To Sell or To Trade "Up".....with a LM setting leftover?

[FrekeChild]

Ooooo...I'll totally get in line to buy that setting! Of course, I'd set a colored stone in it, because that's just what I do.

 

[Asscherhalo_lover]

As long as the diamond is taken out of the setting carefully so it is reusable you would have no problem selling that beauty! If I could I would buy it and have a gemstone cut for it, for sure! You could easily consign it with JBEG, I have consigned with them a few times and I have been very pleased with their service and would recommend them to anyone. Good luck with your decision and make sure to post pictures when you get it all figured out!

 

[lulu]

I think it would be stunning as a pendant and a lot of Pricescopers would love a Leon with a price reduction

 

[slg47]

ditto...it is beautiful! but if it doesn't bring you joy to wear it then I suppose you should take it apart... (or you could give it to me, I'd be happy to wear it for a while)

 

[VRBeauty]

I'd set the center stone in a pendant or bracelet, and put a beautiful colored stone in that incredible LM setting.

Many years ago a boyfriend bought me a blue sapphire tennis-style bracelet. He knew I loved jewelry and that was about the extent of his knowledge of the topic; I didn't know that much either, but I knew that neither the sapphires nor the setting were very good quality, and I knew I wouldn't wear that bracelet very much or get any pleasure from wearing it. So I returned it with his blessing and took the cash to my favorite independent jewelry store to see what I could find. I found two pearl and gold rings. The smaller one was very nice though not quite as bold as I like. I'd have to put in my some of my own money to get it, but less (barely) than my proceeds from the bracelet, so I (and my BF) could still call it a gift from him. I loved the larger, bolder ring, but I'd have had to put in more money than I got from the bracelet. I got the smaller ring and tried to convince myself that it was a gift from DBF. A year or two later I saw that the bolder pearl ring, the one I really wanted was still there and marked down... so I got it too. Today I like and wear both rings, but if I had to choose just one to keep, it would be the bolder ring that caught my eye in the first place.

The point is that I went through all those mental gymnastics for nothing, and I could have saved myself a bit of money if I would just have followed my heart and bought the ring I loved in the first place. So I'd find a way to keep and if necessary re-use the LM setting if possible. I'd also discuss it with the hubby, but that's just me... since Leon is the only other man involved, I suspect your hubby could take it...

 

[iota15]

Asscher in a pendant. (I think it would be gorgeous). Gemstone in the Leon.

When you're ready, and if you still want, put the Asscher back in the Leon.


But to be honest, I think you've made yourself more than clear that you do not intend to wear the ring, as is. I'd consign the Leon, or at least call Jbeg and see what they think you can get for it. You might not sustain that great a loss. Considering you're not even wearing it or would wear it, I think any money back is a bonus.

 

[starryeyed]

Pardon my ignorance - who is JBEG??

 

[rosetta]

Jewels by erica grace.

But I would so buy that setting off you too...

 

[starryeyed]

Thanks Dee-Jay for your thoughts - no events other than the recent birth of my daughter. How I wouldn't love to be graduation age (and weight) again!

DreamerD, I work for myself - home office. It's proving very difficult with a baby. I like plain solitaires, but that's just me. I went thru a period when I loved bezels. I think my username should have been "Fickle Fanny"!

Portee, FrekeChild, AsscherHalo, lulu, sig47, VRBeauty. iota15 - thanks for you thoughts gals! I'm checking out Jewels by Erica Grace as we speak. I may just stick the setting on eBay with a "Best Offer" and if that doesn't work, go with consignment. There's no way you guys won't know about it if I do it!

I also thought about asking Leon for a trade - like the total ring in exchange for a smaller pendant and that gorgeous Zambian emerald ring he has on his micropave site. That might not work though because he'd have to come out-of-pocket to produce a pendant, right?

HOW SHALL I SET A PENDANT??? Whaddaya think?

 

[Ella]

Please remember that we do not allow solicitations for sales on Pricescope from either buyers or sellers.

 

[starryeyed]

Please remember that we do not allow solicitations for sales on Pricescope from either buyers or sellers.

No worries Ella. I only meant my PS friends will be along for the ride throughout the process of deciding what to do, choosing a setting, and sharing the pictures. I couldn't live without everyone's support! Thanks for the reminder.

 

[Circe]

You are bezel averse? I admit I adore Circes bezel -- thick and delish -- on a long chain. YUMMM! You can either keep the asscher or trade. I think a trade is a good plan as an asscher is not the best stone for a necklace in my opinion.... though with a halo of rbs I might change my mind

Why Dreamer, thank you kindly.

