When do you say enough is enough when trying to lose weight?

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/12/2007 9:46:40 AM
Author: Maria D
Wow IslandDreams, I sincerely hope you''re not really ''ashamed!'' I can workout 5 times a week because I have only one child (who is 13 and more independent than younger ones would be) and work only part-time. I can''t imagine how it would be possible working full time with younger children. You certainly shouldn''t compare yourself with people here who are childfree (or ''jobfree'') and can carve out time for themselves whenever they want. You should be proud for everything that you do!

DItto what she said. I am so lucky to be able to get up and exercise on whatever mornings I so choose. But perhaps making a family date twice a week to go for a walk would be a good place to start.

Thanks for the advice, gail! It''s sound and sensible. I''ve started calorie counted, which has actually helped, and it''s made me eat more often throughout the day. I''ve started having small snacks like almonds etc. and it''s been great for me. I''ve actually lost a few lbs. over the last couple of weeks.

 

[mrchips]

Date: 12/27/2006 10:58:05 PM
Author:KimberlyH
About 5 years ago I shed 68 lbs. I quit smoking and gained 5 of them back, plus a clothing size. I exercise 4-5 times a week burning about 500 cals a pop and eat a healthy, well balanced diet (about 1500 calories a day) but I forever find myself frustrated and wanting to be one clothing size smaller (the seemingly elusive size 6) even though I am curvy and fit quite well into my current wardrobe and am often told I look healthy and fit.


At what point do you just say enough is enough and stop fixating on the number on a tag? I know I am healthy and take good care of my body but I always want more. I managed my all-time low weight for about 4 months while smoking, which is known to increase your metabolism, but it was really difficult and on a very limited caloric intake (about 1000 calories a day).


So when do you say, enough is enough? When is how you look in the mirror good enough? I am really struggling with my desire to see the number I want on a tag that no one else will and knowing that I''m just fine being who I am where I am. I am considering going on another extremely low cal diet to lose the weight but then I contemplate how long I''ll have to eat that way to stay a certain size and is that size worth it?

i''m a male. and i''ll say this. sometimes its never enough. i can never be ripped enough, or never have enough muslce or this and that. these thoughts go through everyone''s head.

but i have this to remember.

the scale only produces a number. its what''s inside that matters most.

your question was when enough is enough?

my answer: WHEN YOU''RE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF BOTH INSIDE AND OUT that is when enough is enough. don''t let anyone stand in your way of all your hard work and dedication. its not just a fad eating right and losing weight. its a lifestyle change.

CONGRATS ON LOSING ALL THE WEIGHT.

don''t worry about those five pounds. that''s nothing. remember, and those will be properly or evenly distrubeted to where it is needed most. muscle weighs more than fat.

as far as calorie counting goes, as long as you''re eating nice and clean you should have no reason to count calories.

BEST OF LUCK!!!

 

[Mara]

i dunno, i am a huge fan of calorie counting because many times portions are an issue. so eating 'clean' or whatever doesn't always do it. sometimes's its more about awareness. and for me i have counted calories for a while now so i automatically know what i am eating and what portions are the right size. i think that everyone has what works for them and that's fabulous. to me calorie counting gets a bad rap because it's associated with 'dieting' or old fad diets but it's not an extreme thing for me at all. it just helps me mentally to know that i am 'within my range'. maybe one day i won't have to actually count, i'll just know but in the meantime the spreadsheet with it's rows of numbers is comforting, lol. i have a very analytical number crunching aspect to my job as well so i also have an ease with numbers and associating them to other things. so it just works for me.

