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smurfysmiles?

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angielea

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Hey Ladies -

Has anyone heard from SmurfySmiles? Last I had read there were some issues with the flooding in her home town, but it doesn''t look like she''s updated since then... She''s usually a staple on the board..

Smurfy if you''re out there, everything ok?
 

Hudson_Hawk

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Last I heard Smurfy decided PS wasn''t the place for her and she has stopped posting here. I wish her luck wherever she is...
 

angielea

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wow! I completely missed that! Thanks for updating me.
 

Kayakqueen83

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haha....I was just thinking that we hadn''t heard from Smurfy in awhile and was going to start the thread too! (great minds think alike!) Thanks for the info Hudson!
 

jstarfireb

Ideal_Rock
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Aww, that''s too bad. I always enjoyed reading her threads/posts.
 

AmberGretchen

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I totally missed that too - I agree though, I hope she''s doing well, wherever she is.
 

Italiahaircolor

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Oh
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thats unfortunate. I also missed and was just thinking of her today...

Although she and I didn't always mesh, I enjoyed her mostly and I liked that she was always willing to help out someone in need of digital design work. In my opinion, it spoke volumes about her that she would commit that much time/energy into things that directly effect her but benefited a relative stranger, ya know?

I hope that she's doing well and eventually finds her way back to PS. I hate to think that with all the positivity that can be had here on PS, sometimes the bad outweighs that for people and they leave.

If it doesn't create a big bru-ha-ha and breaks the forum policy...what happened? And please, don't turn my question into a bashing of Smurfy, either...I'm just curious for the sake of curosity.
 

FrekeChild

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Date: 4/22/2009 3:02:06 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
I hope that she''s doing well and eventually finds her way back to PS. I hate to think that with all the positivity that can be had here on PS, sometimes the bad outweighs that for people and they leave.

If it doesn''t create a big bru-ha-ha and breaks the forum policy...what happened? And please, don''t turn my question into a bashing of Smurfy, either...I''m just curious for the sake of curosity.
She said that she was stressed out from other stuff, and that PS was stressing her out too. I believe she took offense to some well-intentioned advice. She also mentioned some other stuff that got the thread deleted.

I think she threatened to leave several times. So I''m guessing she was pretty unhappy here.
 

kama_s

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I also re-call her mentioning she found another friendlier forum to post on. So maybe she''s still somewhere out there, if any of you frequent any other bridal forums.
 

Italiahaircolor

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Well, I''m happy she''s happy...even if it is elsewhere.

Sometimes asking for advice is a slippery slope.

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SarahLovesJS

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Date: 4/22/2009 7:45:44 PM
Author: Italiahaircolor
Well, I'm happy she's happy...even if it is elsewhere.

Ditto...hate to see her go..but want her to be happy. Do miss her brightness though.
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PilsnPinkysMom

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This is *sort off* off topic, but I felt like expressing my views on BWW (& I guess PS) as a whole...

From time-to-time advice *sounds* harsh... but 1) that's SO very rare 2) If you ask for advice you're going to get it 3) This isn't a place to just seek out positive confirmation for every-little-thing... (though generally it's a super-positive forum!)

The thing that's GREAT about PS, IMHO, is that if you hang out long enough, you realize that this a pretty small community... And you start to get to "know" other posters (esp. if you only post in a few forums)... And even if it's only a virtual community, you truly, truly get a feel for other peoples' personalities!

...And once you reach that point, advice that once sounded harsh to you suddenly becomes enlightening and helpful because you know that poster XYZ is a crafting-goddess and knows how to make awesome invites, poster ZYX has experience in the bridal industry and knows what can/can't be done with dress alterations, and nearly ALL posters are jewelry MAVENS and want you to look your absolute *best* on your wedding day.

I'm not saying that every PS/BWW contributor is always right about everything, but for the most part, if a BIW says, "Hey... you know... I'm not digging that... maybe try *this* instead" 99.999% of the time it's super-smart to listen, because this forum is full of keen eyes and bridal-savvy ladies.

:sigh: I just
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Pricescope!

And the bottom line is: If you don't wanna know what people TRULY think, don't ask
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(Disclaimer: This is no way about Smurfy or her reasons for leaving... the OP just got me thinkin')
 

angielea

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Date: 4/22/2009 9:26:14 PM
Author: PilsnPinkysMom
This is *sort off* off topic, but I felt like expressing my views on BWW (& I guess PS) as a whole...


From time-to-time advice *sounds* harsh... but 1) that''s SO very rare 2) If you ask for advice you''re going to get it 3) This isn''t a place to just seek out positive confirmation for every-little-thing... (though generally it''s a super-positive forum!)


The thing that''s GREAT about PS, IMHO, is that if you hang out long enough, you realize that this a pretty small community... And you start to get to ''know'' other posters (esp. if you only post in a few forums)... And even if it''s only a virtual community, you truly, truly get a feel for other peoples'' personalities!


