing wrong with upgrading & I have friends that have upgraded or are about to upgrade their diamond. It's not unheard of outside Pricescope. Some people aren't in the position early on to afford what they know their partner would really like. So, whats the problem with upgrading once your financially able to? If I win the lottery tomorrow I can promise I will not still be wearing my 1 ct. ring on my finger. It will be a 3 ct. honker of a ring. I also know that my husband would trade in his modest toyota for a Ferrari! Diamonds are whats important to me & cars are whats important to him but we both know we love each other & thats whats important.

It's not just us guys. My fiancee along with some of the ladies in this thread feel the same way about it.

I see a big difference between upgrading a car and upgrading an engagement ring. To us the ring is a symbol, and has value beyond carats. It's a reminder of our promise.

Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Still, I have trouble understanding how so many people seem to be more concerned about how well their rings reflect their wealth and status rather than the persistence of the relationship. To me the latter seems more important. Some people just don't see it that way, though.

 

[KristyDarling]

Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Still, I find it troubling how so many people seem to be more concerned about how well their rings reflect their wealth and status. Shouldn't it more importantly be a symbol of the persistence of the relationship?

For most people, me included, my ring has nothing to do with wealth and status. It's an aesthetic....nothing more. Some people prefer the look of dainty diamonds, others like medium-sized gems, and still others prefer the look of larger diamonds. Most of the time, I think it's Other People (society in general) that attach connotations such as wealth and status to the size of a diamond.

 

[sera]

My FF and I have already discussed this... he is fine with an upgrade to a bigger/better diamond (and would probably be ok with altering it because it sits too high or something like that), but he is not ok with changing the setting (even though I''m the one picking the setting out). This is probably why I''m having such a difficult time choosing... because this has got to be a style I don''t get tired of (and one of the reasons I am willing to put a significant portion of the budget into a setting by Leon Mege or Ritani).

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:22:26 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
I still don't see the comparison between cars, tv's shoes, etc. to an ering. A car or tv has no meaning at all.

*I* compared it to HOUSES. You think your first HOME won't be a big deal? Full of heart & soul & memories etc ... but you don't live there forever. At least most people these days don't.

I think people are losing site on what marrage/rings mean. Of course the fact that the divorce rate is over 50% maybe an indication that people care more about huge diamonds than the actual marriage.

Yes. You're so onto us. We ladies are only in it for the jewelry.

Maybe if you'd try *absorbing* what the ladies HERE are saying you'd realize its the MARRIAGES they're happy with (some for 30+ years)! They've been together so long STYLES HAVE CHANGED or their RINGS HAVE WORN OUT. You should HOPE for such good fortune rather than whine & stress about how what you're choosing now might be out of date in several DECADES.

Oh, and Tacori ... quality. control. problems. (Search bar + "Tacori" for all the details) And did you know Tacori is now doing a shopping channel "fashion line"? Goes to show you -- things change. Rings are just symbols. It's the love/committment/thought that counts.

 

[mrdisco99]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:22:26 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
I still don''t see the comparison between cars, tv''s shoes, etc. to an ering. A car or tv has no meaning at all. It''s like comparing apples to oranges in my opinion. That is somewhat my point. I think people are losing site on what marrage/rings mean. Of course the fact that the divorce rate is over 50% maybe an indication that people care more about huge diamonds than the actual marriage.

I wouldn''t go so far as to say that upgraders have less value attached to their marriage. I just think that some of us attach a different meaning to our rings. Some people don''t see their rings as a reflection of their relationship, but rather just a sign to show the world they''re married. The fact that it''s made of pretty diamonds is a bonus. Whereas some of us attach more of a symbolic meaning to it and are more sentimental.

Doesn''t make either of us right or wrong or more or less respectful of our marriage. We just see things differently.

 

[Stone Hunter]

Date: 8/14/2007 11:56:58 AM
Author: mrdisco99
Maybe I''m the minority, but I kinda agree with the original post. I put a lot of time and energy into picking out something for my fiancee that will be forever... something that looks beautiful and timeless, reflects both our styles, and that decades from now we will still look at fondly and be reminded of how things were when we started... and maybe even pass down to our grandchildren.

