Venting about school

[Polabowla]

I feel like my kids school is being so unreasonable. They're on zoom for the last few weeks & have ridiculously high standards . Full schoolwork & homework.
Kids must only look at the screen the entire time (um my kids are little & have adhd and can't sit thru 7 hours of zoom!)
And the latest- no other family members should be seen or heard while on zoom. But you also can't be in a bedroom.

Really? Do you think I live in a 20 room mansion?!

I've tried pushing back, they don't care. I'm beyond frustrated.

Thanks for letting me vent

 

[missy]

Ugh. That’s ridiculous and unreasonable. Not acceptable. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I’d just go about your daily schedule and while doing the best you can not give in to unreasonable and impossible to achieve demands.

And kids need a break! It’s not healthy to stare at a computer screen for hours on end.

 

[Polabowla]

Thanks @missy
I have a migraine today so I have less bandwidth to deal with the nonsense.
My kid just sat doing schoolwork from 8 am till 330 pm, now you want them to do homework also?! Or worse study for exams/do reports?

In general- even in regular times I have issues with the amount of homework after such a long day, but especially now.

 

[missy]

Thanks @missy
I have a migraine today so I have less bandwidth to deal with the nonsense.
My kid just sat doing schoolwork from 8 am till 330 pm, now you want them to do homework also?! Or worse study for exams/do reports?

In general- even in regular times I have issues with the amount of homework after such a long day, but especially now.

I’m so sorry. It’s impossible. They want the impossible. Life is challenging enough. The need to chill a bit and relax the reins. The kids will be fine. They don’t have to be so strict.

I hope you’re feeling better soon.

 

[Polabowla]

thank you!
And yes I agree!
How are you, Greg & the kitties?

 

[missy]

thank you!
And yes I agree!
How are you, Greg & the kitties?

Thanks for asking @Polabowla with so much you’re dealing with to think of others. Very kind. We’re doing ok. Kitties too. One day at a time. Doing the best we can. Sending you gentle hugs and lots of good wishes.

 

[LemonMoonLex]

Yeah - & nobody is getting paid for this. It's completely unreasonable, so much so that I'm contemplating homeschooling programs that allow you to go at your own pace. My daughter is only six & so she needs me to help her with almost everything, for 5 hours a day, five days a week...that's crazy.

I've definitely learned that my daughter is an awesome student through this at home curriculum, but what I've also learned is that I truly don't enjoy teaching - which despite her having an online teacher I'm basically her teacher as I'm implementing everything.

It's too much for parents & I'm not even working right now, I think it'd be near to impossible for single parent households who are working to complete the same amount of work...

I wish it were safe for her to go back to school as that socialization was so good for her..

 

[Polabowla]

@TheGarnetGirl I totally agree.
It's impossible & unreasonable.
Is homeschooling a reasonable option for you?

My 6 year old needs an evaluation; 2 kids have adhd/ learning disabilities so they desperately need to be in school for the services.

The other 3 are ok mostly on their own but need the social bits too.

But it all adds up.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

i think (and i don't know for sure) but its much more relaxed here

next year some high schools are offering a year 14 for students who didn't do so well with all the drama the pandemic dumped on them
Principles have been on the news telling employers not to judge kids who may have to repeat a year because of what happened in 2020

Wee kiddies and their mums and dads should not be under all this pressure
i think so long as they are still leaning to read and not falling behind on maths this should be enough

im also thinking the teachers must be under some sort of pressure also to be expecting so much

i did read this yesterday about parents of special needs kids who are really struggling with at home learning

Stuff

i.stuff.co.nz

good luck to all the mums and dads at home with kids right now
don't be hard on yourself
just do what you can

 

[Polabowla]

Thank you @Daisys and Diamonds ! That sounds so much more sensible to me!

 

[SallyBrown]

I feel like my kids school is being so unreasonable. They're on zoom for the last few weeks & have ridiculously high standards . Full schoolwork & homework.
Kids must only look at the screen the entire time (um my kids are little & have adhd and can't sit thru 7 hours of zoom!)
And the latest- no other family members should be seen or heard while on zoom. But you also can't be in a bedroom.

Really? Do you think I live in a 20 room mansion?!

I've tried pushing back, they don't care. I'm beyond frustrated.