ID...my other thought is what about your lunch hour? take your walking shoes and go for a 30 minute walk at lunch. i have been contemplating doing this and adding it to my regime because i typically just work through lunch and it makes the day go longer about 3pm. if i could just get out for even 15 minutes, not so much for the exercise aspect, just to take a breather, it would probably do me good.

the other thing i want to say is that i firmly believe that if you really want to find the time in a schedule, you can. i know you have kids and work, but i would try to pull your hubby in to help you so that you CAN have 30 minutes or an hour a day to yourself. it is really not that much to ask. greg and i are kind of trying to work that out right now also because i do not want to have a child and then realize that the burden is totally on me and i will have no time for myself. there are two of us here and i want us to take a very equal share in all the responsibilities of family or household or whatever. just my thoughts...not sure what your day is like but for me working out is a priority that i refuse to give up. good luck regardless and you know you can always post in the WWT...we also talk a lot about food and recipes too!

 

[eks6426]

Walking at lunch is a good idea...as in a family walk....when the weather gets better. I live in the north and it is definitely not motivating to walk when it is rain/sleet/snowing or the wind is blowing really hard. In summer, those would work to some extent. I usually do errands at lunch...i.e. grocery shopping for the week etc. Is a walk in my work clothes where I don''t work up a sweat going to do much good?

Mara--you''re right that I should be able to find that 1/2 hour...mine would start at about 10pm and when I try to exercise at 10pm I don''t sleep. The best option is the AM if I could drag my sorry butt out of bed.

My husband is very helpful when he''s home and not bringing work home. I''m very lucky there..he''s a guy who actually cleans on his own without me asking. It''s just that he is home late with more to do once he gets home. Hopefully that will change.

I''m good with the recipes so I can contribute there on the WWT threads

 

[mrchips]

Date: 1/12/2007 11:29:23 AM
Author: Mara
i dunno, i am a huge fan of calorie counting because many times portions are an issue. so eating ''clean'' or whatever doesn''t always do it. sometimes''s its more about awareness. and for me i have counted calories for a while now so i automatically know what i am eating and what portions are the right size. i think that everyone has what works for them and that''s fabulous. to me calorie counting gets a bad rap because it''s associated with ''dieting'' or old fad diets but it''s not an extreme thing for me at all. it just helps me mentally to know that i am ''within my range''. maybe one day i won''t have to actually count, i''ll just know but in the meantime the spreadsheet with it''s rows of numbers is comforting, lol. i have a very analytical number crunching aspect to my job as well so i also have an ease with numbers and associating them to other things. so it just works for me.


ID...my other thought is what about your lunch hour? take your walking shoes and go for a 30 minute walk at lunch. i have been contemplating doing this and adding it to my regime because i typically just work through lunch and it makes the day go longer about 3pm. if i could just get out for even 15 minutes, not so much for the exercise aspect, just to take a breather, it would probably do me good.


the other thing i want to say is that i firmly believe that if you really want to find the time in a schedule, you can. i know you have kids and work, but i would try to pull your hubby in to help you so that you CAN have 30 minutes or an hour a day to yourself. it is really not that much to ask. greg and i are kind of trying to work that out right now also because i do not want to have a child and then realize that the burden is totally on me and i will have no time for myself. there are two of us here and i want us to take a very equal share in all the responsibilities of family or household or whatever. just my thoughts...not sure what your day is like but for me working out is a priority that i refuse to give up. good luck regardless and you know you can always post in the WWT...we also talk a lot about food and recipes too!

good points in every paragraph. everyone has what works for them.

i measure out my food as well. 6oz of chicken, 7 oz of Yams, 1 cup veggies etc etc...but now i just automatically know what 6oz is and etc...after a while you get used to it.

i don''t count calories, because if i''m working out and doing my runs like i normally do, putting in clean food, say a protein shake at midnight will do nothing against my body. in fact, it''d only help me (so long as its a slow release protein blend).

eat clean for 6 days and then on the 7th you can have ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING and it will not work against you.

 

[Maria D]

mrchips said: >>WHEN YOU''RE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF BOTH INSIDE AND OUT<<

For me, the motivation to take care of myself, both with good diet and with exercise, comes from being happy with myself. When I''m NOT happy, I want to reach for comfort snack foods or just laze around. It''s a vicious cycle, the worse I feel about myself the worse I''m going to make myself feel about myself. But on the other hand, the better I feel...you get the picture!