To me, diamonds are the ultimate physical symbol of timelessness. They''re all millions of years old and are the most durable things on earth, so they''ll be around for millions more. That''s why diamonds are such a great symbol for lasting love. I''m giving her a diamond not just because it''s pretty, but because it''s a symbol of our love and it''s supposed to be forever.

Getting it upgraded or replaced a few years later just seems pointless. Why go through all the trouble (and money!) of getting a diamond if she''s expected to get tired of it and want a bigger one in 10 years?

Heck, I know a girl who''s only had her ring a few months and is already looking for an upgrade. All that says to me is that she thinks the guy screwed up the first time.

I''m not saying my wife-to-be shouldn''t have more later when we''re better off and can look back on years of happy marriage. I''d be happy to get her something to celebrate that... but it should be something new. To me the original engagement ring has meaning and should stay.


Let me end my rant by saying I realize a lot of you see things differently. It''s your relationship and your jewelry and I''m not judging. I''m just saying what feels right for mine.

I see where you are coming from. BUT you are already putting more time and effort into this than most men did 30 or 15 years ago. The people you see with upgrades are from a time when people didn''t put as much thought into the diamond and setting BEFORE buying it as they do now.

I have a friend in her late 60''s who has upgraded. She HATED her first set. Her DH never asked her what she would like and picked something totally not her personality. Eventually she changed it, and he does know why and they are happily married for more than 30 years.

And of course some people are updating due to updated financial status. Others never do.

 

[Mr. Eric]

I don'' t ever remember attacking anyone on this site.?

 

[mimzy]

this is just speculation, but i think that it depends on your, ahem, lifestyle whether you upgrade or not. for some people, the size of their diamonds is really a status symbol - thus as their financial status rises, so does the carat weight and they make it a point to keep the two proportional. most middle-class people would never think to save to upgrade their rings (unless it was seriously damaged) because there are usually family vacations or a mortgage that are higher on the priority list. also i think that most women would prefer to have several modest pieces of jewelry instead of one gigantic engagement ring and nothing else.

i would personally never want to trade in my engagement diamond for a bigger or "better" one, especially after knowing how much time and effort my boyfriend put into picking it out. It might not be gigantic by PS standards, but it certainly isn''t anything to be embarrassed about about and i know he is proud of it. knowing that i will always have the one thing that we started out with is more important than a few extra millimeters. It will always impress me, regardless of if it always impresses my friends (not that that is the only reason why people upgrade). it''s sort of like how i would never trade in my favorite autographed concert tshirt - even though it is stained and old i would never get rid of it for another newer one because of the sentimental value that is attached to getting the autograph.i know it is a cheesy analogy, but it makes sense to me...

if later on in our lives he decided that he wanted me to have something more flashy then i would encourage him to buy something completely different, like a pendant to match or something.

 

[Stone Hunter]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:24:01 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
Startdust you have a valid reason for an upgrade. I think the fact that your ring is about to fall apart is a good reason to get a new setting!

Oh yeah. I forgot that my MIL got a new setting maybe 18 years ago for this reason. We took her old setting and had it melted down with other family rings and it''s in our wedding rings. See an "upgrade" can be very meaningful.

 

[Diamonds make me happy!]

You didn''t attack but you implied that if you upgrade your wedding rings you don''t take your vows seriously & you''ll end in divorce, etc, etc. You''re going to get some reactions when you say things like that. I take my wedding vows VERY seriously. I love my husband, I love my rings but if I get the chance to upgrade then I will! I don''t look down on anyone who has done so, or who would choose NOT to.

 

[Eva17]

It is very cute that you are felling sentimental about the ring. After all you aren''t even engaged yet. If you don''t feel it now, then when would you.... Good luck, by the way.


Come back in 20 years. After 27 years, the ring is no longer a huge symbol of our marriage. Children, home, business, vacations, all the wonderful memories created along the way are what create the marriage bond.

Slipping on that ring, it is a distant memory. A good one, but still a distant one!