...And once you reach that point, advice that once sounded harsh to you suddenly becomes enlightening and helpful because you know that poster XYZ is a crafting-goddess and knows how to make awesome invites, poster ZYX has experience in the bridal industry and knows what can/can''t be done with dress alterations, and nearly ALL posters are jewelry MAVENS and want you to look your absolute *best* on your wedding day.


I''m not saying that every PS/BWW contributor is always right about everything, but for the most part, if a BIW says, ''Hey... you know... I''m not digging that... maybe try *this* instead'' 99.999% of the time it''s super-smart to listen, because this forum is full of keen eyes and bridal-savvy ladies.


:sigh: I just
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Pricescope!


And the bottom line is: If you don''t wanna know what people TRULY think, don''t ask
41.gif



(Disclaimer: This is no way about Smurfy or her reasons for leaving... the OP just got me thinkin'')


I think that''s very interesting. I agree that those on this board are just trying to help out everyone else out, and especially when people ask for opinions, they''re not always going to get affirmation.

However, if she was feeling sensitive, i can kind of understand that. As a midwest bride myself, with a budget/scale much smaller than most on this board, it can be easy to feel intimidated. When you feel intimidated, it may be easier to view comments as ''negative'' even if they''re meant as positive feedback.

Not trying to cause trouble, really really. In my lurking, I''ve found the people of this board to be nothing less than wonderful!
 

FrekeChild

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It''s funny Pilsn, Gypsy posted something almost identical to what you wrote over in LIW a little while ago.


I agree that when you ask for opinions, you''re going to get them. Affirmation is not common in this forum period. In most of the threads that Smurfy started, she was looking for affirmation (one that I''m remembering in particular) and when she didn''t get it, and got opinions (that she had asked for), she got defensive and threatened to leave.
 

Dannielle

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Well said, well said
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galvana

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wow.......... i can''t believe this. im shocked....I too was wondering where she was

i never saw any of the threads were there were "threats to leave" -
and i don''t quite understand why one would do that............ threaten to leave ? ??
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maybe if i had seen the threads it would make more sense to me.

hope she''s well either way though -
 

Italiahaircolor

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Forums aren''t one size fits all. I have on other sites where it''s all hugs and kisses and pats on the back...I have been to other sites where it''s f-bombs and death threats. You need to find where you''re happiest and where you mesh well with the other members. This just wasn''t the right site for Smurfy.
 

galvana

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Date: 4/23/2009 2:44:43 AM
Author: FrekeChild
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-collage-so-far.99033/

On the first page, with her FI''s opinion, towards the bottom.
Thanks Freke, ....................and Oh - My - God.
LOL - am i horrible for laughing at this? I am in shock, still! I think Doodle said it best....

"The whole point of this site is to exchange ideas, information, and opinions, and you flipping out because everyone didn''t GUSH over your vision is, in my opinion, disrespectful to the members of this site who come on with the intention of helping and sharing, and it goes against everything PS strives to achieve by offering an outlet for creativity and learning."

wow, i still can''t believe that i just read, what i just read. -
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Hudson_Hawk

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Date: 4/23/2009 8:55:01 AM
Author: iloveprincesscuts
Date: 4/23/2009 2:44:43 AM

Author: FrekeChild

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-collage-so-far.99033/


On the first page, with her FI''s opinion, towards the bottom.
Thanks Freke, ....................and Oh - My - God.

LOL - am i horrible for laughing at this? I am in shock, still! I think Doodle said it best....


''The whole point of this site is to exchange ideas, information, and opinions, and you flipping out because everyone didn''t GUSH over your vision is, in my opinion, disrespectful to the members of this site who come on with the intention of helping and sharing, and it goes against everything PS strives to achieve by offering an outlet for creativity and learning.''


wow, i still can''t believe that i just read, what i just read. -
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Someone needs to post this in some of the interior decorating threads...
 

violet3

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Premium
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Date: 4/23/2009 8:59:19 AM
Author: Hudson_Hawk

Date: 4/23/2009 8:55:01 AM
Author: iloveprincesscuts

Date: 4/23/2009 2:44:43 AM

Author: FrekeChild

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-collage-so-far.99033/


On the first page, with her FI''s opinion, towards the bottom.
Thanks Freke, ....................and Oh - My - God.

LOL - am i horrible for laughing at this? I am in shock, still! I think Doodle said it best....


''The whole point of this site is to exchange ideas, information, and opinions, and you flipping out because everyone didn''t GUSH over your vision is, in my opinion, disrespectful to the members of this site who come on with the intention of helping and sharing, and it goes against everything PS strives to achieve by offering an outlet for creativity and learning.''


wow, i still can''t believe that i just read, what i just read. -
38.gif

Someone needs to post this in some of the interior decorating threads...
There are interior decorating threads?
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Where the heck are they? Hangout? I''d like to read them too - i really need to "get out" more, although i feel like i try to get to the other sections of this forum
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meresal

Ideal_Rock
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Date: 4/23/2009 2:44:43 AM
Author: FrekeChild
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-collage-so-far.99033/

On the first page, with her FI''s opinion, towards the bottom.
Freke, I had a reply posted last night (which I deleted), I knew exactly what thread you were talking about...