As for what to get if you hate bezels and bails ... I think I'd go for a martini slider to avoid the flipping issue. BGD makes a lovely stationary martini, which I bet they could adapt: alternately, given the existing relationship, I'd be tempted to just give the stone to Leon and tell him to do his worst ... maybe something with a colorful halo?

 

[starryeyed]

Circe, I hope I didn't insult you. "Hate" is probably too strong a word - I liked bezels for a while, now I'm kinda tired of them, for myself. I see them on some people and they are perfect. I'm in the prong-phase right now.

Has anybody seen the side view of Whiteflash's 3-prong and 4-prong pendant settings?

I LOVE the C de Cartier setting - have you seen it? Gorgeous! Roberto Coin has a similar setting for their Cento diamonds, but the Cartier is much crisper looking in my eyes. I wouldn't mind something similar, but 3-prong is tempting too. Anyone have pictures??

 

[Circe]

Circe, I hope I didn't insult you. "Hate" is probably too strong a word - I liked bezels for a while, now I'm kinda tired of them, for myself. I see them on some people and they are perfect. I'm in the prong-phase right now.

Has anybody seen the side view of Whiteflash's 3-prong and 4-prong pendant settings?

I LOVE the C de Cartier setting - have you seen it? Gorgeous! Roberto Coin has a similar setting for their Cento diamonds, but the Cartier is much crisper looking in my eyes. I wouldn't mind something similar, but 3-prong is tempting too. Anyone have pictures??

Oh, no offense taken at all - wouldn't even occur to me! We all have our quirks about jewels.

I hope somebody out there posts some interesting possibilities for you - maybe starting a new thread now that you've definitely decided to trade up might garner better results and lure in the pendant owners with suggestions?

 

[missydebby]

The most important thing is for you to be content.

If that means taking on the family conditions/dynamics that have you hiding your ring in a drawer, then do that.

If that means leaving those crazy dynamics alone and taking on the ring itself, then do that.

One's not better than the other. And only you can decide what's gonna bring you better satisfaction.

*hugs*

 

[LaurenThePartier]

Starryeyed, I did this with Erica Grace's Asscher and this seems to be the kiss of death for me , but if you are still considering selling the whole thing, I would love to get in line.

 

[starryeyed]

Great idea Circe - will do!

MissDebby, thanks for rolling with the whole crazy scenario and not pressuring me to have a reveal. It's complicated. Nuff said.

Asscher, what a devil you are!

 

[GliderPoss]

Yup, I'll take the burden of wearing it for you if you like?

Best of luck with your decision.

 

[Cehrabehra]

This may sound harsh, but I mean it in the kindest way

You are married - at the core of every marriage, at least in my eyes, is honesty. Maybe you don't want to wear the ring - that's fine. But I think starting a conversation with your husband that starts, "I've never mentioned it but before we were together I bought myself...." There is NOTHING wrong with you buying something for yourself and you shouldn't act like you're ashamed of that fact. Having it out in the open is step #1 in my opinion. The second part of the conversation coud go like this: "It's a beautiful ring, but I don't like it as well as the ring you gave me and I feel like I should sell this one or something and I would like your thoughts on it."

I would not condone the deceptive road. Out in the open is best - especially since you said your husband would understand. If he was some abusivce tyrant I suppose I could see being duplicitous but then I'd suggest selling it and putting the money toward your getting out of a bad marriage fund.

 

[oranges]

This may sound harsh, but I mean it in the kindest way

You are married - at the core of every marriage, at least in my eyes, is honesty. Maybe you don't want to wear the ring - that's fine. But I think starting a conversation with your husband that starts, "I've never mentioned it but before we were together I bought myself...." There is NOTHING wrong with you buying something for yourself and you shouldn't act like you're ashamed of that fact. Having it out in the open is step #1 in my opinion. The second part of the conversation coud go like this: "It's a beautiful ring, but I don't like it as well as the ring you gave me and I feel like I should sell this one or something and I would like your thoughts on it."

I would not condone the deceptive road. Out in the open is best - especially since you said your husband would understand. If he was some abusivce tyrant I suppose I could see being duplicitous but then I'd suggest selling it and putting the money toward your getting out of a bad marriage fund.

+1! If you just don't want the ring, by all means--sell it. However, I'm just not understanding the whole hiding it from your husband thing--honesty is really important.

 

[Harriet]

Dearie,

As it's such a significant piece, how about selling the ring through one of the auction houses (private sales division) or Circa?

I understand your need for privacy.

 

[starryeyed]

Thanks HotPozzum.