There was a thread on how to get motivated a little while ago and I think the trick may lie in mrchips'' line above: be happy with yourself and you WANT to take good care. KimberlyH, it sure sounds like you have every reason to be REALLY REALLY happy with yourself... quitting smoking alone is such a huge triumph. When I was younger, I was so critical of every flaw. Now I focus more on what I can do than on what I look like. I mean, I look fine, but I''ve never had thighs as thin as I wanted or a stomach as flat as I thought it should be. But when I''m at the gym and see that I can still keep up with people 20 years younger than me, I feel pretty good! So I have to make the *decision* to just accept my body and be happy with it.

 

[Maria D]

Date: 1/12/2007 1:55:26 PM
Author: IslandDreams
Is a walk in my work clothes where I don''t work up a sweat going to do much good?

Anything is better than nothing. If you have time during your lunch errands to park further from the door and walk extra steps, it''s something. Studies have even shown that people who fidget burn more calories than those hwo don''t! (Once I tried being fidgety when at my desk and it didn''t work -- I just can''t keep up the fidgeting!)

 

[Mara]

Date: 1/12/2007 3:57:11 PM
Author: Maria D

Date: 1/12/2007 1:55:26 PM
Author: IslandDreams
Is a walk in my work clothes where I don''t work up a sweat going to do much good?

Anything is better than nothing. If you have time during your lunch errands to park further from the door and walk extra steps, it''s something. Studies have even shown that people who fidget burn more calories than those hwo don''t! (Once I tried being fidgety when at my desk and it didn''t work -- I just can''t keep up the fidgeting!)

lol yeah i agree. and i read that article about fidgeting. i am a huge fidgeter so maybe it works to my advantage lol!!

kimberly, even if you don''t build up a sweat, getting out and moving around is awesome for you. we walk to starbucks here from work every day and it''s a 5 min walk there and back. not enough to make me sweat but i love taking the walk 1-2x a day even if i don''t get anything. it helps get me away from my desk and outside for a few minutes. do you have stairs in your building? need a 10 minute break? go up and down a few floors a few times. that will get your blood pumping and raise your heart rate, even if it you don''t ''sweat'' persay.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/12/2007 5:13:02 PM
Author: Mara

Date: 1/12/2007 3:57:11 PM
Author: Maria D

Date: 1/12/2007 1:55:26 PM
Author: IslandDreams
Is a walk in my work clothes where I don''t work up a sweat going to do much good?

Anything is better than nothing. If you have time during your lunch errands to park further from the door and walk extra steps, it''s something. Studies have even shown that people who fidget burn more calories than those hwo don''t! (Once I tried being fidgety when at my desk and it didn''t work -- I just can''t keep up the fidgeting!)

lol yeah i agree. and i read that article about fidgeting. i am a huge fidgeter so maybe it works to my advantage lol!!

kimberly, even if you don''t build up a sweat, getting out and moving around is awesome for you. we walk to starbucks here from work every day and it''s a 5 min walk there and back. not enough to make me sweat but i love taking the walk 1-2x a day even if i don''t get anything. it helps get me away from my desk and outside for a few minutes. do you have stairs in your building? need a 10 minute break? go up and down a few floors a few times. that will get your blood pumping and raise your heart rate, even if it you don''t ''sweat'' persay.

I think you meant to address this it ID, Miss Mara.

 

[Mara]

Date: 1/12/2007 5:49:17 PM
Author: KimberlyH

Date: 1/12/2007 5:13:02 PM
Author: Mara

Date: 1/12/2007 3:57:11 PM
Author: Maria D

Date: 1/12/2007 1:55:26 PM
Author: IslandDreams
Is a walk in my work clothes where I don''t work up a sweat going to do much good?