 

[MoonWater]

Great thread. I can see both points of view to an extent. I''m pretty sentimental and always assumed I would wear my engagement/wedding ring for the rest of my life. So I searched for a ring with this in mind. I searched and searched and decided I hated all engagement rings. I finally found the Ritani endless love halo solitaire and fell for that. It''s new but the design is vintage. I spent a year on Fay Cullen drooling over those rings, so I realized Edwardian/Art Deco/time between the two have rings that I really like. The problem is that the Ritani ring with the center carat size I want is out of my bf''s price range. But I offered to pay half or more because I thought no price is too much if I have to wear it for the rest of my life. It was one of few rings I saw that I actually liked and the ONLY ring I liked on my finger!!!

Enter pricescope. I swear you guys can give people diamond/ring/jewelry fever! I had never heard of an upgrade before I got here. I still can not imagine upgrading. I wouldn''t mind an anniversary ring for my right hand in the future, but a completely new set doesn''t sit well with me. But then, I read and read and read and wonder...if my marriage lasts long enough, how do I know I won''t hate halos in the future? Then I read the yellow gold vs white metal thread and freaked out about hating platinum in the future (okay this is unlikely, i wore gold for a brief period but ultimately fell for silver and white gold and now platinum). But I think once I''m engaged/married I may have to stop coming to pricescope just to avoid the urge to upgrade!!

Ultimately, I don''t have a problem with it, to each his own. Esp for couples who, when starting out, couldn''t afford what they really wanted. Why not upgrade later? I can also understand why a woman who has been married 25+ years would want a new set, it really is only jewelry. Although I must say, upgrading after a few months, a year, or only 5 years seems a bit absurd and greedy, but hey, if the couple wants it so be it. There is no reason to question why you put the effort into searching for the perfect ring for your gal. I think guys should always put a lot of effort into buying gifts, it''s just a nice thing to do dammit! That is not time, money, or effort wasted. The ring will always have its sentimental value and no one can ever take that away (even if the ring is stuck in a dark box somewhere

)

 

[Maisie]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:22:26 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
I still don''t see the comparison between cars, tv''s shoes, etc. to an ering. A car or tv has no meaning at all. It''s like comparing apples to oranges in my opinion. That is somewhat my point. I think people are losing site on what marrage/rings mean. Of course the fact that the divorce rate is over 50% maybe an indication that people care more about huge diamonds than the actual marriage.

If you had read the replies properly you would see that the majority of upgraders here are people who have been happily married for 25+ years and are celebrating by buying new jewellery!

 

[Stone Hunter]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:45:32 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
I don'' t ever remember attacking anyone on this site.?

I hope you don''t mean my post!? I bolded the part about you putting more effort into this ''cause i think you ARE putting alot of effort into this. And I think that''s a GOOD thing. You are thinking ahead!!

You will avoid some of the problems that people in the past have had...that''s all I meant.

 

[lyra]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:43:34 PM
Author: mrdisco99

I wouldn''t go so far as to say that upgraders have less value attached to their marriage. I just think that some of us attach a different meaning to our rings. Some people don''t see their rings as a reflection of their relationship, but rather just a sign to show the world they''re married. The fact that it''s made of pretty diamonds is a bonus. Whereas some of us attach more of a symbolic meaning to it and are more sentimental.

Doesn''t make either of us right or wrong or more or less respectful of our marriage. We just see things differently.

I think it also depends which end of the relationship you''re viewing this issue from. We''re 25 years down the road. So much has changed in our lives. Our outlooks have changed. Our relationship itself has changed and evolved in a good way. Plus, although we don''t know it at the time, sometimes we make poor choices in our original e-ring purchase. I found that my e-ring (.25ct) was set so high I couldn''t wear it around the house much. When we had kids, it was out of the question. One scratched cheek, and that was it. So at 5 years, we had it reset into a more child/house-friendly setting which I wore for the next 10 years straight. By then it was a soldered together 3 ring set, but it was too small, and I couldn''t have it resized again or else I''d have to just get new shanks put on. So we bought a bezel set 5 stone anniversary ring (1 stone for every 3 years) that could withstand anything inside or outside the home and never leaves my finger.

For my actual big upgrade, it''s more my husband''s idea because that''s what his peers have done or are doing, our finances have improved, and for sentimental reasons, it just makes sense. The 25 year road was filled with 10 years straight of hardships that are thankfully behind us now. It''s a reminder and token that we have made it through thick and thin (all those things mentioned in our wedding vows), and have come out the other side. At least for now.