Cebra and Oranges - I understand what you are saying. Your suggestion is so clear and simple and sounds so easy, which this should be. It's not that I intend to be deceptive. Maybe I'll think about saying something.

I keep thinking about how to respond to your questions. I could literally go on and on for pages about financial perceptions, control issues, in-laws, transparency, etc., but I was hoping to avoid that!

 

[starryeyed]

Dearie,

As it's such a significant piece, how about selling the ring through one of the auction houses (private sales division) or Circa?

I understand your need for privacy.

Good idea Harriet - I thought about Sotheby's, but I think I'm better off trading it in for what I paid and getting something that I will feel better about wearing regularly. I'm not familiar with Circa?

From the little research I've been able to do, I understand wholesale diamonds are trading at anywhere from 40% to 70% OF (not off) Rap, depending on the stone. And except to a few people, IF clarity just isn't worth the premium. So after the auction commission, I could expect a pretty paltry sum. Do you see it any differently?

For me, it's about waste - I think the stone (or ring) could find a better home and I could have something more usable for me.

 

[vbnet]

The ring is gorgeous. But it seems to symbolize something you're not comfortable with. I do wonder, though, will selling/trading in the ring help you be more comfortable with what you're uncomfortable with (and I don't think it's the ring per se). I don't expect you to answer that question here -- just something for you to think about so you don't make a decision you might regret.

I agree with this, I'd hate for you to go thru al lthis trouble then still be in an uncomfortable situation.


If you really have tired of the ring, or if the size/style is just not right for who you are now -- well, that happens,

If this is the case or if you find yourself wanting a pendant and this is a way to pay for it, go for it.


Personally, I would tell dh it's something you bought a long time ago. If it's a $$ thing, like why did you spend so much when we were obviously (in his mind) going to get together.... then say the project was in the works before then, you had a deposit on it ...
If you still like the ring at all, let it be your push present. You don't have to wear it ALL the time, maybe special occasions.

I think when the new ring, or the new pendant appears, there will still be some explaining or story-telling necessary - (please I'm not being negative, just want you to be ready). Usually the simpler the better it goes over.

 

[starryeyed]

vbnet, the more I think about what you wrote and what everyone has written, the more I think I could disclose the ring, as a no-big-deal long-time-ago thing, and say I want to trade it for a pendant. Have the pendant be the focus and minimize ring - just have it be the way to pay for the pendant.

I feel like I'm laundering diamonds!

 

[Harriet]

Dearie,

As it's such a significant piece, how about selling the ring through one of the auction houses (private sales division) or Circa?

I understand your need for privacy.

Good idea Harriet - I thought about Sotheby's, but I think I'm better off trading it in for what I paid and getting something that I will feel better about wearing regularly. I'm not familiar with Circa?

From the little research I've been able to do, I understand wholesale diamonds are trading at anywhere from 40% to 70% OF (not off) Rap, depending on the stone. And except to a few people, IF clarity just isn't worth the premium. So after the auction commission, I could expect a pretty paltry sum. Do you see it any differently?

For me, it's about waste - I think the stone (or ring) could find a better home and I could have something more usable for me.

Hmm, I wonder if the Sotheby's/Christie's clientele would pay a premium for an IF. They'll be able to connect you to the Asian market which has demand for diamonds such as yours. Try the private sales divisions. Transactipn costs could be less as the ring will not have to be published etc.

Circa is a company that buys and resells high-end jewellery. They buy pieces outright, rather than holding them on consignment.

 

[starryeyed]

I looked up Circa Harriet. Looks like an easy process. They may be a good avenue for the setting. Thanks for the tip. Eay is key when you have a baby!

SanDiegoLady, I know you think I'm crazy, but I just don't have it in me to wear it.....

 

[betty6333]

I think it is great you will just tell DH you acquired it before you married and you want to change it up now. I know it will be a little daunting at the intro , but I bet he will understand.

I am sure it will trade in for a gorgeous pendant and DH will be thrilled it wont pinch into the budget too much! My DH always rolls his eyes when I am looking into upgrading/ changing a ring or jewelery around... But he understands that diamonds are my pet project,/hobby and he has his own pricy hobbies that I could harass him about, so we let each other be happy and just smile and nod when either one of us embarks on a new project.

 

[starryeyed]

... But he understands that diamonds are my pet project,/hobby and he has his own pricy hobbies that I could harass him about, so we let each other be happy and just smile and nod when either one of us embarks on a new project.

You too, huh. My husband is into buying "useful" tools and building boats. I can see why, but I prefer diamonds!

 

[Harriet]

Didn't someone say she'd take me sailing when I learnt to swim?