Anything is better than nothing. If you have time during your lunch errands to park further from the door and walk extra steps, it''s something. Studies have even shown that people who fidget burn more calories than those hwo don''t! (Once I tried being fidgety when at my desk and it didn''t work -- I just can''t keep up the fidgeting!)

lol yeah i agree. and i read that article about fidgeting. i am a huge fidgeter so maybe it works to my advantage lol!!

kimberly, even if you don''t build up a sweat, getting out and moving around is awesome for you. we walk to starbucks here from work every day and it''s a 5 min walk there and back. not enough to make me sweat but i love taking the walk 1-2x a day even if i don''t get anything. it helps get me away from my desk and outside for a few minutes. do you have stairs in your building? need a 10 minute break? go up and down a few floors a few times. that will get your blood pumping and raise your heart rate, even if it you don''t ''sweat'' persay.

I think you meant to address this it ID, Miss Mara.

lol yes i''m a dork. ID!

 

[moremoremore]

You know, i haven't read this whole thread but I skimmed and it's so interesting to me and I hope somewhat on point...As a currently big boned gal

(who is on day 5 of my "lifestyle change" not "diet" so I can get back to where I was when I worked out..which was never THIN but was quite nice and athletic 5'11 amazon princess

) it's so interesting to see people's outlook on food and their body and a struggle for a number or perfect shape...I have to say, it sounds EXHAUSTING.

I'm not saying this sarcastically,but people who obsess about a number and are obsessed with calories should probably get therapy. That follows along with MrChips great advice on being happy inside and out.. I plan on getting therapy for my outlook on food as well...I always laugh a little when I see a nice size 8 wanting to be a 6..a 6 wanting to be a 4 or a 4 wanting to be a 2. I'm really not jealous of those people b/c again, they have no grip on reality and it sounds exhausting..will they EVER be "happy"... and by happy, I mean HAPPY and not just thin which some people equate as equal, which it's not. You probably have a nice figure. Enjoy it and stop worrying so much. Go see someone to discuss your concerns, eat "clean", go work out to stay tones and keep those womanly curves...

 

[Mara]

Date: 1/13/2007 10:57:35 AM
Author: moremoremore
You know, i haven't read this whole thread but I skimmed and it's so interesting to me and I hope somewhat on point...As a currently big boned gal

(who is on day 5 of my 'lifestyle change' not 'diet' so I can get back to where I was when I worked out..which was never THIN but was quite nice and athletic 5'11 amazon princess

) it's so interesting to see people's outlook on food and their body and a struggle for a number or perfect shape...I have to say, it sounds EXHAUSTING.

I'm not saying this sarcastically,but people who obsess about a number and are obsessed with calories should probably get therapy. That follows along with MrChips great advice on being happy inside and out.. I plan on getting therapy for my outlook on food as well...I always laugh a little when I see a nice size 8 wanting to be a 6..a 6 wanting to be a 4 or a 4 wanting to be a 2. I'm really not jealous of those people b/c again, they have no grip on reality and it sounds exhausting..will they EVER be 'happy'... and by happy, I mean HAPPY and not just thin which some people equate as equal, which it's not. You probably have a nice figure. Enjoy it and stop worrying so much. Go see someone to discuss your concerns, eat 'clean', go work out to stay tones and keep those womanly curves...

LOL mmm all i have to say is....talk to me in 9 months. that is, 9 months into your your 'lifestyle change'.

for me, more than anything i love seeing the changes that it all makes visually to my body more than any numbers i see...but the numbers DO help keep me on track. my shoulders are even smaller and i thought i was just wide shouldered! it's amazing what your body can do when you give it the option.

anyway, i have been doing the healthy lifestylething hard core for 9 months and now i am able to give myself a little more leeway and i'm finding it's mentally really hard to kind of change what i have been doing for the last 9 months. it sounds kind of silly to say that it's hard to eat more ice cream or have another muffin or whatever, but it is!!! and quite frankly if you told me 9 months ago 'mara, in 9 months after reaching and surpassing your weight and health goal you will have a hard time eating full-fat ice cream again' i would have laughed in your face. but here i am!!! thinking 'oh slow churned is the way to go!'.

in a way i have to re-learn my 'lifestyle' change again because i like working out and i want to keep doing that part of it, so if that is the case, then i have to actually eat more than i have been to stay where i am at. and that's weird!