Here''s my opinion. Smurfy''s time here on PS was limited. It was like a bad breakup that you keep going back to. Threaten to leave, come back 2 days later, threaten to leave, came back a week later... she was bound to say good-bye for good at some point, but she was only able to do it, once she found "someone" (another thread) to go to.

I do hope that she is doing well, and has found a forum that better suits her. I do wish I would have gotten to see those shoes she was waiting for though.
 

wannaBMrsH

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Joined
Sep 27, 2008
Messages
1,049
Date: 4/23/2009 9:09:45 AM
Author: meresal

Date: 4/23/2009 2:44:43 AM
Author: FrekeChild
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-collage-so-far.99033/

On the first page, with her FI''s opinion, towards the bottom.
Freke, I had a reply posted last night (which I deleted), I knew exactly what thread you were talking about...

Here''s my opinion. Smurfy''s time here on PS was limited. It was like a bad breakup that you keep going back to. Threaten to leave, come back 2 days later, threaten to leave, came back a week later... she was bound to say good-bye for good at some point, but she was only able to do it, once she found ''someone'' (another thread) to go to.

I do hope that she is doing well, and has found a forum that better suits her. I do wish I would have gotten to see those shoes she was waiting for though.
Meresal, you crack me up! That is the best analogy I''ve read in a long, long time. And as a shoe-lover myself, it''s makes total sense to me that you feel the loss of not seeing the final shoe product!
 

FrekeChild

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
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Messages
19,456
Ditto HH! That could be said in every single area of PS (with the sole exception of SMTR), and is still excellent advice.

Mere, I figured a lot of people would know what I was talking about. That thread was very memorable for me, as I''m guessing for a lot of people. I completely agree about the breakup analogy (much like a relationship in my past!) and just like that relationship, I couldn''t leave until I had someone to go to. Spot on my dear!

Lol about the shoes.
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VRBeauty

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
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11,210
There was also this recent thread, not Smurfy''s, but she really reacted to people giving advice:

https://www.pricescope.com/forum/ladies-in-waiting/drunk-words-sober-thoughts-t110649-150.html

Anyhow, I wish her well and hope she''s found a good new on-line home. Plus, I do miss her smile! I wish she''d left us with one of her older avatars!!!
 

Hudson_Hawk

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Date: 4/23/2009 9:05:22 AM
Author: violet3
Date: 4/23/2009 8:59:19 AM

Author: Hudson_Hawk


Date: 4/23/2009 8:55:01 AM

Author: iloveprincesscuts


Date: 4/23/2009 2:44:43 AM


Author: FrekeChild


https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/my-collage-so-far.99033/



On the first page, with her FI''s opinion, towards the bottom.
Thanks Freke, ....................and Oh - My - God.


LOL - am i horrible for laughing at this? I am in shock, still! I think Doodle said it best....



''The whole point of this site is to exchange ideas, information, and opinions, and you flipping out because everyone didn''t GUSH over your vision is, in my opinion, disrespectful to the members of this site who come on with the intention of helping and sharing, and it goes against everything PS strives to achieve by offering an outlet for creativity and learning.''



wow, i still can''t believe that i just read, what i just read. -
38.gif


Someone needs to post this in some of the interior decorating threads...
There are interior decorating threads?
33.gif
Where the heck are they? Hangout? I''d like to read them too - i really need to ''get out'' more, although i feel like i try to get to the other sections of this forum
1.gif

There are a few, nothing really specific though (just talking about paint colors,etc). I think they''re in Hangout
 

dreaming of the day

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jun 12, 2008
Messages
480
Smurfy and I didn''t really see eye to eye on many things... she was always willing to dish it out but never willing to take it. I had many threads where I asked for "opinions" which she gladly gave without taking my feelings into consideration; however, that is the reason why I post - for honest opinions. I can recall when I just wanted to "vent" and she went on a tangent about how wrong my feelings were! I am not cutting her down, but it was really a double edged sword with her.

I do wish her well with her new "boyfriend"
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! (awesome analogy by the way Meresal).
 

CNOS128

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 28, 2008
Messages
2,700
I wish someone would interior decorate my apartment. That''s something I just don''t have the motivation to do. I don''t even have enough motivation to start a thread asking about my decorations....

I do hope Smurfy is happier. But I also think, while people didn''t ruthlessly pick on her, she seemed to have opinions that not a lot of people agreed with. I can see why she would have felt picked-on, even if no one was intentionally picking on her. But I can see where said people would have gotten frustrated. Etc.
 

purrfectpear

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Messages
4,079
I never noticed anyone picking on her. I think we all tactfully avoided mentioning the fact that it was a little strange when she broke up with a long term boyfriend, "met" a new guy and moved in within 4 months, was engaged within 6, moved across the country without jobs, etc.

All she wanted to hear about was "true love" and "age doesn''t matter"
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