Thanks for letting me vent

I don’t have kids. But for what it’s worth this school sounds totally insane to me.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Thank you @Daisys and Diamonds ! That sounds so much more sensible to me!

i do feel very sad and angry for your family being under all this extra stress
not that im a fan of our PM but i did like when she said a happy family at this time (durring lockdown) was much more important than school work
my sister sent he'rs back to school but i judge no one who wants to keep them at home this year
the kids next door seem to hardly be going and they went every day last year (i hear the school bus pick them up and drop them home)
and this year the authorities seem to be taking a fairly relaxed attitude to attendance (with in reason im sure)

got to feel a bit sorry for the teachers who will have to get them back into a learning routeen when back in the class room next
year
i think we are lucky here the school year is the same as the calender year
The big kids have been given extra credits and had the number of credits for university entrance reduced

One thing St Jisinta - (i mean the Prime Minister) said, was to remember every school kid in the whole world is in the same boat this year

what i think ( you know the non mom)
is whats an average life span
75- 85 years
what's the difference bwtween being a year behind at school and having a gap year before one goes to university ?
its not like the kids have anything to hide - its not like they are doing jail or anything - its explainable

i want to say to you and the kiddo have the day off
bake cookies
watch a movie.
go to the park
read a story together
wash the dog just for laughs

You know once Prince Charles gave Auckland school kids the day off and he got told off for it
Honestly teachers need to relax
i know they are under stress but
its bad enough they told off the future king, told off my dad being late to parent interviews because his plane was delayed, but putting parents under all this pressure this year is too much
chill !
or push back if you have to with in your own school admin - because maybe that's where the problem is

but back off the moms (and dads) and be kind to the kids

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I don’t have kids. But for what it’s worth this school sounds totally insane to me.

i think we can still empathize with the parents, i mean we had parents

never being a parent (or a teacher) i always look at things from the kid's perspective first
because i know how to be a kid
...not that im up with techknowledgy so i wouldn't make a very competent kid these days

 

[Cozystitches]

Teacher mama here I agree with you that all day on zoom is crazy! Kids need to be moving and not glued to a screen! I try to keep my zooms to 30min or less, thankfully my principal supports this and the students have no more than 2 scheduled zooms each day. I see my students 2x a week, and will be assigning work for their school hours, hopefully not a bunch of then "homework."

As for distractions, the only time it was mentioned was a kid who was continually distracted by her surroundings. She was distracted (and missed the information I was trying to convey) and I was distracted as well. I offered to have individual zoom with just her to help with that, parents refused. I've seen parents, siblings, pets, etc in zooms all the time. Some kids are in the family room with others there and it's hard for everyone, but it is unreasonable to ask that kids be sequestered in their own space.

This COVID education is challenging for all involved. I am thankful that we will be going back about 70% capacity, only 2 days a week for the middle schoolers, after next week. I really worry about those kids who are struggling with mental stresses because of this. Already one of my 7th graders has been on suicide watch.

It also may not be the teachers choice as to what is mandated. I've talked with teacher friends who have very little voice in the decisions being passed down. I am very thankful that I have a very supportive admin team that listens to it's teachers. In fact about 1/4 of the Middle school teachers don't feel comfortable coming back and it sounds as though they won't be forced to do so.

 

[Karl_K]

Everyone I talk to here..student parent or teacher are pulling their hair out in frusration. Out of 35 students in class maybe 2-3 are actualy learning the work using zoom and those are the ones with very active parents or grandparenta who are doing the actual teaching.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Teacher mama here I agree with you that all day on zoom is crazy! Kids need to be moving and not glued to a screen! I try to keep my zooms to 30min or less, thankfully my principal supports this and the students have no more than 2 scheduled zooms each day. I see my students 2x a week, and will be assigning work for their school hours, hopefully not a bunch of then "homework."

As for distractions, the only time it was mentioned was a kid who was continually distracted by her surroundings. She was distracted (and missed the information I was trying to convey) and I was distracted as well. I offered to have individual zoom with just her to help with that, parents refused. I've seen parents, siblings, pets, etc in zooms all the time. Some kids are in the family room with others there and it's hard for everyone, but it is unreasonable to ask that kids be sequestered in their own space.