so, bottom line for me is that i don't think anyone should scoff or say someone else needs therapy for the way they think of themselves, their body, or their lives if all they are trying to do is be healthy and they aren't being extreme. everyone does their thing in DIFFERENT WAYS and for some people it works and for others it doesn't. sometimes it just takes some retraining of your MIND to get you that last bit of the way there. i think that anyone who is attempting to do what kimberly did and what you are trying to do MMM should be commended and yes reminded that the numbers are just that numbers...but i am speaking from experience as a total foodie who adores the flavors in what i eat...that it can be hard when you are that close to your final goal OR already reached it to say 'woah lets take a look at that'. so i'd be curious after you have been doing this for a long period of time if you find yourself thinking the same way. it seems really hard to avoid.

 

[moremoremore]

I *have* been at that point before when I was happy and what I consider trim! and it was good enough for me....so I am talking from experience.... I guess I just don't understand when people always want more..more..more LOL or in this case less less less...maybe I should change my username

Like you say, it's a different way of thinking...perhaps I should read the thread again...my general impression from a quick read was that people reach goals and are "thin" and are still not happy...

It's so funny how "therapy" has such a negative connotation....and that it's interpreted that way....and that reference thereto is scoffing..it's just a different outlook on things by me I guess...therapy is a great tool and if someone is always obsessing about a number on a tag, I would really suggest it...My husband recently started going to deal with work stress and it's really amazing...

Anyhoo..off to the mall...and don't think for one minute I won't be slobbering at the Auntie Ann's ! YUM!

 

[KimberlyH]

MMM, I am not harming myself physically or mentally and am pretty content with who I am. My struggle is exactly as Mara penned it, I am so close to my goal and needed to work through whether or not it was worthwhile to continue to want to attain that goal or if it was time to adjust my goal to fit with where I am physically and mentally. Ultimately I came up with a very healthy sollution I am counting calories for a while just to see how it goes. If I never return to a size 6 I will be just fine as I am on the whole an extremely healthy and happy human being. I just so happen to take great pride in the weight I have lost and the care I take of myself physically and mentally. No therapy required.

ETA: It's not about wanting moremoremore, it's about wanting to be the best me I possibly can be, inside and out.

 

[moremoremore]

got ya....go for it girl! i understand that sometimes it is cool just to be able to say to yourself that you did it...!

 

[just_looking!]

I''ve just started using a free program you can download called CRON-o-meter. It''s great, you can enter all your details and then set what level of calories, protein, carbohydrates and fat etc. You use it like a food diary (it has the US food database linked in) and it calculates your nutritional levels.

I''ve set it at Zone proportions i.e. 30% of calories from protein, 30% of calories from fat and 40% of calories from carbohydrates and 1500kcal. CRON stands for Calorie Restriction with Optimum Nutrition I think so it''s definitely not aimed at the size 0 or die set!!

I started by just putting in the typical foods I ate for the first few days and realised that due to my hypothyroidism / estrogen dominance I actually don''t consume a huge number of calories to hold steady at this weight!! I''m 1.73m and 80kg, typically eating between 1300 and 1600 kcal per day. I work 10 hours a day, 6 - 7 days per week on a construction site so I normally get between 2 and 6 hours of walking in each day.

I have low everything - low heart rate, low basal temperature, low blood pressure and low blood sugar. These are a result of out of whack hormones so my plan is to sort out the mind numbing tiredness before i start increasing my activity levels any more.

I''m a fish eating vegetarian so eat pretty healthily, but punching in the foods made me realise that I actually eat quite a lot of fat (cheese and nuts being the worse offenders) and not enough protein. I''ve changed the proportions of what I eat and am aiming to be around 1500kcal per day. I''ve lost 0.5kg in a week with no hunger pangs so I guess the nutrition helps?!!

Might be worth looking at? Perhaps you''re lacking vitamins or minerals etc......