BTW, my husband actually made his first wedding ring himself. He was an amateur jeweller when he was young. He didn''t want to have the ring resized because it would ruin the design, so that''s why he got a new ring at 15 years. We have 2 daughters who will inherit all these pieces, and that is also part of the process. It''s all perspective I guess.

 

[Sundial]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:40:41 PM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 8/14/2007 4:22:26 PM
Author: Mr. Eric
I still don''t see the comparison between cars, tv''s shoes, etc. to an ering. A car or tv has no meaning at all.

*I* compared it to HOUSES. You think your first HOME won''t be a big deal? Full of heart & soul & memories etc ... but you don''t live there forever. At least most people these days don''t.

I think people are losing site on what marrage/rings mean. Of course the fact that the divorce rate is over 50% maybe an indication that people care more about huge diamonds than the actual marriage.

Yes. You''re so onto us. We ladies are only in it for the jewelry.

Maybe if you''d try *absorbing* what the ladies HERE are saying you''d realize its the MARRIAGES they''re happy with (some for 30+ years)! They''ve been together so long STYLES HAVE CHANGED or their RINGS HAVE WORN OUT. You should HOPE for such good fortune rather than whine & stress about how what you''re choosing now might be out of date in several DECADES.

Oh, and Tacori ... quality. control. problems. (Search bar + ''Tacori'' for all the details) And did you know Tacori is now doing a shopping channel ''fashion line''? Goes to show you -- things change. Rings are just symbols. It''s the love/committment/thought that counts.

Well said Deco!!! I''ve been happily married for 30 years and I hardly think my making modest upgrades to the size of my diamond or the setting of my ring really dimishes the value of my relationship with my husband. All I can say Mr. Eric is that you are young and in my opinion you seem to be placing way too much emphasis on what is only a piece of jewelry when all is said and done.

 

[Mr. Eric]

I just thought that this would be a fun topic to discuss. I am sure that I worded somethings poorly. Too each their own. People have different views on things and that is fine. Whether or not you upgrade your rings does not effect me in any way. So I apologize if anything that I said sounded mean or what not. If a ring was just a ring I don''t think that this site would even exist and we would all be wearing silver bands with no rocks. From now on I am just going to ask specific question on stones and what not. Everyone have a great day!

 

[KristyDarling]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:54:04 PM
Author: MoonWater
There is no reason to question why you put the effort into searching for the perfect ring for your gal. I think guys should always put a lot of effort into buying gifts, it''s just a nice thing to do dammit! That is not time, money, or effort wasted. The ring will always have its sentimental value and no one can ever take that away (even if the ring is stuck in a dark box somewhere

)

This is such a good point!

 

[MoonWater]

Date: 8/14/2007 5:07:38 PM
Author: KristyDarling

Date: 8/14/2007 4:54:04 PM
Author: MoonWater
There is no reason to question why you put the effort into searching for the perfect ring for your gal. I think guys should always put a lot of effort into buying gifts, it''s just a nice thing to do dammit! That is not time, money, or effort wasted. The ring will always have its sentimental value and no one can ever take that away (even if the ring is stuck in a dark box somewhere

)

This is such a good point!

It''s funny, I am totally the type to save every note that my bf writes to me. I save ticket stubs to things like Spiderman for crying outloud (okay I started throwing that type of stuff out, but our first movie ticket, still have it!). So i completely understand the sentimental side of this argument. I just don''t understand why one would think the sentiment is gone simply because the piece is no longer worn or not worn as often (since some women still pull out their old jewelry). Heck my bf''s mom just pulled out an old niiiice ring she hated when she was younger (gorgeous, but was old fashion to her, it''s vintage now haha) and when I noticed her new bling, I asked about her wedding band and found out IT''S NOT HER ORIGINAL BAND!! The original was just a plain gold band that she simply doesn''t wear anymore. They just celebrated 40 years together!!!! Obviously the jewelry is not the most important thing.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:34:38 PM
Author: mrdisco99


It's not just us guys. My fiancee along with some of the ladies in this thread feel the same way about it.

I see a big difference between upgrading a car and upgrading an engagement ring. To us the ring is a symbol, and has value beyond carats. It's a reminder of our promise.

Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Still, I have trouble understanding how so many people seem to be more concerned about how well their rings reflect their wealth and status rather than the persistence of the relationship. To me the latter seems more important. Some people just don't see it that way, though.

I seriously doubt most, if any of us are after that with our upgrades. We simply want a bigger/better stone/setting.

IF my hubby could have afforded a 1 ct. stone when we got engaged, I couldn't have worn it. I was not (and to a certain extent, still am not) into size. I also live in the midwest, where things are a bit more modest. As it was, my husband could afford very little at the time. I wore that ring, as I said, for 25 years. But yanno, my eyes aren't quite what they used to be, and I wanted a stone I could actually see with ease.

So I bought just under a 1.5. I could have gotten bigger, but I really don't want to draw attention to it/myself, and it had nothing to do with trying to make a social/wealth status statement.

I simply got a nice sized ring, because I wanted it, and after going without a lot in life, I felt I deserved it. And it's not like I threw my old set away....


Oh, and to address the "persistance of the relationship"? I'm still with him, THAT is the reflection of the persistance.

 

[Vix]

My sister and her husband just had their 2nd anniversary, and while they were visiting the other week I cough *enabled* cough watched her spontaneously trade in her engagement ring for another -- and IMO now they have a more romantic tale to tell!

The original was a 3-stone that she''d picked out herself at one of the chain stores. As she says, "It fit our budget and was the best I''d seen at that level; I was sick of looking and just wanted to be ''officially'' engaged, so [Husband] came in and bought it for me."

Just for fun, I took her into one of the antique jewelry stores I like, and she ended up falling in love with a [much nicer] old cut diamond about the same size as her center stone. However, unlike what she came in with, the shop''s setting looked stunning on her hand/with her wedding band. The jeweler was willing to sell it to her in exchange for her ring and several hundred dollars; naturally enough, her husband thought that was a bit silly given that their "fun fund" could use replenishment. She reluctantly handed it back while I stayed chatting and they hit the pub.

Cue her running back in to get it ten minutes later, saying my BIL could see how happy the "new" old ring had made her...So now she has a more fabulous, more unique, more flattering-on-her-finger ring acquired on a trip with her beloved -- I''d say that''s the best kind of "upgrade"!

 

[Miranda]

Oh lordy!!! I don't know how these types of threads get soooo heated soooo quickly! Sometimes there is a breakdown of respecting other people's viewpoints methinks!

Here's the bottom line Mr. Eric. Some of us are sentimental and 'symbolic' and some of us are not.

I am not sentimental or symbolic so I cannot comment on how those that are may feel. I can, however, tell you how I feel. *To me* the idea that a ring could be a symbol of the love and commitment my hubby and I share is silly. I cannot, for the life of me, understand that thinking. Just like you can't understand how someone would upgrade or change settings. It's the same level of disbelief. Many men feel the way you do...Or just use it as an excuse not to buy more jewelry

 

[luckystar112]

Mr. Eric-- Sorry some people on this site feel like they have to attack people for not understanding what they are saying right away.

I think you have an extremely VALID question....and a point when it comes to the divorce rate too! I remember reading an article about upgrades and divorces, but I can't find the exact article now. However, I did find this article from 2003 that sort of touches on the subject:
http://www.familylawsoftware.com/newsreport/03-02-06_WSJ.htm

from the article:

Among the most telling questions Would you ever consider trading in your engagement ring for a bigger, better diamond? In a 1988 poll of 200 new brides by Diamond Cutters International, 46% said yes and 54% said no.

Now, 15 years later, these women have been polled again. Of those who in 1988 were willing to trade up their diamonds, 81% are now divorced. Of the sentimental types who said they'd never trade their rings, 78% remain married today. The results suggest that people who are "hard-wired" to upgrade rings also may be driven to upgrade cars, houses and eventually, spouses, says psychiatrist Francisco Montalvo, who monitored the study.

Granted, there are SO many other variables that should be included in that poll....but I thought it was interesting nonetheless.
ETA: And most of the women who get upgrades on this site have already made it past the 15 year mark!