This COVID education is challenging for all involved. I am thankful that we will be going back about 70% capacity, only 2 days a week for the middle schoolers, after next week. I really worry about those kids who are struggling with mental stresses because of this. Already one of my 7th graders has been on suicide watch.

It also may not be the teachers choice as to what is mandated. I've talked with teacher friends who have very little voice in the decisions being passed down. I am very thankful that I have a very supportive admin team that listens to it's teachers. In fact about 1/4 of the Middle school teachers don't feel comfortable coming back and it sounds as though they won't be forced to do so.

i know you are all doing your best and its stressful for teachers also
i think your school kids are very lucky to have you

 

[Polabowla]

Teacher mama here I agree with you that all day on zoom is crazy! Kids need to be moving and not glued to a screen! I try to keep my zooms to 30min or less, thankfully my principal supports this and the students have no more than 2 scheduled zooms each day. I see my students 2x a week, and will be assigning work for their school hours, hopefully not a bunch of then "homework."

As for distractions, the only time it was mentioned was a kid who was continually distracted by her surroundings. She was distracted (and missed the information I was trying to convey) and I was distracted as well. I offered to have individual zoom with just her to help with that, parents refused. I've seen parents, siblings, pets, etc in zooms all the time. Some kids are in the family room with others there and it's hard for everyone, but it is unreasonable to ask that kids be sequestered in their own space.

This COVID education is challenging for all involved. I am thankful that we will be going back about 70% capacity, only 2 days a week for the middle schoolers, after next week. I really worry about those kids who are struggling with mental stresses because of this. Already one of my 7th graders has been on suicide watch.

It also may not be the teachers choice as to what is mandated. I've talked with teacher friends who have very little voice in the decisions being passed down. I am very thankful that I have a very supportive admin team that listens to it's teachers. In fact about 1/4 of the Middle school teachers don't feel comfortable coming back and it sounds as though they won't be forced to do so.

Omg poor child- suicide watch. How horrific

I spoke to the school principals and got nowhere :'(

 

[Cozystitches]

i know you are all doing your best and its stressful for teachers also
i think your school kids are very lucky to have you

<3 Thanks. It's hard all around. Trying to find the balance is usually challenging, but adding all of this on top is insane.

Omg poor child- suicide watch. How horrific

I spoke to the school principals and got nowhere :'(

I spoke during the school board meeting and said that I was more concerned with the mental health of the middle schoolers. I'm very worried. I'm worried that these middle schoolers (ages 11-14) are at a highly sociable developmental stage and they are not getting the socialization they desperately need. As a science teacher I requested to have tables vs desks to allow for students to have time to talk to each other, to work together. HOW can I do that through zoom? HOW can I do that through the crazy social distancing rules???? I'll have 1 maybe 2 kids at a table.....

Also during the board meeting a board member mentioned that her first grader puts on a brave face, but then goes under her desk and cries. This is a FIRST GRADER! Another teacher mentioned that her son (whom I taught and is now a freshman) is becoming more of a recluse.

To me it was sad, that during the board meetings very few mentioned the mental health of the kids. I actually had a parent (of a child I don't teach and haven't met) email me to thank me for speaking up for the middle schoolers. That's one of my biggest pet peeves about our schooling: Middle schoolers are a different breed, but often get lost in a K-8 school. During the meetings I tried to speak loudly for them and tried to remind the board (who, most have younger kids) that MS is different and a One-Size-Fits-All approach is not what's best.

And now I'll get off my soap box.

 

[asscherisme]

I feel like my kids school is being so unreasonable. They're on zoom for the last few weeks & have ridiculously high standards . Full schoolwork & homework.
Kids must only look at the screen the entire time (um my kids are little & have adhd and can't sit thru 7 hours of zoom!)
And the latest- no other family members should be seen or heard while on zoom. But you also can't be in a bedroom.

Really? Do you think I live in a 20 room mansion?!

I've tried pushing back, they don't care. I'm beyond frustrated.

Thanks for letting me vent

I feel your pain. And no bedroom and nobody seen or heard in backround? Do they think others in the house will be silent and crawl on the ground to avoid being in the backround?

I tried to have my daughter do Zoom in her room but it seems to be a deadspot on my network. I tried a booster and didn't work. If she had a better connection, she would still be in her bedroom on Zoom. I had to set her up in the family room, feet from my router/modem so her Zoom will work without freezing and kicking her out of class.