 

[mrchips]

Date: 1/13/2007 10:57:35 AM
Author: moremoremore
You know, i haven''t read this whole thread but I skimmed and it''s so interesting to me and I hope somewhat on point...As a currently big boned gal

(who is on day 5 of my ''lifestyle change'' not ''diet'' so I can get back to where I was when I worked out..which was never THIN but was quite nice and athletic 5''11 amazon princess

) it''s so interesting to see people''s outlook on food and their body and a struggle for a number or perfect shape...I have to say, it sounds EXHAUSTING.

I''m not saying this sarcastically,but people who obsess about a number and are obsessed with calories should probably get therapy. That follows along with MrChips great advice on being happy inside and out.. I plan on getting therapy for my outlook on food as well...I always laugh a little when I see a nice size 8 wanting to be a 6..a 6 wanting to be a 4 or a 4 wanting to be a 2. I''m really not jealous of those people b/c again, they have no grip on reality and it sounds exhausting..will they EVER be ''happy''... and by happy, I mean HAPPY and not just thin which some people equate as equal, which it''s not. You probably have a nice figure. Enjoy it and stop worrying so much. Go see someone to discuss your concerns, eat ''clean'', go work out to stay tones and keep those womanly curves...

that''s defiently the right approach. LIFESTYLE CHANGE.

it is all mental after a while. and remember, if you want it that bad, go get it and don''t stop until you have achieved it.

and personally what girls, guys and society in general have to remember, is if a girl says she''s a size 6 or size 8, that might be the right size for her. she might be really fit and in great shape and that size look good on her. know what i mean?

so that number doesn''t really mean anything to me either.

 

[rainbowtrout]

I find that I have to consciously change the way I think about women''s bodies and what is "beautiful" almost every day, honestly. It does seem to work for me, although I know this may sound a little wacky...

couple examples:

I try to look at aethestics of women''s bodies from say, 50-60 years ago when they actually looked like they ate. M. Monroe was gorgeous at an 8!

I make fun of models in fashion magazines to myself.

I listen to FI and my guy friends who say runway models are ugly and that they LIKE hips, chest, ect. And I actually try to believe them, every time.

I focus on being strong, not on being thin or fitting into a two. I was a two, for about 5 mins when I was 16. And I looked like crap, honestly. When I''m very thin now I''m a 6, and when I''m normal I''m an 8. As long as I stay in that 10-15 pound range, it''s all good.

Etcetera...

Whoever mentionned The Good Body, I saw her perform that live. Excellent show on the whole! I recommend it.

If you''re healthy, and your husband thinks you look hot, and you feel energetic, I think it''s time to stop trying to lose and start enjoying what you''ve got. I know I may get blasted for putting so much importance on how men think we look...but honestly I''ve never been able to care much about how other women (or anyone except FI, generally) think I look--I''m not sleeping with them!

 

[Mara]

rt for me it''s not just about what my husband thinks i look like (which quite honestly, he thinks i look hot whenever and didn''t think i needed to lose any weight ...hahah)...but it''s also important to me about what *I* think i look like. i dont'' place that much importance on what other people think i look like, but i want to be happy with ME and how i look and feel. and i definitely am. but i agree with kimberly that it''s totally about being the ''best possible me'' that i can be. and for me that was being super fit and in shape and healthy and strong...especially as i firmly enter my 30''s and it becomes even more crucial to be healthy in my opinion...as you get older. and it''s all within your control. and i''m pretty much there now (except for this stupid ab injury, i can practically feel my muscle tone melting away while i sit around waiting for it to heal)...but i definitely think that sometimes our mental images of ourselves need some fine tuning...especially in today''s society where whatever the ''trend'' is...is whatever people seem to want to be like. heck i just wanna look good in my clothes. lol.

 

[rainbowtrout]

I think what I was getting at was that while of course YOU are the first person to please, sometimes we women need to take a look at the positive feedback we''re getting from outside our own heads.
If we can never please ourselves, maybe we need to take a look outside ourselves.