As for me, I am one of those sentimental types. I've had my ring for six days now and I couldn't imagine trading it in for a new diamond. With that being said, I could see myself going bigger in the next 5-10 years. I just don't know if I would have the heart to totally get rid of my original stone. Maybe a pendant or something?
The setting itself isn't as sentimental to me (although I do L

VE it.) Metal is metal is metal. It breaks.
But the one thing that I absolutely could NOT upgrade ever.....is the wedding BAND. I feel like that means "more". So I better get the one I want the first time! If I get an eternity band or something and it ends up out of date, I would probably take out the stones and make it into something more modern and fabulous down the road.

 

[cutey TT]

I think that different people have different reasons for updating their rings... For example, I re-set my original e-ring stone in a new setting last year. My original setting (now in hindsight) was not the most secure, nor did it showcase my stone very well. To make a long story short, my stone became dangerously loose in its original home and since it was a tension setting, the jeweler from whom we bought it said that I would need to pay almost half of what we originally paid for it to get it fixed properly by the manufacturer. For a while, I did not wear my e-ring at all, for fear of losing the center stone, but eventually decided that I was going to select a different setting to re-set it in. At this point, I came to know PS, and was introduced to whole new world of beautiful settings and picked the Ritani Endless Love.

Do I love my new setting? Absolutely. Does it mean any less to me because it looks completely different now? No, I love it more. And of course my husband is happy cuz I''m happy and prefers that I wear the ring, versus leaving it in a jewelry box at home.

In a similar but different tale, DH also had to replace his ring once so far. The original platinum band that we exchanged on our wedding day was lost while swimming in Cancun. There I was, 4 months pregnant with our first child, and I got caught in a riptide (I''m a pretty good swimmer normally). He was rushing over to me, and unbeknownst to him, his ring slipped off. We didn''t realize until shortly after when we were in the hotel pool and I asked him if he had taken his ring off and left it in the safe (since it was unusual for him not to be wearing it). We ended up replacing his with a WG version of the original (thinking he may lose it again...haha) and so far, we''re still good.

In the same way, I don''t think the fact that he doesn''t have his original-original wedding band means any less to him (or me). Maybe we''re not as sentimental, but the ring is a *symbol* of our love / marriage. Replacing / Updating / Upgrading the symbol doesn''t change what it symbolizes, if that makes sense.

 

[lyra]

Date: 8/14/2007 4:53:31 PM
Author: Eva17

Slipping on that ring, it is a distant memory. A good one, but still a distant one!

Thanks for reminding me about that.

I''ll never in my life forget the magic of that one moment. It really was the first *best* moment of my life. Material possessions come and go, but the sentiment of that particular moment never dies, in my opinion.

I don''t think it''s ever a good idea to put too much importance on *any* material item. Any of those things can be lost, stolen, or otherwise taken away in life due to unforseen circumstances. (been there, done that) Rings are just a symbol of something when all is said and done. They don''t make or break it really.

 

[diamondringlover]

OK, this is my personal opinion, I agree that your original set has alot of sentimental value, however, back when I first got married money was very tight and my ering was a slender band of rubies and diamonds, the stones were very small, back in the 80''s and prior diamonds were very expensive and we couldnt afford the beautiful diamonds that are out there today, so when we got older and money was more available we can upgrade to a more a bigger and beautiful set. Today it seems like alot of people are going out on a limb and puttng alot of money into the initial set, I think if you can afford it go for it..I dont think I would have ever changed had I been able to afford what I wanted in the beginning. Some of the rings I have seen on this site are just amazing, heck, they are better then what I upgraded to after 20 years of marriage.

 

[somethingshiny]

My .02. I got engaged very young. I was married at 19. A pear shaped diamond with a wrap in 14KY. My tastes have significantly changed and matured over the last few years. I no longer find my wedding set THE most beautiful. When I look at my wedding ring, I want to feel that way. Also, some women upgrade their rings after having marital difficulties. Kind of like starting anew. And, I am about to order my husband''s new ring. He has also had a yellow gold ring which he no longer loves. He''s looking into a tungsten carbide ring for extra durability as well as different styles.

When I was first engaged/married, I never thought I would want a different ring. So, I understand your sentiments on the subject. There may come a day, though, that you or she wants something different. I hope you won''t take that as a personal attack. I assure you that is not what an upgrade is about.

Good Luck!