I live in a small home. If I was not seen or heard all day, I literally could not eat or prepare her lunch because I could not get to the kitchen. I could not work myself if I had to be silent all day. My high school daughter can't stare at the screen all day. I feel so bad for people with smaller kids. My older kids are out of house and with just the two of us, me not being seen or heard all day is not possible. I can't imagine a house full of people!

As you said, some of us don't live in mansions! Some of us are perfectly content in our small homes!

 

[asscherisme]

Teacher mama here I agree with you that all day on zoom is crazy! Kids need to be moving and not glued to a screen! I try to keep my zooms to 30min or less, thankfully my principal supports this and the students have no more than 2 scheduled zooms each day. I see my students 2x a week, and will be assigning work for their school hours, hopefully not a bunch of then "homework."

As for distractions, the only time it was mentioned was a kid who was continually distracted by her surroundings. She was distracted (and missed the information I was trying to convey) and I was distracted as well. I offered to have individual zoom with just her to help with that, parents refused. I've seen parents, siblings, pets, etc in zooms all the time. Some kids are in the family room with others there and it's hard for everyone, but it is unreasonable to ask that kids be sequestered in their own space.

This COVID education is challenging for all involved. I am thankful that we will be going back about 70% capacity, only 2 days a week for the middle schoolers, after next week. I really worry about those kids who are struggling with mental stresses because of this. Already one of my 7th graders has been on suicide watch.

It also may not be the teachers choice as to what is mandated. I've talked with teacher friends who have very little voice in the decisions being passed down. I am very thankful that I have a very supportive admin team that listens to it's teachers. In fact about 1/4 of the Middle school teachers don't feel comfortable coming back and it sounds as though they won't be forced to do so.

My daughter's school district is moving from online only to hybrid in Nov with kids being in school 2 days a week and teachers five days a week. Any teacher that refuses to come back to the school five days a week will be fired.

I am horrified and know several amazing dedicated teachers that will lose their jobs because either they or a family member in their house have preexisting health conditions and don't feel safe going in person. It is shameful that our school district is forcing teachers to choose between their job or their health/health of loved ones.

I am also unhappy the schools are opening. They are opening because a small but vocal group of parents pestered the school board and district so hard they relented. and gave in. Meanwhile cases are on the rise where I am.

 

[GreenPapaya]

Omg, that is so sad and scary. My son is 11 and I can't imagine. He has speech and occupational therapy and was supposed to get support for anxiety but we're still trying to figure things out. I'm worried that he's beginning to like being alone. He doesn't speak to anyone or turn on his camera. He just types in speech therapy.

I was just complaining that my daughter's school called yesterday to tell me that she needs her meningitis booster shot or she won't be able to attend school remotely. By October 23 she will be kicked out of the system. She's in remote learning. And she's a senior in high school! She has a December birthday and usually gets her well visit and shots then. I had to scrambled and call the doctor and insurance and trying to balance meetings and work deadlines. I'm behind at work and super stressed and anxious. My daughter is already having academic issues at school (writing anxiety).

Sorry to complain on your thread too. I just want to say i understand. I don't have any advice or wise sayings but I feel you. Here I am trying to finish my work in the middle of the night and cannot concentrate at all. Ugh. Morning will be here soon. And yeah, I live in a tiny apartment! My kids will have to have class in the bathroom if they need their own space.

 

[Polabowla]

Please vent away, we all understand!

My middle school child is very stressed too, her class was changed & she isn't with her friends at all. She is super extroverted &last year was in a new school. The few girls who befriended her were so kind & their friendship meant so much.
Then to be with no friends on zoom so long & now none are in her class is truly affecting her.
I spoke to her principal & the guidance counselor to please switch her class, im waiting to see if they will.
Here, our neighbors are very anti restrictions & as we are a high risk family, she cannot even play with any neighbors even outdoors

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

this is one of those threads were likes are really hugs

 

[Austina]

That seems really excessive for a child so young. During the summer when our neighbours children were home, they had structured lessons, which included regular breaks, and after lunch, they were expected to do an hour of exercise outside.