My list of priorities sort of goes am I happy, then is he happy--and he only gets a say because I''m marrying him and I think spouses should get input on that to a rational degree

 

[Mara]

yeah that''s kind of how it goes for me too...hee hee. though he''d probably be like ''hey why isnt it ME first''...lol.

 

[KimberlyH]

RT,

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

I got on the scale this morning with the hubby standing behind me and when he saw the number he declared "that''s enough!" to which I responded, "not even close, but thanks for trying!" because I am starting to see results.

I totally get what you are saying, and agree that models need not be considered a role model for size as it is unrealistic and can only cause issues for the 98% of us not built that way. I have no desire to be Kate Moss, with my frame and shape that would be assinine (and I actually really like my curves!). But again, it''s just about being the best me (inside and out) I can. So now I''m counting cals and have added a bit more exercise into my routine and I am seeing positive results in a short period of time, so my body must be pleased with what I''m doing and I''m not starving myself. I am actually eating more frequently (1 or 2 snacks a day when I used to have none).

Re: the MM factiod, I think we need to remember our sizing has changed considerably from her time to ours. Her size 8 would constitute a size 4 now or something along those lines; designers have completely changed sizing to accomodate our larger bodies, I think we, the collective we, like to forget that so that we can feel better about ourselves. We are also growing taller over time, evolution hard at work!

 

[Mara]

lol kimberly, well greg thought i was 120 lbs the other day. i was like HA HA Not!

i don't think i will EVER be 120 lbs. which is absolutely more than fine. it's just not how my body is made or my frame is. i have wide shoulders and curvy hips and i would be a walking twig rail if i was 120 lbs. i think where i am at now is fine...and even an extra lb + wouldn't be a big deal. but for me it was not about the scale really, more about how i feel and look and how i can wear clothes ...hehee. i love looking great in clothes. that's my real mental boost. i have always loved shopping but it's so much more fun when you look good in so many more things. and you aren't trying to 'hide' or 'compensate' for something yanno. that was my real goal.

but anyway just the fact that my husband thought i was 120 made me laugh. he really has no idea of women's bodies or how they are shaped or work. he also said he had no idea that i'd lost the weight i had...that i looked fine before, heheeh. gotta love em. i also know that i do look thinner than the scale says, because my mom said the same thing. but i carry a ton of muscle too so the scale has never been accurate for me. in high school i was pretty thin from running track but i always weighed like 10 lbs more than everyone else. muscle baby!

 

[KimberlyH]

Husbands are the best! I love that John likes me just as I am and would feel the same if I weighed what I did 4 years ago. That''s part of what finding a good man is all about! He knows I''m losing because he''s eating the food with me, but if he wasn''t home for dinner every night he too might be clueless. I have fluctuated about the same 10 lbs. since he met me three years ago and he doesn''t have a clue as to when I am up or down unless I tell him.

 

[rainbowtrout]

I think men may have this idea of "120" as a standard weight. I once disillusioned a guy friend about this and my mother said "Oh no! You let them in on our big secret! All women are not 120 lbs!"


Re: Marilyn. I def. have read more than once that models and actresses in the MM era were 20 or so lbs heavier, not just clothing sizes. Well, maybe my actor/model parents are right and an 8 *is* large

In any case, you could look at other given periods in history and see the same effect---smaller isn't always seen as better.


congrats on your new routine working!

I had lost about 15 lbs in morocco but I think I may have gained much of it back during FI's visit (getting off the plane the first thing he said was "where did the rest of you GO????, followed by much nagging to eat) Grr.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/16/2007 3:16:51 PM
Author: rainbowtrout
I think men may have this idea of ''120'' as a standard weight. I once disillusioned a guy friend about this and my mother said ''Oh no! You let them in on our big secret! All women are not 120 lbs!''


Re: Marilyn. I def. have read more than once that models and actresses in the MM era were 20 or so lbs heavier, not just clothing sizes. Well, maybe my actor/model parents are right and an 8 *is* large

In any case, you could look at other given periods in history and see the same effect---smaller isn''t always seen as better.


congrats on your new routine working!

I had lost about 15 lbs in morocco but I think I may have gained much of it back during FI''s visit (getting off the plane the first thing he said was ''where did the rest of you GO????, followed by much nagging to eat) Grr.

I am so sorry if I implied that 8 is large, I don''t think it is by any means, just as I don''t think I am large.

I just have often heard women quote MM''s size (and I''ve heard anywhere from 8 to 14) as a reason why it''s okay to be that size and I think we forget that we size things differently now, except in couture clothing. Normal actor and actress weights seem to go in waves and definitely weigh less now than the 90s for example. Think of how the female cast members of friends looked when the show started in comparison to when it finished. But there was a time in the early 1900s when thin was in (all of the dancers in movies with Fred Astiare, Audrey Hepburn, etc.).

I am working very hard to find the balance between ambitiously healthy and obsessive! What you have shared adds to my food for thought, which is really helpful and important!

 

[Mara]

from what i recall, MM was a size 12 then which people commonly say refers to our american size 8 today.

 

[rainbowtrout]

Date: 1/16/2007 3:35:17 PM
Author: KimberlyH

Date: 1/16/2007 3:16:51 PM

Author: rainbowtrout

I am so sorry if I implied that 8 is large, I don''t think it is by any means, just as I don''t think I am large.


I just have often heard women quote MM''s size (and I''ve heard anywhere from 8 to 14) as a reason why it''s okay to be that size and I think we forget that we size things differently now, except in couture clothing. Normal actor and actress weights seem to go in waves and definitely weigh less now than the 90s for example. Think of how the female cast members of friends looked when the show started in comparison to when it finished. But there was a time in the early 1900s when thin was in (all of the dancers in movies with Fred Astiare, Audrey Hepburn, etc.).

No, I didn''t think you implied it. I just used to always throw MM at my parents/stepmom when they get all shocked that I wear a 6/8. ("No? Really??? But...?)

It''s fine, you''ve just shattered my body image icon FOREVER! hehe

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/16/2007 4:13:16 PM
Author: rainbowtrout

Date: 1/16/2007 3:35:17 PM
Author: KimberlyH

Date: 1/16/2007 3:16:51 PM

Author: rainbowtrout

I am so sorry if I implied that 8 is large, I don''t think it is by any means, just as I don''t think I am large.


I just have often heard women quote MM''s size (and I''ve heard anywhere from 8 to 14) as a reason why it''s okay to be that size and I think we forget that we size things differently now, except in couture clothing. Normal actor and actress weights seem to go in waves and definitely weigh less now than the 90s for example. Think of how the female cast members of friends looked when the show started in comparison to when it finished. But there was a time in the early 1900s when thin was in (all of the dancers in movies with Fred Astiare, Audrey Hepburn, etc.).

No, I didn''t think you implied it. I just used to always throw MM at my parents/stepmom when they get all shocked that I wear a 6/8. (''No? Really??? But...?)

It''s fine, you''ve just shattered my body image icon FOREVER! hehe

I would hate to be the one to shatter anyone''s anything

, so lets just go with what Mara said!!!

 

[Aloros]

First off, wow, 68 lbs! That''s quite a feat! Congrats!

It''s hard sometimes to say when enough is enough. For me it''s not a matter of weight or clothing size. I don''t own a scale. I think it should be more about how you feel. Do you feel fit and healthy? If so, you''re probably at the right weight. Not everyone is built the same way. It''s also a bit of a give and take. I used to swim competitively, and was fit, fit, fit. Very little body fat. Of course, my breasts were a little smaller, I had very little "cushion", so sitting on wooden benches or anything without padding was uncomfortable and there was much accidental painful banging of bones on protuding objects, and I had an irregular period.

I liked my body back then, but I like it a little better now. I feel a bit more "va-va-voom" and less "built for speed". If you''re still aiming for that elusive size six, then go for it, just be careful to eat properly (I never thought it was a good idea to deny yourself food if you''re hungry, besides your body just stores it as fat then) and keep healthy! Good luck!