 

[missy]

I was just complaining that my daughter's school called yesterday to tell me that she needs her meningitis booster shot or she won't be able to attend school remotely

That is insane! Am I reading this right? They are making her get the meningitis booster shot to attend school remotely? I am not saying she should get that booster shot (I know nothing about it) but I am just commenting on remote learning requiring a vaccine? SMH what am I missing here?

Gosh to all you parents out there this pandemic is quadruply challenging. Sending you all lots of good wishes and I know somehow you and your kids will get through this but talk about challenging. (((Hugs))) to all of you and your kids.

The school system (and other unmentionable groups) have lost their collective minds.

:/

 

[ForteKitty]

@Polabowla Your kid's school seems very unreasonable. My 5 year old in Kinder has class 8:30-1:30 with multiple breaks, and they only ask that the kids "ignore" the adults and pretend we're not there. Most of the kids have people around, some have other kids around in class too. Requiring them to be in a room with nobody else and it cannot be their bedroom? Absurd. I'd be moving schools.

We enrolled my kid in the Spanish Dual-Immersion program in January pre-covid, and I just about had a panic attack the first 3 weeks of school. For K, the class is taught in Spanish 90% of the time and we don't speak Spanish, lol. Next year, it's 80/20, and then 70/30 until it reaches 50/50. His homework is all in Spanish too, even the math word problems. We'll see how it goes but Alexa has been more helpful than us this school year. At this point we just throw our hands up and get through it day by day.

Hang in there!!

 

[MaisOuiMadame]

I'm sorry! What a mess! I have 6 kids and between the spots where WiFi is sufficient/ no noise/no siblings I'd be out of spaces after installing ONE kid in the study and ONE kid in the guest bedroom ... Second guest bedroom doesn't have reliable WiFi and the kid's rooms where their desks and all school stuff is are their bedrooms - so WT actual F do they want???
And no, my kids don't have a bedroom, study and sitting room each! Also, my friends' only children generally do not have more than one room to themselves.
In my girl's class is a family with 4 kids on about 80 sqm (8-900 sqqf)
I think. Would they be excluded from remote learning. Eagerly awaiting that discrimination lawsuit!!

And @dizzyakira wtf to that as well????

We're having problems at our own non remote school and I'm sick of that too. I think we all need a break!!!

 

[MaisOuiMadame]

You're such a wonderful teacher and beautiful human being @Cozystitches !! Thanks for standing up for the kids.


In my personal situation many teachers start unloading their frustration on the kids. I get that it's hard for everyone, but screaming at elementary and middle schoolers because of personal frustration isn't helpful.
My friend's kid got a bad report for helping her friend with a broken ankle up the stairs.That friend fell on the stairs at school , broke her ankle and fell again because crutches on said stairs don't help. She literally cannot get up the stairs with the back pack and crutches. Her friend helped her and was 3 mins late in class. Teacher, who said to the parents that he can't help the injured girl because of Covid didn't listen to the explanation. Mom of girl one wrote a polite email (I was cc cause I'm parent rep) and teacher replied he didn't know the other girl was injured (ermmmmm crutches for three weeks now..??) . And that he now knows where the girl got her nasty ways: genetics. Like mother like daughter!!
I saw that mail and truly do not know what to say anymore... TG we're only one day from our fall holidays!!

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

Those expectations are ridiculous. I teach 2/3 grade (6-8 yo) children with special needs on ZOOM. We don't start until 9AM. We go from 9-11 for 15-20 minute subject intervals with 5 minute movement/bathroom/whatever breaks between each class. I am not at all concerned with where my students are sitting or what is going on unless they are in a situation that's not safe (which has not happened). I don't even require a camera on beyond saying hello because I don't want anyone uncomfortable. We then have an over hour break for lunch where I load the practice work that was reviewed during the live lessons, I also record all of the lessons (speaker and screen only) and post them to a google drive so students who may have missed or need to rewatch can watch again at any time. In the afternoons we meet for one more 30 minute session which is a read aloud, art project, and social time. That's it for live. Any work assigned during the week is not due until the first day of the next week so there's maximum time to complete it at a decent pace. I just don't see the point in stressing people out in an already stressful time.

I would think any ridiculous expectations come from school administration, not teachers. They're the ones who approve the schedules and set the guidelines. That's who needs to be talked to.

 

[Polabowla]

My 6 year old was scolded for being late to a zoom yesterday.... really?! She is 6! With a full day of zooms. Back off